What Women Don’t Want To Hear about 50/50 relationships!

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@Leydo773 6 ай бұрын

I think the issue that woman have with 50/50 is that woman are working just as much as the man & contributing financially but then coming home and doing 100% of the housework and child care. This is coming from a married mother who works full time. A lot of men use providing as an excuse not to help around the house.

@queenkeesh8660 6 ай бұрын

Correct if I’m a housewife I can only do that full time without working if I work to I’m not being only one cookin n cleaning n helping the kids but the father should be able to help with kids homework baths from time to time for bonding it’s his kids too

@Isa-Amor 6 ай бұрын

Facts

@RemIsNice 6 ай бұрын

Respectfully, this is often NOT the case. I live in a middle to upper middle class neighborhood. Most of the families could survive with a single income but most have dual incomes. Most of the men do yard work as well as home maintenance. Most of these families actually have maid services that clean up the house. Ultimately, what I'm saying is that you'll find plenty of millennial men that contribute sufficiently to the household duties.

@Isa-Amor 6 ай бұрын

@@RemIsNice you might want to come out of Pleasantville cuz majority of women out here are having the same complaints. Im sure these women wish they can afford maid service to help them out cuz the men ain't doing it.

@ITSCRYSTALRENEE 6 ай бұрын

I was married also and my ex wasn't providing, he wasn't doing ish around the house. He was my 3 rd child ain't nobody got time for that

@BlackCatholicGirl 6 ай бұрын

I will agree with RC BLAKES on that one..a man wanting 50/50 is a bozo period.

@1racethehumanrace946 6 ай бұрын

Me too.

@tomaradoss3420 6 ай бұрын

Unless that’s just the financial circumstances they are in at the time. Otherwise 50/50 sounds a bit selfish coming from a man, that can provide.

@Key-Key444 6 ай бұрын

Same

@EsiriE 6 ай бұрын

I think reasonable women should contribute. It doesn’t necessarily mean equally. But women should contribute tbh. I always think of my brothers in situations like this and I wouldn’t want them drowning in bills while their wife feels she shouldn’t have to contribute anything.

@nzingahoney 6 ай бұрын

@EsiriE I think your brothers should aim for it though. A woman is freed to do a lot fir husband and home when she doesn't have to worry about money.

@goodgirlgonerich 6 ай бұрын

I agree with the sentiment that a husband and wife should be partners, in every sense of the word. The problem starts to rear it's ugly head when the man works, and the woman works... But the man also expects the woman who works to work, cook, clean, help the kids with homework, give them baths, put them to bed and then take care of her wifely duties. Then it becomes a demand on us instead of a partnership. Then, the man works so hard ( physically) that he is tired, and wants to be pleased but puts no energy into pleasing his wife after SHE worked, helped the kids with homework, cooked, gave them baths, ect. Not to mention we have to dedicate time for God, praying, rebuking, meditating... It becomes 75/25 or 80/20. It never actually gets to 50/50 or 100/100... We just want acknowledgement that our role and duties matter. We want our efforts in lovemaking to be reciprocal. We just want our man to invest as much emotionally as we do. So we can be on the same page in our journey and purpose.

@deasyastarr 6 ай бұрын

Right this video ignores this so bad. So many women, especially black women, over decades have complained about it not truly being 50/50 for real. That’s really when infidelity happens, the wife is worn down so bad that she neglects her looks and doesn’t want to be touched so the husband goes out to cheat. And a lot of the time, we don’t know what we’re getting into until we’re in the marriage already and having to deal with it.

@originalmix2546 6 ай бұрын

exactly!!

@YourOpinionIsNotFact 6 ай бұрын

Did you hear what he said, he said if it’s 50/50 then the man should share the Household duties. Don’t get a man that’s wants you to pay 50/50 and wants you to do all the housework, that’s not the man for you.

@deasyastarr 6 ай бұрын

@@YourOpinionIsNotFact we don’t know what a man will do after getting married. Just cuz he says he’ll help with housework doesn’t mean he actually will or sometimes they’ll act like they’re incompetent just so they won’t be asked to help anymore. That’s a real thing.

@keelhe893 6 ай бұрын

I felt like Tony acknowledged your concerns but he was speaking to women who think they don’t have to work or contribute to the household because they are women due to this idea of a 100% provider man. It’s arrogant to assume someone wants to just care for you completely as an adult. All humans are flawed and if you have someone who helps you in anyway you should be thankful. Don’t settle for scraps but also don’t piss on good efforts.

@daniellesullivan5 6 ай бұрын

I’m single with no kids, and I’m swimming in cash 🙌🏾❤️💪🏾 Didn’t realize how blessed I was.

@Twister_numba24 6 ай бұрын

WE WINNING OVER HERE😂🎉👏🏾👏🏾

@daniellesullivan5 6 ай бұрын

@@Twister_numba24 okkkkkkurrrr, period 🙋🏾‍♀️💁🏾‍♀️

@cordneydriver316 6 ай бұрын

Me too 🙌🏾

@daniellesullivan5 6 ай бұрын

@@cordneydriver316 ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@simoneaustin8076 6 ай бұрын

more single woman are buying houses than single men lmfao and i know tons of woman that have 10k in savings including more than that' and that's my mother! hahaha like what😂better off single than with a dust bucket.

