Thank you everyone for your immense kindness and open hearts with this video. I want to give a huge shout out to Nyane (instagram.com/nyane/) as my inspiration for much of the content I've been creating, and I'm both nervous and excited to start sharing what I've been creating for you all!

That sounds so tough. Working with agencies is usually so predatory, I really feel you there. But really trying to take the time do what you love just for you, it's easy to forget how to do that when you're online and at the mercy of the opinions of the internet. I hope you manage to keep doing what you love and you can keep making what you love.

Thank u for being vulnerable with us and I’m so glad ur back! 🥰 Whatever u do next I’m with you! 💖

I'm so happy that you are on your road to rediscovering who you are as an individual. I'm proud of you. It's very hard to stay true to your authenticity sometimes and especially moreso in the public eye. I'm very happy to have you as a friend and I'm always here for a listen and air hug if you need it. Until July my love ❤ sending you the biggest airhugs I hope you feel them. And remember. I love you with all of my butt. Because it's bigger than my heart. Xo

It felt like gut punch when you talked about losing your art. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I've been there; I lost my art after a big trauma and it was so painful.

I am totally feeling your situtation Clawdeena... I´ve been through one bad releation ship with a guy who was also jsut using me and trying to manipulate me. When we had been dating for a while i wanted to tell him about my doll collection, but something was always holding me back, and I just could not! I think it was just bad premonition, because this guy broke up with me after 8 months and if I told him I that I have been collecting dolls, the whole school would laugh at me today... And don´t get me wrong - I'm not ashamed of collecting them, it's just that sometimes people perceive it quite negatively and they can even bully you for this... C´mon guys! It is jsut a harmless hobby!

Thank you a million times for making this video. I went through something similar, specifically with ex relationships, anxiety, etc. It was very validating to hear that I wasn't alone, and finally know the word limerence and how it perfectly describes how I was in those relationships as well. Big hugs and love from the bottom of my heart

Fuck yeah dedragging while being vulnerable, cinematography majors could never. Generally I want you to know that I admire your style of content because (it seems to me like) you are very instinctually in touch with what grabs attention and carries your message - I'm sure there's hard work behind that, but some people can try but never do it. I hope you continue to do stuff you like and continue evolving. Human to human, I don't know who you are but iiiii I'm with yououou

I usually don’t comment anymore, but this video somehow made me want to start doing so again. Whoever is reading this: you are completely valid the way you are and let no one tell you otherwise! I somehow feel, with you, Clawdeena, sharing your vulnerabilities and feelings that I can do the same. I’ve been collecting dolls since 3rd grade and I remember how thrilled I was to learn I was not the only one who “never stopped”. I grew up watching unboxings and stop-motion videos and spent all my allowance on dolls; they were the only thing I ever wished for for my birthday, etc. I just loved the doll community overall! Not being a native English speaker myself, this was one of the reasons for me to start practicing / learning English. But anyway. I always kept my dolls in their boxes, so naturally, some day I ran out of space and sold almost all of them (which I still regret for most of them to this day). I especially remember one moment when I was in 8th grade and already being mobbed by my “friends” when we went shopping together and I went to the toy section to look at the dolls. You probably know how it goes… However, I always kept a few of my dolls, the ones I liked most basically. Now onto the part where I’m an adult and finally found real friends who aren’t taking every single thing out of my life to mob me for. They even think it’s cool that I collect dolls! But here’s the part that made me want to write this comment in the first place: Limerence… That hit way too close to home. I just recently had my very first boyfriend and… The whole comparison to the Why Do Ghouls Fall In Love movie you made made me both realize even more what kind of toxic relationship this was (at least I believe I can call it that), but it somehow gave me comfort that I’m not the only one out there. My (thankfully now) Ex wanted me to “throw out” every single of my dolls that was left and was mocking me for saying I didn’t want to. The breakup, heck, the “relationship” was absolutely terrible and I’m still recovering (I just recently realized that he was a narcissist), but it showed me one thing that I should have known from the very beginning… That you should always be yourself. That you shouldn’t have to hide who you are. Being a doll collector just gives me so much joy, even if it may seem weird to others. But even if that is the case - so what! Who are they to judge you for it? When something makes you happy, you shouldn’t be afraid to do it. Just a few days ago, I finally found the strength to buy a doll again - space is still a problem, but I will try not to ever hide what makes me happy again. Anyway, this comment is all over the place, but I just want to say… Thank you, for making this video. For being a part of the doll community and for being such a great example to all of us.

