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Why Therapy Can Make Us Feel Worse...

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Kati Morton

Kati Morton

3 жыл бұрын

Why does therapy make us feel worse at first? If we have been stuffing things down for years and years, and finally decide to start talking about it, there can be a lot to go through, a lot to feel, and a lot to make sense of. I like to think of this process as me sorting through things and organizing them appropriately. Like if I am talking through a toxic relationship I had, in my mind it’s like I have one box that’s for the things connected directly to that person, another box for the things that are directly connected to me and my issues, and finally, another box for the things that I have attached to that relationship but really aren’t a part of it. My work in therapy is to dump out all of the stuff I have that I feel is in any way connected to that toxic relationship and sort through it. I have to figure out what’s mine to care for and what isn’t something I have any control over. But seeing all that emotional stuff just thrown out onto the floor of my mind can be hard and overwhelming at times, and, you guessed it, make me feel worse at first. Not to mention that it does take some time to dig through it all and put it into the appropriate box. So being patient with myself as I classify and categorize is important, even though it’s uncomfortable.
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Пікірлер: 297
@ddlovogue
@ddlovogue 3 жыл бұрын
not this being posted mere days after my first ever therapy session and before my second one scheduled for this weekend lmao 🤧
@nicolevx7267
@nicolevx7267 3 жыл бұрын
Honestly , i just got a notification but I’m starting today
@ddlovogue
@ddlovogue 3 жыл бұрын
NicoleVX Yay for us getting the help we need! Hope it goes well, good luck!
@TheWorldsInsight
@TheWorldsInsight 2 жыл бұрын
How it is going now? I'm in the same situation😕
@ddlovogue
@ddlovogue 2 жыл бұрын
@@TheWorldsInsight I stopped going about two and a half months after starting cause the sessions started to feel very monotonous. That’s not to say they didn’t work, they definitely helped a LOT. My therapist just wasn’t a match for me
@LogicPsycho1
@LogicPsycho1 3 жыл бұрын
Sometimes constantly talking about the past can retraumatize us and keep us in a perpetual victimhood mentality. Sometimes being aware of our faults and just work through those is enough to make us better human beings and heal.
@NotTodaySatan557
@NotTodaySatan557 3 жыл бұрын
agreed! have experienced this
@themanwhocouldnotsleep6065
@themanwhocouldnotsleep6065 3 жыл бұрын
Don't you think it's too simplistic? What if we keep making the same mistakes? What if we trully need help? What if no matter how hard we try the problem never goes away? Also most of the time people forget healing is not a painfree process.
@EzequielMartin55vf
@EzequielMartin55vf 3 жыл бұрын
Yes and it gets worse. It's not worth it. l think better to forget and move on no matter what.
@lorilewlewis4915
@lorilewlewis4915 3 жыл бұрын
Therapy made me 100 times worse. I kept reliving my traumas.
@LD-ju7ge
@LD-ju7ge 2 жыл бұрын
I'm at this point rn ... Been in therapy for 2 years on & off since baby daddy's suicide. Thought I was out of there worst of it but was in a very bad place 1 week & called SUICIDE hotline for myself. I get Ann appointment like 6 weeks later when I'm high on live feelings like my old self, then I start having nightmares about him again. I dunno should I cancel this therapy completely but then what if one of those extremely dark as hell days rears its ugly head or a nightmare so real I pick up the phone cause I realised I actually wanna be with him so he won't kill himself, I even half wake up reach for the phone & then it hits me like a punch in the gut & I'm in a tailspin for hours even for days or can be weeks 😭
@reallifepsych3309
@reallifepsych3309 3 жыл бұрын
Such an important discussion. Sometimes therapy causes us to face the traumas that we were suppressing. Self improvement begins with self awareness.
@kennyjohnson2364
@kennyjohnson2364 3 жыл бұрын
btw @reallifepsych, your videos are really good! sincerely, your new subscriber!
@jenniferpiper4728
@jenniferpiper4728 3 жыл бұрын
Sometimes Kati answers the perfect questions just at the right time when they are needed 💖
@Katimorton
@Katimorton 3 жыл бұрын
Awe I am so glad :) xoxo Yay!
@jademorgan6210
@jademorgan6210 3 жыл бұрын
I can’t open up due to the fact that I’ve trusted the wrong people.
@alaaaaa4132
@alaaaaa4132 3 жыл бұрын
but you are the right person to care for
@terirosen7957
@terirosen7957 3 жыл бұрын
@@alaaaaa4132 I love how you said this. It makes so much sense. 💗
@claireemily1983
@claireemily1983 3 жыл бұрын
The pain of feeling worse is what stopped me going. I wish I had someone tell me this at the time of therapy
@Katimorton
@Katimorton 3 жыл бұрын
I am so sorry. I hope you are able to reach back out and see someone again :) xoxo
@amaliasuvac1199
@amaliasuvac1199 3 жыл бұрын
@@Katimorton should we reach out for the same therapist again or for another?
