“Medically assisted self harm” How have we fallen so far? I wish this young man all the best in the world.

It's so sad how people treated you when you came out as detrans. You're such an intelligent young man. I'm sorry you went through any of this. Thank you for speaking about your experience. It's powerful. I hope you'll help many gay boys struggling with homophobia to know they can get through it and live a great life. 🌼

Thank you Kobe, for speaking out.

"You're the perfect/ideal candidate!" is a sentence many of these butchers use apparently. So manipulative...

Our society has failed these vulnerable kids so horribly.

Wow he’s incredibly mature and able to intelligently recount his experience, especially considering how recently he detransitioned. A strong and brave man! His voice will help many men in a similar position.

One day the world is going to wake up to how society is shaping its young. Children are the future and too many are finding it hell on earth 😭

I think Kobe is right that transition helps us (male to female transgender people) avoid responsibility. Being a man takes a certain level of responsibility and accountability that's terrifying to me. It's something that isn't talked about enough. There's a 'Peter pan' aspect to it, and I can feel it in my soul.

It’s a story of child abuse. All the twisted professionals out there. Everybody exploited him. I hope Kobe finds some special person to help him recover.

Kobe you are very brave to tell your story. You are not alone there are many others who have de transitioned. Telling your story may save other children, from having to go through, what you have. Good luck in your future.

