HELLO : D

HELLO

Hihi

HELLO :D ALSO DW ABOUT IT WE’LL BE HERE

HELLO HOPE YOURE OKAY NOW NO WORRIES

Same. Only thing you sometimes hear me saying is that I sadly have never had a girlfriend. Cause ya know. Kinda hope it will not happen again since I've basically found my soulmate

same, im also a bi girl dating a guy and i would never say this- my boyfriend is bi and trans though so i very much feel as if im in a queer relationship and haven't internalized that biphobia which is good

Exactly. I'm also bi and I'm pretty sure that if I ever end up w someone, it's bec I like them. Why would they even date the guy if they'll treat them like shit.

Also misandri to like... If you dontvlike men, first check yourself, second, dont date them?

i need to work on that.... advice?

fact

Your pfp is cool

@@middlemarch5507 hes a man whether u like it or not

Yeah, because trans people are perfect angels who can do no wrong. Okay dumdum. 😒 I wonder how you react to trans people who call out this pronoun/neopronoun BS.

this used to be true, but now it’s not even about wanting to be treated fairly. people are picking and choosing pronouns and fake genders like pins and accessories-and that’s literally the opposite of what we’ve worked so hard to get to. to get to a point where we are taken seriously and people realize we’re just regular human beings who were born with a brain that didn’t match our bodies. but now that it’s “cool” to be trans, and everything can be a gender (because cats totally are a gender and describe gender) and everything and anything can be a pronoun (ive seen someone seriously use vag/vags/vagself as well as piss/pisses/pissself and shit/shits/shitself). any logical human being can look at that and say that’s not how it works. gender isn’t a cool thing you get to choose, pronouns aren’t a special little pin you wear and switch out when you get bored, gender is an innate sense of self that everyone is born with. people who use neopronouns or xenogenders or don’t have dysphoria…they make people who suffer with discrimination look like a joke. i don’t associate myself with the lgbt community anymore because i lost friends because they started hearing this shit and thinking i was like that too. my family has stopped taking me seriously because they think i’m going to be a cat gender. my fucking girlfriend left me because she didn’t want to be with someone who was like them, even though i’m not. honestly, transphobes have a good reason for hating queer people now, because we really are making our community a delusional fantasy land where you can just be whatever you want and no one can say anything to oppose you.

lolol

no bc i hate when ppl act like the lgbt community is so great the amount of times someones been called transphobic and said "im not transphobic im bi" like girl those two have no corrolation at all... mf never seen blaire white even trans ppl can be transphobic... .

I agree, technically I'm pan & nb, but I've never really felt comfortable with categorising/labelling myself, and don't really care what pronouns people use for me, so I feel like I'm not really welcome in the community a lot of times... I don't put that much importance on my own gender or sexuality, but because of this, people in the community accuse me of faking for attention etc just because I don't feel as strongly about labels/pronouns as they do!

Its not too hard to put a label on sexuality or gender Sexuality: Homosexual, Bisexual, Asexual, Heterosexual, Gender: Male, Female It's that simple

@@grumpiesttitan7930 not really my dude. "Female" and "male" are not genders. They're sexes. And I'm attracted to everyone, not just men and women. Stfu with your transphobia

@@mezziriggs3873 exactly! There's so much more in life than gender and sexuality. I wanna just love who I love and live my life rather than spending sooooo much time figuring out who I like, what my preferences are, etc.

same!!

As an autistic person stick person I did not realize that that was that was a reason and I just got really confused when I realized that people use nouns as pronouns I'm just pronounced So thanks for clarifying

as an autistic neopronoun user, I agree! I don't personally see my gender as male/female/nonbinary so finding neopronouns that I really liked that I feel fit me and the way I view myself was great :]

I definitely feel this as an autistic person. I identify as a trans guy and use he/him (and maybe they/them but idk yet) but I also feel a lot of apathy and disconnect from my gender so I could totally get why neopronouns would feel best to some people. Plus gender can be fun! Sometimes playing with different pronouns/names/gender expressions can be affirming and also can be a little silly and fun. I also feel like people who use neopronouns are often demonized as these hypersensitive "snowflakes" but really everyone I have met who uses neopronouns is very aware of the fact that they can take some adjustment. It's just another way to demonize non-conforming trans people by separating them from the "normal" trans people.