@cosslogan1043
@cosslogan1043 3 жыл бұрын
I can't do zoom therapy, it just makes me feel even more isolated and depressed. So I'm stuck waiting for this mess to end.
@SharlenesJourney
@SharlenesJourney 2 жыл бұрын
I was doing zoom therapy around the pandemic it was so very bad it made it worse because my therapist didn’t even really care about me hope you got out
@claredorgan3414
@claredorgan3414 3 жыл бұрын
I started therapy 2 weeks ago and I’ve felt awful at times this week. Crying so much and feeling very fragile. My sister described talking therapy as picking at a scab and exposing an old wound.
@Sewer.dwelling.rat.
@Sewer.dwelling.rat. 3 жыл бұрын
THANK YOU I thought I was fucking insane for not liking it
@Katimorton
@Katimorton 3 жыл бұрын
Of course!! So glad I could help :) xoxo
@cetvideos
@cetvideos 3 жыл бұрын
I cried in my very first session last week because I had to admit I’ve been keeping all of my insecurities to myself. I felt so vulnerable and uncomfortable, but also feel a weight lifted being able to tell someone and have them understand and want to help me work through it. I’m glad I finally reached out for help!
@dogcatfint5671
@dogcatfint5671 3 жыл бұрын
therapy is like opening a cabinet/closet that you throw everything in to (with the plan to one day go through it) and when you open the door everything falls out.
@user-vn7ce5ig1z
@user-vn7ce5ig1z 3 жыл бұрын
Therapy can make you feel worse when you go into it with high hopes of getting "fixed" but end up with little to no improvement, resulting in depression of being stuck feeling this way. However, there are many, _many_ kinds of therapy and even more medications, so you just have to find a combination that works for you. The problem is that it might take a while and could cost a lot.
@physicstutorials28
@physicstutorials28 3 жыл бұрын
Love this! I'm feeling awful right now because 18 months of EMDR finally got me undissociated and now I'm stuck dealing with intense fight/flight :(
@hannahh8119
@hannahh8119 3 жыл бұрын
I wish you the best!
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
❤️
@Evealaquisina
@Evealaquisina 3 жыл бұрын
I wish you the best with EMDR, I need to do this
@maryannheinsman739
@maryannheinsman739 3 жыл бұрын
I wish you the best, too. I had the same feelings during/after EMDR.
@tyraclay4162
@tyraclay4162 3 жыл бұрын
Let’s be honest this is the reason why we don’t go to therapy or the reason why we quit therapy 😬🤫
@EzequielMartin55vf
@EzequielMartin55vf 3 жыл бұрын
Actually therapy is garbage. it doesn't work they want your money that's all they're a joke. we can do it by ourselves and then move on with life.
@ol2510
@ol2510 2 жыл бұрын
@@EzequielMartin55vf Really? Care to tell us more, since you have it all figured out? What complex issues have you managed to resolve and how long did it take you? Was all that money you saved worth it or did you just waste it? To me working with a professional, investing in my well being and changing unhealthy behaviours seems like a good approach, but I could be wrong and maybe a random guy on YT knows better.
@Khalfrank
@Khalfrank Жыл бұрын
@@ol2510 You're totally wrong and pathetic. Saving money and working on one's self is worth it. All of these quacks care about money and not the well-being of a client.
@Khalfrank
@Khalfrank Жыл бұрын
@Productive Centaur All of them are.
@lamentate07
@lamentate07 Жыл бұрын
@@EzequielMartin55vf It can be garbage for sure if you don't find the right therapist or lack clear outcome goals.
@kissedbyfireskye8428
@kissedbyfireskye8428 3 жыл бұрын
When I go to therapy I relate it to being to puking (I know not nice!) It horrible at first and your purging and feel weak from it but after resting and water you feel relived getting all the bad stuff out. I can relate to this and hope you’re all safe happy & well ❤️❤️
@kelseycornell7039
@kelseycornell7039 3 жыл бұрын
I call this feeling an 'emotional hangover' and it definitely affects me for 12-24 hours after each therapy appointment
@toni2309
@toni2309 3 жыл бұрын
Therapy can make us feel worse when it's not the right fit I guess. I have a lot of experience with feeling like going crazy when being in therapy. My therapist said things, and they didn't fit my views and reality. There seem to be words and phrases and techniques in therapy that trigger me which makes it scary to go to therapy again.
@micheller6804
@micheller6804 3 жыл бұрын
That makes a lot of sense. I hope you find a therapist you match with better.
@Khalfrank
@Khalfrank Жыл бұрын
Make therapy illegal.