@peaceisgolden 5 ай бұрын

Im thankful for my husband. We started off as 50/50 in the beginning of our marriage, I had no problem with that because he always treated me like a Queen and helped around the house. Fast forward to now we are 80/20. He pays all the major bills, insurance, and for dates. I just do the grocery shopping & pay for miscellaneous things ❤

@PinkHypatia 6 ай бұрын

This is one of the few things that I disagree with Tony on. You’re supposed to live BELOW YOUR MEANS, unless you’re living in poverty. If you’re living in poverty, you shouldn’t be seeking a wife to join you until you have basic STABILITY. Regardless to the economy, a wife can’t fully respect a husband who won’t fully provide. I’ve lived this life, and it took sacrifice to live within my husband’s means. He was a security guard, but he INSISTED on being the sole provider, because he was taught this by a man who also lived this. I had my own money, and he refused to spend a dime of it on our household bills. I’m proud of him for that, and I’m proud of myself for being willing to sacrifice material luxuries, and keeping up with the Jones’s for a higher principle. Tony, I’ve heard you say that you don’t believe in living below your means. You want to live AT your means, and that’s fine for your family, but not a good financial or economic principle. Not living below your means means that the average person will always be strained and stressed out trying to keep above water. The man ALWAYS sacrifices some respect when he needs a woman to pay for basic NEEDS. The man also sacrifices some respect whenever he’s willing to work his wife just so that he can enjoy more luxuries. The women and children pay a price too. It’s definitely doable for those who live by a principle. Any man who can abstain from sex based on a principle, can definitely PAY ALL BILLS in any economy. Our forefathers did this, and took pride in it. Our modern men need to strengthen their will and resolve to be men, and us women must let them and REQUIRE them to be men. Yes, the wives must fulfill their domestic duties as well. If you are 50/50, then I agree that chores should be 50/50. But if we’re being honest, we must admit that masculinity isn’t wired that way.

@leegaleaglenombo9430 6 ай бұрын

This is the exact comment that I was looking for. ❤️

@MH-wj5ui 6 ай бұрын

You need to look at the cost of living. Below your means is not possible to live nicely.

@Joytheanointed1 6 ай бұрын

Classy and truthful response👏🏽

@taxcitybagtalk 6 ай бұрын

@MH-wj5ui everyone's MEANS isn't to live nicely.... what one person's life look like doesn't mean that's what everyone else's life should look like ESPECIALLY if they're not putting in the same amount of effort and performing at high levels

@MH-wj5ui 6 ай бұрын

@@taxcitybagtalk Your response is contradictory. Again, educating oneself on what it takes to live nicely and respectably is at an all time high due to inflation. People need to have realistic expectations of availability of partners that can provide on one income per family. A review of the middle class income and the cost of housing alone does not make this feasible to the majority.

@Hakeberdh 6 ай бұрын

I have a friend that left her guy because of 50/50. He makes 6 times the salary she make. This is unfair. She would literally be struggling while he is just fine. When incomes aren’t the same, it should be based off percentages.

@angelic4112 6 ай бұрын

Totally agree with you! 👏 I read about a male doctor who expected his girlfriend who was doing her residency, to pay him 50/50 rent towards his condo. So, she was earning way less, but contributing toward his condo without ownership in it and they could break up at anytime... 🤦🙄

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

This is why the 50/50 narrative is toxic as hell! He need to take this video down😂 he so damn manipulative “urinary tract infection” is wild and so extra.

@joanboger3327 6 ай бұрын

A husband that makes more than his wife should pay the bulk of the bill. (Mortgage) If you want a 50/50 partnership get a roommate. A good man provides for his family. A good woman manages the household makes a house a home. 💯

@Hakeberdh 6 ай бұрын

@@J_Elle30 I agree with Tony’s video. This situation doesn’t apply to the general audience he was targeting. I don’t think he would say to 50/50 in this situation. I brought this up because there are men like this that want to go 50/50 when it’s clearly unfair.

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

@@Hakeberdh I think 50/50 is more so when couples are younger and building, I wouldn’t tell older women who are dating to expect to go 50/50 with a man who is already taking care of his own bills. It makes zero sense.

@abyousocrazy358 6 ай бұрын

Well Mr. Gaskins I’m single no kids with my own mortgage, luxury car and have more than 10k in my bank account. Maybe that’s why I’m having a hard time dating?

@dii-N-sd 6 ай бұрын

I feel you, because all of us aren't broke. "My back account is sitting pretty" as my auntie used to say. If a man can't contribute or take care of me better than I can take care of myself, then what's the point? We can just be friends. 😂

@Ptah1130 6 ай бұрын

It isn't the things you have. It's the mindset you have about having those things. Not saying you do this, but maybe it carries over into your perception of who you think you are and what you think you should have. Men may feel you have an entitled attitude and you look down on them.

@texcoco41 6 ай бұрын

@@dii-N-sdIt doesn't sound like you want a husband 🤷🏾‍♀️

@texcoco41 6 ай бұрын

@@Ptah1130Exactly 💯

@Ptah1130 6 ай бұрын

@@dii-N-sd And that's where many ladies are today. "Friends."

@la6136 6 ай бұрын

50/50 isn't a problem if the man is also doing 50% of the domestic work and is taking care of the kids 50% of the time. The problem is that rarely happens. Women almost always end up sacrificing more in marriage and relationships. One of reasons I would never have kids with a man unless I was wealthy enough to hire a nanny and a part time maid so I can still pursue my purpose and career goals. Otherwise it isn't worth it for women who don't want to be a SAHM.

@queenkeesh8660 6 ай бұрын

Right don’t leave the domestic work out more likely man without character morals is going to get home same time kick off shoes n want u to handle the kids by urself just because ur the mom I dnt mind help payn bills n working a lot women are working now more then men

@JustAGalAndHerDog 6 ай бұрын

What’s a SAHM

@rayofsunshine1267 6 ай бұрын

@@JustAGalAndHerDog Stay at home mom

@JustAGalAndHerDog 6 ай бұрын

@@rayofsunshine1267 thank you I’m a dog mom so don’t know mommy acronyms.

@karenmcgee1869 6 ай бұрын

Yes!

@kimbery_love 6 ай бұрын

If my husband pays 100% of the bills, provides for all of my needs and I don’t have to work, what do you think I will do? Whatever he says!

@brxanashanae7879 6 ай бұрын

PERIOD!

@heyyashleyyy2669 6 ай бұрын

THANK YOU

@user-rx7uh9mg4f 6 ай бұрын

Especially if he’s good leader & sweet and loving. Of course I’ll be submissive and do whatever I can to please him

@PropheticEvangilticMin 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂🤣 someone asked me what am I bringing to the table but just because he asked me that question it was a no go. I do have something to bring to the table but if you have to ask me that question you’re not for me..

