Topics we discuss in this video: Why your past is influencing you way more than you think. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="114">1:54</a>​] Why you struggle to change bad habits, and what is holding you back from change. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="137">2:17</a>​] Why your brain wants you to stay the way you´re today. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="280">4:40</a>​] The real reason why it´s hard to break patterns. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="329">5:29</a>​] The most effective practice to break your bad habits. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="371">6:11</a>​] Why most of us are staying in the past or worrying about our future and what to do instead. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="426">7:06</a>​] How to practice staying in the moment. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="497">8:17</a>​] The two ways on how to practice being present, even if meditation overwhelms you. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="542">9:02</a>​] The reason why sitting in silence makes you uncomfortable. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="600">10:00</a>​] How meditation, when you feel unsafe, can lead to another trauma. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="741">12:21</a>​] How Nicole discovered the real reason why her brain felt foggy. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="878">14:38</a>​] The easiest method everyone can use everywhere to start to heal from childhood trauma. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1060">17:40</a>​] How to start learning to breathe to beat anxiety in your day-to-day life. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1130">18:50</a>​] How you can change your life with little promises to yourself. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1223">20:23</a>​] How to use feeling uncomfortable with a new habit to maintain it forever. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1348">22:28</a>​] The importance of reframing to change your behavior. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1376">22:56</a>​] Why you don´t have to give up your anger and how to make space for new feelings. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1510">25:10</a>​] How to decide if a feeling or habit is valuable. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1584">26:24</a>​] How to get radically honest with yourself. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1670">27:50</a>​] The makers Nicole watches out for in her nervous system to know if she´s safe or not. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1889">31:29</a>​] How you repeat your childhood patterns in your current relationships. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1986">33:06</a>​] Why your genes and personality are not your destiny and how to create your future self. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2140">35:40</a>​] How to use “future self journaling” to counter your subconscious autopilot and create change. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2250">37:30</a>​] Why you can use “future self journaling” for changing every aspect of your life. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2457">40:57</a>​] The fundamental reason why most people can´t access creativity, joy, or love. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2559">42:39</a>​] Why, without sleep, diet, and exercise, mental strategies only go so far. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2700">45:00</a>​] How to deal with your shortcomings and when life is unfair. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="2965">49:25</a>​] How repetition shaped your limiting beliefs and how to create new empowering beliefs. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="3137">52:17</a>​] How to rebuild your self-worth when you didn´t keep your promises in the past. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="3330">55:30</a>​] How to use your “re-parenting” to heal your inner child. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="3480">58:00</a>​] Nicole shares how to connect with her. [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="61">1:01</a>:33​] QUOTES: “Feelings that you feel become easier to feel.” [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="296">4:56</a>​] “The way out first and foremost: We want to become conscious. We want to see those patterns.” [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="371">6:11</a>​] “Thoughts thought long enough lead to a feeling.” [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="613">10:13</a>​] “What I learned is each time I do one of those things: Either breathe very shallowly, or I am holding my breath, I am contributing to my anxiety, keeping my nervous system locked in that fight or flight mode. So I had to find a new way to breathe.” [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1092">18:12</a>​] “I urge everyone out there to create change for themselves and you do it, by practicing a new thought, by overtime allowing in a little more confirming evidence of that new thought, and before you know it you do start to see more and more evidence and now you lived the experience of changing a belief.” [<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="3312">55:12</a>​]

5 weeks ago i started a 5 am morning routine that has improved my life dramatically. 1. Meditation 2. Mindfulness 3. Breathing exercises 4. Workout 5. Check work emails 6. Work on building a fitness business By <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="450">7:30</a> my day has been completed so bring on the non sense because my mind is ready for it. I take control of my day before it takes control of me👍👍

Dude we can't tell how much we are learning by your podcast I respect from the core and bottom of my heart please keep the good work ahead

If anyone reading this has experienced trauma in their life then Dr Nicola’s book, “How to do the work” is truly transformational. Painful too, but worth every tear. Thank you, Tom for always showing up.

I am not where I want to be , but I am proud I am not where I used to be ..

