Dude that describes me perfectly. Better to be a complete ass hole and beat the shit out of everyone ( can't bring myself to do it though)😍

An awful thing called codependency can sneak in and mess us up lots!!

you have just described what is pejoratively referred to as 'codependency', a product of conditional or negligent parenting and care by your primary caregivers. being utterly dependent, this causes dissociation from your true self to get your infantile needs met by putting theirs first. depression and other mh conditions are a result of this developmental dysfunction and trauma. that was not your fault. you were not given the unconditional love in a home that is a safe place to fail that all children deserve. that is your actual starting point towards a full recovery. 🙏

give me a thumbs up if this resonates with you. you may have heard of 'codependency', a product of conditional or negligent parenting and care by your primary caregivers. being utterly dependent, this causes dissociation from your true self to get your infantile needs met by putting theirs first. depression and other mh conditions are a result of this developmental dysfunction and trauma including autism. that was not your fault. you were not given the unconditional love in a home that is a safe place to fail that all children deserve. that is your actual starting point towards a full recovery. 🙏

@inhale.exhale.2527 Yes, a thumbs up. I mentioned codependency one month ago in the thread already.

Exactly. Depression is a mental illness. There's nothing "ill" about being unhappy with an unfulfilling life. In fact, it's an entirely healthy and necessary response.

That's actually a very important thing. To oversimplify it: You're not depressed if you're unhappy for a reason. But still medication can help, even if not depressed. Like a painkiller is useful, even though you need to get your broken leg fixed.

good that your counsellor said that, a good one perhaps

Good man, that bloke.

If you had won the lottery, or had your side hustle/business grow to millions of dollars; within 2 days, all of your symptoms of depression would disappear. You would get a private chef to cook you healthy food, you would have so much time to exercise, and you would feel confident to talk any beautiful lady. Think of that, you are only 48 hours away from being happy for the rest of your life.

I second that!👍

Absolutely agree. I venture to say that the world is a better place with people like Max in it.

Well said.

Gotta shout at the devil. ,)

You and me both pal, I'd left this one bookmarked for far too long, being a guy that has always dealt with my mental state cold turkey, I'm only recently thinking of speaking to a professional. It seemed like a bit of a daunting task to hear about a subect I can consider 'personal' from someone I (in some small way parasocially) admire. As with a lot of his videos, our man Max puts them into words in a way that makes them both in depth and easy to hear, without watering down the subject.

same here, wise words, applicable for me, and far too many others

Yep I’ve had moments I could have addressed to the doctor,, but I realised that it’s only me that can address why I feel low, what made me feel this way etc. only then, once I’m true to myself, can I pick myself up and deal with it, talk to someone about it. Put it to bed then see life’s to short to let emotions usually caused by others ruin your life…. Reevaluate what’s important and your passionate about and go after it 100% xx

You have my sympathies. My first wife was put on Prozac back in the '90s. Changed her, from a competent, intelligent woman with some issues to an angry, nasty person. I didn't see it at the time, too close. We divorced, acrimoniously. Thirty years later I can look back and see the harm that drug did (although I first realised this probably 15 years ago ).

The problem is you can't fix the underlying problem if it's a life event that has devastated you .for some meds are the only answer.

quit venlafaxine my second time over a month ago, i'm sure you'll manage eventually. but doing exercise is mandatory

Different medication but I had awful withdrawals from amitriptyline. Was trying to taper off for months with terrible nausea and ‘brain lightning’, basically small seizures. Going tee total and stopping completely over night kicked in those withdrawals very quickly! Can’t recommend for everyone but worked for me.

Use 5htp or niacin/nicotinamide for withdrawal. Also thiamine and riboflavin and vitb5 and b12 etc. Also vit c and magnesium in masses.

Similar to me/us! Getting our own fixer-upper home has been a life-saver. How to get off the treadmill of the rat-race, tho’? Still haven’t managed that…

Your comments re: outside project, fresh air and getting back into shape I believe is spot on. Good luck.