I transitioned and completed my SRS years before any of my nieces & my nephew were born. It was not something I felt I needed to speak to them about. For me it had been a personal mind and body mismatch issue that I had fixed then moved on with my life as if the issue had never existed. As my nieces were growing up I had a strong feeling that one of my nieces was going to grow up to be lesbian. I never mentioned it to anyone. Fast forward 25 years or so my niece had grown up and come out as lesbian. By this time she knew I was transsexual but we had still not had a conversation about it. Then one day she told me that she knew that she had figured it out a good few years ago after seeing some old pictures of me as a child growing up at my mum's house. She then said had I not been her auntie and had she been 10 years younger she could have easily gotten caught up in the idea of being trans and needing to transition to be happy with all this so-called trans-awareness. She said in a perfect world I would have been born male but am not. I'm a butch lesbian and I accept that. I then told her I had realized that she was going to grow up to be lesbian when she was young. She asked me why did you not tell me. I said it was up to you to discover that for yourself and not for me to be putting ideas into your head. I said I would have been there for you had you needed to confide in someone. Many of today's trans folk are too quick to encourage others to take the same path. It should not be taught in schools. The fact that there was no mention of it when I was in school is what helped confirm to me that I was different. It seems now many schools are telling kids being trans is an option. All that will do is confuse and encourage some to experiment in something that would've never crossed their minds otherwise. This will mess up way more kids minds than it would help in the tiny tiny minority who would grow up to be transsexual regardless. Kids do not need to be spoon fed this crap. Schools need to let them be kids and stop trying to mould them into something they are not. I am now 58 & approaching 4 decades Post-Op and still happy with the path I took. Being transsexual is a rare thing. A lot of what we are seeing now is social contagion drawing the youth of today in and CD's/TV's AGP's jumping on the bandwagon. People need to look at the bigger picture & dissect it into the relevant boxes. Then look and see which are the ones the most visible/vocal and making the most noise and crazy demands while stamping their feet and branding folk transphobic just to shut down any sensible conversation. . Then take note how much they commit to being what they claim to be. Here is my take on all this madness. As I said I am an old school Post-Op Transsexual who is closing on 4 decades Post-Op. This is utter madness at its best ! It's gone from transsexuals fixing a personal mind and body mismatch issue with one's self and then getting on with our lives unnoticed as best we can. To folk now who do not want to make any effort to be what they claim to be who actually thrive on the attention and privileges it grants them under the term transgender with all these new woke laws etc. Many are out to make others around them change their perceptions of what a woman is or fall foul of the woke policing. It is lunacy at its best. I get labelled at TERF quite often because I will not side with these folks and their crazy demands and expectations. Transsexuals should not even be lumped under the term transgender as far as I am concerned. It's not even in the same postcode. I find all this very demeaning of all I went through and suffered growing up in the 1970's and early 1980s to be happy within my own skin. They tried to force me to change who I was back in 1977 when I was only 13 here. county asylums Stanley Royd's Wakefield . They could not force me to change who I was or deter me and that taught me that it would be just as wrong to try to force people to understand or accept me too. My intentions and actions back then were to change myself so I could be happy within my own skin, not to force the world around me to change or pay the price. There are different definitions of the word TRANSGENDER , The most prevalent is those who are political in nature and refers to anyone who considers themselves as different in terms of sex or gender. Most transsexual persons refuse to be lumped in with the TG Community, but others like non-op TG persons see political value in working together. A transgender person is someone who deliberately lives in a way opposed to their physical sex. For example, if a person is born with female genitalia and wants to keep it, but expresses and feels that they are a boy mentally, then they are transgender. Transsexual and transgender is not the same thing as transsexual is only applicable to those born with a need to correct their genitals as best they can, while most transgender people desire to keep their original genitalia. A person is born with transsexualism, the whole idea of the surgery is to stop having transsexualism and to get on with life as if they never had the condition. For me and many of my old friends it was important to fix our mind and body mismatch ASAP and then get on with our lives. Often going stealth and only letting those who need to know about our past know. The term transgender covers a wide spectrum of different folks. Most of whom are more vocal/visible. Hence more well known by the public online and offline as they tend to go out of their way to make their presence known and felt. Whereas many of us old school transsexual's the aim was to fix the issue and move on with our lives unnoticed. Many of us had to make big sacrifices like losing family members and old friends and moving to avoid publicity at times. As that for us would defeat the whole object of fixing the issues we had with ourselves in the 1st place. For us it is not a badge we wear. Just a distant unhappy memory we rather leave behind us and not dwell on. This leads to our side of the story being less heard by the public, leaving them to assume the outspoken ones most often seen kicking off on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram & KZfaq etc are what its all about for all under the umbrella term transgender. Which is not the case at all. There are many of us out there in the world that can hold conversations with folk who disagree with us without resorting to branding them transphobic or getting catty and bitchy. It's a shame so many of these outspoken trans folks will brand someone transphobic at the drop of a hat yet forget it took themselves years to understand and accept their own situation. Bit hypocritical if you ask me. But hey that's what happens when what it is to be transsexual gets hijacked and turned into a trans radical agenda/movement. It's now become a money spinner for many. It's like reality TV with a large helping of soap opera thrown in for good measure. Fed to an ever growing gullible audience grasping at straws. They have only gotten away with it for so long because transsexuals tend to avoid outing themselves as it defeats the object of fixing the mind and body mismatch in the 1st place if you're going to and broadcast that you did it. I'm older now and my husband has passed away. I have nothing to lose and someone needs to speak up for the genuine transsexuals and point out the difference that the transgender agenda has tried to blur. I did my SRS in the beginning of the1980s then I just got on with my life with my late husband after my surgery. So was quite shocked when after my husband sudden death 31 years later and I went searching for a Post-op Transsexual widows support group and only found the embarrassing radical transgender agenda movement crap online that only serves to make a mockery of what it is to be Transsexual and trample all over women right as if they don't even matter. Many of today's trans folk are a breed unto themselves who lack empathy for women and women's rights. I find all this shameful, embarrassing and hurtful. My advice to anyone who is planning to come out as trans, is to invest in some big girl knickers 1st and stop trampling all over women's rights. On a side note I was amongst one of the 1st to be legally allowed to apply from my gender recognition certificate. As it was offered to those of us who were over 7 year Post-Op or longer 1st to clear the backlog of those of us who had been waiting decades for that day to come. I looked into it and decided I did not need to get mine. Since then the requirements needed to apply for the gender recognition certificate have changed drastically to include non-op so basically anyone who decided they wish to identify as female. So for me it's now not even worth the paper it's printed on and is demeaning of all I suffered growing up in the 60s 70s & 80s to be happy within my own skin. Of course women have reasons to be concerned about this. Even I do not feel safe around many of today's folks claiming to be trans. It covers such a wide spectrum of weird and wonderful people, many of whom do not have women's best interests at heart.

This was so impressive! Kobe--like all the detransitioners who've spoken out, female & male--is incredibly strong & brave. I get counted among the "rad fems," and I find it appalling that my "colleagues" don't value male detranistioners. We aren't all like that. I do hope I meet Kobe at some point. Lunch is on me!

