Cleanance: a combination of clean and enhance. This will enhance your audiovisual experience by cleaning your lasers!

For some reason it evokes a very specific setting of a sweet elderly couple sitting infront of their TV enjoying the cute music and what they think is effective cleanancing. Placebo is strong, and in such a case it'd feel almost cruel being honest and telling them it's all a lot of horsecrap. There are worse crimes in the world, I'd say.

Funny, the 1kHz test tone was actually 1,060Hz... but I wouldn't have expected anything less from this awesome disc!

After having watched through all of this, I now feel thoroughly cleaned. The cleanance is unfathomable!

The only item missing from that packaging mayhem is the classic AS SEEN ON TV.

I worked in a TV/VCR repair shop many years ago... we used an excellent solvent called TF that contained "trichlor." It worked wonders and evaporated cleanly leaving no residue. Attacking the ozone layer was an added bonus. I mean hazard! Yes, definitely a hazard. It would eventually evaporate from even the mostly tightly sealed container.

I love the way at 17:57 there's a change in exposure and possibly also white balance - just what you expect from a calibration tool lol

Knowing KZfaq, someone WILL make a 10 hour loop of the animation at 12:29.

I wouldn't discount that the cleaning fluid does (or did when originally packed) have freon in it. About 10 years ago, they busted a Chinese foam factory that was still using cfcs to blow their foam. The Chinese government had to be reminded diplomatically of their obligations to stop that.

6:20 Trichlorotrifluoroethane is a banned solvent often used for dry cleaning. It’s an ozone-depleting CFC once known as Freon 113.

I remember seeing these sort of packages all over the place 10-15 years ago at flea markets, yard sales, and discount stores. Never tried one and now I'm glad I didn't!

"Super strong" ... perfect for older Pioneer CD players where the adhesive holding the lens in place fails, so you can knock it off right away! Cleanance, I suppose, could be a form of financing this cleaning disc, if you can't afford it. If that package was ever stored in a hot environment and there really was any Freon in that bottle of cleaning solution, the pressure could have become greater than what the container could stand.

Thanks! My phone is now super clean 👌

Wow. I can't thank you enough for posting this. After watching this video, not only is my CD-ROM working better than it ever has, but my hard drive seems to be working better, and my SSD no longer makes seeking noises now that I've started listening for them. I'm going to play this on every PC I have, and recommend it to others so we can all have the cleanance we need on our optical, magnetic, and SSD drives. I can't wait to watch the next Technology Connections video with my newly cleaned laptop!

Wow, I was... not prepared for that video. One known case of cleaning the lens helping I know of was with the Nintendo Wii; once the console got a couple dual layer DVD games, some people apparently had issues reading them. Nintendo said it was due to dirty lenses and released special kits to fix the issue, which apparently did help, so... what d'you know.

Cleanance = Clean + Clearance It's the minimum amount of cleanliness one must have to be officially declared clean

I wouldn't even complain about how it doesn't actually work, the video it comes with is a work of art! also, man the speaker configuration has some amazing bass! With the quality of everything else, I wouldn't be surprised if that bottle of cleaning fluid was packaged empty lol.

I remember having a cheap cleaning CD with all that exact same video on it many years ago, I also remember it having a bunch of karaoke clips of Chinese kids singing nursery rhymes, which was pretty funny. I seem to recall my one did have the audio CD tracks on it as well though.

Cleanance: The state in which something is made _clean_ via _clearance_ of dirt or dust particles. "I can see cleanance now, the dust is gone!" There's something ridiculously nostalgic about cleaning discs like this. Everything from the gimmicky packaging to the early 3D animations on the disc just screams out '90s-era retro tech.

I think 'Cleanance' is what the manufacturer feels after they manage to sell an entire warehouse full of these things. The owner overlooks an empty warehouse and inhales deeply... "Ah, cleanance."

The cleaning video is peak 90s. SOLID. So much A E S T H E T I C

14:01 man this took me back, i remember my dad using a VHS head cleaner back then and it had this exact testing video on it while cleaning. Thank you so much for the surprise nostalgia, I'm hoping you upload the whole thing as a separate video on your other channel.

I almost bought one of these at a thrift store yesterday, but I touched the cleaning pad and the glue just fell off. Something to be aware of when buying these, if you choose to do so. There's no guarantee that it won't just fall apart in your drive, forcing you to open it up, and you're likely to get new old stock when buying stuff like this. I just don't like the idea of this kind of thing in my disc drives.

Holy cow, this mighty video just turned my TN screen into Oled! So many cleanance! I enjoy!

