i once saw someone say "i would rather people say "she's a person" than "they're a girl"" which makes so much sense to me because i like she/her pronouns but the way that the moon is referred to with she/her, in a way that's unrelated to my gender and doesn't mean i'm a girl (hope this makes sense and maybe helps anyone because it really helped me with my pronouns)

This does help that genderless soul thing is so relatable

13:41 "Just because there isn't someone on the internet who feels the same way as you, it doesn't mean you're not valid."

I have a question, just because I'm really unsure about my gender identity/label myself: I know that gender is a construct of socialisation, what we see and learn etc, but if I am questioning these gender roles it doesn't automatically mean I question being a 'woman', right? For me personally I question the stereotypes linked to the 'female' gender role (like wearing 'feminine' clothes, 'acting' feminine etc), but that doesn't automatically mean I can't confidently label myself as female? I feel fine with she/her pronouns, but I just don't feel comfortable with the assumptions/stereotypes linked to it. Like, I can dress super masculine and hide my boobs and still be a confident woman... I am kind of lost, is there anyone out there feeling the same? Sorry if that was a bit confusing 💜 Edit: thank you so much for all the answers, you guys are amazing!!!

Omg! I’m genderfluid pansexual and I love to see more representation!

Omg I love you so much, you’re such a special human being and such an inspiration. You’ve helped me so much with my sexuality and so much more, so thank you

ive kinda been tentatively identifying as genderfluid but i was kinda unsure because i didnt really know if i actually was but this video kinda helped me a little and i really related to your experiences and im feeling a little more secure in my identity now :) thank you

((Okay but you look SO fire in this video. SLAY QUING))

i’m in love with keara! they’re such an inspiration

This is insanely helpful, I've been thinking I don't entirely identify as female and when you were talking about days not feeling like a female, your boobs and somedays just feeling uncomfortable in your more "feminine" clothing is really how I feel!!!!!!!!!

as someone who's been identifying as non binary and has been looking into genderfluidity this is so helpful. i really wish i would've seen a video like this years ago, i also had a very narrow view of what non binary is and it makes me so see other people talk about it because i relate a lot to your experience so thankyou so much by the way: i would recommend looking into microlabels of genderfluid, one of them being genderfae which is never really feeling like a man (which sound a lot like you described) even if you only identify as gfluid it's still nice to have a label that you really relate to

I've been feeling almost exactly the same way- I'm still super confused with myself, and today was a particularly stressful one. This REALLY made me feel a lot better. Thank you for sharing this!!

I identify as pangender, and I always shame myself for dressing 'too feminine' to be pangender. Thank you so much for this message, I really needed it. I'm starting to accept myself as pangender even though I dress pretty feminine.

CONGRATS ON FINDING YOURSELF KEARA 💕💕

OMG! I identify so much with that! But I am 16 and I live in my parents house, so I don't feel I have the freedom yet to explore my gender, deep down I feel am not 100% she/her and I feel reliaved to know that the espectrum of gender is soo vast. Along my life I always questioned the divison of clothes between "feminine" and "masculine" and I have researched genderless clothes and I loved. Sometimes I feel more to the "male" side and others to the "female" side. I have a hole life to explore that, so I am very happy that I discovered that and to show that here. Thank you Keara for sharing your own experiences and to open the dialog once more. Kisses, love u!

As a teen, enby genderfluid, lesbian, I live for this content

Translady here so cool to hear about people discovering themselves, and also educating people about the spectrum of gender identity. Thanks for doing It in such a relatable way :)

oh my God this video feels like the permission I needed to finally actually acknowledge how i'm feeling about my gender and actually maybe identify as genderfluid for the first time. this makes me feel so so seen and heard and like i'm going to be okay. thank you so much

This video has really helped me. I realized that I am genderfluid back in June, but have been struggling with feeling valid for a number of reasons, one of them being that no one else seemed to have experiences similar to mine. It only got worse when my parents found out and berated me to the point I had to convince them that they had successfully "converted" me because they were beginning to scare me. Hearing that your experiences with gender identity are similar to mine has helped me realize that I am not the odd one out when it comes to being genderfluid. Thank you for making me feel so accepted and valid.