I love the way she says « a lot of us » when describing a behaviour instead of « a lot of people ». We can definitely tell that she is a compassionate person.

Nicole is a precise match to everything I went through, except it took me decades of ignorance, clawing my way out, of trying and trying to figure myself out. I got deep into the what is what and at one point I almost gave up thinking this is the way it ends for me, but I didn't give up. I understand everything she's talking about, except, I only have a high school education. Not only was I suffering from depression, ADHD and anxiety, and low self esteen all at once, I also lacked in education because of those conditions. I learned these ideas in darkness and suffering of being me, crawling a few inches every other 3 days and finally after more than 25 years of slow progress I eventually gained momentum. Nicole is the first person to clearly explain everything that I have concluded about being present and the power of self-awareness. I've developed an actual reality model that I prescribed for myself in order to remain oriented. I have a rule about thinking or deep thinking to remain in flow in the moment, don't go too far in and don't go too far out of both your inner and outer realities. There's so much more I discovered about consciousness and I would have never figured it out without John Huberman's work and his generosity sharing his depth of understanding of our nervous systems.

I agree and teach others that 95% of our day we are operating from our subconscious, habitual mind. Once we understand our past conditioning, and that our emotions are always guiding us; we can begin to incorporate more self love into our lives, and this can be heaven on earth. Our past does not define us, but we can embrace it, and focus upon the desires created as a result of any contrast we experienced.

”Boundaries are a form of self-empowerment.” That’s huge! Thank you!!! 🙏🏾💗🌸

The issues she speaks about - the forgetting, the brain fog, etc., sound an awful lot like my own experience. I came from a violent, abusive background as well. My response was to check out - leave my body. That's why I don't have very many childhood memories - I disassociated instead of dealing with overwhelming pain. She also talks about how some of us can retraumatize ourselves by Rambo-diving into conscious awareness practice too quickly, driving us into overwhelm. This serves to reinforce our existing shame and self-loathing. I really love what this woman is saying. To those here who compare her with this doctor or that philosopher, or say that she's just parroting someone else's work: I would ask that you give those opinions more thought. We need more voices like her. She is espousing information that we all need to hear. She's using her voice, her words, and her background to communicate this information. In this way she is unique, and it's unfair to take that away from her. There are many who may not have heard of these other doctors, or relate to the way these other people present these ideas. Let her be. She's doing wonderful and badly needed work, and I applaud her. for those looking for more information about this, another astounding mind in this field is Gabor Mate. He's put out many videos on the impact of childhood trauma, and how important it is to process that trauma in order to heal.

Absolutely THRILLED to see this powerhouse of a woman on more platforms!!! Dr. Nicole’s work is life-changing - she is truly a pioneer in the field of re-parenting and trauma. This is pre-watching the segment too, can’t wait to see it now. Thank you for helping spread such immensely important information about mental health.

Nicole LePera teaches from a place of authenticity, as she lives what she teaches. Her awareness and inclusion of the whole person, mind, body and the deep self, practical, logical and spiritual, and so much more.

Nicole is the real deal. I have followed her for a long time on IG, and now YT. I am one who has had lots of trauma as a child and overcoming that, took changing my mind. I was quite disconnected for a long time and she helped me recognize all the patterns I had that I was unaware of. The unsafe feelings that were actually holding me back. I'm very grateful for her and for Tom for having her on.

A key way of altering the subconscious is through strong emotions. Every morning I get up and listen to a song that brings tears to my eyes. I jump, pump, and engage my tears asking and feeling as if my requests are already here. I’ve been witnessing how my specific requests are coming to fruition. The other way is forced repetition. Asking myself great questions and thinking hard, imagining, dreaming had helped me as well.

"It begins in small daily things. Many of us are confirming a narrative of unworthiness because we're not showing up for ourselves in the smallest of ways". - Dr. Nicole LePera So powerful and true.

I used to think of my dad passing from alcoholism as a negative. Took 20 years to reframe it and see it as a positive. My dad passing from alcohol abuse was a gift because it made me aware of my own problems with alcohol. Will be 2 years sober in March!

