One of the few Christmas songs to include the lyrics "no survivors".

As if the song isn't bad and great enough, Dad RINGS the doorbell, instead of walk in, like a normal parent does to their own home !!

The restraint shown by the entire 70s, 80s, and 90s to not make a 40 minute animated feature of this song is something to marvel over

Message of this song: forget the poor deceased victims on the bus and their families, daddy just give us our friggin' presents now!

At first I thought "Yeah this isn’t the worst Christmas song but then when the horn started with chaos ensuing I was like "Oh...ok" Then I started dying laughing.

"It's gonna be a real old-fashioned christmas for my children, their daddy, and me," but not for all those people on the bus that just died and their grieving families! Merry Christmas everyone!

I just keep dying at “a bulletin has just been handed me”

Whoever decided to make the horn barely outside of the key of jingle bells deserves a Grammy

I love how the son wasn't even worried about anything important he just wanted toys 😂

Here from TikTok lol. Wasn’t disappointed

Nothing says 'Merry Christmas' like a horrible tragedy!

I love the way the melody gets a little dissonant when the family thinks their father has been slain.

i heard this and was dying laughing, then the “no survivors” part came and i lost it

Who do I have to talk to get this on Spotify because I need to add it to my holiday playlist? It's unhinged.

this is one of the most insane things i've ever heard

I thought nothing could ever be worse than The Christmas Shoes, but this pulls it off

Hey, screw those other dads. Let their wives write their own songs...Ms. Bennett is HAPPY.

Surely there has to be some intern or disgruntled on-air person out there somewhere who could swap this for "All I Want for Christmas is You" in the rotation at like 2AM and see how many passes it takes until people catch on.

This is like a Black Mirror episode in audio form

This song about to blow up

I can't be the only person who thinks this song is absolutely hilarious

For the past three years I have been listening to this song and sharing it on my social networks every Christmas. It is my favorite Worst Christmas Song, since hearing it on The Mark & Lynda Podcast.

This song is unhinged and I am here for it!

How is it that there are only 60k views for the GREATEST CHRISTMAS STORY EVER TOLD?!? And only 315 Likes? This is a slap in the face of the Yuletide Music Industrial Complex and should be a wake-up for all of America!

Who came from TikTok?? 😂

I still can’t believe this was written and produced by the same guy that did “Home for the Holidays”. Knowing Perry Como has a sick sense of humor makes me respect him even more now.

“Oh My God this just can’t happen!” I thought she was going to have a mental break down and off the whole family

Why the fuck is the dad ringing the doorbell at his own? Goddamn home

My Daddy missed the bus and froze on the way home. The old fashioned way to die.

This makes the Christmas shoes look like Rudolph, the Red Nose Reindeer. What kind of Christmas song has the line "no survivors"? A whole bus of people die, but that's okay, Daddy's home with presents.

Why? After so many years, am I just now hearing about this song? This is my new Christmas Classic. Wonder if we can request it on the radio...Also, has anyone found it on spotify yet?

Adult Swim energy in 1975, amazing

Best Christmas song ever. Possibly best song ever.

This is amazing. At 3:11, when she responds to the report, I almost had to pull my car over. Thanks, Adam and Gina, and I guess Mark in the Morning, whoever you are.

I just got the vinyl single of this just like the one pictured. Thrilled to finally add it to my vinyl Christmas collection. It’s also featured on the “They Killed Christmas” compilation album.

Tiktok was right, it's like something from SNL 😭💀

An Old Fashioned No Survivors Christmas🎄

This is one of the darkest songs I have ever heard….I mean JESUS CHRIST! This lady was about to end it all, probably with her own children the second she thought she’d become a widow. And that fucking kid only thinking about toys and shit… And the kicker of it all was the “No survivors” line on a Fucking Christmas song! I mean holy shit….what a rollercoaster!

It won't be "An Old Fashioned Christmas" for the poor bastards on that bus.

The Ralph Report brought me here

this is the worst. a roller coaster of emotion!

Sorrows, sorrows. Prayers.

Is mom contemplating to off herself ? Priceless!

I’ve heard this before but thought it was a fever dream 🥴

Anyone else here because of TikTok?

This is what happens when Mob money is used to produce a Christmas recording.

This is my favorite Christmas song.

why did he ring the doorbell to his own house and forget all the other burning people because dad's here and what about her children to look forward to

This feels it would have been on TGS from 30 Rock 😭😭

R.I.P. Paul Vance. Thank You for writing such gems as "Run, Joey, Run", "Playground In My Mind", and this song which many consider to be The WORST Christmas song of all Time!