I've been questioning my gender since 2020 and it's been mostly awfully uncomfortable (not always), but your video helped so much, Keara! I could relate to it pretty much 100% :) thank youuuu

Im genderfluid too! Im so proud of you for being able to speak so openly about your identity! 💗🤍💜🖤💙

I cannot tell you how much I appreciate this video! I’ve started exploring my gender identity and had seen the term demigirl but never gave it much thought (I will admit that exploring my gender identity has prompted me to become more educated about our/the queer community) and reading that definition BLEW MY MIND. It’s literally the closest I have come to feeling like a gender identity ‘fits’ me, so THANK YOU! I would love to see more videos about your journey, this one has been amazing! Thank you again! 💗💜💙

ahhh i love you! i’m excited to hear your story :)

this is such an important video SO PROUD OF YOU QUING

OMG YAYYYYYYYYYYYYY NEW GENDERFLUID FRIEND!!!!!!! SO PROUD OF U KEARA!!!!!! i am genderfluid and use all pronouns so somedays i am a girl, sometimes a guy, sometimes neither yk (and btw i do have a pixie cut and it's so great a waitor called me he for the first time last week) WAIT I JUST FINISHED THE VIDEO AND IM PAN AS WELL OMG GO US

✨fluid✨ i’m so proud of you keara!! this video helped me and i know it’ll help many others!! keep being you because i love you so much ♥️♥️

thank you for posting this 🥺 i loved your take and i resonate so much with your journey!!

This is officially my favorite video on the internet. Thank you so much Keara for posting this. It makes me feel seen and heard. To know that someone who’s content I love and that I look up to feels and identifies the same way as me is very reassuring and comforting. ❤️ Peace and love always!

i follow you since i was seventeen in my own journey of understanding my identity and my sexuality & now i'm twenty about to turn twenty one, since then i've been understanding more and more the fluidity of things and how i used to identify with being one thing and as i grown that label doesn't fit me anymore, so it kinda feels like a hug to see you are also going through changes, my teenager self looked up to you a lot and i still do it nowadays. thank you for being brave and for being kind, i admire you a lot

Yas quing!!!! Keep on doing what you're doing and keep on being you!! It's totally normal to change labels, identities, etc. as we are ALL still discovering ourselves. So proud of you, Keara!! :)))

your videos are seriously so helpful and insightful, thank you for making them :)

I love how open you are about you discovering yourself! Proud of you & love you xx

Omg Congrats Keara!! I am honestly so grateful for creators like you, because I, myself am struggling to figure out with my gender identity. And seeing you and others speaking so freely about something i can relate so much with, is honestly so helpful and heartwarming. Especially since, I'm in an environment that doesn't necessarily have much representation of that. thanks b

yes!!! varying representation of nonbinary expression is essentiallll

Thank you so so much for posting this 💗 you are amazing x

Thank you for existing and making a video that happened to be on my feed at just the right time , it’s very encouraging that you are so confident talking about these topics on the internet . And thank you for helping so many people like I’m sure your videos do . X

I relate so much with your experience! Thank you so much for this video ❤️

I just felt good watching this video, it's been a while since I started to question my gender and this type of video is very important for me, to feel that there are many people with similar experiences and that it's okay to be like that, to feel represented: )

Ayyyy awesome! Thank you for making this video it does help!!!

Thank you so much for this video! I’m struggling to come to terms with my identity, but listening to these experiences and also seeing how people around me navigate their own growth is super encouraging. 💛

Keara . I've been watching your channel almost 3 years now and it's so nice to see how you've grown as a person . You're such an incredible human being,thank you so much for making this video,as a fellow genderfluid/demigirl it makes me feel very validated and I understood everything you said perfectly . I'm 19,also go by she/they pronouns and started doing so around the back end of 2020 when I started to question my gender . Growing up I felt like I really had to force myself to be feminine,I hated wearing dresses and skirts etc and omg bras were the absolute worst . I always assumed it was because my chest is quite flat that I felt so insecure until I realised,yeah I don't enjoy having breasts one bit ! If I wore a dress it just felt incredibly wrong and made me so uncomfortable . Now over the past couple of years due to trauma and personal events I've changed my appearance quite a lot and while I'm a lot happier now I still sometimes experience dysphoria if I wear something feminine . But then uno occasionally if I wear a binder under the one dress I still down thats less sort of dress like I don't mind too much 😅 a lot of the clothes I wear now are either men's or unisex because women's just get too tight or make me feel icky lol People need to understand that sexuality and gender experience is different for everyone,and it can change multiple times throughout your life . I came out to my parents as a lesbian,now I feel like I'm on the asexual spectrum and possibly biromantic so I don't really use labels anymore Anyway thank you for making this once again,thank you to you and Jessie and all the amazing people who've helped me on my journey 🥰

Proud of you Keara!!! ❤💅🏼

Thanks for being so open, you are really helping me

That was a great video! I liked how you drew your spectrum if that makes sense. Also your eyeliner is AMAZING.