@toni2309
@toni2309 3 жыл бұрын
For me, CBT made me feel partially worse because it made me realize that some of my anxiety is quite reasonable, so I have reason to be worried, and fuelled my already great obsession with overanalyzing everything.
@faeriesmak
@faeriesmak 3 жыл бұрын
I had this recently happen when I found out that something that I attributed to a symptom of my anxiety ended up being an actual medical problem that I need treatment for.
@toni2309
@toni2309 3 жыл бұрын
@@faeriesmak I realized that parts of my anxiety are due to sensory processing disorder, and that kind of freaked me out. I have a hard time seeing how the world is not scary when it is physical reality that my senses are that sensitive and a lot of things that create much sensory input are either unavoidable or actually fun so I would want to do them.
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
@@toni2309 I also didn’t realize my sensory issues was causing anxiety, but once I figured this out, I was able to better prevent & control my sensory stimuli. I make sure to always wear comfortable clothing and if I know I’m going to be in a stressful situation I’ll wear my favorite materials. I figured out compression makes a huge difference in my anxiety so now I always have compression shorts underneath my pants & a compression vest if I know it’s going to be a high anxiety day. I also got special sound reduction ear plugs & always stim toys with me. The biggest difference was getting on an SSRI antidepressant because it was able to reduce my sensitivity to texture & sound. Hope this helps!
@faeriesmak
@faeriesmak 3 жыл бұрын
@@toni2309 Wow! That is super interesting. I am going to have to think about that one. I find it difficult to be in my Mom's part of the house (she is elderly and lives with us) for much time because she has her TV on as well as a radio constantly and I find it overwhelming...especially then if she starts to talk to me on top of all of those things.
@patrickhanson712
@patrickhanson712 3 жыл бұрын
Same, it took addressing that to stop and regroup, sort how to process.
@philipcochran1934
@philipcochran1934 3 жыл бұрын
Right on time. I’m working with some folks in a support group & this is just what was needed! Thank you
@SlowMoBeam
@SlowMoBeam 3 жыл бұрын
I just feel worse that I wasted $100 for an hour of me pouring out my feelings, and expressing that I desperately needed help and guidance; because nothing seems to be going right, I have no hope for the future, legitimately have no friends… and my therapist gave me the golden nugget of knowledge of “you seem fine, stop comparing yourself to others, and I’d maybe suggest branching out to more hobbies…”
@melissafigueiraferreira5794
@melissafigueiraferreira5794 3 жыл бұрын
It makes us feel worse because basically we are opening up to a complete stranger, (which is already tough in itself), who we think will make us feel better, when in reality he just stays there listening and not actually adding that much new advice or solutions to our problems. At the end of the day only we can do something for ourselves to feel better, not someone else.
@twobeatheart
@twobeatheart 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for doing this. It hurts and you get frustrated. You don't walk out happy and refreshed
@Katimorton
@Katimorton 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah it can take awhile before you leave therapy feeling happy and refreshed.. xoxo
@kerrylarmand6301
@kerrylarmand6301 3 жыл бұрын
Its possible?....😪
@twobeatheart
@twobeatheart 3 жыл бұрын
@@kerrylarmand6301 yes 😭
@sdzielinski
@sdzielinski 3 жыл бұрын
The therapeutic gooal: To become authentic. Authenticity does not rule out feeling bad. It often requires feeling bad.
@syawkcab
@syawkcab 3 жыл бұрын
Tbh I feel like I get better therapy from this youtube channel than from my actual therapist
@wellingtonsboots4074
@wellingtonsboots4074 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Kati. I have experienced times when I've brought up some really hard stuff and then suddenly the session is over and I am left to deal with it. There are also those times when I realise that my therapist is only human and doesn't have a magic wand to take away the hurt.
@ig7157
@ig7157 3 жыл бұрын
i have a question: how can i tell when i’m ready to stop going to therapy?
@lisasnoozy3749
@lisasnoozy3749 3 жыл бұрын
It is so worth it! But yes there are days that therapy wears me out for the entire day. But hang in there! It really does work. And sometimes it's a really slow process!
@BookmarksandBookshelves
@BookmarksandBookshelves 3 жыл бұрын
I tried therapy twice. Failed twice. One was standard marriage counseling and the therapist sided with my husband on everything and placed the blame solely on me. We were able to dump him and work through everything on our own. My personal therapist didn't want to talk to me, but simply told me books to read. She actually said to me she was really busy and "My actual patients are more important than my online clients." Made me feel terrible. 😞
@pourpeopledrinks
@pourpeopledrinks 3 жыл бұрын
I spent my day pre-therapy feeling okay and able to person...after therapy I took a four hour nap, struggled to meet a friend for drinks on time and have spent all the time post-drinks just sobbing and totally out of control of my emotions. This came at the perfect time as I'm feeling so out of control and helpless. I just want to feel in control of my own feelings again :( I'm so tired and sad and lonely and hopeless that I can't decide if I want to lash out and take it out on others or project inwards and take it out on myself. I hate everything and i'd like a two week vacation from feeling anything, please and thanks :c
@lindaeissa3669
@lindaeissa3669 Жыл бұрын
*hugs u* I'm so sorry..❤
@shinigami956
@shinigami956 3 жыл бұрын
In my case was because, I was going to a bad therapist, to the point I don't want to go to a new one.