@ShanniSlayTV 6 ай бұрын

Yeah that’s corney to hear somthing like that it seems very rehearsed

@reina6542 6 ай бұрын

I agree

@Actavella 6 ай бұрын

Same here! I stopped talking to a guy who asked me that!

@Twister_numba24 6 ай бұрын

WORD SIS!!!

@J_Elle30 5 ай бұрын

I’m so glad so many women are blocking out the noise!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

Couples gotta do what works for them. 👌🏾

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

Just b/c we make more money don't mean we should spend more money. 💯

@dii-N-sd 6 ай бұрын

Exactly! Unfortunately, most ppl can't resist "lifestyle creep". The more they make, the more money they spend.

@Morgansaron 6 ай бұрын

This! 🙌 my parents are both accountants and they taught me to live off of 30K that I made waitressing all throughout college while being happy, fast forward 6 years later, I still live that way making way more with 2 degrees, child free and patiently waiting for my boyfriend to propose so we can move on to the next phase of life together, learning to live on 30K saved me in this economy.

@MiSSPiNk747 6 ай бұрын

Exactly, that's why so many people are hood rich and not wealthy.....📌📍‼️

@perdybirdie 6 ай бұрын

Agree. Tony should take some financial management and accounting classes sounds like. If they almost lost their home and keep having to sell purses, it may be time to reconsider getting them or downsizing.

@angelalittle7522 6 ай бұрын

I’m not doing 50/50, I’m sorry. I can just die alone.😂

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@TrendyT. 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂😂

@chatfrancois32 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂

@tawana251 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂

@taxcitybagtalk 6 ай бұрын

Not at this big ol age 🤣🤣💯

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

Now, lets do a video on how men take care of their mom and sisters but the wife is going without. 💯👌🏾

@sharisss2608 6 ай бұрын

Go watch universe guru she is very well versed on relationships and how to get your man to see you as a priority by invoking his emotional response like their family members do. They only do that for them because they known him longer but if you take that space they have to fall in line behind you. You can’t be threatened you have to come across as if you care bout them too but you make him see your needs as more important.

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

@@sharisss2608 I love Mina!

@onehappichic7099 6 ай бұрын

Also taking care of their grown children..

@Twister_numba24 6 ай бұрын

THAT PART!!!

@perdybirdie 6 ай бұрын

Christian men shouldn't be behaving this way. Now for secular men thats a whole other can of worms

@1racethehumanrace946 6 ай бұрын

For years, decades women (especially black women) have been paying and still expected to pay 50/50 of the finances. Which has often turned into the woman paying 80 percent, then 100 percent if the man looses his job or stops being consistently employed. Wanting to and having to pay 50/50 of finances are two different things. A woman shouldn't have to go 59/50 on finances if she doesn't want to. Especially taking care of children and the house most of the time.🙏🙏🙏

@DrKrysRacquel 6 ай бұрын

Many of us can take care of ourselves without a man. If the man cannot do anything for you besides intimacy and paying half the bills you are NOT gaining anything. The only thing that changes is you can afford a bigger space to live by having two incomes. You can have that with a roommate! Plus doing this 50/50 thing you end up with more meals to cook, more laundry, and more cleaning. Men aren’t as tidy as women on average, plus helping all the kids since we are better at it. I recommend all men and women look at the couples of men and women in their 60s/70s where the women worked full time. Almost every single time the woman looks way way way older than the man. That’s not fair to the woman! Women end up looking a mess when they have all that added stress!!! My husband pays the major household bills and I am willing to live within his means. When I was working at the start of the marriage (even from homr) I wasn’t able to be the best wife I could be and focus on my husband when I wanted to. As soon as I stopped working I got pregnant that same month!! And remember! For the man to even take you as a wife back in the day the man had to prove he could care for you and provide for you!

@EsiriE 6 ай бұрын

What you said about the women ending up looking a mess is sooo real 🤣 but women just get on with it and carry the load.

@easyw1220 5 ай бұрын

Back in what day? Life is very different today.

@ImOnlyWesso 5 ай бұрын

Yapanese

@MeekahLynne 6 ай бұрын

This is so spot on. Some women THINK they want a marriage where the man pays 100% but like you said you’re not just doing nothing. I’ll add if he’s trying REALLY trying, DONT LISTEN TO FAMILY regarding your partner. Stay the course.

@tomaradoss3420 6 ай бұрын

Women have been taught that a man’s love goes where his money goes. If he doesn’t want to share his money with her, she doesn’t feel that he really loves her. 50/50 for some men is not because they can’t afford it. For some it’s , I’m not sharing my money with you!

@user-rx7uh9mg4f 6 ай бұрын

He will spend that extra money on some side women that “didn’t let herself go” anyways .. yet be mad his wife is going 50/50 looking like a mess.

@VirtuousWoman1143 6 ай бұрын

I AM A PROVERBS 31 WOMAN. BEEN SINCE THE 1970'S !!! MY CANDLE DOES NOT GO OUT BY NIGHT.... LOYAL FAITHFUL GOOD COOK, CREATIVE, ENTREPRENEUR IAL, ETC. AND STILL ENDED UP ALONE TAKING CARE OF MY TWO KIDS. 😮

@MeekahLynne 6 ай бұрын

Off topic can you please speak on the 70 yr old man saying he’s FINALLY ready to “settle down” 😑 and “hospice wives”? I’m floored.

@moniquehall1920 6 ай бұрын

Yes! I woild love to hear Tony's perspective on the "Hospice Wife" finesse game that some men are playing!

@mindyann8903 6 ай бұрын

Oh my I’ve Not heard of this but am not surprised one bit ! 💀

@tameekaharris6425 6 ай бұрын

Wow that's crazy, would love to hear speak on that smh lol

@SoftWifeLife 6 ай бұрын

Tony’s right! My husband loves that I'm a stay-at-home wife and being a 100% provider. I'm stress-free and peaceful which in turn makes us both happy. 💅🏾

@tarawiselove 6 ай бұрын

Soft Wife Life is the best way.