Iv also been on venlafaxine for 10 years or so. When you say you want to come off it to see if you still have emotions left it sounds like I felt in the past. I do now feel genuinely content for the most part but still get the numbness sometimes. Maybe the numbness reduces as we heal? I don’t know much about the complexities of these things other than my own experiences but just thought I’d put in my 2p worth. Good luck to you sir. I hope you’re journey to contented ness isn’t too much longer. All the best.

You don't have to persuade your doctor to come of anything,the choice is yours and entirely up to you.Afrer my life had been destroyed by doctors and psychiatrists from the age of 14 ,when l was prescribed the sleeping tablet Mandrax,later banned by the Goverment,and Stelazine.These drugs caused depression,later l was sent to a psychiatrist to help me get off the Mandrax ,this was back in the early seventies,who used me as a lab rat and gave me ever increasing quantities of all classes of psychotropic medication ,which completely screwed me up ,leading to 54 years on this kind of medication,both the old and the new ,being sectioned multiple times,admission into 5 different mental hospitals ,including 2 of the old asylums,so many overdoses and other suicide attempts that l have lost count,various diagnoses,including, psychotic depression,schizoaffective disorder,Paranoid Schizophrenia,along with a couple of personality disorders ,for good measure.It was the drugs that were causing my symptoms,and making me suicidal.10 years ago,a psychiatric nurse came to give me a depot antipsychotic depression,she told me that she was leaving the job,and l think what she told me next altered the course of my life,for the better.She said that l might not be mentally ill,but it could be the effects of the drugs.This was the first time any medical proffessional had told me that,they had always told me that l needed this poison,and l was often forced to take it.l thought about what this nurse had said,and because by then l was disabled,housebound ,with several health conditions,and in chronic pain,caused by decades of this medication, I made the decision to gradually wean myself off.I told my doctor what l was going to do,read books by American psychiatrist Dr Peter Breggin,on how to withdraw safely ,and began my journey back to better health.This was entirely my choice,and l did it completely by myself,without any help from any doctor,and although the withdrawals were often bad,and in fact l was sectioned twice again,because my doctor didn't understand that my brain was slowly adapting to less and less of the drugs,and 8 years later l was finally free from the grip of these drugs,and had completely escaped what l call The Mental Health Trap.Now,l feel alive ,my mental health never better,my only regret that a big chunk of my life was wasted.Each day now l am thankful to be alive,although l am left with much pain and suffering.l am now 71 ,and if l can do this,anyone can.

Very well said.👍

Mate it’s not gay to hug someone

@@Gnasherism what if you are both nude?

What has being heterosexual or not got to do with hugging somebody?

@@catabaticanabatic3800 well exactly. That’s why I thought it was strange that you felt the need to state that you’re straight. That’s all

@@jtothew4201 just bromance! Haha

Facts

I will never take a pharmaceutical antidepressant after my experience with anti psychotics. I will consider trying St john's wort though. It just seems like drugs derived from plants growing in the ground allways seem to be much less detrimental when it comes to the brain being irreversibly rewired.

Good luck to you Gary, don’t be afraid to try something completely different for a job, I’ve surprised myself in the last couple of years!

I wouldn't necessarily rule out medication, it can be very helpful to get you out of a rut, and suits some people better than other. Definitely dont be afraid of councelling or psychotherapy either.

An hour daily walk will do more for you than anything the doctor can give you.

@@ragebait988 thats very reductive and simplistic. If you are in the throws of a mental health crisis, simply leaving the house can be a huge hurdle.

I’d love to know what part of the uk you have worked as a mental health professional if you are in uk? In the south east of England and I assumed it’s the same all over GP appointments are hard to get, short and far too rushed to even scratch the surface of a patients problem. If you are lucky enough to be referred to a councillor or a member of the mental health team you are already talking about being discharged before even getting close to a diagnosis. GP’s are caring and mainly want to help but they are over subscribed. A prescription is really there only option to help fast. The mental health service is only accessible to those in Crisis. So sad as like Max says you really need to act at the point of feeling irrational. The window he describes is very accurate. That’s when it would be great to access the team. Gp’s sadly get a lot of stick but they really stand no chance in our system of delivering half the help they’d like. Thinking tonight of everyone who’s suffering!