I don't even need cheese on my pizza anymore since the cleaning video was cheesy enough.

When watching stuff like this reviewed, the main concern is whether it will be terrible enough... and this certainly delivers! These things certainly bring me back to that video from years ago "Dodgy and dubious electronics in the Heartland America catalog", which is one you definitely don't want to miss.

Cleaning lenses with isopropyl alcohol and a q-tip has worked multiple times for me (recently with a Dreamcast). Just like floppy drives and tape heads, in my experience, it’s usually due to smoking. Definitely wouldn’t risk using one of these disks, though!

What started as a clip about some dodgy lens cleaner ended up as a great authentic piece of vaporwave video.

I will say, I opened up an IDE CD-ROM a few weeks ago and fixed it by cleaning the laser with isopropyl... it would read CDs but not ones with the tiniest scratches on them. Also 1:52, the Philips Compact Cassette logo... that got me lol

A few years back, I bought a 'broken' PS2 slim for 15$. I was expecting a bot of a project. I ended up cleaning the lens, and it started reading discs again!

I can feel the cleanance coming through my screen!

The bird on the TV screen looks like one of the ViewSonic toucans with his beak sewn shut.

I love the video clips they used. Gave me liminal feelings - especially the washed out footage of people running into the sea at the beach, and the GREEN TEST that showed mainly pink flowers. I love the weird red lipstick 💄 video animation

(9:03) That reminds me of when my parents had a lot of bootleg videos that were all on VCD, some even had the DVD-Video logo on it when they were really formatted as VCD 2.0, or even VCD 1.1! Most of the bootleg discs seemed to have been created from VHS tapes, though. Also, that video rip reminds me of a "Media Cache" DVD lens cleaner I still have and took from my parents when they stopped having a DVD player.

Just imagine the sly grin on the face of the person who put those logos on the package just laughing at their own bull.

Congratulations! Your TV now shows cleanance again

6:48 I had a "Easy listening/sleep music" CD that had one of those "cleaning pads" on it

For some stupid reason I like collecting these... I recently bought one it was on a DVD disc which was strange...then I noticed it had a Korean drama on it 😂 I tried to make a video on it but copyright claims wouldn't let me....

Your selection of bootleg VCDs just screams 2000s memories for me... the flea markets of Baclaran and Quiapo (yes, I'm from the Philippines) come to mind.

Repaired electronics for years. A recurring problem with laser lenses, believe it or not, were roach infested units. Roach remnants would get embedded on the lens. Don't ask about washers, dryers and microwaves. lol. Once repaired a cassete deck that "Chattered" in FF and RW, roach parts embedded in the gear teeth.

Cleanance - a mix of 'cleaning' and 'clearance'. Much like a clearance sale at a store, 'cleanance' is the removal of those last little bits of dirt that other products couldn't get rid of.

I like how this makes those "Trisonic" brand items found at no-name dollar stores and other such places look high quality and legitimate by comparison.

It's always fun reading the hilarious Chinese to English mistranslations even though I can't speak of word of Mandarin, so my Mandarin would be far worse than their English. One would think the company would hire someone fluent in both Mandarin and English. Then there are some hilarious product names. I bought a region-free DVD player from a company called Lonpoo (sounds like "lawn poo") and another one by Zard zoop. Who thinks of these names? Hahahaha! :)

I got the sense that there was a lot of time just needing to be filled up (on their VCD). I can somewhat understand the color bars and the test pattern, and perhaps a picture of multicolored fruits. But what was with the cloned lipstick 💄 , the strange faded blue sky and blue green underwater scenes, and dwelling so much on green. I will hand it to them on the nifty 3D countdown with the morphing numbers, and the multicolored tunnel going all directions. Some of the older 3D computer graphics makes me wax nostalgic! Admittedly I would’ve thought a lot of that content was cool. Heck I still do. But yea not really that super of a cleaning technology there. I had a regular one with just CD audio and it did nothing to help.

It's spring. Time to cleanance the car.

I propose that cleanance, similar to the word luminance, is the value used to describe how much "Image Enhancement" a TV applies to an analog video signal.

I remembered this generic footage sequence of this VCD cleaner disc. In my childhood I see a lots of this. They was a little bit of scam, because they don't need to be used. But the footage gaves me a little bit of nostalgia. I has two generic VCD lens cleaner discs: one with exactly equal footage compairing woth your and another with similar footage crazy sequence. Thanks for the video rip. Greetings from Brazil!

I enjoyed the music played with the test footage. The music is reminiscent of early 90’s Japanese RPGs like Lunar: The Silver Star on the SegaCD.