Ok, unrelated to the video, but your real hair with the cleo makeup looks really cute.❤ it makes me want to start doing makeup again. Its been a couple years since I did anything other than a lipgloss due to chronic pain and tiredness, as well as having to wake up really early and go to a job i really hated and didn’t try to look nice for. I miss doing makeup but ive been so tired, taking too many naps and sleeping through the day. You’ve inspired me to get “glammed up” again ❤

no one can take away your talent or creativity. If anything, taking a step back to self reflect is healthy and needed in order grow. So happy to see you again and looking forward to whatever you are going to share with the doll community.

the way i had just found her through shorts not that long ago and was also amazed im so glad she inspired you i really hope things only get better and whatever comes next you feel amazing!!!

i’ve been following since the og monster high doll review days, when we were both kids on the internet. you were one of the youtubers that inspired me to make doll videos myself (long since deleted- but that’s where my 300 subs came from 🥹) i look forward to seeing what comes next, even if it’s another long hiatus. do what you need too! i sincerely hope things keep looking up for you.

I went through that empty, purposeless feeling all throughout my 20s. I had a natural ability for art and learned this at a very young age. It was discouraged in my home, though my parents let me keep it as a hobby. But I loved it more than that. They thought it would prevent my academics from improving because I was diagnosed with dyslexia, dyscalculia and ADD, and I guess even even in 2002, the general knowledge of what helped "disabled" children was pretty limited. All of the adults in my life stopped me from doing the one thing I did naturally and well, and had they let me, I would've known success more often. I even entered something I did into an art contest in our school library and won 2nd place. Then, I entered a piece to be the cover for the yearbook, and won that too. And I was pulled out of class to make the school banner for our state's annivery day. They picked me out if a thousand kids. My parents thought it was all pretty cool, but they didn't care much. My grades suffered, and I was 18 in the 9th grade and dropped out. I started my first job and, while I had many jobs in my 20s, they all sucked the little bit of joy for life I had left. I mean it. I was beyond depressed, had a strange headache every day, and it felt like a halo was sqeezing my forehead. Had anxiety and depression so badly, it didnt matter if I was asleep or awake. My BPM was 150 or higher. Between the ages of 18 to 26, I was on 10 different medications to even out my moods and harmful thoughts, blood pressure, and so on. And I was only 130 lbs, too. My parents, everyday for years into my young adult life told me to "cheer the hell up." While I had no education, tried 6 separate times to get my GED and received no help, can't get a full time job, or pay more than $10. I couldn't take care of myself, I had no future and when I left school, I had a 4th grade reading level ane virtually no math skills. The school system failed me at every turn. I had to teach myself while learning to be an adult. And while all of this was happening, I couldn't draw worth a damn. The only thing in my life that is a constant need as much as food and sleep. It wasn't until i turned 30 last year that I began to evolve into something better. It took about 3 years to get there. Constant work, no one to help me, no one to direct me. One day, days before I realized what I want to do with myself, I looked up at the ceiling and screamed at literally cursed at the fates. I told them to shove the fuck off, get a fucking life, stop fucking with me and its my time to do what I want. Everyone tells me what to do at every turn, directing me like they have the authority, power of position to tell a grown woman what to do, think, feel. And I told my parents the same. They deserved to hear it. I don’t care if they care. They know now they were inadequate parents that couldn't accept their child. Then, last August, I woke up in a sweat and got onto my PC and, on complete instict, wrote a dummy script for a comic book. Not original, I wrote a pilot for a version of TMNT and didn't eat, sleep or drink anything for 2 days. It was the most incredible and longest rush I've ever felt in my life. I carried on from there, in less than a month, while working as a comic book artist, got a offer from an indie comic book company that makes their own books, got to meet the likes of Rob Paulsen, John Rhys Davies, Cam Clark, and so on, and its only been 8 months. It was like the universe said, "You finally got the balls to flip me off." I know what it feels like to ge void of life because you can't create. I never want to feel that way again.

