It breaks my heart that you went through this Kayli. You are so beautiful inside and out. Out of all the Shaytards, you were instantly my favourite not just because of your natural beauty, but because your kindness and heart was instantly apparent. I look up to you so much and I had no idea you went through this until today. You are such an inspiration. I send so much love your way.

Rewatching this still brings tears to my eyes. I remember watching this for the first time. I was 13 back then and I recognized the first part of your story. I remember the pain that I felt back then and doing the exact same thing as you did in your health class. I could see the pain the it had brought to you, but I could not hear anything but a solution in it. I promised myself to lose ten pounds and went way beyond that, but here I am today. I am now rewatching this and trying to see it from a different aspect. I now feel like I actually get your story and I want to promise myself to stop hurting myself, but I do not feel like I can.

Kayli, this video made me cry. I don't have an eating disorder but I've always struggled with my body image and liking myself. It's always been hard for me to feel comfortable in my own skin. And I just want you to know that you are beautiful and anybody out there who is struggling with an eating disorder or liking themselves, whatever it may be, this is a tough time but you will get through. We all need to love one another and be the shoulder to cry on and support each other.

i have thought off starving myself but i am so happy to hear i am not the only one. i feel encouraged to stop now

I don't know if what I went though was an eating disorder but I was defiantly depressed and would just think to myself "if I just looked better I would feel better" and I would just not eat for days to the point that I would be passing out. But the strange part was that I remember being mad at my parents for not noticing (both parents worked long hours) and even though I was the one lying and saying I had eaten I would get angry at them for not seeing though my lies or seeing that I was depressed.

You are an amazing mom and you are so beautiful. Stay strong.

I am SO proud of you. I love how you are now open minded than ever before. You will keep growing and the journey will be great for you. :) Brailee and Gage are so LUCKY and FORTUNATE to have parents like you and Casey. ^3^

You are such a beautiful person Kayli inside and out ! I Love You and your family so much ! Don't change stay as You are 💕💕💕 Love from France

@HeyKayli WOW I cant imagine what you are going through but you are beautiful and a strong women! I found out that I diagnosed with Anxiety in 2015! I got sick every morning, cried, lost 10 pounds, did not leave my house for 2 weeks, didn't even leave my bed unless i went to the bathroom. I slept, and missed school for two weeks as well. I was so nervous to go back to school that day i went back to! You inspire me! I look up to you and i hope you respond to this because I have you as my role model! Stay strong!!!

I was looking for a lasagna recipe....I went to your page because you just seemed so sweet. You are without question, beautiful. I am sorry it is hard for you to see that. It is hard for so many woman to love themselves. I too struggle(d) with an eating disorder. It is important that you realize you are beautiful (but I know this takes time). We spend too much of our lives seeing ourselves through eyes that do not see right (where we can see the beauty in others but not in ourselves). Beauty is found in so many forms. I think it is terrible when I hear women bashing themselves, feeling guilty...........for eating. God bless you and your family and I wish you nothing but the best!

kayli, my subscription box said this was an upload from today, and I don't know how I didn't see it before (I've been around a long time) but I wanted to say thank you for putting this out there, and being real, being you. each of us has struggle in our lives and its there for more than just us to overcome, it's there also for us to walk through and help others along the journey if we can. and I think that's important that you are trying to reach others and just say hey I'm here on this journey too. congrats on baby too! you are a wonderful mom, I look to you as the soft kindhearted mom, sweet sensitive and true. a role model, and a peer. than you for being the best you that you can be, it's all we can do. and you're making a difference in my life, and I know in others too. thank you Kayli

Everybody's bodies are beautiful. It doesn't matter if you are big or skinny. After been bullied for over 6 years for my weight and going to therapy and being depressed. I decided to start loving my self and being my self. Now im happy and live my life how want to live it.

