Just want to point out that some of the common symptoms in girls/women can be masked by other things like anxiety, autism (which often co-occurs with ADHD!), trauma response/CPTSD, speech or developmental disorders or even just differing personalities. So, for example, instead of getting the comments about being chatty/talking too much on my report cards, I got comments like I was very smart but it was very difficult to get me to participate or speak up in class. ...Which was actually a massive understatement! I sometimes went days on end without saying a single word in class! I would then come home and either talk my mom/sisters' ears off or have a big emotional meltdown because I was exhausted from holding it together all day at school. There would sometimes be comments about me daydreaming/spacing out and had difficulty keeping track of assignments and deadlines as I got older, but otherwise teachers would compliment me for being the "model student" for being quiet and doing my work without ever interrupting or causing trouble. It actually makes me sad to think that the same thing that was hurting me socially was being praised by teachers because it was convenient for them 🥺 but of course I don't blame them for not knowing. This was the 90s and people were even less aware than now about girls with ADHD (and especially AuDHD which is notoriously difficult to recognize because autism and ADHD traits often mask each other). Anyway, super long story just to say that ADHD can have drastically different presentations from the outside, so it's really important to focus on the internal experiences, such as difficulties with emotional regulation, attention *regulation* (such as hyperfocus OR mind wandering), and executive dysfunction.

Spot on for me and even some of my siblings, growing up in the 60s and 70s no one had ADHD on their radar and even if they did there was no way they would admit their child wasn't "normal" It was hard times being chastised and even punished for being different. As an adult I embrace my differences and strive to adapt my environment to meet my needs. Much thanks to Robyn and Katy for paving the way to acceptance and understanding.

I also sought a diagnosis during the pandemic. Surprise, surprise, mine is not ADHD but I’m on the Spectrum instead! It makes perfect sense to me and I’m much more comfortable in my own skin. :) I’ve let my new colleagues know and I’ve been met with nothing but kindness. I love my new school! :)

Spot on. I think I have some traits of ADHD. Other people's clutter or laziness drives me insane.

In my generation, I don’t think ADHD was even a thing. When I look back, I was probably a classic case. I only feel this way after raising my 4th child who was diagnosed with acute ADHD. Learning more about ADHD, I realized that my first two older children had it too. The second daughter, I struggled with her with an undiagnosed learning disorder and other symptoms. The last, a boy was acute and also had acute ODD. He was on maximum meds, but by the end of the day they wore off. Let’s just say, I could write a book!!! As to myself, born in the ‘40’s, in my early grades, I was a stand out student. Later grades I still expected myself to be smart in school and excel…. But that wasn’t the case, focus became more difficult. Math and science seemed okay, but things like history, languages made no sense to me. I still cannot remember names and dates. I can’t remember sequences of numbers. My work life followed, with my expectation of my self and my job performance not matching. In addition I was a single working mother with no other financial or other support. I thought I could do everything, and I did do everything. I did the best I could. My children are all grown up, the oldest is 53, the youngest 25. As I reflect on my own experience, I can understand that I was not failing, I was struggling. Today at 75, retired, I see myself hyper focused on things and projects, work until the wee hours, difficult to walk past my project without sitting down at it, hours pass, forget to eat, etc. even friends point this out to me. In addition, as many things as I have done and do, when in a social setting, I have difficulty participating in conversations. I feel I have nothing to contribute, feel inadequate and/or invisible. I wish there was some way to fix me….. but actually, it’s too late career wise, I am happy doing art and staying up way too late on KZfaq. Thanks for allowing me to share.

This interview was spot on! Thank you…I so relate to the struggles and am in the process of downsizing and minimizing.

❤

Too many ads at the beginning 😭