@nelli452
@nelli452 3 жыл бұрын
This is so validating. I've always had a love hate relationship with therapy because of this reason!
@Emily-eh5bq
@Emily-eh5bq 3 жыл бұрын
I had a breakdown after starting therapy in 2015 and starting to confront the abuse I received as a child. It's 2021 and I'm still struggling and haven't recovered to where I was. I can't find a therapist that can help me sort out any of the problems I have, and none seem to have the skills to help me move past them. I hate feeling stuck. I'll be broken 6 years come October, and in a major depressive episode for 3 years. I'm not even keeping my head above water now, I'm actively drowning. This feeling is so terrible and I wish I'd never started therapy. I'm so alone.
@geekyogurtcup
@geekyogurtcup 3 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry you're experiencing adverse effects from therapy, Josh. I hope that one day you can heal and live the life you are meant to. Sending my best wishes your way xxoo ❤❤
@Veronikaperz
@Veronikaperz 3 жыл бұрын
Love this video. This explains sooo much. I did therapy for a while and I hated it. Now I know why. This makes sense. It's definitely a process and we have to be patient when going over trauma we haven't talked about in years, or pretty much never. Thank you!! 💓💓
@delilahhart4398
@delilahhart4398 2 ай бұрын
I once had a therapist who made me feel worse, but she offered no solutions. It's been over 20 years, and I still hate her.
@CatharsisByProxy
@CatharsisByProxy Жыл бұрын
I have a friend in my life that I love very much and have been (gently) encouraging to try therapy for years. Now that they've finally given it a try and been going consistently, I'm noticing they've become SO much more touchy and just flat-out irritable than ever. We got into a big argument yesterday over some rude thing I felt they had done to me, which turned into a fight about how I'm just "not being patient" with them. And at first I had the urge to double-down and argue my case even more - I felt like them asking for patience was just another way of telling me to just put up with the rudeness and stick up for myself less (which in retrospect does seem to be a sign that I might have some unresolved baggage still lingering around from my own past bad relationships, but I digress). Basically, the more my friend and I talked about it, the more I considered what "be patient with me" really meant to them, especially considering what they're going through right now- They're living sober for the first time in their entire adult life and trying to face their deepest darkest fears and shortcomings at the same time. Pile all that on top of the rest of life's usual day-to-day problems and that's probably more than enough to bring a "rude tone" out of just about anybody some days. Also realizing how lucky i am because my support system has always given me the freedom to have my bad moods and make my mistakes without holding it against me. I really want to practice doing the same for them, too. I think it's normal to have kinda high expectations for how others behave around us but I also think it's normal to not always live up to people's expectations of us. I've found that mutual trust and forgiveness are what help keep the peace as we navigate those challenges though.
@phoenixdvt
@phoenixdvt 3 жыл бұрын
Therapy is alsohard when you want to express intenseb anger to then hear them say ton be careful because they're required to call the police if you b express violent impulses.
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
It’s a delicate balance because a therapist has responsibility to act if you are in danger or you are putting someone else in danger.
@rainbowandre9580
@rainbowandre9580 3 жыл бұрын
The therapist should know the difference between thinking about horrible things and actually being capable of doing them.
@phoenixdvt
@phoenixdvt 3 жыл бұрын
@kati what do you think about my statement.
@akat3628
@akat3628 3 жыл бұрын
When talking about those sorts of things I've found it helpful to explain to the therapist that it's just a thought and feeling but not something that you plan on acting on...that you are wanting to get help for having those thoughts.
@rainbowandre9580
@rainbowandre9580 3 жыл бұрын
@@akat3628 This!!! It is actually not uncommon to have bad scary thoughts but having them too frequently could be indicative of an Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder or something else so it is important to talk about it if the thoughts are distressing to you.
@nikkidazz
@nikkidazz 3 жыл бұрын
I love this video! And I looooove the emojams they’re SO FUN! Thanks Kati 🥰
@meninpursuitofpurpose3331
@meninpursuitofpurpose3331 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for another accurately articulated video! The logical advice Kati Morton offers is priceless to the practice of any psychological clinician, counsellor, or therapist. Great videos!
@gamefreakgirl89
@gamefreakgirl89 3 жыл бұрын
My bf has recently started therapy and he has planned to go for another session in the near future ^^
@mikhaelahhh
@mikhaelahhh 3 жыл бұрын
Really needed to hear this!