I have never struggled with an eating disorder, however I have struggled with addiction, and I think they are more similar than most understand. I used to be that person that thought just eat? They I hear those people say just stop your addiction? So I have a lot of respect for not only your ability to stop, but your choice to share this because people are SO mean and not empathetic so GOOD FOR YOU

Thank you so much for sharing your story. You are so beautiful, I'm currently facing the battle of trying to become healthy. It's only in the past few months I have begun to acknowledge the fact I have an issue and it needs to be addressed. For so long I convinced myself that everyone was lying and I didn't have an issue but I think I do.... You inspire me I want so badly to get better and follow my dreams and return to the job I once loved. I so badly want to get married and start a family and I know I can't do these things until I start to work on getting my mind and body healthy. Thank you so much for being so open I couldn't imagine how hard it must have been to be so open. You are so inspiring and so beautiful. xxxx

Just to tell you HOW STRONG and HOW SWEET you are! Thank you, really.

GOSH Kayli, you are so strong, I'm so touched by your story. I share in that pain as I see so much of myself in what you are saying. With family support I saw myself through it all, everything you are saying is bringing back a flood of memories and emotions.This has literally has brought me to tears. You are so beautiful, and telling us about past struggles makes you as a person seem so much more beautiful, genuine, honest, loving, and stronger for sharing this... I don't think you understand how much of a difference you have made in sharing... You are much stronger then I. Your 3 kids are so lucky to have you as a mother and example. I have been watching your for more than a year... and didn't realize I hadn't subscribed! Love you!

i know this is an old video and you may not see this but I am new to the Shaytards videos and I immediately thought to myself how beautiful you are once i discovered you and who you are! i was very shocked to stumble onto this video and to learn that you went through this. i am so sorry that you had to experience those feelings but i really want you to know how beautiful and kind you are! you have this light about you and it truly does shine on the videos and i hope that you are able to see that in yourself because I see it!!

Thank you so much Kayli ❤️

This story is so similar to anna saccone jolys , you two should do a video together ! That would be so cool 💗

you are such a huge role model for young woman and girls. you are utter perfection!

Kayli there's hope in everyone I'm glad that you're so open about this and touching hearts ❤️❤️❤️ God can help you through it

I went through bulimia for about 2 years in high school, my wake up call came when my mum had my try on my bridesmaid dress for her wedding (which had fit me a few months earlier) and it was HUGE. She told me I had to get through this otherwise she would call off her wedding until I was better. My recovery was gradual but I did it. The struggle is ongoing and I find myself feeling sick after meals and I find it tough to diet and exercise and not be obsessive about it. I'm 24 now and I know I will probably struggle for a lot longer with this illness, it never goes away. To any young girls out there who are struggling, please find the courage to tell someone, a friend, an adult, a teacher. It is the first step toward a normal life. You are really strong for making this video Kayli!

Kayli you're so strong, I look up to you. You're truly amazing💜 I struggle with my body everyday and it sucks. 😪

I only just realised you had a channel (after watching Casey's family vlog) had no idea you went through this, you are a very inspiring person and thank you for sharing xx

Hi Kayli, I don't know if you'll ever read this, but thank you for being so brave to share this with us on KZfaq. I wonder how you're doing now with all this. I haven't had an eating disorder but I definitely relate to having issues with my size and my weight. When I was in school, I was the bullied kid. I remember one day, a bunch of the girls who never spoke to me, said how skinny I was and how great that was that I would never have had to diet. I ate plenty, I just put on the weight late, at 17ish it caught up with me. I think that really stuck with me, even though it shouldn't have, and I felt like skinniness was the one thing I had. As I got older and I struggled to be skinny, I felt like I'd lost the one good thing I had. I'm tall and I used to be tall and skinny, for a short while. Now, I can't not be curvy. I try to feel ok about it but it feels like curves look good on other women but not on me. I think the only reason I don't have an eating disorder and haven't gone as far as you did is because I have reminded myself often "What does it matter", compared to bigger more important things. I know that maybe wouldn't work for everyone but it is what has helped me to take my mind off worrying about my weight. At work, a lot of women talk for a long, long time about calorie counting, they're obsessed, and honestly it's boring! I don't want to be that person who only talks about weight loss and calories. So I try to remind myself that even if I am curvier than I'd like, it doesn't matter, I should still laugh and have fun and not worry about it too much, my body clearly likes having a little bit of fat on it :). I really hope you're doing better now Kayli and have maybe even got past this, best wishes 💗 Amy

Kayli you are one of the most perfect youtubers out there and i'm not just saying that you don't ever need to feel this way bc you have a husband and children and family and viewers that love you you are so inspiring for me to watch and i don't ever want you to change ♡

I came across this video just last night and I had to watch it, thanks so much for sharing your story I can relate to the way you were feeling at the time, I too had an eating disorder when I was younger, not many people know, sometimes it's still something I struggle with. Not going to go into much more detail.