@djredd1225 6 ай бұрын

I'm not married yet and don't have kids.These comments are a little scary..lol.Glad to see your comment....although I plan on contributing to the houusehold.

@tarawiselove 6 ай бұрын

@@djredd1225 Soft wife life does not mean not contributing.

@djredd1225 6 ай бұрын

@tarawiselove My apologies. I meant to say contribute financially just a little.

@tarawiselove 6 ай бұрын

@@djredd1225 Thank you for clarification, however, I must underline that even if a woman does not work a job, she can still contribute financially by uplifting her husband with her presence and the little things she does to make his life better. Incidentally, this is the reason why girlfriends get heartbroken after contributing to a man's success and the man leaves her in a better state than how she found him, while she is in a worse state. The presence of a woman, especially an excellent one, is contribution to a man's life, especially a forward-thinking husband.

@DivaDivine88 6 ай бұрын

I think Tony is absolutely right about a woman supporting her man (husband) in times of need, but i think he missed addressing the issue of so many men these days lacking ambition and direction..

@AKR892 6 ай бұрын

I come from a traditional African background and seeing what my mom went through I WANT to work. I’m too valuable not to. My gifts are meant to be shared and I’ll be damned if I don’t get paid well over six figures to share my gifts with the world. I’ll find a partner in due time. I just live my life in the meantime. You’re helping more lives than you know Tony. Your wife is a woman who is also touching lives because she speaks through you. Y’all have taught me so much and allow me to live my life in a genuine way. I’ll definitely book a session one day just to say thank you but in the meantime I enjoy hearing all of your viewpoints.

@passportheavy5505 6 ай бұрын

Most women are ok with 50/50 for bills. But are these men OK with 50/50 for household chores and responsibilities? That’s the real issue… some men want to only benefit from relationships. Share bills and not share household and child rearing duties

@BlackBeauty-yl8uq 5 ай бұрын

Not most women are ok with it. Some are. We are not wired to be ok with men who can’t be trusted with his finances or the capacity to lead his family.

@tru_kru_bahbee24 6 ай бұрын

Im fine with 80/20. If he falls on hard times, no problem.. i got him.. but I dont even think my man would allow me to pay 50/50 🤷🏾‍♀️

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

This video is a bit disappointing coming from Tony. You would think he would know how draining the 50/50 narrative is for so many women who are also mothers😒

@deasyastarr 6 ай бұрын

Yea usually I like his videos but this video came off very condescending and it dismisses the pain that so many women have had to endure in one sided marriages where the wife works and solely has to care for the home and children. I didn’t grow up with my parents splitting the bills 50/50. My dad paid the larger bills and my mom paid the smaller bills and that’s what I’m used to my dad being a provider so I’m not settling for less than that or I’ll be single. 🤷🏽‍♀️

@FragranceandBeautywithNonto 6 ай бұрын

Yes me too I was quite disappointed by this video, I’ve been a fan for a while. He does not understand how damaging 50/50 relationships can be when it comes to finances.His situation is an exception to the rule , not all men will remain faithful and stick with their woman just because they pitched in, in tough times whilst he is still building.

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

@@deasyastarr exactly! It’s not a foreign concept or far-fetched to expect a man to handle the bills in a marriage.

@J_Elle30 6 ай бұрын

@@FragranceandBeautywithNonto I feel the same, not about to be gaslighted to accept struggle love as a grown woman🤦🏾‍♀️

@deasyastarr 6 ай бұрын

@@FragranceandBeautywithNonto yea a lot of the times, men who are with women who are willing to be in the trenches with them, leave her for a woman he can feel more masculine with. And usually a broke man who needs his wife to go half with him in that way can be mean because who is happy when they don’t have anything? He had his wife and a baby in an apartment with barely any furniture, he’s the exception with how he repaid his wife for sticking by his side thru that.

@les8762 6 ай бұрын

Really appreciate your perspective on this Tony! I’ve had a lot of the same thoughts but couldn’t articulate them as clearly as you did here. Thank you!🙏🏼😊

@ITSCRYSTALRENEE 6 ай бұрын

This video I am not agreeing with, women can 100 percent take care of themselves and the ones that cant can go get a dusty man.

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

I was married to a man 30 yrs my senior and he said 50/50 was a roommate. 🤷🏾‍♀️

@LS-ph5qt 6 ай бұрын

Yup, I believe it. A lot of men from a particular generation felt this way. My neighbor was one of those men. His wife worked but he said he didn't need or want her money. He felt like that was "roommate" behavior.

@Bloom2Grow 6 ай бұрын

@@LS-ph5qtyou forget that was a different time and times have changed. The economy isn’t good right now and things are more expensive.

@Bloom2Grow 6 ай бұрын

@@LS-ph5qtplus, back then there was no such thing as a daycare…women had to stay home to look after the children and home. Everything was cooked homemade because there were no already prepared meals or fast foods. Women’s work was at home while the men left to work.

@LS-ph5qt 6 ай бұрын

@@Bloom2Grow Yes, that's true.

@WITHGODSGUIDANCEANDDIRECTION 6 ай бұрын

Yeah I think this is one of those “what works for you may not work for me. As a widow 8 years now. My husband and I was married 15 1/2 years when he passed 20 years together. Long story short we had the conversation before we married. I asked how he felt with me staying home. He said wait til he got to a particular place of income bracket. I agreed. GOD moved differently and I ended up home before time Hubby was not where he originally planned. He suggested I stayed at home and not go back after a series of events happened. Our FAITH was our currency! I always knew GOD had me and when I got married my FAITH never stop! We had GOD’S FAVOUR! Times were tight at times like most. We had two vehicles and a home built from the ground. It’s our heart posture and we both loved GOD. We weren’t perfect. GOD kept us. I always had my husband’s back and he always had mine. He even brought his checks home to me. We had shared accounts. So even direct deposits He brought the check receipts to me. Now I never was a gold digger so I’m sure he saw that right away. That makes a difference.

