Many people in narcissistic spectrum relationships are extremely injured by the time it gets to a point of therapy. It would be nice to see a video that helps set some general boundaries in preparation for therapy. I've been married 22 years. I just moved out of my house last week. I've read five books on narcissism including rethinking narcissism. Unfortunately because I am codependent and have abandonment issues growing up with seven dads and five moms and every category of abuse, I have pretty much done all of the things that you're not supposed to do to a narcissist when I finally lash out and stand up for myself but in a very angry and unhealthy manner. It becomes so difficult for people who have been in these relationships for so long to control their emotions when it gets to that point where the fuse is gone. Just explosions. I believe I can hear my wife crying out from deep inside the pain she went through growing up. I got so much counseling and different perspectives with so many parental figures, that has helped me learn a lot of coping mechanisms to not be a victim or a byproduct of my past. However, I hurt my wife. I break her heart. It doesn't matter to me whether the anger is justified because they are injured with something they cannot bridle or take hold of, then I see therapy for me just as important it is for her if my goal is truly to fix our relationship. My wife and I are getting into arguments that I can't honestly believe people would get into arguments for and they last for days with no reflection. She screamed at me for an hour for stealing her purse last week because she knows she set it down and was swearing at me and cussed me out and flipping me off and all in front of our kids. Of course I eventually interrupted and I have a very fast brain, and started with mocking comments of get ready for the non-apology I'm going to get when you find out I didn't steal your purse. Nobody that has a heart with empathy accuses and judges to such the degree that you are with any concern that they might be out of line. Then of course she finds her purse, found out she threw the dirty clothes on top of her purse when she told our son to put the clothes in the dirty laundry and my 15-year-old son let my My wife know that he's the one that lost her purse. There was no apology. Then I was stonewalled for three days because I wanted one or some sort of contriteness. I have worked very hard and God is brought me a very long way to avoid being a by-product of my past childhood. I won custody of my autistic son completely on my own with no attorney when I was single. I have four boys, married for 22 years, and at this point consider where I am at a gold medal compared to where I could have been in the damage I could have done to any family I would have if I did not get the help I needed when I was younger and have the Lord in my life. All of my boys, including my autistic son are all far more successful and far more mature than I was at their age. My autistic son has already kept His job 5 years longer than I even had a job from 16 to 26. However, I cannot express the atomic bomb that I sense is about to go off and destroy it all because my wife is hurting so deeply and in my attempts to help have only accelerated the process, and am too injured to be of any assistance other than a sister becoming worse. So a video that gives tools where two people in a relationship, even for the narcissist, that can set boundaries and preparation for therapy that are simple and pragmatic. I even told my wife that I'll go through narcissism evaluation, because of course she thinks I'm a narcissist and I expected that from what I've read and learned about the disorder. However, it is extremely important for tools and resources to be available for those relationships, like my own marriage, that are literally about to fall into the ocean and both parties are stretched too far to take micro steps without causing further disruption. I had some heartbreaking stories of what she has done to me, but as a Christian and seeing what rejection and abuse can do to a person, I do see my wife in there crying out for help while ignoring the ladder that's in the hole where she is at the same time, but there is a desperation in her voice. I have gotten to the point where I've gone no contact now for the last 5 days. I am highly codependent with severe abandonment issues, so you can understand how insane I am going right now, especially when you add 10 years worth of stonewalling and unresolved issues that I've had and her ability to stonewall for days as easy as water flowing downstream. I'm afraid anything I do or attempt at this point, because of my eruptions and blow-ups in the past are only going to be seen as a manipulative attempt for self worship, or mind control, or whatever label she throws in there. So I don't even know how to take the right approach anymore and no contact is the first time I've ever done this and I have no idea what's at the end of this process. I'm looking forward to your other videos but I have to be honest, my marriage is come to the point where it's like the parable Jesus told about Lazarus and the rich man where the rich man just wanted a drop of water from the torment and he would be satisfied. I am not saying my wife is the torment where she is tormenting me. I'm saying the loss of what we were and what we have built and the feeling of our marriage ending and as I walk away knowing I couldn't do anything more, I'm still walking away from someone that desperately needs to know they are allowed to have value and it can be found in our imperfections.

