These Tips Changed Our Marriage ⎮ How We Argue BETTER After A Horrible First Year
Рет қаралды 13,600
Күн бұрынNavigating the first year of marriage can be a mix of blissful moments and unexpected challenges. In this video we open up about the rocky start to our marriage and the valuable lessons we've learned. Join as we share the communication strategies and insights that transformed the way we argue, turning into a tool for growth and strengthening our bond.
💬 Marriage Real Talk:
Rough Beginnings: We get real about the struggles we faced in our first year and how it nearly broke us.
Turning Point: Discover the pivotal moments that prompted us to seek change and work on our relationship.
💡 Conflict Resolution Tips:
Active Listening: Learn how we developed the skill of truly listening to each other without immediately reacting.
Fair Fighting Rules: We'll share the 'rules of engagement' that keep our arguments constructive rather than destructive.
Emotional Intelligence: Find out how recognizing and expressing our emotions healthily has been a game-changer.
🛠️ Tools for Better Arguments:
Communication Techniques: We discuss the techniques that help us convey our thoughts and feelings clearly and calmly.
Time-Outs: See how taking a break during heated moments allows us to cool down and come back with a clearer perspective.
Seeking Help: We talk about the impact of seeking guidance from marriage counselors and how it provided us with effective tools for better arguments.
❤️ Strengthening Our Bond:
Empathy and Understanding: Discover how empathy has allowed us to connect on a deeper level during disagreements.
Rebuilding Trust: We share the steps we've taken to rebuild trust and ensure our arguments are resolved with respect and love.
💌 Chapters
0:00 getting defensive
2:00 trying to change my husband
3:15 validating our feelings
4:00 the moment I realized what he needed
4:45 what is the root need
6:10 tip one- look internally
8:20 our fight today
10:55 tip two- verbally process with a friend
12:15 our marriage dynamic
13:40 keeping Jesus at the center
14:45 connecting during an argument
📚 Our Love Story
Part 1 ⎮ • Our Love Story ⎮Met On...
Part 2 ⎮ • When God Writes Your L...
Engaged After 2 Months ⎮ • ENGAGED AFTER 2 MONTHS!
The Day I Met My Husband ⎮ • The Day I Met My Husba...
👍 Join Our Love Journey: If you find value in our story and the advice we offer, please like, subscribe, and hit the notification bell for more content on building a strong and healthy marriage.
Y O U T U B E
Kian ⇢ / kiantilton
Kyle ⇢ / @kylewolfgang
I N S T A G R A M
⇢ / kianwolfgang
⇢ / kylejasonwolfgang
⇢ / hallelujahsundayco
C O N T A C T
⇢ kiancollaboration@gmail.com
CHRISTIAN COUNSELING ▸ faithfulcounseling.com/kian
AMAZON FAVES ▸ www.amazon.com/shop/kiantilton
DSLR Camera ▸ amzn.to/2iuVCqb
⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯
Disclaimer: some links may be affiliate. #marriage #christianmarriage #marriageadvice
@StrongerThanStroke Ай бұрын
The number 1 reason for divorce is a spouse’s inability to change. You have both shown the ability to change and grow in understanding for each other and yourself, with this your marriage is going to get better and better ❤
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Wow amen change is inevitable if you want to grow! Thank you for your encouragement!
@cassidykowalski1869 Ай бұрын
YES please do a podcast together!!! Would love more like this and the longer the better!! (It's reminding me of the "For Us" podcast but dare I say better 🙈)
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Ahhh yay love your excitement! Going to be so much fun!!
@priscillamartinez8156 Ай бұрын
Agree 100 percent!
@sisternatalieandrade7293 Ай бұрын
Your transparency and vulnerability was such a blessing! Bless you both and your precious marriage!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Thank you so much!!
@ralieghhm Ай бұрын
So proud of you both!!! I’ve been following since before your wedding and I’ve gotten to watch you two grow SO much in faith and Love and allow Jesus to change you both so that your marriage is your ministry unto the Lord!!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Amen thank you! It’s been a journey but such a good one! So much healing, freedom, growth, revelation, unity, and love in such a short amount of time. Praise God for His steadfast love and faithfulness. He’s really done a great work in the both of us 🙌 thank you for all your support and encouragement! God bless you!
@therealsubaekhyang Ай бұрын
I was surprised and happy to see that you posted on here again!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Long time coming but we finally feel the Lord leading us back into it and are excited for what’s to come! Appreciate your love and support as we follow Him into this next chapter!
@mercyorbit9351 Ай бұрын
You guys have me laughing along with you. This sounds so much like me and my boyfriend. In talking with my mother and sisters in Christ, it seems like a common dynamic in a lot of relationships. That’s why it’s easy to laugh along because it’s part of the human experience and thank Jesus we can work on ourselves and relationships to make them work better. God bless y’all.
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Amen so good! God bless you!!
