"When we were children we had this concept of who we were going to be as an adult and I think a lot of us are ready to arrive, as that person, and look back at our childhood self and say I hope you are proud of me" when I tell you this hit home and touched my heart! Thank you🎉 I truly believe the foundation of style is knowing yourself and standing confidently in that. The rest is mechanics of dressing to flatter your body and express yourself.

Simply brilliant and freeing, Queen Cookie! I love, love, love, and love your clearly stated definition of personal style. Style is personal and this video is about the “emancipation/liberation” of freeing one’s style to emerge without the noise of others. Slam dunk! You accomplished your mission in this video. ❤❤❤❤❤❤

Wow this is probably the simplest and imo best personal style video I came across. I realized I myself show up different to different occasion even if some basic pieces/textures/ structures overlap. I’m going to start writing my style personalities down and see where I overlap in my looks.😊

As a former New Yorker all I wore was black and I love the color even in Florida. The other thing is that your haircut (which was also mine years ago) lends the level sophistication you are portraying now. Kuddos!🙌🏼💕

I Carolyn,I find it very sad that personal style is dying/dead,and I think mainly because people are influenced by so many platforms and influencers,and a term I actually hate:trends!!It's almost as if we're all attending a Catholic school and wearing the same uniform!! I've had my own style since I was 14,I knew exactly with what suits me;I was never one to be easily influenced,I've always dance to the beat of my own drum!!I love well tailored pantsuits,black,real leather and maxi dresses in the summertime.I stop wearing minis....sexy to me;is backless or strapless dresses or tops!!Also don't matter what or who you're wearing,and how freaking expensive it is.....without confidence,and might as well;were a paper bag!!!

What an excellent message. There are many parts of ourselves and we can dress accordingly. Whew...Thank you.

My style pillars fall between what is affordable, accessible, available and comfortable. And my wardrobe cycles between work, home and recreation (in that order😂).

Stand tall Queen Mother Cookie and unapologetic! Excellent on time message! Love the concept and the way you broke it down. It makes good sense! You are elegant, classy, unique and rock your style personalities. The point is many of us have varying style personalities. We "be" and feel differently on any given day and time. ☺

I never ever ever comment on KZfaq videos, let alone sub to people but your channel I can't not sub. I don't think I've ever laughed consistently or felt as inspired by any other KZfaqr as your channel has! I've only watched your vids for a few months but you always give me something to think about when it's over! ❤

I’ve never been to no aesthetic, I’ve kept the same color palette and style for over 28 years im 49 … I’ve always kept it black white nude with a pop of color maybe in a bag…as far as makeup always nude or red lip it’s always timeless

You were talking to me! After 20 plus years as a lawyer I have found myself shifting my career and lifestyle all at 49! I have been struggling with style, identity and change. Your way makes it less overwhelming and more fun. Thank you!

AGAIN I say "Cookies for Carlos".... LOL it's a movement....😂😂 I digress...LoL honestly I don't think I would be able to function as happily as myself in this world with all of my complexity if I didn't separate the PARTS. And as you said those selves and parts come with different sides of self. So absolutely clothes i.e looks are a part of that change for me. I wonder sometimes how many parts other women have.,..LOL I have 4....LOL

I really love naming your style personalities!!! Each one appear for different reasons and how you wake up feeling that day!!! Love it!!!!

Work / errands me: Loose fitted black or white tee shirt (sometimes cropped at the waist), black or gray wide leg wool pants, cropped bomber jacket and a sneaker. Dinner/Party me: fitted Black or white tees cropped at the waist, sometimes with a cutout somewhere or a top that ties in the back, tanks, button ups, blazers, wide leg jeans, black leather square toe mules or boots, sterling silver chain, and a mini bag.

❤❤I like the idea of identifying your style based on all the roles we have in our lives!+

This was so helpful. I think that that style personalities is so spot on. I retired and need to discover who that personality is. It has been expensive because I have been so confused and needing to let go the person I had been showing up as for the past 20 years. As a former teacher, I wanted to be comfortable, professional, but also I am highly creative. I am transitioning to the new me and your video really helped me make this clear that I do not need to look professional any more. I am most myself in a denim or silk ( any color) maxi skirt with a black tee or black statement top, statement gold earring and a artsy necklace. I love this look and have always loved it. But I did not want to look like I was wearing the same thing when I was working. One teacher commented that black and denim was too harsh. So I let that influence me and struggled all the time not too look harsh but warm and inviting. So I spent a lot of money not looking like myself. I had allowed the teacher personality to dominate my style. But thank you! I am so clear now. I am about to stop wasting my coin!

