Will Reclassifying Weed Help Biden? | How Trump’s Lawyers Keep Him Awake

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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Күн бұрын

President Biden may be easing marijuana restrictions to boost his flagging support among young people, and Donald Trump can’t stay awake in court during his hush money trial.
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Пікірлер: 2 300
@Tcat421
@Tcat421 15 күн бұрын
They need to Pardon all weed related felonies so we can vote .
@morbidmanmusic
@morbidmanmusic 15 күн бұрын
Who ya talking to?
@TheEvolver311
@TheEvolver311 15 күн бұрын
Biden has pardoned lots of weed related Federal charges Biden can't pardon State level offenders that is on the Governors of the State
@katelynna10000
@katelynna10000 9 күн бұрын
I can say from personal experience that felons CAN in fact vote. However, there's paperwork you have to get signed that says you are off probation and have payed all your fines (which is a problem in and of itself, but this comment can only be so long). The idea that felons can't vote is purposefully spread to keep us from doing so. Look up what is needed to be able to register to vote in your area!
@kylehd7
@kylehd7 12 сағат бұрын
...what?
@denniswinters3096
@denniswinters3096 15 күн бұрын
If they are going to ease restrictions on weed, they need to review the ridiculously harsh sentences of people who are now in prison because of it.
@rosee.2431
@rosee.2431 15 күн бұрын
Absolutely 💯
@pamelahomeyer748
@pamelahomeyer748 15 күн бұрын
Obama Started releasing people from prison with minor charges from things like marijuana and Mitch McConnell won't have it
@gaypatterson4446
@gaypatterson4446 15 күн бұрын
Agreed.
@korbindallas4552
@korbindallas4552 15 күн бұрын
The Individual States set those laws. Like Arizona's life sentence for distribution of a drug. So selling a $25 sack is a lifetime sentence.
@derithross8314
@derithross8314 15 күн бұрын
Yes especially when pedophiles have a damn ass revolving door
@Moonmaedyn
@Moonmaedyn 15 күн бұрын
Maybe they should try a SHOCK COLLAR to keep him awake? I'd pay money to watch that...
@stevendurante3485
@stevendurante3485 15 күн бұрын
But I wouldn't put it on his neck.
@SugarandSarcasm
@SugarandSarcasm 15 күн бұрын
Shh, that's for sweeps week. Or his lawyer's new defence fund
@arithiel
@arithiel 13 күн бұрын
​@@stevendurante3485 anywhere else it'd slide right off...
@kitcobain444
@kitcobain444 15 күн бұрын
Working in Corrections as an RN, reclassification of Marijuana is crucial for not ruining young adult's lives and keeping jails less crowded. You see 20 somethings getting arrested for possession of a single joint 😳 and it is craziness! Legalize the stuff everywhere already!! And no, I don't smoke. It's not for me. 🗳💙
@alfalfas2849
@alfalfas2849 15 күн бұрын
Wow bro u might be the one good cop
@motherterezzza3466
@motherterezzza3466 15 күн бұрын
I got busted for stems and seeds in the late 70’s. That was on my record for YEARS. Still is. HR just laughs when I tell them when asked if I have a record. Sheesh.
@phillip2169
@phillip2169 15 күн бұрын
Stay safe
@trekkiejunk
@trekkiejunk 15 күн бұрын
But this could hurt all those poor private prisons' bottom line! You don't want to put those poor, family-owned private prisons out of business, do you?
@kitcobain444
@kitcobain444 15 күн бұрын
@trekkiejunk That's the thing, I work at the federal and state government funded jail, not a prison. Yet there are inmates doing short time for bogus marijuana possession charges. We do have a work release program, but it's crowded as well. Not to mention a felony charge. I agree with your sentiment, though.
@lindasensabaugh4013
@lindasensabaugh4013 15 күн бұрын
As an old lady (72) I vote yes for legal weed. I grew up with pot but never used. It was in my late 50’s I was forced to try pot for pain after 8 spine surgeries. I do not smoke but am very happy for edibles. I make green butter then cook and bake with it. Here in Virginia we can grow plants but not buy pot. It’s still crazy that marijuana was ever put in a category like heroine. You can get anything you want in the mail.
@Erlewyn
@Erlewyn 15 күн бұрын
As a general rule, saying "it should be legalized for recreation because it's useful medically" is never a good argument.
@TrickOrRetreat
@TrickOrRetreat 15 күн бұрын
The beer liqueur plastic etc producers have been lobbying against it for 50 years. It's on schedule 1 because bribery. Since hemp is better than plastic and even steel. They feared that legalizing hemp would shut em down.
@bunyipdragon9499
@bunyipdragon9499 15 күн бұрын
Green butter ? That's a new one, what's the ratio of green to butter ! 💜
@TrickOrRetreat
@TrickOrRetreat 15 күн бұрын
​@@Erlewynit opened up the door for a broader legalization. So the argument was useful.
@colejosephalexanderkashay683
@colejosephalexanderkashay683 15 күн бұрын
​@Erlewyn it should be legalized and be over the counter like cold medicine or asprin.
@charlesmartin1121
@charlesmartin1121 15 күн бұрын
"If he wins." We lose.
@JamesSullivan-fq9bw
@JamesSullivan-fq9bw 15 күн бұрын
That's right. If Biden wins, we lose. To vote for Biden is to flush yourself down the toilet.
