Survival Self- Care vs Repair Self-Care - Special Topic Lecture with Irene Lyon

Рет қаралды 21,956

Күн бұрын

In this special topic lecture I talk about this concept of 'self-care' and how we humans do it, or don't do it in many cases. I cover questions like:
-Why are we so terrible at prevention and tending to our health, body, and mind (even when we know darn well we should)?
-Why do we tend to wait until we get the diagnosis, or the tumour, or the illness, etc?
-Why do we need prizes and goals to motivate us?
-Why does it not come from WITHIN?
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Here are some Questions/Topics I discuss in this chat:
0:00 - Survival Self- Care vs Repair Self-Care
5:01 - The importance of the body being able to rest (Edgar Cayce)
9:34 - Surge of stimuli to distract
11:10 - Acute survival self-care
15:06 - Why are we so bad at prevention?
18:41 - Learning about self-care as a child
19:46 - ‘Sensitive’ as a child
20:56 - Not noticing when hurt/sick
22:18 - Overriding when parenting
23:07 - Sick/Injuries for attention - Fawning
24:55 - Burnout and getting sick
29:12 - Why is motivation done by prizes, force etc…
35:33 - Re-wiring as an adult
37:31 - Praise in childhood
40:50 - What role do consequences/threats play?
42:53 - What is healthy self care as opposed to survival self care?
48:27 - How do you communicate love and respect without praise?
50:28 - Can you do this work while on anti-depressants?
51:45 - Role of diet when healing your nervous system
53:42 - Cleaning and working with shame
59:31 - Polyvagal theory
1:00:22 - Decreasing stress in life
1:02:14 - How do you move into repair self care when meeting deadlines?
1:06:01 - Behaviours
1:07:22 - Self care when you have children
1:11:51 - Feeling overwhelmed when stopping to rest
1:14:46 - No routine as a child
1:17:18 - What do you do when you have trouble focusing
1:19:25 - Feldenkrais in healing via the Nervous System
1:23:52 - Importance of micro-moments of self care throughout the day
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Resources I mention during this video:
►Irene Lyon website
irenelyon.com/
►Edgar Cayce site
www.edgarcayce.org/
►Functional Freeze Explained
• Functional Freeze Expl...
►Gabor Mate - book - When The Body Says No
drgabormate.com/book/when-the…
►Po Bronson - book - Nurture Shock
www.amazon.com/NurtureShock-N...
►21 Day Nervous System Tune Up
21daytuneup.com/
►Recovering from benzodiazepines, healing anxiety & PTSD. SBSM Success Stories
• Recovering from benzod...
►Special Topic Lecture: Shame. The Healthy Kind. The Toxic Kind.
• Special Topic Lecture:...
►Understanding the difference between healthy shame and toxic shame. Interview with Seth Lyon
• Understanding the diff...
►The Polyvagal Theory. Explained.
• The Polyvagal Theory. ...
►What the heck is orienting? (and why is it so important?!)
• What the heck is orien...
►What do you do when you have unresolved trauma? Two types of orienting
• What do you do when yo...
►Healing Trauma 3-Part Video Training
irenelyon.com/healing-trauma-...
►Free Resource Centre
irenelyon.com/free-resources-2/
►Drop In Class
irenelyon.com/drop-in-class-1
__
Thank you for being here!
1. Leave a comment and let me know how this video impacted you. Feel free to leave a question (my team answers them each week!)
2. To get more nervous system health resources, plus learn more about me and my credentials, plus the many ways you can work with me at the practical level, head to my website: irenelyon.com
3. Follow me on social here:
Instagram: / irenelyon
Facebook: / lyonirene
LinkedIn: / irenelyon
SoundCloud: / irenelyon
4. GOT QUESTIONS? Send an email to: support@irenelyon.com
Please know that...
The statements on this KZfaq channel or in videos are simply opinion. Content presented or posted on this channel is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment or a professional therapeutic relationship. Content presented or posted is intended to provide general health information for educational purposes only and you should contact the appropriate healthcare professional before relying on any such information.
My website is a wealth of information, free resources, and information on how to start this work, so here it is one more time: irenelyon.com
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Пікірлер: 92

@Glutathione4Wellness 9 ай бұрын

Sad that if we have a physical illness others feel sorry for us, send us well wishes, understand that we need to slow down. But when it is Mental Health, others don’t get it and expect you to keep functioning at full capacity.

