INFJ here😊 I think that on the surface people are confused by me, creative yet analytical, introverted yet intuitive and connected, cautious yet compassionate. I feel like a shade of grey in a world that is more comfortable with seeing black and white.

Yup our motto is honesty and authenticity. We, INFJs, are literally allergic to lies or dishonesty of any kind.

As an INFJ, I find that Malignant personality types are drawn to me and others like me. This has made my life very difficult, but now, I find that it's like a moth to a flame. They always desire what they cannot reach within themselves, but somehow think my light will rub off on them. I wish it could've, as they are in dark places that I have seen, but refuse to tread. Unfortunately, they live there every day. I have empathy for these individuals, but offer no emotional investment.

My Therapist that I've known for nearly 11 years always asks if I still need Therapy because I already can sense what he's about to tell me. There was one time on Facebook another INFJ asked for some advice and she gave very little information on how she was feeling. I ended up typing an essay to explain why she might be feeling that way. When I talked to my Therapist he said, "You got all of that from a few sentences and very little information are you sure you still need me?" People love how I can understand and break down their thoughts into bite sized pieces for them to be able to understand it for themselves. It's one of my strengths and weaknesses. As most INFJs I tend to have loads of Narcissists come into my life and take advantage of my good side until they see my bad side and play victim.

I'm an INFJ and relate to everything you said except for one thing. I can actually be quite verbally aggressive when I'm insulted or treated badly in some other way - although this usually takes shape in very close relationships, not generally. I have a strong will.

I am an INFJ and can relate 100%. Some people find it hard to believe I can apply either logic or emotion to a situation, it seems to baffle them. Definitely a 'counsellor' and use my judgement based on facts /information when considering something.. but not judgemental. Thank you for this video Darren.

INFJ here...emotionally connected to the spirit world, high achiever, compassion, sensitive, creative, empathic, individualistic, intuitive...caring, misunderstood by some. The description in the video.

I am an INFJ with aspergers and am female. I find that autism only compounds the INFJ things. I truly wish I could be more assertive, and wish I could find real friendship with others. Edited to add: Chronic health issues are the bane of my existence, as they vastly hinder my praxis. I think and dream a lot, but am physically limited painfully.

I am lucky enough to be married to an INFJ. I consider myself the luckiest person on earth! She calls on my IT skills all the time. There is something about the hidden intuitive command structure she doesn’t get. I keep trying though. You are describing her exactly. She does not avoid conflict but rather is driven to resolve conflict when it meets her skill set. She is incredibly supportive and helpful to relatives who need help and encouragement to reach their potential. She is competitive but only with herself. She seems addicted to ‘Judge Judy’. She admires how Judge Judy can see through the nonsense and get to the truth. She is slightly critical of her when the judgements don’t precisely follow existing rental housing law ( it is my wife’s area of expertise).

Finding I was an INFJ late in life really helped me understand my past and why I'd been through some of the things that I have. Apparently, this is the most recent of all the personality types to evolve and many psychologists claim it shouldn't really exist! We don't have many friends, so I checked all three of mine with the MB test: INFJ, ENFJ/A and ENFJ/T. You see, even without realising it, I have been drawn to intuative feelers, and even have an ENFP daughter.

Thank you so much for this! I also took that test a while ago and got the INFJ. Now that I know all of this, I can confirm it's true and I'm PROUD TO BE ONE.

Thank you for this video! Years ago I tested as an INTJ, then over the last 2 years as an INFJ, with 52/48 percent F/T. I'm a very artistic as well as a scientific sort, so that seems to fit. My healing path has brought my inner "F" to the foreground, it seems. I'd also appreciate a video about INFJs and CPTSD from childhood!

Can you talk about the infj that has complex ptsd after childhood abuse, please?