I identify with your experience here. I have been struggling with this a lot and you are helping me be making this video

I appreciate that you made this video so so much!! It felt very validating for me because lately I have questioned my own gender identity and I relate quite a lot to your experience! I think I may fit somewhere under the demigirl part of the gender umbrella :D

I AM SO HERE FOR THIS VIDEO!

you're so amazing! I love how confident you are and how kind of you to share all these to us! I've learned so much since I started watching ur video.

KIRERA ! i dont think ive ever resonated with a person at this level, i think i might be genderfluid ? so, thank you

wow this has just unlocked so much for me…. i’ve been questioning my gender for the past couple months and trying to figure shit out and what you just said clicked and made so much sense. Thank you for giving me the words to help me come out and find myself♥️

i almost cried in this video, u have no idea about how much you inspire people 💛

BESTIE YOU LOOK INCREDIBLE :,) I AM SO SO SO SO SO PROUD OF YOUU IN EVERY WAY SHAPE AND FORM- UGH I LOVE YOU ENDLESSLY !! THANK YOU FOR SHARING, THATS SO BIG!!

I was so confused for a long time and I started using she/they and now thanks to you I know im gender fluid. I was afraid of losing the title of mother , because I do identify as my sons mother but I don't always feel like im fully a girl or boy. you helped me realize im lesbian and not bi and now I know im gender fluid . thank you so much honestly . im a gayby and 30 ive been so confused most of my life. it means so much to me.

I am also pansexual and genderfluid, and hearing you talk about your journey is so affirming. Thank you for sharing!!

thank you so much for this Keara, this has helped me so much!! Before I watched this, I hadn't really questioned my gender but now realising that I'm relating so much to your own experiences, now all the dots are connected and I just feel really comforted, no longer feeling like I'm missing a part of my 'identity'. thank you- ur amazing

Omg! I feel like my life is being validated! Sending you lot of love Keara!

haven’t watched the video yet but bestie i fully needed this today

The audacity to say you don't think that societal standards of gender expression matter but then simultaneously say that in order to feel less like a woman you wear baggy clothes and flatten your breasts, therefore adhering to the same societal standards you claim not to care about. These people will say anything for attention...

genuinely feeling loved & seen rn thank you baby boo

So glad that I found your channel! I watch most of your videos all the time, and you really brighten my day!

This really helped!! I've been struggling with my gender and sexual identity for so long, and I relate so much more to this than most other non-binary experiences. Literally just about everything you said is how I feel, except I think I also reach to the dude end of the spec sometimes too, possibly less so dudette. Thank you for this wonderful video! And I think I'm pan too but not sure :)) FLUUIIIIDDD

Demigirl here! I love that I found this label and I have friends who identify the same way! I love this video and I resonated with so many of your stories. It feels great to see representation!

i really relate to this so much Keira! I've been questioning a lot lately but your videos make me feel better

You're helping me so much. I found your channel this week and I've been falling asleep to you talking and it's helped calm down my night time anxiety. I'm struggling with my gender identity and I always have but when I listen to you talk I feel like there's hope for me to one day maybe be out of the closet.

Kearaaa thank you so much for this video

I was just watching a kpop boy group performance and I realllllly felt like being them or performing with them. I've felt like this a lot. There are many instances where I just get a sudden urge to look more masculine, or androgynous. This state sometimes stretches out for a week or two. Experiences like this have been a thing for me since childhood and finally today at 19, I think I'm certain that I am genderfluid.

thank u for this video keara, im proud of you

This was so validating , helpful and beautiful, thank you so much

school is important but keara is more important

Thank you so much for sharing this video! It helps me as a cis woman (she/her) to understand our world and limited language much better. I'm a teacher and would like to be supportive. I'm trying my best using gender neutral terms like kids, partner and so on. Although that's even more difficult in my language (German), because we gender almost everything. I'm really happy about this video and your courage to share your feelings. The idea with the gender square is amazing! Have a great day!

Keara thank you for being such a ray of sunshine. Your positive vibes are superb.

