1-No longer see things in B&W 2-Natural desire to CARE FOR YOUR BODY 3-Crave for HEALTHY FOODS 4-Not more TV or video games BINGING 5-You are not re-traumatizing yourself 6-WORK LIFE goes better 7-More PRODUCTIVITY, FOCUS, PUNCTUALITY. 8- DECLUTERING, better spaces. 9-NO MORE BLAMING ourselves or others 10-Healing RELATIONSHIPS 11- Prefer REALITY than fantasies 12-MATERIAL WELL BEING improves.

Not one of us is perfect 👍 My step-sister told me “We know that there are people who see things in black and white, but we live in a colorful world.”

The rabbit hole saved my life. Your videos saved my life. Im the one doing the work - but i needed someone to throw a flag and tell me that none of the childhood abuse was ok. It formed every aspect of my life and I didn’t know it until I was 42

One of the things I noticed about my trauma healing journey is that after practicing boundaries and removing myself from enmeshment, it's *do much easier* to spot it now. I won't find myself wound up with another person completely by accident, unaware that it's happening. 😊 Now I know the signs because I understand boundaries and where my responsibility ends.

"You'll lose interest in assigning blame" I find that "blame" is only useful as data for problem solving and data for learning. It's a tool. This is what I teach my kids. When used as a weapon, blame creates division and misery.

Thank you for this. I work so hard on going forward that I tend to forget to lift my head and take a moment to look back to see how far I've come.

I'm so proud of how I'm doing. You've been a huge part of that, Anna. THANK YOU, thank you so much 🙏🙏

There is no way this video drops when I actually notice real healing ( through extremely hard work )

Encouragement is medicine, discouragement is poison. You said that I felt this right now on the progress i made coz of you. Thank you I dont know where I would be(morbidly obese, tied to a cult, jobless and unmotivated, befriending more high-conflict unsafe people, scared to talk to people who-even-knows). Gluttony (food and media) both went away slowly on their own. ❤ Love you Anna.

You’re so right we don’t hear or read about the signs of healing very often. Thank you for this, Anna!!🙏

71 and with help of a wonderful therapist I am getting better. I was glad to see that I am making progress based on your list. I knew I have been doing better but it is good to have it reaffirmed.

Thank you x I feel proud of the healing I've been through over the last two years. At 45 I needed to stop the cycle of trauma and really address why I found life so, so difficult. With a recent break up and my mental state low just breaking, I'm feeling so happy with who I am, what is happening around me and my continued battle with addiction, which sees me clean for 10 months x Your kind words where exactly what I nedded to hear today

I have been listening to you for 7/8 months around the time I started counseling she told me I have cptsd ( that was the saddest day of my life ( imo) I cried about a week then I saw your video and helped me to understand I even bought the Pete Walker book this my first time commenting on your video thank you I needed to hear this once I build up the courage to write you a letter I will do it due to questions I have ( am still confuse about cptsd ) Wow I have to say to my surprise I look forward to your video & knowing I will learn about myself to think all this time I thought I was alone in all this... Again thank you CCF and commenters 😊

One thing I have stopped doing, which has really helped my healing, is sitting and dwelling on the past all day. Having a visual schedule up on my wall of things that I want to get done, and that I need to get done. I still have all or nothing thinking. Mainly about myself though. The all or nothing thinking for me is that I always have to be happy. That I never am allowed to be sad, and stuff like that. I’ve overcomes so many things. So I know that I can overcome this! Another thing that I still am working on, is showing my true, authentic self. Not masking just to please society and their rules and norms. Yes, I do certain things that a lot of people see as different. But it’s just me expressing myself. Another thing I need to overcome is being hard on myself, when I do show emotions, or when I do mess up. Instead, to be more kind and loving towards myself. Not just loving myself for some parts of me, but loving myself for all parts of me, and not limiting or restricting myself. I’ve got this! I’ve overcame so many things, and I use my coping skills a lot more than what I used to.

This is a wonderful list of signs of healing within. I will share this with those who are also on the path of healing from trauma. Healed people, heal people 😊 Thanks Anna ‼️❤️💚💙💜

Thank you so much for this reminder. I'm exactly where I need to be💟

I didn't realize I've been healing. Ty 😊

I see myself having healed in some of these milestones, in the process of healing and achieving others, and have acknowledgement and awareness that others are on the horizon of my healing journey and that there is so much more to come. Thank you, CCF, for the insight and perspective, your videos are wonderful.

