Fun fact about that fight scene; Summer and the cameraman who shot that scene are both dancers. So they basically choreographed a "dance" between the two of them, moving amongst the stunt team who she was fighting with, and that's how they achieved that shot. It's such a creative way to film a fight scene and that's why I think it is one of the coolest looking fights in cinema history.

Firefly fans? Take my like. Take my subscription. Take my undying respect and devotion.

"...accuse them of being weak or selfish, and I will explode." As a suicide survivor, I can't praise you enough for this mentality.

Summer made it all look so graceful cause she was a professionally trained ballerina. Amazing talented woman.

When ya can't afford therapy, THIS is pretty good.

Simon's love for River is so pure. He holds to his ideals even when abandoned and betrayed by the man who raised him. I just realized Simon is effectively the Galahad to Mal's damaged Arthur.

Firefly was The Mandalorian before there was The Mandalorian.

I always got the feeling that Miranda was so bright was to show how the Alliance tried to create a pure, sterile world and also that it was almost a metaphor of how the truth can sometimes be hard to look at

When I was suicidal, I would daily ask myself if I wanted to die (I don't care) and what did I have to live for (I don't know). One day, out of the blue, I woke up and asked "Do I want to die" and answered, surprised at the time, "I don't know." I asked "what do I have to live for?" And I answered "I want to see Airk and April grow up so if they ever feel this way, I can help them through it." My niece and nephew in this case, but yes, I found what I had to live for. It stunned me and I have never forgotten that those kids kept me alive, literally. I even told them when they were older about that. To this day, they are alive and appear to be thriving. I don't live in the same state as either of them, but they both came to Mom's house at a time when they needed help, and I was able to talk with them and get to know them better. Also, something I hadn't foreseen: I was able to help two online friends by recognizing (in private chats) that they were that low. And I was bale to help my little sister, who actually told me that she wanted to drive into a telephone pole but didn't want to leave her husband and kids without a means of support. I told her to talk to her husband, but she insisted she didn't want him to know she was suicidal. I told her that he would already know it. I heard a couple weeks alter that he finally broke down and told her he thought she was suicidal. She was stunned he had noticed. Apparently that opened the gates and they talked and she began to heal: finding out that her husband could see her pain and wanted to help. My advice? If you see someone struggle, reach out to them! Don't wait for them to reach out. They may never do it. Many times they want someone to notice and tell them they are worth noticing. Not for "attention", but for actual self worth.

The increased light and blowout feeling of Miranda colony always made me think of the over sterilized white washing concept. As they get closer to this dirty secret things get overly sterilized and hidden by the "light" of the alliance.

''if you love someone that took their own life, it doesn't mean you weren't important enough. It's to say the illness overtook them. And generally speaking they fought as long as they could.'' Jonathan, thank you for these words. You have no idea how much they mean to me. I occasionally return to this video to listen to you say this. I think this must be my favorite quote from this channel.

Unfortunately, I can relate all too well to River's PTSD and her symptoms. It can be very real as if you are living it at that moment and your present self ceases to exist or be a part of your conscience. It's paralyzing, you can't run, you can't scream, you can't move and then everything just rushes you all at once like a freight train.

I need therapy after watching Firefly for the first time and realizing it was canceled after one season 😭

River doesn't demonstrate avoidance because she can't. Firefly revealed that the Alliance had manipulated her brain so that she was unable to block out pain or fear or memory.

I came to Firefly via Serenity. Cancelling Firefly was one of the biggest mistakes Fox ever made.

When you mentioned the one element of PTSD she doesn't display it reminded me of this scene from Firefly: Simon : [horrified] They did it over... and over. They stripped her amygdala. Jayne : Her what? Simon : You know uh, you know how you get... scared, or, or worried or nervous when you don't want to be scared or worried or nervous; you push it to the back of your mind, you try not to think about it. Your amygdala is what lets you do that, it's like a, a filter in your brain that keeps your feelings in check... She feels *everything*, she can't not.