@MySpiritualShenanigans 2 жыл бұрын

Is it just me or does anyone else also have to pause multiple times to really digest what Irene shares? This wisdom is beyond my immediate grasp most of the times haha. Thank you for your AMAZING gift and service to the world. - Commenting as I pause the replay for my 3rd time (:

@origin2387 2 жыл бұрын

Yes. This topic can be highly activating.

@deberebor 2 жыл бұрын

Yes. In fact, though the content on all these immediately rang bells for me a year ago, it has been repeated viewings of many videos that have done the trick. There is a point where the lightbulb goes ON. I think that is because at first our cognitive brain is listening to facts and maybe not relating everything to the feelings in the body. After a certain amount of viewings, my cognitive brain gets the message that my body is sending. It just takes some time. I'm probably working on these concepts while I sleep, when I am in non-verbal mode.

@Glutathione4Wellness 9 ай бұрын

I want to do a public awareness campaign telling people “ let your children be ok with feeling and sensing”

@ormorphe 2 жыл бұрын

I really appreciate this. Thank you. The author of The Resilient Empath (Jennifer Lauren Parker) referred me to your channel and I’m grateful for both of you. I would like to add something that helps physiologically: and that is making sure that our body salts and electrolytes are replenished. Emotional work uses up a lot of these anyway and most people are very deficient in the necessary body salts and electrolytes. Chronic dehydration only makes things worse and I really do think it’s the lack of replenishing body salts when people work out a lot that leads to some of them dropping dead of heart attacks at young ages. I’ve also found that using magnesium oil directly on the skin really helps with the magnesium and we need magnesium in our bodies without taxing our kidneys and our livers and doing it on the skin is the safest way to do so. (The Magnesium Miracle book and Dead Doctors Don’t Lie books help lay people to understand these aspects ). It’s so important to know that healing work especially involves electrical impulses and they cannot work properly without enough magnesium. I thought I would add that for anyone who didn’t know, because it really does make a difference. And thank you so much for all that you are doing to help all if us heal.

@sydneymomma11 Жыл бұрын

Thank you for this comment! 6 years ago I started making my own electrolyte blend and consuming it daily. I noticed my healing journey greatly accelerated, and during the 3 separate month-long periods this year when I've not been able to afford them, my pace stagnates. I've noticed I also need to increase my protein consumption and sleep as well, bc it takes a LOT of fuel for these kinds of changes to occur. Additing gentle stretching and more movement has been beneficial to move the trauma out of my body. I wish whomever reading this healing and loving energy on their own journey. May you reach your highest self. 💜

@Sunnyfield323 Жыл бұрын

Thankyou! 1000% agree

@deberebor 2 жыл бұрын

The reason that future shock is in quotes is that that was the buzz phrase of the 70s, due to a book by Alvin Toffler of the same name. In it, he described how the speed of current life was increasing to a degree that would disturb the health and happiness of people. Personal computers weren't a thing yet, but the book definitely predicts the effects of the digital age.

@bebaaskaful 2 жыл бұрын

Reapir self care still feels like Im not deserving it. I work a lot, single parent, and get owerwhelmed easaly. I had all of the toxic conditioning in my childooh, and while listening youre explanations I cry, so all is resonating with my system. I cant leave this toxic soup of living this modern society life, because I have to raise my child and dont have financies for massages or anything other then paying bills. So, all above makes a lot of stress but I do SBSM, and working and something shifts also in my behaviour. Habits are stilk there, but I cant easy change it. It is like not normal to take care of myself. I feel liyerally scared if I do something for myself. What a fuckup. But I know that it will shift

@TheSevda Жыл бұрын

How are you now? 🙏

@missfeliss3628 10 ай бұрын

ur doing a perfect job ❤❤

@davetina2205 2 жыл бұрын

I think it’s more important to re-orient people to the concept of consequences. There is no value statement except for what we have misapplied. Consequences are a result of an action or inaction - the real questions becomes ‘did I create what I was hoping for?’ Or ‘did that action help me to feel the way I want to feel?’

