That comes up a lot. Some exposures for that include telling someone you’re anxious or exaggerating the physical symptom of anxiety that you experience. If it’s sweating you’re concerned about, you can splash water on yourself. Or run in place and then go talk to someone.
@glow2490 Жыл бұрын
What about the fear of being anxious & shaking in front of someone or freezing up?
@wardahshahid2758 Жыл бұрын
😄
@glow2490 Жыл бұрын
@Alenabell Road to 70 subs! Right, that's why I'm asking about that specific one. I know what it means. 😊
@oFancys Жыл бұрын
Likewise :(
@sergiomendoza33047 ай бұрын
My core fears are being judged by others and then leading to rejection/being alone and seen as a loser/weird. Thanks for the great video!
@bhumikayady57397 ай бұрын
Sameeee 😢
@dijanazdrnja39977 ай бұрын
Same
@UrMom-69426 ай бұрын
Me too man. Hang in there
@EmergingForward4 ай бұрын
Yeah I relate. Sometimes it helps me to say to myself "It's none of my business what others think of me."
@susanhampton9671Ай бұрын
We are all judged by people. You are not alone. Don't reject yourself first. Work on your core concepts. Ask if what you are thinking is a fact. What is the proof?
@akashverma5756 Жыл бұрын
Even thinking about these exercises makes me anxious.
@j.r.18235 ай бұрын
I find them a bit much/ overwhelming as well. Much "smaller" situations would already trigger my anxiety enough... I think it's ok if we go slow and also adjust some exercises, to make them less intimidating. Or choose other, a bit less scary actions that would help us step out of our comfort zones. You're not alone!
@user-vp7wv5lk1u3 ай бұрын
@jessicaras4540except he won’t respond
@TatchaiBunmas2 ай бұрын
that's a good sign then. means you'll grow from it
@missoctober8859 Жыл бұрын
My social anxiety is worse around certain types of people. Anyone else relate?
@drali Жыл бұрын
I’d say that’s very common with social anxiety. Certain people can feel more safe while others seem like more of a threat.
@Tunlence Жыл бұрын
@@drali So true. Especially if a certain person or group of people makes you feel inferior, intimidated.
@garbrah180 Жыл бұрын
I really relate to this. I've been trying to put myself in environments with people I feel afraid of. Maybe I'll give these exercises a try.
@krisha5750 Жыл бұрын
I also have the same problem..I am so anxious around my relatives as I don't meet them on the daily basis..I really hope that one day I can be free from this 'social anxiety '
@0FFICERPROBLEM Жыл бұрын
Yes, kids and older people I'm more comfortable around, it's much worse with like young adults, around my age
@amandavaldegas7500 Жыл бұрын
My issue stems from my habit of reading too much into body language and social cues. If I’m feeling good and confident and approach someone, and they look visibly uncomfortable or nervous I can’t help but shut down and it gets awkward very fast where I want to run away 😅 this comes to play more with people in a romantic scenario or people that are not as open or enthusiastically friendly with me. The sense of comfort is needed for me to navigate these situations.
@AJ-qb1sx Жыл бұрын
just wanted to say you’re beautiful haha
@donatello948211 ай бұрын
@@AJ-qb1sx thanks bro
@paperchasindude65786 ай бұрын
I’m exactly the same way
@j.r.18235 ай бұрын
That's interesting. For me it's usually the opposite. When someone I approach seems nervous, it can help make me feel more confident, because it puts me in the "stronger" position. I usually have more issues when people come across as very confident, that can trigger my insecurities. (Even though, lately, as I have been learning a lot about narcissism, I learned that the people who seem overly confident oftentimes actually have a very fragile ego and knowing that helps me.)
@aliseyar4908 Жыл бұрын
My biggest fear is loneliness. I’ve lost friends last couple years. They were really close to me. It broke my heart so much, then consequently i feel i have to be funny to my friends and i crate clown mask. End of the day i would say this is not me, i’m not happy with current me. I want to be myself even i feel sad and lonely.
@TOMB0I_1020 Жыл бұрын
♥️♥️♥️♥️u
@fabiolisha Жыл бұрын
I feel you
@harivamshivallamkonda927 Жыл бұрын
I feel the same
@imtiazadar5475 Жыл бұрын
Same
@susanhampton9671Ай бұрын
I'm sorry for your losses. Please have at least one friend you can be your true self. Journal your tough feelings out. It may help you feel better. Look at the the 10 cognitive distortions.
