Hello. I can't over my perfectionsim and create my KZfaq blog. Can you help me please
@Thoughtworld19847 сағат бұрын
My daughters, 18 and 20, have been estranged for four years. I am in counseling over this and PTSD. Yes, it's very important.
@dyannnew460318 сағат бұрын
My DIL has removed everyone in my family from my son and grandchildren’s life, we were a very small family to start. I am now the target, and after a “chaperoned” but fun shopping spree for the grandkids birthday, she stood in a public parking lot and in front of my grandkids said my son (their father) does not want to hear from me, that I am neurotic, passive aggressive, and manipulating, along with all kinds of other complaints and accusations that were off the wall. I see these kids only if she is around and it’s been that way from the start. My granddaughter and I are very close and lately she has seemed fearful around me and her mother whispers to her upon seeing me. I have always respected their boundaries and have never questioned their parenting. My grandkids are 8 boy and 10 girl. The first thing she said to me when my granddaughter was born was “She’s not yours, you know” how bizarre is that? I have been silent without any requests to speak to or see them for 2 months and it has been crickets from their end. My heart is broken as I am very close to my grandkids and have never missed a first day of school, holiday, birthday, etc.. I fear my son has been sucked into all this with lies as well and I have no idea how to go forward other than to leave them alone. She can be vicious and disrespectful, and I am fearful of reaching out to my son because she monitors his calls and emails. Please advise any thoughts or help you might have.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement12 сағат бұрын
Dyanne im so sorry this has happened to you. I know this is awful for you. Its difficult for me to advise without knowing more. I think first your focus needs to be on helping yourself get through this heart break. Process your grief and do your best to get support. If your son won't talk to you willingly, there is not much you can do but be patient. I'm so sorry.
@beaglerescue528120 сағат бұрын
Move on parents, I did and am really enjoying life with my husband. It’s our time!
@MariaMartinez-gl7bgКүн бұрын
How to help my son recover from growing up with his abusive father who brainwashed him and kidnapped him for 6 years, tried to erase his mother and constantly manipulated and lies and Emeshment. Help
@youtubemariemorinestrangement18 сағат бұрын
Hi Maria, that sounds awful. how old is your son?
@mitchellrose3620Күн бұрын
Great discussion. Much thanks.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement18 сағат бұрын
Thanks for watching!
@Holden-C.2 күн бұрын
If your kid walked away... YOU screwed up.
@itsamodernmess2 күн бұрын
Will my mother admit fault to anything? Or just post a positive staged photo to her Facebook?
@Melissa07742 күн бұрын
I wonder when researchers are ever going to do a long term study to find the underlying causes of this stuff and correlations that lead up to it, so that they could someday come up with screening test that can predict when family relationships are going to go bad, years before it happens. Remember the Framingham study? It's a famous, ongoing study that started in the late 50's, where they track a bunch of people in Framingham Massachusetts, to find the causes of heart disease. It's how we know about the connection between heart disease and cholesterol and the connection between smoking and lung cancer. I wish they'd do a similar 50 or even 100+ year study where they follow a ton of families and look at every behavioral and environmental factor under the sun, that the researchers could possibly think of, in order to see what ultimately leads up to divorce, estrangement, personality disorders, and mental illnesses. Once they collect enough data, they can make screening tests they could give to people, either before they decide to get married, or when their kids or young to catch these issues while there's still time to prevent them from happening. Are there any studies like this currently happening anywhere? This really needs to be looked at as a public health issue for kids, just like things like vision screenings or having access to clean water are.
@AngelEyes-xm7el3 күн бұрын
A divorce from there dad. He could have girlfriend s but if i had a man friend that was a no no. He convinced them i cheated the whole marriage. No he cheated on me but i told the truth. I said he cheated and I regret I did that.
@happylife98253 күн бұрын
What efforts can you suggest as far with the child ?
@youtubemariemorinestrangement3 күн бұрын
You're asking about what the AC could DO?