Great example of a narcissist, he just now knocked a glass of the kitchen counter and blamed me because I set it there, he is NEVER to blame for ANYTHING

Money is what keeps me away from treatment but my child is the reason I'm watching this video right now. Don't want my child to suffer the consequences of my decisions in life

My husband and I have been married for 32 years and he now admits he's a Narcissist and on top of that he's Bipolar too. And he's only getting worse. But through prayer and meditation on my part, I'm learning how to deal with it and live on with him. But it's extremely stressful at times and I do not want to take any meds whatsoever so I'm trying to educate myself on all this so that I can hold on to the little bit of joy I still have in me. But like I said it's not easy! I feel like I'm walking on eggshells when I'm with him. I have to watch what I say, how I respond, react and hates when I sigh and so on and so on. I'm exhausted 😫 I just feel like there's no end to this. So I'm praying for a miracle and patiently waiting.

I started therapy as a result of situational depression. In the course of 2 months, it became apparent I was operating from a place of co-dependency. Needless to say, once I started working on that ... and strengthening my boundaries and sense of self, it enraged my NPD partner. Natural end to an unnatural relationship. So grateful for the wake up call.

I tend to attract these self-serving people, they are takers, I feel used and so true as a child I was the server of my parents.

I have been told I am an empath. He is a narcisist. I am always in pain. It is not a healthy combination. But we do love each other. But its difficult and painful and most of my marriage I feel lonely. But I do not want to leave, because I do love him. I loved him for a long time before I actually understood he was narcisistic, so running away does not feel the right thing to do, just because I can put a title on it now. But it is a very difficult relationship for ME. I hope to find a way to live with it and have a peaceful future. Its so hard though. Sometimes I just say I am sorry, when its him that should be apologising . But I just want a peaceful life. I am 18 years into the relationship. Thats a huge investment. I just want peace.

I can tell you that once you grow you’re standards and address your codependency issues everything will change.

Thank you, it’s one of the few videos that doesn’t make me feel inferior, stupid for not wanting to leave my husband. Thank you again.

first step, cut ties, permanently the second step is, that you make sure that you live in distinct cities and social circles cut ties with everybody that are in merged circles the third step is: don't contact anyone like this ever again

Dr. Fox, It costs 160.00 per hour to see a psychologist. Then to be asked to purchsse the book co dependant no more ..... KZfaq is a Godsend and you are very generous to offer your help here for free... Thank you

Listening today again I cannot wait for more imagine how much people are missing out on you are spot on in my opinion. I so hope and pray more people find out about your channel.

I was dumped in hospital he showed off his new girlfriend to me like it was the most natural thing in the world. I think the person I loved disappeared long ago.

I met someone who abuses and manupilate in the name of love.he give silent treatment and want me to beg.trying to forget all those bad incidents.hard as they are so addictive .

Thank you Dr Fox for these videos. They are extremely helpful to me and others. They should teach some of these things in school. So much grief would be stopped

Thanks so much. I just found your videos and they're exactly what I need right now...Hope. Thank you.

Yes, thank u, Dr. Fox for helping people for free. This is invaluable information for hurting people who truly need it. May God richly bless u!

This doesn't help the Narccisistic person. It helps other normal people avoid them

It's their victims that change they wake up and realise they are getting nothing from their lives with a narcissist

I was adopted and was the scapegoat of the family of 5 children. My narc mother used triangulation between myself, my sister (her blood) who is disabled and herself. People used to say I was beautiful looking which caused my sister and mother's jealousy. My mother would do things like put me down so my sister could see and my sister's delight would be the payoff for my mother. She would give her all the pretty things. Anyhow, I have realized I have an ingrained belief that I am an inferior female and it is this pathway that was forged before him that my narc partner uses to put me down. Having this understanding helps.

