It's horrible when you wanna talk to somebody and no one takes you seriously

Sadness is an emotion, Depression is a state of mind. You can be happy yet still suffer from depression.

My friend sent me a text message about 10 years ago. He wanted to hang out. So we went shopping just for fun. He paid me a bunch of stuff, food clothes etc. He wa smiling and happy. At first. He was " normal " but the same day at night he sent me a message saying that he loves me and he was very happy to be my friend and that he was sorry for what he was about to do. I knew something was not good. So a jumped in my car, i was riding so fast that I don't even know how I didn't crashed. I broke into his home and he was cuting his wrists. I saved him. He was very mad. He never said thank you and i never asked for. But now he has a daughter and everytime I go visit them he always says to his daughter "look that's my best friend the one who saved my life so many times"

Wanting to die, but being unable to fully go through with it because you know how it'll destroy those around you, is awful. Suffering life so others dont have to suffer without me is me living in my own personal hell.

My father always said… “Life isn’t fun without a struggle in it, but some struggles lead to tragic endings.”

"i don't want to be healed. i have a strong urge and desire to just disappear and never be seen again. and at this point, pain is sweet." yes, there are people who feel this way

"Thousands of geniuses live & die undiscovered either by themselves or by others" - Mark Twain

They always say to reach out to others. But they don’t mention that the people you reach out to will always think of you as crazy from there on.

By the time you're suicidal, you've already learnt how to put up a mask and stuff. That's how it's so difficult to tell if someone is suicidal or not.

People might misunderstand and think those weren’t genuine moments of joy but they very well could have been. You can be suicidal and still have happy moments.

I think a lot of people don't realize that living with depression isn't "just a phase" and a lot of time, it doesn't just "go away." A lot of people learn to mask it or learn to harness it. Having it doesn't mean 24/7 sulking and LOOKING depressed all the time. As a person who deals with major depressional issues myself, seeing this gets me a different type of way. These people search for joy in the tiniest things, and they could find it for a brief moment, but the depression still lingers

I always happen to come back to this exact video whenever I reach my lowest points. I just want to disappear. I’m so tired of fighting alone, I’m tired of having to fake every bit of my happiness. I hate this world. It’s a horrible place to be in. If I feel like this now at 16, I can only imagine how miserable I’ll be when I hit adulthood.

My mom , she's the reason I still wake up everyday . I can't imagine the pain it'll cause her . For her I'll endure this

If you see a depressed person unexpectedly happy, something is not right

I’m so miserable. I can’t even wake up without feeling hopeless. I don’t know what to do anymore. Therapy gets me no where. Prayer gets me no where. I’m so sick of feeling empty all the time.

People who have never been through it will never understand these feelings

What people often don’t understand about suicide is that when someone has been depressed for a very long time and they finally make the decision, they finally start to feel peace and calmness because they know that the pain and suffering will end, so if you know someone who has been under the weather for a very long time and all of a sudden one day they’re in a really good mood, that’s not just a sign, that’s a whole siren because that probably means the decision has been made Edit: the amount of stories in the replies about how you guys had loved ones that committed suicide is heartbreaking, I am so sorry to all of you that have experienced such horrible losses and to all the people who have taken their own lives, may you at least Rest In Peace

_All it takes is a beautiful fake smile to hide an injured soul and they will never notice how broken you really are._ - Robin Williams

Let's be real no one really cares until its too late. Its easier to bring flowers to a funeral then help someone. Sad world we live in.

I tried to take mine. I remember everyone around either called me weak, or my personal favorite, selfish. It's been about 20 years now, married with 3 kids. The thought still pops up now and then. For no reason. The idea of the peace that comes with it. That it can finally be over. But my kids bring me back. Or at least the fear of where will they be if I leave them. A few years into the marriage I told my wife. She called me selfish too. That was a blow. I understand what they mean. But it would be nice if they also tried to comprehend me.

Robin Williams is a pure example of how you can make others happy but be horribly depressed

Been depressed/suicidal for a long, long time (20+ years). Only thing stopping me is knowing that it would destroy my loved ones. I could never do it.

Its awful that you dont even have someone to save you from suicidal thoughts by just listening, i feel like im close to the end

The topic of suicide is something that will always make me cry. They just didn’t deserve it

“People don’t commit suicide because they want to die, they just want the pain to end” -A quote by someone I found on another suicide related video.

people who are suicidal often feel trapped, so having suicide as an “option” brings a sense of comfort. that’s why many people seem to be suddenly really happy the day/s before their suicide/attempt.

