this man is a national treasure

You know, in hindsight, Stan talked about the apocalypse coming quite common. We know he listened to FM radio, but I wonder how much of that apocalypse prepping was because of Stanford’s journals and the portal.

''yes, YES. Burn the child'' and ''The tax collector! You found me!'' are two of my favorite Stan lines

"I put up with this pig the entire summer, now it's your parents turn" followed by the bus driver telling him animals aren't allowed on, and him pulling out his brass knuckles, is still one of my favorite moments.

"KIDSS!!! I CAN'T FIND THE REMOTE AND I REFUSE TO STAND UP!" Stan is mood

"Grunkle Stan, are you blindfolded too?" "Nah, but with these cataracts I might as well be. What is that, a woodpecker?" Legitimately one of my favorite lines in existence.

It's hard to pick a favorite stan line when they're all this good.

"I'm Stan and I was Wrong, I'm singing the Stan Wrong Song"

"Some people say it's wrong for a man to love a wax replica of himself." "I, uh, couldn't find the remote." "That's why I'm so hard on Dipper. So when the world fights him, he fights back." "Heh, fighting back :)" "You know, I can still drop you." "Soos, would it be wrong to punch a child?" "What the H??" "I'm gonna smother 'em with fun!" "Can I have my hands back? I have a certain gesture I'd like to share with you." "Welp, this is gettin' weird." "Or maybe these rare photos of American Presidents?" "Shh, stress will make you chewy." "Here, sweetie, blow something up for your Grunkle Stan." Just some honorable mentions of my favorite Stan lines

"When theres no cops around ANYTHINGS legal!" Still quotable to this day

My favorite stan line will always be the hysterical "MONEYYYYYYYY"

0:47 I just realized, Stan owns ten guns yet still predominantly uses brass knuckles or a baseball bat for some reason. Was he lying about the guns? Did he forget he had them? These are questions that may never be answered.

“Kids, if I die, make sure I get a bigger tombstone than ford” “Man wants his privacy, I can respect that, *throws grappling hook over gate* , welp, everyone over the fence” “That’s what I’m saying, AAUGH, *throws tv out the window* , I, uh, couldn’t find the remote

"Children fighting, I can sell this!"

“He’s a pathetic wimp. No one wants to be around him. That’s what they said about me”

Definitely secretly the funniest character on the show

“I will not hesitate to use the hose on the elderly!”

“Can I please have my hands back? There’s a very important gesture I like to show you” *Welcome back to “YOU CAN’T SAY THAT ON TELEVISION!”*

"Yes, yes, burn the child" will never fail to make me laugh.

0:14 I love how S&P let this go through, but refused to let the summerween party flyer say "bottles will be spun" Funny that Alex Hirsh saw this, and so replaced that part of the flyer with "Not S&P" approved and THAT got approrved

“There is absolutely NOTHING about this that I understand.” “After All these years, I finally have them all.” “He’s family.. he won’t bite..” “Eanie Meanie Mineie.. YOU.” “Can it Poindexter.” “Looks like you’re at the creepy age where you stare at girls.” “Tryin WAY to hard, -50 Suck-Up points.” “Now to wait 15 hours until the pool opens in the morning………. This was a good plan.” Can you do another video of this stuff please? “A gambler never reveals their secrets.” “Woah lady, that’s one ugly baby!” Edit: thank you for all of the likes

"Sir, would you like to buy a Stan-Vac vacuum? Stan-Vac: it sucks more than anything"

One of my favourite Stan quotes will always be “The man wants his privacy. I can respect that” *Proceeds to climb over the fence*

" when life gives you lemons, you call 'em yellow oranges and you sell them for double price! "

“There’s no cops in the forest. We take this to our graves.” -Stan Pines

4:37 “$20? I’ll just take them when you’re not looking.” “What?” “I said I was gonna rob you.” Definitely my top 5 favorite Stan lines

I find it funny when Stan's pupils go opposite ways at random times

3:31 Part of the "Uncle Code"

This is the only collection of his that I have seen that doesn’t end with him beating Bill. Respect for that.

“Everything I cared about. Its all for this family” Did they really slip this past us

4:33 I find it kinda cool yet weird that Bill cipher mentions buying gold and its something Stan brings up too . Nice little detail and just found it kinda funky

“You kids were a nuisance this whole summer.” *hugs dipper and mable while crying* God I love grunkle Stan

I forget how funny Grunkle Stan was 😂 I mean, the whole show is hilarious, but Stan really delivers the humor that even older audiences enjoy

1:46 LOL! I love the way he said that. Road safety laws, prepare to be IGNORED!🤣❤️

*While running by, grabbing as much as he can* "MONEEEEEYYYYY!"

“When there’s no cops around, anything’s legal!” Is one I still use frequently

2:32 Lord of the Flies reference

“MONEY!!!!!” made me actually laugh out loud, therefore, I can say, 4:02lol

when you’re a kid you think Soos and Mable are the gems of this show, when you’re an adult you realize Dipper and Stan are the gems of this show and that Soos is sadly just relatable

0:05Stan predicted Weirdmageddon

4:50 *WHEEZING SOUND*

"No te preocupas! Vamos! Vamos!"

Stan: Here ya go sweetie, set something on fire for me Mable : I AM THE GOD OF DESTRUCTION!!! Stan: what is that? A ladybug? (Same episode too) And Stan: it took him... It took waddles... Also Stan: good news, you're getting a puppy!

