Same here 🤗

Agreed

Yes. God bless Dr. Marks!

indeed

I can be the same way 🤕 it sucks the joy of creating right out of it.

Yup. For me, it gives me a sense of control, I guess. And I'm not the villain for saying others did it and don't look like the victim. Instead, I push the faults on myself.

How about if trauma is coming from sexual abuse? Am I to blame if I was just a kid? What I’m missing here, I’m trying to understand you

@@38kenaly You're not the problem here. OP of comment is in dire need of proper therapy it seems. The logic is "I did this to myself, my bad, no need to be terrified of the world" when more accurate is "Not my fault, yet always my responsibility to deal with all my own problems, no matter who's fault it is" Instead, Cognitive Dissonance. I've been through a fair bit in this life, and unlike the vast majority of people you see online saying Do YoUr OwN ReSeArCh I actually know how, and constantly challenge my own beliefs and Confirmation Bias, checking for Logical Fallacies too, and slowly learning more of those as I go too. End result: It appears that in stable countries, violent crime is extremely unlikely to happen to people. I think it was Sweden, where 1% of the population were responsible for 63% of all violent crimes. Those numbers themselves were very, very low out of the total population. Then I had a nosey at UK crime stats, and it seems there, it's a minority, of the 'criminal' grouping itself, who are disproportionately prolific offenders doing anything from anti-social behaviour to violence. Most people are good. Many are not clear thinkers, and justify nasty behaviour online, as what they see as good intent. Don't let the news, social media, and Groupthink, bandwagon fallacy, echo chambers make you think the world is truly terrible, is the main message I'm trying to get to people here, not just you like :) Something appallingly ironic happens if you get addicted to social media like this. You think the world is a cruel place, stay on socials, poison your mind more, and it gets worse and worse. At minimum, BAM Major Depression even in otherwise 'healthy' people, and stokes political extremism every which way at once.

@The Horseshoe Party UK i don't understand why people have to show how smart they are. This post was meant for the video creator not to impose my thought process on anyone. We all go through phases of healing then falling and then healing life is not a straight line . I have been in therapy and I do take medication and yes I know ita not my fault but sometimes the post is how I think I don't understand why someone who went through another trauma whould come and be like sexual abuse was my fault ofcourse its not there are millions of different trauma

@Kenneth Torres did I say I ehat trauma I went through? Why I think like that? Did I ask you to think like I think? Did I say I went through sex abuse? There are different kinds of traumas ,different situations like domestic voilence etc . Im not saying this is right im just posting my thought process not saying this is how you should feel

I'll try pull relevant simple philosophy maxims for each or something useful Perfectionism: "Strive for perfection. Always. Do not get sent under or chuck tantrums if you cannot achieve nor receive it. If absolutely necessary, no choice, accept the lesser evil"- The Horseshoe Party UK Rumination: Once you've learned all lessons you can from whatever incident, it's time to move on. "The past only exists in footage and memories. The future as far as we know, is not decided yet. The only time is NOW, always" - The Horseshoe Party UK Inferiority Complex: Uncommon Knowledge UK video about it. Separate your feelings from the facts. So what if someone has x y z. You're you. All you can ever do is be the best you! Self-shame and guilt: you are bullying yourself, likely as a result of others doing it. If you had a loved one in this situation, would you treat them this way? Likely no. You are allowed to like yourself. Just not be overly arrogant. Quote by Simon Sinek: "Confidence is believing in yourself. Arrogance is treating others as subhuman. Confidence inspires. Arrogance destroys". There is some overlap, but they're not the same. False Equivalence: "A Labrador is exactly the same species as a Komodo Dragon. Truly. After all they both have a face, eyes, mouth, nose, torso, four limbs, claws and a tail" Depression: Carol Dweck Growth Mindset is a good place to start. Also ATM I'm loving Mark Manson's video 'The Backwards Law'. Also watch for people trying to drag you into their Groupthink, Crab-Bucket mentality. Inferiority Complex: See previous, though it's a good chance to drop Epictetus: "Who is my master? He who decides who I do or do not like". He was born into slavery, and became one of the most popular, sought out Stoic philosophers of Ancient Rome. He was BAD Psychological Projection: No advice but I like the Everyday Health article about it. Final one, see self shame. Also "even when you think about the past, you're doing it NOW aren't you?" - Alan Watts. Further quotes: "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst" - often cited to Aurelius, but no clear evidence. Possibly Disraeli. "What stands in the way becomes the way." - Aurelius "Obsessively hating your enemies is like you drinking poison, and expecting them to die" - often attributed to Buddha, no clear sources, also Maya Angelous and more. "Be water" Bruce Lee's Philosophy massively oversimplified "If you're going through Hell, the best course of action is keep going through" "Solitary trees, if they grow at all, grow strong" - Sir Winston Churchill - a very mixed character, did some terrible things, great things, pithy quotes. Also terrible at maths! "Don’t depend too much on anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you are in darkness" - Ibn Taymiyyah. ""The saying "where there is a will there is a way", is not accurate, often unhelpful, and can even encourage delusion. However, "without will, the ways will never be found" is more accurate and helpful" - The Horseshoe Party UK "Desire is making a contract with yourself to be unhappy, until you get what you want" - Naval Ravikant.