I left. He was not gonna change. I fried the day I made the decision - not over the relationship ending but how foolish that I had been hoping for a change. 30 yrs I spent with that man because we had children and I did not want them from a broken home. I have harmed the children. I have apologized to my daughters and have asked them to be aware and hopefully they can break the cycle. I was a stay at home mother. I went back to work when my last child went off to school. I have been on my own now for four years. Recovering and trying to make sense of my life. I came across a video one day and then I started doing research. I know that I cannot diagnose him but I am certain that he is a vulnerable narcissist from what I have seen and read and the thirty years of living with him and the patterns of behaviour

Thanks for your message.

Great how you put down the reasoning of this question! Thanks! :)

This was very helpful. Thank you.

Great videos and insights. Thank you very much from the other side of the planet.

Great content. Thank you

Thank you.

My partner is a narcissist. It took me the 3 years that we have been together to finally figure out what was wrong. We love each other very much, and he does not realize how much pain he causes me emotionally. He has a team of "flying monkeys" (narc cheerleaders) who put him on a pedestal. He is also extremely charming and charismatic so as a result has lots of friends. That being said, he often gas lights, and I can never have my own opinion or perception on a situation. He also deliberately tries to make me jealous of other women. He makes crude jokes about my body that make me just about want to cry.

I wish I had asked myself these questions years ago

Yes I've found value in the fantasy relationship and that value is videos like these presented by Dr. Fox. I've not had an explanation/definition of codependency that I completely understood until now. I'm learning a great deal about myself and the individuals that I'm attracted to and VV.

Thank you, I watch all your videos....

I was married for 11 years, not even knowing that my husband's harmful behavior had a name... For various reasons, I couldn't leave this relationship and I suffered in silence, and cried every single night just trying to stay sane despite the frequent blow-ups and humiliating words he thrown at me, and trying to keep our child away from all that. When I finally found out that was a condition called narcissism, I was devastated, on the verge of severe depression. I saw no future ahead of us, because people just don't change, do they...? Nor the narcissists are willing to admit anything or undergo any therapy. But today, a year after I found out there was absolutely no hope,...I can say I am a happy woman, and my husband (the very same husband, who nearly 'killed' our family life) is a dear, loving and caring, very sweet and funny man. He's become a wonderful companion, he learns to be more and more patient and keeps fixing everything that was broken in our life due to his past behavior. Sounds unbelievable, doesn't it? But it really happened. I am a living example of a classical narcissist's victim who was saved and healed. How did it happen? My husband's heart was touched and changed completely by the unbelievable mercy and love of Jesus Christ, because our family and friends kept praying for us, not even knowing all the horrible details of his behavior. The power of Jesus is real - He can have an incredible influence on your life if you invite Him to your heart. He does love us so much... I will underestimate the power of prayer never again. Dear soul, whoever you are reading this - if you struggle with a narcissistic abuse in your family, or any other personal tragedy, of course go search for help and therapies, but also open your own heart and find a congregation where people can support you and pray together with you to the Lord. Trust His promise: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11,28) "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." (John 3,16) God bless you!

First, I want to give major props to those who have narcissism for getting help with it, and please don't confuse my personal experience as me saying ALL are like the severity level I'm about to mention while keeping it as generalized as I can. WOW, you're spot-on. I'm still too terrified to discuss it on a forum due to the severity of it was bc of extreme stalking and other VERY disturbing behaviors that I'd only seen in movies. I had NO CLUE at the beginning. Thanks for understanding -- it means a lot.

Neglect, verbal abuse, constant dissatisfaction, followed by fly by love bombs. Lack of peace love harmony.

There's an island called Narcissistic Island where all narcissists go to live, forever. This is the dream.

The guy I’m talking to seemed very genuine and that’s how i fell in love with him he said his wife cheated on him and she left kind of disappeared on him for a while and that’s why he hadn’t gotten a divorce because he couldn’t get a hold of her but they are separated so I decided to continue talking to him he told everyone he had a 4 yr old daughter who died in a car crash but I found his wife’s fb and turns out the “dead daughter” is very much alive and not even his biological daughter it’s just his step daughter and I caught him texting other girls and he Denys it even when I show him the evidence of it he was in the military he claims he has diagnosed depression/ anxiety /PTSD& adhd but I’m sure adhd wouldn’t make you lie to the extent he has I’m so confused to what he has because it sounds like he has both narcissism and bpd or im confused because he can apologize but he blames me for it so it’s like ??? His lies sound so honest lol he blocked me everywhere except on a game we play and he sends me gifts on the game and I’m sure it’s to get my attention the reason he blocked me was because I told him I know all the truth (I told him I know his daughter doesn’t exist) he never replied but he still sends me gifts on the game I send them back to him because I’m not mad at him for being sick with this mental illness if he has it but I wanna see what he has to say (I told him I wouldn’t question him) but idk