@JulesA5266
@JulesA5266 3 жыл бұрын
New to the channel. Thank you for the amazing content!! I usually try to schedule my therapy sessions later in the evening because sometimes, it just ruins my day.
@estellestar1473
@estellestar1473 3 жыл бұрын
One other reason that therapy makes me feel worse than I all ready do is my family therapist disagrees with what I try to say. They make me feel almost denounced, disputing my feelings. For example, in a session my mother asked if I only write negative things in my journal and claimed that if I did this it would be bad because I would only see people in a negative way. The therapist asked me for my response. I said that my mother was "very rude" and started defending people who only write about their bad experiences and explaining why it's necessary to work through them. The therapist asked to share their thoughts. I said that I was uncertain if I wished for them to because I felt overwhelmed with emotion. They said that they would just go ahead: "What your mother said was not rude. She had a good question." Later the therapist told me that the focus on my journal is appropriate if I'm referring to it all of the time; it's not private and personal anymore. The therapist didn't understand that I was upset because my mother was crossing a boundary by prying into my journal.
@anner9438
@anner9438 3 жыл бұрын
Thanks for saying "you are definitely worth it" at the end of the video...that`s a good reminder whenever it gets tough...
@n.oneimportant5
@n.oneimportant5 3 жыл бұрын
I don't think I'm worth it.
@anner9438
@anner9438 3 жыл бұрын
Then you're worth working up to the point where you think you're worth it 🙃
@patrickhanson712
@patrickhanson712 3 жыл бұрын
That was perfect, Im just about to return to therapy/ treatment and that identified a lot of the reasons it hasnt yet taken hold, but has moved in right direction. Thank you much!!!!
@ollylolly
@ollylolly 3 жыл бұрын
This is so helpful! Thank you Kati 💕
@TreespeakerOfTheLand
@TreespeakerOfTheLand 3 жыл бұрын
When you acknowledge and work through the issues, your symptoms can temporarily get worse. The symptoms are not the issue, but are how the mind reacts to the issue. Credit to Randolph Nesse's book Good reasons for Bad Feelings, since it taught me this
@NotTodaySatan557
@NotTodaySatan557 3 жыл бұрын
Im so thankful for this video! Definitely am going through this
@Paul-sy6qo
@Paul-sy6qo 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you! I really needed to hear this.
@Ingridlosneslokken
@Ingridlosneslokken 3 жыл бұрын
Thanks for making this video Kati 💛
@parmiskatouzian3903
@parmiskatouzian3903 3 жыл бұрын
Sometimes it’s the therapist as well, when they don’t make us feel safe, they betray our confidentiality.
@ayarose1552
@ayarose1552 3 жыл бұрын
I needed this, thank you!
@lillianwiley1114
@lillianwiley1114 3 жыл бұрын
Thanks so much for this! 🧡
@McBummly
@McBummly 3 жыл бұрын
Years ago i tried going to see a therapist. Buuut from my own anxiety and stuff i never went back. Wish it was someone like you who is calm and friendly and welcoming. The man i saw wasnt the nicest person.
@admirbarucija2018
@admirbarucija2018 3 жыл бұрын
I have my first session with my new therapist tomorrow!! Can’t wait to see the video ❤️
@Katimorton
@Katimorton 3 жыл бұрын
Awe yay! I hope your session goes well!! xoxo
@admirbarucija2018
@admirbarucija2018 3 жыл бұрын
@@Katimorton Awe thank you so much!! I really appreciate it!
@faeriesmak
@faeriesmak 3 жыл бұрын
Mine is today. Good luck!
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
You got this!! 👍❤️
@admirbarucija2018
@admirbarucija2018 3 жыл бұрын
@@_just_TK Thank you so much!! 🙏🏻❤️
@mncvideo
@mncvideo 3 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Katie. Hope you are doing good on both places.
@marissashantez6051
@marissashantez6051 2 жыл бұрын
Therapy fosters dependence, and they dont make you feel worse; They make you worse, period.
@hannahh8119
@hannahh8119 3 жыл бұрын
But aren't there also times, when you don't feel better because (this) therapy doesn't work for you? Because I feel like therapy for me is just talking without developpement.. I don't feel like I am learning how to deal with myself, my life. I don't think I feel worse it is maybe indifferent. I have the feeling that I am going nowhere.
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
You may find this video helpful! kzfaq.info/get/bejne/gNF7ocV7xtnWY2w.html
@binuamy6543
@binuamy6543 3 жыл бұрын
Hiii Kati, I'm from Sri Lanka 🇱🇰. Thank you so much for doing these videos. Really helpful. Love & Hugs. ❤️🙏
@coasterb1
@coasterb1 3 жыл бұрын
Great reminder, we are in therapy for a reason and we might feel worse before getting better. I saw Catan on your Amazon recommendations, would you do a video on the benefits of playing board games?