@junalovermine 9 ай бұрын

Internally motivated that the words I’ve been needing to have - I’ve been trying for awhile to shift this being in the arts and the whole relationship with approval and rebelling - making it happen in between the love or hate or the ‘I don’t care ‘

@thirzavandamme8302 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for sharing this video. I am still working through a lot of trauma (currently, it feels like my body is reacting quite seriously to tje opening up of many many dark layers, my skin literally hurting and crackling, migraines galore, total physical exhaustion messing up every plan). I was brought up in a toxic family, always felt the odd duck in the row so to speak, for being "too much" in tune with my body and being oversensitive. Looking at what I needed, was a huge no. Ailments nd hurts were dismissed as selfish attention-seeking behaviour, and punished by hitting me or reprimanding me in toxic ways. Achievements were all compared to my 2y younger brother and classmates. I never felt lile I was seen for ME. As a parent myself now, I truly cannot understand it. I try, with my therapist, I really try. I learn my son to be in touch with his body. I help him to be aware of both physical and emotional changes, how both translate in behaviour and mental state. And somehow, strangely, it comes NATURALLY to me. Your teachings, Irene, have taught me so much, waking up that little child with its sensitivities, eye for detail, care for the world, that was muted and nearly destroyed (lit.). I truly, really, cannot thank you enough. ♡♡

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Dear Thirza, thanks so much for this share. This is Seth with Team Lyon. I'm so sorry to hear what you went though, and also so happy to hear how hard you have worked to not pass that trauma along to your own kids. That's no easy feat! Thanks so much for being here, learning, and doing the work!

@nireeburr 11 ай бұрын

Sending you 🫶🏼🤝🏻🤲🏼open hands arms for safe hugs if u need. 🧚🏼‍♂️🧚🏼

@sunnygirl9691 2 жыл бұрын

Omg what you are talking about around 8:00 I was just thinking about this AM how crowded areas designed to attract people in droves (bars, restaurants, greenways) can be sooo.. well, just too much!! It’s like dumping a cup of powdered sugar on a cupcake 😖. Other people don’t seem to notice the excessive-ness of it.

@saskiaulbricht 6 ай бұрын

I'm in Spain. Just learned about you recently and I'm fascinated!

@penelopeperez5349 2 жыл бұрын

Amazing lecture Irene, thank you ! And just in time for me as I tend to go to 'extremes' at work so it was a really good reminder to come back to balance and make sure that I take care of myself proactively by practicing 'repair self care' vs 'survival self-care'.. thanks again ! :)

@janiceburgess4760 6 ай бұрын

First time on your talks from Utah thank you for what you do. Self care is what I’m doing

@DalCecilRuno 11 ай бұрын

The whole thing about telling others “you did such a good job you’re amazing!” is making a lot of sense. I have been looking for resources on self-sabotage and these “fake encouraging compliments” and what is discussed in this video is making sense. As a disabled person (partial blindness) I get the “oh but that makes you so special” remarks very often. I know that is also called ableism and condescension, but some people mean well. It still sends me down a self-sabotaging spiral. I don’t want to be special, I just want to do a good job because I enjoy doing something, like everyone else does. I need to get on this research path. Thank you for sharing.

@IreneLyon 11 ай бұрын

@DalCecilRuno, Jen here from Team Lyon. You mentioned you want to get on this research path. If it resonates, you might check out Irene's free Healing Trauma video training. It can be a good way to start to dive deeper into learning about this nervous system work. Free 3-part Healing Trauma video training - irenelyon.com/healing-trauma

@DalCecilRuno 11 ай бұрын

@@IreneLyon thank you, Jen. At this time of my life I can’t afford anything other than food (disabled person in the global south, go figure), but I can research in my spare time and I am working on it. Thank you. I’ll check out the videos.