I also feel like her "I'm all right" is the climax of chasing this hidden truth and the pain waiting there, and now she's THERE and she's faced the Big Dark Secret and it doesn't break her or destroy her - she's still here. Still standing. Perhaps even standing a bit taller. She didn't know what it would do to her. But she's all right. For a River-scale level of "right", at least. ;)

Sometimes, the illness convinces you that no one will be sad. Not even for a few weeks. You are the first person who admitted to not having those thoughts and being angry when a suicidal person is called weak. And I know I've said it myself a million times but I never thought that I needed someone who didn't understand to say that. Thank you so much.

I used to identify with this character a lot. I am a survivor of severe childhood neglect and abuse. My father was violent and sexuality abusive and my mother has Munchausen By Proxy personality disorder and psychopathic traits. When she didn't want to play with me or use me to get attention and admiration from others, she could be violent, sadistic or indifferent to my needs and suffering. I have Disassociative Identity Disorder and complex PTSD. I have also survived a lot of domestic violence. I used to wish that someone would come along, love me protect me and take care of me. I was conditioned to believe that I could never take care of myself, that I was lucky that I had my family loved me, because I was such a burden. I wasn't allowed to display signs of physical or emotional distress. I wasn't allowed to be angry with my father no matter what he did to me, so I turned on myself. I tried to kill myself so many times. I'd always heard family members say that suicide was such a selfish act, but I just wanted the pain to stop and I thought that was the only way out. My parent's behavior didn't change. I called my father from the psychiatrist hospital after an attempt and he told me that it was my fault that my husband broke his knee, because he was riding his bike home from the hospital after I tried to kill myself. My husband was devoted and pampered me, but it was always on his terms. He told me that it was his right as my husband to see me in form fitting feminine clothing, even after I told him that I hated wearing the kind of clothing that he wanted to see me in. He got angry at me when I ate at my parent's house, because it made him look like a bad provider. I wasn't allowed to borrow money from anyone for the same reason. He had spent time in prison for armed robbery and told me that if a police officer pulled him over, that he was going to make a run for it and shoot it out even if it ended in his death, because he never wanted to go back to prison. He said that he would do this, even if I was in the seat next to him. He always kept a huge gun under the seat of his car and next to his bed. If there was any noise outside of the trailer, he would leap outside firing his gun at what ever made the noise. He was obsessed with the idea of us dying together. I was afraid for my life for 8 years. The last time he left me alone in my apartment, I packed my bags and went to a domestic violence shelter. I was terrified that he would come home early and shoot me or find some way to prevent me from ever leaving him. It was safer for me to leave town, so I transferred to a domestic violence shelter outside of the area. During my stay there, I realized that what my parents taught me about myself was wrong. I was capable, competent, strong, resourceful and able to survive without them. I won't ever give up my independence for anyone ever again. I am in therapy and finally able to be honest with mental health professionals and what has happened to me. My childhood was horrifying and my father told me that I wasn't allowed to talk about it, even though I told him that I would end up killing myself if I couldn't talk about it with anyone. He said that if I did that I would destroy my family. For the first time in my life, I am putting mental health before the my father's freedom and public image. I feel like I am healing. No one should have told me not to talk about my trauma.

i accidentally skipped back during the intro so i skipped forwards again and the missed audio was timed perfectly so it just said "welcome to therapy" without even an audio stutter and i'm just like thank you good sirs

"Accuse them of being weak or selfish, and I will explode." That made me cry. As a suicide survivor who had a friend abandon me because of my attempt, I can't thank you enough for this. Thank you for being so understanding.

I love that throughout he used language like “their brain convinced them” “their mental illness is telling them” which I think is language we need to use more often. That’s what it’s like for me with depression. There’s the voice inside your head, like an instinctive emotional response that you then have to fight against. It’s almost like I can literally have 2 dialogues going in mind, my mental illness vs my conscious rational thought.