What a unique and helpful way to try to find, name and unify our personal style labels! Thank you Carolyn!❤

Picking style pillars has always been confusing for me. Pretty much since high school. I have gone to my closet and said to myself who do you want to be today! Now each personality does have some commonalities which are the basis of my own personal style but every day I get to pick, who I want to be what version of me I’m going to show to the world today!

Style is inevitably about individuality, personality and comfort. not conforming to society; it’s trends, aesthetics, being scared of being judged. Style doesn’t fit in with the crowd but stands out and proudly

Personal style is uniquely personal. There are so many different variations of ourselves depending on our mood, day and circumstances that one style wouldn’t fit us all. So this video C was very spot on! Style all ‘yourselves’👌🏽 🥰

This completely makes sense Carolyn. I feel like my style has evolved from being very colorful years ago to casual elegance. I love neutrals with earth colors. The shades of blues are amazing from light hues to cobalt. Greens are so alive to me. I always enjoy your videos.

This made ONE THOUSAND PERCENT of sense!

This was such a dope way to think about personal style! This is so much easier to think through than describing my style in three words. Side note can we have a video on how to style textures?!

Wowowow I LOVE this concept!! I have tried (and failed time and again) to “define” my style with key words and Pinterest boards. I tried to say “Romantic” is one of my 3 style words because I love intricate embellishments and ultra feminine silhouettes, but the very next day I’m wearing faded jeans and white tee and Birkenstocks to run errands… And I’m standing there like maybe I picked the wrong word?? But THIS makes so much more sense!!! We all show up in different ways depending on what we’re up against within our day. I may now be able to discover commonalities between those different personalities that I embody. And in approaching style through this lens, I feel that I’m not really so far off from making my younger self proud. I am the many different characters I once dreamed about. Sorry this is so rambling! Bravo! This was such an inspiring and well articulated video. A very refreshing take in a highly saturated space. Thank you!

Yes!! The drape is so feminine and sexy! I LOVE wearing draped clothing. Thank you for sharing. 🩷

Rewatching this video for the 2nd time, you gave some really great ideas and I love how you break things down, I'm definitely taking notes and honing in on my personal style more. I do have a very distinct definition of what my style is and I do have separate ideas for different occasions but I never thought of naming them, that's an excellent idea!! Thanks again for another wonderful video and if you're seeing this today then I hope you enjoy the long weekend and had a great week! 🥰

This was so helpful. I was able to breakdown the commonality and differences between my personalities thanks to your list. What I’ve noticed is, I’ve always dressed to be comfy yet chic. I never liked tight fitting clothes, but because I’m slim people told me to show off my shape so I did that for years, I never felt comfortable or confident. Now in my 30’s I feel like little me is sooo proud of how I dress and I’m very confident. Thanks so much for this video it really made sense. ❤️

This was such an amazing video!! You gave me homework! I love when a content creator gives me food for thought. Embraces consciousness and exemplifies the art in clothing. Thank you for all you do 💛

First...I love how you & Carlos interact, it's adorable, lol. Second, I agree with you, I'm sick of people trying to define an "aesthetic", style is what you make it. It's what makes your soul happy & makes you feel GOOD when you put it on your body. I'm not a fan of trends because I know what I like & I'm going to like them regardless of how "on trend" they are. Style is YOUR OWN expression and I want more folks to find that instead of following the "trends"

I just love you! Work Genise is definitely different than weekend, gym and errands Genise, it's time I embrace that.

PS your commentary… on point. You are such a savvy cookie

I soooo identify with your style. Girl you be killing it!!! Never ever doubt that!!! So authentically Virgo!!!!

Or headed there --> that’s me! I don’t think I love clothes or shop like I used to. But I have stuff. I work from home so my style is like your gym look and it’s ok by me. When I go out I like a little pop. I’m quality over quantity kind of lady, except in men in the past 😅😂When are y’all moving?!! I can’t wait to see where you’re going! Continue to be blessed ❤

I knew it from the begining!!! It's very obvious to me that you are a fan of Claire/ Phylicia.

EXCELLENT! I absolutely love the way you broke this down! And what’s crazy is I always asked myself the same question.. like I can’t put my style into a few words bc I have multiple styles. I too am more comfortable in neutral tones and I love draping in my clothing etc. Our styles are def similar which is why I resonate with you and you’re my style guru bestie in my head 😂. The older I get I am so much more free(er) in my styling choices. I wear what feels good to me and exudes confidence. Thank you sooo much for this video!❤❤😊 One of your 🍪, Tammy😊

Makes sense❣️I do have an Airport style.🤔Polished but ultra comfy like a printed poplin dress with big pockets. Hat, Large scarf. Big tote with a smaller bag with essentials I can grab when I go to the lavatory.

