The official car of "Here's your pizza".

I had a '93 Festiva. I loved it. Got about 42mpg,. I got t-boned at about 5mph, which totaled the vehicle. Afterward my dad said, "I can use the wheels on my wheelbarrow!"

I remember a highschool festiva/ metro/Hyundai drag race in 1990. we are still waiting for the quarter mile winner....

"It feels like an empty refrigerator box sitting on a skateboard." Hold my beer.

I had one for a short while. Remember the first Batman movie? The one with Michael Keaton? Yeah, I was an oily teenager at the time, took the hottest girl in school out to see Batman on opening night. Thought I was pretty cool. About 20 minutes into the movie, and just as I was about to make my "move" to put my arm around the girl... Dude comes up to me with a flashlight. "Sir, did you own a yellow Ford Festiva?" "Did?" "It's on fire." By the time I got outside - it was burnt to the ground. Electrical fire under the hood.

these cars, much like motorcycles, give you a real sense of appreciation for just how fucking fast 90 mph is

I thought you said Ford Assfire. That would be a strange but memorable name for a vehicle.

i used to work with a guy who loved his festiva so much he still talked about it in any car related conversation even a decade after he sold it. i gotta find one

This story is kind of long but I hope someone reads it. So my Uncle Larry, a 6'3" 300+ pound man, never was interested in cars. When he needed a second vehicle to get to and from work, he bought a Chevette. It died, so after some searching, he found a Festiva for $800. It handled his frame and he didn't look *too* comical driving it. Until the day of my Grandfather's funeral. As our entire family was feeling pretty down, Uncle Larry decided to use his physical stature compared to the size of his car to brighten our day. "Yup, I love my little car" he says, with a shit eating grin on his face. "Makes me feel like Mario Andretti every time I drive it!" Uncle Larry CHARGES at the car, and in one motion, rips the door open, flings himself into the driver's seat, slams the key into the ignition, and fires the engine. Just after the engine turns over, we all hear a loud "BANG", as both front wheels come flying off the car and roll into the ditch on either side of the old dirt road.

As someone who owns both a Ford Fiesta, an F-250 Long bed, and a military Deuce and a half I often say I'll put my own Fiesta in the back of my pickup truck.

"Its so small it could fit in the back of my pickup truck" No it couldn't dad, your truck can barely fit a fridge

I just bought a 1988 festiva and have been binge watching festiva videos. Fun fact- my grandfather was Ray Bradbury! Hearing you mention him made my day 🥰

I remember in 1997, friend of mine backed up with the door open, bent the door and hinges all up. Was heart broken (it was her first car, so understandable). We took her car, loaded some tools in the back, drove to the local pick n' pull, and in under an hour had found a donor, pulled both doors off, swapped hinges, banged the bend out of the door, and had it back together. I did not get laid.

Thank you guys so much for having me down to PA! I love it!

I saw a bonestock festiva in my local shop&shop parking lot. What a unicorn...

it is still produced in iran (2017) and it is sold around 5.5k$ new they're just face lifted and more shity

ILPUDDITINDABAKOFMAHPIKUPTRUK

A Mazda made by Kia, that's branded as a Ford...?

I had a 1990 Festiva in red with a five speed. It was actually a good little commuter car. I didn't regret buying it. I was poor and it got me to work and back and out of town on weekends. I took care of it (regular washing and waxing, armor all on the interior plastics) and it help up just fine. I kept it until 1999 when I got a Mazda Protege.

I can put that in the back of my Honda Civic.

"no im not taking my tail off its who i am" not quite shure how to interpret that but i have an idea what it could mean

I had a Festiva for a while. It had been rear ended, and was no longer street legal. Instead it became a desert hopper. I beat that car like a rented red headed step mule. Took it places 4x4s said "nope" to. At the end of its life the poor little bastard had almost as many GM, Toyota, and Peterbilt parts in it as Ford. It was a loyal car that did all I asked of it, and more. RIP, my little mule.

I want to cram a 7.3L Powerstroke in one of these.

I had one of these in 1993, cheapest thing I could find after my Toyota Celica died and cash was short as I had just gone through a divorce. That car saved my butt. Anything else would have been too expensive at the time to own for me, and it was actually fun to drive. Wish I had it still.

DAMN IT MR. REGULAR YOU ARE A GOOD WRITER.