@suewolfgang5130 Ай бұрын
Kyle and Kian, I love how you two keep it so real as you share your experiences and your growth!!! So inspiring to witness Jesus continuing to transform both of your hearts!!! 🙌 Yes, the answer is always Jesus and validation is key!!! ✝️ Love and hugs!!! 🥰
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Momma wolf doing what she does best! We love you!! ❤
@jenniferthompson5146 21 күн бұрын
This is really special! You don’t see many couples talking about the hard times and how they got through it in such a vivid way, with examples and all! Super cool that you both are so self reflective. It’s good to know about these things, as someone hoping for marriage one day.
@KianandKyle 16 күн бұрын
Thank you so much! Praying blessings over you in Jesus name!
@valeriedoat Ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this! I was feeling anxious about my relationship yesterday and remembered the example of the triangle. It helped me direct my focus upon God, and the anxiety went away. Thank you for your openness. Please make more of these, they are so helpful.
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Amen so good! The triangle is such a powerful visual that’s helped us so much too! God bless you!
@worldwanderingwhittakers Ай бұрын
LOVE how REAL this is!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
❤️❤️❤️
@alejandra1601 Ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this!! My husband and I got married a few months ago and the majority of our arguments are so silly but they unfortunately blow out of proportion some times and it’s been hard. Watching this video has helped me know I’m not alone
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
You’re definitely not alone! We all go through it - the question is are we willing to take personal responsibility, bring it to the Lord, surrender, learn, and grow? If we are - the Lord will get us through it and it will be a beautiful process that will create testimonials to bring Him all the glory, honor, and praise - and lead us into a place of freedom, gratitude, and thanksgiving! Praying this over you guys in Jesus name!
@korahthompson8493 Ай бұрын
Same girl.
@darlaaddams7169 10 күн бұрын
Please continue this series!! These are very common issues and something every couple go through. Your commentary is so good. God bless you guys!
@JaeybeeMartinito Ай бұрын
a video, finally!! 🎉 about to listen while i work - God bless you guys! Holy Spirit, i pray that i will intake all that you want me to hear through Kian and Kyle 🤍
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Amen! We’ve missed you guys! We pray it blesses you!!
@iveelovee Ай бұрын
Anytime I see an upload from Kian and now this channel again 😭 I get excited because I get to watch them on my lunch 🥰
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
You're the best! We appreciate you!!
@Mayrows 29 күн бұрын
THIS IS THE BEST REALISTIC VIDEO I'VE SEEN.
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
🙌🙌🙌 thank you!!
@meganlonsdale8462 Ай бұрын
Love the vulnerability! Thank you guys for posting this❤️
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Glad you enjoyed it!!
@nicolesanchez1871 27 күн бұрын
Thank you guys for sharing this for other married couples who need guidance from people just like them. Thank you. May God continue to use you both and guide you.
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Amen praise God! So happy to hear they are making an impact and helping others!
@Viviii914 Ай бұрын
Was thinking about you two a few days ago and you’re back!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Wow so cool! Hope we didn’t disappoint 😜
@avalucia1828 Ай бұрын
Love this!! I would love to see more of these!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Yay! Thank you!
@angelavanoosten1 26 күн бұрын
So good!! I always love these videos 🤍 please keep them up forever lol I'll want to watch them again when I'm married
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Aw yay will do! So glad to hear they are blessing you!
@faithfitz Ай бұрын
podcast!!!! love this!!!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
🤗🤗
@Vessel_ofCHRIST7 Ай бұрын
Wow! I get so excited seeing you guys! Praise the Lord for growth, and your journey with him. This is such a blessing! This reminds me of the fig tree Jesus was frustrated with it and cursed it. So, we have so much power with our mouth to bring death and life. From what I understand, it’s better to not get frustrated with one another but to curse whatever it is that’s causing you to get angry. Wow! Give no legal ground to the enemy to disrupt the fruitfulness of your marriage! Jesus loves you more!!!🫶🏾🤍
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
AMEN!!! I love this! So good!!
@_xBrokenxDreamsx_ Ай бұрын
i believe that's called vasopressin bonding (teamwork). no need to take it personally just 'coz your teammate is frustrated and no need to be frustrated just 'coz your teammate takes it personally (basically you just need to get older and wiser and wait for the sex hormones that are making you crazy to die down).
