"I think it's impossible to know one's self. I think it's much more interesting to know others." That's gold, right there.

"The extent of your memories determines how much you can imagine about the future." What an interesting idea.

I’m glad he’s sitting down.... I want those people speaking to be more comfortable and natural as they are talking with us. Very interesting.

The title should be called 'The Art of Being Human'. Is it just me or are people forgetting how to just be human.

I think what he's saying is you need to be humble. That is what is needed for listening. There is very little listening these days because there is very little humility.

I love to listen to elders, they have such experience of life that it is always interesting to hear what they have to say. They are a great source of knowledge

I need this man to be my grandpa

Talk TO each other. Not AT each other. Great talk 👍🏼

Active listening is an art that has been on the decline for a long time. Mr. Zeldin speaks well of the need to listen, hear, and process not simply that what aligns with our own opinions, but that what does not align in order to come to know and understand another person. This requires truly being present and focused in the moment with another individual. This is what is missing in many interactions between people, not just couples.

Everyone's upset because it s not about couples, stop being outraged about the title, learn to let go of the little inconveniences and enjoy this great content even if you eexpected something else...this exercise alone will help you have a happy couple. Peace

"Knowing others is the only thing that matters." Great point.

Being a couple requires you to have meaningful conversations, learning about each other. I assume you guys didnt get the message?

I believe that we need to have an authentic, loving relationship with ourselves first, and then share ourselves and our love with others. We have so much to share and to learn.

Is that you, Bilbo? Happy eleventy-first birthday!

(Some of) The 25 Questions to Ask: 1. How have your priorities changed over the years? 2. What do you think about your spending habits and what do you need that money cannot buy? 3. What would you like to be engraved on your tombstone? 4. Which parts of your life were a waste of time? 5. What have you rebelled against in the past - and what are you rebelling against now? 6. What are the limits of your compassion? 7. What moral, intellectual, aesthetic and social effects does the work you do have on others and on yourself? 8. What makes a life go well? How should one live? 9. How have you made and lost friendships and what other kinds of friends would you like? 10. What are your earliest memories of your childhood? 11. What brings you greatest happiness when you think back on your life so far? 12. If you could teach your children one thing - what would it be? 13. What do you think of Theodore Zeldin’s proposition that the greatest change since the agricultural revolution is that for the first time “men and women are talking with each other as equals”? 14. What motivates you to get up in the morning? 15. If you could do what ever you wanted - what would that be? 16. Describe your perfect partner? 17. Who would you lie for and whom wouldn’t you lie for? 18. In what way do you plan to leave the world a better place when you die? 19. With whom would you like to reconcile? 20. What have been the most difficult conversations for you? 21. What was the best moment you had with your parents? What the worst one? 22. What kind of humour do you prefer? 23. In what sense do you want to become more courageous? 24. Are there illusions that you cherish? 25. Which dream have you had and not fulfilled yet?

When an Educated person enlightens you they may or may not want to be generous with their insights. It not their job to educate others. We found him a soulful but a true magnanimous, and genuine humanitarian.

This is one of the most interesting Ted talks I've watched to date.

I had dementia and he said right thing focus on ur childhood memories I went back to my childhood place amd after five years of being lost, I have started regaining my memories

Yesterday I founded on Facebook a group called I LIVE EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT LIFE. In Western society, emotions seen as weaknesses. It is an internal energy that we can develop and navigate in our favor. This morning, I listened to Theodore TED expression and loved every word. Then I read about the speaker and saw that our past is from the same cultures. Then I looked at people's reactions and saw how human beings yearn to be more rational and enjoy (emotion) of themselves and the surrounding people. Yes, you are right; a person can understand and accept others only after he understands himself. In other words, when human understands his reasons for what he feels in the present, this means his feelings are intelligent.

