31 !! ...i am 62 and never had a girlfriend ..tried everything when i was younger ..dressed up , went to the gym 3 times a week ,went out every weekend ..all my mates got the girls and their girls would tell them how ugly i was ...every girl i attempted to talk to made an excuse to get away from me ,like introduce me to a friend then walk off laughing ..every girl i asked out turned me down ..all that "oh you will find someone someday" is a load of bollocks ......i have never even kissed a girl or hold there hand ..how could i possibly ever find anyone ..you have another 31 years to catch me up !!!

Please stop telling him to “Just be confident” in the comments section. Confidence is bullshit.

I got my first girlfriend a couple weeks after i turned 31. Even though we broke up 3 months later, im grateful for the experience.

5'5 going to clubs alone... respect for trying at least

its tough out here for alot of us guys, women have no idea how easy they have it when it comes to dating.

Respect to you for making this video. I'm not gay but can tell you ain't a bad looking bloke, there's no end of these videos on the internet with men being single permanently so it's a common trend. Myself am 36 and am these days a bit on incel. I feel your despair at what to do also, dating apps don't work, going out doesn't seem to work so no clue to what the answer is.

I hear you bro, you're not alone in feeling alone. I hope you get something positive out of sharing this, you're a lot more secure with yourself than I am by doing so.

You are not ugly! That’s an awful thing that was said to you. I have the best hope for you truly. Life is so tricky in regard to social relationships. Sending you positivity!

Bro don’t give up. I learned how to date by improving my social skills. As I improved my social skills my dating life improved. The key is to not get too attached to results and have fun.