Thank you, Ben, for doing this important work; and thank you, Kobe, for telling your story.

Yes there are many of us. I'm detrans too, started black market hormones at 17 back in 1998, stopped around a year later because I had zero libido and wanted my sex drive back, it was a different time, back then they said around one third stops during real life test and goes back

Kobe, you are right, men don't feel like a man, we just are men.

Kobe's voice sounds like a normal male voice to me. Both male and female voices vary within their own categories. I don't think 18 is old enough to be regarded as adult for the purpose of consenting to such procedures. The minimum age should be 25, when the prefrontal cerebral cortex becomes adult.

Dear Ben, always, always excellent. My heart goes out to you Kobe. Good to hear your story. Please know that so many people support you. Love and love Michele xxx

What a beautiful conversation. Thank you SO much, Kobe and Benjamin! ❤❤❤

Kobe I am so sorry that everyone failed to protect you from this dangerous ideology. But I am so happy for you that you are now living the life you were born to live. God bless you and best wishes for your future!

Oh Kobe 😢 I saw your post on twitter and got incredibly angry with the comments from both sides, I was tweeting responses to these idiots for ages 😂 It breaks my heart to know that there was no one there to tell you you're perfect just the way you are and to care for you. As a mum this just feels so wrong.

What a lovely young man and so honest and forthright. Another great interview Benjamin.

I find myself wanting to give Kobe a hug. Dude seems like such a kind soul, with a good sense of humor. I wish him peace and happiness living best life going forward.

Keep your teddy bears! Embrace all your ‘non-conformity’! Be the beautiful man you are! Love to you Kobe.

😢 I’m so sorry for this human being…the people who did this to him should be prosecuted! I hope you get all the support you need to heal as best you can ❤

Speaking out to save others from going through pain needlessly is a courageous act of responsibility Kobe. You are demonstrating the very best of a masculine protector role and can be proud of who you are and what you are doing.

So many prayers and good wishes going out to Kobe. I so hope that he finds himself, his path, and most of all love.

"you need to preserve this" you need to preserve this so that you'll be a s'x object to someone who gets off on young boys. let's face it, that was the intention of those groomers saying it. (PS. Kobe, you are a very brave young man! You went through a lot, and you were too young to make these decisions, and it's not on you; hope all the best for your healing, you're a smart and insightful man!)

Hearing about your teen years being isolated and spent being in this ideology hurts my heart. I just wanna give you a big ol hug ❤

I have nothing but respect and love for Kobe. The s*it he's been through. The "pluck" to go his own way! His navigation through the sleezyist of human behaviors deserves the utmost respect.

what I realize with this trend is how you literally can make human do anything even if it harms themselves severely, as long as you condition them to think like they want it. Conditioning is the key. Whoever push this movement knows this very well. They exploit human weakest side

It was so rough to listen to this… Especially with my 2 little ones sleeping next door… I’m so sorry for this young man. I sure hope he finds ways to live an honest, meaningful life. 😔🙏

I'm so sorry they did this to you, Kobe. You deserve better.

This guy is the best! Such a delightful person. Kobe, be you and find your meaning in life.

First time to comment Benjamin - excellent material cropping up on your Channel. With regards Kobe, harrowing, truly harrowing stuff. My heart bleeds for this brave young man, how he copes with his 'new' found reality must be congratulated. Do thank Kobe for speaking out, I hope and hope it saves at least one soul going down a similar, incorrect path. Please, please, please more people speak up, we have love and support for you by the bucket load. Do not be shamed or silenced, your voice really does count in a world literally gone mad.

Kobe you are just so impressive. I am a straight tomboy who thankfully grew up before any of this insanity. I know this is the beginning of your new start and i just want to say not only do you look and sound like a man but it's your command presence that will propel you through life and is why you will be successful and yes, happy. The soul is so much more than the way we look or the image we idolize and yours is beautiful. Your plan to start hitting the gym is the absolute best thing you could do and i think you'll only feel better and better. Thank you for sharing your story with the world and for helping others. ❤

Thank you for reaching out to other young people ❤

My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for what happened to you. I hope you speaking out prevents the harm and helps other people. You may feel stunted but you sound very wise.