Good plan in theory. My only problem is that my narcissist is also uneducated and redefines every agreement I attempt to set as well as the most simple words. The time required to "prove" those agreements work and have benefits is the exact thing that is necessary for him to stall enough to twist the expectations and make me seem like I'm being a "smart ass" We're gay btw idk if that makes a difference.

I could sure use some honest advice and feedback. Long story short, I have been married to someone who has narcissistic traits. About 2 months ago we attended our 19th marriage counseling session together. At that session I told my wife that somehow our marriage needs to drastically get better quickly, or I feel we need pull the plug and end our marriage since we have been going to marriage counseling for far longer than we probably should have been going; and not much, if anything, has improved. Part of me was hopeful that this was going to be the warning shot and my wife would finally hear me; that she would finally understand that I am done with the narcissistic type of behavior, done with the mean comments, the high level of control, and being made out to feel like I am never doing the right thing, never doing it quickly enough, etc. Unfortunately, the few weeks after that counselling sessions things did not improve, they actually seemed worse. For example, one morning I started her car so it was warm for her when she left for work (which I do for her quite often). I wasn’t looking for a pat on the back, but she very rudely said “oh, thank you so much for everything you do”. One day I went and bought a shovel and salt and cleaned the ice from the sidewalk. Instead of getting any type of thanks or appreciation, she told me that it is so interesting that I had time to go to Dollar General (which is about 3 miles from our house) and buy a new shovel and salt. I got criticized for doing laundry and putting in on ‘her side’ of the bed and not having it moved off of the bed so she could lay down at night without having to touch laundry. I got criticized for having the space heater on in the living room. I got criticized for eating all the lasagna; when in fact I put it in a Tupperware container so she could take it in her lunch. I got questioned on going for a walk along the river. It was just relentless verbal attacks. By no means am I a perfect husband, I am far from it, and I have made plenty of mistakes, but I have always tried to be loving and supportive and take care of her and our kids. I have dealt with this type of narcissistic behavior for a very long time. Just another example, I recently learned why I was in severe pain for a couple of days this past summer; I was passing a 6mm kidney stone. While I was in pain, I got in a hot bath to try and alleviate some of the pain. I recall vividly her making a mean comment that I was in the bath while she was doing something for the kids. I have agonized over the decision for many months, and probably years now, but about 5 weeks ago I asked for divorce and have been moved out since that time. She said it wasn’t fair and that I blindsided her, even though we have attended those 19 marriage counseling sessions together; I reluctantly agreed to separation for now. For the last five weeks, I have been buried in loving texts, pictures of our kids and of some fun memories in the past, she sent me the wedding song that we danced too, she has been sending me quotes from the bible, she asked that I listen to various books on making marriages work, etc; she asked that I meet with our Deacon at church and attend a church marriage weekend retreat. She has buried me in a variety of ‘tactics’ to try and get me back home; she has thrown our vows in my face multiple times and said that I am destroying the kids by moving out. I have been holding strong and have not caved by moving back in; recently she has been all over the board with her comments and emotions. Seems silly talking about, but we own a car and a truck. For the last 5 weeks I have drove the truck and she has had the car. A couple of days ago she said she wants the truck, which is no problem, but I asked her why; she said she doesn’t need to answer why, she just wants it. She said she plans on keeping the truck for a few weeks since its not fair that I got to drive it for a few weeks (I don’t know the intentions of this, other than some form of power play, or maybe knowing if she has the truck, I won’t be able to use it to do things I enjoy). She also seems to be getting controlling with the kids; she told me that I am the one who decided to leave them, so its not fair for me to ever get both of our kids overnight while she is alone, since she didn’t decide to leave. I reminded her that I didn’t leave the kids, that I only left her. Shortly after making these types of comments, she follows up with a load of very nice loving texts. This is all extremely hard for me, because she occasionally acts nice and says she is willing to try and change, but seems all over the place with her comments and emotions; I’m afraid I will fall back into the trap. I worry greatly about our kids, I feel she is subjecting them to a ton of sadness and possibly emotional manipulation, with the intentions being of playing the victim card in front of the kids and trying to make them feel bad for her and make me out to look like the bad guy (she told me she is always crying in front of the kids…and even yesterday when I saw her she cried multiple times in front of the kids). Even though I asked for divorce, I still do not wish her unhappiness; I just want everyone to get along and be nice and supportive with everyone. To make matters even more frustrating, yesterday she told me she was offered a job in Michigan (about 5 hours from where we currently live in Ohio). I am settled here in Ohio now, have a good job here, etc. I am happy for her that she was offered the job, I know that is more what she wants to do versus her current job, so that part makes me happy; but come on, wanting to relocate now while we are separated. I feel like she is doing everything she can to try and make things difficult for me, especially with our 2 kids. Random place to insert this comment….but I just thought it was odd; she claims to want the marriage to work, but considering uprooting to Michigan. I manage all of our finances, yesterday she said she wants all of our bank account log in information. Which is fine, no problem, it is both of our money; I just thought it was a little odd. Not sure the intentions behind it. Maybe just wanting to see how much is there, if I have been taking any, what I have spent money on; who knows?! Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated.

