Chopped Their Own Weiners Off - Tales From the Internet

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Ай бұрын

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A collection of horrifying stories from around the world.
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Пікірлер: 1 700

@JustinWhangYt Ай бұрын

Get 50% off your first order of CookUnity meals - go to cookunity.com/whang50 and use my code WHANG50 at checkout to try them out for yourself! Thanks to CookUnity for sponsoring this video!

@sxmbxdy Ай бұрын

My farts are worse than Whangs farts

@German3E Ай бұрын

@@sxmbxdyare you 8 or something?

@TheMemitim Ай бұрын

Missed opportunity to not show off a sausage dish

Ай бұрын

erm what the weiner choppage

@squishy_ Ай бұрын

The most impressive thing about whang Is he keeps getting sponsored for these types of videos

@JoeyJ0J0 Ай бұрын

Cross your legs boys, this is how Silent Hill characters are created

@German3E Ай бұрын

Ahahaha. I too get the joke

@Homodemon Ай бұрын

You know, I was having a great day not remembering the tale of That guy....

@TheDigitalApple Ай бұрын

Now we just need the schizo edit wars.

@r.a.fgattaiguy845 Ай бұрын

brb gotta add an entry to the wiki

@Cyndaqueer Ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂

@xemraldisaclown6750 Ай бұрын

The channel name has probably never been better for the video.

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@zephyr32 Ай бұрын

Wasn’t he demonetized years ago because of the name? I vaguely remember something like that

@ballbagchris6920 Ай бұрын

@@zephyr32must’ve been spelled without the H then

@quesadibro1245 Ай бұрын

*_Whang!_*

@Mindcrow Ай бұрын

@@ballbagchris6920Nah. I remember this. It was a big deal for the channel at the time. Homeboy had to like send YT his ID to prove that the channel name was just his actual name. 😂

@jayjonesrgaming Ай бұрын

“The staff were really upset” is a helluva downplay for said situation

@Clouditivity Ай бұрын

I laughed at that too

@st.anselmsfire3547 Ай бұрын

See, it works, because it happened in the UK, where understatement is a national pastime. They famously called a half-century of domestic terrorism "the Troubles."

@GlamStacheessnostalgialounge Ай бұрын

"Oi, bloody hell that bloke just cut his weiner off!" "Oh, bugger!"

@teethgrinder83 Ай бұрын

I can't wait till my Polish partner finishes work and I can show her that part-she often tells me how crazy many Poles can be but I always downplay it, I think she will feel vindicated lol

@Naptosis Ай бұрын

@@st.anselmsfire3547 That's very true, we also call the American revolution 'Tuesday'. We were rather busy at that time _making friends_ in Europe and playing with our sailboats. 😅

@jeush2709 Ай бұрын

I almost lost my main vein once as a young 16 or 17 year old lad. Was practicing throwing a machete at a log (like throwing a knife at a target but bigger). I missed and the machete went like flailing through the air, it bounced almost straight back at me and nailed me square in the crotch. Direct hit on the meat of my manhood. I freaked. Hand straight into the pants and clamped down on my dong. Ran up into the house and b-lined for the bathroom. Checked it out and everything was fine, just a red spot on the shaft. Looked and there was a hole sliced into jean fabric flap over the zipper and the zipper was fucked. If the machete tip had hit an inch to the left or right I'd have split my hotdog in half but luckily my zipper saved my manhood. Just thought I'd share this funny story.

@AmeshaSpentaArmaiti Ай бұрын

That's a leg crosser for sure

@gravitationalforce3258 Ай бұрын

Im in extreme pain just by reading this

@LoonyDoll Ай бұрын

Ooh, heroic zipper!

@AdamOwenBrowning Ай бұрын

we had metal-tipped javelins, not very sharp but still dangerous. no idea why we were trusted with them I was lying down on the field, hands behind my head, legs apart, and I feel a rush of air and a "Pfftht!" noise. I look up to see my sister's javelin throw had embedded itself between my knees like 10-12 inches away from skewering my sausage. If I was trusted with throwing knives as a kid, I am sure that me and all my siblings would exist in some form of dismemberment lol. Poor machete!! Don't throw machetes, they're not made for that!

@IneptOrange Ай бұрын

God decided you are important to the future of humanity. (Not religious btw, but god wants you to reproduce apparently)

@MikeFromIndied Ай бұрын

"He's all set to cocoon this girl in a load like those trapped women in Duke Nukem 3D" is insane.

@0neDoomedSpaceMarine Ай бұрын

_"Damn it."_ - Duke Nukem, 1996

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@D0NU75 Ай бұрын

props to him in the video about Mr Hands, he used the Doom guy grunting sounds to paint an explicit scene in my mind

@JakNasty69 Ай бұрын

@@0neDoomedSpaceMarine😂 I read that out loud in his voice

@jamesedwardladislazerrudo1378 Ай бұрын

@@D0NU75 I feel bad for Mr. Hands.

@louiechudley5616 Ай бұрын

16 years of not realising you need to wash your downstairs. 😮 That story broke my brain a bit.

@fancydeer Ай бұрын

nah you can wash your dick and not realize that it needs the skin retracted to be properly cleaned. the skin needs to be retracted from infancy onward to make sure it continues to be able to be retracted otherwise it gets painful. these guys' parents weren't properly cleaning their baby's privates and they neglected to teach them how to clean themselves when they got old enough to do it themselves.

@phaedrapage4217 Ай бұрын

That's some serious neglect on the part of the parents. As soon as your kid is old enough to wash themselves, you should really impress upon them the importance of gently pulling back their foreskin and washing properly. That could lead to some nasty infections.