@IreneLyon 11 ай бұрын

@@DalCecilRuno, Irene does have a lot of free resources so definitely check those out when you're ready. If you have questions, just let us now.

@jed88 3 ай бұрын

25:50 - 26:50 this is or at least was the case for retired Australian police officers. Studies have been conducted. Theory behind checking out early in their sixth decade was because once they slowed down, had caught up on everything and didn't have something too occupy the mind and time. Advice given is to keep going!

@otrinolaringolog 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for what you do!!))

@ClaireHurst-ce1ob 9 ай бұрын

Thanks so much! I learn so much from these videos! So delighted to have found these!

@pingwinek512 Жыл бұрын

This one is really great, addressed a lot of my questions, thank you!

@missfeliss3628 10 ай бұрын

i wasnt rewarded or punished and i have zero self motivation lol....but im getting better thru improving my mental health... motivation shouldnt be something u have to think about and muster up and get some resolve .... u should just go from one thing to another without having to take some time to muster up the motivation lol

@dianaking8828 8 ай бұрын

It’s November 2023. Tuned in from Sydney

@evemichelle Ай бұрын

You can do both. 'Well done for eating your veg. How did that feel?' A little child won't just do things like that they need to know what's good and bad. Praise your kids! Research shows its the opposite of damaging.

@JS-lm3lq Жыл бұрын

Hi I am from Toronto, Ontario Canada ❤

@Holly9473 7 ай бұрын

There’s a big difference between praise for its own sake and having a spontaneous joyful reaction over something. I can see how praise for its own sake is damaging, but if you burst out into a big smile when you’re genuinely and spontaneously delighted about something your kid does, it would be crazy to stifle that.

@liz.a314 2 жыл бұрын

Yes I relate to Mikkos comment - for me self care is pretty much impossible bc the body is terrified to stop

@leila595 8 ай бұрын

THey didn't have means to investigate & gather information about illnesses and disorders, either; or they were named smth else. But it's true, the infantilisation of today's adult-aged people is unheard of. Lovely videos, btw! "Rough and raw", yes! :) :) - same generation

@miriamceornea97 Жыл бұрын

EDGAR CAYCE well, that explains a lot

@annstreuve7690 9 ай бұрын

From Belgium,new to your method but so glad that it came on my path 🙏

@IreneLyon 9 ай бұрын

Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Thank you for your feedback. I recommend checking out this free training, which might answer some of your questions irenelyon.com/healing-trauma

@miriamceornea97 Жыл бұрын

I don't want to be pessimistic about how long my father is going to be able to keep up with himself, I kind of have come to terms with it but this is what I told my him, he has been working very hard and a heavy duty job for many years, he never sits still and when he dose on Sundays he laments always having back pain, I told him once, without knowing much about all this things, "you know why I believe your back hurts only on your rest days? it is because when you work you are so distracted from the pain in your body that when it get's a chances to relax it starts to reveal under how much strain you are putting it throw", they always deny my statements, to be honest, I least I tried and how told them they need to take more care of themselves but hey... it is that taffness they have grown up with, you have to work hard and then you are in the habit of it that standing still makes you restless and so on

@patiencejewel 2 жыл бұрын

I love you Irene, and for these long talks, I need time stamps, or I can't make time to listen.

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Time stamps coming soon!

@debbl7311 2 жыл бұрын

This was so helpful, thank you! Does John Barnes MFR count as body work, and will it help with healing early trauma? Also, what credentials should I watch for when looking for a somatic healing therapist?