I know this whole video is about coping with River's trauma - but one of my favorite exchanges is in the penultimate scene, between Zoe and Mal: Mal: Think she'll hold together? Zoe: She's tore up plenty, but she'll fly true. Such understated connection and unspoken support between fellow soldiers recognizing loss.

I think the brightening lights in the movie are even more symbolic than just discomfort. Brightness/sunlight are often associated with joy and calm -- with serenity, you might say -- and as we get closer to Miranda, things start getting brighter, as if to suggest we're almost at the point where they can find that serenity once they solve the mystery. But when they finally get there, the lights don't stop brightening; in fact, they get so bright that, as you said, they're uncomfortable and disconcerting. As if symbolizing that it was the peace and calm itself that became harmful -- which is exactly what the Pax drug was about.

"I aim to misbehave." Still my favorite line. But seriously. When she's fighting, River's dancing, and it's freaking amazing.

I know people are talking about the line "I'm alright" in the context of her being validated, and I think that's correct, but I also can't help but think that she also feels better because she just vomited. Like she's been carrying this feeling around in her stomach and finally got rid of it in a visceral way.

one line I'm surprised you didn't address that really sums up depression in my experience: "Wǒ xiǎng mèi ěr, mèixīn, biàn shítou (I want to darken my ears and heart and become a stone) Please, God, make me a stone."

I always thought Miranda was insufferably lit/bright/white because it was emphasizing that the motivation was to drive out human darkness - make humans less aggressive and more peaceful. That's usually a "good" thing, but even good things can be bad when you force it on people or take it too far, hence too much light on the planet where everyone became so peaceful they just laid down and died.

"When you face the things you're afraid of, they cease to have power over you." I love that!

I remember working at the local cinema when this movie first came out. Alan Tudyk is just amazing in everything he's in. He really is such an underrated character actor.

i guess this is a sign that i should rewatch firefly again... and then get mad that it got cancelled... again...

Firefly and, to a lesser extent, Serenity helped me deal with my own traumas. Seeing that Captain Reynolds could become a functional member of society and be loved by someone really helped me.

4:04 Summer Glau's acting in that scene was incredible.

Joss Whedon said that he designed the whole Serenity ship to fulfill his image of Summer up on the catwalk looking down at people talking about her and he designed the whole "Serenity" movie to justify the shot of River with the weapons when the door irises back open after the fight. He also says that Summer Glau was very good at suggesting how to use her ballet skills in combat.

Summer Glau even as a newer actor at the time did such an incredible job portraying such a complex character. Seriously oscar worthy!

I really loved this series and the movie. It was really sad when they cancelled the series.

After watching the whole series and movie nearly a dozen times, I never quite realized how much Summer (River) incorporates her real life profession of dance into her fight scenes until now. Her fighting is like a very brutal ballet

Note. Jayne was the one that says "turn it off"

I think at one point in the show they confirm that River feels everything, both from herself and those around her, all the time and she can’t turn it off.

That scene where River is fighting the Reevers. I cannot stop crying every single time I see it. It pulls so much emotion out of me, and reaches me so deeply. Her story of trauma and recovery has always touched me, and I see her in me.

I teared up because... Yes we want someone to understand in a moment like that but someone who can be gentle and pull us close when everyone else pushes or runs away? Ugh man. That's just as good. That means EVERYTHING.

I have Asperger syndrome and I can relate and sympathize with River Tam.

My youngest, if he had've been a girl at birth, was going to be named River. After both River Tam and River Song. Two of the most bada$$ and elegant women ever on screen.

How I wish I grew up with someone who showed the kind of empathy your speaking about. My grandpa was the only person but my family told me not to tell him anything(bad trauma) because it would kill him. Being an empathetic child I kept quiet. He died never knowing. I accept my childhood but it's really hard to accept the unfairness. That's my biggest struggle now is accepting the unfairness of life towards so many innocents.

Dear god, I ended up outright sobbing through a surprisingly large chunk of this episode. Been a long time fan of Firefly and Serenity, but never made the connection & parallels with my own depression & anxiety. I think you guys just became my new favourite youtube channel.