@Yoqyy 6 ай бұрын

My dad / grandad & uncle raised me to know men look after their women & my dad always said you shouldn’t have to ask a man for nothing …. They should just give , only bums ask for 50/50 they wouldn’t embarrass themselves to ask a woman for 50/50

@aceazar2806 6 ай бұрын

Yupp

@1Tim2_5 6 ай бұрын

My Dad provided (and still provides) for my Mom and their children (us). ***He never required my mom pay for anything NOR did he ever ask her, "What do you bring to the table?"*** ========================= My Dad said he was ready to get married and wanted to have a family (since he grew up as an only child with a single mother). ======================== Later in their marriage, my Mom did earn money ( part time---for herself --and for their teenage daughters (us)--and/or for anything extra), but only because she WANTED to (not because my Dad required her to do so). ======================== ======================= P.S. They did NOT have a big wedding/reception/party. ****They had a traditional ceremony in a church (wedding dress/suit/bridesmaids/etc.) and a little reception at a friends apartment.****They opted for a trip (honeymoon). ===================== ====================

@nikkisultimatejourney2744 6 ай бұрын

Omgeee!!! I’m totally sharing this! THANK YOU for this. This message is so needed. And I approve

@wandaporch238 6 ай бұрын

I am so glad he realized his home came first. His wife spoke the truth about his family's priorities being out of order. He truly loves his wife and family. God bless you both!

@LisaS483 6 ай бұрын

Marriage is a total partnership and each spouse has their role to play. My husband and I embrace pretty traditional gender roles so he works full time and pays all of our bills while I work part-time for ‘fun money’ (hair, nails, makeup, etc.) but I take care of pretty much everything at home. We are older though, so he’s had time to build a career that earns enough to pay for the household. That takes time. I left a six figure position to spend time at home with our young child and honestly, running a household is just as much work as any other full time job, if not more. My hubby barely has to lift a finger when he’s home and that’s an even exchange in our book. These ladies who want 100% providers are not wrong but I hope they are willing to play their own position in the household, and take care of everything. Also, not matter how much your man makes (mine makes in the mid $300k range) you still have to be responsible and live on a budget. Being with a provider doesn’t mean you have free range to just spend into oblivion on material items.

@darlenebernard4288 6 ай бұрын

I don't understand why a woman want a job to depend on their mate. Anything could happen to him and when it does, you should be in a financial place that can help take care of the bills just like he did. Not only that, if it doesn't work you lose yourself in that type of behavior. To each is on I just don't understand that thinking. Females don't think longevity.

@LisaS483 6 ай бұрын

@@darlenebernard4288 That's why my education (I have a master's degree) and work history are already established. If necessary, can get back into the working world very easily. Of course, I also have plenty of savings and life insurance as well just in case anything unforeseen happens. I am not going to let fear of what might happen keep me from enjoying my family and my life and my hustle days are over. I am happy to depend on my amazing husband.

@pinkishdiamondz 6 ай бұрын

I 100% agree with you. And I'm so happy for you💜

@BlackBeauty-yl8uq 5 ай бұрын

Sister, I’m 39 and been living traditional lifestyle since I married him at 19. It’s been 20 years and still in our traditional way. .

@mshunter6210 6 ай бұрын

Tonnnyyyy the way I screamed when you said because you got a “cooochie”😭Thank you for all that you do. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY🖤

@sergregorsigmillius7519 4 ай бұрын

This video really resonates with me, my girlfriend and I have been going on in 2 years. She has issued how she wants me to be more masculine and lead her and provide. I never necessarily saw myself as a provider because of how I was raised. Though with years of dating her I fell in love with her and also fell in love with taking care of her. But what’s making our relationship struggle is she always has something to complain about and always wants to criticize me when I feel like she hasn’t held up her end of the Bargain in our relationship. She doesn’t have a job, she dropped out of school and doesn’t really have any hobbies. So it’s hard to provide for someone who always has something to say and hasn’t proved to me yet that she’s willing to work for things and handle things on her own as well, because like you said in the video. We never know what will happen in the future with dark times, etc. Thank you for your wise words!

@keelhe893 6 ай бұрын

I am actually surprised at all the negative comments on what Tony is saying. I make 6-figures as a single woman and I realized that I must be willing to help out the house finances if needed. I see marriage as a team effort. It would be awesome for my husband to provide 100% but that is not realistic to expect in every season of life because life will life. Hard times come for everyone. I think 60-40 is still acceptable and 50-50 happens more than people on the internet assumes. At the end of the day I want an integral spouse who is all in for our family. That kinda man will do what it takes to provide for us and I am willing to help him accomplish that goal for our family.

@TheAttymom 4 ай бұрын

Preach Tony AND your candor and vulnerability is appreciated!! 🙏🏾❤

@Kmama801 6 ай бұрын

Both people have to contribute to a relationship in a manner where each person feels cared for. Very important message ❤️

@kittkat1996 6 ай бұрын

Tony i have listened to you for a while. This may be the only post that i do not agree with you. Some people are very happy with life not making A million dollars and having 5 cars in the garage. There is nothing wrong with having one car. As if that woman was less of a lady because she had one car. But she also didnt pay any bills in her home. Thats being financially savvy. Many of us are wise earners and financially smart. You seem to be profiling your assets in this post and expensive material items are only worldly possessions. Im a 6 figure single woman and I live very comfortable. You dont need to prove anything to anyone but your wife. Im not sure how bragging on your lifestyle is helpful here . . .😊

@Lolojey 6 ай бұрын

I agree 100%!!

@deardiadem 6 ай бұрын

This video just confirmed a whole lot for me. My instincts where right. My goodness. Wow. And in most culture the man pay for everything gladly. In my culture, it shows he can take care of his wife. A lot of single women that I know have more than 10k sitting in their accounts. This? Wow . Not surprised though.

@aceazar2806 6 ай бұрын

What were your instincts?

@ArashaSP 6 ай бұрын

💯 Spot on. We’re the only ethnic group debating this nonsense. Glad I was raised within a family were men lovingly, and without resentment provided for their household. We’re not mules.

