Dr Doty’s last comment/advice is so true and helpful. Thank you for a great podcast!

Wonderful and helpful video. I especially loved the distinction of emotional empathy and cognitive empathy. I've trained at this for years without specific terminology as I show Brene Brown's empathy video and then add my own take/definition that empathy is "less about what you feel and more about where you are" (am I sitting down beside you to understand your worldview and challenges). The conversation around sympathy left me wondering whether there might be a Venn diagram here with sympathy one circle (I feel for you), empathy the other (I want to understand your world and your pain), and compassion the overlap (I genuinely, altruistically care about you). Thank you for always stretching my understanding of MI.

Wonderful, what a philosophical conversation 😊Nevertheless deep, insightful and supportive. The story of the group meeting of Jewish and Muslim was personally supportive and insightful as an Israeli these days. It's occurred to me few time while listening, that based on my personal experience of being able to opened up to compassion, that for one to really being able and be compassionate helpful with human being and self, it's required allot off as the teaching saying "back to the body" practices. Also to have even the basic knowledge of human development and emotional needs in order to have the capacity to act from a calm/regulated physiology stance, one that can recognize what is harmful and what is helpful. Complex it is, and unfortunately unavailable to all or raise resistance in others. Maybe that's why our world is struggling to be compassionate 🥴 P.S the topic of Shaming, although 'easy' to understand, something in me do wish if it would be interested by you to elaborate on that, maybe from the perspective of the threat or drive system or both (is it the inner critic of the one who do the shaming who motivates and 'runs the show' ?). 🙏🏻

Been practicing a few days. The phrase "i wish to be loved" the most touching for me; emotionally honest, soothing, subtly energizing, peaceful, in a bubble of calmness. Why? A tender child "wishes", it's his/her "innocent" need and request to the Love Nucleus of the Universal---where it came from. 2) It's an active state, "to be", not a repeated grievance, past, i.e. "wish i WAS loved". 3) non-specific, no limits how it appears... gorgeous sunset, stranger's smile, call from a friend, a deep connection inside, heart and toes tingling (aura expansion). 4) easily morphs into "i wish To Be love". Now touching the "I am" souce of me inside, ie, "i am Love" becomes the dominate experience of self/Self and world. (Until you allow a distraction to de-rail this beauty-truth for a moment.) Mind-watching with self-compassion will bring you back to that "state of being" you naturally enjoy and want more than all else, and initiate all actions from in the world. Eventually (i hope), such becomes our tangible, expansive beingness Itself, beyond all events, hi and low, big or small, all constrasts or evaluations of the judging (critical) mind. Peace to all in need.

Great interview. It reminded me to look deeper into my therapy as there was a lot he spoke about that refreshed my memory. Great stuff 😊

Exciting stuff Stan and James. Looking forward to your channel being a regular staple Stan 😊

😂 Start of this informative episode. Motivated now to obtain James's book...

Grief is love with no where to go.

For those of you who struggle with self love and worth here is what clicked for me: Love the LIFE inside of you, see it as the wonder it is, marvel at it and you will, I hope, find yourself in the magical realm that is life itself. For me “self love” was some impossible psychological trick until I understood that “my” life is just part of LIFE. Then it clicked.

Great and I have listened to your interview with Chris Germer many times!

Dr Stan It was a privilege listening to your talk today on shame & grief in the Loss & Grief SIG anchored by Dr. Darcy Harris. Happy to subscribe to your educative channel. Look forward to learning much from you & the renowned experts, foremost the pioneer himself Dr Gilbert. Many Thx Neena

What a nauseating tone of voice. Try a more spontaneous and less preaching communication style.

Thank you ❤

I became very deliberate a month ago - I saw clearly that to get the life I want I have to want the life I have. And that meant doing the work of shedding… everything turned around so fast the bliss actually scared me. Then two days ago I woke up with Bells Palsy. This is too specific to me and my stuff but I absolutely believe this arrived as the opportunity I need to face the shame I am ashamed of having - the shame for the things I wouldn’t do today to save or preserve anything. I miss the life I lost to being an asshole and I am so afraid I’ll never be able to build something beautiful again. But I want to and that’s a sign I’m caipable

That was a good impression of Paul saying "we all have tricky brains" :) Thank you for putting this together into video form - a great intro to the main concepts.

As a grateful "grad" of the Compassionate Leadership Training, I am in awe of the creativity and commitment that carried Laura and Evan to share their vision through the Center. They have gathered an accessible and supportive community of caring, based on empirical data and scholarship. Thank you, Stan, for this Compassion in a T-Shirt conversation!

1) take credit when credit is due. 2) talk about specific behavior. 3) give credit to others.

fantastic interview! :)

Thank you for your program, and the interview with dr James Doty. I am learning compassion. Dealing with elderly parents. Also broken yought. But i am helpfull and give lots of love and compassion! Its sometimes not easy. My love is real. Suffering home a lot . But doing the wright thing And so much greatfull ! Thank you so much from belgium ❤

🎉well deserved.

Congratulations!

Dennis Tirch is great! Love the work he's being doing.

Wow Stan, I can hardly keep up your recent excellent output!!

I'm in need of your prayers and positive energy. Please keep me in your thoughts.