@aaronsc1936
@aaronsc1936 3 жыл бұрын
Again! Really helpful! Thank you, kati
@serenity8839
@serenity8839 3 жыл бұрын
I think it was the realization that, yer these problems were caused by others, but others cant fix it i have too o_o. Like Who designed this system, i wana refund! Still gets to me, and i assume others even after therapy is finished, i assume it will stay that way forever, but its sadness over something rather then sadness over something i dont understand.
@christinemcfadyen9151
@christinemcfadyen9151 3 жыл бұрын
I feel the same way, it's like, "Well your parents screwed up, now you have to spend the time and money and do all the work!"
@serenity8839
@serenity8839 3 жыл бұрын
@@christinemcfadyen9151 Honestly this too a tee. ^^ Its also a life long battle for alot of people which is... alot of time o_o!
@CarolinvonPetzholdt
@CarolinvonPetzholdt 3 жыл бұрын
I will need to check out your memberships.
@livinwithliv5535
@livinwithliv5535 3 жыл бұрын
I just found this and I’m so happy I did! A lot of times in black house holds, growing up you’re taught what goes on in this house stays in this house. With that’s being said I was also told that growing up and when I started IOP at 15 and then therapy the next month it didn’t make me feel any better than I did before because a lot of trauma I experienced happened within my family and house hold and I didn’t want to open up about that. I didn’t start opening up about my childhood trauma until this year and I’m 20 now. Even now I feel really bad about sharing all of that because I feel like I’m letting my family down or sharing something I probably shouldn’t have, even though it’s my therapist and I can trust her. But it has made me feel better in the long run because I feel like I’ve gotten so much off my chest and off my mind that I’ve been holding in for years!
@sportsnerdtv4506
@sportsnerdtv4506 2 жыл бұрын
Therapy is far from easy. Still trying to get over childhood abuse. I feel blessed that I found a patient, intelligent, and emotionally available therapist who helps me feel empowered. It's not easy. Sometimes I feel like king kong and some days I feel very emotional and tender. Grant yourself patience. Remember that you matter. Stay strong and take it one day at a time.
@nuageartstudio
@nuageartstudio 2 жыл бұрын
I thought I was going crazy.... started therapy ... but last session just left me so lost .... Can't think about of grounding statements 😕 😪....just makes me overwhelmed 😪.... feeling like I am not getting better 😕
@Em91s
@Em91s 3 жыл бұрын
WHO DISLIKES FREE MENTAL HEALTH VIDEOS PLS SOMEONE ANSWER ME IM SOCKED
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
SERIOUSLY!!!
@g8terbyte
@g8terbyte 3 жыл бұрын
Unfortunately I recently loss my grandfather and I’m still processing that as well as some other things currently that have nothing to do with that. Your absolutely right therapy is not an easy process but I really find it extremely beneficial if you work with it and have some time and patience for yourself and get to the actual root of the problem.
@jansmycka4338
@jansmycka4338 3 жыл бұрын
Video starts at 0:56
@nikkimckay860
@nikkimckay860 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for shareing this video about why therapy can make us feel worse . it was both helpful and calming to my mind. I often think back to my first and only therapy session s back in 2019 upto January 2020 last year. Sad how my therapy wasn't helping me my thoughts on the subject are as follows. I'd only smile and feel fine while I was in therapy talking to my psychologist sadly when I left after my session s each week I'd feel worse. I come out of therapy feeling no different to how I felt when I started it. hopefully next time will be different thanks again kati for this video 😥
@larissalees5260
@larissalees5260 3 жыл бұрын
You are brilliant, watched your videos for a long time thanks so much 🙏x
@jyotikadam8459
@jyotikadam8459 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the video❤️
@katiswan3160
@katiswan3160 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you Kati ❤️for creating this wonderful video ❤️. Is it normal to feel anxiety after a therapy session?
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
Yep! You may find this video helpful! kzfaq.info/get/bejne/obF2hLiCv9PLaH0.html
@sounddilemma7559
@sounddilemma7559 3 жыл бұрын
The worst experience I had, was when I was trying to figure out my family crap, and all my therapist cared about was why I don't get a car and spent 30min trying to push me to get a car and never ever took no for an answer. (I just literally don't need one at the moment. Also I grew up in a big city and got used to not having one.) Then the therapist's conclusion was I don't think I need a car because I cannot afford one -- and I was like WHAT??? Can we go back to talk about my sucky family crap or what?? That therapist made it extremely hard for me to trust any male therapist and I still feel threatened seeing people that look similar to him. That's said, I do second that going to therapy does help immensely, when having a right therapist. Even if the first few sessions may make things worse. But if you find after 2 years (yeah I should've made the decision sooner) your therapist still doesn't get you, maybe it is time to move on...