I know that its hard.. I know u can get through the struggles! stay strong clawdeena😊 sending love and hugs💓🤗

I'm not a huge social media person, but the algorithm just showed me this now. Thank you once again for being so open with the clawmunity, I can definitely relate to some of what you said all too well. You're young, but you're very wise. Whatever you make, there will always be people who will embrace you. (I do love those Whatnot streams when I'm able to make them.)

Girl. You MADE this community! Sending so much love 🫶🏻🫶🏻

You are so incredibly funny. Genuinely. It shows how much processing you've done, and shows a comfort of vulnerability. That's the key to deep growth and attachment to the self. You are speaking so strongly to the next few years of growth for me.

Thank you so much for your content. I am an old doll collector and it gives me such joy to watch a real creative person present such intelligent content with such sensitive transparency. I am so sorry for the pain your sensitivity and relationships have brought you but you are ABSOLUTELY not alone there. Your generous and genuine reaching out have earned you the celebrity you have and the heartfelt gratitude of so many. It is a wonderful thing to experience a mysterious connection to another human person living their life in the always complex world. Thank you so much for all you add to that world. Your little light DOES SHINE!

you are my fav doll content Kreator, i got badly bullyid and had a hard time in School and wen i had These dark Times i just came on ur Chanel and watched ur Videos felling like ther are ppl who have the same interests like me and it made me feel included. and seeing ur Chanel and just being you made me feel like i can be more myselfe. keep going and remember ther are allways ppl who support and love you.

I just want to say that during the pandemic I was going through hell. Like some of my lowest points. But your videos helped me stay afloat, I love what you do and we all care about you so much. Take care of yourself Clawdeena!

Glad to see you're back ! I've missed your opinions & chats about what's going on in the doll world. You can find your way back to what you love. 1st steps are recognizing the problems, then you can move forward. And you're young. I'm older & say we all are more sensitive & obsessive over relationships the younger we are. That's normal to an extent. As we age, we figure ourselves out more, so things aren't as ---- I don't know what the word is, but hope it helps 🙏🤗 Look forward to seeing your face more, no matter what face you have that day !

Love seeing you back! You are such an inspiration! 💕💕💕

Glad youre back, be sure to take your time during this process you matter more than social media! I love your videos and how interactive you are on sc, you have such a fun and charming personality best wishes 🫶

I have always enjoyed your videos and will continue to watch. Thank you for being vulnerable with us. You are very well articulated when discussing your mental health struggles. ❤️

Thank u sm for sharing that! I’m sure a lot of ppl can relate ❤ one of my comfort KZfaqrs fr

So sorry you've been going through it....I really respect your talent and it makes my week when you post KZfaq. I'm sure everyone would agree we would never forget you. 💜

I relate so hard to the sadness of losing your favorite hobby and dissisociating. Thank you for being so open with us. We are here for you and im happy that your true to yourself❤

Thank you for staying strong and pushing through all of this. I couldn't imagine. Im so glad you're back and can't wait to see your new content!! 🫶🩷

this is a lovely side of you and you know I fully support the fact that you didn't stick with that company. tbh I originally found your channel cause of monster high stop motion stuff and I love the energy and over all realness you bring even now to your current videos. Also love your looks ^^

I'm so glad your back i always used to be so amazed with your videos, you're probably my favorite youtuber. keep doing what you love and what makes you happy, dont let people knock you down. you got this!💞

Happy to see you back and always love that you keep it real. I just started watching you not that long ago because I love your makeup and doll outfit looks always so well done. I am just getting into collecting some of the monster high dolls and seeing your collection on videos is like wow there are so many beautiful dolls. I also been going through anxiety and physical symptoms heart palps, racing heart, panic for few years now. It got worse during covid. I been trying different ways to manage it. Hope your anxiety gets better.

Longtime fan, first time commentor. So grateful that you uploaded this video video, I have so much respect for you that I didn’t know I was going to have before.. Please keep making content like this and I will definitely listen to your podcast

This video touched my heart so much that it made me cry since the things you said about depression ,remind me about what I do when I'm depressed it almost felt like you were reading my mind. I'm so glad to know that even my comfort KZfaqr has problems I can relate to and I will definitely continue watching you because your video help me lift my spirits.

we love u!! ❤ whatever u decide to do we’ll be here, even if you decide to stop making videos or take breaks we’ll still support u :)

I love ur content and amazing fashion sense! I too slid in a deep depression with getting shadow banned from instagram..tik tok is very hard for me to watch as well. Thank you for sharing and I’m giving you warm tight hugs from a fellow doll collector and fashionista!

