As a stay at home father I know it's not normal but it always kind of hurts that everyone just assumes the people who are taking care of the kids are "mums." On the otherhand, I love these concepts! They have completely changed the dynamic of my family and I cried a couple nights ago when my daughter hugged me and said " I love you so much daddy, thank you for not yelling anymore." 😭😊🕺 I know it sounds so basic but to see our two sets of twins flourish under this has "filled my cup so to say?"

I'm a 25 years old man and I love motherhood/ parenting videos.

Hi SJ, I'm an avid watcher of your channel and I never comment, but this video really touched me. I'm only 21 and have no plans of having children for at least another 5 years but I really enjoy watching videos about parenting as I'm super interested in early years development, psychologically and linguistically (your speech delay content has been fascinating). I was brought up in a very violent abusive household and there was a lot of conflict between my parents and between them and myself and it has really impacted me as I've grown up. I suffer with severe anxiety and PTSD because of this and am often triggered by parents shouting at their children in public places. Watching videos on topics like this is really important for me as I'd love to have children of my own but I worry that my instinct will be to parent in a similar way that I was, but videos like this give me reassurance that I can teach myself out of angry/short tempered habits and raise children how I would have liked to be raised and give them the childhood that I missed out on. I particularly love your vlogs where we get to see how you interact with your children with so much kindness and respect. So really just a BIG thank you for being an amazing parent and putting this content out there xx

Loved this video, SJ. I don't even have children yet and you're really the only 'mum vlogger' that I watch religiously. Your videos are so cosy and have such an authentic feel, and I'm picking up so many tips for the future. Discovered your channel via Gabbie a couple of months ago and I'm addicted. Thanks so much for your content x

Love this, I’m a first time mum with an 18 month old and another due in 9 weeks, I’ve been dreading how to discipline/reward them and not become a mum that’s just shouting all time! X

My Niece is a “gentle parenting” child and she is an absolute wild child… if she could reach the Chandelier and swing from it she would… setting expectations and remaining consistent is the key to parenting.

I feel like the attention thing applies in adult relationships as well. There are many times when I am out with friends and they are on their phones texting other people or on Facebook ect. I don't think it is too much to ask that the friend put down their phone and pay attention to the person in front of them.

I work in the care sector with individuals with intellectual disabilities, and I feel a lot of the principles that I work with translate well toward a gentle parenting style. (Which I'm interested in following when I eventually have children). Obviously sanction and rewards are huge no-nos because that's seen as manipulation. I also brought up the 'attention seeking' point in my recent Positive Behaviour Support training. It's so important to anyone to have attention and feel seen/heard by people! If someone is 'seeking' attention then they're obviously not getting the right positive attention they need. Why not give it to them? I really appreciate this video and spreading the word. Thank you x

This video came up in my suggested feed, and love it! I'm not a parent (yet, hopefully one day) but I'm a preschool teacher and taught infants and toddlers for many years. Within my worklife, I wholeheartedly believe in respectful practice or peaceful parenting as it may be called when you're a parent - the principle is the same. Janet Lansbury is also an amazing resource...and look up the Pikler/RIE philosophy. It's amazing what children are capable of when you give them empowerment over their choices, to lead with kindness and are respectful of their ways of doing things. I always say to children ''you don't have to be everyone's friend, but you have to be kind to everyone.'' I also believe in children making their own choices within a limit. I.e ''I need to change your nappy. Do you want to go now or in 5 minutes? It has been 5 minutes you need to come now to change it...do you want to choose a nappy? Do you want to walk to the change area or do you want me to carry you? I can see you don't want to leave your toy because you look worried that (other child) might play with it. Let's find a high spot for it, so you can have it back after we're done.'' All these little choices are encouraging children to be partners in their care routine and learning. When you collaborate with children, it makes it all so much easier...but it's also teaching them that their opinions, thoughts and choices matter. That they can have control, choice and respect over their own lives and actions, like any other person. After all, how can we expect children/teens/adults to be confident making decisions and choices when they haven't had opportunities to practice?

Thank you for this video. This is pretty much how I was raised and it's really nice to see it explained in a few key points for others to hopefully learn and take on. So many people don't show their children any respect and it's very sad to witness.