@lambda653 Ай бұрын

@@phaedrapage4217 My parents never taught me that was important but I still figured it out on my own and I never got an infection. 16 years old is kinda old to never consider taking a look under. Not even a little curious? Come on.

@TsarNicholasyearsago Ай бұрын

Guys, I'm 19 and have phimosis and have never been able to pull the skin down since it's very tight. Is there anything I can do or am I fucked and need surgery? Will I end up like the dude in the story?

@eugenie8661 Ай бұрын

@@TsarNicholasyearsago Go to the doctors please, they'll tell you what they can do for you. It may feel embarassing in the moment, but your health is super important

@tropezando Ай бұрын

Hi, this is a courtesy PSA for anyone still confused: wash *everywhere that there is skin or hair* when you bathe/shower. The bottoms of your feet, your asscrack, your scalp, in every fold. You do not need to wash internally. Rinse well, and dry thoroughly to prevent soap residue and moisture buildup leading to chafing or fungal/bacterial growth. Change your undergarments daily or if soiled, whatever comes first. Do not sleep on soiled bedsheets or with dirty blankets, they can also harbor and spread pathogens. If you suspect you have an unusual condition, do not Minecraft your body parts, just go to a doctor.

@random_dragon Ай бұрын

"Do not Minecraft your body parts" is probably some of the best advice I've heard But yeah, a lot of people don't realize how important it is to wash various places. Apparently, there's a bunch of guys who just refuse to wash their butts? Or don't think they need to wipe. Some girls might not know to wash the underboob, or between their legs, either

@AmieMorley-st6tz Ай бұрын

@@random_dragon There are also a lot of women that unfortunately lean the complete opposite way, in that they clean their pussies in every way they can, even the inside, because they don't want to be seen as "dirty" and they think they need to get rid of their natural discharge and odour, because they've been taught that vaginas smell like fish and men hate that. That's why scented vaginal soaps and douches exist, that claim to balance the pH, but actually cause infection. There are women that think they need to scrub their vulvas with special feminine soap, when just water or a light cleanse of normal soap on the outside is fine, as the vagina self-cleans. So yes I agree, it's important for people to be educated in both ways.

@gabbls_ Ай бұрын

Hi, I'm a Minecraft player, and I don't understand. You can do a lot of things in Minecraft, and I can't apply the context with anything you do in that game to this. Sorry

@random_dragon Ай бұрын

@@gabbls_ it's just a funny way of saying not to do anything to yourself

@pourcelaine Ай бұрын

@@gabbls_if you’re being sarcastic I’m gonna look like an idiot for explaining this. If you’re being sincere then I hope this explanation helps -> because of KZfaq censorship people started saying “in Minecraft” after talking about doing censorship-unfriendly things. Like “im gonna nerf that dude….*in Minecraft*”, cause like KZfaq is supposedly okay with you talking about offing people in video games but not offing people in real life. That has now evolved to people straight up using “Minecraft” in place of any number of censorship unfriendly verbs. Instead of “I’ll off you in Minecraft” it’s now just “I’ll Minecraft you”. It’s just a joke tho it’s not a magic anti-censorship trick and my comment will probably get auto deleted 😂 so yeah. Don’t Minecraft your body parts.

@CourtneyCoulson Ай бұрын

"Push your skinnies back" my mother would always tell my brothers outside the bathroom door once they were old enough to bathe themselves. Shame on other parents who are too ashamed to discuss these vital things with their children.

@Maesterful Ай бұрын

Skinnies?? 😂

@CourtneyCoulson Ай бұрын

@@Maesterful don't you just love Aussie slang?

@konradgawronski2372 Ай бұрын

Tell me about it...i had to have it pulled back at age 5-6 i was in so much pain

@Naptosis Ай бұрын

@@konradgawronski2372 That's because it's bonded to the glans until boys are about 7-11 and not meant to retract before then.

@manwithnoname3024 Ай бұрын

Your foreskin? Is that what it means? Why wouldn't you just have your baby circumcised? It's insane how much cleaner it is. Plus I knew at least a half dozen kids in school who had it done at age 13+ because of infection or it was so tight they couldn't pull it down. The anti circumcision people are ridiculous.

@GuyerTown Ай бұрын

man sleepwalking my nuts off is a new fear i wasnt expecting

@kingcockroach. Ай бұрын

Worst ive done yet is walking around a hotel....naked and asleep 😅 i think there's been murders done while asleep

@youtubestudiosucks978 25 күн бұрын

@@kingcockroach. How many people did you homicide in your sleep? Were you really asleep or just pretending to sleepwalk to get away with it?

@Danthemighty1985 Ай бұрын

Blame parents and close family for not caring enough. My aunt always brought up awkward shit like this. Told me when i was like 7 to clean my junk properly or id never get a girl. Ive had plenty of girls thanks to that advice, im sure.

@whateverwhatever4026 Ай бұрын

Same. Im totally against snipping, because it never even occurred to me that others weren't cleaning themselves. I was told to even...pull it back to pee. Parents not teahcing their kids literally anything is crazy.

@0neDoomedSpaceMarine Ай бұрын

Your aunt did you a solid. A lot of people talk about young girls being left in the dark about menstrual health, and sure, there's a lot of girls out there who were let down on that front, but I'm sure there's many young boys who are similarly clueless about taking care of their wieners.