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Debb, Seth here with Team Lyon. Sorry, I'm not familiar with that work so I can't speak to it's efficacy for healing early trauma. In terms of what to look for in a somatic practitioner, Irene made a video just about that :). Here you go.... kzfaq.info/get/bejne/ZpqIeZpys9TVd58.html

@lovecreatesfreedom 2 жыл бұрын

It would be great if the links mentioned in the video were also added into the description here.

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Yup! They are coming soon!

@mariettejoubert9273 2 жыл бұрын

Mariette Joubert from Tasmania Australia. Enrolled in Smart Body Smart Mind.

@anjavlasblom8158 2 жыл бұрын

Mariette I do the 21 days! How is it to do SBSM?

@mariettejoubert9273 2 жыл бұрын

@@anjavlasblom8158 Great so far!

@anjavlasblom8158 2 жыл бұрын

@@mariettejoubert9273 Fantastic, maybe for me next year!! Enjoy your trip!!

@juiorchevsxx 2 жыл бұрын

I am currently uncovering for myself what I believe to be a lot of complex trauma and a mixed functional freeze state - digestion off, lowered heart rate, constant buzz stopping me from sleeping, feeling detached from sense of self, body and physical reality and a lot of anxious thinking but almost lost ability to panic and FEEL anxious. I have found what I believe to be a trauma informed therapist who’s very experienced in EMDR. My biggest fear is being pushed further into freeze. What are some good signs I’m re-regulating and coming ‘back online’? I understand to steer clear from meditating and too much breath work. What can you recommend as my first port of call in recovery? Thank you so much for all the life saving education you offer x

@bebaaskaful 2 жыл бұрын

EMDR is not specifically covering early developmental trauma. Because it works threw explicit memory. But it can help to unfreeze. It is very potenet for PTSD. But Irene is speaking about creating space and building our capacity, and EMDR can create some space if you are ready. And therapist must scale you if you are ready, and belive me, it brings up a lot of emotions and you are not ready ever. Our capacity is too small to handle, all stuff if stuck deep inside. And when you think what is going to happen, you cant even imagine this energy and what could it be. I wasnt ready, but I could handle it. These days working EMDR is disturbing but Im much more ready. It helped me with disgust and grief I call emotional pain, anger, and fear. Also some boundaries starts to setlle biologicaly. But my therapist works also a Somatic psychotherapy so I dont do only EMDR. It is not enough for CPTSD. This is why I work SBSM also and Irenes work because it teaches you to heal youreself. It is not enough to do therapy once a week, and then doing nothing in between. EMDR has some tails drop in between two sessions but it can be so disturbing sometimes that you need tools when you get so much stuff going on. Unfreeze looks like feeling more, fear, anxiety comes up. Sensation, awerness, emotions, everything gets stured up. It is unpleasant at first but then if you use the knowledge about why this is going on you procede and setlle a bit. Freeze will not come up if youre system is not ready yet. In my case, EMDR somehow braked the resistance, but everything else was finding my own path what soothes me, and this is form Irenes work definetlly. Early developmental, you dont have a clue what happened but still having waves of sensations. I havent got to that place yet. And it will come on this journey. I know from expirience that somatic work is the base for all things, polyvagal, and grounding. And everything about that is conected in SBSM. And you will be going in states of freeze and sympathetic energy. You cant be in the other direction all the time. More freeze getting out is when you can be conected between youre body and higher brain. You cant lift all the freeze at once. It is a slowly process. Hope that this helped you.

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Ellie Chevs, Jen here from Team Lyon. I'd recommend getting to know your nervous system so that you can both take steps on your own to support the growth of nervous system regulation and capacity and also develop the skill of knowing how to recognize when you're reaching your capacity and needs to pause and then communicate this to your practitioner. Irene developed and introductory course to teach people foundational skills. It's called the 21 Day Nervous System Tune Up. I'll link to it here in case you want to check it out. Another thing that can be very helpful is to let your practitioner know that you want to go very slowly so that you can time to notice how your system responds to the EMDR before going further. We call this "titration" in this work. I'll link to a video about that too. Titration Explained: Never Rush Trauma Healing - irenelyon.com/2020/04/26/titration-explained-never-rush-trauma-healing/ 21 Day Nervous System Tune Up - 21daytuneup.com