One of my classmates acted similar to this before she unalived herself. I was one of the last to see her alive and I wish I had done something. I still remember her face all these years.

One day My friend asked me how you will react when i ll die and jokingly i said it doesn’t really matters to me then we went to dominoes having my favourite pizza then he took me to mall bought me some costly stuff and while dropping me to my home he said me “ you are the best guy i ever meet in my life my friend i ll miss you “ i was moron didn’t understood last words and next day he hanged himself still missing him.

It’s insane how much pain can be hidden behind something as simple as a smile

The thing with suicide is, as soon as someone says they want to end their own life wether it be in a moment of depression, a moment of stress or even in a moment of emotional exhaustion, that statement should tell you that you need to stand by that person and keep them going, no matter what the context, always take the threat seriously.

When you’re suicidal and nobody knows and they keep hurting you over and over again🙂💔

It's almost funny how it first came as a joke, then progressed into something like "i dont need to pay my bills or care about myself" I can just jump in front of a train when it gets too fucked. Or atleast thats what i tell myself to not feel overwhelmed with my thoughts and anxiety everyday.

The "These are the last videos of people who took their own lives" hits harder than you think

My brother started to play video games all day long for the last 6 months before he took his own life and he was always playing the same game. One day when I asked him " are you not bored doing the same thing over and over again?" He said "it's not that I'm enjoying this but at least I'm not self aware when I'm doing this" he was crippled in a car accident and couldn't accept living a life he never thought he would. I miss him so much

This brought a tear to my eye, depression is a thing i have battled for years, you put on a brave face around your friends and family, pretend everything is ok, but in reality you're broken and you can't handle everyday life.. RIP to all the people in this video 🙏😢

The last few days before my dad took his own life, he appeared so happy. He smiled, laughed, played with us, took us out to more restaurants and then suddenly he was just gone.

Hearing my son confess his level of depression to me hit like a ton of bricks. He always seemed so happy. He confessed having bad thoughts. I went from not wanting to bother my adult child by calling and stopping by to see him to now calling him multiple times a day and doing things together. We have dinner once a week on Sundays now. We both realized how hard life was for each other and are making a commitment to be there for each other like never before. Him and my daughter are my whole world. When they became adults and moved out i was crushed. I am dealing with it better now. One day at a time. We need more open discussions when it comes to mental health and depression. I felt so alone. I know I'm not. Thank you to everyone for the kind words. Reading through replies made me both happy and sad at same time. This life sure can be hard sometimes. My son lost a good friend a few days ago to suicide. A friend he has had for many years. A friend he had no idea was having such a hard time with life. Be kind to everyone. You don't know what thoughts are running through their heads.

I'm sorry Jeremy. And I'm sorry to anyone reading this who's struggling. You might not care to hear it from me, but I'm proud of you for still being here, and I believe with every part of me that it will get better.

just don’t want to live anymore

In 2012, I attempted to take my own life. I briefly left this world, and a team of paramedics determined to bring me back. I am now ten years into an EMS career, three of those years as a paramedic. Two strangers cared about me not because it was their job, but because I didn't deserve to die. So take it from me, a stranger, you don't deserve that either. I don't have to know you to say I care about you, and I need you here on this planet with me for a while longer.

Lost my best mate to suicide 24 years ago when we were both 23. Had no idea he was struggling, not always easy to spot the signs if they’re not there. Funniest bloke I knew and we were out together the night he found the courage to do what I guess he felt he had to do. Rest easy Dean Kerry. I miss you and wish I could’ve helped.

At least they made somebody they loved happy.. my brother just died at his 40th birthday... No idea whats better, love you all

Some people put on a cheerful front so as not to burden others. I do it. Good luck to all those fighting the invisible conditions like depression. You aren’t alone. 🖤

I've always liked this quote "People don't want to die they just want to start living "

This hit me right in the chest. I know exactly how these beautiful people were feeling and I struggle everyday. We need to talk more 🖤

Lost my friend to suicide a bit over 7 years ago in high school and this is exactly how she was when I knew her. On the outside. I ever since promised myself to always always always try to talk and help someone in that position. Whoever this person is looks like a great person❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ rest in peace. rest in peace as well best friend

“Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.” - Brad Meltzer

What I find very sad about suicide is how a lot of people become really happy right before they do it. It's like they have already died and are just waiting to pass over. The sadness completely leaves them once they decide to do it, because they now feel empowered and feel like they now have control on when the pain ends. I've just always found that to be the most troubling is that bout of happiness right before they kill themselves. The people that have quietly been worrying about the person sees this happiness and is relieved that thier loved one finally seems to be coming out of their depression, but is then hit with the earth shattering suicide. It's like how a person that is dying in the hospice seems to come alive and are full of energy right before they die. They'll be in a coma state and suddenly wake up and start talking to everyone in an alert and excited manner and then falls over dead. Life is strange as is death.