Dr. Fox, is there any more videos for this particular series?

We have had an unhealthy relationship from Pre marriage. He was abusive and it was the classic crazy cycle. I finally had enough. I’m focused on me. I was neglected as a child and have C Ptsd. I’m working on getting healing for me. I guess if he wants marriage counseling he’ll set some up. In the mean time it’s lonesome. But I’m building myself a support network of friends healers counselors. Praying it will get me through. Therapy for my trauma starts next week. 🙏🏼💕

You can’t change others so I changed myself. I am mindful that you can’t win a fight with a narc. I keep my answers short if I respond at all. Made the mistake of marital therapy and the therapist fell for her victim mentality.

Sounds perfect. It is the finances.

Thank you so much for these valuable pieces of understanding dr. I would like to ask a question: Can an empathic person possess the narcissistic traits passed on through childhood?

Thank you, greating from Hamburg, Germany!!!!!!!!!!

I am tired of ruining these beautiful souls that come into my life. I need to fix or get a handle on this disorder.

Thank you so much for this video. I found this to be very helpful. I love my husband more than anything after 18 years of "on and off agains" and am still going strong today trying to find common ground so that our family can have peace and everyone be truly happy. I spend so much time pretending to be happy and I just hope that I can learn to help him for our happily ever after.

Thank you. QUESTIONS: 1) Is there an age limit for such a therapy? 2) Do you think a therapy can bring something to the wife of a narcissist with 88 years of age, suffering from her husband with narcissistic personality disorder and 90 years of age?

dr, fox can you help me with counseling?

Do you ever consider doing a promo bono client? Because I feel as if maybe we could help each other because my boyfriend & I would/could be a perfect case study. I'm pretty sure that he is on the extreme end of the Cluster B disorders, I just can't quite put my finger on which one he is. However, I have also learned that most likely I have my very own disorder &maybe I just have a hard time seeing that it could possibly be more my fault because I make him worse sometimes. We could really use the help before one of us ends up being very hurt, behind bars, or even dead. I just can't afford to go to therapy. Any suggestions or information will be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Was part 2 ever posted? Can’t find it :/

I've just thrown my partner out. He never looked after me abuse the police losing my job as a nurse the list goes on

Excellent video! New subscriber🌞.

It costs me my happiness and the chance at doing better and being w someone better.

I need help. I am a covert narcissist and don't know what to do. I believe in myself to escape this well trenched path . I seek light.. only to end in dark . There is nothing left of me but a mask.. i lost everything. I know the is hope somwere My gf sees this and struggles to help me but I keep gas lighting and draining her . Why can't I feel....