As someone who has struggled with self criticism surrounded by a world where I can remain unseen, I do feel that understanding oneself, connecting fully with our inner voice and trusting our gut are important spiritual journeys that we must undertake to make sense of the turmoil that ravages our minds constantly. I would liken it to a wildfire that will burn everyone and everything in its path (including ourself) unless we can learn to harness it (through self care, introspection and meditation) and if successful we can be a source of warmth, comfort and healing to those around us. Peace.

I’ve struggled with the test so after watching 100s of INFJ videos I realised I can’t b anything else, my past and present all makes sense since understanding these 4 letters.

We get very wise as we get older, we store a lot of files in our unconscience,and can tap into it when we need it to help us it's a storehouse of experiences and knowledge, everything you say in the video is sot on ,thanks Darren 👍👍👍❤️

Yes, pretty accurate for my personality. I took the test years ago & was INTJ. Then, I took it again about two years ago, to grown into INFJ-A = advocate. This was after I became a full time carer, for my late wife. I wasn’t surprised. I don’t seek conflict, but if I get drawn into one, you will find INFJ a formidable opponent that will definitely not loose.

Tested as an infj consistently over decades and felt relieved after the first test to know/ understand /accept more about myself. It's great for an infj to learn more about themselves especially when we feel confused by our own complexity. But often I do wonder if some people take this info (on infj traits etc) to use it against us for their own gain. Ps. Infp's are awesome people in general and great ppl to have in your corner :)

I consistently test as an INFJ. Much of this rings true. Though, I am not necessarily organized, productive, or a peacekeeper. Could be that I also have ADHD, which may override some traits. Thanks for your video. They're great.

Thank you, I enjoyed this. Twenty years ago I met a gentleman that I was immediately drawn to...the conversation was intellectually stimulating and we understood the subtleties of each other's sense of humor right away. After many conversations discussing/debating political policy, social issues, and life in general, it wasn't long before he asked me if I would do three things for him...analyze a poem, take an IQ test, and take the MBTI personality test. I have no recollection of the poem analysis responses (this was 20 years ago) but forwarded the other test results to him. The IQ test was amusing (showed me at 156, I am definitely lower). This was my first exposure to the MBTI test but he came right back and said he was an INFJ, too. He would remain the most rewarding, supportive, comfortable and richly enduring friendship that I have ever experienced lasting until he passed, almost 20 years to the day, from when we met. Your assessment of an INFJ, in our case, is the most seemingly accurate that I have come across....the complimentary comfort level, the trust, the intellectual stimuli, the mutual respect and supportive nature, for us, was as good as it gets.

They are NPD magnets.

No I don't like conflict nor am I aggressive... However if I see injustice or targeted bullying towards another (in any environment... my family is on another level), I'll watch and assess and then stand up for the injured person... I'll 'call out' the behaviour of the 'aggressor' by bringing attention to their behaviour and question them as to why they are behaving that way... I debate using logic and what I know is truth. I've been told I have an intense prolonged stare and I'm hard to read and get to know... I feel like I'm a fringe dweller but I'm a happy loner... A type A personality, my own worst enemy when it comes to not achieving my goals... I'm highly creative and I'm a health professional.

I am an INFJ and my son is INFP. I try not to take it to seriously but we both identify with everything on the lists for each. Interesting that you do too. Thank you for this video, the clearest and most concise one I've heard yet on this topic.

Great video! Definitely an interesting topic. I would love to see a video about the INFP personality!

Strange to hear some yt channel doc that I've never met or talked to that has described me to a "T" after a history of being misjudged.

I believe I am INFJ but came to this late in life. I am not the same person I was when young. Is this possible to arrive at your personality type late in life? I ask because I have done much inner work to become who I am today. Thanks for a very interesting video😊

I fit in the most traits of the INFJ personality's you presented. Where there seem to be a problem with me, I'm not competitive and don't have the fear of being beaten. I even prefer working alone or with some selected collaborators.

Another INFJ here, that was actually incredibly accurate for me, I am literally EVERYTHING this guy has just said. Nice one!