@Danthemighty1985 Ай бұрын

Yeah, if you start cleaning it early alot of it becomes logical. I pull it back to piss too bro. Better stream.@@whateverwhatever4026

@Danthemighty1985 Ай бұрын

@@0neDoomedSpaceMarine💯

@D0RYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY Ай бұрын

When I was in the 7th or 8th grade and starting to take interest in girls my dad told me to make sure i kept my junk clean cause no girl wants to suck a smelly penis. I always cleaned myself properly but made sure after that moment 😅

@Chrysriph Ай бұрын

Saw a guy have a psychotic break after taking shrooms one time, he also stripped naked and started attacking random onlookers. Not sure why psychosis requires being naked but here we are

@js8qp2pwisos Ай бұрын

Returning to a state of monkey...

@vanessaashford9203 Ай бұрын

it's weird, I'm bipolar and have taken essentially every well-known drug at least once (and not just orally...), and have had difficult experiences on psychedelics a few different times, and tbh it's really, REALLY hard for me personally to imagine massive self-harm while in that state of mind, like if anything during those experiences I usually became really irrationally afraid that I was going to get hurt or die, and would play it as safe as possible, rather than like...wanting to start cutting body parts off, fear of that kind of reaction though is what has kept me from ever taking datura (I mean that and the fact that datura is also just incredibly dangerous in general on every level, and not even enjoyable basically ever). I've also never really gotten the whole "getting naked randomly" thing on psychedelics, either, although that at least makes a *little* more sense than self-harm does to me (I guess actually I've *kind of* had that type of experience on MDM, but that's kind of a different thing, and in part it's because it raises your body temperature, so it wasn't just like "I'm going to randomly get naked and run off" or something).

@nitroxylictv Ай бұрын

@@scarlet_phonavis6734 Thats what actually happens to me when I smoke weed. Instantly upon getting high I start to feel the sensation of clothing again and I want to take most of it off. I think theres a reason some stoners just walk around in underwear. Being high on THC kind of unlocks your subconcious a little and makes you aware of things you werent before. Same can be said about nerves. I can lie in bed for a couple of hours without pain but as soon as I get high I start to feel every bump and curve in my mattress and it hurts. Its weird.

@StefanReich Ай бұрын

@@js8qp2pwisos Nudity is our natural state

@boogityhoo7452 Ай бұрын

Wait Wait, first off, what is 2cb but the bigger question that you just casually mentioned was someone feeling ill and dying in someone else's arms while yall were trippin on Sid and whatever 2cb is???? How fast did all that happen and why did y'all not call paramedics immediately?

@FormulaFanboy Ай бұрын

One day I really want him to just go "if you like this video... what's wrong with you?" and then the video abruptly ends

@purplesam2609 Ай бұрын

Remembering the story RubberRoss shared where his foreskin got in the way of him peeing when he was 10, so he had to go to the hospital and be circumcised. It was told specifically during Gartic Phone and he drew a balloon in the scene that said "sorry about your penis"

@JakNasty69 Ай бұрын

Sounds about right

@quacknaround Ай бұрын

I never saw the appeal of his channel but I get it now. I'll have to watch.

@compatriot852 Ай бұрын

Whang really did pick the perfect background song for this topic

@SheltonMantonOfficial Ай бұрын

Should’ve used penis music

@FUCrueAdventures Ай бұрын

He always does

@BluesM18A1 Ай бұрын

I saw the thumbnail and was immediately expecting this song. It's like instinct knowing what his videos are usually like.

@lordfriedrick7911 Ай бұрын

You read my mind

@twistedpear18 Ай бұрын

The perfect name too

@Flanders989 Ай бұрын

Similar thing happened to me like the smegma guy, except I was 14 when I realized it, no idea how long it'd been building up but eventually cleaned it all up. I still have "scars" left that were never able to fully heal sadly. Let your kids know before it's too late.

@Windwalker88 Ай бұрын

I would never forgive my parents

@ManuSDP Ай бұрын

Same thing at 13, never had permanent damage though

@nitroxylictv Ай бұрын

If i have a son one day I will never get him circumsized because im against that creepy infantile jewtardd mutilation shit but if a parent or parents are too oblivious or uncaring to teach hygiene they should at least get the snip upon birth. Also I actually remember the snip btw. I have a vivid memory from birth about the pain of getting my dick cut open and that trauma is why I think forced curcumcision should be illegal and have to wait 18 to get the procedure. Its such a bogus thing people do to their poor baby sons just to have one less thing to worry about instead of being proper parents. I lost my skin and obviously you lose a SHIT TON of nerves and sensation from circumcision but you can save your future sons from it. Believe me its true you lose nerves and sensation from that shit.

@user-hb3wt5df8e Ай бұрын

Damn I'm sorry to hear that

@pedroff_1 Ай бұрын

It definitely needs to be taught, as it can also infect, cauaing inglamation and increasing the chance of penile cancer. I swear, no joke, cleaning it up reduces cancer risk. The Brazilian government has tried a few time running PSA campaigns (usually through posters in public areas) and it always faces a ton of backlash, but, honestly, this is super important crap

@merenranemtyemsaf7874 Ай бұрын

For any young lad watching with phimosis, I had a similar issue to the guy in the video. I didn't pull my foreskin back until around the same age (16). It was actually my girlfriend who first told me that it was abnormal to be unable to pull it back, which was really embarrassing. She was an angel for being calm about it... I didn't have the same issues as the guy in the video did, though. A little bit of smegma, sure, but it came off easily every time I pulled it back a little in the shower. It took around a month of gently pulling the skin back in the shower to fully release (about a week for most of the head to be exposed, another three weeks to release an adhesion I had). My foreskin retracts as normal now, thankfully. Sex education is important!

@rosenrot234 Ай бұрын

The girlfriend part reminded me of my urologist. Fun dude. At one point he's just talking to nurses and saying something like "Now ladies you just have to protect your penises". He made the point of "If its going in you, its yours" or something like that.

