Germans carry their opinions on their tip of their tongue. But feelings and intimacy.... buried deep down 😂

Seb, You are so lucky to have someone like Jess! :) To put some context: We germans are raised and educated in a way that telling the truth, sticking to facts and not making things up is very important. Also that our opinions and topics are based on facts and evidence, and not made out of thin air and imagination. So if a german puts so much time and effort into showing and proving that he is right he doesn't always want to humiliate the other person. But he wants to show that he is not making things up and that he is not claiming something out of thin air. Because liars, pretenders and fakers are seen as negative in german culture. This and also sticking to principles is often perceived to be more important in german culture than keeping harmony and good relationships. This is also a real problem in germany because family relationships and friendships also can suffer and break apart because of this if its too extreme.

Being friends means having permission to criticize or to correct somebody. Who else should do it, who shall improve you ? Actually improving and correcting is the same word in German (verbessern). Other languages distinguish between downgrading and enhancing. Correcting somebody means being polite and helpful. Germans say, you don't let your friends die dumb. You don't keep your mouth shut for the sake of harmony.

As a Canadian I 100% have the same experiences/ideas as Jenna ❤️ Happy to find your channel, I learn alot and absolutely love Germany!

OMGOSH!!!! I have watched both videos on this subject and all I can say is that you guys/gals are SO SPOT ON!!! My partner and I have been dating for close to 3 years now and he is German (AND Italian!!) and EVERYTHING you have said about dating a German is so true in our case. As an American, there have been aspects of dating a German that I have had to get used to. We met online right before the pandemic and talking to someone online can be MUCH different than being there with them face to face. When we first met, it was right at the lock downs started so He had to end up staying here in the states for months (much longer than we had planned) and we got a really good idea, during that time, of each other's differences. - In the other video you guys talked about the "small gestures" for example. That is very true. My partner is not big on the "mushy lovey big gestures" but he's great at doing little things every day to help me. - The brutal honesty was something that was hard for me to get used to and still is sometimes. I'm southern so we tend to be very polite and "gentle". Germans...........not so much!! :o) - Thank you for these videos, they are very true in nature and it does help others if they are planning on dating a German.

Hi Seb, new friend here.. Also have a German boyfriend. They are very direct to the point, they will say what is in their ❤️. I love German people because they will not pretend to like things even though they don't. They also friendly if you are friendly too. Keep Safe and stay connected Seb.

Hahaha great Video! You can really see how Seb is losing his spirit throughout the Video! The part about Germans arguing and wanting to be right is soooo true :)

I wonder what Jenna's experience would have been if she became a mother in North America. If she still would consider it so equal there I think it is different if you are just dating or if you are also a mother, there are so much more expectations on mothers, and I am sure that's also true for North America. . I am also married to a German and I agree, German dads nowadays do want to stay home as well. The issue is that women are still often those who work jobs that are paid less. So it can be hard to break gender roles here. But I don't think I know any new dad who would not jump at the idea of staying home with the child for a bit if it makes sense financially.

Yeah, complaining seems to be a big thing in Germany. When I worked in Ireland, it was really refreshing to have a little bit more positive "vibe" around me. Strange that we complain so much, yet our customer service seems to be sub par. Maybe they get so many complaints, they just decided to not care anymore...

Good morning guys! The standard of complaining in Germany is really high, finding a good way to be proud of the things we have and the live we can life is not so easy for us, we have a difficult relationship to words like proud, satisfied and happiness. We try to improve it, but that's a long way. So it's easier for everyone to complain than be happy. Germany is after all a very conservative country, the church and political parties like the CDU/CSU have a lot of power in this country and it's was not so easy to decide something against them. With the emergence of the Greens in the eighties and later with the reunification through the emergence of the party the Left, the political landscape changed and for the better, it became more diverse and things like more rights for woman and the first real rights for children were now possible. In former West Germany it was never really a topic in the parliament, family yes of course, but very traditional and the husband is the boss. Meet a woman that was born and raised in the former GDR/DDR she is a lot more independent and she would never let it happen that the man would tell her what to. Childcare is after thirty years of reunification still much, much better in eastern Germany. Parents and of course mother's can life there a lot more independent in that case. I'm glad that Jess didn't give up, find something positive and interesting that we can see now in your lovely videos. I think, getting something or someone a little bit to easy is very boring. Reading someone like book is uninteresting and i get easily bored. If try a little harder for it, you appreciate it a lot more and then you enjoy it a lot more. Thanks for that very interesting video.

I danced Tango with my today husband, we are both German but I have been raised abroad all my life (U.S and Asia). That explains it😂

11:40 Both, mother and father, have the same options. That in most cases the mother is staying at home has nothing to do with expectations or something like that, it's just each couples own decision. I know quite a few couples with children and in all but one of those cases the mothers WANTED to stay home to spend more time with their children. That's not Germany or germans being more backwards, that's just individual choices.