@@TheHorseshoePartyUK Wow, that's deep! Quite a lot for anyone to get through though! Seems worth it. I think? Oh I'm tired after thinking about all that 😂😂

@@michaelchildish That person is narcissists. People like that use psychology only to learn how to abuse other people - not to tackle nor to resolve their own mental issues.

"Do yourself a favor and kindly remove those people from your life and focus on the people who are genuinely kind and encouraging to you." You are totally correct to externalize inner critic - however people who have issues with inner critic and psychological well being - cannot remove themselves from toxic ambient. That is the core problem,, that is all problem. Which CBT does not explain at all - CBT does not talk about socio-economic issues like having money, shelter, safety/security and not being able to leave toxic job or toxic relationships. Femicide statistics are real - women and men are being killed if they leave toxic partner. Depp was almost destroyed by his lover psychopath. Also - everything is contextual. Sometimes we make mistakes and it is natural to feel inner critic voice. In this case, it would not be fair to blame other people around us for the crap we done in the first place. IT is normal healthy to admit mistake and amend it - not to insist to blame other people.

@@ranc1977 I can agree that sometimes people need to be called out on things. However, if someone in your life is continuously belittling you, talking poorly of you, making you feel terrible about yourself for everything you do wrong.. especially if what is "wrong" is you just not doing what they think you should be... then they need to go. Looking out for someone shouldn't involve being cruel and condescending. It sends the message that love = abuse and that it's okay for people to tear us down for who we are, because they can't accept us for who we are, they want us to become what they think we should be. That's not fair. I'm all about meeting people where they are at and being encouraging when they take steps to better themselves. That's just my experience.

A concept that is definitely real despite the name, with both mental health and societal implications: Self-fulfilling prophecy. It can be good, bad, or a mix of both. "I believe X, so I will behave as Y, the results of my behaviour Z prove my prediction was correct" to oversimplify