Been almost 3 years and i always thought mayb our ages is why she isnso difficult to deal with im 36 she is 25 and out the gate she lead me into the relationship when i told her if she wasnt serious bout a relationship we can remain friends of course she said she wanted us n within the first month r 2 i caught her n lies secrets met men that she told me was friends but she had relationship with! I hurt badly especially after walkin away 10 years with another toxic woman but it was too late i was n love! She promised she want lie no more etc n i believed her cuz her family was saying cuz shes young even tho my gut told me different! Well now we almost 3 years n she refuses to admit any wrong she done n of pushed she shut downs n what i found out stonewalls me n now we fight every other day

Looking for part 2, etc.... Link?

What to do if you are black sheep of narcissistic family. I try to keep no contact with my family now. It has since then given me much peace but at the same time I need some close human connection.

Get the free online book Stop Walking on Eggshells. Listen to it every day.better still listen to Meredith Miller on KZfaq- breaking the trauma bond. Also the Little Shaman on KZfaq. After 9 solid months of listening to these podcasts everyday I’ve finally broken the bond with my bpd / narcissist ex. He has come hoovering me back up but I’m finally strong enough to do right by myself for my self. Step 1 of healing and recovery- stop making them more important than yourselves. Good luck 🤞

I really wish this is true...I have BPD and I fell for a man with NPD! The sparks fly but he got scared of something...and even if he's attracted to me and we had the hottest kiss and dance, I was gutted when he told me it couldn't work between me and him...it's been a few months and I'm still replaying this moment in my head over and over, still feeling the heat of the moment...I'm just haunted by him now and I cant get him out of my head and I can still feel him and it's driving me insane!

Do narcissists typically get bored quickly in relationships? Could that be an identifying characteristic of narcissism?

If i knew answers to all these fundamental questions in this video then why would i go for any therapy or treatment

This information might help build a basis to reflect upon to stabilize your own sanity while also learn how to survive being stuck in mire of someone’s narcissistic behavior and the yo yo ride

How do I find part 2

it’s way to hard for me to explain the reason i’m considering treatment. i don’t think she would go. but basically she destroyed my career and now it bothers her. in a walking reminder of what she did and i’m willing to forgive her because i believe everything happens for a reason. fyi i has an amazing job and now i’ll never work in that line of work again.

Narcissist, Borderline, Antisocial & Histrionic Treatment is simple: Human- Sacrifice. They'll sacrifice partners, friends, co-workers, family, strangers, children & everyone, EXCEPT their self!

In the beginning things were going well and as yrs went by things happened, normal and otherwise but my life started to change drastically, I lost my career, lost my education, lost alot of my health and if that wasn't strain enough I had a child have a seizure and developed autism, then my brother died, then a child leaving the nest for first time and then a move to a different state and a death, then a nother brother died and then a mom fig my aunt died, then my lil bro died and then my best friend then another friend. In that time he took a job 600 mi away with a promise if working from home for 6 no but it was permanent and he tried to split time between here and there and not take pay cut to be at home but did it without asking me. I remained behind to finish raising 4 of our 7 kids, no help and him living his own life elsewhere and then the excuse for not being back more was he has to help his parents ( she's a narcissist also and has caused so many many issues) and I have finally reached a place where there is no me anymore. I'm not the person I used to be and I no longer have the energy to deal with him or mom and he doesn't want a divorce he says counseling but then refuses to go. I mean enough. Even if doesn't want help I'm broken and I need sowm glue. I worry one day I'm going to crack and idk what that looks like and I don't wanna find out. So many issues and things thatve happened and I'm just empty. Please tell me that this makes sense and I'm not being petty or rediculous or childish!

Do you do online therapy?