@oldrap16 Жыл бұрын
Binging your videos and crying because it is such a relief to hear someone validate and articulate what I experience nearly every day. I would love to try some of the exposures but unfortunately the stakes and in turn, the fears are doubled because I live in a country where I'm not fluent in the language yet.
@anniesoernym Жыл бұрын
Maybe asking strangers to take a picture of you would be doable for you? You'd just seem like a tourist who knows at least _some_ of the language, which is something natives tend to be quite appreciate of. You also don't need to know the language to wear something funny/strange in public! (For me personally, though, that would still be harder, because I am uncomfortable with being looked at for an extended amount of time 🥴)
@oldrap16 Жыл бұрын
@@anniesoernym You're so sweet thank you so much for the ideas! I absolutely hate having my photo taken but I could ask for directions or something like that. Wearing something strange would definitely be a HUGE challenge for me because I already feel like people are looking at me and judging me constantly. It would be my nightmare but maybe that means it's a good thing to try :)
@faisalarghandiwal7508 Жыл бұрын
Try TRE exercises. I've got healed by this amazing thing
@anshulagarwal7069 Жыл бұрын
Same here
@venkateshgowda7853 Жыл бұрын
Same here
@RyanScarbrough Жыл бұрын
I'm afraid people will think I'm anxious and make them anxious. Then when they become anxious I become even more anxious. It's so sad. 🙁
@aylinm.35896 ай бұрын
samee
@mueezyasir21 сағат бұрын
The way to break out this cycle to accept your anxiety for what it is rather seeing it as a pest. Anxiety isn't contagious btw
@suqarlatte8691 Жыл бұрын
My core fear I think is people judging me for who I am, how I act and what I look like. I’m scared that in someone’s eyes I’m not good enough..? And that I’ll be rejected and left alone in all situations, although I do love being alone a lot of the times in my life. But Idk..
@ZeCahliPreppingGroupInBio Жыл бұрын
Same same same 😪
@triciasmith23055 ай бұрын
Me too.
@ocdandanxiety Жыл бұрын
Love this! The more we face uncertainty and doubt and respond differently to it, the more confident and less anxious we become! 👍
@drali Жыл бұрын
Well said!
@Jayrome32122 күн бұрын
Wearing my anxiety on my face in social settings was a big struggle I had for many many years. Since I was a teenager. I can overcome it sometimes but sometimes it creeps up unannounced
@Victory632197 ай бұрын
I have struggled with mental illness and my mental health since I was a kid. Before I even knew what those terms were. After years of depression, anxiety, and even an attempt to take my life, I never thought I would be able to live without psych medications. I clung to them because it was the only thing that made my mind quiet, but it also made me a zombie. Microdosing has given me control of my mental health for the first time, and they essentially gave me my life back.
@ohmakure47167 ай бұрын
The Trips I've been having really helped me a lot. I’m now able to meditate and I finally feel in control of my emotions and my future and things that used to be mundane to me now seem incredible and full of nuance on top of that I'm way less driven by my ego and I have alot more empathy as well
@dilara41307 ай бұрын
I was having this constant, unbearable anxiety due to work stress. Not until I came across a very intelligent mycologist. He saved my life honestly
@dilara41307 ай бұрын
His name is *DR Adolf Petter*
@ryancihet5557 ай бұрын
@ohmakure4716 I feel the same way too. I put too much on my plate and it definitely affects my stress and anxiety levels. I am also glad to be a part of this community.
@aydin62197 ай бұрын
@@dilara4130Does he deliver to various locations?
@weykzo72556 ай бұрын
when i hear about these exercises i want to burst out crying
@weykzo72556 ай бұрын
like literally..it literally happened to me not a while ago
@natatattfulАй бұрын
Same
@j.r.18235 ай бұрын
I don't like video calls and talking to strangers can make me feel uncomfortable and insecure. I'm very proud of myself that I managed to chat with all of my sons teachers per video call for parent teacher conferences this week anyways! I was worried about moments of awkward silence or that I would come across as nervous or stumbling over my words/ saying weird things. But none of this really happened and I managed to stay pretty connected and even had some moments where I enjoyed the conversation. 😊
@Roseisinspired7 ай бұрын
The biggest thing keeping people with social anxiety is often their mindset. These tips will actually help you, if you think the whole world is just judging only you, then you're wrong. I used to suffer from extreme SA and the only way I got rid of it was once a few years ago by drinking then eventually exposure to the things I was afraid of... It's not easy because it's a battle within yourself. SA is very hard to overcome when it's at it's strongest, but you have to be comfortable with being judged, and realizing at the end of the day you are completely normal, if not it's ok to be different. You must get to a point of being tired of being afraid that you will do anything to be normal. Accepting your anxiety and overcoming it is powerful, you need to be vulnerable in order to be strong sometimes. It's not a weakness or something to be ashamed of, you have to see yourself as a strong person for dealing with such a scary negative human emotion, and once you overcome it, you will feel stronger than most people.