All I can say is "I would like to hear a lot more what Theodore Zeldin has to say!" Wow what a lesson in kindness , compassion & original deep thinking! thank~you ;)

~“The Extent of your memories determines how much you can imagine about your future.”.... wow! But the Title is misleading. Not exclusive to couples but the art of listening and connecting. Learning to Speak and hear in a different way. So much more! I’m still processing! Very rich material!

The key to saving our failing civilization is community. Community is the most basic of concepts, yet it seems that we have forgotten its value...or perhaps we have never known it properly. Either way, with the great difficulties that we face in modern life (driven by population density), the only way to overcome is to work together. To work together, we must take time to know one another; and to know one another, we must communicate.

I really appreciate this talk. I always say that every 2 people have a language to discover. Being vulnerable is key. It leads to understanding. It's a release that leads us to a greater world of, each other. It's been written, Psalm 33:15 He who fashions the hearts of them all, Who considers and understands all that they do. Let us strive to do this💞

I love what he's preaching... aim for self realization, self fulfillment, knowing others is what life is all about and knowing oneself

'Opportunity insurance' (about 13 min in) is a great idea, and part of a blossoming of the resources that are right at hand (human talent, younger generations) who wish to have meaningful lives, have impact, and connect. Theodore's use of third spaces for connecting and learning is such a spark of creation.

I crave for talks like these . So brilliant .

If we will focus more on what we have and less on what we want from others. our relationships will be way better, become a giver!!!!

I had to rewind bc I knew i wasn't listening. I was listening to myself!

Did anyone else observe that he looks like Albert Einstein?

A wise man. I believe what he says is pertinent to all relationships including couples. I have lived with someone for fourteen years and he never talks about himself or asks me any questions about my life or opinions. It is bizarre, and difficult. I have learned to live with it as he is a good person, but I know I will never accept it and will continue to endeavour trying to have meaningful conversations.

Instead if trying to find myself, maybe I should be looking for myself in others. Listening, understanding others, and being humble...there's a lot that we can learn from this speach he made. In today's world communication has been getting hard, but people like him leaving strong messages, help us reconnect with each other. It's an honar to come across this video.

a very kind wise grandpa.

I love his ideas about cultural centers. Using social media to generate and encourage actual sociability is ironically brilliant. Hotels that encourage people to expand their own experiences

Theodore is an example of why it is desirable for elderly old souls to stick around, to live long, long lives, providing perspective to the young ones (some of whom are old souls), helping them to create replacements for current societal systems. He may or may not realize that learning from the past includes what we have learned from an Akash of hundreds or thousands of lifetimes. That wisdom is the old soul advantage. Understanding and wisdom of current reality is the elderly advantage.

........ THIS GENTLEMAN MAKES A LOT OF GOOD SENSE! THANK YOU FOR BEING AN INTELLIGENT EXPLORER! .......

I LOVED this TEDx Talk! It really touched my heart. Thank you Mr. Zeldin and Tedx Talks

It is just amazing. He managed to cover all the questions that I ve been asking myself. Wow

Communication technology is awesome. I love to get to know people from another part of the globe who has completely different background and yet share the same way of experiencing life. Thank you for sharing this talk. Much appreciated.

Love! World became so preoccupated for herself that the other one disappears from the landscape. This man has love and humbleness. May God bless him! May God bless us and forgive us all and help us change into good God's humans!

He has such a beautiful heart! I align deeply with everything he is saying. It's making more sense now about why I feel such a struggle to connect with people. I really don't enjoy small talk and shallow conversations about unimportant subjects. It's interesting how many comments are about his looks when his message is about listening and discovering the truth

The title is off, yet still relevant. I came here expecting something else but I am so glad I stayed to listen. Beautiful message. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

Mindful listening opposed to mind-full listening! Just waiting for the other person to finish their sentence/statement so you can input your own thoughts/opinion. Be patient, understanding, ask more questions for further understanding as to why someone has a particular opinion or view on a subject. Be mindful of where you are in the world and who you're speaking with so you don't impose your will on others. Share thoughts not demands! Great talk! I always enjoy sitting at the feet of an elder sharing knowledge and wisdom when they speak. I wish you well, all of you reading this.