Doc Fox, my husband and I have so much to share eventually. CPTSD in me can't even make a sentence and his total mesh with malignant npd mother has his now known bpd self totally swallowed. But I must say this to couples seeking answers for sudden changes in partner and it appearing to be npd. Be careful not to assume that and don't tell them reality of what they are causing you to feel more than once without them recognizing it outloud themselves etc. It could be a npd in their life that they have surely developed a bpd after years of said npd abuse and the fact that you will dare take what that npd has always had and must have to survive will unleash evil without bounds naming you enemy 1 and never stop. You will make it worse and doom poor partner of yours by even speaking reality with words, they are aggression to npd. Causing the bpd partner with npd traits, totally treatable and ok...along with the npd consistently using all sorts lies and techniques you couldn't even think is possible especially if it is the mother of partner have no ability to not see you as enemy of them because they hear such coming from your mouth too. and i regret that harm i can't erase. Today he just showed up though and quietly watched doc fox with me choosing npd mother and son topic. There is hope finally. please forgive any mistakes,

"treatment" sound like something you do to a hunk of metal before you paint it :P

@Dr. What drove me was I was thinking on taking my life over and over.because his abuse distroyed me and would never discuss any thing he did to me. So it put me in mental prison I could not get any resolve.and it made me want to end my life.But the Lord Jesus never allowed me to go there.went to 3 councilers were o help had me talk that's it .when , I needed answers.I did not know about narcs till 2012, 15 years after leaving him34 years. . When I did a Google on rageholics after a bad time with one of his adult kids Attacked me 6days when came to visit me. I finely broke and put her out of my house .that's when I found out what I was dealing with.cryed for months.but said finely I know . Now know both kids have it as well. Nearly broke me knowing .what I tried to stop happened anyway With the kids.but God has showed me anew way to pray and deal Im working on it .Seeing some good signs so far🔑😊🤔✝️🙏🏻praise God.

Ive been confused for a long time he is in denial and blames me and everything or everyone else for us arguing and we're we are I've been self reflecting and researching how we got here narcissist most definitely describes him it's getting worse but he says nothing is wrong with him I'm so emotionally drained and don't know what to do

Wow, i noticed he would use certain phrases that i coukd tell he learned fom therapy. He loves his therapist. He wantrd me to go see her, really insisted but i felt weird about it so i und my own. I have a feeling hes either twisting everything have a victim role with her to feel validated or shes a really awful therapist and enabling him . I thought about going to one session just to see. I also had a theory since hed been in therapy for 5 years but b4 we were together n now he's back in therapy that he knew she knows how effed up he is and she could take care of my trauma whilst not being able to reveal what my trauma stemmed from. I believe he doesn't want to be the way that he is and he wanted to keep me as supply as long as possible cuz i waz very doting. so she'd somehow maybe coach me. Its a fuct up mental olympic theory but after i asked him to take Accountbility n declined to see his therapist (not couples therapy mind you, just solo) i said i found another therapist. he then went silent treatment its been bout 2months. He's really done some ethically n morally bankrupt things towards me in a bizness we were apart of just recently. but it blew up in his face. It actually helped me move on quicker, to see he was capable of such treachery. thats his true colors and not the person i fell in love with at all.

My husband agreed to marital counseling and right out of the gate he patently lied. Where do you go from there? Ugh...

There is nothing to be gained as I have lost too much. Its not a normal one. They are self serving I think my father may have been a, narcissist. My poor mum bringing up six children the minute he would come home it was shouting and we were crying. Even in my highchair as a, toddler I remember the arguments

I have a partner with bod someone please help me I’m running out of ideas I got her the bdp book by dr Daniel fox and she hasn’t read it it’s been here a few days now I haven’t said anything about that now today we was speaking about me leaving the company to start my own thing and there is no compromise from her side it’s not as simple as she think and she does nothing but give me grief about it now when it gets like this she can say things that do not need to be said now I’m trying to get my own business running to free up time to put back into her and her bpd so the situation was gettin a little bit heavy so I said I’m going for a cigarette and then she began to shout stuff to me about walking the dogs and clean both of which I have done so I said stop saying things that are not helping the situation and then she switches to how I won’t say nothing to my boss when he gives me grief (which I do and she’s clearly not there in my work place) and when she’s giving me grief I voice my opinion and she seems to think I have more respect for my boss then her which is not in anyways true this situations IS. pushing me away from her but we have two children to who are achieving a lot so I wouu UK is like to work through bc this which she would untill she becomes triggered and after deciding to give it 5 if a topic gets a bit hard and I did the right thing to be told I’m doing the wrong thing and it ain’t good enough now I know there are some areas I need to work on personally but I feel like this is a two way street and she needs to get herself in order to be able to work through things together but at times it becomes impossible because of her attitude towards things even more so if she don’t like what she hears or what is being said then she starts to say thing about what I’m not doing when I am for example washing the dishes and being told I don’t help out I do try me best but I feel like I need more help to get these situations flowing in and out of life with less emotional heart ache anyone’s opinion will be greatly appreciated as I just want to help me partner to become better at dealing with her bpd