@aylinm.35896 ай бұрын
You're so right. Just now in this season of my life social anxiety is at its peak, I think it was never this bad actually. So much that even a coworker talked to me about it and then I told her about my struggles. I think she told some other people for my sake because now they all want to talk to me and they're all extremely nice so like you said I think you have to be vulnerable and I want to be able to talk about it and for people to understand, especially when being anxious makes me seem rude and uncaring. I'm also trying to overcome by challenging myself and some things are harder than others but I know ultimately I'm safe. Anyway God bless you and have a great weak 🥰
@mydanny6523Ай бұрын
Thanks for advice, I need hear this 🙌
@drali Жыл бұрын
In case you’re wondering, Mario Kart DS is my favorite version.
@B00s3 Жыл бұрын
I was wondering, my favorite is the SuperNES version. The nostalgia I get from that game is great.
@mnemoh11 ай бұрын
Thank you. I did the core fear exercise and discovered (although I deep down already knew) that my core fears are that people will not accept me and I'll suffer consequences for being an outcast. I realize that living in my fear will inevitably push people away and my fears will come true and the cycle continues with me being more afraid. I think for me, instead of always thinking about what other people are thinking about me, I need to do the things I value doing and be the person who I want to be.
@kman_3411 ай бұрын
100%, same here
@harristytydawg3 ай бұрын
My fear is being judged. I didn’t use to be like this but moving to a different state in your early 20’s trying to make friends and having people ghost you with no reasoning you start to wonder if something is wrong with you. If you wonder enough, you actually start believing something is wrong with you which is what happened.
@powerviolentsАй бұрын
felt this, i haven’t moved but most of my old pals won’t return calls or texts. if they *do* end up answering, it’s always a no or “i’ll let you know” (obvs i never hear back).
@rebeccaaherrn3397 Жыл бұрын
The issue with exposure for me is not about actually trying them, but how to handle the consequences or the extreme cringe or awkwardness that follows. For instance, the scenario in a cafe, where if I order a coffee, and later tell them that I wanted a tea instead. What if they say no. Or what if they react rudely.
@kumaresank4630 Жыл бұрын
Hey.. those are just examples. You should try on your own fears
@levimark5489 ай бұрын
@@kumaresank4630As far as I understood, she wrote, that the consequences are actually her fear. So if she should try on her own fears it wouldn't be an example anymore 🤷🏻♂️ Would be helpful if you have some ideas how to handle such situations ?
@DobbyAFreeElf0121 күн бұрын
Ive always been to myself growing up but now at 23 i really am regretting not socialising at a earlier age. Its getting out of hand and to the point where its starting to affect my child and others in my life, i find it hard just trying to leave the house for something as important as food for my kid. I know its all in my head but its hard to be in public and not think people are watching your every move
@daviddimalanta259 Жыл бұрын
Core fear I had are shame, trauma from family-related issues and autism-related violence. It's also difficult especially in dating life and making new friends. Thoughts I might think for the worse includes getting arrested for saying a wrong word or harassment.
@hereverydayadventure7 күн бұрын
You had me at “Exercises you can do on your own to combat social anxiety.” Because that means I don’t have to be around people to work on my fear of being around people 😅
@uttercolor18 күн бұрын
My problem with this for me is that intentionally lying about the context of a social interaction to people just to gauge their reaction adds a different layer of anxiety about being a bad person that's separate from my social anxiety. I mean if someone came up to me for help under false pretenses and i figured that out, i would not think too highly of them, i would feel used.
@nffc3309 Жыл бұрын
One of the things I struggle with the most is when I am in a silent room/environment. I start to focus on myself and my breathing and any sound I make such as loud breathing or even dropping a pen I feel like will draw lots of attention to me which I don’t like.
@drali Жыл бұрын
Makes total sense. A big part of all anxiety based problems is learning how to be less focused on what’s inside you and more on what’s outside. That’s difficult when there isn’t much going on out there. It might help to remember “oh this is what my brain does when I’m in a silent room, it magnifies what I’m doing and what’s happening inside.”
@nffc3309 Жыл бұрын
@@drali Thankyou for the reply! Your videos are really helping me and many others.
