Behold: kzfaq.info/love/9MwJyySI7a8wrAUDCyfqRA

@@magnusmoron thanks!

Definitely check out Dr Peter Malinowski, another faithful Catholic clinical psychologist with a very informative podcast, quite similar in style to Dr. B.

@@magnusmoron behold!!! 😂😂😂

A disorganized / fearful-avoidant attachment: develops when the child’s caregivers - the only source of safety - also become a source of fear. People with this attachment style are inconsistent in their behaviour and have a hard time trusting others. "The disorganized attachment style is believed to be a consequence of childhood trauma or abuse. Perceived fear is the central aspect of its development. The survival of the infant/child depends on the caregivers. The child knows that subconsciously, so he or she seeks safety in the caregivers. A problem arises when the source of safety becomes a source of fear. If the caregivers show highly contrasting behavior, which is inconsistent and unpredictable, the child can start fearing his or her own safety. The child does not know what to expect. Nor does the child know when the caregiver will meet their needs, if at all. Another reason for fear is having or witnessing a traumatizing experience that involves the attachment figure. (...) "Adults with a disorganized attachment style lack a coherent approach towards relationships. On the one hand, they want to belong. They want to love and be loved. While on the other hand, they are afraid to let anyone in. They have a strong fear that the people who are closest to them will hurt them. Adults with a disorganized attachment style fear intimacy and avoid proximity, similar to individuals with an avoidant attachment style. The main difference for disorganized adults is that they want relationships. These adults expect and are waiting for the rejection, disappointment, and hurt to come. In their perception, it is inevitable. They do not reject emotional intimacy; they are simply afraid of it. Adults with a disorganized attachment style continue to view the attachment figure (once, their caregiver, and now, their partner) as unpredictable. They have trouble believing that their partner will love and support them as they are. These adults expect and are waiting for the rejection, disappointment, and hurt to come. In their perception, it is inevitable. This mindset can turn into a form of self-sabotage, causing the disorganized adult to end a relationship prematurely. It might also be a type of self-fulfilling prophecy. So, the disorganized adult expects and predicts that they will be rejected by their partner. Even when there are no such signs, he or she starts behaving in a way that leads to fulfilling the expectations (the end of the relationship). It is also a self-fulfilling prophecy when an individual with a disorganized attachment style chooses partners that induce fear. Thus confirming their perception that they can’t trust other people (emotionally or physically), no matter what." From the Attachment project: Disorganized Attachment: Causes & Symptoms

Great summary!

Thank you posting the notes

I went through the same thing when I started understanding that so many of my wounds came from my parents. Anxious attachment here 🙋🏻‍♀️ I resented them for a few years, but as I grew in my relationship with God (knowing that he wasn’t disappointed, dismissive, or demanding as I thought he was growing up) I began to realize that I both acknowledge they hurt me AND live in forgiveness. Having my own kid changed my relationship with them as well. I now can see that while they hurt me, they did their best, and I can turn to God with the trust that he’ll supply what is lacking.

Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel S. F. Heller

I suggest you address some of these dogmatic or scriptural problems with Dr. David Anders. I think he can help you resolve what you believe to be dogmatic based on the readings of the Old Testament. He is on at 2 pm central time. The show is Called to Communion, here on KZfaq. Good luck

@@fernandocavuto1449 When I say dogmas I am just referring to the basic Christian doctrines, that is the Credo. My leaving the Church was much more about the basic doctrines/dogmas than about the Old Testament , as the O.T. was never central for me as a believer. (Edit: I saw the O T as a history of the beliefs and religious developement of fallible men, and not as an infallible text giving a true description of God, but it was still problematic that it was seen as "spiritual food" and often described as true stories meant to give inspiration to the believers, though I know the Catholic Church doesn't take everything as literal as many Evangelicals do) But since you mention it, if you do see the Old Testament as a true story about God and his people, and if you see all the prophecies and rules in the Old Testament as God's actual will at the time for the Old Pact (and not as primarily man made), I don't think that is possible without a lot of cognitive dissonace. Like 1. Samuel 15:2-3 "This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. 3 Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy all that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.’” And this is just one of the places in the OT where God is ordering the killing of babies.

Check out Jeff Cavins' Bible Timeline resources to knit it all together.

@@mailill --So what are you now, if I may ask?