This was an excellent way to identify style based on the roles we have/play in life. The various personalities was spot on.

You’re making sense, Cookie!! Thank you for sharing this message. I’ve thought about this a lot lately, as I am someone who shows up dressed differently for events in my life. My work wear is soo laid back because I like to be comfortable and you wouldn’t know that I am a fashionista based on my work attire. This is why I’ve also struggled with creating fashion content here recently because of all of the trends and the niches and things of that nature, and I’m trying to really hone in on my style and what I want to portray.

I’m a beginner in determining my style. This SOOOOO resonated with me. This concept allows my various personalities (which vary slightly depending on the circumstances) to shine. Well done!!!

Love it 🥰 my style is sometime combined , it revolves around home, church, gym, socializing, running errands. Always casual, comfortable, Fly, edgy, lots of texture, combining color, patterns, etc, oh and yes I could name everyone of my style personalities (that would be fun) i would need to sit and write stuff down. I always enjoy your videos. One day I am going to stop being scared and start my channel. Love you, ❤️

Queen Cookie/Big Cookie, this is so poignant! I have various styles as well! Your video hit on the angst I was having over a small haul I did for an upcoming vacation. The clothes I bought are MY style but not for ‘vacation’ Miki. I took them back and got stuff that I can truly relax and galavant in! We don’t need persimmon…just expression! You’re the best ❤❤❤🍪🍪🍪

soo happy to see you on my feed ❤

You totally made sense! I think this is such a more helpful practical approach to personal style. I get the intent behind the three pillars concept, but it always feels a bit too narrow to capture everything about my style. I find that there's usually about 4 to 6 elements that are communing together in various combinations at different times. And this way of mapping it out is a lot more amenable to nailing down all the details.

Yes draped! No one ever says they look for that quality in clothes. It's one of the most important things for me.

I loved this. Thank you!

Makes perfect sense

I am so ridiculous. I like the video while you were still side eyeing Carlos 😂 I just knew I was gonna laugh and feel good with this video ❤

This conversation was very enlightening and I understand and agree with everything you said. I feel like this is the best way to think about style. I wanted to get back to myself in the late 90s when my style was not influenced by sooo much. It was very much just ME! I can appreciate this conversation.

So glad to see you this morning!!! I love your videos ❤

Love love love your style

This was a good exercise! Thanks ❤

I found this so informative.

Good morning Darling!! Yes with a new video🎉

This was very interesting. Many thanks.

You nailed this. Perfection. Thanks a lot.

Loved this video as ALWAYS! As a child our personal style came from our parents but now since we are adults our style is how we feel ❤ BTW I love you and Carlos it reminds me lot of my husband and I 😅

This is a great video! It is very timely for me ❤

not tomato patch aesthetic 😭 that's when you know it's gone TOO FAR lmao but anyway, love your personality and video style! tysm

Carolyn, you be preaching!

This is such a helpful concept! I’m definitely going to try it.

Excellent personal style breakdown! 💌

I love your videos! This was great, style is so reflective and expressive

This is simply genius!

YES…YES…YES..period ❣️

Everything you pointed out had a soft landing for SUREEEEEEEE ❤.

I’m absolutely going to do this! Thanks for the inspiration, Carolyn.

I got it I am trying to stay focus on my style and not get caught up in what’s not for me.

This conversation definitely is helpful. Insightful.

SUCH a breath of fresh air you are! Thank you 👏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾✨

I enjoyed this video. I have so many versions of myself when it comes to clothing. For work its minimal effort very neutral and simple cuts. When going out I'm in some form of maxi dress. Errands its jeans a t-shirt/tank top and sometimes I'm androgenous The only thing that is consistent is that i love sneakers and I would find a way to wear them as often as possible. I always enjoy your content Carolyn

Hey Cookie, I enjoyed this video ❤! I have a few versions of myself now after listening to your thorough breakdown.

I’m pretty sure that the first comment I ever made on your page was that you reminded me of Felicia rashad!

I’m excited to catch you before you blow up with your YT content!!! Thank you for sharing your fashion takes with us fellow cookies ❤

Janelles vest is lovely

Yes, this came across correct for me!!! I love this because people really need to know their style‼️ thanks for sharing 😍👌🏾👏🏾

Outstanding you brought that with excellent style and meaning to elevation 👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾👌🏾

I ENJOYED THE ENTIRE CONCEPT FOR THIS VIDEO. LOVED YOUR SPIN ON IT!

This makes perfect sense and will be very in helping me redefine my style. Thanks for sharing 💜🦋

I feel like something finally clicked in my head! This video is sooo needed!!! I definitely needed that Style personality break down, it was very helpful. Thank you so much! Also, love your personality lol subscribing nooooww !