@myAPIcjourney Жыл бұрын
My core fear is being rejected and criticized. I think people think I am boring or have nothing important to say. I also fesr people misinterpreting the meaning of what im saying and then getting angry
@powerviolentsАй бұрын
i like how the rejection exercises section made me immediately tense up and feel an intense feeling of dread lol
@dreamer27744 ай бұрын
My biggest fear is that they will know I am weak and attack me... as it happened before. I feel like I always need to either become invisible or look scary/unapproachable and never make connections because that could also make me more vulnerable to them. Yeah, trauma-based fear of people is real.
@samdovels1234Ай бұрын
Most people are good and not out to harm you or judge you. Unfortunately, due to some negative experiences with evil people the anxiety sets in and doesn't differentiate between good and bad people.
@mueezyasir21 сағат бұрын
Go gym or do martial arts
@mueezyasir21 сағат бұрын
Go gym and do martial arts
@missflummadiddle18 күн бұрын
my core fear is being laughed at, people making jokes about me, being ignored and laughed at when I try to be serious or tell how I feel, and when I don't want to do something and refuse but other person is imposing so I give in but I feel resentful and bitter later on. I fear being assertive and that if I am not able to do that so people will make me their puppet to joke about. I don't fear being left alone, I fear being this puppet that has to come to her master on any command
@appythakre Жыл бұрын
Sometimes making conversations makes me feel tired than I feel on completing my 3km run
@TiftofDel Жыл бұрын
i feel same way
@Phoenix_75686 ай бұрын
One thing that helped me was just doing stuff alone, like going to a coffee shop or a movie. I’ve even been to a concert alone. Had a great time with myself and I wasn’t anxious 🙂🤘
@Sixty0h4 Жыл бұрын
I've found that my core fear is being unsuccessful. I feel like I've been alright so far, and I guess I don't want to mess that up.
@drali Жыл бұрын
That's understandable. If you haven't had much experience with setbacks that feel like a failure, those experiences can be scary.
@nicholascosta4242Ай бұрын
this hit home. i work sales and referals are supposed to be a good thing, i only meet clients once because if i make a good impression than im nervous that i have to live up to that again. your videos always hit different.
@micilovesami Жыл бұрын
I embarrasse myself daily, it will be hard to beat it :,) I have discovered your channel yesterday, it helps a lot, especially coming from someone who has been in our shoes. Thank you so much for sharing so many things with us!
@Striving_soulz Жыл бұрын
I want to do this to defeat my ego and do more exposure especially in social situations. Do you think embarrassing yourself has helped you learn more ?
@hannahjoy48572 ай бұрын
My social anxiety feels worst after I spend a great day with people I know love me the most in the world, but at night I lie awake wondering whether one little thing I said was the wrong thing. I'm afraid people don't actually like me and that I'm being talked about behind my back.
@anniesoernym Жыл бұрын
What makes me really uncomfortable about some of the excercises you proposed is that by doing them I would be inconveniencing other people. I'm not sure that's something I should do 😕
@ErebosGR Жыл бұрын
Yeah, some of them seem like pulling pranks on people just so you can feel better...
@drali Жыл бұрын
People bring up that concern a lot. Something to remember is people with social anxiety have a MUCH lower threshold for what is considered inconveniencing someone. Most people who have it think nearly any request they make of someone else is an inconvenience. That being said, usually there are versions of these you can do that are bringing about the attention on yourself and also don’t inconvenience anyone. For example, dressing up in embarrassing clothing doesn’t hurt anyone else. Playing a guitar in public doesn’t. Neither does asking someone to take your photo. They’re all just part of living in a socially connected community.
@anniesoernym Жыл бұрын
@@drali_"Most people who have [social anxiety] think nearly any request they make of someone else is an inconvenience."_ Oh! Well, if that doesn't describe me to a T 😅🙈
@drali Жыл бұрын
Takes one to know one :-)
@gaborkiss1425 Жыл бұрын
@@drali "Something to remember is people with social anxiety have a MUCH lower threshold for what is considered inconveniencing someone." Excellent point here, never thought of that this way :O
@CommunityChannel659 күн бұрын
That is pretty specific stuff, thank you.
@joerenner1649 Жыл бұрын
My biggest fear it getting taken advantage of and the humiliation of being taken advantage of
@rubin-healmysocialanxiety702 Жыл бұрын
This is a big one brother. Have you had this fear for a long time?
@AviationPilot91 Жыл бұрын
So great to know that I'm not alone, though, it seems everyone else who experiences this are online.