Finally, someone who is a therapist says it... "...if someone takes their life, and you accuse someone of being weak or selfish..." I cannot say how many times I've had this discussion with people... Super important.

Just found your channel and I am on a binging spree right now. This movie seems really interesting and I just want to thank you for making this review and introducing it to me.

Thank you so much. I wish I could hug you both. I’ve spent a lot of time in treatment for suicide prevention and PTSD, among other things. Trauma is hard to get over and many every day things can bring on an episode that leaves me completely undone. I gave a speech last year at an event and I remember saying “I was not weak. I was not overly sensitive. I was tired. Tired of waking up to fight the same demons I went to sleep with the night before. I was tired of being tired in a way sleep couldn’t fix.” People don’t realize the strength it takes to live with mental illness. The understanding simply isn’t there. Thank you for defending all of us who struggle every day. We are not weak. We are not selfish. But we are misunderstood. Love your channel. Thank you for bringing attention to matters society so often ignores.

This hits home. I lost my father to depression after he battled it for decades. He finally got to the point where he said he was done trying to fight it. My mother is an absolute warrior for helping him as much as she did. Every day was a battle, and she never stopped--even when he did.

having a friendship like this guys do is THE life goal❤️

"Who's flying this thing?" ... I absolutely loved Firefly when it was on TV so long ago, I still binge watch it now when I get the chance. "Objects in Space" is my favorite episode. Glad I found the channel. This video and the "Inside Out" video were great to watch. Your explanations are very relatable.

It's not just that River sees a way forward after everyone finds out what happened on Miranda, it's that she's not alone with the knowledge. It's lifted a giant burden off her soul/brain. Speaking from personal experience, sharing the facts around my trauma from childhood and early adulthood with others was a huge release. For years, I was forced to keep quiet by my parents out of (their) embarrassment and fear of judgment (they allowed a family member to abuse me, and let it continue, and when I was raped by a BF in early adulthood my mother called me a liar and warned me I better not tell anyone because I would look stupid and slutty). When I finally told friends and others in my family about the trauma, my parents got angry at me. Accusing me of attention seeking, even trying to gaslight me about it, blame me (I was 8-13, ffs. No. I wasn't "asking" for it. No matter the age, but especially not at those ages), saying I was a drama queen just looking for attention. No. It was because the horror and terror of it all was crushing my soul. I literally had chronic nausea, headaches, the worst nightmares you can imagine. It continued to fester for 30 years. It caused sexual function issues as an adult, to where I sought out (unconsciously) sexually abusive partners. And when I did somehow find a good partner (damn, was that lucky!), I couldn't relax and just BE. I'm 40 now and I'm JUST now dealing with the repressed memories, damage, anger, RAGE really, about having to 1.survive after being violated by family 2.Somehow feel livable and worthy of life after my parents sold me out to a sexual sadist for some reason (Honestly, probably drugs, since I found out recently that was why they were taking me to that damn house, over and over. Our cousin was their drug hook up) and 3. Told that it was my fault anyway and that if ANYONE found out, I'd have destroyed our family. That to keep the peace and not destroy "everything" I better keep my mouth shut about it. I had to hold that secret, that information (that my parents wouldn't protect me and didn't love me enough to even try), AND continue to be molested for YEARS. Just holding that crushed me. When I shared it with people who cared, it lifted the burden. I felt, suddenly, for the 1st time in 30 something years, like I could eat without almost vomiting. This movie moved me in a way it didn't for the friends I saw it with. I understand River in a way that was a little too deep. And at the time, I couldn't explain because of shame, confusion, and terror. Which, of course, just made it effect me more. It was a confusing spiral of emotions. I'm real mad at Joss Whedon the person, but Joss Whedon the writer/director is very talented. Get help, Joss lol

The light is like the icarus story. The closer we get to the sun, the more we get burned by its brilliance. And is perfection a good thing?