@victorpradha9946
@victorpradha9946 15 күн бұрын
The entire world loses...except for Russia and China!
@erickworthington7211
@erickworthington7211 15 күн бұрын
If he wins..there's no justice
@baxtronx5972
@baxtronx5972 15 күн бұрын
If he wins, it was stolen.
@Omsip123
@Omsip123 15 күн бұрын
If he wins, it’s the fault and responsibility of the democrats
@kathleengust6878
@kathleengust6878 15 күн бұрын
That person should not be on the cover of Time magazine. He should be doing time in jail.
@bunzeebear2973
@bunzeebear2973 15 күн бұрын
Or maybe on vanity magazines where they do bathrooms & toilets. Outhouse Outlet Today?
@janncoons7445
@janncoons7445 15 күн бұрын
Biden is on a roll accomplishing one task after the other. Absolutely amazing I'm voting blue all the way down the ballot💙💙💙💙
@jjfalarka8837
@jjfalarka8837 15 күн бұрын
really ? Accomplished leaving 17 million illegals in the country > Gas prices going up and electricity 30 percent during his term. Biden really ? No worries you will be paying dearly to maintain those illegals on section 8
@bitbugsbyte
@bitbugsbyte 15 күн бұрын
Me too!! I reluctantly voted for Biden last time but I will wholeheartedly for him again in 2024! His work is beyond impressive.
@SarcasticOldMan-cy9mf
@SarcasticOldMan-cy9mf 15 күн бұрын
@@bitbugsbyte What will you do if they are both in jail? Biden may get his day in court with the ICJ for his war crimes and crimes against humanity. This would be soon, if there is any justice left in the world.
@trappedkitty5335
@trappedkitty5335 15 күн бұрын
Beware a fast-moving government with no checks on their power.
@gus8824
@gus8824 15 күн бұрын
Reclassifying cannabis will make it way easier for medical institutions to study and research, potentially finding new uses or debunking false claims accurately, this is important
@bovinityleak2066
@bovinityleak2066 15 күн бұрын
Yes!
@jamesmorett6184
@jamesmorett6184 15 күн бұрын
The National Geographic magazine issued a front cover in April 2015 that clearly stated. " Cannibis may be the miracle cancer cure we have been looking for !! The front cover !! Israel has studied cannabis and have come up with some amazing results !! But it is suppressed because they charge outrageous money for chemo that is cheap to make and rarely works
@Tustin2121
@Tustin2121 15 күн бұрын
It is important and should have been done ages ago, and it’s really stupid that it’s apparently *only* being done because everyone is pissed at the president for not cutting off weapons and funding being actively used for ethnic cleaning. 😩
@paulwarner2432
@paulwarner2432 15 күн бұрын
@@Tustin2121 He started the process to review rescheduling it back in 2022. So this has been ongoing. More information here: www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/statements-releases/2022/10/06/statement-from-president-biden-on-marijuana-reform/
@ThatOpalGuy
@ThatOpalGuy 15 күн бұрын
they kept it schedule 1 because of two things: pharmaceutical profits and religious ignorance.
@ivareskesner2019
@ivareskesner2019 15 күн бұрын
Only one way to find out. Legalise it and give it the same status as alcohol. That is more than fair, considering just how much more harmful alcohol is. I really fi d it the height of absurdity that a killer like alcohol is legal while a medicine like weed isn't.
@Zaddy-Lu
@Zaddy-Lu 15 күн бұрын
Yup! You can't overdose on weed, the comedown isn't dangerous, people don't get violent on it, and it effectively treats pain (instead of masking it like alcohol does) there is NO good reason for cannabis to be illegal.
@ivareskesner2019
@ivareskesner2019 15 күн бұрын
@@Zaddy-Lu Hear hear.
@wizardsuth
@wizardsuth 15 күн бұрын
@@Zaddy-Lu It's often smoked and causes impaired judgement and a lack of co-ordination, so it needs to be regulated similarly to both tobacco and alcohol.
@dp1563
@dp1563 15 күн бұрын
Cigarettes are the worst drugs out there.
@andrewr7820
@andrewr7820 15 күн бұрын
We sometimes occupy dementia patients with "busy work" tasks like folding towels. Seems like the stack of papers is their version of that approach.
@traceythompson1092
@traceythompson1092 15 күн бұрын
I take care of a person with dementia; and she can spend hours reading the same 3 or 4 letters or rearranging the books she has stacked in her room😢
@johntidey8734
@johntidey8734 14 күн бұрын
You hit the bullseye nurses not lawyers
@shaerenuel9950
@shaerenuel9950 11 күн бұрын
But don't worry!, he's assured us he's aced his cognitive test...
@areyoufriendly
@areyoufriendly 15 күн бұрын
“If He Wins” Guys, there’s no convincing the other side, so just make sure you’re registered to vote and vote early. If you know someone who isn’t registered to vote, get on their ass. This is no-fvcking-around time.
@dk9619
@dk9619 13 күн бұрын
🇺🇲💙🇺🇲
@AndrewJohnson-oy8oj
@AndrewJohnson-oy8oj 15 күн бұрын
Jeez, America. Just legalize it. Every country that has done so has had zero negative effects and has helped create new businesses and income streams.
@galaxyspace76
@galaxyspace76 15 күн бұрын
Tax funds that are much needed too
@Kossumies6
@Kossumies6 15 күн бұрын
Thailand did go back on their legalization but it is quite silly how harsh of a drug category it has. Harmless it isn't but worse drugs (alcohol and tobacco namely) are much more leniently approved.