Love this video! Especially “try a little tenderness” it really does work. Xx

I’m an aunt and I want to say the respect your children thing is 💯. I don’t understand how children would learn what respect is if they aren’t shown it. Kids have no context., they need to be taught.

Thank you for this SJ. My son is only 11 months old and I'm already feeling pressure to discipline (particularly from my parents generation) but I know he doesn't understand just yet and I don't believe that it is actually naughty/bad behaviour. You've given me some things to think about going forward xxx

I love this. Really inspiring - I definitely need to work on a few of these! Only just started following you but I find your videos so calming and soothing! I’m sure lots of people say the same! xxx

Love love love this

Love this topic, so thought provoking and it's always a case of easier said than done but this is a great reminder of how we ought to treat each other and prioritise the time we have together as families!

Thank you Abbie Baker, that's a really kind thing to say!! I'm far from the perfect parent, but like most parents, I'm just trying to find what works for me xx

Needed to watch this today! Day 3 of solo parenting and feeling slightly frustrated and overwhelmed (2 year old testing!!) but I completely believe this way of thinking. They are all individual and kindness rules x

Love this SJ! I adore everything about this way of parenting and you explained in beautifully as always.

I needed this video today 🙌🧡 thanks SJ

Sj I absolutely love all your videos about gentle parenting. I'm not going to lie as it takes ne time to slowly get there, but you definitely make good changes in my behaviour and at the same time in my toddler behaviour too. Thank you so much ❤️

Really needed these videos, thank you for sharing the tips, I really need to start using these techniques xx

I brought up my kids trying to prepare them for the often harsh realities of life, and that meant simply giving out reward and discipline on a sliding scale depending on their actions so they understood that everything in life must be earned.

Thank you for making this video! I grew up with really harsh parents, and wish this video existed when I was little. I think this video will help many people, and will make several children’s childhood much easier! Props to you!

Loved this video. It’s definitely made me think!! Xxx

Thank you for creating this channel.

Thank youuuuu for sharing your thoughts! As parents of an awesome highly sensitive kiddo been practising this but were new to the concept of gentle / positive parenting ✨✨✨

This is a great video, thanks for sharing this. I love the gentle parenting principles 💕

I truly needed this today thank you for your kind and understanding way of giving this information ❤️

Love this SJ! Thanks for making this video. I keep meaning to do more research on gentle parenting - our kids (5& almost 7) have just started fighting with each other a lot and I’m finding it hard to know what to do so this is such a timely reminder. I loved the kindness starts at home motto.

All great! Re: #3 DON’T allow one child to persistently bully another in the name of “letting them work things out”!

Love this thank you xx your accent is so strong here compared to now xx

Hi SJ! Happy Friday. Thanks so much for this video. All the tips and advice is spot on. I find getting the children fed in the mornings (neither of them have much of an appetite for breakfast) and out the door a bit of a challenge. I tend to get up really early to get myself ready and then concentrate on getting the children ready. Sometimes we have a ‘race’ who can get dressed/their shoes on first to try and make it fun. I also like to leave a bit of extra time in case someone has a paddy and then we have time to calm things down before we need to get out the door. I also find that lead up to tea time after school a bit of a struggle. They are hungry and ratty (me too sometimes!) but as you say a kind word more than often turns things around! Thanks again for all the kind advice. Hope you have a fabulous weekend x x x

Very refreshing to hear. Will take a lot away from this and thanks for your honesty! Sometimes a reminder is very much needed. My first child turned 2 today, and I know he’s got a big year ahead for him so this was nice to watch to just refocus and reboot for the next push. It’s a beautiful thing creating tiny humans, and well done to ALL doing it and doing their best. ⭐️

Amazing way of parenting. Great video. I think the attention one is really important because I feel that you should spend time with your children when they want your attention. I know it can be difficult when you are busy with work, chores ect xx

My favorite thing to say to people In close to is "you're safe." I don't know why, but that's always something that feels important to let them know.

Love your ideas on this, thank you! I love your sweater too!