You are amazing and thank u so much for being so vulnerable 💕💕💕💕💕💕🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂

This is your work. This is your work. It’s not lightning. You own it, you earned it. Every artist is inspired by other artists. I hope you continue to feel empowered and inspired by your work and artistic expression.

This video helped me out a lot, as someone who has struggled with doll photos. My Instagram has basically died as of this point. It has really showed me there is hope of that love coming back.

I am so sorry you've had such a rough time over the past couple years with management and mental health wise. Do what ever you need to do to heal we all have different ways of coping even if they change over time. I am so glad you have found what makes you happy and you are not going to take other peoples opinions to heart you are amazing and sweet and my comfort KZfaqr/Instragram Live/ WhatNot content creator. You're so real and speak your mind which I love. If you ever need another break just know I'll be waiting for when you're ready to come back. Love you hun!

Welcome back! We're all happy to see you post again

Hmmm, I think you are a sweet, creative person! I enjoy your creative transformations and doll reviews, I hope life takes you to better places! I have a son who had his heart crushed, it has taken him several years to recover. Hang in there, you are one of my favorite KZfaqr.

You're my comfort you tuber your my inspiration I came out in 2018 thanks to your you tube videos u gave me the courage and confidence to do what I love

I'm Glad Your Okay! And Nothing Bad Happened To You I Missed Your Videos Your My Favorite Doll KZfaqr And Coming From Someone That Has Anxiety And Social Anxiety I Feel You Ghoul! And Your Not Alone

I originally came for the doll content - but I stayed because of you being you, I guess. 😊 I can't remember which video that was but once you shared your thoughts about finding the first doll with asian features when you were a kid and that one really made me *think*. Not just an entertaining video - which is super great in itself - but something you said that lingers on and inspires. One never fully knows about the impact one has on other people. 💖

Wow. Always impressed, but never surprised by your beauty and authenticity my dear. Thank you for sharing your heart with us.

When I was younger I also got bullied for collecting dolls and because I can’t pronounce some things correctly and what I wore people are mean in school so glad I don’t have to deal with school anymore, I find dolls have always brought me joy when I’m down Ty for sharing your experience with us were here for you ❤

Omggg a potcast would be so cute !! Whatever u decide I’ll be here ❤ !

Hello Clawdeena. I do understand regarding your sensitivity. I am 60 years old and have been sensitive as a child, a teenager and am still sensitive to this day. What upsets me is when the person being very insensitive says it's my fault for feeling the hurt they have put on me. Insensitive people will never see the hurt they put on people. You are a kind, clever & sensitive soul & I see you. Thank you for being you. Jane in New Zealand 🇬🇧🇳🇿

I love you so much and I'm so glad you're back. Just be yourself. We love you for that!

im not a very frequent watcher, but your cosplays are always amazing, and im happy you were able to find a new way to express yourself through the use of your fav doll characters and your artistic skills. its so important being able to channel your thoughts and feelings into something healthy. also respect for standing up against the whole, using queerness and whatever as marketing tactics. and about being open about who inspired you and giving credit. i will check out her vids and keep an eye out for what you're doing next ✨

im hexcited for what u have in store for us! love you always❤

Thank you for being open and sharing. But then I always listen closely. You are what "made" me watch and listen. I am very sorry about how some relationships have treated you. And I am happy you are finding your way back to your core happiness. Looking very much forward to whatever you plan to bring and create. Hugs.

God, i never heard of this term limerance before. i just feel so not alone anymore. Im sorry you had to go through all that though, but im also glad you pulled through and came back to us, keep doing you! ❤

I’m so sorry this happened to you clawdeena. I hope things get better soon❤❤

Thank you for your back)) we were waiting for you😊

The icon has posted again 💖

Glad you’re back! ❤

You are an amazing person. You are absolutely fabulous and so professional in your outward persona. You have a maturity beyond your years and you have a great career ahead of you. But it shouldn't hurt you, you should only do things that make you happy and never feel owned by us. Take care my friend.

❤ glad to have you back!