Just thank you. This was such a beautiful reminder of how much I have healed. ❤ Bless you sweet one. ❤

Now that I know how to regulate my nervous system, everything is going better. It can seem like forever, but I can now take advantage of opportunities that I was too ashamed to even try for. My life is improving, sometimes slowly, but everything is so much more manageable now. Thank you, CCF

People pleasing has stopped for me! Exaggerating and trying to hide something makes no sense now. I can observe more and detach from the conflicts at work. I was so busy staying busy that I was always in a hurry and rushed… whew

Not needing the escapism is one that I have starkly noticed in the past couple years. I used to play video games or binge tv for hours at a time, every single day, just to escape my life and emotions. Now, I still enjoy those things, but in moderation. I find I don't desire being a couch potato. If I watch tv, it's maybe for half an hour a night - and not every night. If I play games, it might only be for an hour a couple times a week. Now I crave moving my body and engaging with creative projects. I never would have believed before that I could achieve that - it feels incredible!

I feel that this video is so necessary in the healing trauma space.

For mental health-related reasons, I just ended a friendship with someone who I am now pretty sure has CPTSD following a period of conflict and (while still I feel the break was necessary) have been feeling ashamed and guilty. If not downright evil. Since then, I have turned to your videos to try and understand the condition better. I feel I am gradually learning things that I never would have known otherwise. In the future, I hope that I can become an ally to the community. Thank you, Anna.

You look fantastic ❤❤❤australia…please don’t stop your work…you are saving lives 🎉

I still suck at many things, but I am certain I can work in the right direction. I am oddly less harsh on myself, I used to talk to myself in an abusive tone on the inside-like I agreed with my abuser. Now any BS stays on the front porch and gets dealt with if possible or avoided if its not important. The house still has very few people but every now and then someone peeps in and waves hello. :)😅

6. "You'll lose your appetite for conflicts on the job" I find that I don't relish conflict, but I'm more educated and aware of the role that conflict plays, and I'm ok with effective conflict to come to a greater outcome. What I mean is when we set aside our egos and work together for the greater good, even when it's a little uncomfortable.

What a great video! And makes me so happy bc I am experiencing all these! thank you

Oddly enough, while I'm showing very few of these behaviors, I feel better about it. There is a big difference between "you must do these things in order to heal" and "doing these things is a sign you're healing." That lifts a lot of guilt for not coping. I am also grateful for the observation that learning to see shades of grey is a good sign. It sheds a lot of light on what I'm going through right now. It's miserably unpleasant, so it’s good to know that it's a good thing.

Thanks for listing these out, sometimes I think that the healing process is endless and I feel some despair at that thought. Other times I question if I've healed much at all (these thoughts are usually around bedtime when I'm tired). But your list has helped me understand that I'm perhaps 2 thirds of the way to being a mentally healthy and stable person. I've recently beaten my addiction to drugs, and I'm nearly there with alcohol and cigarettes. I still have more work to do around avoidance of responsibilities and procrastination, which feeds into my dread of deadlines and getting up in the morning. Over the last year I resolved my limerence/romantic fantasy issue for good. Screen time is something that I need to work on, I often go to bed late then I'm tired in the morning! Avoidance is such a big issue for me... But I'm so proud of myself for getting this far in 5 years. Maybe in another two years, I'll be fully stable.

SO MUCH THIS ' no want of fudging the truth or lying about yourself ' 😍 YES!!!!!!!

Thank you. All of this sounds wonderful. I can see some progress & look forward to more good outcomes.

Needed this today.

I need to listen to this at least once a day. 😊

Every few months I bump back into you and each time you touch a topic that, despite the strides forward I continuously make, touch me deeply at that moment. Today you're making me feel like I've grown a lot and let a lot go, such a wonderful realization. I've said this before but you've made such a huge impact on my life, speaking things I knew to be true deep down, explaining irrational behaviors and insisting on good behavior being important. Making me understand things therapy was not helping me with. You're doing such important work. I never tire of listening to your profound insights. Thank you, Anna. Really.

This video is just pure gold!! Thank you. I feel quite blessed to have found you, Fairy. You give voice, and validation and wisdom and concrete descriptions of these very positive and real milestones in a life that is healing. Thank God I have experienced many of them. We are and will continue to be a work in progress.

l do notice positive changes since I started trauma therapy. Perhaps the biggest change for me is wanting to live a more authentic life. I am trying to practice more intentional living and I am trying to get away from the HIFI lifestyle. And yes, I can now catch limerence and find a way around it. Also, I am addressing pr0n compulsion. For me realizing it is an issue is a big breakthrough

Yes this is good news. I’m about 90% there then. It’s been a long journey and I didn’t think there was an end in sight, until now. Thank you ❤

lol it’s so true. I never thought about my past, then my dad died, and then another narcissist (disguised as a gentle lamb) started in on me, now I’m often in my head, eating constantly, and I stopped caring about anything.