Your emotions send the signals to the brain that programs the body and fuels the chemical mix that creates the state of being you are operating from. That state of being is your personality or in other words: your unconscious reactions, attitudes, actions, behaviour which represents 95% of who you are. Emotions are a result of past events and feelings that arouse in those events. Do a meditation, lower your brainwaves and you gain access to the subconscious programming or these past events that might be holding you back. Now you can resolve them and change the emotion that is fueling your behaviour and actions. For example if you have an addiction to an external substance such as alcohol, (could be anything, food, tv, etc) Solving the internal emotion that is fueling that behaviour could lead you to completely stop drinking alcohol instead of constantly self sabotaging your attempts because you think alcohol is the problem when in reality, it's jsut a reflection of your inner world. Ok this is getting long, hope it helps!

This is awesome. She speaks my language. It took me a lifetime of healing to discover so many of these things and now I teach it to kids. I am getting her book today. I wish I had a therapist like her 20 years ago. ❤️🙏

Life is a practice. We become what we consistently do. Journaling, talking things out with others, asking self good questions can help get to the underlying issues under the surface thoughts. Insightful talk, she is aware and wise.

This is such a powerful episode. After my mom passed away from cancer back in 2013, I began to develop high anxiety and stress about my future. I began diving into holistic practices like journaling, meditation, exercising, subconscious reprogramming, etc. and its absolutely changed my life! I share my tips on my blog and social media if you are interested! Please make the decision to heal, it’ll be the best decision of your life! 🙏💙

Love the way Nicole speaks. So clear. Every word is uttered so clearly. Great !

This is so spot on: become your own healer. Thank you for this interview Tom and Nicole!

Nicole is awesome! I gasped when I saw this was posted! Just can’t get enough of her videos because they have helped me so much. 🙏🏾Thanks Tom and Nicole!!

"Instruction manual should be written by people who have struggled to achieve it."Tom Bilyeu

“The subconscious is what a man is. The conscious is what a man knows.” ~ Neville Goddard

I really like her energy it’s compassionate and thorough 😍

Mad respect for tom who is asking all the right questions 👏

Always a fan of reprogramming the subconscious, it literally shapes one's reality.

We have to acknowledge and parent our inner child! We all have one. You wouldn't leave a child unsupervised and unguided in life normally, so don't do it with your inner child.

13 minutes in and think this is one of the best vids you've done Tom. Very info rich. Very clear and concise. Brilliant!

World needs genuine people like you guys. Love you both. Thank you.

I’m starting to realize it’s absolutely insane how accessible life changing information is. And just how MUCH of it there is.

I am so grateful for show notes and time stamps. Thank you.

“Tuning in to a conscience moment.” That’s a brilliant way of putting it. This video is timely for me. I had such a rough morning but this has uplifted my spirit oh so much! 🙏🏾 Thank you!

yea. not even a minute into the video and i hit THUMBS UP, KNOWING this is a goodie!!!!!!!! now, i will actually watch the video!

I have spent the entire day watching Nicole Lepera interviews. Thank you, found my twin.

I teach meditation and stress reduction methods for wellness and what she mentions at <a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="702">11:42</a> is really common, some folks are too agitated to sit to meditate. They need to work up to it, and can start with just paying attention to say washing dishes or some other daily activity to ground them.

I love love love this interview ❤ I also think it's great that Nicole is able to explain a little bit about the fact that people can create themselves. This is a GREAT start!!

Thank you Tom and Impact Theory for the creating impact on my life. I’m learning every single day and I’m always excited for tomorrow 🙂

Thank you so much for this video, it is amazingly helpful 🤯🤯

I truly love your videos. I feel like you are an extremely talented interviewer! Thanks for these videos 😄

This spoke directly to my heart. I have so many tools. I’ve done so much work on my anxiety. I find her ideas very helping and healing.

Just want to shout to the world how amazing Tom’s podcasts are! 100% great content every show

This show has been paramount to my healing! I love the way your mind works - thank you for introducing so many great sources of knowledge into my life!

