I stayed because I loved him more than myself...

“What kind of day are we going to have? What mood will he be in today?” I think this All. The. Time

I left my abusive husband after watching the true story of Tina Turner. I took my two small children and left everything we owned behind. I left the state and stayed with my little sister until I could get on my own feet. Life was so hard being a single mother but I finally met a nice man who helped me finish raising my children. Get out because love does exist and there are men that will never hit you or verbally abuse you. God bless all courageous woman that are now living in a terrifying situation and those brave souls that have left.

I think the worst case scenario is when the perpetrators family encourage and support his behavior and even though they see it, they pretend they don't.

I left yesterday. I could not take it anymore. He was a covert narcissist, emotionally, mentally, verbally and physically abusive. He blackmailed me for months, isolated me from my family and friends but I reached a breaking point and left yesterday on Emancipation day. I emancipated myself from that demon. Thank you God 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

She stays because “She has her power back” oh my goodness that was truth to me right now

Abusers beware. Time's up thanks to survivors like this who have broken the silence and have stepped forward to educate others. Thank you!

I can't believe I stayed so long. For five years. I have been free for about ten years, I have two children with my soulmate I found seven years ago. Run. If you are a victim of domestic violence, run when you can with what you can and never ever look back. You are worth it, you deserve love. Happiness. Safety.

i cant stop crying watching this. this is my relationship with my ex EXACTLY. he almost ruined my life. i was suicidal, and extremely depressed

Cognitive dissonance, gaslighting, guilt kept me in an abusive relationship for 11 years. Out over a year now. Working on me.

Her story is EXACTLY like mine. Almost identical. I never thought I would be abused...I never thought my boyfriend would try to strangle me to death...but I was wrong.

It took me almost 10 years to leave my first, and almost 8 years to leave my second. Finally broke the cycle in 2011 when I met an angel...my current partner of almost 9 years now. He helped me heal, and showed me how real men treat and love women. Thank you for sharing your story with us...it takes a huge amount of courage to tell our stories. 🙏♥️✨

Cognitive Dissonance and idealism are what kept me there. Boundaries helped me make the decision to leave.

God bless all women who get out of abusive relationships, I thank God he kept me alive and let me escape my abuser many years ago. Thank you for your story.

Everybody should study and spend time understanding “ narcissistic personality Disorder “

Yes we don't even know it's abuse til we're out away from them...

Those who gave thumbs down to this important information must be mad that she spoke about them.

I stayed with my abusive boyfriend for three years because I was stuck, broken, because I didn’t want my abusive ex husband to tell people “see? She can’t make anything work.” I was so stuck in abuse and one abusive partner after the other for years that I believed I was the cause. I’m in my first non abusive relationship in twenty years now. I’m 50. I feel like a child, grateful, overwhelmed, amazed. I wish I’d lived this beautiful life all along.

36 years of marriage abuse. I identify with what you say here. I'm out now. I'm still a little guilty about leaving. But I'm happy now. It was insane. Thanks for the speech.

Narcissistic abuse .... narcissistic abuse 100%

You are so lucky that you never had a child with him. I was married to a man for over 10 years who put me through an almost identical situation. I finally broke free from him and those wounds are beginning to heal. Some already have. But it's hard to reconcile having had a child with such a monster. Not only that, he still tries to use my daughter as a pawn to manipulate me, even though he hasn't lived with me in about a year. I used to be so strong and he weakened me to almost nothing. He put me on a pedestal and I was his "prize" to show off; but it was more or less a pedestal in a Cage. Thank you for this video and I'm glad you are healthy, strong, and safe now. Blessings to you and your children. Namaste🙏🙏🙌❤💚💯

It’s insane how we all have the same skeleton of our abuse. The details are different but that cycle … I love all of you for surviving. Let’s keep talking about it

Entering my 30's, I'm learning what not to be and what not to do

I needed to hear this. After 11 years of mental , and physical abuse I found the strength to leave and not just go into the other room. He chocked me and pushed me around anytime I tried to walk away from him. I’ll pray to not go back.