@lauren6891 Жыл бұрын

Would love to know your thoughts on this. If a child is raised from 0-7 or is at least taught at some point (whether in child or adult years) the "how did that feel to do that," type of questions instead of praise and learns how to have intrinsic motivation. Can they handle external praise and let that be there without being motivated by it or let it steer thier compass. I find in my own healing work I can now recieve external praise or criticism but am led by my own inner compass and how i feel more than letting the external praise motivate me and or critism derail me. I also use alot of internal praise for myself. Good job Lauren you're doing great keep going don't give up. You are taking good care of yourself. Good job taking time to feel that emotion etc. Is this the equivalent to being motivated by external incentives? It seems to work really well for me. And I often use this type of praise, especially celebrating the little victories we often overlook when working with others. The example you gave about scoring the goal. Would saying something good job staying focused. Be different than a general good job that you scored? Also if someone doesn't score I can always find something to stay congratulatory. If I were talking to myself and I didn't score i would say something like oh almost got it I'm getting quicker at setting up the shot. Or that was a great kick alittle to the left next time. Making it more about my journey and growth rather than scoring vs not scoring. If there is no concept of you're good if you score but not good if you don't score does this change the detrimental effects of praise? I tend to always find something to cheer about or look at from a Positive angle even during a defeat or seemed failure. So i was wondering if the issue with praise is the your a winner vs loser concept. You get my attention then you dont get my attention, love, gift whatever it is. If you give the same regardless I wonder if the praise would still be as detrimental.

@IreneLyon Жыл бұрын

lauren, Jen here from Team Lyon. You asked if young kids can handle external praise and let it be there without being motivated by it and letting it steer their compass. When we're young, we're dependent on our caregivers and those around us for survival, for regulation, and to learn how to be with ourselves and the world. If these people consistently model regulation, and meet the child with curiosity about their experience, then some occasional praise will likely not be enough to make the child dependent on this praise and their well being. You also wrote quite a bit about how the idea of "good job" works for you. It can certainly be helpful to do what works and having some positive feedback can be supportive at times It may also help to counteract the negative responses that many of us experienced and internalized. And, it's important to note that this is different than turning to one's authentic, present moment experience for guidance and as a source of wellbeing and making space for all of our experience - be it pleasant, unpleasant, comfortable, uncomfortable, neutral, "good" or "bad". If you're curious and want to play with this, you might also play with steps that invite awareness of inner experience. A few examples of present focused stems include I feel, I notice, I appreciate, I want, I don't want, I like, I don't like.

@lauren6891 Жыл бұрын

@@IreneLyon thank you for your thorough response!

@goodvibesonly1273 2 жыл бұрын

Namaste Irene lyon I am Kanchan Masand from New Delhi

@karoketecuci2581 2 жыл бұрын

I watched the youtube release trauma video with great interest and I have many thoughts. I know that science is somehow at the beginning of the study of traumas, that is, many questions are still unanswered. if it is possible that there is a connection between the type of trauma and the place in the body where it is blocked and how it can be released. there is definitely a red thread that differs in color from the body ..... more if there is a connection betweenthere is definitely a red thread that differs in color from the "other threads", ie various types of trauma and various reactions in the body ..... certainly in the future it would be interesting to make a kind of classification by type, consequences, storage location, type of sensation intensity, etc

@birgip.m.1236 9 ай бұрын

Every person is unique & can feel & store trauma in so many different ways & places -not just from others but differently within one's own life path at different times & situations. Louise Hay's book is a good starter but there is no map to everybody & body & experience & how it's processed.

@birgip.m.1236 9 ай бұрын

*Louise Hay's book: "Heal Your Body, Heal Your Life" Again, it's just a primer to enter the journey of finding what our body is trying to tell us. My body can store various emotions in various places. And that changes.