I think we can all agree this is a genuine product because toucans are discerning consumers.

Cleanance: video cleaners found in the dept store clearance aisle.

Can you perhaps upload the full rip on a seperate site? Or a download? I am intrigued to see the stock footage shown.

The test videos on the cleaning disc has some late 80s - early 90s aesthetic to it. I imagine them being used in a vaporwave music video. I also think that the music in those videos are perfect samples for vaporwave.

13:47 and onwards, that's the content I used to see on a VHS head cleaner my family used to own years ago 😂

14:06 I listen to this jingle only in Japanese trains!

The quality of cleanance after using this product. Made me feel super terrific happy. 😎👍

I have to admit that I actually quite enjoyed this video. The music was cheap but not cheesy and enjoyable to listen to and the overall picture quality of this Video CD was above aberage ( there are most certainly worse looking VCDs out there ). Sound quality appears to be very good with good dynamics. How did you capture this Video CD ? I used to live in Hong Kong for some time fiveteen years ago so VCD was still a big thing back then. Sure the quality was worse than DVD but there was a very good catalogue of legal titles in Hong Kong at that time from Anime to Hong Kong classics to Hollywood movies. I have fond memories of this format.

I don’t know, I bought a CD player from goodwill (mfd 1989) and it didn’t read discs at all. I cleaned the laser with alcohol several times and it actually plays mostly fine now. It still skips around a little, but for a 10 dollar piece of vintage mid range audio equipment, it’s great.

I had a similar lens cleaning disc that also had 10 VideoCD karaoke tracks at the end after the cleaning portion

I bought these cleaning VCDs for their bottle of isopropyl alcohol. Usually still full of them. Looks like some of the graphics were recycled in other cleaning disc brands, e.g. the countdown sequence. On a side note, I have yet to find an audio CD variant of these cleaning discs. Would love to own one.

I used to work for Kimpaku back when this came out. We also sold anti-vibration pads for CRT monitors and a RAM expansion for one of the old CASIO watches. It got shut down after some kid's head exploded from using one of our headphone amps which was wired wrong.

That video track reminded me of that Beyond the Mind's Eye tape they used to play in Radio Shack stores, but a low rent version.

If cleanliness is striving to keep clean and tidy, cleanance must be the state that is achieved by it. I also think it should be pronounced [klĕn′əns] like the clean in cleanliness -ance in clearance.

I guess a statement like : "Dust in your laser pickup lens will affect reading signal and also create a blur image" made sense to people at the early days of digital media. It makes sense if all you know are VCRs, where that is the case... in reality, Digital is all or nothing, the image quality won't degrade at all, you either see it or you dont. It would be more like reading errors, like skipping and freezing.

Those things can actually destroy a drive, I'm sure that the laser lense (servo lense) is the intended item to be cleaned sense the laser is not even remotely close the the brushes that are spinning like a thousand miles an hour. Those types of discs can POTENTIALLY PERMANENTLY DESTROY the player no matter the type. DO NOT use those cleaning discs.

6:36 - I wonder if Kimpaku made LaserDisc cleaners too. That would be extra gimmicky and hilarious! Brushes attached to the underside of a 12" optical disc spinning up to 600RPM for a standard LD, and up to 2470RPM for a Hi-Vision MUSE disc! Do you think they also made a dual sided LaserDisc cleaner for dual sided players???💿💽 WOW 🤯 Now... where's my optical demagnetizer and disc rotation stabilizer for my Blu-ray player?... Kimpaku? 🤣

I had a similar CD/DVD lens cleaner made by Memorex. I used it to fix the DVD recorder and the Nintendo Wii, because they’re slot loading! I really hate slot loading disc drives, because they’re harder to clean!

11:17 wow that music!

I could see the color test really helping out back when we all used older televisions

Cleanance- when you sell a product that’s supposed to be for cleaning on what appears to be clearance, but all that’s getting cleaned out is your wallet.

This is probably the disc that North Korean state television plays every day before the news comes on.

I could have sworn I've heard that music before. Reminds me of 90s Anime and video game music... I got the feeling some of the music came from a Tycoon game.

Wow. I’m watching this video now and my DVD burner is 100 percent clean. Amazing :D

My house was full of ghosts, but thanks to this, now it's clean. I mean, now it's cleanance.

This is a true example of vaporware.