I feel like using neo pronouns would just further alienate people from the rest of society. It inadvertently creates an additional language barrier between a neo pronoun user (wether autistic or not) and a non neo pronoun user. This would simply lead people further away from the ones that use those pronouns. And in the case of autistic people, who already have issues with socializing and communication, this creates a further divide or sense of otherness.

Yeah exactly!

is your pfp D'Angelo Wallace

Well, it does affect me if I have to use it to refer to people. Maybe it's easier for you because English is a very forgiving language when it comes to that, but using neo pronouns, or even just gender neutral pronouns in other languages just doesn't work.

@@__Oku__ which languages you either copy pasted this from google translate or you speak english which means your wrong and what someone identifies as has absolutely NO affect on you your well being or anything if you don’t like their pronouns then don’t fuck with them simple as that

@@levi5862 hell yeaaaaa

I feel like way more straight guys would "sound gay" if not for society-wide homophobia leading them to be terrified of being perceived that way and training themselves to talk differently

@@Diamondelight92 !!!

They won’t though. A lot of people are fine with trans people who want to just live their lives, but are not okay with froggender he/they/it/goth/bunself people

@@apollo6326 But don't people who go by labels and pronouns like that just want to live their lives as well? I mean, they're not hurting anyone by doing so, so I see no reason not to accept it. Plus, the typical cis transphobe doesn't even know about labels and pronouns like that. I think most of the people who don't accept those types of labels/pronouns are other trans/genderqueer people. While I don't go by those types of labels/pronouns, I really don't see any reason not to just let people do what they want as long as they're not hurting anyone.

@@apollo6326 if their support is conditional, they are transphobic pos

@@KittyCat-we8xi My problem with xeno/neogenders is that they're contorting the classification of gender to a degree that it's meaningless. Xenogenders especially, as they are specifically not a part of the gender spectrum, which in everyday life and even in intersectional feminist circles is the norm definition of "gender" in my experience, if xeno-genders are a form of identity, it shouldn't be gender. For neo-genders it's more just the idea that it's making the classification of gender so inherently individualistic that the category of "gender" is essentially meaningless to anyone outside of the individual. I understand that everyone's interpretation of their gender identity is individualistic and unique, but with the 3 categories, M, F and NB, we can at least break that down into something that we can use for utility, if everyone has their own gender, and that gender isn't even tied to the most understood definition of gender(which is my opinion), then gender can't really be used as a classification system or category, which means it's pretty much useless to society. I will always just refer to xeno/neo pronouned people by their name or as them/they as I would just classify their gender as NB. In terms of someone having their own individual word for their gender/ gender identity, I don't really care, it's when we start trying to change the definition of gender to the point where it becomes meaningless that I disagree with it.

@@suckmyduck7029 The thing is, gender being classified as M, F, NB is completely meaningless to us autistic people who identify with xeno/neo genders. Those classifications mean absolutely nothing to us and we just do not fit into any of those boxes. So where those have utility to you, they have none to us, and using xenogenders to express ourselves to other autistic folk and other people is much much more useful to us in terms off describing ourselves and our genders.

A life is supposed to grow, change...evolve..that's our only goal...is to become.

YES!! (i just wrote a similar comment before i read yours lol)

Omg same

Yeah he became stupid :(

@@grumpiesttitan7930 why do u think that way?

@@kairat8365 aren't xenopronouns just pronouns that "can't be expressed through human language"?

@@kairat8365 i think that's just xenogender, labels are confusing

Yeah which is kinda odd because xenopronouns fall under the neopronoun spectrum. (People will say they support neos but then say they don't support xenopronouns).

i dont understand the pokepronouns tbh.

In my online interactions it seems to be mainly people with autism who use object/ animal pronouns. IMO, I can understand why neurodiverse individuals use these legitimately, but can’t really understand how a neurotypical person could.

wait wow that is actually a good way to sum it up

Wait I like that a lot better cause it's quicker

wait i love that

How widespread is that acronym?