@fyjypko4207 24 күн бұрын

When i was like 8-9 my father told me that i should be cleaning it and it should pull back but it just didnt go past the widest part of the head because my foreskin was like glued toghether with the head and i just couldnt pull it back at some point we went to the urologist and he had to break the foreskin and the head and that shit hurt really bad and even after some years my head felt really sensitive especialy when i had a boner and it was rubbing agaisnt my pants but now its fine

@JustM2024 7 күн бұрын

Your girlfriend was surely an angel

@TheDigitalApple Ай бұрын

Ahh sweet new BME Pain Olympics!

@chesqen Ай бұрын

My thoughts exactly lmao

@poweroffriendship2.0 Ай бұрын

Ah yes! BME Pain Olympics 2: Electric Boogaloo.

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@Slamthulhu Ай бұрын

@@poweroffriendship2.0 Actually there already was follow ups to BME Pain Olympics and unlike the first one that was faked (pretty sure Whang has a video about it) the follow-up compilations were actually real

@Curios_Caco Ай бұрын

Still don’t know if that was real or not

@princessstreetmetal Ай бұрын

Urethral Prolapse/Dying Fetus tour would be wild

@ballbagchris6920 Ай бұрын

Featuring “Come Cocoon”

@Gherragh Ай бұрын

I use this pretty good stuff to unclog a toilet, thin pipes, it happens. It's called Septic Gobbler

@Friendly_Neigborhood_Astolfo Ай бұрын

He did have a similar one about the women carrying a dead fetus in her and didnt know it!

@B3Rand0m Ай бұрын

I hope we get enough band names to make a tour poster soon!

@Daniel-zp4qq Ай бұрын

To bad Anal Blast is no more or that would be a hell of one.

@AgentGWG Ай бұрын

“I’m tired of microwave meals, so I ordered extremely expensive frozen meals to heat up in my microwave.”

@dietznutz1 Ай бұрын

Correct 😂

@MothMomo Ай бұрын

Silent Hill 4 fans are gonna have a field day with this one

@TheBruheak Ай бұрын

Now this is the kind of video to watch at 2:30 in the morning

@Jaxonvr1324 Ай бұрын

Hi beak

@The_Soul_King Ай бұрын

French ?

@fatpeopletv804 Ай бұрын

Jævla natterangler

@Jhud69 Ай бұрын

Bruh it's 2:30 as I'm watching this lol

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@thewexgamer1929 Ай бұрын

in the stripped club. straight up "jorking it". and by "it", haha, well. let's just say. My chopped peanits

@mikaroni_and_cheez Ай бұрын

Choosing to pronounce "jorking" the same way a j is pronounced in sweden

@LilWeed69 Ай бұрын

@@mikaroni_and_cheez ...iorkin?

@sbilldmilk Ай бұрын

*justr

@mushrooms5757 Ай бұрын

@@mikaroni_and_cheez yorkin my peenes 🥺

@cool_bug_facts Ай бұрын

@@mushrooms5757ojojojojoj

@marcosdheleno Ай бұрын

no joke, yesterday, for the first time in literaly 20 years, i sleepwalked. i got up, got dressed, and went on to buy a water filter for the kitchen, got back, and went back to bed. people who interacted with me, including the people in the store said i looked like i was in pain and headache, when i asked if i had gone there today. one of the girls even said she had asked me if i was alright, and i simply answered, "im just very sleepy" or something of the sort. luckly for me, the place that i went is really close by, and on the same side of the road as my house. i even remember bits and pieces of it. it was WEIRD kinda like a dream. i used to have that when i was a kid, but stopped sleepwalking as i grew older. no idea it happened yesterday. and gonna be honest, kinda scared it may happen again.

@phaedrapage4217 Ай бұрын

Urethral Prolapse would indeed be an epic name for a band. Even if they sucked, I would still feel compelled to buy a t-shirt and wear it on a regular basis. 😂

@yerboykakyoin624 Ай бұрын

This makes me think of a fishing shop in Nova Scotia (never went but my boyfriend has and got a shirt with it’s name on it idek if it’s real or not lol) that is called “The Master Baiter”

@Regigigas_YT Ай бұрын

When does the Jojo's Stand with that name drop? lmao

@treymoment Ай бұрын

average mince band

@Texasplit Ай бұрын

You could say they cut their WHANG! Off Teehee

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@capnjackgallows3204 Ай бұрын

@p-__ dude give it up for fuck sake

@darrellmyers7709 Ай бұрын

Lol

@bryansansone3301 Ай бұрын

I will never grow tired of lazy banjo music as Whang talks about the most horrific things possible.

@DeathByZombieGames Ай бұрын

9:29 "but he had not slaughtered a goat he had slaughtered his wiener" this shit made me die of laughter for like 15 minutes straight

@MattHanr Ай бұрын

Bachelor party a long time ago one of the boys took too much lsd and stripped down, began helicoptering, and then proceeded to try to manually remove his member with vigor. He wasn’t successful, but I actually never talked to him again, so I wonder if it still works

@boogityhoo7452 Ай бұрын

Was he using his hands to try and just pull it off? I don't understand why so many guys get compelled to cut their member off when they get trashed on psychedelics or alcohol ..

@MattHanr Ай бұрын

@@boogityhoo7452 yeah he was pulling full force and ended up on the ground wrestling with himself…I was already super uncomfortable that he was all of a sudden naked but it quickly got way more disturbing

@dr.altoclef9255 Ай бұрын

@@MattHanr So did y'all...do anything about it or did you just kinda stand there watching him try to play tug of war with his tallywhacker because honestly in that situation I'd probably be doing the latter..