Hearing that two inspiring people have struggled with crippling anxiety gives me more hope than you can possibly imagine. Thank you both for being so open about your stories and best practices

It always interests to listen to Nicole"s Message. Deeply Engaging. Thanks Tom for Presenting the Talk.

She is awesome. I have experienced so many things she talks about. I specifically love her perspective on being safe in the body.

“You have to be willing to see things that are impossible and TRY.”

I inevitably cry my way through these conversations with Nicole, and I also emerge renewed. Thank you both. 🙏

every word Nicole is saying is like so much alike how I been feeling, it felt so good to listen to her and get some answers.thank you Nicole.

LOVE! LOVE! LOVE! This woman! 💕 incredible interview! Dropping so many wisdom bombs 💣

Best vid I've seen in a while by you Tom, great work.

So much wisdom in this podcast! Thank you so much for making and sharing this.

Loved listening to this interview. Thank you for this. 🤗🤗

This video made me reflect so much, it was truly helpful. I feel empowered to develop my conscious mind; to turn it into the wise parent that my inner child needs to transform into a spring of positive emotions and maturity. Thank you Tom for providing content that helps us become the best version of ourselves. Much love from Mexico

Tom is one of the greatest listeners I have seen

Thank you for your guidance. It's helped a ton. You guys mean the world to me

Wow Tom you are way more expressive, animated, excited and happier? Looking in this video versus the more current ones. It’s like you’re a different person. Now you seem way more reserved, almost a flat affect, more Vulcan-like., rarely smiling. In any event, I love your channel, and there have been many good interviews, and I appreciate your efforts to learn and grow yourself and others

This woman is amazing!!

So full of practical useable info...another home run tom and team!

Wherever I see it is with Nicole Lepera, I know it’s gonna be worth the time. ¡Amazing!

I love her!! So humble, caring, generous, smart, in other words BADASS...innovative woman!!! ♥️♥️♥️

Thank you so much. This is so filled with useful tools, I took a lot of notes. Thanks again. Worth fully watching.

powerful. thank you tom, for another amazing episode.

Thank you so much you guys ❤️ it's so much empowering to do the work!

Thank you very much for this information. I remember Journaling various experiences and attempting to heal from childhood trauma. I would attend church and read the Bible yet the real change came in my life once I began meditation and healing my subconscious.

When my mind wanders, i watch your videos. After a dew days of not feeling like myself, theres always a vid that helps me get my mind right once again

This is such awesome information. It reinforces a lot of the things I've heard and I'm so happy to be on the right track to changing my life and becoming the best version of myself that I'm meant to be. I am super anxious to pay it forward

GREAT interview. Loved it all, but the kids convo was fascinating...so so so good.

Wow! I love this. I have been followibg Nicole for a while, going to buy her book. I was just randomly looking for an interview with her. I must say, I am so impressed. Bravo on all the great questions!!! I learned so much

needed this now great timing ❤❤❤

I absolutely love how u interview.. you really ask the things I’m thinking n fast thank you so much for ur work

Thank you for bringing so much light

You always have intriguing interviews.

Thnx Tom.The info is such practical. Will b here to tell of my difference after 3 months

Absolutely loved this video. Thank you so much for this valuable information Nicole. Lots of love from an Australian 🇦🇺😀

Super basic, super fundamental, so well explained!

Fully agree with her! Stepping out of your comfort zone is the way we grow, there is no shortcut! Thank you for this useful conversation🧡

Awesome! Looking forward to watching this soon! 💯

SO EXCITED FOR THIS COLLAB!

I honor her personal struggles, admire her ability to use them in a positive way that has transformed her into a wiser, happier and productive human and appreciate her work in sharing her experience for the betterment of others. If all used stressful and seemingly unfortunate situations as tools to learn and evolve (instead of feel like a victim and blame others), Earth would be heaven.

"Instruction manuals should be written by people who struggled to build the item" reminds of Jung saying "The Doctor is effective only when he himself is affected". Thanks for sharing wisdom dear Tom and Nicole! :)

This woman is legendary and tom doing this show and asking these questions and putting time and effort on this is makes you more legendary, life changing show, life changing man you are❤️

I relate to nicole in so many areas, thank you for this awesome interview!