I feel your pain, I feel so blessed because I left a physically and emotionally abusive relationship I’ve tried my best to fix it but it was never enough I made infinity of sacrifices but it wasn’t appreciated I am so happy I got divorced yesterday and I left the Romeo forever

The very definition of living with a behind closed doors Cluster B. Get out. Stay out. Never ever go back.

"He would throw things, break things.." yeah! And ever notice how, remarkably, not one of those items belonged to him!? Yeah, think about that one.

Kudos to those men and women who decide to break the circle of abuse, and decide to leave. Its not easy, i saw it with one brother and one sister. And it is painful for them and us their family.

10 years of my life went down the drain. My teenage years, my youth. Despite the loose ends, it’s been almost a year since i broken up with him. Her story is way too similar to mine, minus the physical. Honestly though, we are all becoming too numb and the emotional abuse, the physical, all equally hurts. If what i said resonated with you, i hope you find hope and courage to leave. Please leave, please hope again. If you think you reach the point of no hope and you just cant wait to sleep forever, then you have nothing to lose anymore. Leave. Walk away and leave.

I feel like this woman just read my story word for word. I would never have called my relationship abusive. But it’s almost identical

I am disgusted by the guy's sister. She knew what her brother was capable of.

Yes I understand 100%. I was in an abusive relationship for 40 years. Now I have had 2 bad strokes and 5 pinched nerves at my brain stem. I have to see doctors and nurologists and councilors for ITS. Which I didn't even know anyone that has not been to war can have. But they explained I was at war every day. I had to fight for my life everyday. Until you have lived it no one understands. I was in love or so I thought. I was taught and raised to make your marriage work no matter what. That's why I stayed

This is horrific, it's devastating to see that so many people in the comments have gone through the same; and people go through this every day! It takes a lot of courage to share this story, thank you!

When you forgive him and accept him back, his respect for lowers even more.

For the longest time I never thought that I was in an emotional abuse situation. Since it wasn’t physical I thought that it was fine. Since he was “nice enough” it was fine. But not being complemented and only told what to wear. Not touched when I wanted to but when he did. Being forced out of friendships. It’s crazy now to think it took me ten years and all of my twenties to figure it out. Now at 30 I’m getting a divorce and I’m going to show my kids how a woman can love herself.

Romeo will flatter you; shower you w gifts, shatter you confidence & then discard you only to do it over

I went through something similar, but left before it progressed to the physical level. I had the psychological and mental abuse. And he trie to come back but I didn’t open the door.

Sadly I could relate but luckily I'm out of it now!

I recently escaped from an abusive relationship, it was the worst relationship I have ever been in. Almost 2 years And their family used me aswell. Emotional and Mental abuse.

Because he never hit me I thought it wasn't "abuse". But it was. I've left him but I feel he took everything from me. I find no reason to wake up in the mornings, no "hope" like she said. I'm on anti depressants and I get panic attacks on the daily. I still find myself thinking, "it's okay, you can fix it. He wasn't that bad. He loved you." I don't know how to escape my own head.

Separated for four months now.... but I still want my marriage to work. I started to miss my husband from last week but I’m not going back unless he takes full responsibility and work on himself. New immigration, separation, physical abuse, past physical abuse, trauma, childhood trauma....I’m so overwhelmed. I don’t know how I’m still keep going.

Thank you so much for sharing. I was released from the ER this morning after having a heavy kitchen counter stool bashed at my desk and kicked on the floor. I’m working hard on making him realize he’s a joke and I will get past this darkness without him in my life.

Finding this video , must be God answering my prayers . A very big thank you for this video , everything she spoke about describes my life right now. After reading through the comments section I feel like there is hope.

If you come across this video. Please don't think it is by mistake or coincidence. God bless you to see this for a reason. If you are in this situation. Know that all is well, and God have better for you, and you don't have to stay in this mess in Jesus name.