Yes yes yes

Theres also the people who say the A stands for ally which is worse

I totally agree. as an asexual demiboy I usually say lgbtq+ because that's what I've heard when I first learned about it and what just feels natural to me if that makes sense. i don't rly care about what other people call it tho as long as they don't purposely exclude someone and keep the plus

as a fellow A, I use lgbtq+ and feel so so so excluded when people only use lgbt. i hope we normalize the usage of lgbtq+

Agreed. I prefer using the longer LGBTQIA+ acronym because it feels more inclusive, but use LGBTQ+ when I don't have enough characters to type it out, or if it takes too long. As long as the Q+ is included, I'm okay.

The As in the community I know (let me know if I forgot any) are Asexual Aromantic Agender Abrosexual. I don't get why the community doesn't always want Asexual and Aromantic in the community so what if they are heterosexual or heteoromantic as well as asexual or aromantic it's part of the community too and it matters

Yesssss

yess this!! because I'm not always comfy sharing my pronouns around certain people, and if you just share yours I know you will be more likely to accept mine

^^^This. I was once closeted in a situation where pronouns were mandatory, and so it was like "well do I out myself to literally everyone, or consciously misgender myself while simultaneously telling everybody else to misgender me?" Ultimately I came out before I was ready in order to explain why it was a problem, and how they should be optional. To further prove your point, somebody near me said his pronouns on the first day of class in school, and that gave me the courage to say my own (before I realized that I passed and was full stealth after just three months on T). I didn't feel forced. I didn't even think about it, but if he hadn't said his pronouns then I might have had a very different semester.

thanks so much for the idea i’ll definitely use that in the future

As a trans woman and a teacher, this is really important. So many teachers ask their class for everyone's pronouns in an attempt to be inclusive, but an authority figure demanding that you either out yourself or misgender yourself/lie to them can be terrifying. So I just introduce myself with name and pronouns and then a lot of students feel comfortable responding by introducing themselves with their names and pronouns, but if they don't, it's not conspicuous.

Okay (I disagree but your opinion is still valid.)

@@october3706 Bruh no it isn't, it's obviously a joke and the opinion is supposed to be dumb

@@suckmyduck7029 how clueless do you think I am? Lmao I know it's a joke chill

"I believe in equality, i dont want more rights than other peo-" "okay then, go to work, pay rent, do your taxes" "uuuuhhhnnn but im so pretty and so weird im like a two headed baby cow i wasnt meant to live in a post industrial society i was meant to frolic around a garden and paint and have a sexy rich man paint me, I should be naked making flower crowns for two other girls with long flowing hair - i am not a normal person im a muse, a god, a servant, get away from me"

@@sanriodeppressionthermos8602 What

The thing is, neo/xeno-pronoun users know that their pronouns can be clunky, so they typically use multiple sets. I know a lot of neopronoun users but not a single one of them exclusively goes by xyz-self, they almost always also go by a more standard pronoun as well like he/she/they or it. On top of this there are several websites that help people learn how to conjugate custom neoprouns. Your argument(?) is honestly a non-issue

@@nyxie664 ok good to know :D sometimes I get worried haha

@@justwhy9427 I didn’t know there were websites! I check them out

Rvrcxe pronouny is prob the most popular

@@justwhy9427 ok thanks!

This is so interesting. There isn't even a plural they? How do you refer to a group of multiple people that you're not part of?

Just asking, even "Es" isn't used as a non-binary pronoun? I'm currently learning German at school and they say to us that "Es" is a "Neutral" pronoun. I always think about that but I never really discovered the answer :/

Now that you said it, I never thought about how other languages like German dealt with they/their pronouns. So in that regard many nonbinary people speaking those languages would have to use neo pronouns. So saying that neo pronouns are extra or invalid is very ignorant.