@christianjosephbuenviaje76183 күн бұрын
Hi i've been no contact with my parent for about 4 years now, I've come to talk to them at year 2, it went good for months then, after a while it became toxic again, this time I'm willing to do longer, they never showed care for me and they are always thinking about themselves. Narcissistic, selfish and self absorbed, I am more happy now and I feel free. They were never self aware always thinking about themselves. I feel good knowing that I never get to see them anymore
@JazzyLou184 күн бұрын
My mum is married to the man who molestered me as a child. Never apologised. I’ve always been kind and loving to my mum. But now I’m 40 I just can’t live in such denial.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement2 күн бұрын
Thank you for sharing. I'm hoping you have someone helping you process this?
@GG-pz2vw4 күн бұрын
According to God’s Word, some children are just rebellious and or stubborn. Sometimes the parents don’t have to do anything wrong. Parents are NOT children’s only influence in this world. So, when they enter the school system and or affiliate with other children, a lot of the people they come in contact with have now become influential to children, whether good or bad and they develop learned behavior from other adults and or peers. Moreover, some children may just be genetically hard-headed and will become estranged from parents, because they never liked rules and laws noway. Truth is we have to keep praying for our children and leave them in God’s hands. God gave us our own minds and sometimes people are going to “choose” to do what they want to do, regardless of whether they were raised correctly or not.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement2 күн бұрын
Thank you for reaching out. The video reports the responses of adult children what they believe contributed to their wanting to distance.rsp I think that there are cases where parents are estranged and there are multiple contributors. The perspective of AC is what happened to them and the perspective of the EP is usually things that have nothing to do with them. I find this telling.
@dhannamangroo38654 күн бұрын
Very informative information thanks for sharing.
@hiddencreekgardensbethmcmi37204 күн бұрын
Unfortunately, my son became influenced by the woke movement. He cut off all contact and I have not heard from him in over 4 years. It is possible that he might never reach out to me. All I know is that he is in the state of New York.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement4 күн бұрын
Need someone to talk to? → morinholistictherapy.com/strategy
@franceducharme48045 күн бұрын
What of they d9nt say anything?
@user-vr7es2kc3r5 күн бұрын
Just give them the space. They will come back when they are ready.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement2 күн бұрын
Have they ever said anything during confrontation?
@chichimamathegreat6 күн бұрын
Look inward and see why you drove your adult child away in the first place.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement22 сағат бұрын
What do you suggest for parents who are genuinely sorry, and they have reflected but their AC won't respond?
@chichimamathegreat21 сағат бұрын
@@youtubemariemorinestrangement to keep trying. And accept the fact that they do t have to forgive you
@joeyriddle6 күн бұрын
Excuse me while I project: So your child forgave the nightmarish childhood, filled with neglect, psychological and sometimes physical abuse, an adult life riddled with anxiety and depression, difficulty forming healthy relationships, agonizing rumination and everything else that comes from never feeling safe… only to endure a present day relationship with you that continues to include constant gaslighting, devaluing comparisons to your more successful cousins or childhood friends (whose parents actually invested in their upbringing BTW), triangulation, scapegoating, button pushing for sport, smear campaigns etc etc… to finally go no or limited contact for survival and you want an international pity party? Good luck
@silvias5506 күн бұрын
There is a reason kids don't speak to parents.
@angelofknowledge93896 күн бұрын
Exactly, sometimes it's for our own protection from a lifetime of abuse.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement21 сағат бұрын
Yes, very sad that happens to children and adults.
@angelofknowledge938918 сағат бұрын
@@youtubemariemorinestrangement and, in many cases, it should happen.
@ARS-fn6px6 күн бұрын
For me.its the opposite. Im the child and I screamed and yelled for an apology. Instead I got a closed door and my mom blocked me on everything.. She has her favorite daughter on her side anyway...
@beaglerescue528120 сағат бұрын
Screamed and yelled for an apology hmmm sounds like narcissistic rage. Maybe a mature approach.
@billd71977 күн бұрын
I look at it this way. My kids know I love them and they’ll come around eventually. I guess mature up so to speak.
@donmorris43997 күн бұрын
7:30 👏👏👏👏Say it again for the people in the back! 😆
@eireannbullimore77637 күн бұрын
Or maybe they should figure out what they did to their children. People don't cut their parents off entirely for no reason, if your adult child has decided to go no contact, you have seriously fucked up and there's no way you wouldn't know about it. They also need to accept that their child may very well never talk to them again, their children are under no obligstion to heal a relationship that their parents fucked up
@sheilaspanbauer44417 күн бұрын
Not true. My sister stopped all contact with not only our mother but myself and another sister. She has an abusive husband who I tried to defend her from many times but she's manipulated into believing that we are the problem instead.