Please, anyone out there. I see you. Do not let depression or any mental health condition lie to you. That is what it wants. You are beautiful in every way, you are worth it more than you know, and you will ALWAYS be stronger than any challenges you face. Never give up. I know it can be hard, but life is not going to mess with a badass person who is full of resiliency and perseverance such as yourself. You are NEVER alone. I love you. I really do. Sending you a gentle loving hug.🩷.

It's sad to see the little infants are so happy playing with loved ones, but they did'nt know its may the last time.

you can fake a smile, but you can't fake sad eyes

It's important to know that you can't _always_ help. I was in a place like that many years ago and I made sure nobody could tell. One day I thought of a reason that I couldn't do it and that was the end. Nobody ever knew.

The few times I’ve told someone I wanted to die , they said I was being manipulative. I just keep my feelings to myself now because I know nobody cares anyway . I feel worthless and alone . I literally pray to to leave this place daily .

I've been depressed I think since 12... I've spent my whole life thinking I was "fine" when I was really so dead inside.

Oftentimes people say "I wish I saw the signs"/"why did no one see the signs" but often underestimate just how good people can mask their pain, there's some people you'd never in a million years suspect anything was wrong with until it's too late. It's so tragic and a reminder that mental health seriously needs more focus and the help needs to be more accessible because being in that headspace is something I'd wish on no one. This video is so heartbreaking seeing all these people smiling and happy knowing that they were in so much pain. I hope they're happy now. ❤️

In high school, my best friend popped into my job on a Saturday just to hang out for a bit. It was a little unexpected but there were no red flags. He killed himself on Sunday night. I still have his picture in my wallet more than a decade later because he's the only reason I've never hurt myself regardless of how I'm feeling; the pain it inflicts on others is not worth it. I miss you so much man. Edit: Thank you for the supportive comments, and I'm so sorry for those who have gone through similar situations. To those who doubt me, I wish it wasn't true. To those saying I should have done more, I hope you get help.

Not matter how much they laugh , eyes don't lie😢

I really hope I'd be able to watch this video again, have truly hit the rock bottom in my life

I remember talking to my mom about feeling suicidal. She made the conversation about herself and complained about my father. She wound up crying about her own problems and I ended up comforting her. Gotta love being raised by a narcissist.

Sending my condolences. It's not easy. Depression, anxiety, disorders. They're real 🥺💜

I don't know these people yet I feel so sad they're not with us today... wherever they may be now, I hope these good souls are in a happier place.

Watching this helps. I too, watch it when I’m at my worst lows. It gets awfully hard to live. Only cause you don’t want to hurt others around you. Dear thanks to whoever posted this. I cry every single time. I work construction and I’m on my lunch break. I look over my shoulders to make sure nobody sees my tears. The Bible says god counts your tears. Dear lord I hope that is true.

Sometimes some people with depression just enjoy the present because they know there is no future for them.

My sister just took her own life. It's been three days. I feel numb. I wish I could have talked to her one last time. It's heartbreaking.

I understand every person who has ever toyed with the idea. Life is often not worth living...

Imagine wanting to live but being forced to die. Now imagine wanting to die but being forced to live.

I sometimes wish I had no loved ones, because I feel trapped. I hate living like this, but I can’t leave and hurt my family, friends and partner.

It's hard because most of us didn't choose to feel damaged. We had that stripped from us through unsolicited life experiences. You grow into an adult expecting to be able to carry all that weight and the weight of others. Sometimes that weight feels too much. I say this as someone who has dealt with suicidal ideation since I was 8 due to trauma. Not a day goes by that I don't wish it would stop. But I love life truly and try to make the best of it. I fully understand when others have had enough and I don't judge them. But unless you've felt like this I don't quite think you get it. When there's certain days if you just didn't wake up you could ignore the pain. That's the sad reward for death.

literally just tonight, 6 hours ago my older brother committed. He never told us anything, he seemed okay. But he left his items, and police came back to us telling us what had happened. Please, check on anyone even if they seem okay. I miss him and I last saw him before he left the house.