Surely this song had to be the creation of someone who had too much eggnog one Christmas and thought, “hey I’ll write a song about a bus crash with no survivors and a woman and her kids thinking her husband was on it, but he miraculously shows up with presents.”. Someone actually thought that was a good idea.

This... it's the funniest fucking song I've ever heard. I was praying the doorbell was going to be a cop telling them he died

How did dad get home? He missed the death-bus...

Daddy sounds like George Costanza.

Any KRTY listeners heard this on Gary and Julie's show

The kids don’t even care that they’re father just died, they just care about not getting presents. 😂

this was a thing in the 50s too, there was one about an alien landing and the songs kept changing the reflect what information was being released about the aliens

WHO THE FUCK GREEN LIT THIS SONG?!

I am so happy to say that this is my first & last time listening to this in my 60 years. I'm groaning/laughing/wincing/rolling my eyes, too much awfulness.

I’m impressed they haven’t made an Adult Swim sketch out of this song

I love a song with a happy ending.

Heard on Carolla. Laughed my ass off. This is the best Christmas song ever.

this song is a greys anatomy episode

This song is traumatizing by today’s standards. I need therapy money for Christmas.

OH MY GOD???

I am laughing my ass off! you gotta be kidding me

"What have i got left in life to look forward to?" she asks with at least two children present

Im so glad tik tok brought me here. Worth it 😂

The message: Screw all those people on the bus

Just heard Linda Bennett interviewed about it on Alan Colmes' radio show!

KTSA in San Antonio, Texas brought me here, thank God it wasn't the bus company that was in operation from New Haven, Connecticut.

Duddy brought me here 😂😂

RIP to everybody on that bus I guess lmaooo

This reminds me of the old Christmas song I heard once where a family made a snowman, and the snowman loved them, and then one night the wreath on their door caught fire, and the snowman somehow? Moved over and put it out, but melted in the process. The snowman killed itself to save the family. This song beats that one.

…”and there were no survivors.” WTF!!

heard this on The Adam Carolla show....this song is detestable.

Has anybody heard the other side of this record? It’s a song called Daddy Cursed the Day, and now I need to hear if it’s a sequel or prequel, haha. I can’t seem to find it anywhere to listen to.

I was like “nah that ain’t dad, they tryna trick us”… AND THE IT WAS???

This is the most unhinged thing I’ve ever heard 😂😂😂

Houston radio station KRBE 104.1MHz was playing parts of this song right now and everyone at the studio laughing so hard. 😂😂

Thank you wplr for finding this lost gem😂😂😂

I’m literally crying what is this 😭😭😭😭

You just know that somebody in that family, the alcoholic, tranquilizer abusing mom, or the daughter, was glad that Daddy wasn't coming home. Then he ruined everything.

Cue Krusty the Clown meme: “What the hell was that?”

Move over Oh Holy Night. This is the one.

Worse part is that the family had already divided up ol' dead daddy's presents!!😂😅

XPN brought me here 😂

That was a freaking roller coaster. 😂

I don't understand the point of this song. "Yay! It's Christmas and Daddy is coming home from work!" "Oh no! Daddy's bus crashed!" "Sob sob! Daddy's dead!" "lol jk"

I dont think we'll be hearing this on iHeartRadio's holiday stations anytime soon

Why does it play a riff from "Here Comes the Sun"???

Anyone else here "Here Comes the Sun" in the beginning???

At first I thought it was gonna be a spinoff of the Beatles…here comes the sun. Instead I got here comes darkness and death. 😂

I'll never forget when my teacher played this song.

Gobsmacked that none of these comments mention that this is the plot of The Waltons Christmas. If you loved this and haven’t given it a watch, do yourself a favor and go watch it 😂

A local radio station DJ was talking about this song and he surmised that the father had a side piece and she became pregnant. She wanted him to leave his wife and marry her, but he still loved his first wife. He missed the bus on purpose and cut the brake lines. He further added I can see the scene in the songwriting room. Everyone wanted to know why the goth chick was in there now we know. 😆

notice the record is not for sale, who would by it????

Hilarious 😂 We laughed so hard 🤣

@shoe478 How is it a happy ending when a busload of people are killed? I know it's just a story, but I hear this glurge all the time. Someone who missed bus thinks a god spared him while everyone else died. What about those other people? Did god hate all of them? Even the children among them? How simple minded can people be? Does the writer of this song imagine that everyone on that bus had angered god in some way, so it was okay that they all be killed, just as long as Daddy got home all right?

You know, I can see this being made in the mid-'60s, along with "Leader of the Pack", "Last Kiss", and other tragedy songs that were weirdly popular then. But 1975? Seriously?