This description fits the person I married; but in the end, (after 20 years) it was evident he was a cunning narcissist. The result of this experience is that I am suspicious of the extent to which many people are genuine and well intentioned.

Thank you. This video was helpful and encouraging. My struggle is being an INFJ with ADHD and CPTSD. It’s a challenging combination, but learning more helps.

Helps explain why I keep attracting Narcissistic men. Wow, the puzzle pieces are coming together. Thank you Mr. Darren.

I'm a conflict avoider. I guess I have two possible reasons: one, being an INFJ; and two, having a Mars in Libra, which is kind of a pacifist astrological position in which to have Mars, I guess.

Could you please discuss Angrophobia (the fear of getting mad) in an episode? This is very difficult to deal with, the somatic feeling that anger of any degree is dangerous and can potentially destroy your life. You shut your anger down immediately and fawn or freeze so as not to trigger a confrontation and then later feel disgust, depression, and resentment that you then turn back in to that suppression cycle. The scary thing is that you know the anger will come out eventually and when it does, you won't be able to control it and it most likely will destroy everything. How do you get past the feeling that you're not allowed to feel or express anger?

Yup mostly infj's here listening and learning how to defend ourselves from narcessists

Hi Darren, this was very informative as always. I love your channel. Your voice is so nice and I really enjoy hearing your accent. I am an INFP too🙂. This is the second rarest among the types of MeyersBriggs, isn't it? Greetings from Germany 👋

Very insightful - thank you!

I was given this test a few times. I got INFJ. One time it was to help figure out what I wanted to do after university. Recommendations based on my type were: teacher, clergy, police officer. I teach.

Thank you for this video too, great one! ❤

I'd never heard of this category before this video. It does help explain the many, many situations in my life (I'm now in my late 70s) in which I was judged to be a snob & therefore ostracised, or as a mystery to therapists who then insisted on judging me according to their incomplete book learning, or as an egotist who needs to be brought down a peg or 2 because I've focused intently, all my life, on artwork & piano and became accomplished in both. As I've also learned ALOT about narcissists (in surviving being the focus of a few), I recognized really quickly the intent of a recent person who was about to set me up for public humiliation! That person got dealt a surprise! Yes, as someone else remarked, there is confusion about people of this category. Now I will have to learn more about us; that it's an actual category! 😮😊

Excellent video

What a wonderful interview and discussion on this MBTI type for INFJ. I got a few MBTI ideas for my channel. I discovered your channel through the KZfaq algorithm. Fascinating!🔥🔥🔥

I’m one of these advocates !!! Yes we have many sides. It’s sometimes very difficult to be one of these. Esp when dealing with others who dont have the same qualities like respect loyalty

Oh boy, this is me! Never heard of it so many thanks Darren.

Thanks for this Darren, Yes I'm an INFJ too! I discovered this in College when I was 42... It was the most meaningful thing I have ever learned!!! 🎉 Even though I loved my course and was an honours graduate! 🙂

You are my new best friend, Darren! 😂 You hit the nail on every point and didn’t miss a beat! Ha! I am definitely purposeful, a gracious winner… a real life coach/counselor who has integrity and values authenticity. I am more forgiving and never hold a grudge. I love coaching and fully enjoy adding value to others. Wow! Wow! Such great insight! ! Thank you for shedding light on the INFJ personality type. This was great! PS: I took the assessment moons ago, and am an INFJ. However, I am now wondering if this can change during different seasons of our lives?

Yes ❤ Who knows maybe there is something in it? ❤ Thank you Darren.

So interesting, thank you. I hope you do a video on the INFP-T !!

I’m an INFJ. Thank you for this video.☺️ I’m feeling more and more comfortable with who I am.

I used to always test as INFJ but on the boarder between I and E as well as J and P. Now I test as INFP.

What a cool surprise!

Yessss thanks absolutely. Heyoka INFJ here ,,spot on appreciate u

INFJ Middle Lost Child Therapist here… growing up and even adulthood attracts mixed results. I feel like I live in the “in between” of life and not very many people “get it” so it makes for an interesting (notice I didn’t say lonely) journey. This is quite accurate… probably one of the most nuanced and accurate descriptions I’ve come across. It really showcases our dual natures.