I cried, you are so brave and so strong and you being you is the best thing you can do. We are all here for you and I had no clue you went through this terrible experience. But I am so happy you got out of it!!! Your beautiful and don't let anyone tell you different, your smile makes the world shine, so keep on smiling pretty girl because god wants you here got a reason and Your beautiful. This gave me chills, I love you, stay strong. Xoxo:')

I also feel like I gain a lot of weight and my friends are skinny and have beautiful bodies, and I never get the chance to exercise. I am only ten and I almost weigh 100 pounds thank you for all support I think people like to lose weight, but they're ignoring the fact that everyone has the perfect body, even if it's different than others and to keep looking up. Love you!

Kayli, I know I'm young but my parents always tell me that I speak so well meaning I use good words and good language. You are so beautiful and I know everyone on here is just saying "why would she do this she is the most beautiful woman ever." Yes I think that too about you but I do understand that it was an addiction. You are so sweet and so beautiful. I'm so glad that you're getting better and yes there is hope for a normal life! You are so amazing I love you stay strong!

Your are such a inspiration for me. I have eating disorder and been struggling for 3 years. I am having a counsellor and it's hard when your parent don't believe me and don't like to ask for help. I've had really rough time. I self harmed and purge so many times. I have over come the self harming but now again I purge. I have tried to go to a eating disorder specialist. I went for the first session and I didn't go again. So I got a way by missing meal while I was at school I lied so many times. I told my parent I wonted to get well. So my parents supported me and the only thing I'm letting me help me is my school counsellor and my parent didn't know and still don't now I see her still. I got pulled since I was year 7 and it stopped last year what was year 11. I am year 12 know and right now I'm struggling with reading and writing. I bio eve I'm dyslexia but my parent don't believe me. My parent don't understand me so that's why I have an eating disorder.

I just remembered on the moms view you mentioned an eating disorder, so I knew I had to look it up. I just got diagnosed with anorexia this past year even though i've been struggling with it for a couple years. I always think that if I just push away my thoughts that I am healed or that how can I be a child of God and have an eating disorder-its either one or the other. And it honestly just sucks how much an eating disorder can manipulate your thoughts. I havent told many people yet, only a couple of closed friends know and my therapists. I havent even told my parents yet.

I started to cry when u started to cry please don't cry!!! I will support u all the way!!!

Kayli I have the same issue and I'm eleven I know its hard we still have hope for a good life so don't be ashamed xxx let Jesus be happy for you x

I watched this series before, but a couple weeks ago I got called fat and ugly so I started watching the series again to see if it can help me a little bit. I really haven't eaten much since that day so I hope this helps when I watch these.

Wipe those tears from your eyes.Your an angle.

Kayli you are amazing. I have a 11 year old has a eating disorder she passed away a few days ago.

Omg Kayli I love you and appreciate you SO much. I didn't even know about this series until now and I have been watching you for a while, and I always have thought how beautiful, skinny, and perfect you were! Even while pregnant I thought how beautiful you are and I hope I can look like that when I am pregnant! I cried the whole time. Love you

Thank you so much for this. You are an incredible soul.

heykayli wipe those tears you are who you are and no one can change that I am really sorry you are going through this you are really beautiful you have your kid there for you and see will be more then happy to help you get though this and a wonderful husband I love watching your videos and I will always love them

Bless you & your strength!!!

You are so beautiful, i'm jealous at your kids that they have such an awesome mom

your precious honey, and beautiful, Bless you sweetheart

You are so strong!

in the first 55 seconds it made me cry.