I'm a fair bit younger than you (I'm 5'6" on a good day and you kinda look like me just older) but I was in the same mentality from the latter half of high school to the early parts of college. Granted, it is a lot easier to interact with a lot of girls when you're still in uni because you have to go to classes but I think some of the things that I've learned about the world will stay relatively similar to the way it works in the real world. The biggest thing that changed for me over the past couple years is my confidence in myself. I wouldn't say I'm all that confident now but it's miles and leagues better than how I was at the end of high school and when I began uni. I feel that us guys are really hard on ourselves, we are overly self-conscious, and we overthink everything. It's hard to change this, it feels so normal to look at the world through a negative lens and think that people are either A. predisposed to dislike us or B. actively think negatively of us. This thinking is really obvious to others (even when we think there's no way they pick up on this). Here's a few things that I did and pretty much every one of them is a mental shift (in retrospect this is what I was doing, I didn't really think about it in an intentional way): The more you focus on women specifically, the worse you will feel. Our lack of experience with girls is one of our sore spots, I am a hardcore introvert as well. I'm still in uni but I don't hang with friends that much and I don't have a particularly large social circle. It's not all that often that I feel lonely. However, when I do, I used to just wallow in self pity and wish that I was super social (basically just wish that I'm someone that I'm not). Nowadays, when I feel occassionally feel lonely, I think about how I prefer to be by myself and the negative feelings I get from draining my social battery. Oftentimes those thoughts bring me solace and calm my rising turmoil. If it's a particularly stubborn bout of loneliness I will plan something to do with friends (usually a couple weeks to a month in advance) so that I have something to look forward to. Have things to look forward to. One of the most therapeutic things in life is hope/excitement for things to come. I have about three friends that I've kept in contact with from high school (messaging probably about once every month or 2 months, so it's not super often or anything) and I will ask them if they want to go camping or on a small trip for a few days. Now I know that when you're a real adult (not in university and past the age of fake adult activities like clubbing or partying) people have spouses, children, or a lot of responsibilities overall that stop them from spending a lot of time with the boys. However, it's not too dissimilar from how it is in university. My friends work part time jobs/internships over winter and summer break which definitely postpones my plans a week or two or three almost every time. It's just as hard to plan things with others now as it will be when I get older. However, the thing that I started without really thinking about it was being persistent. I would think "they definitely think I'm being annoying" "I should stop asking them, they probably don't like me". Luckily, I didn't give up and my plans often came to fruition and we (at least one or two of us because oftentimes not everyone can make it) would go on the trip. It would just feel nice to KNOW that whatever I'm going through now is just temporary because I'll at least get to have some fun with the boys in a couple weeks to a month. You said you're not an outdoorsy sort of person and to be honest neither am I. I just think that we spend so much time playing games that we neglect to get out into the world. We are also very self conscious so when we do outdoors stuff we think "I look so weird/stupid doing this" "Everyone is probably looking at me and thinking I'm a creep" just because we aren't very skilled. I'm gonna give you a bit of knowledge that I finally realized after wayyy too long. Nah, nobody cares about you. Yeah, they might give you a weird look or maybe have a passing thought that you're a bit strange but that's actually a RARE occurrence. Maybe 1 in 10-20 people will actually acknowledge your existence in their minds to have a thought about you and maybe 1 in 1000 will actually interact with you, even more rare, maybe 1 in 20000 will appear in your life again. You're older than I am so you probably know even better than I do that what you did in high school didn't really matter. Going on trips and the things you do on those trips, how you look to other strangers on those trips, is basically just the same thing as high school. You'll never see them again, just be yourself. Really, now that I think about it, the biggest advice I could give to you is to learn who YOU are and to accept that sure, you could change stuff if you really wanted to, but there's not much you can do to change who YOU are. That might make you a bit depressed because you're probably like I was and have low self-esteem, you immediately think about what YOU think your "bad characteristics" are and how you're "stuck" with them. If you want my honest, uncensored, not trying to make you feel better in any way, just brutal opinion? You look like a pretty average dude (if not slightly better than the average 31 year old honestly speaking) you think you're too short but honestly you have a pretty good height (5'5" 5'6" feels like we're short but it's not terrible really, we can sit in any seat, clothes actually fit us, we won't have early onset back pain just because we are super tall, we aren't 4'6" so it's not like we can't ride amusement park rides or wear adult clothing. It's just a comfortable height to be once you get past having to look up at a portion of the human population((If you think about it that way it kinda feels stupid to worry about height at all lol)). Sure we THINK girls care a lot about height, but I've talked to a lot of girls in uni and the main thing I've learned is they can pretty much decide if they are attracted to you ((the girls worth a damn at least, life lesson: ignore the opinions of people who just want to start trouble or always seem to find themselves surrounded by it)) so it doesn't really matter if you're 5'6" or 6'6".) You have a pleasant personality that comes across as genuine and kind (this isn't all that common so you should be proud of this). If you want to get better at holding a conversation with others or girls specifically, just find a reason in your surroundings to start talking to them (the weather is nice/bad, they dropped something so try and pick it up for them ((even if they are going to pick it up too, yea it's awkward but it's a guaranteed convo starter)), they are wearing something related to something pop culture that you know, etc.) and then give them a turn to speak. Just hold eye contact a fair bit and be a good listener. Most people like it when others are interested in what they have to say, since we don't get out much, everything other people say is interesting to us so it's not like we're being manipulative or a bad person for trying to talk to them. Once someone talks a bit to you, it's easier to talk to them and then you're less likely to feel like you're saying something creepy because at that point you're just having a conversationg about your lives or something interesting to you. Overall and silly things aside, we should be grateful for the things we have because it can DEFINITELY get worse for us lol. However, we should still find things that we feel like we lack, analyze them critically to see if it's just 'grass is greener on the other side' or if it's something we may genuinely be better with having in our lives. Chin up brother, we still have many decades ahead of us, and cmon, even if we never get a girlfriend, we've always got each other.

You’re honest, but it’s important to love yourself first. Starting with a hobby is a good way to build confidence and meet people. I hope your situation improves.

Sorry you were called ugly cause you're definitely not. Have a blessed day

Rooting for you man !

You got this man hang in there get out there. And even if its across a microphone with someone online. Start slow. U are talkimg very clear and there is a woman out there that wants someone as soft as u seem. Never ever give up.

"I wish I had the answers!" Here are the answers: -Most people are not tall. -Most people don't have a lot of money. -You can be happy without a relationship. -Tons of people have had relationships, so it's not that rare or special to have one. -Most people don't even like their partner. There you go.

I feel your pain, man. I have been 16 years single. I'm kind of accepting my fate. I don't think I will ever get another relationship.