This is great I relate a lot to this not because I do these technics but because I feel like I do the opposite and that’s why Scarlett my almost 4 year old is very needy and does things that she knows she shouldn’t for attention. Thank you I’m going to put these into practice xxxx

i am currently pregnant with my first baby! i'm 5 months with my baby girl Zahra, i'd love more videos like this to look up to for our future. great video!!!! :)

This is going to be interesting x

I don’t know where my son gets it from but I have been too gentle apparently because he is now 4 and is so disrespectful and nasty toward me. I have tried using words and explaining how to behave but have had to resort to time out and taking privileges away because he doesn’t listen whatsoever. It has become this way since I’ve had my baby who is now 8 months old. Before, he was fairly manageable but his hyper behavior did get out of hand at times. He is just so high energy and wants my attention all of his waking hours. I am just at my wits’ end.

I'm new to some of this as it's completely antithetical to the way I was raised. I need to learn more about this way of parenting because my kids deserve better than I had.

Totally agree with everything in this video. Thank you. I’ve read these principles myself and apply them with my toddler. Totally relate to what you’re say. Ps: always watch your videos and love the new hair colour 😄.

This is so inspiring, SJ. I don't have kids yet, but I already want to raise them like you do.

Love this! I don’t have children myself but have 2 nieces, 3 nephews and 6 god children who I look after regularly (sometimes all at once, yes I know I’m crazy lol) and follow similar “rules” when I have them. ❤️❤️❤️

Any people out there with no kids yet or even of you do ( never too late) but as a mum i'd definitely recommend going to therapy/ go on a little journey of emotional healing.. before having kids ideally... I felt very triggered after having kids emotionally.. try and get yourself sorted as much as possible before them... Obviously won't all be perfect but I say to friends all the time.. it's SO worth doing!! Makes parenting much easier.. still have therapy etc. Now but at least get started and practice self care so always got on the side of parenting 💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

I am super fatigued now that I’m pregnant, the best thing I did was teach my nephew who I care for how to be responsible and set an alarm for school. Now I don’t have to fuss about him not wanting to wake up. Ever since he started using it he just gets out of bed on his own. He is in the 4th grade and does a better job of waking up with an alarm than me lol.

Wow such a great video and perspective. I am a new mom and I am hoping to adopt these principles.

Great video, absolutely loved it xx

You're Always so sweet SJ and one thing I noticed is that of course you love your kids equally but is almost like you are three different SJ's and you are with each one of them. Maybe it can sound weird but I mean it as a compliment, means that you know them so well, you care about their differences and personalities and that you can adapt. It's amazing to watch ! You're doing a great job as a mummy xx

Really needed this video... I have found myself being an angry mum I feel I'm always shouting at my kids since my third baby has come along and I know it must be hard on the other 2. My goal for this year is to cooperate better with my kids everything this video is about really. So thank you ♥

I needed to hear this today - I spent over an hour trying to make a crying baby sleep because ‘he hadn’t slept enough today’, ‘the book says he needs sleep’, ‘I’ll pay for it later if he doesn’t sleep now’. I need to maybe look at baby led sleeping 🥱

Great topic! I love your videos especially your most recent ones about your sons speech delay because I am going through services right now with my 3 year old and it is very emotional for me. I was wondering if you find it more difficult to explain certain things regarding discipline or feel more lenient with him because of this delay? I just feel like I do that with her because I don’t know how much she understands but I want to set appropriate boundaries and help her to process things successfully. Hope this makes sense and thank you for opening up about it because it is very difficult to go through.

A lovely video - taken away a lot to try with the children I teach also X

You’re such a calm mother always inspire me..what is the book called you read? I would Definitely like to read..looking forward to hearing your techniques for misbehaviour..have you read Buddhism for motherhood...that’s a great book on how to be present with your children and deal with the hard moments of motherhood xx

Such an interesting video! I’m only a year into parenthood, but already consciously am making decisions on how we want to parent... so many of these points are just good things to live by generally right?! I’m going to try and be really aware and make sure I stick to these- especially the attention bit! X

Very helpful video! I'm an aunt trying not to confuse or accidentally traumatize my nephew lol. Also, unrelated, but you look just like the lovely actress Saoirse Ronan!