Love this vid what a thoughtful provoking vid thanks for sharing love it 😍😍😍😍🔥🔥🔥🔥❤️❤️❤️💯💯💯💯👍🏿👍🏿👍🏿👍🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿

Makes soo much freakin sense as to why sometimes knowing the trends does not help with getting dressed when clearly many of us have multiple characters as you say. Acknowledging all the characters and when they are going out and how they want to be received makes sooooo much sense. Currently struggling with identifying the lewks for a new version of myself that has to mingle in a new crowd….this helps a lot. Thanks ❤❤

Like you I'm over all these trends. There's so many who can keep up? Good video ❤️

I love your Take on Defining Personal Style through Personas/Personalities/Characters! I have always felt like I embodied different alter-egos when styling myself. I tend to tow the line between Maximalist & Minimalist styling, and depending on the character, I may mix two different ones to create a “fusion character”. My characters are: 1.“Mike Lowry”(sexy, silky, world traveler, Miami papi) 2.“Skateboard P” (alternative, grungy, skater, funky streetwear) 3.“Dapper Spiff” (loafers, preppy, art collector, magazine editor, cardigans, & broaches) 4.”The Divine Shaman” (Mixed ethnic prints, long robes, African accessories, wooden beads, vibrant color/earthtones) Thank You for the Inspo Carolyn 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪

Absolutely love this approach. I have struggled with the 3-words due to many different 'environments' that can cause different style expressions. ❤❤❤

It's interesting that you said Clare because you could have definitely played Dainese ❤

Love this video!! ❤🥰I definitely have my different style personalities that I love to tap into!! It really makes fashion fun!!😃 Thank you again for always giving us ways to think about our personal style!! 🥰❤️

I love the insight!! It is so freeing to see this, that I can have certain aspects based on my mood and who I need to be that day😊😊😊

This info is so great and such a wonderful guide to identify my style in various roles. Thanks for this. You are a true fashion guru. ✨🤩✨

This message is very helpful and inspiring. I’m going to do this as an exercise over the next week to list my style personalities.

I absolutely adore Claire Huxtable, her style is fabulous!!!

omg I'm really BIANCA!!! and this def my style lol 💜

I loooooove this take on finding a personal style! I'm going to take some time to think about this AND it can make you more intentional when shopping. I can ask myself which me am I shopping for today?!🎉😂

This is another great video. Really appreciated as I totally feel what you are saying here. I dress differently depending on what is going on in my life. It has been hard for me to dial my style down to a few simple words (have been trying to curate my capsule wardrobe for the last 9 months!) cause as you pointed out it all depends on what I’m doing or where I am going so this clarified why I have been having this difficulty and why I have gone on different style tangents as opposed to sticking to my 3 style pillars. I feel so relieved cause I will gravitate toward a thing or two that did not fit that structure. So thank you so much for that. On another note…I have been trying very hard to quit fast fashion (bad for the planet etc…wasteful)…..no SHein, Temu, H&M, Mango, Zara, or Urban Revivo…yikes it ain’t easy. Any chance you want to tackle this as a future subject. My new rule with fast fashion is it has to be at least 75% natural fibers as that is also my rule for any ready to wear. Your thoughts….btw I was surprised by how much synthetic fabric these fashion houses use. Not sure about you but I ain’t paying thousand of dollars for polyester. Again appreciate you woman!

Fashion Cookie over here...Great Information Carolyn! 🥰Those bracelets are amazing, can you put a link in the bio to share where you purchased them?

this is exactly what i was looking for. an evolution on the allison bornstein theory--which is great, but elementary. this is for the advanced people. style 102 ;)

Hi Carolyn.. I wonder if you have any Vivian Westwood pieces as she does structured and drapery all be it repetitive some pieces are just workable, for many events and situations… Anyhoo I have a array of styles, as I mix clothing I bought in the 90´s with 2023 pieces, it always tickles me when I plan not to shop but see a unusual structured garment or a soft cosy piece I don’t have anything like and then have purchase, I am great at recycling ♻️ my purchases , I use to sell soo much today I don’t like the hassle, but may do so again as have pieces I no longer wish to wear.. love loved this video. As I do your style and uniqueness ❤

Omg! Claire Huxtable was my dream mother. When I became a mother, I decided that I wanted to be a Claire Huxtable kinda mother…without being a lawyer. Lol

I am in the process of updating my personal style. I just completed my Ph.D, I am starting a new job, outside of academia and I am trying to decide how I want to show up in this new season because right now, I am all over the place lol

AWWWWWWW CARLOS!!!😂😊❤

I always say to myself that you look like Phylicia Rashad with a hint of Tamala Jones lol