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Haha so interesting thanks for sharing! I never heard that term before but makes sense! I'm sure time helps but we can also be intentional to speed up the process of vasopressin bonding. We got a long ways to go still, but Jesus has definitely been the catalyst to help us get to where we are currently at 👌
@taraleasure Ай бұрын
Maybe I’m reading into this, but I don’t think it’s wise to go to a friend and complain about your spouse. Even to just process with them about something that they did that annoyed you. I feel like the way we talk about our spouse to other people shapes the way they view your spouse. It kind of feels like gossip- like if someone did something that I thought was annoying, I would go directly to them and not talk about it with other people. Even better yet, take it to God and pray about it. Again, maybe I misunderstood but that’s how I took it. Great advice otherwise though!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Totally understand where you’re coming from but I think it depends how you go about it and who you go to. If you go to gossipers who aren’t trustworthy and don’t know the Lord and will talk bad about others, and you go just to gossip about someone (me in this instance), I’d agree wholeheartedly. Kian goes to God and also to the godly women He has brought into her life for help. The women she goes to for this are in our corner and she can trust them completely and she knows they are women who can speak life into her and our marriage. They will be there for her, pray for her, and help her to look internal after having a safe place to fully unload her feelings and emotions (or burdens) that are in the way. It’s not that she’s actually bad mouthing me or spreading gossip, rumors, or lies… it’s that she’s using the community God has blessed us with to help her navigate these emotions and grow in her true identity. It’s quite powerful when done right and in love with pure intentions and has been a powerful blessing in our marriage ¨̮
@BELOVEDBYJESUSTHESONOFGOD Ай бұрын
@@KianandKyleplus the word tells us to surround ourselves with wise council not to walk in the council of the ungodly
@bondwithchrist Ай бұрын
wow I literally missed yous so much!!!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Aw thanks! We missed you guys too!!
@Mamaforher Ай бұрын
Okay this needs to go viral 100% relatable
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Hahaha comeonnn 🙌 praise God for the work He has done and is doing! Appreciate your support as we continue to press in!
@AthenaOsborne1234 Ай бұрын
Beautiful!! ❤please do more!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Thank you! Will do!
@akuasafoa Ай бұрын
omg missed you guys wow! hope you are both well
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Aw thank you! We are :) and hope you are too!! We’re excited that the Lord is releasing us to do this again and are looking forward to reconnecting with everyone!
@chantelled7710 Ай бұрын
Will see if hubby would like to listen to this with me. 3.5 years married with 3 kids and both neurodivergent 🤪 pray for us 🙏😂
@chantelled7710 Ай бұрын
@KianandKyle thank you lovely!! 💕 you guys are a huge encouragement!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
You got this! God is with you 🙌 Praying for y’all!!
@yensilopez168 Ай бұрын
More of these please!
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
We’re excited to get back into the swing of things on here! More to come 😆
@ashleykindheartministries 28 күн бұрын
This is so good!!❤️ Please pray for me and my husband.
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Praying for you guys! Please let us know if there is anything specific you would like us all to be interceding for on yalls behalf! 🙏🙏
@ashleykindheartministries 25 күн бұрын
@@KianandKyle Wow, thankyou so much❤️😭 We have a ministry in India for about 200 families- homeless families, leper colonies and the beggars. We have been married seven years, but about eight months ago I gave up on our marriage and left my husband. We have four children together. Then a couple months ago I had a change of heart and came back to him. But because of my failure we lost almost 100% of our supporters from our ministry.😭 Now over 500 people are suffering because of me. Please pray for God to restore our ministry and heal our marriage. Thankyou so much!! kzfaq.info/get/bejne/nLmCZsdyqMzKloU.htmlsi=Jbf7xMPvtvdonrZi
@ashleykindheartministries 23 күн бұрын
@@KianandKyle Thankyou! Please pray that the Lord will completely restore our ministry in India, and that He will expand our ministry into every place He intends to. Thankyou!❤️
@kita3256 26 күн бұрын
More of these videos please !! Podcast!! 🙏🏼
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
🙌 any ideas on what you would like to see?
@kita3256 25 күн бұрын
@@KianandKyle definitely a continuation to this topic in this video. It was sooo good! Another idea is, how do you study the Bible together? Another idea, personal testimonies Another idea… how are you actively teaching your child about Jesus? Blessings!
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
@@kita3256 love the ideas! Thanks for sharing!!
@kelceynicole Ай бұрын
this is so off topic, but has anyone ever told you guys that Kyle looks like Sylvester Stallone? Not identical, but they look like they could be related!!
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Hahaha actually yes 👊
@kelceynicole 14 күн бұрын
@@KianandKyle 😂I love that I’m not the only one that sees it. that’s pretty cool!
@Mkiygfd Ай бұрын
Has porn ever been an issue in your relationship? If so could you talk about how you have navigated it ?
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
💯💯💯 will mark it down for a future discussion!
@calliecarter1645 26 күн бұрын
wondering this too
@kenamo649 Ай бұрын
its being a while here fam 😊
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
Good to be back!
@jc5121 Ай бұрын
🎉
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
🥳
@journaling_tea Ай бұрын
My boyfriend who i have been with for almost 2 years says he will never marry again, its sad that i have turned myself back to God and he hasnt and i dont see him changing that mindset
@KianandKyle Ай бұрын
The Lord has a husband for you, not a boyfriend for life. Praying for you guys 🙏
@user-wp2iu5ef3o 27 күн бұрын
do these mics not pick up breathing??? WHAAAAA
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Hahaha not really but they will if you breath hard enough ;)
@Steppingheavnward Ай бұрын
Why do you use God’s name in vain as “Christians”?
@KianandKyle 25 күн бұрын
Can I ask what you mean and where we do that specifically?
@funnynina1 16 күн бұрын
This is good very helpful content very biblical
@KianandKyle 16 күн бұрын
Glad you think so!
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