@j.r.18235 ай бұрын
Most people are just more comfortable expressing their anxieties online, it's so much easier than showing that side of yourself in real life. Trust me, there are a lot of people with such issues everywhere around in real life too. Some people are very good at hiding it, but lots of people have mental struggles, in one way or another, including anxiety. You're definitely not alone.
@1bcordell8 ай бұрын
What sucks is that I want to get better, but I absolutely do not want to go into public and expose myself in an embarrassing way. This is what makes me feel so stuck. These kind of tips really make me feel like I am doomed to be an outcast the rest of my life.
@Untouched777 ай бұрын
You dont have to do that. I was scared to go into grocery stores and pay but ive taught myself to do that, making my anxiety better, and i didnt do anything embarassing. just do things youre scared of, small steps at a time
@davidwhitcher19724 ай бұрын
I don't connect to people ever. I could speak to someone all evening and in the end feel nothing for them.
@kirsten78838 ай бұрын
I’m going to try to ask more people how they feel about me and my social skills in group settings as this is where I feel most socially anxious.
@monigiselle21408 ай бұрын
I was doing the exercise, and I have a few core beliefs fears like a combination of rejected, embarrassed, and criticized.
@matthewnaldzin4642 Жыл бұрын
thank you for the video Dr. Ali. I am really enjoying your videos about SAD. I guess my hesitation or lack of motivation is that I think I am more comfortable being socially anxious than doing any of the CBT techniques discussed. I just don't want to pull other people into my struggle and ruin their day.
@drali Жыл бұрын
Glad you’ve found these videos helpful! For motivation it’s totally fine if someone doesn’t want to change the current situation. To clarify this you could make a list of things you currently like about your social anxiety. Next you can make a list of things you like less about it. Then rank 0-10 how much you want to change it now. If this is a time you’re happy with the way things are and motivation is low, that makes total sense and don’t put any pressure on yourself to make a change you don’t want to or need to. If your fear is about ruining someone else’s day by doing any of these things, that is definitely a part of social anxiety. Most people who don’t have social anxiety, while they might not seek out these types of situations, would be able to do them and not worry that they have ruined someone’s day. And if that is a big concern for you, focus on the exercises that have less of an impact on someone else. You could wear something embarrassing, play a guitar in public, write a typo, ask someone to take your photo. All of these things are normal parts of living in a community.
@user-jx6uc7sc3l22 күн бұрын
Always afraid of saying the wrong thing
@noorjahanmansoori5628 Жыл бұрын
When i try sharing thoughts , no one listens to me. That's my fear of going unheard
@MapleWorldd Жыл бұрын
Your tips are unique and exactly what i've been looking for. these tips give me anxiety yes, but also give me hope :) at least I learned that these situations do happen in real life and it's normal and it's fine! thank u so much, Dr. Ali.
@vifren902411 ай бұрын
All these are excelent exercises. I have overcame it for the most part but when I get away from social situations it comes back. The only positive things is that I know for sure how to overcome it now. Its just time and effort but its easier as I know that its possible.
@foramthakkar1017 Жыл бұрын
Yeah ! I also feared of myself in socialising feel like I'm a weirdo and but got enough of attention in my school life to a anxious person is a bliss and sin itself . Want to cope up soon otherwise it's dangerous to yourself , pain is inevitable but misery is optional. Simple thing be kind to yourself .
@nastyapentegova16 күн бұрын
My main fear that people will sense how miserable I am and that I’m useless and that people will judge me because how I’m unconfident is
@echo5435 Жыл бұрын
For every exercise you said my brain just went: "but they'll be madddd"
@GunShyGymnast Жыл бұрын
Yes! Like…how do you get out that situation gracefully? Like…how many times do you ask to see Mr.Dunkin?
@samdovels1234Ай бұрын
Exactly! It's not even fair... Why should I make people wait at an ATM...? But we need to get the point of it, not every example works for everyone.
@decod5rАй бұрын
The rejection exercises sound good im going to try them out thank you
@kulsoomashraf2190 Жыл бұрын
Hi Doctor Ali Mattu ! My anxiety stems from the fact that I don't articulate myself well. I end up being misunderstood so often that I feel lazy correcting people.