Depressed people like myself often try to convince ourselves we are happy/having a good time in order to come out of depression. My mother always says to me to try and not think about being depressed and just try to enjoy the moment. And thats what leads to this I believe, they are looking happy. Its hard to get rid of depression it comes sneaking up on you sometimes for no reason at all.

Gonna be honest with you rn, this video had me crying. I lost my mom to suicide 2 years ago and I remember the last time I saw her she was so happy to get remarried and I was happy for her. I remember standing in the kitchen with her as she pulled out a t shirt that said "Future Ms (his last name)" and I thought about how I was going to have both parents in my life. I didn't care he wasn't my biological father, he still loved me just the same and wanted to adopt me and my siblings. I cry all the time thinking about how I never spent a lot of time with her. It hurts me looking at her pictures knowing this is how it all ended. I remember my life shattering the night we got the call she was in the ICU from her attempt. She passed away days later. I'll never forget the pain I felt when they told us she was brain dead. Knowing she was slipping away right from under us. Knowing I'll never see my mom again. Knowing I took it all for granted. I took having a mother for granted and I kick myself in the ass everyday because of it. I remember the last thing I said to her when she was in a coma. Before they took her off life support... "I'll see you soon". I had every intention of taking my life weeks after all was said and done. But I didn't. And I'm glad I didn't. It still hurts carrying on, but I'm stronger than I used to be. My last attempt was October of last year. And I plan to keep it that way. Because I'm going to keep fighting. Even when it hurts.... Edit: I'm on new medications and I'm feeling so much better. I look back on this comment because this was at my worst. I'm a year free from self harm and replaced bad coping skills with better ones, such as tattoos and piercings. It's boosted my confidence so much and I never looked back. I can confidently say I'm doing much better and I plan to get married to my fiance very soon. He's been there at my worst and now at my best. My heart goes out to everyone who's lost a relative or good friend to suicide. It's definitely not easy, but you will get thru this! It's taken 3 years to heal and recover from my past. I did some stupid stuff in order to cope, but I'm glad it's not something that follows me to this day. You are loved and very much wanted in this world even if you don't believe it. I have the best dog and fiance in the world that keeps me going! It may not be much, but I'm get grateful for them both! I still fight and keep fighting for a better life than I was given. Even if it hurts, I still get up and keep going! If you're in America, the new suicide hotline number is 988. It really works and someone will be there to help you with whatever you're going thru!

Had a student commit suicide. Leafing up to the time, she seemed happy and calm because she had already decided what she was going to do. So the last week was one of relief for her. Afterward, we were all, of course in shock. This was 19 years ago. I have not gotten over it. I know her family and classmates will forever be affected by our loss.

The lad with his son laughing seriously haunts me, so sad 😢

as if you're in a game but there's no exit button, it feels like every minute is a challenge, it's like a very slow death, i have been planning my escape but looking at my daughter is the only thing that keeps me from leaving

I've called the hotline nine times. Told family about it. Finally after three years and six months of extreme gratitude focus (I've said thank you probably ten thousand times... literally...), I pulled myself out of it. I'm one of these smiley people myself, and yeah, I get what these people were feeling.

You know what, as I get older, I realize how miserable and difficult living is. It’s a rarity someone makes it to the natural end in one piece both physically and mentally. Have fun everyone. Be safe.

It's the thoughtfulness that makes it so hard to bear, so we act like we don't care...

I feel so guilty ngl like ive been suicidal for a long time and have managed to fight it thankfully yet everytime i tell people i get called ungrateful as people who want to live get taken away. To anyone whos lost anyone due to suicide my thoughts are with you and im sorry

Also, to those who think that suicide is selfish; I cannot forget that reddit thread on suicide where one guy was saying that he keeps deferring suicide, not because that he was hopeful that his life may change, but because he had some loans and his parents were cosigning parties, so he said he was working as hard as he could to pay back those loans first as he didn't want to leave his parents both grieving and in debt...... there are ones who defer suicide because they don't want to harm their families, or because they need to continue their roles as caregivers while, deep down, they are dying.