Kayli you are a very strong young young woman. I'm sorry what happened to you put in glad you are still a live because you and casey's make a perfect couple and perfect 👌 family. 👌👌👌👌👌👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👌👌👌👌👌👌👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

I want to give you a hug right now

I tried to stop eating for a few days a while ago. A few days ago I was thinking about doing it again. *Note I'm 12* I hate my body and weight gain runs in my family. I don't know what to do. I also puke a lot because of anxiety. I just don't know what to do. My mom wanted to get me a therapist to talk about my feelings. Is that a thing I should tell him/her? Please help.

Kayli your such a beautiful girl and you are brave and hope that you had a good trip

so sad and upsetting I can't imagine that type of pain but know that there are people that give a shit about all of you

i so sorry :(

Your different in a good way my mommy is just you ok she is still doing great 😃

Your beautiful in every way

Your so beautiful and I have the Opposite problem I have trouble gaining wait i dont like my body cause I feel like I look gross an my bones stick out but I eat an im trying to eat more then I normally do but I still cant gain wait or I gain a pound an then lose it and some people say im not gross but I think what made me feel that way is when we looked at my moms wedding picks an she pointed out my bones an said I looked gross I never told her but that effected me a lot :-( so my problem is kind of the opposite I feel like im not normal because im so skinny but I love you and love watching you even though my problems opposite its kind of smilary in a way an you have helped me alittle bit thank you kaylia for saying your story you are beautiful an brailee is so lucky both your kids are lucky to have you as a mom love you kaylia

IM CRYING SO BAD😒

your beautiful kayli.

Oh kayl I who cares about what those mean people say if they don't accept you you are beautiful and pretty after all the niceness you have been to your kids God loves you all I care about is how nice you are who cares about your look I love you be happy 💄👠👗👛✉️📩📨🇺🇸🎀🎁💖💗💕💞💓❤️💙💚💛💜🍎🍊🍙🍞🍞🍝🍢🍢🍢🍢🍣🍎🍉🍉🍍🍈🍈🍠🌽🍋🍑🍖👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨😇😊😀😄😃

I was watching your latest video about your pregnancy update, catching up because I haven't visited your channel lately, when this video came up in the recommended videos. I clicked on it because as someone who is "recovered" from bulimia, I really appreciate hearing someone else's story to know that I truly am not alone.. But a few minutes in, I was in tears. I relate to your story so drastically and it hit me like a freight train. I was five years recovered until I had a bad slip up this year, but I'm giving it my all to get back on track. Thank you so much for sharing your story, Kayli.

I just finished watching Portia Rossi DeGeneres talking about her struggles with her eating disorder. It was so informative and enlightening. Then listening to you saying the same things was brave and so helpful for you and for so many others going through the same thing. It reminds us to not look at the outside because you and Portia are both beautiful and perfect in that regard but we don't see the broken, hurting person inside. Thank you for sharing. 💗💕

Why are you so beautiful?💕

Kayli you are beautiful

I was so anorexic in high school. And you're all right, it doesn't go away, and it's a daily struggle. It's something I've only recently opened up about, even though it's been going on my whole life. I too have gotten better, but have a ways to go yet in having a healthy relationship with food and with myself. I'm thankful for people like you, Kayli. Thanks for inviting me on this journey.

Hi Kayli, I just wanted to tell you how much strength you are giving me as I am struggling with my eating disorder. I watch your videos everyday and I hope one day I can be as strong and happy you are. Thank you for everything

I've commented many times before on kayli's eating disorder videos, but I love watching these tbh.. I feel like it brings me closer to her in a way. she is such a beautiful mother to her three beautiful kids. and a beautiful person inside and out.. I love her and the whole butler family... she's doing so many things right... love you Kayli!!💙

this really touched me! i can relate to this on so many levels. thank you for making this video! you have no idea how many people you have helped by being so honest about this horrible disease.

I've struggled with depression, anxiety, low self esteem, self hate/harm and forms of body dismorphia ever since I was 15. Now 19, I'm medicated. I've opened up to my family and my fantastic boyfriend of almost two years. I feel my family still doesn't understand. They still react in anger during my relapses. It's been so hard and I feel as if I've gotten better, but from what I see I do to myself I know I'm not. Every day is nearly impossible for me to get through. Thank you so much, Kayli, for staring your story. You are so strong! I'm just waiting for my something or someone to motivate me to help and accept myself.

