Let's be real, the only reason the left guy was so adamant about using the computer was simply because he also didn't want his friend to see what he has on his phone 😏

Zach's method of securing his search history seems super easy, barely an inconvenience.

This video had so many oppurtunities for sponsors like Coinbase or VPNs, but Zach didn't include them. He did that for us.

The letter P is extremely sus

The constant baiting of sponsorships was done amazingly, well done Zach!

“Your homepage is Pornhub” “Oh shit I’ve been meaning to change that” Lmao, but I thought he took great care in cleaning up his tracks.

I expected him to press one key and hear hardcore porn sounds.

the last parts of the process reminded me of that one scene in family guy where peter is just deleting like 50 tabs and joe goes "how old is that girl?" And peter just takes it, sails out to sea and drops the laptop in there

I feel like having someone use my pc is like having them use my toothbrush. Even if there's nothing to hide, I just hate the fact that they control my stuff.

"I'll just put my face really close" - Zach star

I don't know....a prostate exam from E.T. may not be the worst thing in the world,what with that healing touch and all. He may even be able to reverse a fair amount of that terrible rectal trauma that I totally don't have.

I kept waiting for the VPN sponsorship lol

"Wait, why don't you just screencast from your phone, that way you can show me the video and we can sidestep this whole thing?" "And risk showing you MY youtube history? Out of the question."

Gotta let them use the guest computer

He forgot about the fact that the internet service provider also has records of the websites he visits.

when he said coinbase, I got scared but when he mentioned "c is next to x" I felt relieved

Its time we start asking the real questions. In fantasy stories, why is the evil guy always after "immortality and ultimate power"? How the hell does he know that what he is doing will even lead to that one specific outcome? Has the scientific method been applied yet? And if it works because someone else did it, where the hell is that guy that did it? Shouldnt he be immortal and all powerful, and thus still in charge? And if someone beat him, is his power really "ultimate"? I mean, for all you know, the bad guy has just as much evidence for his ritual ending in ultimate power and immortality as he has for it ending in the mother of all farts. I would love to see a skit where the "hero" is just trying his best to convince the villain that what he made is actually a diarreah potion and is trying to save him from embarassment after the evil villain, who ruined his own life when he found a tome that said "guide to ultimate power of the dark arts" and didnt notice the f had been rubbed off, mistakenly believes it will lead to ultimate power.

I can end this super quickly.. “Can I use your computer?” “No”

The absolute mater-of-fact monotone that he used when saying “your homepage is pornhub” had me dying 😂

Missing the step where while at the junkyard, use the magnet strong enough lift a car to wipe the hard drive.

My solution to this dilemma is to simply point to my bookmark bar entry that's clearly labelled "porn" and say, "that's not a joke; if you don't want to see porn right now, don't click that." The real trick though is that nobody I don't already trust ever gets close to my computer in the first place.

At first I was intrigued with his search history but after he said that he destroys his computer, I think I’m better off not knowing…

This video gets real dark when you realize he doesn't want him to type "c" or "p".

So disregarding the whole homepage thing, if you use someone elses computer you just open incognito yourself. OR, have firefox as the guest browser :)

He's singlehandedly responsible for the chip shortage.

It always scares the shit out of me

And that's why you share your kinks with your friends. No surprises, and you can make fun of each other mutually

Just found your channel and have been binge watching them all day, tell me, why in the hell are you so funny and how havent I heard of you

“What kind of porn are you watching?” 🤣🤣🤣

"On MY youtube account? Absolutely not." Me every time a coworker wants to search for a song on my phone.

umm just open it in an incognito window and then give him the computer. ohhh. ok he brings it up lol. Edit, use screen cast to cast your phone onto the monitor, so only the monitor is used.

This why I hide my google chrome browser and let people use internet explorer or firefox

This is far too relatable.

"How dare you assume I know what I am doing" - I am suing you for identity theft, bc this is me right here

Friend: "Hey can I show you this p**n on your computer?" Me: "Specifically what will you be searching for? The first and last letter?" Friend: "C and G" Me: "Absolutely forbidden, can't let nobody access my chegg account"

I shouldn't have to use incognito mode. It's my own computer.

„Oh shit I’ve been meaning to change that“ 3 minutes and 10 seconds all for nothing. Lmao

I was wondering what the final twist would be when he gets up but did not expect that.