I think parts if not all of the disc were excepted from a LaserDisc lens cleaner distributed by Geneva. Someone else uploaded footage of it here: kzfaq.info/get/bejne/o9Zio6aSy7rNpnk.html *EDIT:* I found more footage of the LD lens cleaner. It seems the Japanese text was edited out. kzfaq.info/get/bejne/mZuWl8WE1pbXgKc.html

All jokes aside, an actual disc with test patterns on it would be useful. I was looking for some stuff to test out my audio system the other day, and surprisingly there aren't that many disks to do that - I eventually found a Dolby Atmos tester which was good enough to give my 5.1 system a good test. Really aren't that many things now though to just buy as a calibration disk. Thanks for sharing, I didn't think I'd enjoy a cheap (sorta naff) lens cleaner as much as I did, although that's why I like your channel. :)

Only a few minutes in, but this is hilarious! I love how you couldn't help but chuckle as well.

Found other Kimpaku products when I looked it up online. One includes a VHS head cleaner included with the CD.

The music on that laser cleaner disc, it is so, soooooooo good. I love old 80s and 90s synth music like this. Thanks so much for sharing.

If your name is Nancy and people abbreviate your name to Nance and you run a cleaning company, then CleaNance is the trademarked name of your business!

Just watching your video provided great Cleanance again!

Placing a drop of the solution on the tongue enhances the process of cleanance for 12 full hours, man

they used to sell inhalant drugs like poppers as “vcr head cleaner” replete with bogus cleaning accessories to appear legitimate. and 5 years ago i ordered a thieno-benzodiazepine drug (think xanax, but highly euphoric as well) from a clearnet website under the ruse that it was some sort of disc cleaner. it wasn’t, and the website made clear what it was really for. i wonder if this is similar.

Cleanance: noun, the state or result of the act of achieving total cleanliness in a medium or area

I'm disappointed by the color test, after the red test I was fully expecting to see green and blue lipsticks.

Cleanance. They combined clean and maintenance

They *_really_* pulled out all the stops when it came to that packaging and the corresponding video. It looks like something right out of a sketchy dollar store. And maybe I’m missing something but what’s with the word solid on all the video calibration for authentic natural color reproduction stock footage? I’ve actually been looking to buy a cleaning disc for the CD player in my car for awhile now, since I can’t readily dissemble it and clean it using the tried and true isopropyl alcohol and q tips method. However, I’m beginning to lean more toward the mechanism being the culprit, since it only struggles playing CDs when it gets to the last track. Maybe I should track down one of these to get cleanance again. What’s the worst that can happen?

I've found that CD lens cleaners are better suited to maintain a clean lens. Whenever I have a CD player that will not read a disc I always have to manually clean the lens with high % isopropyl alcohol and a q-tip. BTW, I always enjoy your videos. I came across your channel several years ago when I was having trouble with my Technics turntable cue lever not allowing the tone arm to drop when released. Thanks to your step by step video, I was able to disassemble, clean and lubricate the cueing dampener which fixed my turntable problem.

Cleanance is next to Godnance!

You reading the instructions had me in stitches.

The cover of this is a work of art. I did quick research of that substance and found this: What is trichlorotrifluoroethane used for? Trichlorotrifluoroethane is a clear, colorless liquid with an ether-like odor. It was banned (as you mention) from use as a chlorofluorocarbon for its ozone-layer destroying properties. Trichlorotrifluoroethane was primarily used as a dry cleaning solvent. It was also used as a refrigerant.

Cleanance: Creating a CLEAN picture vis the CLEARANCE of dust particles on the laser lens. :)

i love the idea that all of this is to show that the video quality works but CDs just shut off when their disc dont work

Yup, it really was possible to combine Video CD and Audio CD on one disc. I had a CD single of Gigi D'Agostino's "The Riddle" (the one with the green cover artwork) back in 2000 and it would only play the VideoCD track of the musicvideo in my Philips DVD710 DVD player and nothing else on the disc. While my normal CD player would only recognize the audio tracks. I think it was done as Mixed Mode CD. I found that pretty cool back then.

Disc lens cleaners are a waste of time and potentially cause more damage than they fix. I've fixed a few CD players where the automatic covers over the lasers have been damaged by CD cleaning discs. In my opinion and experience the best way to clean a laser is with a cotton bud and a dab of isopropyl alcohol (99% or better) moving in circular motions. Some say the alcohol will damage the plastic, but I've found that not to be true as it's a tiny amount and it dries in seconds. The method has revived a number of dead players where laser replacements weren't available.

I can feel the cleanance through my soul

12:29 Very trippy, this reminds me of a water park slide.

I can't say how much I love this video enough

I really want that entire video, it gives me serious 90's chill vibes.

I had one of those CDs at my home. I used to watch it all the time when I was a kid.