We need more sub-ton cars. It's magnificent when your vehicle only weights an order of magnitude more than you.

my ex had one of these. When she dissed my VW fox as a toy car, I reached down, grabbed the wheel well of the rear tire and hefted up until there was daylight under the tire. It was FUN to drive that Fiesta tho.

I remember my brother-in-law had one of these as a fuel-saving measure. I think that was when he got pulled over by the Wisconsin State Patrol for only driving 45mph. He did that to save gas. They probably rolled their eyes.

1700 pounds? I think that's lighter than my 95 Impreza coupe. And it doesn't even have an engine or transmission in it!

That thing is THE visual definition of Rice.

It looks like someone from GTA online modded that car

The pete and pete references made me love you that much more

Festivas are way cooler when you chop them into trucks.

I remember this car, my older brother, who was 14 at the time, got one of these for free from someone down the street from us cause it wouldn't start. He had it running within 3 days and ran the ever loving hell out of it. One day he ended up rolling it over into a ditch and got one of his friends with a pickup to pull it out. He kept it for around 4 years until he got bored with it and junked it. Good times, good times

This was my first car and it was brand new. I had no problems with it and loved it. I even did a couple road trips in it, one was Illinois to Northern California and back. I also used it on my twilight job delivering pizzas. It always reminded my of a giant roller skate or a miniature minivan. I wish I could have that car today.

I just bought 2 of these for $800 the other day. VERY hyped to give them new life.

I love seeing crappy modded JDM like cars. Makes me happy inside. I dunno why. I guess they make me laugh.

ahhh gotta love this car. 0-60 eventually

Had one... Swapped out the engine and transmission for the 91 escort gt, then gave it 205 60 15 tires on Taurus wheels. 528 miles on 11.5 gallons with the speedometer bouncing. Gonna buy the next one I find

I had one. It could fly . I was doing 90 and scare the crap out of me ! It hit me that I was doing 90 in a tin can. But it was the easiest car I ever worked on . I did have the stick shift one.

I desire this car.

The empty refrigerator box sitting on top of a skateboard analogy was good.

This car looks like the american version of "do you even vape bro", and "lets go to taco bell".

My 6'4" 300lbs father drove one until the floor fell out. He moved on to a Toyota Echo.

The Black Ice air freshener really tops it off

I'm surprised you didn't mention the Shogun.

We had one growing up and drove it from nevada to alaska many times, put almost 500,000 miles on it and had different colored parts all over it when my dad finally sold it. Always started and we drove it 80+ mph all over the western US! Thank god a squirrel or small cat never ran into us!

"I'm not taking my tail off. It's who I am." Dead center of the bullseye with that one.

LAST TIME I WAS THIS EARLY RCR WAS STILL IN SEASON 1

Hahaha I've seen this dude's festiva all over reddit before this episode.

Funny one broke down right in front of my house and lady just gave it to me and walked home pink slip and all I'm in now !!

This video made me get one, its the most fun little car ever! Edit: 6 year update. I ended up owning two Festivas, a 91 GL and then a 93 L , both with 5 speed manual transmissions. Kept the latter for 4 years and put over 10k miles on it. It was extremely reliable, all I ever had to replace was the clutch cable and put a set of tires on it. Had a lot of great memories, including driving it 8 hours through the night to attend Festiva Madness 2018. I recommend this car to anybody.

Dude, just like my 93 civic dx, this doesn't have a passenger side mirror either. I just cannot believe that was an option back then.

“The Festiva was a...” “Shitbox”... that’s the word you’re searching for

A bone stock one just went up for sale 30 minutes ago in my area. When I emailed the guy asking if it was still for sale, he said, "Yes. You were the first to ask about it so I'm emailing you back first." LOL 30 minutes in and already garnered some interest. Less than 200k miles, garaged most of its life, and he's only asking $600. I cannot wait!!!

"No, I'm not taking my tail off! It's who I am!" Thank's for reminding me of me.

"if it weren't for this car, the Fiesta wouldn't exist today.", he says. Ford Festiva - 1986 Ford Fiesta - 1976 ... what?

The steering wheel, 5 point harness, billet quick shift handle, & rear subs w/ amp are worth twice the value of the car alone. lol...but in comedic value the car is certainly worth more. I think the owner should go the extra mile and hook up the oil cooler, but kudos to him for a job well done regardless.

"When the sun shines on you more often than not, people forget that you know what rain feels like too" one of the best quotes ive ever heard

“ that they wasn’t” THAT THEY WASNT?!