Thank you so, so much for doing this! You have no idea how much this has helped me! I am questioning my identity, but my thoughts tend to get pushed to the side because of how busy I am. I am worried because I don't feel like the people around me would understand or be excepting. I just have a desire to be completely unrecognizable and change my appearance, but I don't know how, or what this would mean for me. This video gives me hope for a better future! ♥️

Very happy for you that you figured this out! Also welcome as a pansexual (from a fellow pansexual).

You were literally describing how I feel in the gender world and so this really helped me :) thankyouuuuuu

I love your videos so much!!! thank you for sharing your story, your so inspiring and I'm absolutely sure your helping many, many people with this video specifically and your content in general❤️

This helps a lot and your story makes love the word fluid even more !

Aaaaaa Keara I'm so happy for you!!❤ finally a fellow genderfluid person😍 I have non-binary friends that present ~feminine~ and I can imagine that it's not easy being called the right pronoun when presentation and gender is thought to go hand. But as you said: IT DOESN'T!!! You can be a man and present femme, you can be non-binary and present feminine etc! Thank you for sharing❤❤❤

I’m a she, they too! It wasn’t long ago when I figured out I was fluid. All of this is completely relatable.

This is the most relatable thing ever. Honestly I’ve gone through the exact same journey. Thank you so much, I feel so validated ❤

so validating ✨💞 needed this today, feeling very lost and confused as of late

eyyy fellow genderfluid/nonbinary bestie ✌️congrats on finding urself keara 💖

Thanks so much for sharing love ya xx

Yayyyy Im so happy u made this vid Im so proud of you:D

My goodness I love you Keara. You are such a strong and sweet person and I love that you feel okay about opening up about this sort of thing. And honestly your explanations and experiences are very informative and interesting to learn about. Hugs!

hello dear quing, I’m honestly so happy I found your channel all those years ago when we were both still identifying with being bisexual cis women to come to this point where it seems we’ve gone through the same process of coming out all over again to now identify as pansexual genderfluid humans using she/they pronouns. I feel like you’ve been with me in all of these changes! Thanks so much for sharing your story

I‘ve bern questioning my gender a lot over the past few months and, once again, you‘re video helped me and I really relate to your gender identity! Thank you, you‘re the best! 💜

OMG I've never found the words to describe myself, it's so confusing. But you got it, you did it, that's how I feel, that's exactly how I feel THANK YOU SO MUCH It's been ages since I started to study my gender identity and I've never found something that fit But omg that's it... Thank you so much, love you and your content, I've been watching your videos for a while and I just found this one Thanks a lot ❤️❤️

As a demigirl, I relate to all of this so much! I use she/they pronouns, but I prefer they/them most of the time (or for people to use them interchangeably). There are some days where I feel more "feminine" (as I describe it) and I feel like being more "androgynous" on my most dysphoric days. This video was nice to see!

I don't have TIME for an identity crisis

I love it. We need More videos like that ✌🏼✨

I really really appreciate this video and relate with what you've shared! Watching this has made me feel more comfortable with where I am in exploring my own identity, and I thank you so much for that!

Afab, Taurus, genderfluid, pansexual, sapphic, shag hair, brimmed hat, likes some femme things, doesn't need top surgery, "the genderless soul"... are we the same person wtf Also, my favorite thing when I'm upset by bigots is to remind myself that nobody can be attracted to me and be straight. So take that, cat callers.

I'm genderfluid and this representation means so much to me!!! Thank you so much ily

so proud of u

HELPP I LITERALLY WATCHED YOUR VIDEOS BEFORE I EVEN DISCOVERED MYSELF SO SEEING THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY ahh

I am also nonbinary/genderfluid. I had wanted a pixie cut for years before I finally did it a few months ago. There are a few days when I want longer hair, but I cannot tell you how gender-affirming it was when I cut my hair. On more feminine days, I go hyper-feminine with my clothes and the haircut still feels gender-affirming. Then, on more agender/masculine/other days, it makes so much of a difference in how I feel! Obviously, do whatever is going to feel comfortable for you, but I figured I would share my experience because it might be helpful to hear from others who have gone through with it. :)

EARLYYY AND I'M ALSO GENDERFLUID!!!

this! makes! me! feel! so! seen! thanks for talking through this with us!!!!!

thank you for sharing your story, it really helped me to hear it and i feel less alone

I had the same feelings about the label of demigirl!! I actually stopped using pansexual several years ago for the same reason of not wanting to explain myself, and bisexual also felt comfy. Thank you for being a positive representation for sexuality and gender diversity!! 💜💜