Thanks for watching. If this resonates with you, I would love to hear about it in the comments x

Thank you so much for watching and listening. I would love to hear your feedback and experiences in the comments x

I have almost listened to every one of your episodes on Spotify. That's a lot of listening. We all have healing to do, and it's so good to understand yourself and then try to improve. Understsnding and effective communication rock. Your podcasts have been so good for me, so helpful. Thank you so much.

Awesome stuff!

❤

Thank you so much for all of your support. As always, I would love to hear your thoughts and experience in the comments below x

This was very eye opening. I have always known that I struggled with receiving , because I feel like i am not worthy of any help, love, and even pleasure.

These are so specific to what I have got going on right now.. do you have a live stream on my relationship? Haha crazy, thanks for the video really helps!

A lot of people with adult ADHD struggle with break ups

Do you have a similar video on how to support an anxious partner?

Thank you for this. Kindly consider doing a video on limerence.

Excuse the video quality in this episode, an unknown recording error which we haven't been able to resolve. Feel free to leave a comment if this topic resonates with you x

Thank you so much for watching. I would love to hear you share your experience with receiving in the comments x

Whoa. I just learned so much. Thank you for this conversation.

This is very helpful!

I know how it goes for me. Today on my way to work I called my gf (at the time) and told her that out of respect for myself I had to lay down boundaries around being stonewalled. She stone walked me and hung up soon after. Later that evening I did call it off and take my belongings but as an anxiously attached person. The moment I got ignored again and then locked out.. well that was the moment my abandonment trauma kicked in and I felt triggered and pleaded. It was an ugly site. Really I don’t think it could’ve gone worse, but sometimes we don’t have the luxury of being compassionate with others if for whatever reasons they can’t communicate with us.

Thank you so much for sharing, just watched part 1 and i immediately felt like you were caring, compassionate, validating but also giving specific tips. <3

This is an amazing video, it should have SO many more views. Thank you for sharing :)

I'm all having compassion for the other side and taking some comfort in knowing that their reaction isn't entirely about you, but I'd be wary of encouraging people who are probably already significantly abandoning their boundaries to show more understanding.

I really appreciate the break down of the cause of this attachment style - allows us compassion via understanding why it may have developed x

Never interested in people who are disinterested in me

A study by the Department of Industrial Engineering and Management, Ariel University, Ariel, Israel shows that both avoidant and anxious people (insecure attachment style) display heightened neural sensitivity and increased emotional reactivity to negative feedback, reflecting their vigilance for threats. In contrast, secure people show more regulated neural responses and emotional resilience, facilitated by enhanced connectivity in key brain regions associated with effective emotion regulation. Moreover, secure people exhibit enhanced functional connectivity in key brain areas tied to emotional regulation, such as the dorsolateral and ventromedial prefrontal cortex, facilitating their ability to maintain more stable emotional responses. Source : Inon Zuckerman, Ilan Laufer, Dor Mizrahi, Attachment style, emotional feedback, and neural processing: investigating the influence of attachment on the P200 and P400 components of event-related potentials, the Department of Industrial Engineering and Management, Ariel University, Ariel, Israel

Thanks so much for your work Stephanie. I was in a long term heavily codependent relationship for 5 years. One night I had a revelatory experience which I call my "night of long sighs". This experience is in part due to your education and identifying patterns. So thank you for helping me love myself

are you talking about a million and 1 variations or just the one YOU are dealing with right now? Are you trying to give advice or are you just talking to yourself?

Thank you for your video it really helps alot. I am currently in a relationship of 9 jears and my girlfriend is pulling away and wants space and time to think. Everything i say if we speak she picks something out of it and makes it negative or says that she doesn't feel okay with it. And all i am doing is expessing my needs. I am really, as you say, running in overdrive and really trying to fix the situation. It is really stressful for me as an anxious attached person. I am trying to become more secure attached. It is not the first time this happened.

Thank you so much for watching. Feel free to share your own experiences in the comments :)

Just found your channel, Stephanie. I enjoyed listening to this conversation and will get into your other videos. You have a great, soothing speaking voice.

Thank you so much for watching this episode of On Attachment. Please feel free to share your own experiences about self-soothing x

Excellent 👍

This is a clip from a recent episode of On Attachment exploring whether or not you should get back with an ex. You can find the link in the description for the full episode. As always, would love to hear your thoughts and experiences around this topic x

Thank you so much ❤

Thanks so much for tuning into this episode. The meditation and other free resources mentioned during this episode can be found here on my website: www.stephanierigg.com/freebies Thanks again for watching x

We need Julie’s book on parenting!!!

In the first three minutes I had this OMG impression. Now I have her book on my Amazon shopping cart 😂 thank you!

So enlightening this conversation. Thanks for sharing

Loving your videos Steph - such a great isight :)

I dont know how to respect myself. ive lost 5 relationships in 5 yrs n somehow im stuck in this vicious loop of needy clingy behaviour. Help!😢

Choosing to trust instead of waiting to feel it is such a new and inspiring concept to me, thank you greatly for this tid bit of advice ♥️ i will keep it with me and i think it will be extremely helpful for me.

My boss called me a loser, when she was onstage a hypnotist show. See, the hypnotist asked the participants to explain a complex, arguable philosophy they each have, and my boss talked about dignity and diligence. She said she didn't believe hard work always make people smart or noble. She used my name as an example. She talked about how I was a slow learner at work, got things mixed up, and couldn't seem to do anything right alone. How she didn't think I could manage one-person shifts without someone to guide me. Especially after the time I set a wedding reception with black linens, not white, the official/usual color (though in my defense, black linens were used for most other events, so thus it was a natural psychological error.) She mentioned how I didn't have a driver's license, graduated from a small charter school instead of the local public high school, and still lived at home with my mom in my late twenties. And that I graduated high school at 20; I once revealed this to her and a coworker when, long story short, talking about academic norms. The hypnotist, who seemed surprised by her comments, said, "So just to clarify, you don't think he has much honor or dignity in him, even despite his work dedication? That he's a dimwit and a loser?" And to my dismay, my boss said, "Basically. I think he's basically a loser, for a guy who has a job. He's still catering after graduating from college. That might be what's best for him. He should have a career that matches his degree by now. I don't know if he will find one. He's just not very skillful or sharp." And I did graduate from college, three years ago. It just took a while to find a good career, and the hiring process is long. I know I'm a disabled late bloomer. Does that make me a loser?

I enjoyed how gentle and relatable this was. The way you describe it makes it seem very doable and really expresses how gradual this process is. I appreciate you sharing this knowledge with us. I know it’s really broadened my perspective on how I can approach myself. I hope with the practice of these techniques, I can become a healthier version of me😊 thanks again!

This was so incredibly soothing. I was being super hard on myself and I really needed to hear this. Thank you.

I am a fearful-avoidant, so I can be both clingy and avoidant.

I love your videos ❤

Excellent explanation 💯👍✅🌷

Thank you

Even though the comments below do not really attest to that, I find you such a refreshing voice in the attachment debate. Personal growth is so daunting. Expecting your partner to unilaterally change and assuming you are what you are is an understandable knee-jerk response (I have it too), but a surefire way to drive your loved one on the defense. Imagine being labeled an 'avoidant' and then being invited into a community that vilifies you at every turn and actively coaxes your counterpart just to find someone secure (as I was aghast to read in Attached). I really understand it is taxing to be around a person like me, I really do.