@juliettebobcat704
@juliettebobcat704 15 күн бұрын
Well in Amsterdam theyre a little tired of the obnoxious tourists, but now they'll get a lot fewer since Germany just decriminalization it with grow your own co-ops.
@Demonlord4546
@Demonlord4546 15 күн бұрын
True, but if they legalize it, the our For-Profit prisons will lose slaves that they use for labor. They gotta keep those prisoners coming in somehow. I hate that that is our reality. Our country needs a rework
@juliettebobcat704
@juliettebobcat704 15 күн бұрын
@Demon Lord. They'll get those prisons full again. With women who have gotten abortions. They have a plan.
@joshuastanton6731
@joshuastanton6731 15 күн бұрын
The idea that cannabis is even close to steroids OR cocaine is ridiculous.
@ElSantoLuchador
@ElSantoLuchador 15 күн бұрын
It's absurd. I live in WA state so I just laugh at it from a distance.
@EmiIsHerexo
@EmiIsHerexo 15 күн бұрын
How is alcohol better than weed? 😂
@divinewon73
@divinewon73 15 күн бұрын
⁠ 🛑Merr Merr Gar Gar is a member of the Fed Errol ist Society which works with the Heritic found ation and provided the project 2025, 920 page document to obliterate the federal government... these are the same organizations that provided Roberts and the rest.☣️ connecting the dots?🤔
@phylis3917
@phylis3917 15 күн бұрын
Still stupid. Remember “Refer Madness”? Defendant has no right to say anything about anything. We’re in SF.💕
@TheKillerman3333
@TheKillerman3333 15 күн бұрын
the reason it is classified as such was becuase a certain president wanted to target hippies and black people but knew it was illegal to do so dirrectly so that president targeted their recreational drugs instead.
@canadianharuka
@canadianharuka 15 күн бұрын
If he passed away in his sleep at the trial, no one would even notice.
@shepinchains1
@shepinchains1 15 күн бұрын
Let us Pray.
@patriciatinkey2677
@patriciatinkey2677 15 күн бұрын
Your Mouth to God's Ears. Probably his base would claim it was a hit...crazy conspiracy theories coming out of the woodwork! 😂🤣😅😁👍🇺🇲💙🇺🇲💙🇺🇲💙🇺🇲
@katkelly-kobes3245
@katkelly-kobes3245 14 күн бұрын
Don't threaten me with a good time!
@Dan-yz4qz
@Dan-yz4qz 14 күн бұрын
He definitely wouldn't be missed
@CharlesBridges-np4hv
@CharlesBridges-np4hv 4 күн бұрын
OR WOULD CARE 🤔
@ramonadviola1755
@ramonadviola1755 15 күн бұрын
That Johnny Carson bit was brilliant. 😂😂😂
@bcollins9152
@bcollins9152 15 күн бұрын
yeah!
@zesty9815
@zesty9815 15 күн бұрын
8:53 But that's the same thing he said last time: _"I only hire the best people"._ And then he fired them _"like dogs"_ and said they were _"dumb as rocks"._
@_Lazare
@_Lazare 15 күн бұрын
Yup ! And while the new hirere found himself he gets let go lol
@ThatOpalGuy
@ThatOpalGuy 15 күн бұрын
basic maga projection
@eternyti
@eternyti 15 күн бұрын
"Oh my god, did someone slaughter a goat in here?" That was Kristi Noem.
@solenoidnull9542
@solenoidnull9542 15 күн бұрын
And some horses, and a puppy, and undoubtedly a bunch of other animals we don't know about as well
@MonkeyJedi99
@MonkeyJedi99 15 күн бұрын
@@solenoidnull9542 Plus, it doesn't count as abortion if you kill the baby after birth when it fails to take out the trash or mow the lawn like a kid is supposed to.
@LindaC616
@LindaC616 15 күн бұрын
She had a cameo 😅
@davidlundquist1979
@davidlundquist1979 15 күн бұрын
Wait, the pit is an INDOOR gravel pit? This is new information!
@DayTukErrJawbs
@DayTukErrJawbs 15 күн бұрын
A bunch of construction workers saw her do it. Then the school bus pulled in minutes later.
@jeremycurtis2334
@jeremycurtis2334 15 күн бұрын
One of the best monologues. Thanks Stephen and thank you writers! You deserve credit!
@lbednaz
@lbednaz 15 күн бұрын
I worked on a detox during college for people from Boston and Cambridge. NO ONE WAS THERE FOR MARIJUANA USE! Most were alcohol and then some prescription drugs with smallest group street drugs. ALCOHOL IS WAY MORE HARMFUL THAN POT!
@toddshantz9003
@toddshantz9003 11 күн бұрын
3:04 3:04
@toddshantz9003
@toddshantz9003 11 күн бұрын
😮
@Tonyhouse1168
@Tonyhouse1168 15 күн бұрын
There’s a zero % chance sleepy don stays awake long enough to hear his son’s name called at graduation.
@Sharsis88
@Sharsis88 15 күн бұрын
Like he's going to actually go to the graduation lol
@ivareskesner2019
@ivareskesner2019 15 күн бұрын
Don Joe? Biden is the sleepy one, no?
