How sweet!

That actually makes me a little sad. If your lovely behaviour towards them was so strange for them, it really shows what kind of reactions they ususally get 😔Happy though, that they had you!

Teachers like you are a true Godsend, as one of the kids that was often yelled at or punished without getting why myself. We need more of y’all! Not just cause natural born conditions but also a lot of traumatized kids need compassionate safe teachers that encourage em. Can’t ever build anyone up with tear downs ❤

Your comment got me right in the feels @jerrihadding2534 🖤

Hello Jessica! (waves animatedly) Have you looked into Prolotherapy? I don't know if anyone does this type of therapy in the UK. It seems to help EDS/ POTS/migraine people. The doctor over here that does it seems to be this guy, kzfaq.info/get/bejne/f92UjZmlq6ubm5s.html I don't work for them or anything but just wanted you to know some people can help with EDS. Just found out about this treatment myself and it has made a huge difference.

Captions are great, big props to the person who did the transcription, it's hard work :)

That's how I convinced myself to call my doctor to get diagnosed medically. Seeing things on social media was validating--knowing it wasn't just because I'm "weird"--and very helpful for getting the care I deserve.

Omg same here! I literally did not understand when in highschool my friends would talk about sex like it wasn't gross and I never understood that when you call someone hot that most people don't think of it in an aesthetic way but in a sexual attraction way and I never knew there was a difference.

Oh hey, me too!! My last 5 years or so have been having this identity realisation moment that I'm both not what I assumed AND there was a community of people like me, a solid 3-4 times. Each time adding another A to a fittingly phrased identity label, of basically, AAAA

I believe I fall under the category of demisexual, so when I hear people talk about being sexually attracted to a stranger or viewing adult videos regularly, it feels very jarring, which is the best way I can describe it.

Same on both accounts. 🙌❤

I recognised that, of being so used to masking that i was fooling myself. I got my diagnosis of being autistic at 58 and it was such a relief though i was asking myself at age 25 if i was autistic because i could lose myself so much in focussing deeply on a task that when someone interrupted me i felt as if they slapped me and it irritaties the hell out of me. I am def autistic but the kind of person that can look people in their eyes and can show empathy easily. But i also suspect now that i have also ADHD. These two often go together.

I had a very similar experience where I did a school project on children with disabilities and when I learned about autism, was like ‘oh wait… that’s me’

@@lalaillustrator6295 I wrote a whole honors thesis about best practices for employing autistic adults and still managed to be like "Oh wow it's so cool how well I can relate to this population that I'm super passionate about helping for no reason in particular."

@@the.jamie.turnerloool thats actually hilarious

​@@niencatthey often go hand in hand. My son is both.

Now I'm picturing an infomercial, the kind where they talk really fast and tell you "but wait! There's more! You don't just get the physical disabilities, not just the mental issues, for a limited time now we'll throw in food intolerance and rampant flatulence for FREE! But act now because this deal won't last!" 😂 I feel you on the comorbidities. Your comment made me laugh.

@@bossyboots5000 haha 🤣 totally!

I got the two for one special, too. So much fun, not.

Hahaha! Loved your opening line 😂😂😂

Gotta catch them all! 😅

this is a great point! no matter much how much you connect with a creator, we are all individuals and all are symptoms are going to be different in some way!

Yes! Even trained and certified professionals have biases, and gaps in their knowledge about things. Ideally people are aware of their gaps, and can say "I don't know...". Also, neurodiversities have "spiky profiles", and symptoms/traits are generally better described as "significantly different than peers" because they can be either "advanced OR deficit", and some traits for an individual will likely be advanced, while others deficit. Such as "hyperlinguistic or hypolinguistic". And also remember, that if the traits/symptoms are being described from an outside perspective rather than what a person experiences in their own brain - can have drastically different interpretations.

Plus people have different experiences with adhd! There are many different experiences

I like that, since it also fits the hyperfocus side of ADHD, and is a much better description of what it feels like from the inside.

I like that. Like ADHD is not about a lack of attention, it's about a lack of attention *regulation.* I think the "attention deficit" part makes some people think we just don't pay attention, and then when they see us paying attention to something, especially with hyperfocus, they think we just don't want to pay attention because "Well you can pay attention to [insert high dopamine activity here]".

They've also been fined nearly $8mil by the FTC for violating privacy regulations and abusing their users' data in the name of profit and advertising

People have been saying things the last couple of BetterHelp sponsorships (I know this is the 3rd or 4th that I have commented on). I looked through their FAQ's and they only talk about helping stress, anxiety, relationships, parenting, depression, addictions, eating, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflicts, LGBT matters, grief, religion, self esteem, and more. That does seem like it is the easy to treat/manage mental health issues in the scheme of things (not saying that they can't be debilitating just there is a big difference between treating someone for anxiety and if they are having psychosis for example). In the past they have gotten into trouble for saying that their therapists are licenced (it turned out that some of them weren't) but then saying that it is up to you to verify that for yourself as they are only a platform not their employer. They have also in the past sold any data that they can that doesn't violate HIPAA (or the equivalent in your country). Those things don't even touch on the bad experiences that people have had with them or the fact that if a creator is critical of them they will send a cease and desist letter to them.