@kingtahaa1125 2 жыл бұрын

Irene my adrenaline’s are very bad , please make a video of adrenaline excerises to calm it’s down.

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hi King Tahaa, Jen here from Team Lyon. ALL of this work that Irene teaches in some way related to supporting the nervous system in learning to access all the various states - including the ones that support feelings of calm and restoration - and to move between the various states as needed based on what's happening moment to moment. I'll link to a few of Irene's free practices, and you might also want to check out her 21 Day Tune Up course which teaches the basics related to this work. DIY: Ancient Anxiety Medicine - kzfaq.info/get/bejne/Zq9zpsWJuqmvnYE.html&lc=UgzKvm65Pqe9xARznlN4AaABAg 4 Simple Steps to Calm Overwhelm - irenelyon.com/4-steps-to-calm-overwhelm/ 21 Day Nervous System Tune Up - 21daytuneup.com

@Mae.B. 2 жыл бұрын

Could the links that were posted during the live stream, in the live chat, be added here please? There wasn’t a way to highlight and copy those links, and when I clicked (after live ended), and then tried to come back to get the next link ... the live chat is not accessible. ❤️🙏🏻♥️ TIA

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hey there MAe.B_So Mae.B_Not, Seth here with Team Lyon. All the links to the resources mentioned will be posted, along with timestamps of the different topics, under the video within 24 hours.

@Mae.B. 2 жыл бұрын

@@IreneLyon Thank you very much! Greatly appreciated!

@amandabennett6489 6 ай бұрын

I literally don’t even know what to do for self care. Even when I’m sick… unless I am knocked out I still think about what I should be doing. I know It’s not good for me but I’m stuck on a loop.

@IreneLyon 6 ай бұрын

Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Irene offers abundant free resources to get you started at your own pace. I highly suggest you check these out irenelyon.com/free-resources/

@sharonbruyere9488 2 жыл бұрын

I am currently a SBSM member. I came across a podcast on KZfaq with an interview with Dr. Jeffrey Rutstein, who also works in the trauma field. He spoke about a new 9 month healing trauma program he created and he mentioned also working with the teachings of Peter Levine and Gabor Mate in this program. Just curious if SBSM is basically the same teachings as this program. I am assuming it probably is because Peter Levine is involved. Have you heard of this

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hey Sharon, Seth here with Team Lyon. It's likely that there will be some overlap, but SBSM isn't based just on the teachings of Peter Levine and Gabor Mate, but also on the teachings of Moshe Feldenkrais and Kathy Kain, and is also informed by Irene's background in Health Science. So I would say it's likely that SBSM is more intensive and varied, but impossible to say for sure without seeing what Dr. Rutstein has created.

@liz.a314 2 жыл бұрын

Question around the ‘wild child’ example - is the reason we have to teach children routine because we are now domesticated? I’m just thinking of our ancestors and how they probably didn’t need that as much right?

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Liz A, Jen here from Team Lyon. While I can't say for sure because I wasn't raised in a tribe (perhaps for better and for worse!), my understanding is that many tribes have rituals and customs that are passed on to the children through both teaching and modeling. I'm not sure if you're referring to specific elements of routine, and I imagine there may be elements of routine in some tribal rituals and customs.

@MsVenture1 7 ай бұрын

NH…just found you…I have come to the question in my world…Why do I Self Sabotage.

@IreneLyon 7 ай бұрын

Hello, Sophia from Team Lyon here. Here is what Irene has previously said about self-sabotage kzfaq.info/get/bejne/qbOqe8p9zty2lY0.html , kzfaq.info/get/bejne/n5l0fpR3lbGnhKs.html . Enjoy your stay here!

@eneff1108 4 ай бұрын

Replay!