@NZKaupoi
@NZKaupoi 15 күн бұрын
​@@Sharsis88 I'll have a dollar on that outcome 😂
@ElSantoLuchador
@ElSantoLuchador 15 күн бұрын
Judge called his bluff. He had no intention of going, but now he has to. Poor Melania.
@alysiareid6659
@alysiareid6659 15 күн бұрын
​@@ivareskesner2019little slow there aren't you? Typical trumpanzee always projecting
@andyb1653
@andyb1653 15 күн бұрын
"Oh man, did someone slaughter a goat in here?!" Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was Kristi Noem
@MrPhotodoc
@MrPhotodoc 15 күн бұрын
The "If He Wins" Time magazine will be right down there with OJ's "If I Did It" book.
@problematicgoose
@problematicgoose 15 күн бұрын
He loves his invisible props. Gotta take care of them and pass them off stage/put them away 😂 sooo many examples in this clip
@A.Radwick
@A.Radwick 15 күн бұрын
Correction: Medicinal meth comes in a variety of forms, the most popular being named "adderall". It is actually not incredibly difficult to find. Legalize. Rescheduling is a step, but not a leap. Legalize cannabis.
@jssamp4442
@jssamp4442 15 күн бұрын
You are confusing amphetamine/dextroamphetamine with methamphetamine. They all belong to a class of organic compounds called substituted phenethylamines, with effects that vary depending on the location and species of the substituent.
@mickimicki
@mickimicki 15 күн бұрын
There used to be "medical meth". It was called Pervitin, and was used for example by the German army in WWII. Related to, but *not* the same drug as dexamphetamine (Adderall, Vyvance).
@pallascat1743
@pallascat1743 15 күн бұрын
Vyvanse is methamphetamine.
@A.Radwick
@A.Radwick 15 күн бұрын
@@jssamp4442 close enough, in my opinion. Cannabis is a lot less complicated and therefore would logically be less regulated. You would agree, correct?
@KS-PNW
@KS-PNW 15 күн бұрын
​@@pallascat1743 Technically it's dextro methamphetamine slightly different but there is just straight up prescription meth
@markhettenbach3141
@markhettenbach3141 15 күн бұрын
If I stayed up till 4am rage tweeting, Id fall asleep at 8am too.
@NexuJin
@NexuJin 15 күн бұрын
Imagine rage tweeting at 4:55 AM asking why someone isn't sleeping
@sebman1982
@sebman1982 15 күн бұрын
That Johnny Carson impression was gold!
@normmaes3218
@normmaes3218 15 күн бұрын
It worked here in Canada, the current Prime Minister campaigned to legalize weed, from coast to coast he swept into power with a great majority. As he walked up to the parliment on his first day he said Sunny days are ahead. If Biden campaigned on legalizing weed he would get greatest majority ever (I perdict) Trump wouldn't stand a chance. Even Republicans would vote for weed.
@secheclare
@secheclare 12 күн бұрын
John Boehner is part of a cannabis company investment fund. I heard several speeches about legalizing cannabis. Have to say Boehner was not on my legalize weed bingo card😂
@walterfristoe4643
@walterfristoe4643 15 күн бұрын
I read that one of Trumpadumpagus's law firms doesn't want to represent him anymore. I guess they're afraid they'll go to prison instead of him.
@Drew-bc7zj
@Drew-bc7zj 15 күн бұрын
Or not get paid. Or have their reputation destroyed.
@DissectGibberish
@DissectGibberish 15 күн бұрын
@@Drew-bc7zj Or all three.
@Mondfischli
@Mondfischli 15 күн бұрын
...worst case: together 😂
@user-nf1op8ti9l
@user-nf1op8ti9l 15 күн бұрын
​@@Mondfischli Standard outcome
@ShineOnBenevolentSun
@ShineOnBenevolentSun 15 күн бұрын
They've been prepaid. But it's hard to be an effective lawyer when your client insists on representing themselves with you there just as a mouthpiece.
@melissaweyrick5311
@melissaweyrick5311 15 күн бұрын
45 is aging like milk
@DSAK55
@DSAK55 15 күн бұрын
and smelling like it
@DissectGibberish
@DissectGibberish 15 күн бұрын
Curdled and stinking.
@user-rn5wy6ox7j
@user-rn5wy6ox7j 15 күн бұрын
Farty-five
@bovinityleak2066
@bovinityleak2066 15 күн бұрын
Yep…. bird flu infected raw cows milk (a real thing).
@oceanoflotion8630
@oceanoflotion8630 15 күн бұрын
That is offensive to cheese
@patriciatoomingtheplantpar2558
@patriciatoomingtheplantpar2558 15 күн бұрын
Channeling Johnny Carson 😂 That toe tip took me way back, lived Johnny!
@Alma1826
@Alma1826 15 күн бұрын
Wow! Stephen Colbert made my day! He’s wonderful!!
@MsDebSteeves
@MsDebSteeves 15 күн бұрын
I love it when Stephen channels his inner Johnny Carson!!! #Yesssss
@jasonleland6978
@jasonleland6978 15 күн бұрын
Light butt play.
@Sharonmxg
@Sharonmxg 15 күн бұрын
the channeling of Johnny Carson was a golden moment.
@karenkieffer3684
@karenkieffer3684 15 күн бұрын
Sad thing is the younger viewers probably did not get it ... right over their heads!
@trappedkitty5335
@trappedkitty5335 15 күн бұрын
@@karenkieffer3684 I'm nearly 52 and almost none of my same-aged friends would get that joke. On another note, Dick Van Dyke has a channel here on KZfaq and he is pretty amazing and sharp enough to best two people who are running for President on a mental aptitude test.