@szedrielxo967 6 ай бұрын

I’m glad you spoke on this TG because honestly I got wrapped up in this spirit myself although I am the type of woman to help my man but I was getting caught up and you speaking on this truly opened my eyes cause no matter what in these times you really don’t know what can happened if anything changed financially I would hate for my man to feel like dang I’m all by myself or my wife may leave me because I can’t provide like I want to be be a safe space that we can work together to get back on top

@PropheticEvangilticMin 6 ай бұрын

Never despise humble beginnings. I got married, in the courthouse and took pictures.🤷🏾‍♀️❤️

@PropheticEvangilticMin 6 ай бұрын

@@juneelle370 thank you❤️

@texcoco41 6 ай бұрын

I did as well.

@jessicascreenwritingservices 6 ай бұрын

I hollered when he said “she-witch!” That’s exactly what they are though 💯 we’ve gotten so far away from what marriage really is and it’s so much delusion out here. Literally I saw a woman in her 30s saying she wants a man to come save her. Nobody is coming to save you. You have to save yourself.

@Joytheanointed1 6 ай бұрын

Yes you better call on Jesus to save you, not a human being.😭

@nakiaaddison8129 6 ай бұрын

I burst out laughing while reading she wants to be saved!! She needs to marry Jesus!

@jessicascreenwritingservices 6 ай бұрын

@@Joytheanointed1 exactly! It’s ridiculous

@jessicascreenwritingservices 6 ай бұрын

@@nakiaaddison8129 it was a woman on a dating show

@nakiaaddison8129 6 ай бұрын

@@jessicascreenwritingservices wow!

@laluna155 6 ай бұрын

God created men to provide so he should provide. If a woman wants to help him that should be her choice and not obligatory. Of course any good woman will help her man if he is struggling but that man must be her husband not her boyfriend.

@TrishaBurris 6 ай бұрын

I agree ☝️

@perdybirdie 6 ай бұрын

Agree. Plus Tony was talking about the early days of their marriage when they were early 20s. He himself said by the time he was 28 things were different.

@Angela-Renae 6 ай бұрын

Genesis 2 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a HELPER who is just right for him.” 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

@cryptonesto2095 Ай бұрын

God created women to be a helpmate to man. You need to put your reading glasses on and read again..

@ruthutin 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂 I love watching your videos. I appreciate the honesty and wisdom that you speaad to the community. Thanks for the laughs too.

@success1bae102 6 ай бұрын

DUH… Pay 50/50 so he can have enough money leftover to spend on his side chicks …

@manoniemoments 6 ай бұрын

Tony’s 50/50 isn’t the same as the culture’s definition of it. No one wants to be in a relationship with a leech. Marriage is about teamwork.

@manoniemoments 6 ай бұрын

Also, many American parents are not paying for weddings, and that’s okay. It would better serve a couple to opt for a cost friendly wedding.☺️ I like the idea of a small wedding honeymoon combo.💍🏝️ Inform family & friends about y’all’s decision and keep it moving.💓

@essancekingue5235 6 ай бұрын

i feel like in today’s culture, they automatically resort to the financial aspect regarding 50/50 when within a relationship, 50/50 is NOT just about finances. like you said, it’s the teamwork

@EsantyBeautyCo 6 ай бұрын

I really appreciate this honesty. This helps put things in perspective👏🏾

@nurseruth 6 ай бұрын

Decency! Yes and Amen!! Thank you Tony. God bless you for your boldness and willingness to share the truth with us.

@sharisss2608 6 ай бұрын

The reason that women are being more vocal about 50/50 is because women of certain cultures and those who were raised to be provided for saw so many women getting mistreated and having to pay so much just to get left and the man went to the next woman and provided for them. They saw this and felt bad because they never had to deal with that and they knew how much more valuable they felt and were treated and they spread the word to let them know they don’t have to deal with certain things. Now i don’t agree to bleed a man’s pockets dry and without savings either but the message was spread to get women who were being overly giving and overly sacrificing out of that space because women are not as strong as men and are more fragile when overworked.

@fascinatedbytruth4296 4 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing this perspective on marriage. I never knew this. I had an unrealistic expectation on what it takes to make a marriage works. I never knew I had to go 50/50. I totally get it. Your videos are needed. Thank you

@anethanealy7542 5 ай бұрын

Teach them Tony! Thanks for sharing some of your story for the people so they can understand real life!

@DrKrysRacquel 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for your perspective, Tony. I will say that the Bible doesn’t say the woman provides as we all know. There are single mothers working full time and being the primary caretaker for their kids. Those women are stressed and upset (many). In a fifty fifty relationship nothing changes for that lady really. Cause she’s still working full time and being the primary caretaker of the children. Let’s say most people have been in that situation of fifty-fifty.. Perhaps a man when he was young was fifty fifty with his wife or she paid most of the bills. Just because it might have happened for that man or woman, doesn’t mean they should encourage other people to do that. I found that men and woman when they have been in a certain situation they know it might not be that good but they would feel embarrassed to say it was wrong so instead they say it’s okay to do. Women are not designed to bear the stress of full time work to pay half the bills plus care for the children. Nothing wrong with a lady working but it should be an option. If it’s going to mean the kids get less care then she should be able to stay home. A good wife, if she sees the man is doing everything he has to - him working two jobs- and they still can’t make ends meet then she would of course look for work as a helpmate. Just my opinion. Thanks for everything. Life works different for everyone. Some men may say it’s fine to marry when they can’t fully support the family but some men will say they can’t marry until they can support the family. It just depends on what you want for your life.

@NourishedWomanHQ 6 ай бұрын

Scripture says a man should be providing for his family, I think it’s different a woman working having an incoming and supporting when needed but it is the man’s role to provide for his family, no woman can give 100% to her family AND BE working and paying bills speaking as a mother

@leslianncarney2650 6 ай бұрын

I love this man, its good to hear both side! this makes soo much sense. thank you!!