@@caju8557 Not a native speaker, but when I took German I brought this up to my professor and she explained that "es" is generally used for things with low/no autonomy like very small children, animals, and inanimate objects, not the kind of thing you'd want to use for an adult human (unless they asked you to like with "it" in English)

@@jasperchappel9379 Plural pronouns are the same pronouns as she/her, annoyingly enough. The grammatical difference comes from the suffixes in the associated verbs. And even the more neutral "es" (it) takes the masculine form when possessive or when in the dative case. The German language is exhaustingly gendered, it drives me up the wall.

love this take

@zyumi del rey .｡*♡ yeah I am genderfluid but still can’t talk for every genderfluid person but in my case I just use all pronouns others use just one set of pronouns and other yeah change their pronouns regularly

@@vsconcllos i speak spanish too and i have heard people using the neutral neopronoun elle which i know probably wasn't your main point but i do think it's worth mentioning

@@vsconcllos i speak spanish too and you can definitely use neo pronouns just the same as you can use them in English and ive seen a lot of hispanic nb people use them. Its not so hard.

Clearly, you don't understand how language works. The "issue" with neopronouns is so first world problem. And it could never work with other languages

Im sorry but can you explain neopronouns? Is it just people making up letters or does it mean something? (Not trying to be rude)

@@gsse6629 well from my quick google search, neopronouns are used so that people dont mix up the plural they and singular they, and more importantly some nonbinary people prefer to use these since they feel like the conventional ones dont reflect themselves

@@eee1001 okay thanks

@@gsse6629 It's pretty much making up some new pronouns when already existing ones don't feel right. They can be harder to use and remember to the average person, but they should still be respected. Hope this helped ❤

@@charlieandhisantics9954real

I agree with this!

Except they’re not nicknames, so you’re proposal doesn’t make sense

@@bubbleswashere. i mean theyre used instead of a person's name (as one would use pronouns) execpt "star" and "moon" are nouns, not pronouns, so they'd technically be nicknames, bc u use them in the place youd use the persons name

@@inkmuste No, they’re in place of “regular” pronouns. For instance, “Sammy wants popsicles because he is hot” would be “Sammy wants popsicles because star is hot” with use of star pronouns

@@inkmuste the difference is you’d still use their name, with nicknames you’d use it instead of the name almost entirely

I mean if they ask they might just be asking to make sure.. because like lets say if someone went by they/them using he/him wouldnt be right.. not all nb people look androgynous and not everyone who does is nb.. I wouldnt say your wrong because thats how you feel about it but thats my reasoning/thinking Plus tbh i think including your pronouns when introducing yourself (even if youre cis) should be more normalised.. not to weed out the trans people but so it yknow.. becomes something more normal

Well, they are trying not to misgender you! It's an effort to be kind to you. If you were nonbinary, wouldn't you prefer someone ask rather than assume your pronouns?

@@SpecialInterestShow hey there, I guess it's just a part of my stupid dysphoria where sometimes if people don't assume I'm male right away just makes me feel kind of bad about myself silly I know

@@yakuzaman5074 I understand. I suppose that's something for you to work on. It you have a therapist perhaps that'd be a nice thing to bring up! /gen

What was their opinion on it

yeah I’m asexual, I usually just say lgbtq because lgbtqia+ is very difficult to say and can make things a bit clunky

@@bigmanrui3503 i'm asexual and use lgbtq too!

Yeah as a pansexual, I'm ok being in the plus lol

Yeah I agree -aroace person

A lot of times I just say queer community

You *still* put people on the spot when they also have to introduce themselves with pronouns. That's literally forcing someone to misgender themselves or come out dude

@@puta8002 I mean the idea is that if people are comfortable introducing themselves with their pronouns they do so, which means that if other people want to do the same they don’t have to be the only one doing it. If someone just responds with “ok, I’m ___” then you just move on, nbd. Trust me there has been no shortage of people who don’t say their pronouns even if you do. But it opens the gate for people to share theirs if they want to :)

@@elliotjames3895 hope so but people kind of pick up if only one person doesn't introduce themselves the way others do. Like that doesn't go unnoticed and that's how i got outed at work

@@puta8002 it really sucks that you had to go through that and I’m sorry. I just think it’s the most neutral way, as a trans person who has dealt with the uncomfortable “out myself or be misgendered” when asked about my pronouns before. Obviously there is no perfect method, but that is what has worked best for me

@@elliotjames3895 best is to just refer to everyone as "fucker" 💀 that's the only pronoun we'll ever need