@MattHanr Ай бұрын

@@dr.altoclef9255 the one guy that was really friends with him tried to help. Another guy pulled his phone out and filmed him 😳 everyone else evacuated

@zerotodona1495 16 күн бұрын

Well maybe don’t do drugs…?

@Jjay-kk2qn Ай бұрын

Feeling immensely lucky after hearing that 2nd story. I have phimosis and i didn't fully retract the skin until i was 21, and this wasn't by choice, i physically couldn't. but i didn't really think too hard about it until a girl was really confused when she saw my dick and was asking me about it, like how have i never seen the full head of my penis before. i ended up making an appointment with a urologist and he made incisions within the skin of my penis (absolutely horrifying experience, by the way) and when the skin was peeled back for the first time, the head was covered in smegma. but it wasn't hard or anything like that story, i was able to wash it off pretty easily and everything was mostly fine. i'm just glad this video didn't come out before this happened, because if i saw it then, i definitely would have had a heart attack lol

@fyjypko4207 24 күн бұрын

I had something simular but when i was like 9 and my urologist just pulled it by force and i dont know what worse it like pulled some of my head skin off and that shit hurt sooo much i remember going to the bathroom in school and crying because peeing hurt so much

@necrotic-bone Ай бұрын

“and she makes fun of him for it to this very day” 😭😭 as she should 12:00

@anothersettlementneedsyour9628 Ай бұрын

10:51 unfortunately I couldn’t find a band with such a name, but I found bands with names - Prolapsed Urethral Defecation, Urethral Defecation, Urethral Coagulation, Urethral Injection, Gangrenous Urethral Secretion, Urethral Seepage, An Urethral Carcinoma, Urethral Breath, Urethral Flatulence, Urethral Comunity, Congealed Urethral Polyp and simply “Urethral”

@AmieMorley-st6tz Ай бұрын

I think Urethral Breath is my favourite 😂

@AmieMorley-st6tz Ай бұрын

NO WAIT URETHRAL FLATULENCE HAHAHAHA

@thepotatotaxi2430 13 күн бұрын

The originality of goregrind bands

@carlcouture1023 Ай бұрын

So, about story 2, phimosis is actually WAY more common than most people think. It's also usually treated with topical creams and stretching. It's one of those things that nobody talks about but people really should because so many guys could avoid so many problems by nipping it in the bud (and then not have to get their bud nipped!)

@weevil8234 Ай бұрын

let it be known women randomly put their hands in their pants too

@whateverwhatever4026 Ай бұрын

Protecting the vag?

@theopulentone1650 Ай бұрын

I've never done that in my life.

@nitroxylictv Ай бұрын

Its mostly older women, and its more disgtusting. Its a big wet hole full of bacteria as opposed to skin.

@darksu6947 Ай бұрын

@@theopulentone1650Why not?

@voidpriestess42 Ай бұрын

Yeah sometimes it's just like Okay pants time

@OctoBear88 Ай бұрын

I don’t have a Willy, but the way I gasped and covered my mouth with my hand with some of the stories…. Had me SHOOK Don’t blame the poor guys, it is the guardians/parents job to teach and show their children how to self clean at a young age, this is knowledge that needs to be passed down thru the family line…. I need to take a break now that I’m realizing that ignorance can also be passed down till someone realizes that and breaks it. AGHHH We’re not born with all the knowledge of the world 😂😂 we are taught one way or another.

@thepotatotaxi2430 13 күн бұрын

Weenor

@JustM2024 7 күн бұрын

I was holding my breasts tightly the whole time, thinking, oh no...

@chasewilliams20 Ай бұрын

"Sex is for mortals..and i am a god." Umm....Zeus is one of the biggest hornballs ever.

@Dreamheart101 Ай бұрын

Well, then obviously he's not a god! /joke

@KatSpicert Ай бұрын

@@Dreamheart101 that /joke indicator seemed more like a plea to not get struck down extra hard by Zeus

@blunderingfool Ай бұрын

@@KatSpicert Aren't the Greek gods sleeping?

@gvd72 Ай бұрын

The abrahamic god didn’t sleep around, nor do gods in other mythologies I’m sure.

@Flesh_Wizard Ай бұрын

@@KatSpicertZeus would absolutely be extra hard

@rafaelmoura2103 Ай бұрын

"For todays video, lets take a look at men who have mutilated themselves in horrifying and sometimes comedic ways!" thats whangs channel in a nutshell i guess

@candy-eg3kf Ай бұрын

the lsd stories reminded me of a particular story from brazil; where a couple took lsd together at the beach and the man woke up with his stomach tore open and his intestines exposed. they claim they were attacked but the police report said the woman had a bad trip and attacked him. apparently they're still together

@KatSpicert Ай бұрын

Is HE still together?!

@Spauso Ай бұрын

When I read Brazil, I knew things were about to go off the rails. Lol.

@jamesedwardladislazerrudo1378 Ай бұрын

Dude......just RIPPED the damn stomach?!

@vilek_7235 Ай бұрын

Oh god I completely forgot about that Whang should probably do an episode on that, maybe a "bad trip" themed episode to include it and other similar stories

@whateverwhatever4026 Ай бұрын

Definitely the parents' fault. I was taught from a very young age...to pull back even just to pee and obviously wash too. I'm completely against...snipping, but that goes with the assumption that parents are teaching their kids to wash themselves. Wth.

@haunted5311 Ай бұрын

I'm snipped and the fact that I will never know what it's like to be fully intact as a man has scarred me both mentally, and (LITERALLY) physically. What a disgusting practice, it's astonishing to me just how normalized it is in America.