Love it when you tubers talk about their problems in a way that’s helpful and healthy for them😭

❤❤❤ I felt this. 👌🏾😘 Still rocking with ya... Xoxo keep your head up Queen. Thanks for defining that "Behavior" to now I've only known it as over romanticizing. Been there done that... Been missing myself. But consistently in the background still supporting you. Love your plan and directions. Let's go! Beautiful Cleo Cosplay btw... Fantastic.

Everything about your dolls contest is wonderful job keep on doing what you like two do in life and your relationship with the dolls community and your relationship so head

Listen, everyone goes through different things. Nobody should ever give you the kind of feeling of being unwanted or pressured. You go at your own pace. And taking yourself out and treating yourself every once in a while don't hurt. Everyone is different and unique. Do what you want to do with your life and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Just know you were missed but taking time for you is important. I'm glad you feel like you can create again. Do what you love and the rest will fall into place. I'm looking forward to taking the next journey with you through your videos

I definitely understand where you're coming from! I'm an aspiring author, but I also tend to experience burnout a lot and just dissociate constantly. Working a full-time job and trying to stay on top of daily chores at home hardly leaves me free time to even read, let alone write! I also live alone, and don't really talk to anyone. I tend to pull a Danny Phantom and "go ghost" a lot. Some of my friends expect this, and don't even bother to check in with me to see if I'm okay. But I do have one friend (literally just the one) that messages me daily to make sure I'm fine. And I make sure she's fine. And sometimes we end up talking for hours, and sometimes we leave it at those reassurances. I feel like no one would read the stories I want to tell. But I'm so passionate about writing. I have great ideas - I know I do! - but then I doubt myself and just... don't even bother, because why would I? Why should I? I'm grateful to KZfaqrs like you who keep it real with us. And I'm also glad that you took this break and the time you needed to sit back and reflect. It sounds like it did you a world of good, my dear!

👏👏👏👏 YOU DO YOU!! Clearly, it works, 1.1M🔥🔥🌟🌟 Now we gotta work on that relationship mindset and how to LET GO more easily. Dont get too attached 😂😂😂 no relationship is worth mental health 🤮

I'm so glad your back ❤I'm going through the same and different thing I was bullied because I'm non binary and lesbian i cry so much wishing people just like me for who I am and you're my comfort KZfaqr thank you for being you ❤

I am sorry you have been so unhappy 😞People can really mess us up but i hope you find true happiness and thank you so much for being true and your Great videos 🤗🤗🙏🙏❤❤

You’re like THE KZfaqr in the current doll times, and you’re incredibly authentic and unique, this video including is exactly what we want to see on here!

Mama, kudos for saying that. For spilling!

Hey ghoul! I know times are tough, but me and harry send lots of love and we really hope you feel better!

You’re beautiful on the inside and on the outside. Always remember that! ❤❤❤ hugs from 🇵🇷

Lol the whatnot jumpscare 😂 keep slaying gurl❤

I’m happy your back ❤

I wanted to write a long meaningful comment but am not really sure of the words for it. Well, what’s most important is we missed you and hope things will get better soon. ❤❤❤

Big fan of your work and I love making things that I like

Nice to see you back on YT ❤

Long live art for art's sake 🥰 I never stop being surprised, blown away, reborn.....🌹

Buddy, there’s a better way to get your contacts out than pinching. I’m so sorry they gaslighted you and used your insecurities against you. I’ve always thought you are incredibly talented and well written at such a young age. I appreciate the impact you’ve made in your community and the transparency of your struggles. Never undersell yourself. You are truly amazing. You are one of my comfort KZfaqrs. I love your historical content and the fearless way you present differing opinions. I never thought that I might have DID, but the more I learn about it, the more I’m identifying the markers within myself. As you get older, you find power you never knew you had. It’s less about the “comfort” and accommodation of others and more about what you need to be happy. It’s a freeing feeling to tell the toxic irritation that you quit with their nonsense. Know you are supported