YEAHHHH I LOVE HIS SWEATER

@zyumi del rey .｡*♡ ooh, what is that? I’d love to hear your thoughts

i have an ace attorney hyperfixation rn and currently its focused very strongly on Godot so i made a lotta hcs for him this will contain spoilers for ace attorney trials and tribulations btw and i haven't finished the game so if any stuff is inaccurate then im sorry (a lot of these are mia x godot) mia always used to make him hot chocolate in the winter which he hates but he pretended to like cause she always looked so happy giving him it he has a problem looking in mirrors because every time he thinks theres a stranger there because he still doesn't see himself as himself after he was poisoned he is always paranoid of any food or drink he's given and only takes stuff from trusted people he drinks scalding hot coffee because of nerve damage and the burning is the only sensation he feels much of anymore he pretends he likes really hardcore metal songs but loves soft romance songs he has an engagement ring he was going to give mia still in his drawer and he sometimes wears it to feel better him and mia both got their ears pierced together on their second date godot doesn't fear death, because if it happens he knows he'll be together with his love soon he has punched multiple people for making fun of mia before but has never punched someone for making fun kf him directly no matter how long passes, godot always wakes up and goes to cuddle mia but is always extremely sad theres just air hes never worked up the courage to ask a spirit medium to contact mia because hes ashamed of how he is now

@@silvershadow1271 that’s so cool! I love your head cannons!!! I’ve never played that game before, but your head cannons for them are so interesting! Sounds so fun :)

@zyumi del rey .｡*♡ somehow same…🙃

never heard somebody say that but YES

in the small group of people i know i've just asked their pronouns straight up when meeting them the first time..my intentions weren't to judge their presentations (i use she/they pronouns). I don't want people to feel subconsciously like i'm judging them...is there anything else i can do to make them feel like their not judged?

Actually all of the cases I encountered were just people like Nia Sanjeev that just ask everybody it and are very non judgemental and open about it and often don't use the "normal" pronounse that one would assume :o So I always feel very warm and included when someone asks my pronouns, but it also never happened in a way that you guys describe it (or I ddint notice) so yeah

That's exactly how it feels I've never had someone put words to it before!

At the same time, there also are people who just make it a basic introduction thing. Though personally I lean into "This is my name, these are my pronouns" so that people who wanna clarify can whereas people want assumption also get that.

I as an ace really like to see the whole thing used as ace / aro people have a visibility problem in general in my opinion. I had to get over 30 to even realize ace exists and I am not just a weirdo. So I always use the full acronym because it may open an opportunity to explain what the meaning of A is. :)

Don't respect them

@@grumpiesttitan7930 nah ima respect neopronouns (not the offensive ones tho)

@@beefjerkeywizard all are offensive

there needs to be more people with this mindset thank you :)

@@grumpiesttitan7930 nuh uh

You mean you're cis

Me too!

AWWWWW YOUR PFP

Yeah he disappointed us, how can someone be r*tarded enough to use Xenogenders or Neopronouns?

@@grumpiesttitan7930 I can't believe I'm seeing you in another comment answering in a more aggressive manner. I hope you understand that not every 'real' autistic person is like you, yes we understand gender but some of us don't relate to them and it's simple like that! Makes you comfortable to identify as such so why go out of your way to fit into something that will never accomodate you truly? The r word is a slur and I'm glad if it hasn't been used towards you, because it definitely has been used lots towards me and most of the ND community and it is quite insulting to call people by it, so I understand you're trying to be cool for your peers or maybe just to make yourself feel better, but truth be told, trying to hurt random people online isn't gonna make anything better in any way. Be true to who you are and live your life, you will always find like minded people and there's no need to call people names for not agreeing with you. The world is an awesome place with a lot of diversity, we shouldn't expect everyone to fit in a box?

@@grumpiesttitan7930 Come back when you’re educated

@zyumi♡ Most the xenos claim to be trans. And retard is almost always used to call someone stupid. If retard is a slur so is stupid. And by actual I mean people who don't self diagnose.

I hope that the misgendering stops my friend 🙏 it's not ok if its intentional but its ok if they do it accidentally and correct themselves afterwards.