@fancydeer Ай бұрын

fr a failure of the parents, not the kids' fault in this one. the kids were lucky they didn't get an infection or something

@StoneBox_761a Ай бұрын

im glad i got snipped.

@derp195 Ай бұрын

Honestly, the fact that my parents decided FOR ME that they would cut off part of my genitals and think nothing of it makes me really angry. It's barbaric, and I can't believe it's legal to do without a medical reason to do so.

@haunted5311 Ай бұрын

@@fancydeer there are recorded circumcisions that were so botched that the kid needed to get their penis amputated. Look up the kid who's snip got so botched the docs tried to "turn him into a girl", the kid ends up commiting self deletion later on when he finds out. Not to mention all the men who suffer from lack of pleasure, botched circumcisions resulting in pain, erectile dysfunction, ect. I could give like 100 more objectively negative effects of normal or botched circumcisions alike, but nobody's got time to read all that lol. I can tell ya if you're truly interested though. It's genuinely horrifying, also the reason why it became a common practice makes my fucking skin crawl and my blood boil. I researched the topic obsessively for a short period of my childhood to learn everything I could about it, and it only lead to extreme anger and disgust. It was one of the first subjects that taught me the reality of modern society, and I kind of wish I could go back to blissful ignorance honestly.

@kingcosworth2643 Ай бұрын

2:52, learning the word 'todger'. It's always good to see someone grow as a person and learn the ways of the world.

@EternallyBlu Ай бұрын

BBC was NOT the source I needed to hear that rapper's story.

@pablowentscobar Ай бұрын

FYI "Cooked in kitchens local to me in NY" = A migrant in a bathroom with a hotplate.

@Gun5hip Ай бұрын

On the floor with no shoes on touching the food

@ballbagchris6920 Ай бұрын

“Hell’s Kitchen”

@ChucksSEADnDEAD 26 күн бұрын

You're lucky it's not a clothes iron turned upside down.

@MorningStarMidnightSun Ай бұрын

Me & my old guitar shop coworkers came up with “Urethral Prolapse” as a potential (unflourished) future project in about 2017, sorry Justin

@manwithnoname3024 Ай бұрын

Uhhh...shit that never happened for 25000 Alex

@MorningStarMidnightSun Ай бұрын

@@manwithnoname3024 I can (try) assure you this conversation genuinely happened, I think it stemmed from some of the guys wondering if the female urethra can prolapse lol

@MorningStarMidnightSun Ай бұрын

@@manwithnoname3024 I can (try) assure you that this conversation genuinely happened, I think it stemmed from some of the guys wondering if it could happen to women lol

@MorningStarMidnightSun Ай бұрын

I can (try) assure you that this conversation genuinely happened, I think it stemmed from some of the guys wondering if it could happen to women lol, “Uterine Prolapse” just didn’t have the same ring to it y’know

@treymoment Ай бұрын

@@manwithnoname3024 if they made it I'd understand this reply. But op's comment is kinda believable

@jasond.b-w Ай бұрын

I’ve thoroughly mutilated my stuff and lost some bits and pieces because of disabling Complex Developmental PTSD, but I can’t imagine losing something you actually wanted to keep, just to miseducation. I’ve even seen much older adults who insist that you don’t NEED to wash, not even just saying they didn’t know about it, and it always makes me wonder how they got that idea. Not being able to do ADLs is one thing, I get that, I have that problem myself-but not _knowing_ what to do means that someone seriously failed somewhere. It scary to think it can go to such extreme consequences. (Unrelated, breaks like 6:54 just make my entire day. Whang’s giggle deserves to be protected at all costs!)

@moredumbtoit5325 Ай бұрын

okay then 😬

@krisf4969 Ай бұрын

Pics or it didn't happen

@jessicam.5227 29 күн бұрын

I heard some people saying that too (that you don't need to wash your d*ck). I'm really curious if the smell never hit them and how did that come to their minds. Why would that be the only unwashable thing? Like the pee is not collecting under the skin and there's no sweat. Maybe it burns them or something, but so many guys use a random soap or shower gel so it's not surprising, but I don't really have experience with this (I'm a woman) so, if I'm wrong, don't blame me. I know that women shouldn't use soap

@cthuloso Ай бұрын

I can only describe the current state of your mustache as "near-surreal". A real achievement. Commendable.

@aerynventress7702 Ай бұрын

Fitting, as it does resemble Dali's.

@aibdan-si7fk Ай бұрын

“I couldn’t believe it” I’m dead lmao 😭

@JohnDoe-wq5eu Ай бұрын

I didn't know this is what I needed or wanted on a Friday but it is exactly that. Horrific and yet too fascinating to not get through all of them.

@Boozer13 Ай бұрын

5:41 For decades I thought smegma was a made up term. Meant to gross us kids out when we would talk about it. It wasn’t until literally today that I found out it’s a real word, and accurate. We’d been calling it by its appropriate name, thinking it’s slang, since elementary school. LoooooL. Thanks dood! Hahaha😂

@WDC_OSA Ай бұрын

For further clarification, please watch Bruno Powroznik's classic "Helmet Cheese"

@SJursa-ey4tt 28 күн бұрын

red dwarf

@ZimVader-0017 Ай бұрын

The sponsorship on this video, I cannot 😂 My ex-boyfriend had phimosis (not as severe as this guy, he could still pull it up a little to clean himself), but it was painful. He finally, after seeing two doctors, got an appointment with a urologist. He had to get a circumcision, which was also painful.