@pradnyakadam733611 ай бұрын
I have similar challenges
@peetabread171 Жыл бұрын
I have become very interested in politics the last few years. One thing that helped me last summer was petitioning! I had to ask hundreds of people if they wanted to "sign my petition so my candidate can get on the ballot in November". It took my out of my comfort zone and with my main core fear being rejection, it helped me practice that too. I definitely had people tell me no, I also had people who asked questions and I didn't know how to answer. It was amazing exposure therapy and it always felt so good afterwords. Petitioning is great too because you still feel a sense of accomplishment. even if I had 100+ rejections I still got many that said "yes". My advice, even if you don't like politics, find a local independent political party that needs help collecting signatures . the exposure to rejection, criticism, and embarrassment are real but it's so rewarding to have the accomplishment of collecting signitures AND facing your fear
@michaelb22797 ай бұрын
Thank you for stepping up to help someone run for office!
@missflummadiddle18 күн бұрын
maybe I will try doing a survey but even making normal shopping in small store makes me anxious☠️ so I think I will start with buying stuff more often, also thanks for this video I hope I will be able to do those excercises in the future
@TigerMeow-zg3nf2 ай бұрын
My favourite exercise is to ask the places which I do intentionally and speaking to public. Thank you so much sir, it really works and I try level best to do all the exercises listed here. Thanks ❤🎉
@jay_thebroker6 ай бұрын
Doing dares does not make me anxious but its the one on one conversations when i need to talk about myself … it makes me sweat soo bad and i look so anxious no matter how hard i try to fight it
@Nature-zu3tc Жыл бұрын
This guy is a genius. I got this, I mean we got this. Let’s gooo
@haonyoass9556 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for the social anxiety videos. Thank you so much
@drali Жыл бұрын
Thank you for your kind comment!
@fyr3st0rm65 Жыл бұрын
my core fear is... people thinking i'm too angry all the time
@YourGuideToSelfLove10 ай бұрын
These tips were actually very helpful thank you. I know other creators say that confidence is key which it is but sometimes you don’t feel confident all the time and want real answers. Definitely will be implementing these tips.
@mghtwehtwemg867415 күн бұрын
of course, the ways the ideas you have explained here are really a SUPER HELPFUL INFORMATION DR. Than you so much. With Best Wishes.
@DriveFastEatGrass5 ай бұрын
first step to cure your anxiety. Do what makes you anxious.
@lauraoshiro689710 ай бұрын
This video is great!! But if anyone tries to follow up every single tip that is given (those practical exercises), that person is actually gonna end up being hated 😅 😂 But I feel good after watching this, it's nice to see people who have been through the same problem giving tips and solutions, cause I often feel lost and can't find a way out of this
@STO7rides6 күн бұрын
I'm suffering from social anxiety like more than a 3years idk what was going on with me now i know what's going on so I'm still fighting for it& i have never done job till now so one day i go in job i keep going for like a week and that time i used to smoke stuff so at the 6th day of work i smoke at my break time & that time my anxiety become so high i leave my job but i feel proud at some point i try to do even when it was draggin me so much it was really worst & still it is... every seconds was feeled like I'm surviving..
@christina6656 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for bringing this subject to light. So many people have no idea what social anxiety is! They just think it's being withdrawn and shy. I became aware of my social anxiety about 2 years ago. I've lived with social anxiety pretty much my entire life. Its been completely crippling at times. I've had so many big dreams smothered by the likes of social anxiety. I've been working with a therapist for the past year or so but I just don't feel like I'm getting much out of it anymore. I need more help with social anxiety specifically and talking about my feelings and my week isn't cutting it. Not to say it hasn't helped me but I feel like I need something different, something more targeted. Do you have any suggestions? I would love to find a Doctor with your level of experience in this matter.
@drali Жыл бұрын
Glad the video was helpful! Try looking here (services.abct.org/i4a/memberDirectory/index.cfm?directory_id=3&pageID=3282) and here (members.adaa.org/page/FATMain) for a therapist that does this type of treatment.
@imaginareality Жыл бұрын
Of all the examples in this video, the one that really made me cringe was going up to a stranger and greeting them as if I know them. I think one of my fears is to get something that should be obvious wrong and then embarrass myself. I get really anxious when I have to wish people a happy birthday (because what if I got the date wrong?) or when I have to by a bus ticket from the bus driver (what if I pronounce the name of the bus stop wrong and/or get on the wrong bus?). Also, two years ago I had a garden and barely used it because it made me really anxious to think about being observed while in my garden (what if I mow the lawn in a weird way or do something else that's wrong?).
@tigerfordinner Жыл бұрын
Instead of greeting strangers, start with a smile. I started to practise smiling and its really giving me benefits. Try smiling all the time whether you feel like it or not. Its a very gentle smile on the lips, not forcing much. Your brain releases feel good hormones when you practise it.