I was in a abusive relationship last summed thankfully I got away from him because he ended up going to prison. It’s been about a year an a half now and I’m still trying to find myself again. It ruined me as a person.

I stayed because I loved him so much and truly thought he would eventually change or stop hitting me or threatening me when he became upset

So many similarities...watch the LOVE BOMBER - this is a HUGE RED FLAG I MISSED - It can happen to the strongest women...I know - I am a survivor! Thank you for the contrast X husband - so I know EXACTLY what I don't want - I will forever be grateful...

My story of getting free from my abuser is different from hers. I broke up with him but he will not leave. I was living with my grandfather and brothers. I will tell him to get out and he won't leave. My grandfather always opened the door for him. I went to court to get a restraining order but he was sitting in my living room when I made it home. I walked in and immediately turned around to go and call the police. He ran after me and began beating me up. The police did nothing but said that I took him back but that was not true. He was waiting for me when I got home and I tried to get away. I decided that I was going to one to leave my grandfather's home. Still, my baby daddy followed me breaking into my home. I ran to the police sitting in a car for help, the officer told me that I was going to just take him back. I said, "I have a restraining order." Still, the officer didn't even attempt to get out of his car. My abuser got a 2x4 and knocked a hole in my front door and reached his hand in to unlock the door. I grabbed his hand and cut his wrist. The police asked him does he want to press charges against me. The police officers insisted that this man and I were a couple. I had to explain to them that this person doesn't live with me and I never let him into my home. He would not have to break in if he lived there. The police told me that it was not safe for me to live in my home because of my abuser. I moved out of state to escape him. My abuser traveled out of state searching for me. My abuser stalked me for over 2 years before he left and moved up North. Think about it we were only a couple for 3 months. This was over 20 years ago and he still tries to contact me through his child. Sometimes the only way for a woman to get rid of her abuser is for her abuser to find another victim or kill him.

Yes, never open the door to an Abuser. Once an abuser always an abuser. They never change, only develop more strategies to deceive you until they achieve what they willfully set out to do which is to Erase Your Entire Life.

Some women don’t leave because they literally have no where to go.

they make you feel like you need them to love you, but in reality, they need you to love themselves. don’t allow yourself to be used for that, use that love for yourself, for the ones that truly deeply care. the ones that if they knew the reality of the situation, they would do everything in their power to show you how much more you deserve, and how much that person has been taking that away from you. i stayed for the same reason as she described, i stayed because he managed to make me believe like he was the only one who truly cared and loved me. but in a healthy relationship, you would never have to feel like your significant other is your only hope. that person should encourage you to do the things you love, be around the people you love, and make you feel loved; not feel worthless, unlovable, dependent on their own well being to be okay.

Wow. Great job explaining the ways that emotional abuse manifests in the every day life of a couple living a dysfunctional relationship! Very real, very accurate.

I am M.D. coming from loving and supportive family was in a relationship for 3 years . My nightmare begins when I unplanned got pregnant when he became emotional and psychological abusive. He abused me so much so that I miscarried . I couldn' t recognize him who he was . He started abusing me when I didn't play by his rules a.k.a. he didn't want to take responsibility for the child. I had to fly in my mother so he would stop and leave the appartment. He never apologized or showed some remorse. Even had to go to police.But fortunately for me I managed to keep calm and collected even though I feared him . This nightmare is over hopefully but dont think the man who are educated and nice won't abuse you and don't think that because you are well off and educated this will never happen to you . The saddest part that there are always women who will say or think that you are at fault and men get away with the abuse

I’m going through the same thing. I’m here listening to this with a bruised face

Been in such similar situations. He's story is inspiring yet what's off putting is when someone says they left something abusive and somehow they found the right guy. I'm happy for her, yet I don't believe that you need to meet someone else to have a happy ever after and know youre worthy. If you do happen to meet someone; then great, if not youre still a star!

I was searching for how to stay married to an abusive husband; in hopes to find ways to fix him. Mine is emotional abuse rather than physical, but I can relate to everything she was saying. Is there hope, or is the only solution to get out.