@FluffyFerretFarm Ай бұрын

First UK penile re-attachment and "it's unclear if it was successful"?!? 🙄

@fenchurchkahl9422 Ай бұрын

One other interesting community to mention are people that have a form of body dysmorphia where they wish to have their genitalia removed. There's a subreddit for it of people showing pics of their at home penectomy's, and sharing their experiences with it. There was even a man arrested recently who was cutting off genitalia for people in his residence - you can find videos of his "work" online. It's fascinating to read about how deep body dysmorphia can go.

@MM-jf1me Ай бұрын

That's so sad and scary to learn that these major DIY surgeries are being performed on such a large scale.

@JamesTirone-bd7rz 8 күн бұрын

Mf will always find something new that's dirty in 20 years the new things gonna be fucking floorboards and gluing your hair

@not_the_duster Ай бұрын

There was an incident where I am from about a guy that castrated himself. Later he castrated his boyfriend. The boyfriend died and he got criminal charges

@Son-of-Tyr Ай бұрын

Guy destroyed that restaurant's business in one fell slice...

@jerrys.9895 Ай бұрын

Moist dropped a story today of a twitch streamer whose dog shit worms onto a delivery customer's groceries and she just delivers it and move on, and I'm thinking there's a deep dive into the fallout of this story that will make for prime 20-years-from-now-Whang-content

@lukestockner4263 Ай бұрын

My mom was a nurse, she's retired. She taught me to clean under my foreskin. Shmegy was never my friend

@xoxollin Ай бұрын

hamilton morris' unchanging facial reaction is the best

@OhimeSama2019 Ай бұрын

It's nice to know that men have their own version of "holding your titty for no reason."

@dr.altoclef9255 5 күн бұрын

Oh other people do it? Good-

@Lil-Britches Ай бұрын

I just watched the Chicago video. "This is the one time when you shoot that guy" 😂 that commentary is gold

@Eldraphine Ай бұрын

Where is my foreskin mother?

@css1323 Ай бұрын

Heh. His name’s Whang.

@leviheidle524 Ай бұрын

“Mastabation” Dude is Carl Brutananadilewski 😂

@Damonnanashi Ай бұрын

Holy shit, that Afrin commercial just fucking blasted me with nostalgia. It's always friggin commercials that do that to me for some reason.

@Dover78 Ай бұрын

I picked up the habit in high school during football. Our season ran through the coldest part of the year and most of us just got into the habit of cupping God's Handwarmer on the sidelines to keep our hands warm.

@regular_mason8082 Ай бұрын

The part about the guy bleeding out in a bucket actually got me. My stomach started to churn.

@XneverstopfightingX Ай бұрын

BEAUTIFUL and absolutely perfect song choice! Love it!

@Illhavesnakes Ай бұрын

I love getting whang notifications while watching whang compilations

@mariashadows1328 Ай бұрын

Women problems: putting soap where we shouldn't. Men problems: not using soap where they should 😂😂😂

@caydenhager4985 Ай бұрын

I’ve commented about it before but I challenge myself to eat to the latest Whang episode often and this one got me so close to changing it… You’re too good with descriptions Justin.

@somethingillregret Ай бұрын

The fact that rapper was taking 0 accountability and didn't think "hey if 3 different people have felt the need to get restraining orders on me maybe I should be a better person" and instead is explaining like he is just shows he still has to work. On himself a lot

@scoon2117 Ай бұрын

Mine is retracted into my body as i listen

@arubberroomwithrats Ай бұрын

realest video ive seen

@snorlax6691 Ай бұрын

Dear gods… that second story about not washing down there… even my 5 year old is learning about that, since he couldn’t be circumcised due to medical reasons, and even he’ll retract it when he’s in the shower. A silly little 5 year old who thinks more about Blippi and toys more than anything still has an idea of what to do to keep himself clean! Jeez what are parents thinking???

@dancoroian1 Ай бұрын

Such a pleasant and captivating seemingly non sequitur intro...only to segue into some of the most horrific shit imaginable. Never change, Justin! 💛

@kaijusdad6220 Ай бұрын

A certified Whang banger

@kaseythekannibal Ай бұрын

Whanger.

@MrMegaManFan Ай бұрын

I'm not normally one to pick apart sponsored plugs, but who exactly is CookUnity mad at when they say "It's not slop produced in a warehouse?" Who is that a jab at? HelloFresh? Inquiring minds want to know.

@michaelfrancoeur9875 Ай бұрын

Your vids are always super entertaining, Urethral Prolapse! Awesome, you know someone is gonna take that now!

@user-yv8cy1nm4v Ай бұрын

Just subscribed!! I just randomly ran across your chanel and this is my first video with you!! Let me tell why i was drawn to you....i wear 2 hearing aides and have since i was 6 years old (I am 61 now) i have high pitch deafness so bass sounds are pleasing to my ears. Your voice is AWESOME!! The tone, the volume, your speech pattern and pronunciation!! Amazing to listen to!! Thank you!! From Salem Oregon!! (Not to mention you are very easy on the eyes).....

@user-ge5vf5md7r Ай бұрын

Whang! Talking about people who cut off Whangs!

@st.anselmsfire3547 Ай бұрын

Who the hell goes through life without ever washing their junk? Did their parents teach them anything about bathing? Start from your head and work your way to your toes. Do not forget your junk - you sweat down there constantly. This is just part of life! If you don't keep it clean, it's going to start getting nasty. How is this not a self-correcting problem?

@twstdtransstr Ай бұрын

I love your channel a lot man, I’ve been watching for a long time.