@danielgregory3295
@danielgregory3295 14 күн бұрын
Yes!! I loved that immensely!😊❤
@lynnhettrick7588
@lynnhettrick7588 14 күн бұрын
Love the Carson references!
@jonathanrivlin6248
@jonathanrivlin6248 13 күн бұрын
I could hear Ed laughing and Doc on the trumpet. Miss my grandparents.
@alondamontgomery3026
@alondamontgomery3026 14 күн бұрын
Johnny Carson impression was on point. Loved that.
@samuelalonso22
@samuelalonso22 7 күн бұрын
Please do not insult Carson . This fool wouldn't make a pimple on Johnny's ass
@donaldwickman1754
@donaldwickman1754 15 күн бұрын
"Light butt play" 😂
@c.m.169
@c.m.169 15 күн бұрын
Yes, they want pregnant women to wear an ankle monitor so they know where they are at all times.
@TheJeweledBird
@TheJeweledBird 15 күн бұрын
Just pregnant ones? I can see them putting monitors on all women of childbearing age.
@TheGreatAtario
@TheGreatAtario 15 күн бұрын
Blessed be the fruit, under his eye.
@juannagrant-salmon7764
@juannagrant-salmon7764 15 күн бұрын
Ever read Vox by Christina Dalcher?
@dr.g3860
@dr.g3860 15 күн бұрын
Soon technology will allow those ankle bracelets to monitor women's menstrual cycles.
@cil20002000
@cil20002000 15 күн бұрын
Pregnancy has nothing to do with this video….move along
@charlesmartin1121
@charlesmartin1121 15 күн бұрын
Let sleeping Don's lie, or he will awake and continue to lie.
@aristede9954
@aristede9954 15 күн бұрын
Keep it up don't want the lying Don I want an administration to continue its current foreign policy... I am all sure the Palestinians are rooting for Biden too!! 😂😂😂
@missrose0077
@missrose0077 15 күн бұрын
Donald isn't sleeping. He's closing his eyes and pretending he's invisible.
@user-sv9nb8ky2t
@user-sv9nb8ky2t 15 күн бұрын
​@@aristede9954Darfur looking in, discovering other genocides are more popular.
@RosieRoserules
@RosieRoserules 15 күн бұрын
I bet he doesn't dream but if he did he even lies in his dreams
@bigiron8831
@bigiron8831 15 күн бұрын
​@@aristede9954 LET'S GO DARWIN.....
@LeeMaiden
@LeeMaiden 15 күн бұрын
As a Schedule 3 drug, doctors will be able to prescribe it, and insurance companies will have to pay for it.
@user-kl6ef1tn5g
@user-kl6ef1tn5g 15 күн бұрын
Under the TIME logo, it should have read “To Go To Jail!”
@MausMasher54
@MausMasher54 15 күн бұрын
I'd fall asleep in court, if I sat on the Gold Crapper and Fire out Mean Tweets, all Night....
@drtaverner
@drtaverner 15 күн бұрын
We've had legal Cannabis for a number of years now. It's weird that the US is still lagging behind.
@Susweca5569
@Susweca5569 15 күн бұрын
I live in Washington State where it's recreational legal. As long as you're twenty one, you can buy anything you want, as much as you want, whenever you want. One local rural store near me even has a delivery service so you don't have to break the law by driving under the influence. They'll bring your order right to your door.
@Pryexel
@Pryexel 15 күн бұрын
The US is behind on a lot of things.
@bovinityleak2066
@bovinityleak2066 15 күн бұрын
No it is not. Backwards country.
@helenwheels3341
@helenwheels3341 15 күн бұрын
We lag on everything
@NigelMacDonald-mt9wn
@NigelMacDonald-mt9wn 15 күн бұрын
@@Susweca5569 That's cool. Crazy every state isn't like that.
@TheMrAshley2010
@TheMrAshley2010 15 күн бұрын
I instantly thought of Carson when the 'butt play' joke bombed. And then, a couple of jokes later, Stephen DELIVERED a Carson imitation!!!
@ericwatts-et2nl
@ericwatts-et2nl 15 күн бұрын
The writers deserve a raise, you and they are killin' it. Also - give yourself a raise.
@richiejohnson
@richiejohnson 15 күн бұрын
I love the way Steven always puts his pantomime pen and phone away after using it. I also love it when he slips into Johnny Carson mode!
@muddgrub4402
@muddgrub4402 15 күн бұрын
GREAT Johnny Carson!
@pithicus52
@pithicus52 15 күн бұрын
I wonder how many people recognized that he was doing Carson.
@amyreynolds3619
@amyreynolds3619 15 күн бұрын
Love the Johnny Carson impression Stephen Colbert!
@grnddesign
@grnddesign 15 күн бұрын
Your writers are amazing & your delivery fantastic!! Thank you Stephen for all your great work
@warryck5909
@warryck5909 15 күн бұрын
I was literally sparking up a bowl as Stephen asked 'Who likes weed?'.
@ja-mez5102
@ja-mez5102 15 күн бұрын
lol can't sleep either?
@whyamihereweirdo9912
@whyamihereweirdo9912 15 күн бұрын
I just put my pipe down from smoking a bowl 🤣😂🤣
@zerimar584
@zerimar584 15 күн бұрын
same here, could not "not" do it
@tweex1
@tweex1 15 күн бұрын
All of your dudes' parents are being phoned.