This is accurate as hell for the first half 🤣

I handed MY BOSS my phone to Google something, he saw phub in my “recently viewed”, looked at me and I was already staring back at him. We have never spoken of this. I see him every day. If you’re embarrassed of watching porn, as a man at least 10 years my senior, somethings wrong with you

Bruh love you content , keep growing and keep shining One of your OGs

The first letter is very important factor. But even that, google just shows what I specifically didn't want to be shown on suggestions.

I‘m dying! You‘re a legend Zach

One of my professors (weeks from his retirement at this point) put P in the search bar during class once. That was interesting.

How can something be so wrong, yet so true.

Just keep two computers.. one for yourself and one for everyone else!!! 😎

Imma be real my search history will probably put me on a list

Everyone knows you must have a clean guest account available on your computer at any time.

You know I like to think that you just have a shit ton of twins to help you make these video’s and this was a real conversation you had.

Friend: "I need to look up Everlong by Foo Fighters lyrics, can I borrow your comp-" Me: **Toss my computer out the window** Friend: "D-did you toss your computer out the window?" Me: Computer? Never had a computer.

No worries at least you remembered to change your background

"what kind of porn you watching?" XD

I love your channel keep up the great stuff!

lolol I typed P into my search bar and fruit trees and plants all popped up... Persimmon was #1 I'm clean xD

That's why you have at least two browsers installed and have the main one locked

As a tiling wm Linux user, I don't think most of the people could use my pc even if i let them to

As long as you’re worried about P and X, instead of E, you’re still pure.

I also delete cookies and cakes from my fridge all the time 😂

so true had a friend who always panicked when I ask for his laptop or phone to look up something on the internet

When my phone's keyboard comes up on a URL, the three recommendations from my keyboard are the P website, the X website, and the other X website with a hamster. My keyboard truly knows the kind of person I am.

The laughter never ends😂😂

Every computer should have a guest mode that defaults to the default install and resets every time it is booted up.

"2 hours? 😟" I'm dead

I literally cannot with you Zach 😂

That's why you enable a password less guest account

You can always put him in guest user mode.

This gives me Sheldon vibes

Wow I just clicked on this video 8 min after he posted. Does that mean he got his new computer, and then exactly uploaded this video?

When he said c I was like oh ye "chaturbate" but no he meant the X next to it , ooos

After this story I would not have touched that mouse.

Okay, that last line got me. lol

Love you Zach 🛐

I felt this

I always give them access to a guest account. Nothing much to worry then.

Browsing history, cookies and cake lmao

“Cake” “That’s cache”😂

Understandable, relatable even…

"What kind of porn do you watch?" Brother you do not want to ask that question

I see the Patreon seems to be going okay so far.

The ultimate solutions to solve all these problems and more is to use a stealth browser that doesn't have a widget ok the screen saver or in the hot bar

Incognito mode!

Don't be surprised if he probably bookmarked some

Have your guest use incognito mode!

"Mission Failed. We'll get'em next time."

So thats why I've got several browser with clean history and also a guest account where they can log into...

That's why you set you browser to purge everything on exit.

Yep. I can see that.

I use microsoft edge for explicit activities on my computer because no one with any level of self respect would ever use microsoft edge when using the internet at a friends house not with that tantilizing chrome and firefox icon right there. Best part about using edge for this is you can go back to a video you watched earlier and pick up from where you left off if you needed to channel that pre nut energy for something taxing like talking to a woman that bores the fuck out of you or doing a kamehameha. In short they should rebrand and i have the slogan "edge, with edge"

That ending is top tier

This is actually a little bit to relatable

X-rays near me. X? Not a chance

Actually i always let my friends just use incognito mode when they do anything. Funny that he mentioned it.

“Cookies and cake was my compter hungry?” 💀💀💀

3:07 So, we know it's a brand new computer. And He hasn't used it yet. But his browser homepage is already set to the Hub. Theory time: Homie goes through computers a day, on the assumption of at least 2 enthusiastic "distributions of free literature" avg daily, likely pre-built, and his pre-built source is so G certified at this point they setting him up w/ proper service up to and including personalization settings... and set his homepage to Phub for 'im. Fucking love this channel lol

A wise man once said in empty search history will always say more than a full one

Good luck trying to do anything on my computer. Even I can't get it to do what I want! 🤣

Some guy at your ISP prepares popcorn every time your computer pings them. He knows you better than your wife knows you

this is why u setup a guest account.

Oh i already know what this video is gonna be about

This is why the Guest profile exists in chrome.