I thoroughly enjoyed your conversations and hearing more about the diploma course through Wendy's experiences of developing and running the course. It's definitely given me a flavour of how it would be structured and sounds incredibly supportive for people to develop the skills at their own pace. Thank you for your questions to bring clarity to the training. Much gratitude as always

Yes! I would love that T shirt!

Mix of ACT, DBT and CFT - Stan - maybe CFT leans into a more 3rd wave mode after all? Great video, fine bullet points. We can own stuff that might have contributed to our "suffering", but recognise this, develop compassionate understanding and take forward a different direction.

Dennis makes some excellent points - reflective, not overly rigid, and cautious with his thinking. Going to have to listen to the whole of this again. Great guest.

I would love a one-to-one session with Dr Doty.

What a compassionate conversation. I have deeply resonate with the "Civil War" idea, it's definitely an internal civil (parts) war where the inner critic attacking it's on system (community) parts and where himself have been created by neglecting care givers which were supposed to be the safe "civil" to internalize. Speaking of Schema Therapy, one of the things that supports me allot to activate the soothing system and restoring the capacity for self compassion is children books, and recently there are few new ones about self compassion for kids which are simply amazing. It's OK -Wendy O'Leary and Good Morning, I Love you, Violet ! - Shauna Shapiro PhD. Maybe interesting to hear your thoughts on those books 😊

Thanks

He disparaged the Secret program AND Rhonda Byrne in typical yesterday's Stanford mysogynist misunderstanding! The spiritual FLOW of connecting with the HIGHEST AND BEST GOOD for EVERYONE is definitely taught by all the teachers he mentioned, but Doty's EGO has not found balance, equilibrium or ANY spiritual humility or connection! Like MANY successful academics and scientists, he is thinking correctly (finally) about the necessity of COMPASSION and KINDNESS, as so many of us already have found. However, his compassion has not found its depth yet. He is still BRAGGING about his accomplishments!! GREAT, he did good at Stanford ( full disclosure: I"m a UC Berkeley grad, older than Doty and have studied with, learned things from as best I could, and become Friends with almost ALL of those brilliant spiritual leaders.} Doty is on HIS path, but has not yet encountered his INNER MYSTIC. Good luck, blessings, and stay the course of COMPASSION. {A TEST: how much compassion do I have for each homeless American, or Palestinian, or Columbian citizen who is homeless in the hundreds at your door!} And, his compassion does not yet extend to those who suffer with negative attitudes!! I am an energy psychologist and hypnotherapist, and recommend to Doty that he go much DEEPER into himself. I think Dick Schwartz's IFS therapeutic approach might be transformative for Mr Doty. Thank You. Blessings, love and PEACE to both of you for ALL the GOOD you are intending to do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you Chris and Stan for bringing such wisdom to us

I don't know why everytime I subscribe to this channel, I appear unsuscribed 10 minutes later and it is a pity because I don't receive alerts about this amazing contents. Thanks for this channel, it is very helpful for learning and applying compassion ❤

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Great interview Stan. I was blown away when Dr Lee mentioned Ben Cousins' father driving him to a drug deal. That story has stuck in my mind for many years as an act of 'radical compassion'. Incredible.

Thank you. I've found Russell's first book to be so helpful and have been looking forward to the workbook. And thank you for bringing up the topic of "angry women." It was both painful and validating to hear.

Beautiful, thank you! I have been learning more about schema therapy and this episode is such a wonderful bridge between the two therapies, which seem to have so much common ground. I see so much commonality between the Healthy Adult and the Compassionate Self as well as between "multiple selves" and schemas/modes. I believe I first encountered schemas (at least in terms of schema therapy) from a book by Chris Germer, including the value in being able t o identify schemas as "tender spots" we can remain aware of in our self-compassion practice. So, thank you for bringing this subject to your series! Much wonderful food for thought.

Theres nothing wrong with wanting physical items like a nice car or a nice house. Using the moralistic terms "self serving, narcissistic" is totally out of line when describing someone who simply wants a perfectly legit thing, be it a Ford Fiesta or a Porsche, a 1 bed flat or an 8 bed house. This guy is literally just describing "the secret", but using slightly different terminology, so as to lend himself an aura of authority - to sell a book that doesn't really add anything practical to the subject that hasn't been described in dozens of existing books. He is just saying the same thing, maybe with a weak reference here or there, his book isn't the "antithesis of the secret". He, in fact, is the narcissist - not those applying the "law of attraction", ie. those attuning their mind to that which they want (rather than that which they don't want), and didn't need his advice on how to do so.

Thank you for sharing your insights. I’m a guide in the field of grief and loss. So interesting that connection with shame.

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Every word....🙏 May the world, now more than ever would be able and opened up to this brilliant though simply natural human capability (not to say a core need). I know personally how hard is it to get open to self- compassion and to self-kindness in general because of an attachment traumatic childhood experiences, but it's there, inside of each and every one of us human being. Amen to that 🙏🙏 and thanks for spreading the word🙏🧡 such a needed and important one.

Absolutely courageous

So to speak, by order of one's seriousness, gilt > shame > embarrassment. Aren't them?

You mention the fact of a person having intrinsic worth for just being human, however I was raised Catholic and told that you had no worth outside of your value as being good enough according to your efforts to God and your parents. It would take a long time to believe that you had such worth if you were raised to believe that you couldn't earn it without the church's approval of you.