Yes!!! INFJ here :) thanks Darren!

Before checking out YT, I was taking the Sakinorva test so seeing your most recent vid talking about an MBTI type is rather amusing; at least for me. Majority of my friends are INFPs, too, so now I get why I like the vibe you give out. Regarding INFJs, they do have the extensive list of positive traits, and on paper they'd be people I think I'd get along with. But my personal experiences with people who identified with the type weren't that great. Maybe it's just confirmation bias on my part, being aware that my abuser identified as an INFJ, but I've become careful around those who claim to be the type over time.

My query is, how can an INFJ get blinded and controlled for years by a narcissist?

I have this but I had no idea it wasn't common.

Hey! I just love your videos! They are very usefull to me! Some of them I have in their own folder, and watch over and over. They are great, and often funny too, even with such a gloomy and serious subject. I love them! Thanks! 🫶 But right now I just wanna say that we have excatly the same BriggsMeyer type…!!😃👍🏻I can most defintly live with sharing that with you! 🙂🙂🙂😀👍🏻even with the T after 😉 I think we are pretty rare too, but not sure.

Can you please do the same video breakdown for INTP-T's? Narcissists get us too and we also only form approx 2% of the population

WOW! I did not know that I was and INFJ. Thank you so very much.

So, I'm curious... I used to test as INFP, but now I test as INFJ. I've tried to find information on this, but the people I've asked have been a bit hostile about it. They say you can't be two personality types, and you can't change over the course of your life. I took the tests as honestly as I could, and those are the results I got. I wondered if you could offer any insight as to why the results changed over time.

This was good. Thank you. Only thing that doesn't resonate at all is the non-aggression bit. I have aggression, but it was something that became more conscious later in life. Was definitely more on the timid side when I was younger but I attribute that to repression.

I'm INFJ-T, it says my 'Turbulent' is 94%, does anyone have any insight as to what this means? 🙂 I feel like you've just described me, Darren! Cuddle lovely Freud for me 🥰🐾 Edit: mine is called 'The Advocate' apparently 🙂 Any time I've had to advocate, I've done so well with lots of backed research and caring to get it right. So I guess it fits 😃

OMG. I've been a super dedicated teacher and mom for almost three decades and this might be me...But I was married to a mid-range [sometimes sliding up the scale to decent, sometimes dipping into the malignant range when supply was replaced by pressure] narcissist for 34 years and boy, it did not bring out the best in me, so maybe I'm not. I'd have to learn about the other 15 character types. I'd have to assess if Meyers Briggs were valid, or just a more sophisticated version of Astrology. Thing is, people think I'm an open book. I've even been told I wear my heart on my sleeve, from someone who had no idea of the crazy, insanely painful stuff I was going through at the time. That's when I realized I use bubbling and charm to deflect being seen. Its a type of camouflage. Moreover, if I am chatting away, appearing to be vulnerable with someone, or self-absorbed, with that nervous energy, it's a sign I'm with someone I will never be able to truly trust or connect with. It's a pattern I learned at my narc parents' knees, to keep safe from the rejection and punishment. To keep the surface of things smooth. The conditions of worth were quite clear: Be an A student and a delight at all times, or else. I'm in my 60's now and finally really starting to figure this stuff out. I'm grateful I've lived long enough to get this far.

Please share more videos on other personality types like INFP-A

Understanding, yet rarely understood.

Ok so am I an INFJ or am I traumatized? Lol. I always knew I was an INFJ but put this idea away as fluff thinking I was like this because I was traumatized. I wonder how many INFJ's have high ACE scores too?!

My kids did the test & got me to do it. Yup! INFJ. You just read me exactly!

I thought you were INFP now I know for sure. INFP males are amazing.