Big advocate for the gym. Main benefit I've had from it is gaining confidence in your body and self, being around strangers. Second benefit is for your health. Both incredible confidence boosters. Last thing to mention is go travelling! Re-invent yourself. Stay in hostels. All the best mate.

Please know I have so much love for you, and love will find its way to you when you least expect it. You are not ugly, you are not a bad person and you are not unlovable. You are important, brave and more than enough

you're calm, no one is bothering you, you have peace.. something people would pay trillions to have.. start there..

Please keep your head up! Life is hard and unfortunately it only gets harder.

What gave me the most confidence is >READING

Face the hard truth and level up, use your pain as motivation

YOU ARE PERFECT AS YOU ARE!

No wife, happy life.

You seem like a great bloke mate - chin up, and know you are worthwhile. I dealt with shyness and confidence issues in my younger years so I feel you - but things can get better!

I'm 26 and been in one relationship which wasn't great if I'm honest because i dealt with a lot of psychological abuse throughout. I was also brought up in a strict religious family so wasn't encouraged to even have relationships with anyone that wasn't from the same religion and this (along with my shyness and introverted personality) has made it incredibly difficult for me to pursue romantic relationships throughout my adult life which is frustrating because i personally believe that the best time to learn how to behave around a girlfriend is during your late teen years because there's no expectations for you to be fully mature and you're far less likely to be expected to commit anything long term. Short term relationships when you're young teach you valuable life lessons so a committed long term relationship becomes far easier when you reach adulthood. Sorry this comment is so long but I wanted to express a few personal feelings I have regarding how to best have a healthy romantic adult relationship but then this is coming from a guy whose only had one experience with a girl so I'm no expert.

Honestly the only way is switching location, even if temporary. You'll have luck in countries where being from the UK is a cool thing by itself.

7:43 I’ve totally been there. They feel really bold about doing it because that’s all they really value and they know that they can get away with this act of cruelty.

Life is tough: some of us are male yet too feminine and fragile looking or female yet too masculine and strong looking. Good luck in your life.

im 36 next month 5ft 1 and far from in shape but i had a few sounds silly but if ya out looking people can tell and it puts them off.... each of my relationships have always come when im not even thinking about it... dating apps are horrible avoid like the plague and just try and join things you enjoy and go from there (i met my ex streaming and mutual invited her to join a game)

I have had feeling very down for the fact that I`m 20 years old and have never had girlfriend! I was always comparing myself to others people at my age who already have tons of experiences and feel angry, sad and confused about this. But I released and I know it`s true that you don`t need someone else into your life to be happy (girlfriend, wife or friends). Of course this doesn`t mean that you shouldn`t have friends or wife and children, but simply to realize that they are just one of the things that can give you happiness in life and if you are unable to have it then you can find happiness in other things in life. Loneliness is feeling not a real thing.

I see people recommending the gym, it helps but it won't get you a girlfriend and turn you into a chick magnet, women care more about confidence and status. I consider myself good looking and a gymrat and practice skateboarding but I'm not confident or charismatic or have a good paying job. I'm 31 year old and never had a girlfriend, some guys are just not chosen by women.

Hey dude! Can tell this video took some cojones to make for you, so you should be proud of yourself. So first off, you have anxiety. I can see it in how tight your shoulders are, your talking patterns and the self doubt that creeps in at the very start. Give your GP a call and just talk about starting a conversation about anxiety. It comes with the social awkwardness and if you get it under control like I have...dude you will flourish. I don't do well on dating apps either, it's a toxic quagmire. I think you'd have way more success meeting people in person doing hobbies and that kind of thing. Gym can be a great place to meet people, but meeting women there is a bit dicey but there's all kinds of people you can meet there. You're not a bad looking dude and women who care will not care about your height. I don't know how you dress outside of your house, but based on your t-shirt you might want to revisit the wardrobe. If you get some new, non-ratty stuff that fits you and suits you well with the cut of the fabric and appearance it'll make you POP. I think the first step would be to do the work on yourself first and be happy with where you are on your own - being single can be lonely at times, but being secure with yourself in the life you have before you add someone else into it can be a long road but I believe in you! Get out there. Fake it 'til you make it. The first step is hard. I know, I had to take it too. You've got a bit of a road ahead but from this video you seem like a sound dude and if we lived nearby I'd absolutely grab a beer with you. You got this!