There are patterns in abuse, if you pay attention you will see the rollercoaster ride. Thank You for sharing your story! ..... It takes the courage to open up and talk about it to start the conversation to hopefully save someone elses life! God Bless You!

This is so profoundly sick, I almost want to believe it couldn't possibly have happened the way she's saying.

Most men wouldn't dare add a comment. I know this kind of emotional abuse. It's also a learned behavior or an understanding of behavior carried on/imprinted, sometimes by the victim. Emotional and mental abuse isn't always physical and can be any mentality. men, women gender neutral or adolescent.

I lived this exact same narcissistic abuse. I just realized that I was ABUSED TOO. 5 years later I am finally ready to share my story to help others like us. I have healed and agree TIME IS UP! 🙏🏻❤️

Emotional abuse can hurt just as much as physical abuse. Abusers can make you feel as though you are losing your mind. When I was with my ex that I was walking on eggshells and as if I couldn't do anything right. I never knew what would make him mad. I was always scared if I said or did the wrong thing he would leave me since he always threatened to break up with me. Sometimes I didnt even know why. I blessed that I found the strength to leave him. If I didnt leave I was afraid he would start beating me.

Once you have been a victim or rather survivor of abuse, its too easy to repeat the pattern of relationship' type. For myself, I'm still hoping to find the kind of love that my parents had. They genuinely were made for each other. Equally yolked, both pulling in the same direction, their love and respect for each other never dimmed with the passing years. I guess I yearn for that closeness and security and mutual joy. I thought, in my innocence, that everyone was like that. Consequently, I was vulnerable to abuse...abusers can stiff out innocent' trust. Its very sad that so few find true love.

struggling to get out of my emotional abusive relationship. very helpful and inspiring

My situation is so twisted. The honeymoon phase in the cycle in my relationship is me begging my abuser for forgiveness because he always convinces me everything was my fault.

You conveyed this little known formulaic nightmare so well. ❤ May Peace Radiate From You Healing Those Who Sadly Understand.

This needs to be shared.This is so prevalent and commonplace and all you have is a nagging feeling that something is wrong. She is brave to share her story.

Yeah Right person won't feel insecure. Insecurity kills relationships.

It's seems it's really hard for a woman in love to see an abusive partner from the beginning. In all this the solution is to speak up.

Mada you are describing my 28 year marriage. I was not allowed friends or see my side of the family. Had three marriage counsellors were she fired the last one. I never had a bank card or did any of the finances as I TRUSTED her. Finally the lies started to show up as my cheques were being forged and in bad debt. I took the Bull by the horns and started the changes which in turn she had the Courts involved were most of the 22 Judges I had hammered me every time I was in Court. My children went to their mothers side as with me working two jobs and paying so much support I had to live on -$5.00/hr. Lost every thing only to live with friends or on the street. I was glad to get a Divorce after the abuse. After not seeing my children for 15 years my one son shows up to see Dad. I found out all my children in their 30's are suffering with mental illness and Depression and still living with the Abuser. How does this happen and was told it is the Stockholm Syndrome. Terrible out come.

I really want to walk away from him , i am very tired of him . 😢😭😭

I think it is important to know his or her family history. Fast engagements or marriages are not always a wise decision. I thank God for this lady's testimony among others who have also lived to testify. They have and still are teaching me to pray, observe and make wise decisions, concerning relationships/marriage. Love is a choice, but don't let anyone "cut off your nose to spoil your face", if you know what I mean. God's Peace & Blessings to you all!

He was only physical with me a few times but the emotional and mental abuse was just as you described. It's impossible to explain to people why I stayed for so long..."if it was that bad...why didn't you just leave" they ask or because he wasn't physically abusive, it somehow negates the years of crushing isolation and debasement. He has been gone for a few years now and I still can't shake the feelings shame/failure for not being enough for him. I have crippling fear that he will comeback and say all the right things and I will be too weak to say "No". I'm sorry your situation was so horrible but I really appreciate you sharing because in listening to this talk suddenly I feel less alone in my journey....Nothing compared to yours but your words rang so true....Thank you.