This is like listening to my grandpa and there are some really close similarities. I love this set up, it’s like being told something wise by your own family

THEODORE ZELDIN, I like listening to the sound of your voice. 🌻

Put the last part of this message on billboards all around the world!!✌️

Completely intrigued by this idea of social experience for new ways of creating work. I think we have finally reached a point we can start optimizing what each of us has to give to the world and refocus on what’s important - people, and what are work life looks like.

Here is a Ted with alot of wise and golden nuggets on the art of being human. A couple in this talk has to do with you and another person, not necessarily a romantic partner; that is the art of dialogue with another human being. And at the heart of that is mastering the art of listening. Not thinking of what you want to say as soon as you can, but of truly listening and asking the other for more elaboration, more story, more thoughts and ideas and feelings so you can understand this person even more. There is always more to discover in another person. Every person has a world within them (him/herself) and as Ted says in his talk, is far more interesting to learn more about than oneself, who by the way, you never can fully know. (I learned that lesson after years of psychoanalysis. While my analysis ended, my self-learning will continue for as long as I live.) Many pearls of wisdom you will find in this Ted Talk.

I love this man! Thank you

The guys a true genius! Simple thinking yet genius because we naturally like to complicate the most simple things. Go back to basics! His wisdom is so beautiful and heart warming. Thank you, sir!❤

The wizdom and calm of the elderly is unsurpassed

I very much agree. I have had that idea myself about work places and western work. I think we need to integrate our culture into our daily lives so we don't separate our lives into to blocks. I spend all my time with my mom because I want to know her most. Work cannot fullfill me in that way. We only live once- might as well actually live it! Thank you!

I love this talk! So important for ppl like me that appreciate the power of listening but don't always do it as well as we wish. Its not an easy talk to digest but give it all your attention to the very end. Its very worth it! :)

A fascinating talk and a refreshing point of view!

THANK YOU THEODORE !

On point!! We need to find new and meaningful activities for humans. May his ideas be grasped by many!! ❤️

I do respect his mind and love his soul.

What a beautiful conversation. It felt like he read my mind and told me exactly what I wanted to hear. Thank you.

I was driving my son to school. I saw at least 10 homeless people. Why can’t those people use their skills to live in our society? How does our society refuse them admittance? Why can’t there be other ways of living that aren’t mainstream? Why can’t community be allowed for them? What if we had a community center on land that teaches people to build Cobb houses from soil, straw, and water? And teach them to garden and grow their own food? Why does society demonize anyone who doesn’t choose to work within the standard 9 to 5? How can we change our thinking to see other new ways of living? Like the speaker said, we are the change, we either create or conform to something that is not feeding our souls. We all know it’s true but we go through the day surrounded by a host of unhappy people. I feel too many people have felt they had no other choice but to belong to something that they don’t even realize isn’t what they really need. We need society that nourishes the good in us, that promotes opportunities for us to build each other up, to create a social fabric that weaves everyone into the cloth. A quilt of all the diversity of life. We know that ancient rainforests have many types of life that creates stability, resilience. If one tree is attacked, the neighboring trees can lend assistance through the root system. We need those community roots. What we have now is individual trees planted on vast plains of isolation! Not good for forest survival, and likewise not good for us as humans. It takes more than a smile, a hug, a nod of approval, letting someone go first, or seeing all people as our brothers and sisters. But that is the mindset that can give us the strength to reinvent society based on a human cooperation model. I feel sustainable living in a collection of communities would be a good start. Give the beuracrats (sic), the vision to remove the obstacles, rules, that prevent us from changing our society. Convince the wealthy elites that they can be part of the solution too. Stop all class, race, political divides. Don’t blame anyone for where we are as a society. That like telling a story from one perspective and insisting that someone else sees it the same way. As people we all have ideas that can create the comfortable social conditions. And yes, I agree we have to be willing to be fearless instead of fearful. To risk looking silly or making mistakes or questioning either inside our own conscience or questioning others in a questioning way. Not to try to change another person’s mind through force, but by giving others the food for thought they need to grow in understanding. Because I agree, the more we understand others, the more misconceptions we can remove from our own thinking and the more refined we become in pursuing the changes we need. Long winded comment. But hopefully not a lot of hot air!