@KomradZX1989 Ай бұрын

Dude the fact you get sponsors for the kind of content you do amazes me 😂. I watch all your stuff and you either leave me with a smile at the end or a look of disgust 😅. Regardless of which I always come back! Keep up the awesome work man you rock ❤

@christopherstudebaker5002 Ай бұрын

I have so much empathy for the foreskin men who didn’t know to clean it. Poor guys.

@cooliipie Ай бұрын

Thank God I'm cut

@sillygal3034 Ай бұрын

Ong so glad im cut (im a girl)

@ZalYagunRyai Ай бұрын

Hey, my sister worked with the initial doctor that the rapper who cut his johnson went to. She did tell me they couldnt save it but they probably wouldn't have known what happened after

@Eeveelyn Ай бұрын

So either she or the doctor broke patient confidentiality?

@Danny___Riot Ай бұрын

Bravo Whang! Hahaha what an excellent video I wouldn’t expect anything less from you than this. 💖

@Jmack7861 Ай бұрын

As a nurse I’ve had so many patients that are like 10-16 that get UTIs and other infections from not cleaning correctly. If you aren’t circumcised clean that shit daily. And for the afrin- it’s a vasoconstrictor. Amazing for stuffy sinuses, actually the only allergy medicine I’ve found that actually helps with stuffy sinuses. Anyway, it can be the same problem as epinephrine- can cut off circulation too long if applied in the wrong locations and cause huge issues.

@futurewario9591 Ай бұрын

GOTTA KEEP YOUR WHANG! SAFE

@LotusDecember Ай бұрын

do NOT diy your bottom surgery, folks!

@treymoment Ай бұрын

It wouldn't even look like a vagina it would just look like a round meat hole 💀

@Sentient.A.I. Ай бұрын

there is too many delivered meals today. Its so cheap to make your own food

@Nick-Lab Ай бұрын

Do you think circumcision was invented because people back in the day found it easier to cut it off rather than have that convo with their son? Lol

@karlajaeger2082 Ай бұрын

Probably. Since it's popular mostly in dry arid climates i assume it's because of a lack water. If you're constantly on the search for water, bathing isn't exactly practical.

@lordfriedrick7911 Ай бұрын

Someday someone should compile all of the text of Whang like in 2:53 in a single big compendium of what he's capable or knolwedgeable or capable Like in this case he just learned the word "Todger"

@accidental.district Ай бұрын

Just woke up. Having this for breakfast thx Whang

@CEOofWasrael Ай бұрын

Good morning 😎 It’s bed time for me

@caitchri2426 Ай бұрын

I don’t think some of these men will have cheerful mornings anymore. :(

@isaacbrown7829 Ай бұрын

Pair the first half with a grilled cheese

@person6870 Ай бұрын

Now this is the kind of quality content I expect from a channel called "Whang!"

@trashcat3000 Ай бұрын

I used to work at Zizzi and I was always told that this guy was or had been a chef there and he had done this because his girlfriend had left him.

@ShooterMcgavin119 Ай бұрын

I literally just got off work for the weekend, my wife is making home made club sandwiches and home fries, and there is a new whang video. Life is good.

@CEOofWasrael Ай бұрын

Fuck yea😎 we just ordered pizza.

@lShishkaBerryl Ай бұрын

I'm about to dine on the sublime Kraft Dinnah

@p-__ Ай бұрын

My farts are better than Whang's farts.

@cherryhazard8002 Ай бұрын

That's a good wife you got there!

@aheenobarbushenocied9880 Ай бұрын

Things that never happened:

@SirSkrall Ай бұрын

I've always thought *"Testicular Vericose Vein"* Would be a really good band name.

@AmieMorley-st6tz Ай бұрын

Yknow I've never actually considered the fact that varicose veins can appear in the testicles too...

@Thor_b Ай бұрын

Needed this 😮‍💨

@seikou1762 Ай бұрын

tfw I genuinely couldnt tell where the ad ended and the video started, cookunity really do be serving wild stuff

@masterofbloopers Ай бұрын

Hearing that second story makes me so glad I'm circumcised.

@juIianstag Ай бұрын

are you a silent hill character by chance

@TheDigitalApple Ай бұрын

Have you edited any Wikipedia’s in the last 73 hours?

@r.a.fgattaiguy845 Ай бұрын

no I don´t want your doll thank you sir

@ryanpenrod1859 Ай бұрын

I'd say the phimosis non-diagnosis is also partly the child's doctor's fault. My pediatrician actually told me about this and how to prevent it, hence I never had a problem with it. My parents didn't tell me anything about it, probably because they didn't know--my dad had his foreskin stolen at birth :(

@ssgoko88 Ай бұрын

A bandit with a black mask saunters away from the natal ward at the hospital swinging your dad's foreskin on his finger like a key ring. LMAO.

@randomcanadian6298 Ай бұрын

I just have a mental image of a dude sneaking into the natal ward skyrim style, stealing the equipped foreskin and fast-travelling away

@AmieMorley-st6tz Ай бұрын

I'm sorry I know it's a serious subject but the way you worded that made me giggle 😂

@axelprino Ай бұрын

I had an urinary infection when I was a kid because of bad hygiene but I was like 6 years old, not a teenager, sheesh. In my case it wasn't so much that my parents had neglected explaining things to me but rather that they didn't realize that I did not understand the instructions properly because I was a kid and I didn't know anatomy at that age, then a doctor explained it to me in a more idiot-proof manner and that solved it.

@elcidgaming 23 күн бұрын

Smegma stuck is super common. As a nurse I sometimes assist in free circumcision programs. Some of then the kids had to be sent back home since they have not been retracted and the smegma is still stuck. the mother or the father with the kid would usually be scolded by the head health worker who will say "we told you to clean it first before taking the kid here"