@birgip.m.1236 9 ай бұрын

Nurture Shock sounds like evaluation / assessment / external validation Damned if you get validation Damned if you don't Both can create validation junkies But We are social animals & it's part of our survival to get social approval-acceptance & validation

@birgip.m.1236 9 ай бұрын

This reminds me of the damage that yet another male doctor-researcher caused... Dr.Ferber ... whereby moms were told to let their babies cry ... don't pick them up to soothe & pacify them Whole generations have been "Ferberized" which has caused an emptiness-a void-a lack of basic loving nurturing Maybe some day humans will get it right 😉

@nireeburr 11 ай бұрын

1:05:09 🙅🏼🙆🏼happening atm.. But the offenders are not around me . But I’m still behaving like so. I really want to be better. This lady is ticking all the boxes.. there’s only one ☝🏼 of her. Pls take care of u also..we need Want like enjoy seek you 🧚🏼‍♂️🙏🏻💯

@melissawilson6167 10 ай бұрын

T1D auto immune (post Covid/post vax SFNoBay area at 56 ... self care not working

@IreneLyon 10 ай бұрын

@melissawilson6167, it sounds like you may be new around here. If that's the case, here's a link to Irene's New Here? page. - Jen from Team Lyon New here? - irenelyon.com/new-here/

@Michael-dp2uj 2 жыл бұрын

can we get time stamps

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

They are coming soon!

@chantellekaro4344 2 жыл бұрын

I'm also waiting

@MichelleMeier-nb3qp 6 ай бұрын

Montana

@inforthewin3231 2 жыл бұрын

Ive been in a fight or flight for a couple years now and i try everything to heal it. But I kinda in a roadblock right now. I trying to do somatic experiencing techniques myself, orienting, feeling sensations, touch, smell etc But it like im not fully "connecting to it" Tell me if I'm doing it correctly I acknowledge the shaky anxious fluttery tight sensation in my chest, the thumping swirly nervousness in my stomach, a lot of tight tension in my neck and shoulders, and my tight breathing. I try to orient and ground myself with SE techniques but it as if the Fight or flight sensation in my chest and stomach distract me from fully relaxing into it. And if I do feel the uncomfortable sensations ... its very hard to deeply connect with it. I only acknowledge them. When I rarely do connect, my mind gets anxious and over exaggerates the sensations and I feel overwhelmed. I believe I have a lot of unresolved fight or flight energy, I always feel anxious, fear, danger, nervous, doing everything fast, when I'm relaxed it doesn't feel "relaxed". its so annoying when I'm watering the plants, the stupid fight or flight sensations make me feel like I have to run and cant relax instead of normal person watering plants 5 seconds each i feel so anxious and fight or flight that I only water each plant for 1 second and feel like i have to "GO GO GO FAST" . its so fucking annoying it makes me angry. Quality of life has been shit. I just want to feel relax and present. Its like I'm disconnected from my body. these fight/flight sensations have controlling me for years. I WANT MY LIFE BACK

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

Hey InForTheWin32, Seth here with Team Lyon. It sounds like you've made a good start by noticing what is happening with your physiology in the first place, and working to bring in some grounding and settling, great job! The thing is, when there is intense fight/flight energy happening, it often doesn't work to try and settle it, and we need to learn to go WITH the activation and let it do what it needs to do, in a safe and contained way, which can feel scary and potentially overwhelming, and can take awhile to learn how to do. It may be that working with a good somatic practitioner would be helpful, so they can help guide you into that work, or if you prefer to be self-directed, Irene's 21 Day Tune Up is a great option, and more affordable to be sure. Or both! Also I have an article that could be good for you to read, to give some tips on how to get started working with that fight/flight energy in productive ways. Article - sethlyon.com/healthy-aggression-the-way-to-un-frustrate-frustration/ 21 Day Tune Up - www.nstuneup.com/ How to find a good practitioner - kzfaq.info/get/bejne/ZpqIeZpys9TVd58.html

@anjavlasblom8158 2 жыл бұрын

@@IreneLyon Thanks Seth I have the same issue!!

@IreneLyon 2 жыл бұрын

@@carinagrennan129, Jen here from Team Lyon. You have lifetime access to the 21 Day Tune Up when you join, so you can take as long as you want to finish it. In fact, it's recommend that you do it at your pace.