@joiagenae 6 ай бұрын

Facts! It just costs too much to live nowadays. I make 6 figs and I'm looking at getting a part time job now too lol. Inflation has affected us all and it's just not realistic to believe you won't have to contribute something to the bills. Focus on partnership and stop listening to what's on social media like TG said

@talkswithjas7959 6 ай бұрын

Same sis. I keep saying at this point every working person needs a minimum of 1.5 jobs.

@destinyschild5768 6 ай бұрын

I realized that too. Maybe if the man earn 500k or more and y’all live below your means it might be doable but how many people earn that much realistically 🤷🏾‍♀️

@MissHoustonSelassie 6 ай бұрын

“Marriage is Teamwork.” We Love You Coach 🙏🏾🤍✨

@texcoco41 6 ай бұрын

There are a lot of entitled women in the comments. I don't think they really want marriage to be honest.

@MissHoustonSelassie 6 ай бұрын

@@texcoco41Truthfully I haven’t looked at the comments 😅 but I’m thankful for your comment because you clarified what is being said and you are absolutely correct. Any woman or man who opposes what Coach says is someone who does not want marriage. 💯🤞🏾✨

@SylviaLoveJones 6 ай бұрын

So now you gonna block us cuz we disagree? 😂😂

@AfrahMusic 6 ай бұрын

😂😂😂 the only time I’ve ever disagreed with Tony. Seems no one in the comments agree as well. Rephrase and come back to us Tony cos how can you say u provide 100% and are asking us to go 50/50? Do you have a second family or are you abusive? No. But you are providing 100%. A woman will always do her part no matter how the world changes. A man should too. Bless you 🙏🏾

@J_Elle30 5 ай бұрын

Exactly, Tony just rambling at this point to post some videos to keep the bills paid

@mizzmee1976 5 ай бұрын

Honestly his last few videos have been on him leaning up on this headboard giving lazy & just talking to be talking just to stay in the atmosphere! He has been giving horrible advice lately. The smoke is settling.

@brttgldn 3 ай бұрын

I’m surprised I found THIS video! I had a heated argument with my guy & wanted to play TGs video about not dating a BB&D Man who wanna go 50/50. This is not the one I was expecting…I have to find the old videos dated at 5 years back. The message is dramatically different.

@Luandra3939 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing this brother 🙏🏽

@soniaunstoppable4862 5 ай бұрын

Amen! Preach brother Tony!

@brittneywilliams8851 6 ай бұрын

I totally agree with you, Tony.Your transparency is everything.Continue to speak the real because the world needs it.God bless you and your family.🙏🏾💯

@shannon08261 6 ай бұрын

I love the message. I totally agree with you. sidebar ripping the frame out the button is hilarious. 😂

@Prettywings777 6 ай бұрын

Yasss work together, love this entire message 🙏🏽

@elisawilliams9319 6 ай бұрын

You just went ahead and said that. Love it. This has been my stance all along and you just confirmed that for me. I love your in your face wisdom appreciate it very much. I was shouting at the end. Amen Sir Amen.

@Summerbaby247 6 ай бұрын

Partnership ends when it’s time for men who are not 100% providers to step up and manage the home and the children 🙄 I know Tony speaks to women, but it needs to be said that a lot of men who are not 100% providers are blind on what’s required from them in modern day marriages/family.

@nakooshaalbert8884 6 ай бұрын

He have videos on this already.. you may have to go further back!

@EastsideDee-mk6xk 6 ай бұрын

Men understand that tho . That’s why the marriage rate dropped and more men from 2023 on further aren’t having kids as much anymore either. More men are smartening up more than you might think. More men found out it’s better being a bachelor doing what you want and free and without kids

@Summerbaby247 6 ай бұрын

@@EastsideDee-mk6xk I think it’s a good idea for men who do not want to partner with women to create a successful family to step back.

@Summerbaby247 6 ай бұрын

@@nakooshaalbert8884 I think it’s important for a reasonable man, whose primary audience is men, to get men hip to what’s going on with modern relationships. I think this would help a lot since social media has such a huge impact on culture now.

@Twister_numba24 6 ай бұрын

Thank you!

@childofgodskingdom8403 6 ай бұрын

Thank you!! Tony for taking the air out of our heads and being transparent and bring realistic lifestyle and how we are suppose to build together to be somewhere in life. Wow I was believing a man was suppose to do it all. Now I understand I will help and take care of the house if I want it done correctly too.

@davisr9662 5 ай бұрын

Nahh baby…50/50 is a roommate

@kharyzma4u 6 ай бұрын

This was such a very real topic of discussion here! Great work!!! Many women dont realize that yes there are men that can pay 100% but they are not in abundance and/or they may be controlling or not generous. If they were in abundance, every woman would have one. I'm not advocating for 50/50, but what im saying is take each situation as it comes. Every relationship is unique. Make a choice that's going to work for you. Every woman is not going to have a man who can pay 100 or who will pay 100. That's just the truth.

@Amw410 6 ай бұрын

Tony broke everything down in a beautiful and meaningful way! Thank you

@Tahtiluv 6 ай бұрын

i listened to the whole video before commenting hoping that Tony would discuss what a productive family structure looks like. I remember the difference it made as a child when my mom worked vs. when she didn’t work. We all want to be there for our children the same way his wife is there for his. Where Tony hit the nail on the head was when he talked about lifestyle. We have to be comfortable living on our husband’s income and willing to make lifestyle changes that match it so we can still be a homemaker (and good homemakers can do this on a budget) The lady in that story was crazy and i believe she was an anomaly. Most women will help their man financially when necessary. I think the conversation is misunderstood by Tony because when women talk abt a man being 100% provider, it’s about him having the mindset to WANT to be; not necessarily that he is right now (even Tony said a half decent man will want to do this) but so many men say they don’t and that’s where women are upset, because some men don’t even have the mindset to ever want to provide

@iamcoachcourtney-letstalka4906 6 ай бұрын

Well said

@peaceful_and_blessed 6 ай бұрын

Ladies, unless we find another Tony Gaskins, I believe it not wise to put our financial fate in the hands of a MAN., or anyone for that matter. Find your gifts and talents, make money off of that, and enjoy your life as best as you can, because the man we desire may never show up. Keep pushing and praying ladies. I speak from a peaceful heart, therefore am not triggered by Tony’s message. I endorse it 100% 🙌🙏🏻

@rebeccabowers-my2xv 6 ай бұрын

I just love to hear you talk . 🗣️ and dropping those 💎

@yolandaferguson447 6 ай бұрын

Thanks, for always giving good advice. My ears are always open and ready to listening.