@outstandishing11 ай бұрын
This video was so helpful! What I've noticed with myself is that all of these exercises, particularly for rejection or embarrassment, I would feel 100% more confident doing them if I had a friend with me who I'm very comfortable around. I wonder what to make of that...
@onestarhunter1 Жыл бұрын
Hey, just discovered your channel. Thank you for your work, I wish you had more views! I've found so many answers to my questions
@drali Жыл бұрын
Impact is worth more than views 😎 Thanks for being part of the community!
@zachkuvinka29689 ай бұрын
Just lost my gf primarily to this. Killing the vibe in public always scared to be myself around new people. I truly hope this videos helps me solve my problem and learn to live a better way of life.
@lynnetnjokiwainaina44928 ай бұрын
My Core fear is been Judged by other people I never had Social Anxiety I just developed it by been isolated from people.
@sallybutler10058 ай бұрын
I think lockdown caused mine.
@KFB__9 ай бұрын
I'm anxious about being anxious in front of people! Its hard for me to stay socially connected and I often feel trapped or overwhelmed. When the discussion turns to me, I really panic. I struggle to concentrate and stay on conversation. I just want to run off and be alone. I was once a social Butterly and thrived in social situations. I don't know what has happened to me.
@allievlogs4907 ай бұрын
same might not be the same for you butI i used to be a social butterfly as well and did not care ab peoples feedback I actually enjoyed awkardness in other people bc it showed their authenticity and quickly knew how to reverse the convo and make it feel comfortable. After some tramautic experiences , losing friends and being in high school really changed the way I perceived myself and made it 10x harder to communicate with peers and join conversations almost feeling like im frozen
@sabrinaihh6 ай бұрын
This is exactly me! I was once, a few years ago, THE personality in the room and always felt super confident but over the past couple years I have been struggling with self doubt and have dug my way into this hole, wondering how I got here. Some days its easier than others, but when its bad I just feel so awful and trapped.
@KFB__6 ай бұрын
@@sabrinaihh I'm sorry to hear that. It's a horrible place to be, and a vicious cycle! I hope it gets better.
@joelgarcia3907 Жыл бұрын
I love this guy. Thank you for helping us all out
@lulubo196312 күн бұрын
today i did one of your advices i went to someone in the gym and inasked her a question i was so anxious but i did it😂
@flymypg Жыл бұрын
"Make friends with it". Yes, indeed. When I was a newly graduated and hired engineer, I was immediately given higher-level responsibilities because I had worked my way through college while working part-time at that company. I had received so much support and flexibility there, that it directly contributed to my academic success (as did the pay, as I was an independent student). I had to present my designs in Design Review meetings, where peers and management would review my work and offer suggestions. To me, these "suggestions" felt like rejection, harsh criticism, attacks even. A huge change compared to the pre-graduation relationship. My anxiety and stress raged. I began visibly sweating, fidgeting and exhibited many of the other signs of panic. Finally, in one meeting, unable to contain myself further, I broke down and started "ugly crying". My boss took me aside and gently helped us both understand what was going on, and what we could do about it. The underlying cause was clearly my warped perception of what absolutely was very constructive criticism. This was before I started to receive effective treatment for my depression, so I was dealing with that as well. I was basically a crunchy depressed core within a fluffy anxiety wrapper. The conversation took me to a very simple place. Before interacting with ANYONE on a professional basis, I'd repeat a simple mantra: "I NEED feedback to succeed. I LOVE criticism!" This put me in a near-ideal receptive listening state, encouraging me to "lean in" to the criticism, to try to obtain all I possibly could from the interaction. This change in perspective triggered an enormous change in my professional demeanor and conduct. In particular, it encouraged me to go the extra mile when delivering my own feedback, making me a much better collaborator. The anxiety was still there, deprived of its power, though it did still serve to keep me on my toes! Friends with criticism? Sure. Then it turned into a superpower.
@rubin-healmysocialanxiety702 Жыл бұрын
This is great! Get to what's fueling the social anxiety underneath ❤
@SubhalaxmiGarg4 ай бұрын
I am quite introvert . I don't why it makes me shy when I face guests or talking to strangers. Even it has become difficult talking to relatives😢but I talk with my friends and parents without any fear. I will try these tips
@chiwizard116 ай бұрын
excellent video, thanks for taking us through the process
@samuelmyllyaho6066 Жыл бұрын
The anxious picture looks more confident XD. anyway, your content sure means a lot to people. Be proud!
@danielmoore9214 Жыл бұрын
I prefer this style of solution oriented stuff 😃
@gurmita280 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much. Your content is so underrated!