I believe in god to help change my partner

Don't try to understand them just leave don't drain urself for them they don't know what love is 😑

i can’t figure out if i’m with a narcissist or not. i think she is and her additions say yes but other good actions wane me to say, no she’s not a narcissist.

How do I fix or get out of my relationship

I wasnt know that I am with relationship with necessity person for 4 years she hurted me I want hurt her back so bad

Can narcissist get ever better can he/she accept the treatment?

It's very painful and it's more than I can take I just know if I could talk to her and ask her if she still wants help. I didn't understand this odd evil thing inside her. It came out and said I have no emotion to give you. Like what then appearance changed in a mask I'm not joking hockey masks like Jason I was sunned but Holloween I thought oh a costume I about grabbed it but it keeps falling like a sheet of paper every time I tried to touch it. then I saw a troll the face was black like darkness with other debris and it told me I've been discarded is this a joke like punched but oh when I looked in her eyes a moment before changed I saw the devil's eyes if their ice blue glowing. What are talking about I heard a whisper and crying with her face appearing flipping from troll to her own and said I don't desire you anymore so she ghosts me? I looked out to see her drive off the police came asked me if I choked her she said she was unconscious and the police were debriefing I could hear them well she doesn't have any marks and said some other b/s to make me look like a manic. this was a month ago I have no close again we talked about this and last month she told me next time I won't let you go. I said for six or seven months I was so lost n hurt I didn't know who or what to do so I move on until I found someone and told her I wanted to see if she wants me or I got a new girl coming and she said she still loves me and I stayed but we made a contract of never breaking due to anger and everything covered but this is tough i am in hell

Mine says, if you want to be my girl.... you need to get a thicker skin.

Is it possible for a narcissist to get help and change?

They detroy u.

We were Married for 10year with a child. I gave up a lot for her to become a faithful house wife. My narcissistic wife was still threatening to file a divorce and take custody of my Child because. I knew she was cheating and also into illegal things. I had no papers so I cleaned to have money, my boss son told me about this guru he was the only one i could call to, want to be free from narc abuse to hi s name above.

I have zilch clue whatever possessed me to watch this knowing damn well my ass is single. 💔 🥀

Can a stubid narcissist really Change???

I appreciate the videos and knowledge you share, but I do have one critique. I find it much more comfortable when we're at the same eye level. As it is here, I feel like I'm sitting in a chair, and you're standing over me, and I'm having to look up at you the entire time. If you don't like sitting and prefer to stand in front of that wall, raising the camera would be helpful. For me at least lol Just my 2 cents.

I agree that both people need therapy!

Emotionless creature...nothing less nothing more no empathy..so no emotion

This is my story of being engaged to a narcissist and then "left at the alter" kzfaq.info/get/bejne/mMyHp8KC0a3QeqM.html It was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life, but also one of the best things that ever happened to me NOT to marry him!

This was a wonderful video, unfortunately I believe my wife to have this disorder. We have tried couples counseling several times and failed. We are separated now for four weeks, after 20 years and have two beautiful children together. She is seeing a therapist now, I hope and pray he/she can properly diagnose her disorder.

Omg come to the point

First step get rid of the person !!!!

You never explained

Quit mistaking narcissism with an unclean spirit. PRAY.

Are you mad blaming people who are abused by Narcissists ????!!!!!!

I really want to listen but I can't handle the breath in lips suck. Omfg it's maddening bye

I cannot listen to the loud swallowing, tongue slapping and verbal noises.