Most points made in this video are valid. As a German I wouldn't want most of it any other way though. Well, maybe except the complaining. It never leads anywhere (even though complaining is part of the being honest and straight forward thing, so it kinda makes sense in context). And hey, I enjoyed staying home with the kids.

The easy principle behind our honesty is: "Don't ask if you can't handle the answer / the truth." Easy.

Thanks for the video and your sharing. Now I know I am not the only one and my husband is "normal" 😆 and I love the new word I learnt from here - Klugscheißer 😁🥰🤭

I dont view the Motherhood-Role as a bad thing at all. I love the fact, that I am able to be a mom to my children and actually see them grow up. And I love, that I can truly rely on my husband as the "breadwinner". It actually does make me feel honored and apreciated as a woman and mother, cause thats what I am, I dont feel any less because of it. I feel 100% equal, maybe even privileged to be cared for, not because I couldnt earn my own money (cause as a teacher I actually could) but because it is worth it to me and my husband to be there for our children as long as they are small. It totally breaks my heart when people have the impression, that a mom, who chooses to care for her children at home is unequal to a fulltime working man.

About 11:50ish I have a lot of male coworkers who take maternaty leave instead of their wives. I think it just depends on who does earn more or who is more expendable. There are a lot of men who take matenaty leave. It depends a lot on the company, too. Where the HQ is based on.

A hilarious clip and I have to admit I'm guilty in many points (as a german). That said, the whole topic of "equality in a relationship" really puzzles me. Or let's maybe say "percepted equality" as there seems to be the very personal view of Jenna, of how she FEELS about the "role" she feels she is somehow pressed into by society and how this defines her own perception of "worth". Even going so far to see the possibilities given to parents to stay at home to take care for a toddler as somehow counter productive for equality. I don't think the North american way is better. Minimize the possibility of paternal leave and less help for child care do not help women to feel more equal. I have to admit its frustrating, seeing the long way we have come and the constant complaining about the status. From the time I was a young father, NOT having had the possibility to stay at home for a while. Now as senior manager with highly trained teams of mixed genders. I just know that even my male department heads will take a parental leave and one of my female specialists is full time at work while her husband is full time taking care of her toddler. Is he now the one "less worth" in the relationship? For sure not! Things have changed SOOOOO much. Yes, we are still far from being finished, but calling the development of the last decades somehow a step back is really not true.

Look, I am a german, living over 10 years in Chile. My problem here is just the same on the opposite. Means I have the fealing that everyone is lying just to keep the mood of a meet & greet high. With the result that believing a person about what he /she says even if they give their word on it is impossible which annoys me very very much. You can not count on anybody from my way to see the world. By the way my wife had hard times with me as well about my honesty and if we are in good company and she tells her experience concerning my "honest" behavier people are "frightened" however finally she tells that at least she could be sure about my saying. So, da Ihr in G. lebt nehmt doch den positiven Teil all dessen und versucht zu lachen. A propos, wenn Ihr tiefer in der Sprache drinn seid werdet Ihr, sofern Ihr Euch umschaut erkennen, daß wir viel, sehr viel über uns lachen.

Thats was fun! Can you do a video about Singapore History or Singapore Technology? I am a Blockchain Developer and uff Singapore is kind of the hotspot. I met so many cool people from there but I have no clue at all and as Sebastion I dont feel well if I have Halbwissen or in this case Nullwissen :'D

Complaining about the delay of DeutscheBahn is our favorite aktivety

Btw ..in Québec is very different for the rest of Canada ...here in Québec the new mothers have 1 year payed maternity and men have also leave...so more europ

Such a nice couple ❤️

Seb trying his best to defend the Germans...(more like defending himself) 🤣 good job seb 👍🏼

I think the perception of you anglo-saxon women is hyper-sensitive to this stuff. When your accountant says "why are you working?" he is not saying you shouldn't work because you are a woman. He is saying, "Look, sister. With your tax situation, just from a calculatory point of view, you may as well stay home and enjoy the perks of a leisure life". Some people actually like that, irrespective of any gender dynamics.

It really seems like Jen doesn't want to be the MAIN caretaker of her children. Unless you work part time, someone else is being the "MOTHER' to your children ...no easy way to say it.

concerning #3: Germany is called by its own citizens the Land der Dichter und Denker (country of philosophers and poets) 🤓

From a viewpoint of western cultures in the EU and North America Jenna is right that Germany moves slower on the question of gender equality. It is there on paper but in practical terms the system is still geared towards stay at home mothers when it comes to financial incentives and often also supervision. Granted technically the system allows for fathers to be in that role but the lived reality has a clear bias.

So I mean the bit about your accountant does make sense tho? Especially if you see it from a neutral accountant point. If you dont get too much money out of a lot of work, and I am guessing that is it because we dont have a lot of information, then the question makes a lot of sense. Why would you work as the, "low earner", if you could live comfortably off of one paycheck, thats also something I assume. If any of my assumptions are totally wrong ignore this and go on Im just German and like to discuss things I guess. :D

If someone does give you unsolicited comments on hair or clothes, just say: „You don‘t have to wear it.“ Works wonders. 😉

Being right is totally fine. It is awesome, when you can back it up. Entitlement to the own opinion has its limits. Goes both ways.