Bro, it's easy to get one. Realize that you'll have to go through multiple rejections to get one of them. Not all of them are the same and not all of them have the same taste of men. Ask yourself, what do women like? And then ask yourself, out of these things, what can I improve? But at the end of the day, improving yourself will take you halfway to the goal, the other half is learning to connect and socialize based on what they like, how they live, and what is fun for them. Do not express feelings too early when connecting, make them wait a little when giving it to them. They crave this aspect and the more you give it, the less it will mean when you say it often. Fill your day with plans outside of your house, this aspect is key when trying to find someone. If you go for a hike somewhere cool, or if you go shopping, go this place or that place it will make them think that you are self-sufficient and will possibly make them want to join you in your activities. Dont pass up an opportunity to let them join you, you will get a girl you just have to be where they are. Get good at finding places where you can talk to them.

i know you just wanted to do this video and let your thoughts out and i support that. i wish you best and i hope you find her......

I feel ya brother. 5’4 but I round up. My escape is black desert online without it I know I’d be feeling real lonely

Man this life shit be tuff

Hey man, as long as you're happy. Dont find a woman just because you think that's what should happen. Only if you want that in your life. I was 23 when I had my first girlfriend. I was really happy before that, i just "thought" that's what i needed to because normal life 🤷‍♂️ By 25 we'd had a child. By 27 she'd cheated on me twice and fell pregnant again. DNA test showed he was mine, we tried to stay together for the kids....she cheated again. By 29, I had a new girlfriend, we had a kid when i was 32 and she changed drastically. At least once a year i had to stay at my parents for a couple of months. Life was a real rollercoaster of emotions. Cut to last year (41 y/o). I've finally had enough, moved out, got my own place and saying single forever now. I'm finally happy again. There were a couple of happy times in there but it's overshadowed by the hurt and misery. My point is, if you're happy, good for you man. Nobody needs a girlfriend.

honestly, i know i can get a girlfriend fairly eisily, but what keeps me back is the belief that if a woman doesnt add peace to my life, she isnt worth it. And while ive met some pretty great women, and ive even dated and been with them, most women today arnt worth it. They cannot bring a partner peace, because they themselves arnt at peace.

Go to Southeast Asia…man…seriously. Look, I have Asperger’s, but I joined the Navy at 19 and wasn’t diagnosed until I was 28…but I lived in Japan and traveled around Asia. You can find a girlfriend abroad…plus you’ll be out of your comfort zone.

This is so extremely vulnerable. It seems that you sense a lack of community. You mention not having many friends and I don’t know what your family is like, but there is all kinds of love in this world that make us feel less lonely. You talk about having an emotional connection and spending your days with this “person”, but there are so many different types of people you can have an emotional connection with and many people who can be in your lives as long as you want them to be. You might even meet your person by building community. I know that you are an introvert, but make the gesture to do what your friends/family want to do and develop a closer bond. I think everyone in the world craves love/care and we can find them in so many different ways.

My take away is that you need someone to go along with you to these things that can help you. Whether that's someone to workout with you, someone to introduce you to new people at pubs, night clubs and other social events. Your height may not help but not every woman looks for 6'2 in every partner. You're not a bad looking guy at all. I wish you all the best

I think what's best for you is to put your feelings regarding your virginity or lack of a girlfriend aside and just try and meet people in general. Women are people just like you and me, and just focusing on making meaningful connections with people regardless of gender will make you feel better. Even if just over the internet, find people with similar interests and get to know them, don't focus so much on whether they're an option as a girlfriend or not.

I love your honesty man. God has someone for you! Praying you get your dream companion! I’m 31 as well and can totally relate the older I get the more I realise ughhhhhhhhh it’s so hard. Bro you are not an ugly dude. Your average looking

just know that everyone has a different "type". almost all of my girl friends have extremely different preferences when it comes to a man's looks or personality. just because you think some qualities aren't working in your favor, it doesn't mean every girl believes so. i don't really feel like i'm fit to give you any advice, but if i could, go out and do things that you've always wanted to do, big or small, find some enjoyment in life again. if you happen to meet a girl along the way, yay! but if not, you've made your life your own. don't give up! find joy in solitude!

