Exactly. Some women are clueless about their own behaviour

​@@bojack3827👏👏

​@@theformidabletruthno woman would do that.

Oh God! Not another quote by M. Monroe again? When will this moronic cliche finally wear out? Why would anyone want to accept you at your worst? Do you cuddle a serial killer when he goes on a rampage? Do you give a hug to psychopath who just burned you house? How about instead of bursting into emotional diarrhea that is likely to hurt people around you, you try to control your emotions and take the accountability for your actions like a mature, responsible, rational adult?

So basically it's your mom

no wonder y'all are single

Yo! Easy there mate must be tired regulating unasked opinions @@user-er8dl8cq2n

❤

Everyone should be putting themselves first, that’s how you maintain yourself lol It’s not new information.. if you don’t put yourself first you will be depressed and disappointed

@@user-er8dl8cq2nI’m actually not, but you probably are

I was thinking the same thing!

As a man she is correct. Getting a lot of attention/availability from a low value woman does not make her more valuable and it makes her look even cheaper. True, no spicy, salty women, be as feminine and easy going as possible - easy does not mean hook ups. Too many women are chasing chads that care nothing for them - and they still do the hookups and situationships and wonder why the marriage offer is not there.

Single mom?

"Online big sisters" love this! Wish I would have known these things myself at that age as well. Now they are just my "smarter sisters"! Haha

Hey, we big brothers are out here doing the same thing protecting our little bros from trifling 304s that are made for the streets. 😉

Youll full of shit

If you complain you only make my point stronger, all this is beyond schizophrenia and delusion, good luck

You are so lucky I wish KZfaq was a thing in the 1990’s! I was scammed at 20 with a narcissist McDonald eating freak! So young to go through all that bull! He knew exactly what he was doing ! I was a stranger in my own life.

Thank you for summarizing all 10 points! Was just looking for this ❤

1. Doing more for man does not equal them valuing you more! 2. Valuing yourself first and putting yourself first does makes man value you. 3. Man does not want a spicy fight, they want a woman who will make him see himself as incredible man, you make him feels like the wayy he want to be. Secure attachment, I am an interesting woman with opinion. 4. It's about I am hard to get but easy to be with. I maintain playfulness....I cannot be contacted often. I have a builded life. 5. If I am confident I will be attracted to him.

1. Doing more for man does not equal them valuing you more! 2. Valuing yourself first and putting yourself first does makes man value you. 3. Man does not want a spicy fight, they want a woman who will make him see himself as incredible man, you make him feels like the wayy he want to be. Secure attachment, I am an interesting woman with opinion. 4. It's about I am hard to get but easy to be with. I maintain playfulness....I cannot be contacted often. I have a builded life. 5. If I am confident I will be attracted to him. 6. If he is not ready and I am not his type I leave it! 7. If he is not sure about us I am not sure! 8. Young man are not ready for the relationship that I need. 9. When he needs space or run away, I am letting him go. I am closing the gap. 10. Let people be who they are and I won't try to change them.😊

femina-zi.

Thank you so much ❤

I would love to hear about the first one.

2.

yesss center your yourselfff

Decentering. Absolutely!!!

Decenter men, center yourself...ohh how I felt proud asserting this❤❤❤

A lot of frogs for me tho😅😅😂

Exactly

Finally you lowered your standards and settled for less.

I really want a suggestion rn So me (23) and my partner (26) are in relationship from 9 months we almost live together ... he told me during our frndship and dating time that he completed his graduation and quit the chartered accountant course in the final stage ( there are 3 stages, final is the last stage ) bc he thought it is not worth it ( two years ago) , he isn't working rn and doesn't like doing job or anything , he wants to learning trading ( which he is good at ) and not interested in studies... And he promised 2 of his friends that he would write their exam on behalf of them and took some money to help one of his friends mom hospital bill... and I did support and help him in all these things .... ( iam pursing chartered accountant final exam ) .. we both failed in those exams which we wrote unfortunately ( my exam and his friends exam ) .. So last week he left for a marriage to attend ..so I snooped into his laptop .. turns out he didn't even complete the second stage of chartered accountant course , .. he is been lying to me since 9 months... ( he once told me that he have to tell me something important but he needs good timing to tell ) there were a lot of circumstances which he could have possibly told me that secret ( nobody knows that he didn't finish it , he lied to everyone ) , iam feeling betrayed , used , manipulated, deceived, ,... I unable to trust him anymore .. I confronted him ... he told me that he was used to that lie .. and didn't have courage to tell me .he feels sorry .. and guilty .. but wants one last chance ... I feel like I don't know this person at all .. what should I do? .. ( besides this I know he loves me and I love him too, but I donot trust him )

Love this comment!