It's one of my favorite TV shows. My now-husband introduced it to me when we were dating early on in college, and it holds a special place in our hearts.

Unrelated: They just grew 200 subs in the past half hour. At this rate they'll have 100k in like 9 days.

My teacher in grade 8 introduced me to this show, and I can’t thank him enough for it. I was born in 2001, so I didn’t get to see it as it aired. But this show is something else

I always thought they blew out Miranda to make it sterile. Like there was no room for even the little darknesses and flaws of humanity.

I have not (yet perhaps) seen this film, but I can relate to the 'warrior' role of beating the *** of trauma as a childhood abuse survivor, through facing it head on and healing it everyday all day, all life long - empathy, faith, resilience and strength - the gaslighting and emotions analysis you did through Tangled and Inside Out works into this with secondary abuse whn family of origina don't believe you and all I can say is there are many who do not speak their truth but carry their cross daily but one day all truth will be known and all tears will be wiped away x

When he talked about repressed memories and knowing what the trauma is but not how it got there. Yeah I felt that.

Jonathan's comment's about repressed memories, depression and suicide literally left me in a ball of tears. I haven't felt this seen and understood in a long time.

I really appreciate your sympathy for those with suicidal thoughts. I've met people in the mental health industry that would shame you for it.

Everyone feels Simon was totally supportive, and he is. But everyone forgets that many on that crew supported her. Wash, Kaylie, Book, Inara, and especially Mal. All felt she was dangerous, and she was, but they didn't stop caring and support her. They all wanted to figure out how to help her.

"Find out in the next episode which you are going to watch right now!" Damn Straight! To borrow from River, I know what he's going to say, but I like hearing him say it.

I am both an empath and a trauma survivor myself. I love Firefly and I’m so glad y’all covered this.

TW: This show came to me at an incredibly difficult time. I lost my job, my house, my dad, my cousin and my aunt in a short period. During that time I also learned that my brother who I trusted more than any other person abused my daughter when she was 3-5 years old. My physical and mental health crumbled. This show helped me so much. I connected with Mal's distrust of the world and Rivers trauma. It took a while but life got better (and my daughter is thriving now too) but anytime I needed it I watched the series it was there. I don't know why it was so soothing to me.

My read on the increasing light exposure would be that it represents the moral of the story. If you try to force people to be better, you'll only make them worse. Light represents a force of good(making people better), but in reality that light becomes oppressive, it overloads your senses(which is how the reavers were made). This light was meant to burn the sin out of humanity, but it instead burned the humanity out leaving only room for sin

I'm pretty sure If I had a therapist likethis my issues would be resloved.

summer glau is honestly so iconic. i think she's trained in ballet and several other forms of dance, which informs her excellent choreography *o*

As a sister of a special needs brother, I really latched on to Simon. A lot of what he went through in relation to River I experienced and the rest I saw my parents go through. Simon is amazing because he's real. He loves his sister so much and would do anything for her, but he's also frustrated and stressed out by her and for her. So many emotional nuances that I have been through. And yet he still has a personality and identity outside of her! Just *chef's kiss*

Now I'm sorry I watched this (both serenity reactions) before i watched the actual show and movie... still gonna watch it now !

Summer Glau’s performance as River Tam is one of the finest pieces of work in any discipline (and it covers quite a few: acting, dancing, parkour, fighting, running) I can think of. From her leaping out of the box screaming… right up to her piloting Serenity out of atmo for the first time. Simply perfect.

Sarah Paulson knows how to scream with terror, what a skill!

As someone who was literally just talking to a therapist about having PTSD I really appreciate your compassion and understanding about it. It means a lot.

Also.. as someone with a loved one who recently made a surprising life-ending decision, I couldn’t appreciate more the comments about the strength of the fighter (even if they lost) and the comfort that it doesn’t mean they decided you weren’t worth fighting for enough.