Hey, keep your head up and remember it’s absolutely never too late to find love. Focus on what you can control. Do you work? An absolutely massive percentage of married people meet their partner at or through their work. I think it’s nearly 50%. It’s a great way to meet people organically, where things can happen spontaneously and you and others learn about each other, which can go further. Regarding your height, I’d maybe try wearing shoes which bring your height up more? Or soles? I feel different heights in different shoes. As long as you’re not wearing high heels, no one will think you’re catfishing or anything and it would give you more confidence for sure. And driving. I know lots of people find it very nerve wracking, but I have a friend who has big anxiety problems (who happens to face quite similar challenges to you based on what you’ve said) who has managed it and now he’s driving confidently and comfortably. Driving is a game changer, when I started driving, even though I’m not a car guy at all, it made me feel better in many ways. You’re good looking and you have a genuine personality, so you definitely have potential if you do those other things. I think if you focus on yourself, really put the work in and think - right, I’m gonna start today, then you’ll feel better about yourself and honestly a relationship will come along without you even looking for it. Take care.

You can't just hope for change you have to put the effort in and make things happen

Im 41 . I suffer for social anxiety and anorexia , all my life I have been isolated , have only few friends , I never had a serious long term relationship , Im afraid of sex , Im afraid of men , I even have no experience and I would not go to bed with bf , 41 with small experience , what I have been doing all my life ? Isolated. Im sick all my life . I would like to meet a new friends . Im a loser

I'm jealous. you're taller than I am. I'm 26 and never had a girlfriend either. I missed my opportunity when I was young because I was too scared to ask a girl out and get rejected. I tried when I was 19, but I couldn't get any woman to go on a date with me. now I'm just too old to even try.

You need to learn to "Act as if" ... You do have the personality, this video shows it, the confidence it takes to put this honest of a video up for billions to see takes huge balls buddy. You just need to redirect your attention and energy. If you can look up the movie "Boiler Room" there is a lot of lessons that can be learned from it. One other thing is stop consuming current media, go back and watch media from the 70's-90's something happen in the early 2000's that started a trend of weak, submissive men. I also hate to say it that you do have to change aspects of your life that were important that may actually be stunting your growth.

Be confident. You’re not ugly dude, you just seem insecure. There are a lot of women out there for you but never try so hard in attracting them, that is the opposite of what attracts them. Also maybe try to go out of your comfort zone in your standards, what may seem as unattractive to you visually could change once you get to know someone

I feel ya bro.

hit the gym even if you dont wanna hit the gym thats good for you in areas far more important than women - to do things you dont want to do.

This is my son's situation. Same age too. I would like to ease your mind. My son seems to be contented. If he meets a great woman, then he meets a great woman. If he doesn't then he doesn't. It's his life story not mine. I really don't have anything to criticize him about.

If you are ugly then I'm a monster and I had relationships with beautiful (at least in my view) women before. But most of them were the toxic type who didn't see me as their equal and so we eventually seperated ways. What I want to say: If you aren't the type of guy women really want then you will most likely end up with the crazy type of woman. (who had like you don't really even wanna know how many men before you and before she gave you a chance)

At your age you might as well forget about it. Any girl you approach from here on out is going to treat you like someone to be avoided. And women can pick up on it when you are the type that doesnt get women. And they dont feel pity. They laugh at you in secret.

Grow a beard ,hit the gym,don’t act too happy around women,and you’ll crush it bro you can do this.

i think you just need to take little steps to build your confidence! you are not unattractive and once you believe this others will see this too. put yourself out of your comfort zone and try new things - whether is it going on a hike or just random things that you wouldn’t normally do will make you feel so proud of yourself and build up your self esteem.