You know your list made me realize that trauma is a very individual thing and we don't all have the same behaviors when we're traumatized. That's why I like it when people who talk about healing trauma from abuse talk about it in not so much of a list, oriented, specific definition sort of way though I know that a lot of us go around specifically looking for those channels. A lot of us like the ones that give us 10 signs of this and five signs of that. Anytime I see that, I don't mean this, but I mean very specifically list, format things. Narcissism, for example, is the spectrum, and believe it or not, there's not one way that they all act. What the narcissists did Who harmed me might be very different from with the ones that harmed someone else did. So the first thing on this list, the tenancy review things in black-and-white, is a problem I've never really had. I used to take care of myself, and eat better and dress better up until the point where about 10 years ago certain really harmful people kept coming into my life one after the other after the other after the other back to back and it did so much damage I just couldn't get up and move anymore. See for me, I do relate to the crappy childhood. There are things I can talk about that happened to me that definitely is still evoke pain to this day but the worst things that have happened to me started at about age 17 or 18 and just kept going. Binging on screens, I have the same thing with that that I have with food and lack of exercise. It's only been a problem for about the last 10 years. Still, if I go by this list because I didn't used to have those habits and now I do it sounds like I'm getting worse and not better. I have terrible insomnia, and anytime I dream it's a nightmare. I think I had one dream about a week and a half ago that was decent. I don't lie about myself, and I don't hide things what I do instead is, I don't interact with anybody, so I'm not in a position to have to do those things. I thought maybe I was starting to get a little better, but maybe I'm not. Why did I think I was starting to get better? Well, one because even though I still really get the urge to continue to talk, compulsively and overexplain myself to people who aren't even there anymore and don't want to hear from me because I've been a loop of pain about the way that it ended, not the fact that it ended, but the way that it did I don't even know if I'm going to hear that on your list. it's not that I don't still get the urge. In fact, I write things, but then I realize that I shouldn't send them. I'm able to write it read it back see the reasons why I'm wasting my time, and the result is likely to be unfulfilling, if not re-traumatizing, and I'm able generally to make myself shut up. I no longer view any of the people I had Limerence about in that way. I don't believe in the one that got away concept anymore. I recognize that even if we had a relationship that lasted much less time than I wanted it to that should've been enough to show me what the relationship actually was. I don't know that I'm even saying that well because I guess I don't need to be perfect in a KZfaq comment.

Thank you for existing, Fairy! Your way of putting words to feelings… overwhelms me everytime! Lots of love and appreciation!

You are brilliant and someone I wish I could be friends with. You are giving help to hurting people that is priceless! Thank you for your empathy and care!!!

One big thing for me was that I don’t care anymore about “being someone” whether that be very successful, famous, well known. That was a trauma response I had for years. After being in a stable and loving relationship and away from the abusive family I grew up in, it simply went away one day.

Holy crap, this was eye-opening for me. I started changing my diet, and lost the desire to eat the sugary crap I once loved. I thought it was depression. Same with watching television. I’m finding myself itching more and more to read books. I even deleted half of my social media accounts because I just wasn’t liking the way the constant negativity was impacting me.

Taking a moment to hear this and see the areas where I’ve made so much progress was refreshing! I haven’t really don’t that on a long time - I’ve come a long way - still moving forward! Thank you!

I feel like it never ends with me. I do standup comedy and the more I do it, the more I realize I have major problems communicating due to my trauma. The more I work on it, the better I am at my craft, but it's slow going at times and highly frustrating. I'm definitely healing, but I feel like it's never going to stop with me because my trauma is complex and from my mother.

Beautifully put. Thank you.😊

Thank you SO MUCH for this. It's easy to dwell on the hardships of trauma without recognising the progression of growth and eventual successes of overcoming and learning to manage it. Some of your signs of healing from trauma I can resonate with and see in my life which is so encouraging and some things I see as hope and pointers to look out for as happy signs. Your words point out the positivity of healing from trauma that is sometimes lacking when being in it for so long. This is very encouraging and validating and gives me hope to continue my journey. Thank you so much for this encouragement ❤️ it's a messy journey but it's a good one.

Thank you! That is something I needed to hear at this time of my life.

Oh my goodness this all rings true 😊 the biggest change is the honesty - I can't abide dishonesty now, in anyone, including myself.

OMG. I feel this way. Its like I just arrived on the planet. Age 33. I held on and I made it out of the bubble

Thank you for speaking where I am living now. I am GRATEFUL.

how true and sweet is this.

Great List!

Wow! This entire list resonates with me. I feel like I have so much more clarity on why I did certain things previously and how much I've healed now. Thank you for this informative video. ❤

🙂 Thank you, Fairy ☺️ 😊You caused me to smile 🙃☺️

Lovely life affirming video...thank you. ❤

I'm right there at point number 12 - material well-being! thank you, this was beautiful, a kind of a prayer.