@eireannbullimore77637 күн бұрын
@@sheilaspanbauer4441 People in abusive relationships don't come under the definition I've just given. They didn't decide for themselves to cut their parents off, you just said itself, your sister was manipulated and bullied into doing so. She hasn't decided that, and there's every chance that she will come out the other side and talk to you all again. Please don't conflate children who cut off their parents with people who's partners force them away from their whole families.
@deeznuts73758 күн бұрын
Your hair is absolutely gorgeous!!
@kekkic8 күн бұрын
My 60 year old sister ghosted out 80 year old parents for no known reason. She always has some mental issues and also turned her kids against them too. The only thing we can think of is that my parents arrived a few minutes late to a family event. I will never forgive her for this.
@giannidescalzo21018 күн бұрын
This probably doesn't apply to your situation, but sometimes siblings don't understand that things were different for them growing up, even within the same family. I was badly abused as a child, by someone whom my brother absolutely idolized. He thinks we had the same childhood and everything should be as hunky dorey for me as it was for him as the family darling. I haven't, and won't ever tell him what happened to me, because I love him too much to shatter his worldview but sometimes it's very difficult for him to get why I cut half my family off years ago and he thinks I'm melodramatic. My abuser is dead now though, and it doesn't really come up anymore.
@mmorin8815 күн бұрын
@@giannidescalzo2101thank you for sharing. I admire the love you have for your brother.
@dianagarrison31382 күн бұрын
You don’t know the reason but you’ll never forgive. Flying monkey
@headleygrange62058 күн бұрын
It is truly astounding how many grown adults cant fathom that they may have done harm to their own children and cant figure out how to take responsibility for it. Its a bunch of whiny cry baby b.s.
@kidzrrelevant25937 күн бұрын
I cannot tell you how glad I was to see your post. Grown children have lives and are living them. Good Lord, learn to cut the apron strings!!!
@rgee51767 күн бұрын
Then again, some kids just can't realize that parents do the best they can & they're not perfect.
@headleygrange62057 күн бұрын
@@rgee5176 Then again, parenting is the most important job one has in life, and the old "we did the best we could" line is all tired and worn out. Imagine if that lame excuse passed muster for airplane pilots and school bus drivers. Yep, no one is perfect, but some do try harder than others and some can take responsibility for the times they fail.
@rgee51766 күн бұрын
@@headleygrange6205 So, keeping your heart filled with anger & resentment may work for some, but it's too heavy a burden for others.
@mmorin8815 күн бұрын
@@headleygrange6205it is hard to imagine any human setting out to harm their kids. Unfortunately, and this is not to excuse but add insight, most individuals go into adulthood carrying baggage. They are imperfect people raising kids. The sad part is kids get hurt. The line “did the best we could with the resources we had” is to lessen the extreme guilt for the condition of being human and making sometimes huge mistakes. I think some parents gain insight and are remorseful for their actions. These same parents have kids who don't want to repair. They want to take responsibility and have changed but aren't given the chance.
@irmavalles8848 күн бұрын
Send them a nice big fat text , let them know since you don't hear from them, you don't have children that care about you. You have decided to leave the inheritance to the church Or to your favorite charity.
@suzettesoto83897 күн бұрын
Doesn’t work I’ve tried EVERYTHING
@MultiAnne366 күн бұрын
I was just thinking about that yesterday.
@angelofknowledge93896 күн бұрын
Some of us don't care about the inheritance, which is quite a few million. We're glad to finally get away from the lifetime of physical and mental abuse. The mother was finally placed in a psychiatric hospital by a judge after gun violence. Her diagnosis, anti social personality disorder. She can keep the money. We all have our own that we made without inheriting it. EVERYONE knew she had pyschiatric problems since birth. My father died in his 40s.
@angelofknowledge93896 күн бұрын
@@suzettesoto8389move on. You're an adult. Live your own life. Your job is complete
@enigmadk_6 күн бұрын
You honestly think that will make your kids talk t you? You don't have kids do you? Well not anyone that want's to talk to you i'm guessing.