I appreciate this thread. I by no means want to create any hardship or shame for Jessica. Better Help is quite problematic in more ways than is mentioned here. It's just useful to know that they are problematic and of course everyone is entitled to make their own decisions and assessments.

Thank you for commenting this, it's been a sad seeing so many youtubers getting sponsored by them lately because only about half a decade ago they were rightly attacked for false advertising at the time (pretty sure a big KZfaqr at the time promoted them and a lot of people had bad experiences with better health as a result). I hope Jessica (or anyone connected to her) see's this comment and, refuse's to accept better health sponsorships for future videos, but for now I hope people watching find this comment (or better, do research) before jumping into trying better health.

Yep, I'm in the US and I had a psychiatrist tell me I couldn't have ADHD because I'd graduated from high school- without even checking first that I actually did. Like I did, but he just straight up assumed. Ugh.

This is exactly it. It's like having a pain somewhere in your body. To be told there's nothing wrong sucks because you're still in pain. To get a diagnosis, to get a reason, is so relieving and validating.

Even good and caring parents can unknowingly do things that are counterhelpful for their child, when assuming a neurotypical kid - who is in fact neuroatypical (with adhd or autism mostly - I assume Tourette gets more easily diagnosed, though I don't actually know). Especially as kids can be awfully good at masking unknowingly, and mask even with their own family - and they learn their own expectations from people around them. Which may not fit their personal situation at all.

I think one of the things most people who ask "Why does a diagnosis matter?" don't understand is that you already have the thing and the diagnosis is just telling you why something is more difficult, challenging or complicated for you. It doesn't matter if it's ADHD or asthma. Someone with asthma doesn't struggle to breathe when they run because they are out of shape, they struggle to breathe when they run because their lungs don't work the same way. It's the same for ADHD, our brains don't work the same way.

@@annikan42 ouch... this is too real

Same friend 😊

It is interesting how medications effect people differently. My daughter was diagnosed in college and the ADHD medication triggered terrible anxiety. She had to come off of the meds, get on anti-anxiety meds, build up to the right level, get back on ADHD meds, then change the doses of each until they found the right mix. It took months, and her emotions were all over the place, but she said she would not have been able to finish college without them.

Similar story! I got an ADHD dx at 43 years of age. I have had just about every mood/anxiety dx throughout my life and only after starting stimulant medication have a truly felt better. Decades of meds that only helped a little and talk therapy that made me feel worse… being labeled with Borderline (I have no lingering symptoms after taking my stimulant meds)… being an excellent student probably kept me from getting a proper diagnosis and treatment at a younger age. My life was torturous at times and now I can handle things so much better.

@@IgnacioCheese ❤️

@@IgnacioCheese A big thing the diagnostic people mentioned to me (also late dx here) was that in my case, they said I had both ADHD and anxiety, but they weren't sure what was "first". Was my anxiety a thing first with ADHD just on top of that, or did I have anxiety BECAUSE of the (untreated) ADHD? So this kind of makes a lot of sense to me actually. Having a co-morbidity, especially anxiety, I can easily imagine that treating something like ADHD can make the other thing better. Specifically attention and focus issues, in a social setting, I can actually remember things people say, not space out and seem like I am disinterested etc. Ironically, I was also diagnosed with borderline as a kid hahaha But I really hope with more people talking about it, more diverse research will be done so that less people will go missed. Since I had my dx just this year, I still really struggle knowing that my whole life up until now could have been easier or at least, I could have found an actual path to go down if I had known....

That would be the best collab.

❤

Same. I have no diagnosis, but at 49 and enough ability to see what it is, I have no doubt. Wishing you hope in your journey ❤

@@karenpaxton I wish you the same, thank you 🥺💕

same! and one of my parents got diagnosed with autism at 60!! it’s hard to not imagine what could have been but we know now and we have so much time to enjoy!

Too many Jessicas? Or exactly the correct amount

I just remembered, my younger sibling (8 years younger) had these books when they were little, "You Read To Me, I'll Read To You"! Something about no day being the same reminded me

Yes i love how structured her videos are and how clear they are. She is wonderful and her videos helped me a lot to self diagnose as adhd.

And her name is also Jessica😂

​@@niencat Jessica² 😂

I’m not saying this will happen for you but my bipolar diagnosis got removed because my adhd (and recently diagnosed pmdd) symptoms actually properly explained what was happening and the doctors i saw just defaulted to bipolar cos i was a young woman struggling with spending and moods. I wish you love, luck and support on your journey!

They often go hand in hand. I am both bipolar and ADHD.