An IFNJ sounds like me, Thanks Darren for this topic

I have taken the "test" of various versions of this & they all say I am "INFJ-A" (advocate). I assume that means I tend to speak up for others. I could be incorrect though.

I’m the extroverted one..ENFJ. I teach and studying to be a psychotherapist/counsellor. I would operate similarly

I’m not keen on labels

I’m also INFP-T and have always take a mediator role. Husband is INFJ-A

I was married to an INFJ who was also a covert abusive narcissist!

I'm an INFJ and this describes me exactly.

I also forgot to add, I believe the daughter of the Myers Brigg parents developed the 1st five love languages tests.

I think you just described me

This is my personality, infj. My Granddaughter is infp.

I think I'm INFP myself which is pretty similar

I’m a Scorpio and INFJ and just want to hide in my reclusive cave. I only like my immediate family and love humanity as a whole from a distance. I’m weird, passionate, reserved, possible psychotic lol.

Can personality types change a bit over time? When I was young I was a strong intf but recently I have become more intuitive and more feeling orientated...since my major stroke...I recently redid that meyers- briggs test and I ended up with infj which floored me at first... but there has been a huge difference/shift in the way I process info...before it was all logic and in my head per se...now it's mainly intuition...I even read people very differently now too...before it was. by what they say and body language aka externally... but now it's more a peering inside of them, reading their intent and essence and a sensing from a spiritual aspect...it's very different btw..im a very spiritual oriented person with very high biblical ethics and a seer.....no not a fortune teller or a psychic...but a seer...biggy difference here! I help in the field of prophecy and am a teacher of high spiritual rhema...my calling is in helping others thru the gifts G_d has given me.

I think I am but never bothered with the test

I’m an INFJ and I’m a nurse 🤷🏽‍♀️

You sound just like Michael Pierce

Are INFJs the same Sigmas or Cancers? How many of you were born in late June or early July? I'm sencing a pattern here. :)

KiaOra Darren. Do you have a link to Myers Briggs test please? New to the subject, I have no idea what it is. Thank you.

ehhh..i debated leaving a comment, argued with self almost a half hour..guess which side won......being a true INFJ Aspie (with a healthy dose of Synesthesia)..i was predestined before birth to comment on this topic..lol..(rather, i am doomed to) Real mum died when i was born..dad remarried when i was 2...step mum hated my existence...she was a Huge Narc with strong psychopathic tendencies which included her killing small animals after torturing them, even when she was a small child, her whole family had this condition, some were in prison for murders....and one day after one of her worst fits...i asked her......why? & she paused for a sec then said....because you scare me. (i was 8 yrs old & cowering in the corner, but refusing to cry, during or after the beating, Not gonna even whimper where she could see it.) Many yrs later, one day out of the blue, she said i scared her because i survived things no one should have & i was reading by age 3..etc..she said i was not human. Couldn't be. But i was Good, so, not a demon..& that left one other thing & it scared her. had no comment...the shock threw me. Fast Forward another 20 yrs, when i am helping her get out of bed & onto her commode she said some nasty insult i do not recall, but it included a warning about her son being jealous & wanting me dead, he had inherited her families condition(along with everything else including my fathers estate, dad feared him)..& i said..he gets everything handed to him on a silver platter, what on earth is there to be jealous of? i have Nothing. & she said they were jealous of me...because i was Strong. The guy is a friggen drug dealer.....and he's weaker than me? idts. the worst thing is...sometimes they actually believe the crazy malarkey that comes out of their mouths. What else to say, to do....i just sighed & fluffed her pillows & smoothed the sheets & turned her TV on, then went back to my chair to wait till she was ready for her bed again. No comment in the english language would help this mindset.

DFM 👍

Are you an INFJ Darren?

🙌👏🙌👏🙌👏

Im infj -

INFJ dealing with a malignant narcissist = no beuno

ethnic human rights isn't an extremist position.

I thought these werent valid anymore

Scapegoated targeted and bullied by people who will never know us lol