What breaks my heart is that in some of them, you can see it that they're tired. Not a physical tired but they're tired. And it breaks me knowing that I can't do anything about what happened to them. They had fun with their families or friends because they knew that they wouldn't ever again. The guy with the ice cream, you could see a little frown on his face, and it ruined me because I could tell he was either just trying to have a good time or trying to make the people around him smile one more time.

It’s not gonna be much longer. I understand you guys. I’ll be there soon

Man, I just feel like I can’t do it anymore either

My neighbor was one of people who you would never expect. Always had this amazing smile on his face. We will never forget you Stanton.

As someone who attempted four times, the state where you finally decided to do it is scary. First, you become blank. Then, you plan when and how. After that, you wait and then act normal. Basically the mindset is "I'm gonna die soon, so I'll make the best out of my remaining hours."

Tbh, i’m almost there too. But it’s just life i guess. The pain you, the pain you feel inside is just soooo painful i just can’t describe it. Saddest part is that people like this always life a sad lonely life and get forgotten about because most of us are “nobodies” who come from a sad background. Man oh man life can be cruel. And btw, please spare me your positive replies because i won’t respond to it

Society just destroys people’s spirit and makes them feel hopeless. Rip to all the people in the video. Also, if someone dares say they are suicidal, the “help” they get is being forced into a mental hospital against their will with people who don’t give a fuck about them. Society is just so selfish.

Having severe depression/anxiety is like being terrified and exhausted at the same time. It’s the fear of failure, coupled with no urge to be productive. It’s wanting friends but hating socializing. It’s wanting to be alone but not wanting to be lonely. It’s feeling everything bad at once, yet being paralyzingly numb to anything good. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

My friend killed himself few weeks ago. We hadn't really been in touch for about a year before it and we knew each other for a short time, but man, this information left me shocked and devastated. He helped me through one of the hardest moments in my life. Since his suicide, there hasn't been a single day I wouldn't think about him. He was the purest soul ever, always eager to help others, always energetic and always cheerful. Such a beautiful, extremely young, lost person. As far as I know, the reason was bullying and it makes me fucking mad. It seems he was just an angel, too delicate for this shitty world and fucked up people. That feels bad as hell.

I have had suicidal thoughts for many years due to depression. There is no particular reason that triggers the suicidal act, but a long list of bad experiences that have slowly accumulated. When I attempted suicide I was actually both happy and empty, I knew that finally all the pain would finally go away. The problem is later, when you realize what you were about to do.

Im a two time survivor. People say im the happiest guy they have ever met, always laughing and having a good time. This is the reason Im going into the field of therapy for my career. I want to use my story to help others.

My dad died by suicide on Thanksgiving Day.It was absolutely shocking and he was always a major extrovert and the life of any party. I now understand that he showed the world one side but inside he was feeling opposite.

I lost my brother to suicide 4 years ago. It still feels like yesterday. I’m still in counseling and healing from it. Thank you for posting

Please don't abandon anyone, always support them. You never know what will happen to a person tomorrow. He can be cheerful today and commit suicide tomorrow. Please don't leave anyone in trouble. Help others cope with their suffering. Don't put pressure on them, don't laugh at them. Don't say you will leave them when you love them. Please please please! During the tough times and at other times just give them a big hug

Im so tired of been tired for so long im tired of no one caring enough to help. I know i got my self in some of these problems but im trapped im sorry i was blind i dont want to do this. I cant keep living for everyone else and my fear of letting them down. I am desperate to give up.

Everyone who made it far, thank you for staying alive

Depression is not a day by day thing, it’s an hour by hour existence 😢

When you're a therapist treating suicidal patients and inside you're like.. "yeah, i get it. I got my escape plan ready too"

I couldn’t help burst in tears. I had depression for more than 10 years. The feeling of being depressed was horrible, and I was so close to end my life😢. I’m extremely grateful that I got the right medicine and right treatment that cured me. The days with and without depression are completely different!

I was a volunteer firefighter in high school and began fighting my ptsd. I was involved with multiple successful suicides and that was a major factor. I struggled with aggression and isolation at times. One day I really got stuck in a loop of suicidal ideation, but I never acted. One hour later the same day, I responded to another attempt and saved a patients life on her living room floor. That was my call to keep serving and get help

My daughter committed suicide in 2016, My husband's granddaughter did the same a year before that Suicidal people don't want to die, they want their way of life to die, for all their problems to vanish. My daughter said in her note, Mum, I feel like I'm going on holiday.