One of the most striking things about many detransitioners is how intelligent and sensitive they are. Most of this misadventure could be avoided if society/parents etc could deeply love all kids, no matter what their presentation. I feel devastated for this young man…or maybe angry… both

This is one of the most important de-transition stories I’ve heard. I’m happy to hear Kobe figured it out and wants so much more with his life. I wish him all the best on his journey and urge him to continue to speak up.

A very lovely, thoughtful, well spoken man. I hope he can find his place and be well soon. I feel very touched by this interview, somehow.

This is the saddest story I have heard so far and I've listened to many! My heart goes out to you Kobe - keep speaking out so that other children can be saved from the mutilation that is dressed up to look like life saving health care! Your value as a person is so much more than what others think of you! Speaking out like you are is going to help so many others! May God show you His love and the value He sees in you!

GOOD FOR YOU!!!! KEEP IT UP!!!! Sounds like you’ve come such a long way in such a short time. So so happy to hear how well you sound today versus the ‘before’. So frustrating g to imagine the doctors and others who ultimately push folks down this road. But keep it up!!!! YOU GOT THIS!!!!!

Love seeing you on Benjamin’s show Kobe!

Kobe, my heart breaks for the pain you have endured. For every one shit bag who comes your way, three good and loving people will bless your life. You have a bright future ahead of you. Xo

One of the most striking things about many detransitioners is how intelligent and sensitive they are. Most of this misadventure could be avoided if society/parents etc could deeply love all kids, no matter what their presentation.

I was the music director for a high school musical. There was this one lone guy who sat with the girls but was ignored by the guys. I could imagine that this guy longed for a healthy hug from a male father figure.

Thank you, Kobe. And Im sorry this happened to you.

God bless you Kobe. Sending you much love ❤️

Kobe seems so sweet! I hope he has an easier time and focus to find himself these coming years. I can't wait till the next interview to hear about his improvements 💖✨

What an all around great guy - thank you for telling your story, it's so very important for ppl to hear. Best of luck to you!

Thank you for sharing your story, Kobe. You were stunted but you DO have time to sort this young adult personhood thing out, most boys don’t even *begin* to become adult men until about 30 🖤🖤

I'm proud of you for speaking out!

Benjamin, the arc of your career has made people like Kobe willing to open up to you; please continue follow it. Though Kobe feels like he could do anything, it's important to understand that none of us can do things (well) that we have no talent for, and that's just fine. Since the 1970s, we have been fed the idea that there are no limits, and that was never good for us; one result of this kind of post-modernism is we blithely believe that feeling trumps biology, and look where that has taken us.

Thank u Kobe. Great interview 👍

I wish he could speak in schools. Kids dont understand that they will be stunted physically forever, and in pain.

Wow. Just wow. Kobe, thanks for telling your important story. I believe you have a bright future having turned the ship around and getting back on course, but it will take some time to resolve all that you have experienced!

Wow! This man has to get a book deal! The way he reflected on hi story, his naration, I couldn't stop listening (and I started the podcast to get to sleep). @Kobe: You're such an impressing man with great potential just by being you.

I found this interview to be so incredibly poignant. Thank you Kobe for being so vulnerable and honest. Your intelligence and bravery shine through. I hope you will continue to use your powerful voice to bravely speak out against what has been done to you in the name of healthcare. Thank you Benjamin for giving Kobe this platform.

Thank you Kobe for sharing your story. All the best for your future.

This is an important story for people to hear. Thanks to both Kobe and Benjamin for doing this interview. I think Kobe's documenting his experience on his own KZfaq channel will help a lot of people, too. Kobe, I wish you all the best. Whatever you have lost, there is so much meaning still to find in life. It's up to you to find yours and build on it. Focus on that and your life will be great. ❤

It's really disturbing to see kids who are less than 10 years younger than me but totally raised online using all of these new and strange terms to describe themselves. This hyper categorization can not be a healthy or natural way to develop and grow, by boxing yourself in at a time when you're changing so much physically, emotionally, psychologically. And constantly asking "who am I, what am I", making you even more self-conscious than young people already are. Really troubling.

Appreciating the attention to detail and accuracy in the title.

Thanks for sharing your experience.