I’ve seen stuff like kitten/kittenself been used a lot in the furry community so it might be a prevalent thing there that people are associating with trans people because y’know “pronouns”

I find it to be problematic only when these people are saying “cat is my gender” or “deer is my gender”; I just think we should keep the otherkin and the trans community separate because they aren’t the same thing

I mean... At that point, for me at least, it would be about who is more uncomfortable. Because like... These people use different pronouns because other ones make them uncomfortable, right? But when someone comes at me with pronouns such as those with animals or objects or whatever... Well I'm sorry, but using those would make ME very uncomfortable. So then it's just turning into a fight of "who is more uncomfortable?" or is that not the right way to think about it? Because I don't really disrespect people without any reason, but like... I would feel very weird and uncomfortable using those kinds of pronouns. Maybe I'll change my mind, but this is currently my opinion

same thoughts , the n.b. flag is probably one of my favorite flags

Same. It’s one of my favourite flags

I'm not nb and I like the flag

@@starwarswizard5841 same

The Wario flag is one of my fav flags and I’m not even enby

True!

I’ve had straight friends (and family) talk more about queer people than me, and I am queer people

cishet people have been making their sexuality their whole personality for centuries of western culture (mother/father) so now it's normalized as (gendered) personality traits rather than externally reproduced social positions

@Ivy thank you

For me coming out didn't really make a difference in my behavior. Idk why. It just didn't change anything at all.

Rare breed

@@runt7930 I-

0.001% chance

@@horseoperamarker 💀

Same

What are the neo pronouns you like?

Yoooo what are they? I recently found cryp/crypt/crypts/crypts/crypself and they're super comfy :D I'd love to see yours :))

@@alixgrimshaw2420 Cryptid yesss neo pronouns just keep getting better

@@nicothenecromancer im currently making a Google doc of all of my neos and xenos!! :D

@@alixgrimshaw2420 oh my gosh let me know when you're done that sounds amazing!

why should he say anything that would his audience make upset when he wants people to spend money on his stuff?

@@bsrfuchs55 uh

@@bsrfuchs55 he’s rly cool and he doesn’t hurt anyone on purpose-

Yeah, this is one of the places where I have seen growth in Noah and it makes me so happy to see. He has grown up so much and it's really cool to have been able to watch it unfold on KZfaq. I'm old enough to be his grandparent, and I'm trans. And it is so cool to see young afab trans people who grow up into such great adults.

@@pjaypender1009 Bro, this is a really cool thing to read, really

Was is this flag on the left

@@user-mh5ue2oz5i genderfaun!

@@meow_c0s whats that?

@@user-mh5ue2oz5i Someone who is genderfluid who fluctuates between non-binary, agender, and male. I identify as this too :')

@@user-mh5ue2oz5i under the genderfluid umbrella. Shifts between male and genderless genders but no feminine genders

Agree

I understand your point but maybe it would make more sense if you ended with "ah, they are two men who happen to be in a relationship, so by definition they are a homosexual couple"

I agree, but if the couple has a preference not to say their relationship is straight then obviously, people should listen to that

the sun and moon still exist when we can’t see them. just because it’s not visible to someone doesn’t make it any less valid

It's definitely up to each individual couple how they understand their relationship, but I think what the original opinion was trying to get at is that a relationship can be heterosexual AND have queer people in it. So a relationship that appears cishet can be a queer relationship if the queer people in it feel more comfortable saying that and shouldn't be excluded on the basis of looking cishet.

Please tell a trusted adult in your life about the situation with the person trying to get you to call them daddy, I'm worried this person was being predatory towards you, I'm actually really concerned.

@@Ruby-xk8kn I have, they where online and I’m pretty sure they got banned recently

@@Catinthecosmos155 I am very glad you did, stay safe

Hi I don’t mean to come off as disrespectful or rude- but autism isn’t a mental disorder and more of a neurological disorder- meaning it’s a disorder that effects the brain and how it works, different from a mental disorder

@@theclown_underthestairs5082 true, sorry. I should have clarified that more. Personally I see it as a disability or spectrum but ye

I haven't heard many people say they were made for neurdivergents. more people say a lot of neurodivergents use it. (But that's from my personal experience).