@KlintonWyont8 күн бұрын
Thank you that's a beautiful advice I have a 22 year old daughter that hasn't talked to me since she was 16 and it's killing me I pray for her everyday 🙏 I beg her constantly for her forgiveness to I know I was a shity dad I'm not the same person anymore I've tried to explain to her that people can change and she just doesn't get it I guess😢
@headleygrange62058 күн бұрын
You traumatized her. Why should she spend energy on you? Do you know what it takes to heal and move on from childhood trauma?
@KlintonWyont8 күн бұрын
@@headleygrange6205 actually I do,spent my whole life with my old man all methed out and beating the shit outta my momma and us I never beat her, I was in drugs,that was like five years ago man 🙏 I will be praying for all of us, 🙏 ma'am it sounds like you can relate 😭 your humble brother in Christ 🙏
@eireannbullimore77637 күн бұрын
You daughter is under no obligation to heal a relationship you fucked up. Do you really blame her for not wanting to spend her time and energy on getting to know you again? Not wanting to be reminded of your shittiness when she looks at you, when she has been far better off, moved on, got her own life, is doing much better without you?
@sherlytanco28357 күн бұрын
Leave her alone if you were a shitty dad you deserve what you get doesn’t matter if you changed. Apologize and let her move on.
@KlintonWyont7 күн бұрын
@@sherlytanco2835 no ma'am where I come from you don't turn your back on your family no matter what God has never turned his back on me and I will never turn on him or her,but I do understand what you are saying,thank you for the advice and you are probably right 👍🙏 your humble brother in Christ 🙏
@InkRavenLion8 күн бұрын
I graduated college in Dec. 2009, right in the middle of the great recession. There were NO JOBS. My parents harassed me every day for weeks. Multiple phone calls, rude voice mails and e-mails, asking why don't you have a job? Why are you so lazy? You are not even trying. You have a job yet? I finally cut off all communication for 2 straight months. Then I would answer an e-mail once a week just to let them know I'm alive. I eventually started talking to them again. I guess they learned not to harass me, because they never did anything like that again. I normally do not believe in giving people the silent treatment, but in that case I had to for my own sanity.
@KlintonWyont8 күн бұрын
First of all no good parent would harass you for not having a job they would take you out and help you find a job you did the right thing unfortunately sometimes things have to be that way😢
@marcywells37267 күн бұрын
FYI - I try not to pick sides when an issue doesn't have anything to do with me. Stay neutral.
@JacquelinElizabethWrites7 күн бұрын
I'm in a similar position now.
@mmorin8815 күн бұрын
Ugh! Absolutely not helpful or supportive. So sorry that happened to you.
@mmorin8815 күн бұрын
@@JacquelinElizabethWritesin what way?
@loraliecataldi19758 күн бұрын
I’m definitely experiencing complicated grief at this time. I’m not sure how I’m going to get through this. I can’t afford a competent therapist that understands this type of situation. It’s definitely not for an intern who is on a steep learning curve. What worries me is that due to decades of abuse by my parents I’ve already exhausted all psychiatric treatments as I was diagnosed treatment resistant/refractory back in 2014. It took nearly 18 months to get into 85% remission. Only one medication in the entire arsenal of what Psychiatry has to offer by way of treatments and therapies works for me and this whole experience is now leaving me in partial remission with no alternatives left to improve or help my condition. I feel from day to day I’m sinking
@youtubemariemorinestrangement5 күн бұрын
I hear you. Check out my website. Get my free ebook. Please commit to caring for yourself.
@sarahhobson40368 күн бұрын
Mine th7nk hes the boss but my s9n is not 😮
@MarkBH708 күн бұрын
I tried for years. He told me he would never try to contact me again. I told him he was telling me I was not his son. He denied. Then admitted. 1996. I called him in 2000. He was angry. He blamed me for hurting his feelings. I just called him out, in 1996. It's 2024. I forgive him, but I'm resigned that he hates me. Actions speak louder than words, snd he is loud.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement5 күн бұрын
I'm sorry this happened to you. Sounds like he's unstable and unsafe.