This was one of your best reviews dude! Cant remember the last time I saw a Festiva, but I did see another piece of junk known as a Subaru Justy last winter. Must have been in an automotive coma most of it life :).....

"Imma putit in da bak o my pikkup truk" god I love that line

A coworker of mine just sold his running and driving 1991 Festiva for $150 with 400,000 miles, original engine, original clutch, he was the second owner and had bought it in 1993 at 20,000 miles.

I had an "88 4 speed stick shift and it was the best car that I have ever owned. I bought it almost new with about 6,000 miles on is. I went to way over 100,000 miles and never had any bugs whatsoever with it, not even those so-called bugs you get with a new car before it wears in. That is except for the brakes. The brakes wore out regularly, but with lifetime warranties on brakes from Autozone I definitely cashed in on that warranty very often. The brakes just were too little, even for such a little car. I would have never got rid of that car, but I bought a newer car and couldn't keep 2 cars. To this day, this was the best car I ever had. People with junky ones like in this video just never cared for their cars and let them go to pot. These cars weren't in any way, shape, or form bad like described in this video. My sister had a "90 that was just as excellent until she had an accident that rolled it.

No! I'm not taking my tail off, it's who I AM!

Jay Leno has one of these...with 275hp without nitrous and over 300hp with nitrous! It has a 3 litre Ford Taurus SHO engine placed where the rear seats would normally be and it cost $35,000 in 1989 which was the equivalent price of a Porsche 911 back then! 250 were hoped to be produced but only 7 were eventually produced as no-one wanted to spend Porsche money on a Ford Festiva!

Mr Regular, for ages I’ve been trying to remember the name of that book I read in middle school that I really liked. I knew it rained all the time but every time I looked up that criteria I could never actually find it. Every time it rained I thought of the book but couldn’t think of the name. The book was All Summer in a Day. Thank you for reminding me! Never did I think a car review would be where I eventually found the book again.

My college roomate last year bought one with his friends back home. It had nothing besides two front seats, one seatbelt, an engine, 3 pedals, a shifter and a steering wheel. No doors. No glass (besides a windshield). No hatch. No cladding anywhere, just exposed metal. That was an amazingly fun car to thrash around gravel country back roads

I read All Summer In A Day in middle school!

So its a Ford designed by Mazda made by Kia powered by Honda

You have at least one profound statement in every review. "When the sun shines on you more often than not, people often forget you know what rain feels like too" Deep.

I got a loaded festiva lx in 88 as my grad gift.. it was truly nice.. truly fun to drive... Your assessment is in retrospect and you didn't buy one new.. the 5 speed was a delight...and I drove it packed to the gills from Pittsburgh to LA. And loved every mile...

I was in Korea in 1986 when the "Kia Pride" came out. The big idea was to cover the streets with cars before the 88 Olympics, to make the country look more prosperous. Previously cars had a VAT tax that was pretty hideous enough that only the rich had them (The British Ford Cortina was what they had been driving). A few other cars from that era made it to the states, like the Hyndai Pony, the DawWoo Racer (Buick Lemans).

Who watches a RegularCars review at 4 in the morning?

My grandmother had one of these in the early 2000's. Still does, actually. It's still sitting in the garage of her summer house in the middle of nowhere in Northern Northern Minnesota. This video makes me wanna bring it down to Cali and fix it up, because it carries memories for me too.

My mom owned one of these all six years I was in junior high and high school. I hated it. I made her drop me off two blocks away. I would do whatever I could to avoid being seen in it. Now I'm 30, and I can't appreciate the cheapness and simplicity of it and kind of miss it...

That was a fantastic imitation of that muffler sound at the beginning. Did you play brass?

Festivas for the restivas

"No I'm not taking my tail off!! It's who I am!!" Oh man..this hits home. I used to have a V6 1992 Plymouth Duster with a bullet racing muffler and a side pipe exhaust that used to wake the dead. I had a version of that conversation many times.

I had one when I was living in Bronx NY. It would blow through the snow left by the plows and leave everyone still digging out. once I had to go to a school and fix a computer connection issue and everyone that had some computer sense to fix the issue had enough sense to also stay home that day, but me that is. so I went downstairs and the neighbors said " you will never get out of that spot" and I hit that snowbank 3 times and was free. 2 hours later I returned to see everyone still digging out their large 4 doors. I parked in the same spot cause the car was so dam small no one could fit. My kids told me every time someone wanted to take the spot would stop then pull up a little and then just drive off. A couple of cars tried but did not worry cause everyone would yell "you a not going to fit, better off looking for another spot then wasting your time with the impossible." I really miss that car. it was the first model that had an automatic cause everyone knew it to only have stuck. (tear falling down face) I miss that little beast.