I agree for sure. I myself don't /think/ I fall under the spectrum of any of that jazz, but I can understand you for sure. Also, I feel like it's kinda... Invalidating people like me who aren't ND and use neopronouns. As if they are ' for nd people '

@@file_corrupted_7836 thank you

Yeah, I feel like you have to be in such a good place in your transition to be able to do that with confidence. I usually just avoid using the other persons pronouns altogether until I get something that’d give me a clue. “I’m such a Starbucks girl, you have no idea.” - probably she/her *friend of the person comes over* “Oh, Daniel. There you are!” - probably he/him. “My name is Aubrey” - gender neutral name, stick to they/them. *friend pats person on the back* “Reese here is a real chef, they can cook just about anything.” - definitely they/them.

That is true! However I often find that when people even ASK about pronouns it is usually because they are quite open about that themselves and that makes me feel a lot safer around them already ; Just stating them without being asked also would make me a little scared

I often am too scared to introduce myself with my pronouns, but I try to do it if the people I'm talking to give off accepting (and/or queer) vibes-this can also make other people feel more comfortable to volunteer their pronouns.

I would like to point out that constantly having to explain your identity can be exhausting. Sometimes it’s important to take a break from that because it can effect your health in many aspects. Having to explain to people over and over what it means to be trans is annoying and exhausting, because often they want to argue my existence with me rather than learn.

@@apricotbuncakes I feel this. Or when I'm enthusiastic about telling them about it, they shut it down immediately.

some people won’t care either way

@@apricotbuncakes I completely agree that it gets exhausting. But when I don't want to explain, I also lower my expectations, because I know people won't immediately understand and accept my identity, or do research on their own. That's my point, you don't have to explain, but you also can't expect people to accept and understand everything if you don't, you will only frustrate yourself.

I 100% agree. I’m bi and I’m always trying to learn more about other identities when the opportunity arises so that I can educate others one them if they are confused. Side note: something I like to tell others if they are having a hard them learning about a gender identity they may not have before is that you don’t really need to understand it in full detail, just respect the person’s pronouns and name and understand that just because you haven’t personally experienced a thing doesn’t mean that thing isn’t something that someone else can experience.

if "straight passing" works for you then that's cool but a lot of people can be offended by that because they're not straight and especially bi people can face a lot of biphobia (cheating stereotypes) so some people who may appear to be in a straight relationship but one (or both) are not straight then they prefer to use "queer relationship"; tbh, if anyone told me I'm "straight passing" by dating a guy then I'd be so fucking offended b/c I'm not straight so if I had a relationship with a man or a woman then I'd use "queer" to describe it b/c I'm not straight and I'm not a lesbian.

@@novatalking I think the whole point of referring to a relationship as "straight-passing" is that it ISN'T a straight relationship, but it can be perceived as one by an outside observer. This can be an important term when discussing issues that do depend on this outside perception. While this doesn't negate issues that queer people face regardless of how their relationship is perceived, it is undeniable that there are certain obstacles a visibly queer relationship can face which a straight-passing one wouldn't.

Sorry but are you fucking stupid? A guy and a girl in a relationship is always straight.

@@novatalking But if you are a girl and date a guy you're in a straight relationship though

@@nealbrook4226 it is a straight relationship

So how about we stop the essentialist gender bullshit altogether?

I don't think the polysexual flag is that bad, the polyamorous flag though-

Honestly even though I identify with the Non-Binary label due to convenience and nkt finding anything else that fits. I definitely love the idea of it being an umbrella term as well because there's no right or wrong way to be Non-Binary I mean it's so vastly different for different people. Plus the idea you have to have dysphoria to be trans is so outdated and no longer agreed upon by most of the community and scientists alike (for those transmed guys to shut up)

i actually love the colors of the non binary flag 👍

Hi, Cis 👋🏾 lol

So are u male or female.

I completely understand that. I'm currently questioning whether I'm non binary or not but have identified as a woman for all of my 27 years and appear "obviously" as a cis female and I recently went to an lgbt+ group and we all asked everyone their pronouns and it was such a nice change from the norm

I was afraid of him saying he doesn't like neopronouns lol

@@tiredghost_irl lol same😂

Good friend!

your "friend" is obviously uneducated on it lol what are your neo pronouns if you still use them?? Mines He/Xe/Clown/It!