Thank you for being vulnerable with us, Ik it’s so hard! Hearing your experience made me realize that maybe I’ve been dissociating more than I realized… In 2021 my ex broke up w me outta the blue (the man I thought I was gonna marry!), my friends turned on me, then I lost my job, my car broke down, found out my ex was cheating on me, got used by “friends”, car got repossessed, then car needed more work, got a hernia & needed surgery so I was outta work again, got to go to a festival in another state just for the their thing to be canceled & there was a horrid storm we were stuck outdoors in so I paid to be traumatized, totaled my car, got into a fight w a coworker, then just sprained my foot & ankle at work & have been out for 1.5 months w workers comp avoiding my calls 😅 it’s been a long ride to say the least. I lost 120 lbs bc of the stress and anxiety. I had stress hives. Passed out from anxiety for the first time and people still tell me it’s not that bad/others have it worse like that’s one of the causes of my anxiety! 😂 I haven’t been able to enjoy my love for dolls either & this vid just refueled my love for them & your vids. For me, crochet has been my fuel to feel alive & now I want to make a clawdeena9 inspired project 🧐 I say that all to say, it’s not the same situation but I can understand how you have been feeling. I’m sorry you had to deal with all of that, but I am so so happy and proud that you’ve come this far! Wishing you years of health & prosperity 💖 Ps: you’re a comfort KZfaqr for me bc your voice is very soothing & I love hearing it! ❤

As long as it’s about you and your love for dolls I understand you were going through a rough time hopefully dolls can be partners with you as well I understand what it’s like though when you are not inspired in your doll art

Love the idea of the Dollitics podcast!!!

Ur my comfort youtuber because ur raw and real Ur younger than me but I think ur style, creativity and yes doll collections r amazing From what I’ve seen ur not as fake as everyone else is If u don’t like a bitch ur blunt as fuck about it and don’t pretend to be someone ur not U act and talk like a human not some walking ad or phoney Being genuine in who u r is the most attractive and amazing trait u have As for relationships it’s rare to find true love or ppl that aren’t going to use u or abuse u I personally stopped dating in 2010 at the age of 21 Haven’t been on one since and I’m happy (but it was a mix of severe childhood trauma and the fact that numerous guys told me I’m the girl u date while u wait for something better) I’ve got mental illness and I’ve learned over time to be myself and fuck what ppl think (tho I still have pretty low self esteem and self worth) but I’ve grown a lot over the years It takes time to figure things out and ur doing it a heck of a lot faster than most ppl so be proud of ur accomplishments and hard work

I LOVE stop motion animation! 🥰 I'm going back to the Gumby and Pokey days, (ancient trail blazers for Wallace & Grommet 😆) Do what you love and you can move mountains. 🙂✌️❤️

Ik it's a small part of the video but hearing someone else know and mention limerence really validatesqhat I've been going through with it ❤

Welcome back, queen.

bad experiences just make you a stronger person and we all love and believe you🧡 your videos have always entertained me even though i'm not super into dolls and that stuff, but your way of explaining and video style were always just so fun

Hugs Clawdeena 😢☹️🤗❤

Thank you for sharing. It's nice to have honest and vulnerable KZfaqrs that you can connect with. Not only are you my comfort KZfaqr, but you're so many others as well. People like you and Markiplier are what keep me going. ❤️

Nyane is gorgeous. I've been following her for so long!

I kinda feel them on the dating thing because all of my relationships have been terrible as someone who also has dolls also I love your art anyways Clawdeena. 💗💜💙❤️

I turn 30 in feb of this year i feel the same at the moment i can tell i sell a lot of dolls that i buy to fit in a group o narcisist and my abusive relathionships you will be ok just let the things go and enjoy your life little one

so real. love you.

WE LOVE YOU!!

I’m so happy to see your face! Whatever content you decide to make I’m here for it. As someone with lots of mental health struggles I really appreciate your vulnerability. I’ve experienced a lot of the same struggles you have and it’s so so hard. It helps me to know I’m not the only one spiraling out of control app hopping and feeling totally overwhelmed by everything. I’m glad Nyane helped you find some joy and motivation (I love her). It’s amazing how sometimes it can be the most random stuff that changes our lives and fills us full of light and inspiration! I hope you know that we love you ❤️

You are just as pretty without your make up xxxx

I am super proud of you!!!!!!!😊 ur amazing and cool! Ur a very good makeup artist😊 I have some low self esteem but I'm still working on my self esteem and I'm more happy😊 I'm sorry u went through that during covid... I hope ur ok now.. Do you need a virtual hug?

💜 I feel this

“Am I ever going to laugh again” been there done that, -11/10 would not enter that mental state again I did learn to laugh again like I used to so there’s that.