@MK-su6eg
@MK-su6eg 15 күн бұрын
Weed and Late night , is automatic! Aloha from Hawaii! Yes I'm stoned!
@margo3367
@margo3367 15 күн бұрын
I used to say, the media reports on every time Trump farts. Never thought I’d be literally correct.
@t.tenney3470
@t.tenney3470 15 күн бұрын
Well ......... He's not farting.
@jpdemer5
@jpdemer5 15 күн бұрын
@@t.tenney3470 And you know this... how?
@carochio8639
@carochio8639 15 күн бұрын
@@t.tenney3470 is it Diarrhea?
@DonariaRegia
@DonariaRegia 15 күн бұрын
Since television is paid for by advertisers, and we fund those companies, why don't we eliminate the middleman and directly fund television through donations demanding one a day a week free from Trump. Just have every channel stifle for one lousy day. It would be twenty-four ours of bliss to the eyes and ears.
@jpdemer5
@jpdemer5 15 күн бұрын
@@t.tenney3470 And you know this . . . how?
@cjdingojames3715
@cjdingojames3715 15 күн бұрын
the homage to Carson & Ed hilarious ●
@kelkabot
@kelkabot 14 күн бұрын
I remember when older folks used to laugh about comedians I didn’t know anything about when I was a kid, like Jack Benny or Milton Berle. Now when I talk about Johnny Carson, it’s my turn to get the blank looks from youngsters. So I’m grateful to Colbert for that tip of the hat to Carson!
@distressor6770
@distressor6770 15 күн бұрын
They also need to revisit the sentences of all the people put in prison for ridiculous amounts of time for possession of cannabis
@NewMessage
@NewMessage 15 күн бұрын
Sadly, there's a whole segment of the audience who has no clue who Johnny, Ed, and Doc even are.
@cindymorose6673
@cindymorose6673 15 күн бұрын
That’s what I was thinking. We’re old. 😂
@NewMessage
@NewMessage 15 күн бұрын
@@cindymorose6673 You are correct, Sir...
@jasonleland6978
@jasonleland6978 15 күн бұрын
@@NewMessage I laughed so hard. The way he did the little bounce on his toes when he hit the "butt". It was perfect. He's probably the last guy working late night who'll acknowledge the debt they all owe to Johnny. Kimmel is simply too focused on Letterman (which is fine because Dave was amazing) and Fallon and Meyers are too young.
@NexuJin
@NexuJin 15 күн бұрын
@@cindymorose6673 As an European watcher. I didn't get that joke either.
@stevebistrup8258
@stevebistrup8258 15 күн бұрын
Carnac the Magnificent says you are correct.
@molittr
@molittr 11 күн бұрын
Thank you for the Johnny call back!
@nanishkamassa4803
@nanishkamassa4803 15 күн бұрын
😂😂😂 I peed my 👖 “We know you are tight with bad and stupid, they are your sons” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@tylerkochman1007
@tylerkochman1007 15 күн бұрын
When they talk about rescheduling marijuana, do they mean pushing 4:20 to a later hour?
@nannigoat3
@nannigoat3 15 күн бұрын
🤣
@elizabethcarrington5819
@elizabethcarrington5819 15 күн бұрын
Yep. He ain’t right in the head. lol.
@superstrongr
@superstrongr 15 күн бұрын
😂
@BabbittdaWabbitt
@BabbittdaWabbitt 15 күн бұрын
Har har har !
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 15 күн бұрын
"Nuggets on a string" is FAR more tame than the actual solution. The lawyers showed Trump videos of himself making speeches on rallies. To recap: Trump only stayed awake to watch videos OF HIMSELF! THAT IS MENTAL PATIENT BEHAVIOR!!
@eternyti
@eternyti 15 күн бұрын
That, my friend, is grade-A Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
@TrickOrRetreat
@TrickOrRetreat 15 күн бұрын
Indeed 🤢
@paulj8539
@paulj8539 15 күн бұрын
Cattle prod, given to the jury foreperson... it's the humane way.
@Michele_PoeTreeWitch
@Michele_PoeTreeWitch 15 күн бұрын
Nuggets on a string sounds like a song
@joshh535
@joshh535 15 күн бұрын
Arguably, “typing in all caps because something you saw on the internet sent you into a rage” is also “mental patient behavior”…
@IrvinCascade
@IrvinCascade 9 күн бұрын
Stephen is WAY too excited about "light butt play." And I LOVE it
@warriorwarrior4958
@warriorwarrior4958 15 күн бұрын
Why hasn't anyone started calling him Dozing Don.😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
@teagueskye0959
@teagueskye0959 15 күн бұрын
It may be most useful for our veterans!
@hariseldon2450
@hariseldon2450 15 күн бұрын
I'm waiting for Stormy to testify. This is going to be an epic fight. Sleepy Mushroom man vs Stormy Daniels.
@NexuJin
@NexuJin 15 күн бұрын
flaccid fight
@psycophonic
@psycophonic 14 күн бұрын
I'm thinking the "rug shampoo" would come in handy....😂
@anthoneylivingston8325
@anthoneylivingston8325 15 күн бұрын
You killed it stephen
@ejyounggun08
@ejyounggun08 15 күн бұрын
Hey now! Weed isn't #1 on my schedule. I wake up, take care of my dogs THEN I smoke a blunt. It's #2. 😊
@HowardDaniels-uw8tj
@HowardDaniels-uw8tj 15 күн бұрын
Modified wake and bake
@NigelMacDonald-mt9wn
@NigelMacDonald-mt9wn 15 күн бұрын
I can tell just from your comment that you would be a better President than Joe or Don.