Grunkle Stan is literally the master of quotes.

“What is that, a woodpecker?-“ Proceeds to crash through trees

"BEHOLD! The Sascrotch" "I'd fire all of you if I could" "Here we have rock that looks like a face rock a rock that looks like a face"

0:58 ok Mr White

2:18 didn't the Al Bundy said something like that - ...did you missed me ? - With every bullet so far...

I will never not laugh hysterically when I hear "her aim is getting better." Idk why, but the way he says it got me dying

2:00 me and my friends going somewhere and they let me drive 💀

Stan is one of my favorite characters.

2:41 i thought this wasnt from gravity falls

One of my favorite Stan lines is, “Do you mean crimes in general, or just the specific ones committed by m-“

i can’t believe it’s been 10 years since this amazing show was created. one of the bests ever imo and i still watch it on a daily basis. my sister and i have like every single line memorized loll

I feel like his final words to Bill would have been a good place to end the video.

2:06 "what is that a woodpecker?" *dies*

My favorite part about Stan's hysterical "MONEY!!!!" scene is how Ford's just staring into the distance, completely still, not even reacting to him like the others did.

Some of my favorite Grunkle Stan quotes: "After all these years, finally, I have them all!" "Children fighting! I can sell this!" "When there's no cop's around, anything is legal" "MONEEEEYYYY!!!!" "Yes, yes burn the child!" "Teach kids swears, that'll bring 'em into the real world!" "Finally a good reason to punch a teenager in the face!" "Wait, I'm alone, I can swear for real! SON OF A-" And finally, my all time favorite: "My ex-wife still misses me, BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!!!"

“I’m giving none of this to charity” BROOO😭

These are more out of context than gravity falls out of context Loved the vid

"Soos, would it be wrong to punch a child?" Is my favorite line ever😂

God, I didn't realize just how many God tier quotes he had

“Don’t think just because I have amnesia that I’m gonna give you a raise Soos”

When there’s no cops around, anything’s legal “That’s right, these pins are hidden cameras, and my hearing aid was picking up the feedback. Who’s the fraud now?” “Wait, wait stop everything! I’ve got something to say!” “Finally, a good reason to punch a teenager in the face!” “It all begins with this little fella, the pituitary gland. He may be little, but he has *big plans.*” “He’s really comin’ along. When push comes to shove, I’m actually proud of him. Just don’t ever tell him that. His head’s big enough as it is.” “All right, maybe I haven’t been the best summer caretaker. But I swear, today we’re gonna have some real family fun. Now who wants to put on some blindfolds and get into my car?” “Sometimes I think, is this all there is? Is life just, some horrific joke, without a punch line? That we’re all just biding our time until the sweet, sweet release of death?” Kids! I can’t find the remote and I refuse to stand up!” “Just ten minutes, without this pig in the house. Is that so much to ask?” That is all his quotes I remember

"you know what? being loved is overrated." *"BUT FEAR IS PRICELESS!"*

Can we just talk about how he predicted the apocalypse Thanks for including my comment :)

THE role model for anyone

"Sometimes a man has to steal an animatronic badger, to stay in this crazy game called life." I seriously want this on a T-shirt, something about it sounds so relatable.

"Sorry Stan, you've got a flight to catch." "Oh yeah? _So do you."_

0:22 my dad on KZfaq

“ My ex-wife still misses me……” “BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER “

I live by 1:15

"Well, I can't argue with Dr. Medicine..." "TO THE HOSPITAL HONEY PANTS!!!"

I swear “Put ‘em on an island and make them fight for dominance! Also teach kids swears” is a Lord of the Flies reference

"When there's no cops around, anything's legal!"

"Heh..fighting back." "Who wants Stan-cakes? They're like pancakes, but I think I got some of my hair in them." "FROM HECK'S HEART, I STAB AT THEEE!!"

One of my favourite quotes from Stan is “I’ll grammar Stanley you!”

3:01 without context that sounds so wrong

0:52 is straigt out of breaking bad

"hey, grunkle Stan, ever kissed a pig before?" "i'm not gonna answer that question"

3:39 BRUH THIS HAS TO BE MEANT DIFFERENT THEN I THINK LMAO

“Doo doo do, this is the driving song, can’t really see where i’m going.”

“I have a certain ‘gesture’ I’d like to share with you”

People forgot a few good ones. "I'm gonna have to use my old man powers" "In my day, zeppelins fell from the sky like raindrops" The scene with Stan's belly in Dreamscaperers

“Shhh shhh! Stress will make you chewy.”

“It’s like coffee and nightmares had a baby” - my favorite stan quote

You forgot my favourite one. “Soos, would it be wrong to punch a child!”

"Finally a good reason to punch a teenager in the face" !

the fact im watching this with the sound off but can still hear stan 😭😭

If i died, make sure my tombstone'd be bigger than Ford's.

"We'd have to break in and- JUST KIDDING LET'S BREAK IN!"

That just put me 90 minutes closer to death.

“That llama knew too much”

"I regularly commit massive tax fraud" Best quote, nearly gonna be real lmao

Stan's car is immortal

This is honestly the first time I did one of these. Good work on it

I feel like everyone in The pines family has a talent of being hilarious and making the viewers laugh the shit out of ourselves by their lines 🤣😂😆

"Yes yes... Burn the child... 🗿"

Literally everything that comes out of this man’s mouth is gold.

owl, owl, cmooon owl! FOOTBALL PLAYER WITH AN OMELETTE!?