Thank you both for this podcast! More young ppl need to know this journey is not all its cracked up to be, and that they're not alone!🎉❤

Always good to see someone who's gone through adversity in life laugh, and really laugh. Remember that feeling whenever you're down, Kobe, you will have down times in life, only you can remember what it feels like to be happy and only you can bring that feeling back. The first step of any depression is to realize you're entering it, and the second thing to do is think of the great things that make you happy and go do them, force yourself to do them. If you love playing music, or walking, or biking, or working out, go do it when you see you're headed down. It's hard to stay down when your doing something you love.

Kobe thank you so much for sharing your story. Your voice is so important. Please keep sharing. I would lovevto follow you on you tube.

Awe...if Kobe had just had a well-adjusted, flamboyant gay mentor to let him know all the high-school crap was temporary and that being gay was perfectly fine

Wouldn’t it make sense to prohibit medical transition for people under 25 on grounds that they cannot give informed consent? After that, if people want these cosmetic surgeries, they can pay for them, as people do for all other cosmetic procedures. That would change everything. Then we could concentrate on meaningful mental health care for distressed individuals and social support for gay and autistic kids.

Thank you, so enlightening , so valuable ❤

Omg Kobe thank you for speaking out, you are going to find that love that makes you love yourself! I promise you're so young, your life isn't THIS and doesn't have to be defined by it, but every obstacle we go through is beautiful. Turn your deep deep pain into something that expresses yourself as an extension. You speak really well, I'd love to read what you have to say!

That was dark when Kobe talks about waking up from surgery and your body not knowing what’s going on, all the best mate

Raised ON the internet is fine. It's raised BY the internet you've got to watch out for.

Wow, what an extraordinary young man! You are so brave, smart and clear minded. You are an inspiration and I wish you all the best in the world.

Kobe, thanks for sharing your story. It was very difficult to listen to, but we need to hear your side of things. Hope it all works out for you.

Thanks B & K. Kobe I‘m sorry you had to go through all that crap to realize you‘re a man, that you have always been male and always will be no matter what. I hope your health can improve and that you can enjoy living as the man you are. Best wishes for your life as a man:) Thank you for sharing your experiences! I bet that wasn‘t easy. I can tell you‘re not extroverted, not used to talk about yourself but you did really well! Don‘t let anyone tell or even convince you that you‘re ugly!!! You‘re nowhere near ugly! You‘re a beautiful young a little feminine looking man. Nothing wrong at all with that! Don’t ever think you should be appreciative of the company of men who don’t see and appreciate you as the whole complex being you are. Don’t let them use you as an object, please!! We are the most beautiful when we are ok with ourselves, when we don‘t try to become sth we are not! Then also the chance to devalue yourself gets smaller bc you learn a lot about yourself and who you are instead of „what you should be like to attract someone“. You’ll attract ppl who mean well, who like you and not an image they have of you! I just hope your pain will reduce with time and that your body can heal some of the damage! Don‘t give in, human bodies are capable of a lot. I understand yours suffered severe damage and it‘s a crime what was done to you! I hope you can enjoy small steps of improvement and one day look back and see that you got better than you had imagined. Maybe my words sound like I have no idea of what you endure and yes, I don‘t know. I know though that healing is a complex process consisting of many little pieces and steps and a lot of time. But on that path there‘s still a lot to discover. Even some negative experiences can help to recognize sth and go from there to take a certain way with the new gained knowledge& realization. Thanks once again! I think you help others w speaking out! Don‘t feel obliged to but if it feels right to go on speaking, your experiences are of huge value & i hope many will listen and take a step back when they are about to rush to transition… Take care Kobe!

Really appreciate his candor. I have high hopes for this one. Would love an update on him in a few years.

Thank you, Kobe. And thank you, Ben, for mentioning your takeaways from the worship service at the church. “If you don’t worship something outside the world, you will worship the strongest thing in the world.” G K Chesterton.

Thank you for sharing your experience.

I wish all the best to you, Kobe! It’s unconscionable what you’ve been through. The fact that you’re speaking out about this will help other kids in your position and hopefully will help you find meaning in the world that failed you.

Excellent interview; to the point but gentile, this young man has been through some terrible trauma. I pray he finds the peace and love his yearns for and he deserves

These kids are so intelligent it’s hard to believe how they fell through that trap…

Thank you for sharing. I'm sorry you "slipped through the cracks ".

This person is very well spoken and intelligent! I encourage a public life as an influencer. The awesome style is also a plus

Kobe you are so strong and thank you for speaking out. I wish you all the happiness.