@Thoughtworld19848 күн бұрын
Four years now. Both kids. I'm still paying that child support though. I am beginning to understand why the psychiatrist warned me against getting to the point where you won't have them back. 😢
@teridoster58408 күн бұрын
You’re still paying child support for your adult children?
@headleygrange62058 күн бұрын
You want a medal for paying child support for your children?
@sheilaspanbauer44417 күн бұрын
Paying child support doesn't come with a guarantee that your children will want to be around you. Child support is just to provide for them, like you are responsible for. You still have to put in the effort to build a relationship with your child. If you believe that you suffered parent alienation, you can fight in court to get your parenting time.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement5 күн бұрын
If they're teenagers its almost impossible to force them to see you even with a court order. Its time to focus on moving forward while simultaneously doing small gestures to remind them you are there and the door is open.
@mistiblu94428 күн бұрын
TY!
@RitaBattey-yw8vk8 күн бұрын
It’s ssooo painful
@youtubemariemorinestrangement5 күн бұрын
I know it is. How long has it been going on?
@janserventi8 күн бұрын
My dad didn't want me married, so he broke windows out of my car and house. Found a marble in my sons crib. He beat all his wives and kids. He killed neighbors and relatives dogs. I left Ca, and was the best for me. I've been a neurological mess my entire life. I found it's better to isolate myself because my youth still haunts me.
@christineblumke84939 күн бұрын
Thank you 🙏
@youtubemariemorinestrangement8 күн бұрын
You’re welcome 😊
@yvettejk9 күн бұрын
The culture is encouraging to weaponize seeing babies on the bases of germs/vaccinations. It is heartbreaking.
@mistiblu94429 күн бұрын
Nail it!
@FlowerxLady9 күн бұрын
It’s absolutely horrible, especially when the grandchildren are involved. They’ve gone from being with me at least 3 times a week to 0. No FaceTime, phone calls or anything. It’s like a sword in my heart 💔😢
@youtubemariemorinestrangement9 күн бұрын
I’m so sorry this happened to you.
@mistiblu944210 күн бұрын
🙌
@annmclpc10 күн бұрын
This therapist is part of the problem. This parent needing to change is a misconception. We are all imperfect. We all can hope and strive to be better. The idea that these kids don’t feel safe is ridiculous. Such a cop out. There is a misconception that they are not safe and I’m not feeding into that lie.
@youtubemariemorinestrangement8 күн бұрын
Thank you for commenting. Perhaps you have misunderstood the content. The information provided is a report of what individuals, parents and adult children say regarding their family. Of course parents are not perfect. What AC say is when there are events and behaviors, the hope for them is that their parents take responsibility, apologize and use what they have learned to be different with their AC. Unfortunately, you may not believe it, but there are parents who are unsafe with their AC.
@annmclpc10 күн бұрын
Whatever-how do you just assume the parent is supposed to change?
@youtubemariemorinestrangement9 күн бұрын
The information provided is from research of AC. It’s not my opinion it’s what they say.
@FlowerxLady10 күн бұрын
I have, multiple times. I’m met with insults, ridicule and nothing kind. No attempts to have a conversation or even let me know what I did. Everything was awesome until one day… it wasn’t. 💔
@teridoster58408 күн бұрын
“Everything was awesome until one day… it wasn’t”…. That very well may be your perception, but I find that hard to believe (unless your adult children are dealing with substance abuse issues or something of that nature), and if you look inward and truly think about what has transpired over the years, I’m sure it won’t seem so sudden or out of the blue. Self reflection and accountability is required if there’s ever going to be any sort of reconciliation. Good luck to you
@youtubemariemorinestrangement5 күн бұрын
Do you have any idea what might have prompted their decision?
@Akartavor10 күн бұрын
Im a divorced dad and my wife cheated on me in 2014 with a wealthy man 20 yrs her senior when my twin girls were 9 and we got divorced. I had what a thought was an excellent relationship my daughters until this past year when one of them moved to her moms and then a couple of months ago the other did. They seem to want nothing to do with me and left for college without even saying goodbye. Is tough on me no doubt because I truly have no clue why but life has to go on. Maybe we can rekindle a relationship one day, maybe not. Sad of course but weird. They probably have their reasons but I was blindsided. Oh well.