@bunzeebear2973
@bunzeebear2973 15 күн бұрын
A brownie would have to be classed as a #2
@MrTomHill
@MrTomHill 15 күн бұрын
That Trump man isn't right.
@barbarasiders288
@barbarasiders288 15 күн бұрын
He ain't right what mama said
@divinewon73
@divinewon73 15 күн бұрын
⁠​​⁠ 🛑Merr-Merr Gar-Gar is a member of the Fed Errol ist Society which works with the Heritic found ation and provided the project 2025, 920 page document to obliterate the federal government... these are the same organizations that provided Roberts and the rest.☣️ connecting the dots?🤔
@divinewon73
@divinewon73 15 күн бұрын
⁠​​⁠ 🛑Merr-Merr Gar-Gar is a member of the Fed Errol ist Society which works with the Heretic found ation and provided the project 2025, 920-page document to obliterate the federal government... these are the same organizations that provided Roberts and the rest.☣️ connecting the dots?🤔
@divinewon73
@divinewon73 15 күн бұрын
⁠​​⁠ 🛑Merr-Merr Gar-Gar is a member of the Fed Errol ist Society which works with the Heritic found ation and provided the project 2025, 920 page document to obliterate the federal government... these are the same organizations that provided Roberts and the rest.☣️ connecting the dots?🤔
@divinewon73
@divinewon73 15 күн бұрын
⁠​​⁠ 🛑Merr-Merr Gar-Gar is a member of the Fed Errol ist Society which works with the Heritic found ation and provided the project 2025, 920 page document to obliterate the federal government... these are the same organizations that provided Roberts and the rest.☣️ connecting the dots?🤔
@margaretweber50
@margaretweber50 15 күн бұрын
Jimmy Kimmel says "court is closed on Wednesdays to air it out". 😉
@dk9619
@dk9619 13 күн бұрын
Loved the Johnny Carson moment!
@abelincoln3261
@abelincoln3261 15 күн бұрын
Why not just legalize it 100% .. it's ridiculous that people are in prison in jail on probation.. have lost jobs have been booted from the military... it's just stupid plain stupid. It's pot not tnt or poison.
@DSAK55
@DSAK55 15 күн бұрын
why not go out and vote in the Congress you want
@cogline
@cogline 15 күн бұрын
They gave me an OTH discharge for just admitting to smoking pot
@alalalala57
@alalalala57 15 күн бұрын
​@@DSAK55 Bahahaha lmao.
@Idlewyld
@Idlewyld 15 күн бұрын
​@@DSAK55 I hope you're not naive enough to think normal people can afford congressmen.
@edwardblair4096
@edwardblair4096 15 күн бұрын
I'm pretty sure that change was all that was available for him to do. My guess is that there is a law passed in the late 60s or early 70s that requires marijuana to be classified as a dangerous drug. The only option under the current law is to reduce the classification to the lowest level in that system. Congress would need to pass a new law to reduce it down to the level of an "ordinary" prescription drug or to regulate it at the same level as alcohol or tobacco.
@jamesswanson4391
@jamesswanson4391 15 күн бұрын
The Johnny Carson was beautiful
@joefunsmith
@joefunsmith 15 күн бұрын
10% of audience: Good one. 20% of audience: Johnny who?70% of audience: You mean Johnny Cochrane?
@TheGreatAtario
@TheGreatAtario 15 күн бұрын
Weird, wild stuff. Did not know that.
@Susweca5569
@Susweca5569 15 күн бұрын
​@@joefunsmith Who's Johnny Cochrane? 🤣
@biffy7
@biffy7 15 күн бұрын
Yay for the reference to: Johnny Carson, Ed McMahon,and Doc Severinsen
@4brigger
@4brigger 15 күн бұрын
I say to myself: "Now Steve, you missed an opportunity for 'WHALE!'"
@smoothrocky1847
@smoothrocky1847 15 күн бұрын
He subverted the expectation
@neilsolo
@neilsolo 15 күн бұрын
Fantastic Carson Impression!!
@Hattrick00
@Hattrick00 13 күн бұрын
Oh love the Carson bit!
@brianwilner5546
@brianwilner5546 15 күн бұрын
Stephen .. you are phenomenal and only keep getting better!
@WillLanigan
@WillLanigan 15 күн бұрын
Love the Johnny Carson impression at 8:30 🫡
@MrAlexandermartis
@MrAlexandermartis 15 күн бұрын
Yeah, and Trump is breaking the gas ceiling.
@jeremiahjohnson7515
@jeremiahjohnson7515 15 күн бұрын
bot... no reasoning. dont fall for it...
@devak45167
@devak45167 15 күн бұрын
😂 zing!
@brebeaa
@brebeaa 15 күн бұрын
Got ‘em! 😂
@jeffreyenglish1815
@jeffreyenglish1815 15 күн бұрын
Speed causes incontinence and flatulence. Trump is a speed freak that wants to criminalize marijuana and execute drug dealers. Another Trump conundrum.
@Bugdriver49
@Bugdriver49 15 күн бұрын
@@jeremiahjohnson7515 Great pun!!!