Thank you for sharing your story Kayli. I'm 30 now and I did struggle with this issue when younger. It's a tough battle because you're battling against yourself. But you now have kiddies to look after and be a good role model for, you have a husband who loves you for you. Stay strong and keep inspiring!

This video sent chills up my spine... so similar to my story and struggle, but my parents didn't know for 5 years, until I told a psychologist and worked up the courage to tell my parents. I didn't lose much weight (in fact, my weight yo-yo'ed) and was VERY good at hiding it- it was like a game. I haven't purged in 2 years, which is a huge accomplishment that I treasure every day. Thank you for sharing your story!

watched this for the second time and my eyes welled up again within the first 20 seconds! i don't think you realise just how much of an amazingly helpful resource this is to people who suffer from eating disorder, whether they are under the addiction or for their friends and family. it's such a difficult and frustrating issue because there is no cure or quick fix to make it all better. it sticks. it's so so hard to get your head round. these videos lift some of the burden. thank you :)

Thank you so much Kayli! You have made me more aware and educated about matters like these. You are such a beautiful inspiration to a lot of people, myself included and I thank you for that. I thank you for your advice: to be the best me that I can be and to just love myself. This is something I will carry with me. I will pray for you during your journey and wish you and your family good health! Thanks for the love!

I'm 17 and have suffered from bulimia since I was 12. I know how you feel and seeing how you are now, gives me motivation to get help and fix myself, I love you and thank you for this video.

You are giving people hope!!! I applaud you sweet lady for what you are doing and for sharing your own struggles . It's not easy having an eating disorder, I too have one. I'm 57 and still struggle daily with self image stuff. I love that you're speeking out and I will follow your jouney. Thank You 💕

It kills me , for everyone who has a struggle no one has a perfect life and thank you so much Kayli, you inspire me so much, I struggle and wish I was like any other people, I have really bad skin and it's so bad , I know I have to accept myself. I love you so much, you mean so much !!!! You are so blessed !!!

I am 11 years old I don't like my body people make front of me but I put them to the back of my head and I got on, you are such a inspiration to me and I look up to you, you are beautiful in every way there is. I love you kali 😘❤️

I bawled my eyes out while watching this....you're SO incredible! Ive been struggling with anorexia and bulimia for nearly a year and i feel like nobody understands. I feel so hopeless, but because of u, i have faith. Thank you so much

i love you kayli! loving the entire butler family!

I can't believe I have just seen this video. THANK YOU Kayli for posting this. I have struggled with bulimia and mental health issues since I was 10/11. Only recently started to overcome it after having my daughter. You have given me hope that I can keep going with my progress.

Kayli, you're the most beautiful person in my eyes(: thank you for sharing your story. It takes so much courage to talk about this. You've really changed my life. Thank you

Keep it up Kayli! God bless you. You are going to do it!! And all of those struggling, it will be over! Stay strong and love yourself the way you are. (As you look out to be like another person... Someone else is looking out to be like you... So just be YOURSELF!!!!

Kayli, you have know idea how this video made me feel. I have been stuggling with self image issues for the past six years, and to know that someone as beautiful and wonderful as you has felt the same way make me feel better. Not because I would wish these feelings on anyone, but because I feel like I am truly no alone in this. I have been working at getting better but you make me want to get past this even more. You inspire me.

Kaliy you are such an amazing mom and you inspire them so much and you put your journey out for the world to see it. I know it has been hard you be dealing with this. Stay strong.

This video has me in tears. Like bawling like a little baby. I can relate so much.

Kayli, you're amazing & I adore you. All of those after school special type videos that are supposed to show kids how wrong bulimia & other things are only made me think "that's how to do it" as well. I struggled w/bulimia for years & it's still a struggle to not do it. You're right - it's a high, an addiction. With all of the crazy things going on in my life - the abuse, the chaos - what I ate & how I purged it was the one thing I could control. Thank you for making this video.

These videos really hit home for me; not as someone who has an eating disorder, but the person I love with all my heart has one, and she's now in recovery, but she's in the very early stages and it's so hard, but these videos really open my eyes to what she may be going through...I can't thank you enough for posting these videos Kayli, You're a beautiful person.