@lotus832110 ай бұрын
Thank you so much....facing mind barriers intentionally with courage....thank you🙏
@asraf497 Жыл бұрын
Hi Dr.Ali I am a college student. My anxiety and fear is When I entering the other class When I meet a crowd and when I talking with girls How do I overcome?
@meganmorgan74912 ай бұрын
I think my core fear is I don’t like myself and I worry if I get rejected it just proves to myself that I’m not likable, not enough etc..
@yaboisartre58448 ай бұрын
11:05 if you freeze this frame it looks like he’s teaching people how to be a menace 😂😂
@user-jx6uc7sc3l22 күн бұрын
This causes me anxiety!
@nikola49863 ай бұрын
Thank you for the video! Great work!
@katerynasmyrnova4373 Жыл бұрын
thank you! Now I know a new word - selfsuiting!
@salma-amlas Жыл бұрын
My core fear is that I'm a coward. If i am a coward, i am afraid of standing up for myself, standing up for others, doing what's right. I am scared that people will know I am weak, which will reduce my value from their POV. Which means I will be worthless to them. All my achievements won't matter.
@jxp21Ай бұрын
1) 🍃 2) Don’t take too much
@sidpryor64693 ай бұрын
I have a major fear of not being good enough and being poor like majority of my family before me..!
@illumiNateX7 Жыл бұрын
Hey Ali, your favorite Facebook commenter here! Just an idea, I feel like your channel name should be more specific to what you do, like The Psych Show is what drew me in, but if I saw Doctor Ali I wouldnt exactly know what you do off the bat, and youtube is heavily visual with a lot of competition so you wanna stand out as clearly and quickly as possible! I know name changes are hard and very thought out, but i just wanted to voice my opinion on it. Either way I will stick around just trying to help you grow as much as possible brother, much love!
@drali Жыл бұрын
I def feel you on this. I loved "the psych show" but for years I've received feedback from other folks to shift over to Doctor Ali. Whenever I am in person no one used the name "the psych show" but they did always call me Doctor Ali. I also want this to be a channel that has lots of different 'show" formats - explainers, reactions, and reviews. The Psych Show sounded a bit more limiting there. Lastly, I'm diving more into mental health and less into broader psychology topics.
@illumiNateX7 Жыл бұрын
@@drali as I figured a lot of time and thought was put in, and I totally understand what you’re saying, and I can’t wait for the broader topics, I love the stuff you cover! Keep it coming brother 🙌🏼
@Neeteshsingh005 ай бұрын
Amazing i will definitely try these exercises
@nananakeson2 ай бұрын
I get anxious just thinking on the possibility that I asked out 5 different people, one of them accepts it and now I'm in a situation where I have to somehow explain to that person why I'm not interested😂😂
@DownDance3 ай бұрын
Well, the first question is already quite difficult to answer for me. I genuinely don't know what I'm afraid of. I don't even know anymore if I'm really socially anxious or if I'm just over exaggerating. Many symptoms seem to match, but many triggers seem to mismatch for me. For example I'm not afraid of being judged or seen anxious and I don't have problems looking someone (even strangers) into the eyes. Starting a conversation or joining one tho is IMPOSSIBLE. Most probably it's the fear of being rejected, but thinking about rejection doesn't really feel strong enough to power the anxiety. Idk anymore what my problem is; it's just exhausting being lonely and feeling like I couldn't do anything against it although I could and should.
@Escobar720 Жыл бұрын
Thank you but no thank you 😂 I’ll die if I do any of these
@kyokazuto9 ай бұрын
Same
@zimplezarah096 ай бұрын
My core fears are: abandonment and rejection. It always happened to me. It hurts that the people Itusted most chose to leave me and not to be part of their life anymore.
@shubhamgusain9454 Жыл бұрын
I have health anxiety but in anxiety I have sweating a lot and i focus more on it it cause my social anxiety because I thought if I sweat in front of them it really embrassing
@frankk91057 ай бұрын
Even imagining myself doing these exercises makes me anxious😭😭
@Neeteshsingh00Ай бұрын
Once my freind told me that you are look weird when you show face expression i think that hits in my mind and whenver i talk i have to show my face expression then i dont able to make eye to eye contact conversation and later i think this develops into social anxiety
@StandProudYouAreStrong5 ай бұрын
Being perceived is my biggest fear
@user-ww7ir1ml8m3 ай бұрын
Fear is getting caught in this paralyzing mental cycle of... "what do I say when all I think is what do I say...