Suddenly, someone is cutting onions in the room. I always felt guilty for living for my kids and husband; instead innately wanting to live like a "normal" person. You made realize that it is okay. Thank you

Firefly is my comfort show and Serenity is my comfort movie. I grew up watching this and I loved the chemistry between everyone.

I went thru a long period of trauma in my early childhood and have repressed memories from it. It's such a strange feeling. I described to to my therapist like those unlockable cutsceans and artifacts in vido games, you know, where there the whole big list with difrent items and then blanked out places. I rember the feelings, I rember hurting so so much but I cant rember why or how or where or who did it... I dont think I want to rember at this point

Listen to them and go watch Firely & Serenity Summer Glau is the most underrated actress. She is a rockstar

River and Simon were really the heart of Firefly. Mal was the hero, but those two were the humanity.

I can't count how many times my PTSD has said checking out is the only option. It's only keeping a list of ppl that it would hurt that keeps me enduring through those moments.

Where on earth did you find that shirt with the Fruity Oaty Bar?! That's insane! I never knew they even made anything like that!

I'd love for you to take a look at the "How to train your dragon" trilogy. Maybe with the focus on friendship, personal growth and saying goodbye to people to allow/enable them to grow. Watching Hickup say goodbye to Toothless was as heartbreaking as loosing Iron Man and Black Widow 💔

a note from my own internal battle with mental health: I thought the pain would never end no matter what I did or tried. Yet, my logical self said there is no way you could have experienced everything that would help because you haven't experienced everything in the world. My logical self talked my emotional self into realizing that it was okay to feel bad but that there were so many opportunities that I could explore to try to feel better. At that moment, my emotional and logical selves made a deal: I wouldn't move forward with pursuing suicide until I had tried everything I ever could to feel better (within reason, not drugs etc.) and experience more of life out there. This internal conversation and whole self acceptance of the pain I was feeling, especially in the face of not feeling I had that from the outside, was the most powerful therapeutic tool I had ever used. Not the psychotropics, but the will to accept myself for who I was then and that I knew I could keep trying even if I didn't always find the "fix" to the pain. In the face of so much emotional pain, it's healthy to try to throw some logic into it and talk yourself through those feelings. Talking through things with yourself is very, very healthy and I would recommend it to everyone who feels alone, not heard, and not understood. You are your own best friend and you can listen to yourself with love and compassion.

Re: the dark to the washed-out light. I always saw this as a visual reinforcement of them leaving the warm comfort of being 'in the dark' and approaching the harsh reality that River's been trapped in.

This movie looks really good and relatable since I have PTSD after surviving 3 decades of human trafficking. I don't really go around trying to shoot people, but I do remember being shot at, and being chased by people brandishing knives. I've always been a pacifist. I ran away and I climbed a lot of trees.

A few comments on what they've said so far: Part of what I've always seen in the head turn at Mal's "I think you're a person" is partially that... wait, you do? because I don't sometimes. Part of why she cocked the gun. Testing his belief. Because when you're deep in that hole.... someties you believe the voices, and someone not believing that you're awful and bad.... that can be genuinely surprising. It hurts, in a good way. Note how the moment they get into the hologram room things go back to the darkened lighting. River's anguish is relieved and the overexposure goes away. Also - darkness is Mal's comfort zone, so it makes sense that the brighter and more exposed the film is, the more uncomfortable and exposed Mal and friends feel. Part of River's "I'm okay" I feel isn't just being heard by the other crewmembers - but the realization in and of herself that she's not actually making things up. You make a big deal about how the crew believes her now, but as someone who's been in the depths, not of psychosis but of anxiety, depression, and also gaslighting, is that reaffirmation of "yes these are things I'm feeling and I'm not making it up, this memory I remember that hurt me is real" can be such a huge relief. About finding something more important - I've even seen people go "I have to take care of my cat and that's why I'm alive" and it's so honestly heartwrenching and heartwarming at the same time. I love River's "I like to hear you say it". It's one of the first times she makes a conscious and thoughtful decision in the movie. It's the first time she speaks about her preferences and not her trauma or fears. And it's a boundary in a way. It's her first time showing agency over her self and her relationships from a place of calm. "I can read your mind. But I'd prefer you say itout loud, because I like you talking to me." And also the healthy acknowledgement of her powers which was a huge issue for her during the series, too!