This interview reminds me of simger 'Jewel'. She was the first person I heard telling how to make anxiety your friend, how to use the physical and mental cues to resolve issues.

Thank you ! What a gift to share. A wealth of solutions to my squirrel cage mind. Truly grateful!

I'm hooked. lol. Not even half way through this interview and I've already searched and subscribed to her channel! Can't wait to head over to your wife's channel and watch those interviews with Nicole Lepara as well. Great interview! You always rock Tom Bilyeu!

You both are amazing🙌 Im Thankful to have come across this I have been self learned all my life stop going school in the 6th grade. Got pregnant at 13 and everything you have said I been doing the work and still healing. I have named my conscious/subconscious make easier to talk about them😉 Walking in my purpose #2023 🙌🙌🙌

Thank you for all your awesome videos! The content is top notch.

Amazing!. I am reading her book. I have been doing FSJ for three days. I am witnessing improvements in my life. Indeed! the book was an eye-opener

Love this interview. Learning so much. ♥️

Great talk! When you go to therapy you address all of these issues AND see changes that are long lasting. It’s important to find someone who is holistic but most of these concepts are the underpinnings of psychodynamic psychotherapy like resistance, re-parenting, reframing etc.

I love this woman! I apreciate it... you set me free. My personal identity is back!Thank you!

This was really helpful, thank you!

Aahhh!! I seriously connected with this information! I have been aware that, becoming aware, is where recognition of myself begins. That becoming aware of how I deal with feelings and thoughts is how I needed to begin, to change my behaviors. But I could never get past that point. I couldn't figure out what to do with my realizations. How to work on them. Perfect directions! I'm getting the book!

Nicole is great! Can't wait to read her book!

Thank you so much for all of you! I have suffering with social anxiety for 23 yeara. but now I'm going to be a smart person!

Loved it. Fascinating stuff. Thanks

<a href="#" class="seekto" data-time="1440">24:00</a> -- Talking about "caregivers". My mother and father divorced when I was about 5. My mother remarried the man who she would stay with for the next 40 years when I was about 7. Things were great with him until I hit puberty. He became (or maybe was always) very petulant and any sort of pushback from me was met with irrational pouting and anger. Once I turned 17, I joined the Marines and left home. They wouldn't even come to my Bootcamp graduation, a once-in-a-lifetime event. It took me 20 years to deal with that, what I can only describe as betrayal. What I realized, in my late 30s was that he did the best he could do. He was self-centered, self-serving, and petulant, yes, but it wasn't his fault that he was incapable of change. I had to recognize that and make the decision of whether I was willing to let the past go and embrace my family or hold onto that anger and frustration that had NO constructive value in my life. So, I moved back up to Oregon and buried the hatchet. A few years later, he divorced my mother after having an affair. Something that, as much as I didn't really like the little man, never thought in a million years he'd do. He was very old-school, refusing to let my mother work for the entire time they were married. They married in 1968, so that was pretty common back then. It was before Reagan destroyed our economy and forced women to join the workforce just to maintain a decent standard of living. But I digress. (That's one point of anger that I will probably never get over.) Anyway, he refused to provide any alimony or support for my mother in any way. Ultimately, the courts ended up giving my mother more than she would have settled for without going to court. Did I mention he wasn't very bright? I never spoke to him after that. Not because I was angry with him, but because I literally had no room for him in my life. What little respect I retained for him had been wiped out and I saw no reason to continue to bother to try to hold onto a relationship with this person who I never really accepted as my father. He was just "the guy in charge" while I was growing up. He died probably 10 years ago now and I still don't regret not having worked to retain a relationship with him. Hell, I hadn't even thought about him in at least 5 years, until this sparked that memory. My REAL father, now that's another story, but suffice it to say that I DID bury the hatchet with him and was part of his life for the last couple of years. And I believe I _would_ have regretted not letting go of the betrayal that his wife had thrown my way. But that is another story...

Finding this interview a year late but WOW great information and a different perspective on our subconscious and how to reprogram.