Hi SJ! I love your videos. Our little girl is 6 months and I’m starting to look into positive parenting, what books would you recommend for research? Thank you 💗

Amazing tips, oh I needed it, thank you so much! Could we have more on parenting?? I follow you for some time now, must admit that I find your "name films" a bit boring and so tend not to watch them, however weight loss and CP I owe to you dear SJ! You have been true insiration to me with your weight loss and I am now also a big fan of CP! Love it! You are lovely! Hugs xxxx

What’s the original source material for gentle parenting, is it a specific book?? It’s just you reference ‘her’ and she in the video and I’d like to look into this more. I’m a mental health nurse and really into ensuring I raise my children in a way that builds resilience and I think this style of parenting could fit in very well with that. Thanks

Wonderful video and really helpful tips 👍🏼

I need to work on the last one the most. Like most I grew up with old school parents so they were very tough. I am trying to find a balance and take a more gentle approach.

Loved this SJ. Thank you, I need to work on that last one too. I feel like I did always go straight to my 22 month old but since listening to other people I have been doing it less and making him wait 5 minutes while I finish washing up for example. I’m 31 weeks pregnant and everyone keeps saying I need to stop attending to his every need because once the new baby comes I won’t be able to. This really worries me because I don’t want him to feel like I’m all of a sudden ignoring him. This video is how I want to parent. Do you ever feel like you can’t split yourself evenly between your kids when they all want you? Any tips on how to? Thanks again, love your channel xxx

Is there a reasearch about gentle parenting or an article? I want to write a thesis about this topic but don't know where to find solid evidance/proof other than youtube/tiktok videos and blogs.

I absolutely loved this video xx thankyou for taking 9Now this topic, I’d love to be more gentle with the kids. I have 4 and often am rushing around or trying to watch a tv show at really the wrong times and I tell them I can’t do this or that because I’m busy or listening.... I should stop more and b3 calm with them. I grew up with very busy parents. My mother never say still or played with us and my dad was always talking about work when he was home or reading the newspaper for hours upon hours. He did spend awesome quality time with us on the weekends though, at grandmas house, but I feel I have copied my mums frantic behaviour. It isn’t good. Have you seen The Parenting Junkie? She has a channel here and a podcast now. She has a video on needy or clingy children, and it is very good, it might help with the baby xxx

I have this book and its almost like you need to reread it all the time to keep at it and remind yourself 💕 - would also recommend Raising Girls by Stephen biddulph, they have a boys one too

May I ask what book/ resources you are talking from. This is incredible Thankyou for this knowledge you are passing on.

Explained beautifully. I'm trying so hard to break away from a job/chore I'm doing when the kids ask rather than asking them to wait. My 2 year old boy has a speech delay and I feel guilty like it's my fault because he's 2nd child I don't feel he got the same attention my first did. Xx

what book are you mentioning?

I find the older generation are far more judgmental when it comes to discipline. I once had a man shout at my child to be quiet and then proceed to tell me that I had no control, because I was trying to figure out what was triggering my child rather than screaming at him. Definitely going to try and work on the quality time; being a full time teacher/mum can be very hard sometimes xx

Can I ask what is the book you are referring to ?

🌙💚

I'm a mum of 3, my eldest being nearly 11 and I feel like I've failed my eldest two children as I wasn't gentle parented and I don't gentle parent them. I have anxiety, I shout, I swear and I get angry and I'm honestly worried that it's too late to change. Our youngest is 1 so I feel like I can change for him but I just feel bad for my oldest 2...Any advice? Xx

Hello, ❤️ I didn’t hear it in the video, but where did you read about the 6 principles? Is it a book?

would you recommend Gentle Parenting for a kid with ADHD?

I have a two year old son who will not listen to me when i try telling him what he’s doing is not okay. He will scream and stretch his body out and not listen. I don’t know how to teach him the breathing method to calm him down. He has a speech delay as well so he doesn’t speak just babbles. I used to spank him but I’m trying my best to not do that anymore so he can better express his feelings.

SJ you keep referring to "she" is that a founder of this type of parenting? Could you please provide a name or a book?

Billie Eilish's parents used gentle parenting.

Do you ever worry that this may raise "snowflakes" (as they say)? I live in the north of Scotland and things are shall we say, quite blunt/black & white here I guess, especially with the older generation. My parents weren't harsh compared to some, and I noticed that I couldn't handle the angry type of discipline that I witnessed with other children's parents. But even still with my background, as a 37 year old I look around and see many children these days who just don't look like they can handle anything, they're very delicate/sensitive? 🤔

Is this a joke?

Fake

This is complete and utter crap