I cannot believe that I am JUST NOW discovering this channel! I absolutely adore this movie, and I am loving your guys’ interpretation and breakdown. Your channel is one of the greatest things that’s happened to me this year (not that it’s hard with how sucky this year has been). Keep up the fantastic content!

I endured 20 years of psychological abuse, and I have so many repressed memories. I realised, watching this video, that I also seek out triggers sometimes, probably because I want to know what these memories hold. It hurts though, to find them. But it helps as well.

You know what I've seen every episode dozens of times I've watched the movie dozens of times, but I think I'm still going to take your advice and binge it this weekend anyway.

this show, it has the absolute best dialogue i have ever heard. the way they say things is an art as much as it’s meant to give information. i’m honestly so sad that Joss hasn’t gotten the opportunity or tried to do something more like this again. it’s just so... good.

I love that fight scene, seeing River absolutely kicking a$$. It's so satisfying seeing how her fighting isn't just connected to her getting triggered anymore and just shows it like the fight is a dance for her, "she always did love to dance". She manages to use that as her fighting technique.

I have a soft spot for sibling love, like, with the Winchester brothers, and Simon's love for River touches me deeply. In every scene between them, especially when River has just done something out of control and Si tries to comfort her... I always gasp. He may not have the biggest character arc in the show (as I've read), but his consistency in taking care of River and protecting her makes it worth watching to me.

When you said that about kids keeping your clients from taking their own lives... that hit me hard. I said the same thing in a session when I was at my lowest. I talked about my son being my only purpose, and then I felt terrible for a while because I didn't think that was fair to put on him. It was a whole mess of self-loathing.

Firefly ❤ it's so wonderful. And can I say your goofy ending to this episode actually made me smile, and I appreciate it. I think I'll talk to my best friend now, admit how hard today was. Thanks for all you do, guys. I'm so glad I found this channel. I'm in so much debt with vet bills, and I have other medical bills now of my own, and can't afford therapy because I'm paycheck to paycheck already...but I also have some amazing friends, and videos like this to help me be more self aware and able to pick apart my feelings so I can work through them.

My fiance has yet to forgive me for this movie. I showed him Firefly nothing about it. He asked me seriously if I had season 2. Then we watched this together. lol. I think he has still held onto the grudge. Thank you for your kindness on suicide and those suffering. I have had suicidal ideation for two decades and it is exhausting (started when I was about ten). Hearing people who don't judge always makes me feel a but lighter

When I first watched Firefly and Serenity, I don't think I realised why River spoke to me so much. Watching it back with more awareness of my cPTSD, I think seeing her as a fellow trauma survivor was a big part of it. There's a couple of lines that went round and round my head when I first watched it. "It isn't mine! The memory it isn't mine and I shouldn't have to carry it it isn't mine!" and "Please God, make me a stone."

That hologram message really messes me up whenever I see it. Uhg, the sound, the fact she tried to kill herself before the reavers get to her. I have too good of an imagination. It actually makes me feel sick. It’s good but man does it mess me up.

The fun thing about watching this series is that when I go back to watch these movies they become more fun and exciting. Also as a non filmmaker or psychologist I can see different sides to the movies that I originally never thought of.

Having someone support you is key. The worst experience I ever had was when I came to my sister and told her I was suicidal, and she responded with "If you were really suicidal, you'd just do it. Stop trying to get attention." It broke me. Luckily, I now have a great support system with my spouse's family, and I'm starting on my curve back toward thriving :) I just found your videos, and they're great. Thanks guys!

Unfortunately, I had to change videos in the middle due to triggers. But I really wanted to reach out and say thank you for talking about this topic. It’s an uncommon topic to be discussed public ally and I sincerely appreciate it ❤️