@@adammackenroth2864 that is true! but women where i am from are over diagnosed with bipolar just because it’s easier for the doctor. i don’t want to dismiss or minimise! just it’s a thing that people should be aware of especially cos it is so hard to push to get a diagnosis looked into or turned over.

I have been in and out of therapy for my chronic depression since my first attacks of deep depression and panic attacks at age 21. The therapies i could get with my kind of insurance were standard and did not help. Also i had to learn how to describe what happened inside of me when i am in the midst of an attack (depression and panic. tracks and anxiety). Because i am thinking in feelings and images and associations and at those moments of the attack i am so overwhelmed by feeling that i cant find the words. Many autistic people have this. Some autistic children and people experience so many layers and levels of feelings, inner images and associations all at once that it is impossible to name them. And sometimes we forget what they are called and sometimes we dont know what the difference is. I had to learn how a feeling or emotion or a inner experience was called. That took me years. Then at 55 i started to write scripts for each therapy sessions and also the diagnosis of autism helped with getting there right type of therapy. I found that systemic therapy helped me more than cognitive therapy. More is known about neurodiverent brains nowadays then when i was 21, or 30 or 40 and here in the Netherlands i find that the regular psychotherapists are much more aware that people might be neurodivergent. I do have chronic depression but never understood why. When i got the diagnosis of autism i understood much better how hard i had to work to be able to work in a job 38 or 40 hours a week and could not do a course to improve my career options next to working full time. Before that i went along with what my family thought, that i lacked backbone and was lazy. Although deep inside me i felt this was not true and also that my real self is a positive, can do person instead of a depressed person. I never felt i was different than other peoplwle but other people often did not understand me and did think i was weird. Whereas to me they were without common sense, playing very loud music, going to places where there was much noise and many many people, getting drunk or.stoned and sleeping in after staying up most of the weekend, missing the lovely beauty of the early morning light. I could make more sense of these differences. I begin to see now more and more my masking, how and what i mask, even for myself and masking is sometimes necessary and i am glad i learned from a young age to mask. These techniques made my life when interacting with others a bit easier. I am now declared disabled, since 2018, but every year i have to be assessed again. I dont think i can ever work for money again. I have been so stressed most of my childhood and also my whole adult life that my body protests in so many ways when i feel the slightest bit of stress. I am glad for the wonderful welfare system we have still here in the Netherlands but the intolerance for people who are chronically sick, esp when these chronic illnesses are mental illnesses, is growing here just like in many countries. I was too strict and too demanding for and of myself before my diagnosis. I understand myself and what i need to feel better and make my life run more smoothly. I also understand how i can interact with others better. But my emotions still run away with me and that can make interactions with others difficult. I am still learning in that respect. It is interesting. It is a journey. But we are all on a journey, esp in these very uncertain times with all the chaos in climate, many people migrating, advancing technologies that can have very scary consequences, and old structures like capitalism and conservatism falling apart and questions like what is or is not.gender, what does sex have tondomwith the attachment we call love etc.

The extra struggle of caring for yourself when you have adhd and chronic illness is so real

She has dyslexia she's talked about it years ago in some of her videos.

Or work. My sense of time is very off. I think I'm on time with a task, turns out I'm spending two or three times longer on it than most people.

@@kents.2866I had an employee with ADHD. Some of her projects had hard deadlines that absolutely could not be missed. When I would give her those projects, the calendar came out and we worked back the days so she could visually see how much time she had to work on it and why. She would then set her schedule and we would agree on when I would check on her progress. It did take more planning on both our parts, but she was very good at her job and amazingly creative. The final result was always better than what I envisioned. We just needed to work out a process that worked for all of us.

Same, same, same!

And honestly one of the most boring things is waiting about for medication and stuff - my follow up isn't for another 8 days and I'm going insane

🥰

Jessica, just wanted to say thank you. You are so relatable.

And for us who are both autistic and ADHDers, AuDHDer or AutDHDer

That sucks!!

​@@jennifers5560but is also kind of hilarious 😅

@@DestructionGlitter lol! So glad you found humor in it. I think I would be looking around for the phone thinking I left it at home!

​​@@jennifers5560gosh, this must have been like 2008, I was in my early 20s and didn't even know I had ADHD yet. So yeah, looking back, it's super funny. It wasn't so funny in the moment. I thought someone else in the office had taken in, but it was 11pm and it was just me and another girl from another department. She said she'd buzzed someone in thinking he must be there for one of us... she might have ADHD as well 🤣

@@DestructionGlitter lol!

and eds! the overlap between autism, adhd, pots, and eds is practically a circle lol

(obviously another assessment/diagnosis could be really overwhelming and of course there's no pressure from anyone)

​@kate1021 Also, allergies, asthma, digestive problems, and migraines go on that list. It's almost as if connective tissue is everywhere in the body, and it being messed up messes other things up (which Jessica talked about as cogs). Signed: allergic, asthmatic, autistic, dyslexic, gluten and milk intolerant, hypermobile & brittle tendon suffering, ADHDer and migraineur with SAD and C-PTSD