I wish I found this channel 20 years ago 😂

I have cut back some on the narcissistic videos. I’ve been educating myself for the last 5 years. I’m out and away from the main toxic and narcissistic individuals as I went no contact. My biggest test will be coming this winter and I’m looking forward to it 😃

Thank you CCF. I needed that today.

Thank you!❤❤❤

Wonderfully said!

Thank you a lot Anna, I needed this.

Thank You for the encouragement...

Sooo good & hope-giving Anna! You really nailed this comprehensive list! Wow!

Thank you, Anna ❤. So good to see some of my progress on this list. It’s been a hard year but a really good one. Your videos and writing program have been a big part of my healing. Thank you. 💐

I hope SO much for a new career! 🙏

Thank you!

Thank you Anna. This video is so good.❤

thank you ....this is good to hear 🙂

Thank you for this. I’m well on my journey according to this. 👊🏼💞🎉

Bless you. ❤️

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You have changed my life in so many ways.

This is the third day I've heard the phrase, "further than you think"

Anna, thank you so much for this one!

I'm still early in my journey but it's nice to see some quantifiable progress. Other parts of the video still feel far away and foreign to me but I hope to get there some day. Also - progress is not linear. There's ups and downs. It's important to keep that in mind.

I AM IMPROVING....MAINLY BECAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR HONEST BUT EMPATHETIC VIDEOS OVER THE PAST 4 MONTHS. BLESS YOU AND THANK YOU ALL YOU DO. YOU MAY HAVE SAVED MY LIFE. I'M STILL SCARED TO DEATH BECAUSE OF MY LIFE SITUATION, BUT I FINALLY AM MOVING FORWARD AFTER 3 1/2 YEARS OF FLAT OUT INACTIVITY SINCE MY "EMOTIONALLY INCESTUOUS" MOTHER'S DEATH. BUT STILL, IT'S REALLY HARD BEING 18 AGAIN AT 57. BUT GOD SEEMS TO BE GUIDING ME. BUT I'M STILL SCARED.

Thank you so much for your kind work. God bless you 🙏 ❤️

Yeah, that is a big problem, it's why I take a break from this kind of thing when I feel myself getting overwhelmed.

Thank you so much, you give me hope❤

Thanks for this, I have cptsd, from gulf war and other issues during childhood, first person to have actually made sense. Thanks

10 and 11 hit so hard. I feel like I will never be able to trust people.

Thanks for this one. Would you talk about what causes us to dip in and out of these positive signs, and how to stay in them for longer

I know I'm healing but it is still hard knowing my parents were never there for me. My dad molested me and my mom did nothing. I never understood why she didn't love me. I know they were hurt people . They should have got help. I repeated some of their behaviors. I have been struggling with addiction for most of my life. I have one daughter that doesn't speak to me and my youngest loves me . She reminds me of how much I hurt her growing up because of my trauma. I always say I will spend the rest of my life being a better mom.

Glory to God I AM ALIVE!!! OVERCOMER. I COULD TOTALLY USE A BEACH VACATION AND BUILD SAND CASTLES WITH MY LITTLES. THANKS CRAPPY FAIREY. WE ARE HERE, WE ARE HERE. WE ARE HERE.

I'm recognizing some of the signs in myself, which is very reassuring. Thank you 🙂

Thanks Anna , you and your Videos helped me a lot , I'm finally understanding myself better and I'm actually on the way to healing. ❤❤❤

I need to say this, that I’m having the most wonderful three some relationships with Me Myself and I and I’m accepting and loving all three of me 👍so it’s just a bit crowed to bring too many others into my life 😊

Half way there ❤

❤The Cheerleading here, MUCH appreciated!❤

Thank you very much

Thankyou for consoling mW for years

Thank you so much. It's good to know what the healing processes and healing stages are.

I appreciate this list, much, maybe all of it, true and occurring. I feel so “exiled”, though, as one Developmental Trauma practitioner puts it - exiled from everything - congruent experiences: proper work, peers, a partner, wrong geographical area … ugh. Definitely healing, healing, healing though.

Thank you !!!

Currently in the midst of a CPTSD flare that is really hard and painful. Comes after a period of sanity and serenity that felt like I was finally healing. I watched this to get some hope by reminding myself of how far I've come. Maybe it's too hard for me but I couldn't relate to most points and I have been doing this work for years. Shame couldn't recognise more of these changes in myself. Perhaps will watch again when I return to Self.

Thankyou for this

@crappychildhoodfairy As I've been noticing tremendous progress in my life recently, I can attest to the accuracy of what you say in this video. This was also a nice reminder to myself to acknowledge my progress and how much things have improved.

12. Im working hard to make 12 my reality. Almost have my new qualification 😊