I love love love your comment! ❤❤❤ Big hug and thanks from İstanbul, Turkey 🫶🏼🧿

I agree!! I walked away from a relationship with a man that viewed my consistent/giving nature as “weak” and desperate. When in reality I was communicating and putting effort like a normal adult I didn’t even go overboard. He was just emotionally unavailable (which is hell btw - RUN!!) so he viewed availability as desperation. I left because I need a man who matches and appreciates my energy.

@user-rx7uh9mg4f Nah, I don't think it's emotional unavailability. I think he just wasn't into you. And that's ok. Most bf/gf relationships end anyway and are to watch if you two are compatible or not. You're looking for a communicative man who is giving & he prefers a more independent assertive woman. That's fine. It doesn't make someone mentally ill to not like you anymore.

THIS THIS THIS.

ma man

As Dr. Orion Taraban says: women oftentimes to the right things for the wrong men

What she says is true tho, I've seen it. Married women who take care if themselves are more respected by their man and others in their life

@@Of_infinite_Faith but why is that? I mean it's true but what is the psychology behind ? Why men do respect women (MORE) who take care of themselves?

❤

I second these!

Boundary means that You leave when it's crossed. It's not a negotiation point, but leaving.

1 - put your cards on the table. My first time dating I couldn’t understand that she didn’t like something’s because she would always say things like “I’m not sure…”, “I don’t know…”, but one time she simply said in a calm manner “I don’t like this and that please stop” and I was finally able to understand. I don’t walk on eggshells with my friends, when they are doing something wrong or that I don’t like, I say they are jerks and should stop. 3 - I don’t think you can avoid them, but you can avoid going to places they go. 4 - Don’t talk bad about others behind their back, don’t be passive aggressive, dress respectfully, be respectful, don’t talk too loud, read books and be intelligent ( but be modest about your intelligence if you don’t want to sound arrogant and cocky), don’t talk to much about yourself, don’t play always the victim, be responsible, take care of your posture (honestly, it’s so attractive when woman have good posture), and don’t trash talk men, men and woman do have problems and hold grudges towards each other, but we should just keep it to ourselves and act reconciliatory. This is my personal opinion as a men, take it or leave it.

Confused man here... what exactly is a 'dusty man'

Isnt the is what a lot of women expect men to do for them though? Work 2 jobs. Provide. Why is it bad when a woman does it? Personally I think it’s bad either way.

Number 1 and 2 contradict each other 😅

“Be yourself!!” “Don’t give him too much because he will take it for granted!” Really? 🙄

@@msalexxa2012women and logic doesnt work. At least in the case of those femcels. God bless their poor souls.

Thank you for validating her points

Thank you!

only a simp with no value and full of hypocrisy can say this

Found the simp😂 As a man, none of what she says resonates with me. It’s the same old new age woo woo self-love masturbatory bull that all these self-help woman gurus peddle to lonely and damaged women nowadays

@@snakegriffin4928 lol. Can't do anything about you being dead inside, bro. Didn't write this for approval or to get attention from a married woman (or you for that matter). I probably don't even approve of her value system. But what she was saying in that video made a lot of sense with respect to what degrees of freedom you have as a woman when looking for a man. Tell me one thing you don't agree with. E.g. as a woman trying to get a man enter a relationship with you is futile if the man doesn't freely choose to commit. That's his free will. Disney romanticism is not an automation. And women who think otherwise are narcissists. They may try to manipulate him (doing things, offering sex early / before marriage, ...), but it will backfire in one way or another.

Ofcourse men like you must exist but the thing is there are so many guys who are immature and reckless when in their 20s. Finding the men who knows their self worth are very rare

Which is why the title mentioned in the 20s. And she's speaking on how women tend to get hurt in the 20s too. But if you're saying you're in your 20s then I must say you're great at being mature so young.

Are you single?

She mentioned what she wished she knew in her 20s. That doesn't say what the age of the men she is speaking about. Being self aware and knowing your value does not know age and by that I mean a man or woman can be self aware at a young age just as you can have someone who is never achieved self awareness and is 70, 80 or 120. And yes men and women can live to 120 if they take care of themselves.