I like staying up late for this wonderfulness

If that was on the road here in Australia, it would have been pulled over by the Transport Inspectors and defected off the road. The rear muffler- "sharp pedestrian hazard". The blacked out front lights, illegal. The fake oil cooler on the front bumper- "sharp pedestrian hazard", etc. How that thing is allowed to drive past a cop in the USA is staggering.

Dude you’re inspiring me to be better at English with your subconscious take on these reviews, honestly thank you

8:09 I've been trying to remember the name of this shortfilm for like 20 years. No one knew what I was talking about when I would describe it, and randomly I come across this video. Thank you.

Reminds me of my 89 Ford Probe, that thing was a beast.

Thank you, I own and have modded an Australian 2000 ford festiva (aspire to usa) and it is the best little car, no it is not fast, not it does not have any luxuries (power steer? nope, auto windows? ha ha nope, tacho? nope... it does have air con) but boy is it good on fuel... i drive 350 kms on a 30 litre tank which usually costs me $20- 30 (australia). I have an aftermarket steering wheel, long gear stick, tacho, stereo, cannon exhaust, tint and rims. it gets looks all the time, maybe not the looks i like but... a look is a look. thanks agian for the vid.

My first car was a 1997 Assfire automatic. I remember I used to have to floor it to make it up the hill on the way to high school. If I got a red light at the bottom of the hill, I was screwed. 63hp automatic = horrible. I now drive a 73hp Subaru Justy with a stick, and it feels infinitively faster- I bought it in Lincoln, New Hampshire and love driving it in the White Mountains.

I bought one with 20k on it. Sold it with 120k, never had a single problem.

"Kia and pride" Say that again in 2019

"I CAN PUT IT IN THE BACK OF MY PICKUP TRUCK"lol

I have had two of these cars and I love them. One I purchased in Panama and drove to Washington, D.C--had three people offer to buy it in Mexico. The car ran and ran......and never died....even in Guatamala. The next one I drove for two years and it never died either....sold it and bought a pick up that both could fit into...but I love the festivas....cheap. God, besides changing the oil and the 12 inch tires I spent 16 dollars on maintenance on the first one for three years and the trip from Panama and the second I replaced the 4 speed for a five...that transmission cost $125 didn't spend more than $2000 to purchase either.

I was recently turned onto your channel by a friend and the number of "The Adventures of Pete & Pete" references in some of your videos makes my heart swell up dangerously.

Owned an '89 Festiva, can confirm.

I don't if anyone else has notice the owner of the car used a spent 30mm anti-air shell as the gear shift knob.

Thank you for the mention of the story by Ray Bradbury, I saw that movie as a kid and for the life of me couldn't remember the name. Keep up the great work, love the channel.

I bought a used Festiva back in the day for $1500. It was two years old and already had 42,000 miles on it. A commuter car, I guess. Although I had it another six years, I didn't ride it so hard, so the odometer only rose to about 80,000 miles. I loved it. It got 40 mpg, I never had to buy new tires. I could pack in a lot through that hatchback and with the rear seats down. Shifting the 5 speed manual was so fun. It was so reliable. Gawd, it took no time at all to wash it. Oh yeah, when I left the country and had to sell it, I still got $1400 for it. $100 depreciation over six years. Still my most favorite car. Today, I live in Japan and drive a small Daihatsu Mira Kei car with all the bells and whistles. Whenever I drive it, I think back to that Festiva...

0:17 - I can't still get if that sound is Mr. Regular or the muffler itself. Also, PR In Space theme at the end!

Are you ever going to review a Nash Metropolitan? LITTLE LITTLE CAR.

In my travels, I spent 10 months or so behind the wheel of a 4 speed, carb Festy. Being in Denver, it had even less power due to the mile high thinner air. In daily driving the only thing that sucked was having the a/c on while in stop and go traffic. There just wasn't any power. This was my greatest challenge, otherwise it was a blast to drive the slow car fast on the highways and interstates. To this day, I still want one.

Pete and Pete was such a damn good show, that crossing guard was the loneliest man in the world, so bittersweet. He wasn't able to save that cat 😢