"Head over heals" means in German "Hals über Kopf"!

Are you dating a German too? Let Jess know if you feel the same too! Are you a German yourself? Do you do some of these things too? Seb would love some comforting that he‘s not the only one in this situation 🤣 Ultimately, the loves overweigh hates - DUH!

Question is what causes the "equality" in North America. Correct me, if I´m wrong, but the maternity leave is much shorter, because people are pushed back into work quickly? So you would only know how much more advanced it truly is, if extended maternity leave was offered and then being used equally by mothers/fathers. I somewhat doubt that America is more advanced in this regard.

Complaining about germans, you are already german 😉😄

Thats so funny: Jenna is talking like a machine gun and Jess is so calm and slow 🙂

I like this Video. :)

So many true things. I am also from germany. #1 guilty #2 guilty #3 guilty #4 a bit guilty #5 difficult topic, depends on the situation, what seb said hehe

Even as a german, I sometimes find it annoying when people here complain so much about everything. Sure, if there is a mistake or problem it should be addressed and criticized, but sometimes it feels like some people just have a very pessimistic view and don't seek for any solutions but instead just complain for the sake of complaining. And it also sometimes feels like people don't cherish the good things they have in life, and only search for every tiny bad thing they can find. When we compare Germany to other countries, some people here don't realize how good the conditions are here compared to many other places in the world. And when it comes to politics, it feels like some people just complain for the sake of complaining instead of actually suggesting a solution or way to do it better, and some people just have this mindset of "everything the government does is bad and is only meant to exploit the normal people, therefore I am against it" instead of actually taking a more differentiated look at things and discussing them from a rational, logical standpoint. I think some other countries have a more positive and optimistic attitude, which I like more.

This is very interesting..all three of you...and help me better, finally ''understand'' the Canadians😊😉...for a Transylvanian leaving in Montreal for more 20 years ....all this ''culture'' shocks☺....finally I am very ''german/ european way .....and find all this ''hollywood'' stereotypes...tired me and are so fake ...,

Well, men cant breastfeed. So of course we expect the mother to stay at home at first. Edit: Damn saying we have no equal rights here is like heresy!!

Hey guys , please send German guys my way , I’m South American but with a German heart❤️. I do nots speak German though

12;58 i agree totally with the point, i feel Germany is not totally equal gender yet

Germans don't beat around the bush which is the No1 reason why I love them

I am complaining a lot too, which is a waste of time most of the time, but this is german nature I think. My japanese wife stays quiet...hahahaha..

As a Canadian… Canadians are not friendly and outgoing for the most part… Americans are way more outgoing. Canadians are reserved

Doch!!!!

I think the discussion about motherhood, genderroles and taxes is a little one dimensional in this video or maybe it is because it is all mixed together. First approach is the rights thing, men and women have equal rights in germany. Germans are very rational people so there is a logic in the woman stays at home and cares for the kids, first of all, if you breastfeeding it makes sense, women tend to me more attached to a new born (only natural and logical, we are not that old as a species) etc so there are monetary, biological, medical and parenting reasons for that. Boiling that down to social pressure and gender roles seems very simplistic. There are a lot of men that stay at home while their wifes go to work, bc the woman makes more money for example. I also agree that comparing Canada without being a mother to motherhood in germany is somewhat flawed as you dont have the real canadian experience. I tend to agree that in smaller towns and villages in the countryside there might be more social pressure on a woman to stay at home and be the mother/housewife than in cities, but I think that is not specificly german, but a global phenomenon. The tax issue is the same thing, I never read a tax law that you have to choose the split tax categories, you can also go for the 4:4 and not for the 3:5 split. It just in some cases makes economic sense if one makes more than 60% of the total household income, i dont know what exactly is discriminatory about that, as there is nowhere written that this only happens if the husband makes more then 60%. I just wanted to point that out there, because there were so many takes, that in my opinion paint a wrong picture, it is not a critizism per se, as I understand it is hard within this video to address these points fully especially when you are jumping topics. And yes I m german and yes i m also correct ;)

@Sebastian, if you think you have to defend yourself in germany when your girlfriend accuses you of acting like a german.... try living in the US, married to an american for over 25 years now :) . quite an adjustment. americans get their feelings hurt so easily... delicate little flowers :) It is pleasant to live here though, smiling and being overall friendly is nice. Germany could try that some time. What americans call "service" still annoys the eff out of me, though... singing voice: hi my name is kimberlee, i am going to be the one who brings you much of what you order..... then i will apologize profusely, please tip me at least 20-25% of the total bill, he he....

please send refer me with single German men 😍. I’m an exotic South American living in the US with a German heart . But don’t speak German though

Canadians don't whine? Try talking with a French Canadian. You'll see how much we whine.

This video is too passive aggressive. Turned into 'Why we hate our husbands'.

So why not leaving Germans all alone? so they can live in their perfect honest world all alone