@wheres_bears1378
@wheres_bears1378 6 ай бұрын
I doubt his gender had anything to do with it, most therapists are a waste of time.
@ghostie7790
@ghostie7790 3 жыл бұрын
In the beginning where the frame was slowly moving to the right, I thought I was going crazy😂
@supermichaelssecondchannel4342
@supermichaelssecondchannel4342 3 жыл бұрын
I have been sleeping a lot better so thank God for that.
@marylnmonroe
@marylnmonroe Жыл бұрын
Ive been doing Self-Therapy after spending many years seeing one in person and virtually. I discussed my desire to self-treat with my last therapist and she said i would be a great candidate for it upon our last session together. I want to say the feelings are hard to explain I feel better, happier, joyful and peaceful, but as I shuffle through the traumas there is that feeling of stress coming up, sometimes wanting to close out of the session, or anger. But im seeing a improvement so I know its worth it in the end. I also meditate for 20min after each self therapy session, workout for 30 min then go enjoy a hobby!
@arwaalghamdi4379
@arwaalghamdi4379 3 жыл бұрын
Kati , you are the best ❤️✨
@Kimmy11279
@Kimmy11279 3 жыл бұрын
I hated therapy because nothing was ever acknowledged they sat there and literally said yes to everything so I didn’t feel listened to
@somethingyousaid5059
@somethingyousaid5059 3 жыл бұрын
Very good, very helpful. Thank you.
@mariafernandaf.7553
@mariafernandaf.7553 3 жыл бұрын
I was thinking about take a break or even end the process... now I see why :/
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
You may find this video helpful! kzfaq.info/get/bejne/gNF7ocV7xtnWY2w.html
@RobSalamander
@RobSalamander 3 жыл бұрын
Kati, great video as always. I haven’t pinned it down yet, but your way, style, manner talking about mental health, a very sensitive subject, is magnetic. I discovered meditation when I retired due to health issues, after nearly 30 years in mental health. Personally, meditation and MBSR/CT for me are“The Missing Link” in psychiatry/psychology mental health care. I see your wonderful meditating frog, I have a meditating dog next to my bed. I hear familiar words and phrases in your language that suggest to me you may meditate regularly. I cant go a day without it, and I try and practice mindfulness in my life, it’s simply a better way of living. Meditation is so simple, but a huge subject. The values around MBSR, like the Attitudinal States, enhance practice and living. It’s not a magic bullet, which brings me, I hope......to how it relates to therapy making you feel worse, which is in my experience as a professional, when many stop going, a mistake but understandable. Meditation helps there too. I have had so much therapy in the last ten years, I am bored hearing myself ...but you got to find the right guy...that’s not easy. Now I have and its feeling really, really horrible....or it was, which maybe is why I want to share. Meditation and understanding a different way of looking at pain and suffering has been vital in helping me look where I do not want to, in my heart, but have been driven to by my head and knowledge. You have to learn to be with pain, to even welcome it in a healthy way....mental pain....emotional pain, not the physical pain many of us find really quite easy to be with. Thank you for your generosity.
@thepincushion1835
@thepincushion1835 3 жыл бұрын
Can you do a video on why it’s so hard to find a therapist? I’ve been looking for a therapist since early June. I’ve been calling around everyday but somehow all of the therapists near me are not taking appointments or they just don’t answer my calls. It’s extremely defeating to not even receive help from those obligated to help others.
@pezkandy
@pezkandy 3 жыл бұрын
ILYSM, Kati
@tbearmcconnelly1762
@tbearmcconnelly1762 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Katie,thank you for another great video. Just wondering tho,what if after yrs an yrs of therapy,you still just keep getting worse?? No coping techniques really help,I end up self harming worse after therapy,I journal every day & still have nightmares about my childhood nearly nightly but nothing ever changes,no matter how much work I put into getting better. I ended up having to walk away from therapy cuz I was becoming a danger to myself & no therapist would give me coping strategies. What can I try next??
@jackricketts7025
@jackricketts7025 3 жыл бұрын
Hey Kati I hope you have been well and stayed safe
@Leah_Michelle_21
@Leah_Michelle_21 3 жыл бұрын
I needed to hear this right now
@lailafallon2936
@lailafallon2936 3 жыл бұрын
I have had six counsellors/therapists since I was eleven. The first one dismissed me claiming I was fine and didn't need counselling, the second was a highly demanded scientist who saw into your aura, the third was a herbal therapist (who i haven't seen since September because of covid), the fourth was the school counsellor who was disrespectfully blunt and said things that triggered my anxiety, the fifth lived several miles away and was just cruel. I was on the very edge and saw no point in life anymore so my mum took me to her because she had fantastic reviews, I had a panic attack in front of her after she told me she doesn't want to waste her time on me if I don't want help. I never said I didn't want help. I was suffering really badly with social anxiety and felt afraid of therapy at that time, she was a hypnotherapist who would make me rate every session out of 10. The last new one I saw treated me like a child and patronised the life out of me. After I stopped seeing her my mum tried to see her and honestly she was given the worst advice from that woman.