Girl calm down@@funtimes3962

Dang I wish i started learning this kind of info at your age. Keep it up! Proud of you 👍

​@@Couscous77 Right? There were so many great things about growing up without the internet, but the free life lessons would have been amazing...

Women learn best from men. Didn't you know ?

there is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things

its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is SHELLY RENEE WHITE.

this is helpful, I will look her up. I hope this works for me too, I really miss her.

Bot comments

Be single forever.

You can choose to have a family or grind in the rat race. You can focus on your baby and your husband or in your degree/career... You can't have the cake and eat it too at the same time... If you try doing that the outcome will be a divorce.

How are women the prize? Men must earn their value. The definition of value is different for men and women. Women are valued for their beauty and men for their ability to protect and provide. Women are born with value. There is plenty of beautiful women but a shortage of high value successful males. Just because you say you are the prize does not change the facts.

​@@leonh2044 bs women are born with a uterus that's it highly desirable women have other good trails too how they speak how they move how intelligent they are without that no they wouldn't be high value beside men have to work and earn to get a women how one gonna work for something while being the prize you earn the prize

@leonh2044 well you just answered your own question; women are born with value..what i am trying to highlight is that women should work on themselves too. They want to be claimed and "conquered" thats what I mean by prize

@044 Who are they earning value for though? Lots of beautiful women for sure but it is not about just being beautiful. If you are unlucky enough just to be plain or below average you are working to gain that value in society lol. Yet the goal is to be a well rounded women(fit, good partner, intelligent, potential to be good mother etc). When you ask men if it easy to find that they say no especially now. You are missing one little piece of the puzzle. If women weren't prized in some way men would not feel the need to put themselves above all other competition to get the prized women in their eyes. Goes both ways.

​​@@leonh2044 because men compete for women. Women do not compete for men, unless he is of an extremely high caliber, which is rare. You said it yourself, women have inherent value, and men have to build themselves. Thus beautiful, kind women are the "prize" that is rewarded to hard working men

As you point out, women don’t understand how indifferent society is to men (no one cares whether a man succeeds or dies, but if he’s going to die just do it where no one has to listen to him suffer). So that makes your attention gold for him. This video confuses “doing nice things for him” and “smothering him”-the first is great, the second is terrible. But when you invest in him, see if he invests in you. If not, cut back.

I disagree somewhat. Men do get validation in society (a lot more than women). Their accomplishments are more valued than women, what they have to say is taken more seriously. It’s a bit of a catch 22 because while men receive less affection, they’re also more coddled (not all). It seems both can be true at the same time (ie. Less affection from dad, coddled by mom) at varying degrees depending on a person’s specific circumstances. I think men probably do experience less social warmth in certain settings where they’re unfamiliar to people; because men are more often perceived as a threat than women. (And conversely, women are more often perceived as possible prey ). It’s not something I would describe as an indifference toward men, but more like an instinctive defensive measure that comes from living as a woman and being aware that you are seen as prey, or someone who can be easily overpowered and taken advantage of and the fear and survival instinct that comes with that. It’s very interesting learning about and comparing the different experiences of the genders moving through life. Hopefully it helps us understand each other more.

@@OMGitsShrimp​​⁠ Disagree. How are men’s accomplishments validated more? That seems like a stretch. Nobody really cares unless you’re uber successful, and that’s because you’re successful, or attractive, or people want something from you. Nobody celebrates the average man, the hardworking men who keep our societies afloat. They’re criminally under appreciated. Women seem to employ the apex fallacy a lot when viewing and talking about men I’ve noticed.

This 🙌

Put your cards on the table, without walking on eggshells, but in a calm manner.

yes, adult friendship is hard. I love my girls but I'm so afraid to reach out and be a burden.

haven't seen the tik tok may be it draws more attention.

If you already think you should leave him, then I think you already intuitively know your answer. Good luck sis❤️

@@ninjabrown8560 I guess you're right i have this feeling that he is with me coz he doesn't have other options altough he proposed

lol yes

I read "once you create a pros and cons list, youre already out the door." Its okay to leave, its okay to start over. You're incredible, you are amazing! You can be single and you are going to thrive!

@MsRickylynn guess so ! he is hesitating a lot although he proposed but i guess i am not his type or he run out of options

genuine not out of desperation to keep.

Yes, you are actually correct. Men need a purpose. And it's hard to find one without a family. That's why so many men have gone to war voluntarily. Because it gives you a purpose. That's the single most solid advice.