@papatroll9545
@papatroll9545 14 күн бұрын
Haven't laughed this hard in years. Absolutely killed it. Masterful improv!
@calumproctor981
@calumproctor981 15 күн бұрын
I've now got 'Nuggets on a String' playing in Jim Morrison's voice to the tune of 'Riders on the Storm'.
@TheloniousCube
@TheloniousCube 15 күн бұрын
We need more Carson impressions!!
@Nebris
@Nebris 15 күн бұрын
You saw that too. lol
@rybear5035
@rybear5035 15 күн бұрын
Yeah! I saw that...i was looking for the Carson comment! Ty
@davidlundquist1979
@davidlundquist1979 15 күн бұрын
Yessir!
@BabbittdaWabbitt
@BabbittdaWabbitt 15 күн бұрын
Too funny, we’re showing our age.
@MichaelOConnell-iw4bn
@MichaelOConnell-iw4bn 15 күн бұрын
You are correct, sir!
@lisandroesterga1858
@lisandroesterga1858 15 күн бұрын
Apparently 'treason' has also been demoted as a crime, because the insurrectionists weren't indicted.
@barbarashea1975
@barbarashea1975 15 күн бұрын
Great comment.
@JJLom777
@JJLom777 15 күн бұрын
Right?!
@BarbaraCarrier-ld9sr
@BarbaraCarrier-ld9sr 15 күн бұрын
Check your facts. About 1,186 J6 defendants have been charged with entering or remaining in a restricted federal building. Some were sentenced to 4 years. Vote BLUE to save our democracy. Democracy is the only thing on the ballot. Vote BLUE for local, state & national elections.
@cyberGEK
@cyberGEK 15 күн бұрын
8:34 Here’s Johnny!!! 😂😂🔥🔥🔥
@catherinerheaume8522
@catherinerheaume8522 15 күн бұрын
It’s amazing that the whole world is seeing DT’s mental and physical (non) performance in real time daily. Still keeping a straight face about him as THE candidate.
@roserose8283
@roserose8283 15 күн бұрын
Perfect Johnny Carson! Fantastic!! 🏆
@MorganFleurDeLys
@MorganFleurDeLys 15 күн бұрын
Great fun watching you do Johnny Carson impersonations!
@emmasmom60
@emmasmom60 15 күн бұрын
Maybe his lawyers should try a technique from looking after confused patients - give him a bunch of washcloths to fold. Good Carson.
@courtneyswazey7013
@courtneyswazey7013 15 күн бұрын
Long live the memory of Johnny Carson. Late night GOAT!
@adamlayneandersen
@adamlayneandersen 15 күн бұрын
The phrase “nuggets on a string” will NEVER leave me. Thank god. I love you @stephenathome see you in Folly
@Mojothreepwood
@Mojothreepwood 15 күн бұрын
Louis Cato and the LS band are getting superb with the audio cues of Stephens mimes lol
@Nickakanugboy
@Nickakanugboy 10 күн бұрын
4:20 nice, the pp drawing is amazing. First the head and shaft. Then the nutz then the spooge then the hairs. Great pantomime steve.
@lindaboutilier238
@lindaboutilier238 15 күн бұрын
As a Canadian, I think it's about time
@cherylmccloud8709
@cherylmccloud8709 15 күн бұрын
👨‍👩‍👧‍👦👫🎶"Diddle Diddle Trumpling/Fred's son Don/Sleeps in Court with his diaper on!"🎶
@threefeetofair758
@threefeetofair758 15 күн бұрын
Missed a cofveve joke on word search.
@singhjobim9719
@singhjobim9719 15 күн бұрын
Great monologue-kudos to the writers!
@lisab9541
@lisab9541 14 күн бұрын
This was one of the funniest monologues I've ever seen on any late night shows. 😂
@Mplsgurl
@Mplsgurl 15 күн бұрын
When do we start panicking people??? He’s insane! 💙
@annemettefrederiksen7751
@annemettefrederiksen7751 15 күн бұрын
Oh ,dont worry, I panicked before 2016 's election and im not even american...And im on going for round 2 , ready ro drink with Stephen again to maintain a slimmer of sanity
@tammyjantzen9004
@tammyjantzen9004 15 күн бұрын
Some of us have been trying to panic people since Trump ran the first time.
@Aura-Of-Syrinx
@Aura-Of-Syrinx 15 күн бұрын
It should have been DEclassified .-.
@Dan-Simms
@Dan-Simms 15 күн бұрын
The big thing about it not being a schedule 1 drug is that now it can be tested and researched way more easily. This should have been done decades ago, it should never have been listed as a schedule 1 to begin with in the first place.
@ismith275
@ismith275 15 күн бұрын
Love the reference to Johnny Carson! 👍
@trevorxlindeman1798
@trevorxlindeman1798 15 күн бұрын
Trump’s lawyers should talk to the folks who served Trump in the White House to see what they did to keep him awake. I have heard that he had a regimen of uppers prescribed to him by the pillman Ronnie Jackson.
@RasAlHaq
@RasAlHaq 14 күн бұрын
Briefings had to mention his name frequently, include plenty of pictures, and be very brief.
@Mortthemoose
@Mortthemoose 8 күн бұрын
​@@RasAlHaq yep.... I've not read much about it, but what I HAVE read WAS shocking! Like trying to keep the attention of a 3 year old!!
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