@user-ow7tx3pk9x
@user-ow7tx3pk9x 3 жыл бұрын
This is one of the reasons why i still haven’t reach out yet i’m scared to feel that way again
@mackfam9798
@mackfam9798 3 жыл бұрын
kati you are the best and i wish sometimes you were my therpist. i love you and have a good day! :)
@eugenesesmaiii3278
@eugenesesmaiii3278 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the video, Kate! I have a question. How might I approach talking to my therapist about no longer having sessions? I'm moving into a new place and the extra couple hundred a month would really help. Trying to prioritize my spending but I feel a lot of anxiety about saying I don't want to see her anymore. Guilt, I guess. Idk any advice is appreciated! Thanks :)
@jrr2045
@jrr2045 3 жыл бұрын
I don't have any of the drug or self harm coping mechanisms, but I still feel like I'm in a really bad spot in therapy. I'm trying to drop my coping mechanisms that are stopping me from being happy and connected with people. Like putting on a mask, trying to be whatever I think people need me to be. And dropping all of the things I do to please others has left me completely bare. Like I'm just nothing underneath that stuff. So I plummeted into a depression. And now my psych wants me to go on meds. I feel like I haven't been taken care of very well.
@a.o.9594
@a.o.9594 3 жыл бұрын
After a year of therapy, it is like I finally woken up to the fact that I really do I need the help. I thought I was getting better until I felt the bs come all up again. I have the intention this year of trying even harder to the point maybe one day (even if it is ten years away) I may be able to ease back my meds to the point were I don’t need them.
@DaphneGsell
@DaphneGsell 3 жыл бұрын
I was on a spiritual journey and I felt great! Then I got into therapy and now I’m sad a lot more
@frankikootcher1441
@frankikootcher1441 3 жыл бұрын
I’ve been in and out of therapy for 7 years. I haven’t noticed individual therapy making me feel worse but I was recently in a partial program and that was awful and made me feel A LOT worse
@Misshin_
@Misshin_ Жыл бұрын
My therapist rn is just twisting my words and making it sound like I’ve said things that I haven’t. For example I said my anxiety is less around my friends and later said I have at least some anxiety every second of every day and she said “but you said when you’re with your friends you don’t have any anxiety.” Another example is when I said I have issues with being looked at while eating and then she tried to relate that to being judged instead of letting me explain my food related issues (trust issues regarding food). She’s also just been repeating the same type of coping exercises like 5 senses and breathing exercises that I’ve told her don’t work for me. I don’t understand why and she won’t help figure out why she just keeps shoving the same thing down my throat in a slightly different way. It’s like trying to fit the square block into the circle hole from those baby games in different ways thinking it’ll just eventually fit if you shove it in hard enough. I’m honestly abt to quit and might look into different stuff and even maybe a service dog (when I’m older due to horrible family issues rn). The therapist I had before this one only focused on how my mom felt and made it to where my mom had to sit in with me every session. Modern talk therapy is honestly a failing system for youth at this point 💀
@denisefuentes7905
@denisefuentes7905 3 жыл бұрын
At times??? It ALWAYS makes me feel worse.
@merrydamegnagna9907
@merrydamegnagna9907 3 жыл бұрын
my last therapist made me feel worse for other reasons: I have been diagnosed with ADHD but every time I would talk about things that I struggle with and that are clearly symtomes of ADHD, my therapist would never make the link. it felt like I had to do all the research on my illness while she knewnothing about it and didn't care to educate herself... I was feeling worse and doing worse because the solutions and exercices she was giving me were not relevent to me. Your therapists incompetence is also a very real and frequent reason why someone would feel worse. I am yet to find a therapist who knows anything about ADHD, the search continues.
@fifilafleur5555
@fifilafleur5555 3 жыл бұрын
Therapy used to make me feel terrible. The therapists I had though back then had been influenced by a meddling uncle to keep the family secrets covered instead of addressing the *real issues* I was struggling with.
@OMGitsKristinaxD
@OMGitsKristinaxD 3 жыл бұрын
any advice for what we do when we’re just not in the mood for therapy? Like I’m getting to a point in my therapy sessions where every appointment feels repetitive. I know I need therapy, but I’m so tired of it.
@_just_TK
@_just_TK 3 жыл бұрын
You may find this video helpful! kzfaq.info/get/bejne/lbF7mraCur69qKM.html
@youtongwang6273
@youtongwang6273 3 жыл бұрын
Hi Kati! I recently started work on my past trauma but immediately after my first session, I started having a new symptom, which is that unpleasant images would enter my mind repeated and I can not shut them off. I’m afraid if this would be permanent. Do you think it is going to be?
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