Kobe, I think you are amazing, having shared your story, struggles physically and emotionally. I am sure you are helping those who truly are not trans. Be proud of yourself, you are strong!

18:30 I think that is a really important thing Kobe pointed out. Not having something to keep yourself grounded in, even just a hobby, can be a big force in leading you down a bad path. There's a lots of other factors that led to his transition, like the social ostracization and isolation, but I think having hobbies and interests is a big one. I truly wish him the best.

You are a courageous, strong young man, Kobe. Your honest sharing of your experience will definitely be of help. You are impressive, very mature for your years. And, btw, your voice is plenty masculine, try to let go of the self-consciousness (that gets much easier as the years go by, I'd say one of the greatest gifts of age). You definitely make a more attractive man than women.

Wow ❤️ Kobe is incredibly intelligent & well spoken! I just know he's going to help SO many people. You can see the compassion in his eyes. His drive to save even one person from what he went through is remarkable. Kobe, if you read my comment please know that you have a great future ahead of you & that I'm praying for you 🙏 I'm sorry this happened to you but you are good enough & worthy of happiness & respect. What an absolute sweetheart 🥰 I'd love to follow your KZfaq channel if you go that route & I absolutely think you should!!

Kobe, thousands of people you have never met are praying for you and thanking you and wishing for the very best for you. Bravo you. May God bless and protect and inspire you. And may you be open to God's love.

Kobe is so honest. Thank you.

Great interview. Recovering males, as Kobe also corrects as, may have much in common to tell us and those are very important information because they are common; however each of them speaking out adds their unique contributions which are very valuable as such. Best wishes for Kobe throughout his recovery and life journey!

Thank you Kobe, you are a brave intelligent lovely young man, I'm sorry about what those butchers did to you, your story will help and stop many from the same fate, God bless you

Koby, Thank you so much for sharing your story. Your honesty and bravery was inspiring to hear. I know this interview was from almost a year ago, so if you're still reading these I hope that the future is now treating you well. You answered so many questions I've had about people in your situation. I'm an older straight guy who has a gay brother and have had many gay male friends throughout my life. Back when I was your age I didn't know anyone that was trans, but I sure did know a lot of very femme gay men. Despite our inherent differences, I always considered my gay friends (no matter how sassy and fem) to be at the end of the day - still one of my dude friends. What I've noticed about recent times is that as a straight dude I really don't know how to act/socialize with trans women. I know in my gut they are men, but what they and current culture says is that I should treat them as I would a woman. It is difficult, as I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or hurt their feelings. I'm so sorry for what the medical grifters have put you through. Just because you don't have certain anatomical parts anymore, you are still in every way a man. I hope that time has healed and that you will one day be able to not feel pain when you should feel pleasure. I'm rooting for you.

7:13 "you weren't a threat to the women until you became competition" I think your interpretation of the girls' behavior is entirely wrong. He said that his girl's group got "weird" after his transition. That's not about competition, it's about authenticity. When he was free to be himself, and express himself the way he wanted to, it was comfortable for the girls to be his friend. When he pursued external means and a created persona (ideating as female) then the girls felt "weird" around him because they didn't know how to interact with the mirage. Especially a mirage they are required to validate as "really real." (The way you leaped to an interpretation of females "competing" for males, says more about you than about your guest.)

Wait, Benjamin - you're 47?? What's your secret? Inquiring minds wish to know! *calmversation skincare routine video incoming please*

Yes. "Leave the kids out of it."❤

Great interview, thank you for speaking out Kobe. Your story is illuminating. I have been involved in the trans debate for many years and had never heard some of these things . A friend’s stepson (with serious mental health issues) in his early 20’s underwent genital SRS a couple years ago and he committed suicide a year later, I can’t help but think he experienced some of the same medication side effects you did. Such a travesty and criminal. I wish you the best in your future life endeavors. People need to hear what you have to say.

Nice guy. Best wishes for the future.

I am happy you have this self-realization about yourself Kobe. Good on you for getting yourself together.

Kobe is so articulate, I hope he feels respect in the society as much as the viewers have for him. And also well done to Benjamin Boyce for engaging so well. Maybe I have missed bits of the interview - were there bits about Kobe's parents/caregivers? Where did they play in all this and how did they engage with his transition/detrans?