25, same

To be brutally honest with you bro. Almost everything that comes out of your mouth is cope. Aside from your height which you cannot fix, A lot of the other things you say surely can be. You say you're not good socially but you don't put yourself out there enough to overcome that. You say you don't like going to the gym because it makes you "uncomfortable, but that's the point. Instead of really looking to change the things about you that are unattractive you just accept them and remain lonely and unhappy. You either have to face these things head on NOW or remain this way for the rest of your life. Choice is yours, just don't act helpless because your not. Commit to change or accept your fate

Yeah I'm 24 and I never had a girlfriend too. 😢 Nor dated and I sill live with my parents.

I can relate. Im 29

I don't get it. You are thoughtful and good at communicating. You aren't unattractive and you aren't obese. If you had 20 girlfriends by this point in life, you'd probably be on youtube saying women are insane and you just want to be single. Life is just different degrees of frustrating circumstances.

Self esteem is THE answer. You’re over complicating it, I’ve been there. Start spending more time understanding how to help improve your self esteem and even if the gym isn’t your thing, make it your thing. The gym was an absolute life saver for me.

Im 30 never had a girlfriend only had sex once

31 never had awoman.That is really worrying.

are you really 31 year old ???

The average height of women where I live is 5'2". If you can visit me in Latin America there is a very high likelihood that you would meet a woman who likes you as much as you like her. Lots of women in Latin America would like to date foreigners because the Machismo culture of Latinos encourages cheating, and the women don't like it. I am retired and I don't charge anything to assist men who just want what nature intended. It's astounding to me that most guys take dating advice from KZfaqrs who are themselves older and single. I am blissfully married to a Latina whose primary goals are to have a happy family and a clean home. She is feminine and cooperative. We also have a lovely, well-behaved daughter. You can get what you want. You just need a new plan.

You're handsome 😍

Wait till you get in your mid 50's and still nothing.

Do this ill try to help ...wear baseball hats wear plain shirts and more colard polo shirts it will give u atleast alil more confidence at least for the start

bro we need to get you. harcut get fudked jacked asap. and start hanging out with people even if you dont want to. force yourself in social situations. go do some hard shyt in your life bro force struggle on yourself do hard thingd everyday it brings wisdom.

STOP TRYING TO GET A GIRLFRIEND. GO OUTSIDE. Get a dog or a hobby. Go to the park and train your dog or do your hobby. Be seen. People will come to you.

Go to gim and then fly to Tailand or Amsterdam. Whith 100 dollars you can change your life. Just try-

No, you are not ugly! You have stunning eyes! 😍 OK, you're short, but there are short women. Just: Don't start with: "Hi" That's boring, women get so many of these. Read the Profile and write something personal like: "I love your dog, I wish I'd have one some day." Or: "Wow! I like your humour, you seem so funny!"

Maybe you should try going to a church, maybe try visiting the Philippines, lots of women there don't care what you look like or your age, they just want devoted love, and being a Westerner they figure your a ticket out, but most men who found Philippine women seem to believe they hit gold, you just have to be careful of the gold digger types.

Woah buddy

After watching a bit, you should realize things are going to get worse when your even older. Start talking to literally every woman in a retail store before gaining enough confidence to do it in other settings. Eventually you will get a girls number; then you quickly bail and use that number to ONLY set up dates. Focus on other goals while striking out with girls and you will stay mentally centered. Just get a girl to feel safe around you (usually with laughter) and act like a girl's life is improved by your presence/time.

You need Andrew Tate in your life

Prayer use the power of Prayer trust me it will work

best advice i can give anyone with a similar situation: let it happen! forcing relationships for the sake of relationships doesn’t produce results. i wish the absolute best for you, and i think getting involved in your community will help with the loneliness. find niche groups and make friends, get super involved in your hobbies and interests, and one day, God will put the right person in your life. Take a breath, and relax. You can do this!

go hit the gym or get into calisthenics u aint looking that bad! good luck c:

try invincible by David tian and the ace formula by Adam Lyons

Have you tried dating trans women?

I get it might be harder for you since you are a little on the shorter side but being tall dosent automatically mean youre more attractive. Im mid 20s and 6'2 and never been on a date or had a gf or done anything with a girl. Matter of fact i think being tall and ugly makes you even more creepy to women. 🫤