@Itskarush 6 ай бұрын

Thanks Tony. I needed to hear this message as a new fiancé🩵

@scc8728 6 ай бұрын

Thanks Tony I actually needed to hear that. I kept hearing woman on KZfaq saying the more a man spends the more invested he is. It could be true to a point but then I stopped the appreciation of the nice things my man did. I stopped listening to them but it left me feeling like I was less than but you spoke so well. I've always seen relationships as being a team

@TB-fk4qm 6 ай бұрын

Loved this video!! You kept it all the way 💯💯💯💯💯💯... You and your wife working together created an AMAZING future. Your wife need to school these entitled women.

@ceebee7192 6 ай бұрын

Like a good big brother talk. Humbled me for real, thank you.

@beautifulinterlude7044 6 ай бұрын

I needed to hear that. Thank You Tony.

@nakooshaalbert8884 6 ай бұрын

This message is packed with TRUTH🎯 NO Lies detected!!! 🙏🏾

@victoriouslee 6 ай бұрын

I pray my husband and I sit down, evaluate, and pray about how to approach our finances that will not bring stress, strain, or resentment to our foundation. Finances is a subject that is barely discussed beyond the surface, from realistic lens, or thoroughly navigated but sex, sexual positions, how many times a day is 🙄🤦🏾‍♀️ finances, expenses and all things money related must be discussed before marriage along with addressing and handling individual debts before coming together collectively.

@authorfrancesmarie8242 6 ай бұрын

God bless you and this message!

@millicentstollenwerck5239 6 ай бұрын

Tony this is a beautiful, real, and hard message. Most times we as women want a man to treat us better than we treat ourselves, and it rarely ever happens.

@sallyhamilton5928 6 ай бұрын

Amen Mr T G you are so right

@atomicgeisha 6 ай бұрын

Thanks so much for all you do to promote Christian family teachings.

@appliedknowledgeispower2024 6 ай бұрын

Tuning in from NYC ❤❤❤THANKS TONY for being real

@originalmix2546 6 ай бұрын

Is Mrs Gaskins really having that nice life ...I wonder or it's all a talk, big, fat talk of Mr Tony, while she does all the actual work while he is laying on his sofa, busy being an "influencer" and still wanting her to do full 50/50?

@NurseNotRatched 6 ай бұрын

Thank you for this Mr. Gaskins!!!

@Isa-Amor 6 ай бұрын

Um we still in the time but they not providing still being treated like property cheated on beat on and they have several family too. All that and they have the audacity to have their hand out. Its never 50/50 women have a heavy load. I see it worldwide. Get your money ladies. Leave these dusties

@1racethehumanrace946 6 ай бұрын

True facts 💯

@brookey_b875 6 ай бұрын

It’s always the BUHHHLOCKKKKKK for me 😂😅😭 appreciate your wisdom as always Tony !

@breannn 6 ай бұрын

I'm so glad that you spoke on this! These girls that are promoting this soft life/luxury life are dating rich men or have sugar daddies. The average everyday American can not afford “the luxury life.” People really need to be realistic.

@kejuanlynette8531 6 ай бұрын

Yes. I hate that "average" has become such a bad word. MOST people are AVERAGE hence the reason it's called average. Work together and build a life/lifestyle within your means with your husband/wife. If it leads to above average, great. If not, be content with the blessings you have.

@vinadouglas119 6 ай бұрын

Keep teaching TG ❤

@kayjeffs3741 6 ай бұрын

I think most women don't have a problem going 50/50 on bills...the issue is the husband still expecting her to do all the housework and child rearing. Then there's also the fear of building with a man, going 50/50 with him...all for him to leave you for someone else when he gets up then pays 100 for her...

@BlackBeauty-yl8uq 5 ай бұрын

Some****

@NoName-sp5dp 6 ай бұрын

Everyone doesn't need to be married. If you can't figure out how to be a sole provider you need to keep looking.

@taxcitybagtalk 6 ай бұрын

💯💯

@Key-Key444 6 ай бұрын

As a single mother of 2 I will Not be doing 50/50. Unless I “HAVE” to. Especially if he wants children. My child birth experiences were traumatic. My situation alone might disqualify me 😂😂😂😂😂 Maybe in another life. But I’m definitely going to enjoy my little ole single life. You only have one life to live 😊😌. Like these videos!

@avagreene797 6 ай бұрын

Sometimes it boils down to culture. I live in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood for over 20 years, with approx. 30 Jewish families on my street and none of the women work outside the home. The husbands are the sole providers. We're all in the same year, 2024.

@joyell821 6 ай бұрын

Can't relate. Tony lost me when he said earning over a mil a year, it still get tight.

@adarateranroldan 6 ай бұрын

Lifestyle creep is a thing. Especially if you didn’t inherit financial literacy from family.

@joyell821 6 ай бұрын

@@adarateranroldan it's called living above your means. Just don't do it. Simple.

@pandora9814 5 ай бұрын

Because he's horrible with his money. Why on earth does his wife have 3 cars and multiple designer bags when he claims it's "tight"? Plus who needs 3 cars for a single person? These people are idiots. I expect to be fully provided for but I learned at a very early age, about living within or even below your means. It was the best thing I ever learned.

@mizzmee1976 5 ай бұрын

He bragged about his wife cars, her handbags, the fact that she don’t have to work, he pays all the bills & funds her lifestyle but he makes 1 million dollars a year but its tight. Make it make sense. Please.