Thanks for sharing! I needed to hear this. It brought up some painful memories. Women can abuse and manipulate men as well.

I identify with this situation so much, we hope it gets better as it's getting worse...

Your mum is very courageous,my family is Greek too and I am discovering just how much of a hold my mother has on me and my children who are autistic as well as my severely disabled son who is in a wheelchair with pegfeeds. I hope we can get through this without a too much pain. Thankyou to your mum as well.

"Every single minute of my day. . ." Love bombing. "It had a name" Abuse, trauma bond, covert/overt abuse. "Time is up" Breaking free. Healing that inner child. Changing your beliefs. That hit me.

about to leave a psychologically abusive partner, I'm scared but also proud of myself (╯︵╰,)

She never beg me to stay. She never apologize to me either she literally told me I deserved it and I made her do it to me every single time.

wow... the ignoring and not paying attention... wow.. I mean a lot of the things she says are the same that ive gone through. I thought i was going crazy but after listening to these I see I'm not :(

I have been in this situation since i was 28. I am 41 😢 and we have a 5 yr old daughter. He is a manipulative narcissist alcoholic. I try to stay away. I finally did for 6 months. Unfortunately i heard he was doing bad. I went back and took him to the hospital for his pancreas. Now i feel I’m back in that hole and cant get out again.

I have been looking for a video about this for quite some time! Thank You so much! This is a conversation that everyone needs to be part of because this kind of abuse cycle is effecting more and more peoples lives, and we can cure it! I wish there was more information about how to get help. What most women, and children, need is a place to go to be safe long term

I'm so sick of the cycle. abusers will NEVER change. Only thing that will change it, is us leaving. which is so so hard.

i have a friend who is in such a situation. i don't know how to help her. she won't leave her bf and won't find somebody else. good thing is that her bf isn't physically abusive at least as far as i know.

I can relate to your story very much. I went from victim to victor of Domestic Violence 9 years ago and am Thriving and sharing my story with the world through my Podcast to help people break the silence and find their voice.

It's watching stuff like this that helped me see what was happening before it got legitimately bad. I at least can feel proud that I saw his bullcrap and he never had any power over me to abuse.

I left my ex because of emotional abuse, and we have a child together. That didn't stop him though and I'm still recovering.

Mada, I am so sorry you had to go through abuse, but I'm glad you found the strength to leave the power to heal in a healthy way & are able to have a happy ending with your beautiful family. 💗

In reality, people stay because they have created a facade which is more important to preserve than that they screwed up and need to get out of the relationship. You have to first admit you made a big mistake and that there person whom charmed you was a manipulator. You can't talk someone into seeing this, their foundation would crumble and they can't accept that.

Totally relate to this, taken me years to heal, still having flashbacks but have good friends and beautiful daughters that have walked through this with me.

The most powerful thing IS forgiveness, although I’m not quite there yet, I know it’s what will be me being free. It’s the resentment that stops me from overcoming and being me again.

I think that it's very important that abused women who finally got out, share therir story and that the abusers go to prison for the rest of their life!!

Thank you so much for sharing !

I’m crying so much that I’m having such a bad headache... because I’m in a abusive marriage. I know I’m being so naive that maybe one day my husband will change... then again it keeps happening. I’m so emotionally drained and hopeless. I’m praying to find the strength to fight the fear and just leave.

This reminded me of strength I forgot I had, thank you for this.

Can relate. Strength and self love. ♥️

Thank you for sharing 🙏🏻❤️

Scary, because this story is terrifying. To have an abuser who says exactly this about their victim... there are men out there suffering also, with multiple systems against them.

Right, abuse should not define you. They abused you, not you abusing them. They did it, you didn’t.

I’m so happy I found this video. I feel so validated in my experience.

Great talk!!! Thank you