So I think knowing facts and understanding each other s problems too helps us a lot and most importantly everyone s problems..thank you for giving this opportunity

TRULY AMAZING ADVICE ❤️

I wish I could listen to your longer. Brilliant

This talk gives me logical reasons to challenge social anxiety. Thanks Theo.

I already loved this one after the first few seconds

my god,he really has a pioneers spirit! Im inspired :)

Humans can only feel 2 emotions. Fear and Love. Every phobia, behavioural disorder and Neurosis is a manifestation of fear or a direct experience of fear. Once your fear subsides all that remains is love.

The art of really listening. Love ❤️ it!

Thank you for sharing your wise words and efforts to make this world become a more tolerant and better one. I really appreciate your caring, human and inspiring words.

incredible. thank you.

I believe he used a perfect word ‘couple, as a replacement for ‘’harmonious productive communication between two persons no matter how they are,, perfect

I love this. Thank you.

Simply beautiful ! I totally agree, let’s make space for one another and create opportunities ! If we all moved with love the world would be such a better place. This gentleman touched on things that would reduce mental health issues significantly

im here to learning English and glad find your video and your good and clear sound as i lesten and also learn that is important to listen to each other espicialy in that world's social media no time for others

I love this man so much

i liked his line of avoiding fear by "selling opportunity insurance rather than catastrophic insurance".

Loved his chair! It was like a professor doing the Ronnie Corbett story bit

I love this setting. I love how comfy and relaxed it is.

I love this man!!

Excellent points.

What a sweet sharing!

I would say that for me the most difficult thing it's not having a relationship, but starting one

We need to discover the memories of others.... That will cause intimate moments which will then relate to the title.... This is like a key 🗝️

Brilliant Theodore. Thank you x I would. love to travel and chat more x Just need more time 🤓

A great reminder. Thank you. 😊

Blessed!

Bravo! Great full!

My whole life is revolving around making a life beautiful and positive around ! My guy tries to talk and listen to my emotional subjects and it’s great that we try and that’s how 12 years of love is going on ... I hope blessings and humility from u all too x

Thank you!

Wonderful talk, thank you, I love this, yes fear,is a disabler.

I really liked this talk. I thought it was interesting. But the title is very misleading, when It mentions it’s going to be about a couple‘s relationship. Although, I can easily in for that what he means is that couple should listen to each other more. Which is perfectly sound. Also, I would’ve love to hear his thoughts on how we can actually be better listeners. As a psychologist myself, I have learned skills such as active listening and listening to understand, and have improved greatly over the last few years. But as a constant learner I would’ve love to hear how he keeps his mind engaged while listening to another human being.

Dealing with Fear... A very useful and ingenious concept. He talks about evolution of human thought to help in the job market.

Yeah, a relationship is learning the other's language.

Oh MY. Definitely going to need to watch this a few more times so I can chew on it.

Damm i almost cried what a beautiful soul, a Lot of learning!

A healthy brain can accept new ideas @ any age. Fear doesn't allow us to be creative. Work better be based on being in harmony with human & nature needs.

Beautiful talk

Extraordinary Mind 🙏

You can only truly know yourself through others♡

Very interesting talk! Thank you very much!!

Since i have discovered God , i felt really free. Free from fear, overall. God made me a better listener and give more attention to others,have real interest in listening and helping others. Less egoist. More empathic. Made me concentrate on the needs of others without losing myself. God is love and puts balance in everything ,making things right.

Love the Message,! Reinventar