Every journey starts with the first step. This is my first time making a video so I was a little nervous but far as I know nobody is watching.
I wanted to share with you the reason why I'm doing this whole channel or recording myself.
Basically I quit my job because I wasn't doing something that resonated with me.
I'm not sure if I started the job being depressed, or maybe I was already and became more depressed as time went on. I basically hit rock-bottom. I felt so depressed going into work every day and trying to socialize with other coworkers was very tiresome. I would avoid social interactions as much as I could and if I got stuck in them I would look for any opportunity to leave.
So in short I guess you can say I am on a journey, a spiritual journey, trying to become happy and get rid of all the fear and anxiety that have been with me most of my life.
For months I stayed with my job and kinda hung in there
just making a paycheck. This job was actually the most
money I had ever made. It all didn't matter. Everything inside me was telling me to leave. So I did.
People ask me what kind of job I am looking for now. I tell them I am not and that I am on a quest right now for happiness and inner happiness. For me there is no point in starting another job if I am not happy on the inside. I will only follow the same patterns and be miserable again.
I really think in doing this video channel I am stumbling onto something amazing and healing.
In the past I've tried numerous pharmaceutical drugs to try
to feel better. But my belief now at this point
is that you don't need drugs to cure depression. In fact I think they
do more harm than good (in most cases). I think its more about mastering your mind and your subconscious mind and re-wiring your brain for happiness.
I'm feeling pretty good right now and I almost wish I would have started making these videos
two months ago when I was at my job and at the height of my anxiety, depression and despair just to show you how I felt.
But in making these videos I get to see my mental state a year, or years down the road and how it has changed. I can also use these videos to remember what methods and techniques I used to help myself to get to feeling happy. But the main point of all
of this is to try and inspire people to take control of their own feelings and emotions. To help people who need the help so they can start taking their life back and feeling better.
I am just a regular guy and I truly believe that there are ways to control your emotions, feelings etc.
You can change your thoughts to be more prone to positive thoughts instead of negative ones. Society and the media doesn't make it easy for us to feel happy about ourselves , but our minds in its natural state is love and happiness and that's what it wants. We just have to shift our perception back to love and happiness.
I was depressed off an on for decades. I have finally had enough and I am ready to do what it takes to make myself happy on a consistent basis.
Hope you enjoy and would love you to join me on this journey.