Luckily, my friends respect any individual person’s gender because although they made fun of neos once they were talking about Meowbahh, a lot of people when trying to insult other people talk about things negatively when usually they’d see it neutrally or positively.

yes!

I respect other peoples pronouns but I don’t get why they are so important. What word/words other people use to refer to me doesn’t define who I am.

@zyumi del rey .｡*♡ It seems like many people think that since they care so much about their pronouns. I’m just trying to understand.

@zyumi del rey .｡*♡ Thank you for putting up with me. Yes I will in fact do more research. I want to be able to fully understand it.

Wouldnt giving infinite possibilities to choose create even greater confusion tho?

I agree with you honestly. Even better, it should be common practice to introduce yourself to people with your name and pronouns like we tend to in queer spaces. Then trans people can participate or not participate without feeling singled out.

I just ask everyone their pronouns or check roles.

I think it can be better for people (especially cis people) to state their own pronouns when introducing themselves (instead of asking for others'). That then establishes that people can/should include their pronouns in their introduction, which makes it easier for people who will probably get misgendered if they don't introduce their pronouns to do so without singling themselves out.

as a cis person, I would introduce myself with pronouns but there are still people out here who would take offence. I don't care about them not liking me, but I may actually be hurt or screamed at just for saying that to a stranger, and so that's why I don't often do it... all it takes is one transphobe.

When people ask me for my pronouns it makes me feel like I’m not passing. So that’s why I don’t like being asked for my pronouns. Also, you have to remember that the majority of society is cis, and asking some one with a super masculine or feminine appearance seems kind of pointless. If I meet someone who is androgynous or if I think they might be trans I’ll ask, but that again goes back to my original statement where I hate being asked because I worry people can tell I was born different than how I’m trying to appear.

The only issue with GSRM is it excludes identities such as aromantic people or just anyone who only feels platonic attraction

​@@ChaosqueenMaddy Aspec are sexual and romantic minorities.... Why wouldn't they be included?

People are always going to be excluded from generalities for simplicity sake, it's kinda just how it works unfortunately.

@@ChaosqueenMaddy it really doesn't. As an ace-spec person myself, I find that GSRM is way more inclusive and makes me feel better, because there aren't bigots who can argue that the letter that represents my group means something else entirely (I am so tired of the 'A' is for ally bs and GSRM makes it so I don't have to think about the idiots oof the world as much).

@@nattiberrington Yeah, thats fair

I love the colours of the flag: purple is my favourite colour. I like the agender flag but I rather the non binary flag (I’m agender/non binary).

yessss i love the "its our trash" part of this like yes!! it isnt the cutest flag AT ALL!! and yes!! i have a pillow with that flag anyway!!

The only part I don't like about the Non-Binary flag is the yellow. I don't really like the colour yellow. That's it.

Glad the bi flag actually has my fav colors. Makes me appreciate being bi just a teeny tiny bit more.

i'm nonbinary and i can't relate i really do not like the colors which is why i don't use nonbinary themed accessories in any of my picrews 💀

I understand how you feel it makes me feel like I’m instantly being clocked

Personally feel the opposite. It makes me feel good that they took the time to ask, and it tells me that my sex isn’t obvious, which is nice. If they need to refer to me and it’s a situation where I’m not in danger bc of being trans, then I’d much prefer to be asked then have someone assume and me feel dysphoric and have to correct them

Is it best to try to avoid pronouns and only use names if unsure? Or just use they/them? I want to make sure I'm not hurting anyone.

It sounds like in this specific situation the person was happy you asked! Another commenter suggested offering your pronouns when you introduce yourself first, and then if the other person wants to share theirs, they will feel more comfortable doing so and not so singled out.

My overall take is that we should try to stick to at least some umbrella terms, otherwise the category of gender and any subcategories of sexuality will devolve into meaninglessness. I think the argument should either be in favor of abolishing gender(which is something I'm not entirely on board with yet), or maintaining a gender spectrum with M/F and then NB and removing the stigma and stereotypes associated with them(which is something I lean towards agreeing with more). Maybe abolishing gender is the logical step forward after removing stigma and stereotypes, but gender itself still has utility for like 95% of the human population, so I'm not entirely sure.

awesome! hope it makes you happy!