This video is the turning point for me. I could never imagine one of the Butler women dealing with something like this. You guys are my role models. I've been dealing with anorexia and anorexia athletic for two years and counting. I don't know how to explain it, I'm just not happy with who I am. But how will I ever be if let that voice continue to degrade me? I now know that the voices can't control me, you don't have to be skinny to be beautiful. I honestly do it all on my own. No one knows that I do this. And now they'll never have to know. It all starts by ditching the workout tonight. Thank you so much Kayli! You're the reason I've decided to heal.

It is so hard to see how emotional and hard this is for Kayli. She is so strong, and seeing her and hearing how much this affects her makes me want to cry too :(

Kayli, you are a beautiful person. Don't worry about what people think or what anybody else looks like. What matters is that you like you for you...I love you Kayli, and you have a wonderful life and a good heart. ❤

I'm so proud of you for doing these videos and I haven't gone through an eating disorder but I have really struggled with my body image and I know that God has made me how I am and my body is his temple and it has been a long hard journey. You are such a beautiful strong woman and you are beautiful!!

my goodness, kayli. you have me tearing up over here. i feel your pain so much and i too am currently struggling with accepting myself. i never had an eating disorder, but i'm struggling with the fact that i feel worthless. it's gotten to a point where i hate looking at myself in front of the mirror. and the worst thing of all is i feel forced or obligated to keep this to myself cause i always feel like noone could possibly understand how i feel ... :'(. the feeling has gotten worse and idk what to do...

Kayli, this is only the 2nd video of yours that I've seen, I'm a Shaytards follower, and it's been a month since you've posted this, but you're my new favorite. I've had body issues my entire life, and am just now learning to process through everything (27 years later), and it's such a relief to know that we're not alone. To REALLY know. Thank you so much for baring your heart to us, and I can't wait to see where this journey takes us. You are loved!!!

your beautiful dont cry be your self dont let any tell you your to old so on you are my favorite from all the video vlog. and you make me feel more happy and so grateful your like the medicine to make people feel unsad

I just stumbled across this video while on a makeup/hair tutorial marathon. I've had an eating disorder for three years, and have been "in recovery" for about 6 months. It was really nice to hear your story, and be reminded of why I need to push through the struggles. Thank you for sharing!

Bless you Kayli! Ive struggled with bulimia for 3 years now (since sophomore year of high school) I'm 18 now. My family and friends didn't know about my eating disorder until after 2 years of this disease. Thank you so much for sharing!! I'm willing to go on this journey with you:)

I felt the same way, but never went on a full eating disorder. I do still have body image issues, bit you need to let go and just be free. Body weight is such a minor part of life, happiness is accepting who you are.

Today was another milestone in my recovery- I performed for the first time on stage with a guitar and won first place in the competition! A year ago, 25 pounds thinner and absolutely ISOLATED AND MISERABLE with my confidence rock bottom, I never would have imagined this yet here I am- it's thanks to loving and beautiful people like you, Kayli, dotted all around the world that encourage victims of ANY traumas or disorders to move on.

People think lowly of people that have eating disorders, call them superficial, but they have no idea what it is like. I still live with the daily reminders, like my acid reflux. I have to constantly watch what I eat. I just love that your whole family, shaytards included, is so open and ready to help anyone! I love you guys so much!

I think it's awesome that you have the guts to share your struggles with body image. I know a lot of women feel bad about their body image, thanks to the media shoving what is "sexy" down our throats since we were kids, so we're brainwashed that way. Thank you for speaking about this matter that touches so many of our lives. Keep talking about these issues, because the more you expose the darkness to the light the more freedom we get!

You're such an inspiration. I've been struggling from anorexia for 6 years now. It's a daily battle and a struggle every single day. I can relate to everything in your video. It's good to know you're not alone. Thank you for sharing your story

My heart is breaking, and it goes out to you Kali. I'm crying right now, you're so beautiful, and that's one of the things I want to do to encourage young women to know they are beautiful no matter what. Keep this going. ♡♡♡

I have a past in disordered eating and this video really touched me. I hope it will be helpful to those out there who are struggling. Thanks for being strong enough to share.