"When I have a critical thought, I've learned to say "I'm having the thought that."" I am not sure that this is healthy. From psychological knowledge we have - any reaction to anxiety will form OCD issues. Anything in life is contextual. Imagine if you have made some error - deliberately or by mistake. Inner critic will appear as SuperEgo actually - and you will label this voice of reason as delusion and you will reject and suppress it with "I'm having the thought that." Now imagine what this will do to your social life and your ethical standards. Other people will hate you and be disgusted by you - for not owning your own mistakes, not being man enough to own errors you done, you will build narcissistic superior persona who is not allowed to make any mistakes, that is not allowed to show any mistakes and that is not allowed to admit any mistakes - it is road to mental illness and criminal acts. Because once you start ignoring your mistakes and flaws - you are on the road to become psychopath. You will simply rationalize and explain away anything that causing you to feel fear, anxiety, hurt, pain. All emotions are valid. Stifling down emotions and labeling them as inner critic is bad take. Inner critic - if you perceive it as enemy, as some force that you need to fight and engage battle in - you will create more of drama and chaos, not less. You will spend time, money and focus on civil war inside your head. Totally dysfunctional and unhealthy path to take. Psychology ought to explain us this in detail, but CBT is therapy of errors and narcissism so CBT doesn't explain at all. Instead CBT instructs us to build walls and spend money on pharma mafia to farm our neurosis into someone's bank account while we become zombie and obedient slave to covert abusers masked as authority. Inner critic - Jung said what we resist will persist. When we notice that we have doubts, criticism and shame - instead of dismissing it and ignoring it and stifling it down as you decided to destroy your mental health - the correct path is to have empathy towards ourselves ,as we have to other people. Everything is contextual - we need to become Sherlock Holms, scientist in a laboratory and investigate what is happening, why we feel criticism, from where it stems from. 1) is it coming from triggers and flashbacks from untreated unprocessed trauma, deep core belief we are unable to take care of ourselves 2) is it actual threat - are we in presence of pathological liar who is dumping criticism and unrealistic expectations on us - can we cut contact immediately with such covert psychopaths 3) is it Charcot Hysteria - deep seated conditioning, where there are no triggers and flashbacks but only our toxic habit where we learned as kids to worry and ruminate as habit in order to please and fix emotions of untreated mentally ill people in authority around us at the time If we understand inner critic as trauma - and we learn more about trauma, we will not live in spasm of total defense, living in survival mode as you made yourself believe that is ok due to CBT which is therapy of errors and wrong instructions that actually promote mental illness. Carl Jung | Psychology and Philosophy 🧠, TWITTER: The foundation of all mental illness is the unwillingness to experience legitimate suffering.

@@ranc1977 I highly recommend you rewrite that into something more concise. I love a long well-nuanced read and also write lengthy comments. That is literally twice or three times the size of my longest comments. If I don't have the time to do more than skim that, nearly all of KZfaq won't get past the first line. Eg to wildly oversimplify my reply to you concisely: I think you have good intent but perhaps not quite grasped the point of this video. There is a world of difference between having a moral code yet not spiralling into a catastrophising self-loathing anxiety-ridden nervous wreck, as opposed to being a nasty Dark Personality who thinks morals and ethics are for the weak. False Equivalence: A goldfish is exactly the same as a great white shark, for they both live in water and breathe via gills. "Confidence is believing in yourself. Arrogance is treating others as sub-human. Confidence inspires, arrogance destroys" to paraphrase Simon Sinek.

@@TheHorseshoePartyUK "I highly recommend you rewrite that into something more concise." So basically in this video about inner critic you spread your criticism, your arrogance and your narcissistic entitlement where you see yourself superior enough to demand and order people around what they ought to write? "That is literally twice or three times the size of my longest comments." Thank you. "If I don't have the time to do more than skim that, nearly all of KZfaq won't get past the first line." If you do not have time to treat your mental illness, then you are in victim mode, like any narcissist - vulnerable narcissists to be exact. You like to wallow in pity, self pity and seek others to gloom and catastrophize and criticize others around, as a way that narcissists feel good inside and seek worth by putting other people down while never examining your own shadow and sickness and pathology that stems from covert narcissism. "I think you have good intent but perhaps not quite grasped the point of this video." I disagree with you. "There is a world of difference between having a moral code yet not spiralling into a catastrophising self-loathing" Yes, for a narcissists it is dangerous place to examine trauma. It is much easier to treat you tube commentators as sub human and slaves and order them around what and how they ought to write their comments. I like this quotes myself: "It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness." Leo Tolstoy An individual with grandiose delusions believes they have a great unrecognized talent or knowledge, for example, they may be a special messenger, guru, or God. Delusional disorder DK How Psychology Works "The belief that one's own view of reality is the only reality is the most dangerous of all delusions." Paul Watzlawick

@@ranc1977 Really? I'm an arrogant narcissist just because I ruffled your feathers slightly with a polite and valid criticism? Yet here is your reaction smearing someone you know nothing about. Your Cognitive Biases are: Groupthink, Anchoring Bias, Streetlamp Effect, Availability Heuristics Bias, Group Attribution Error, and Negativity Bias. Your Logical Fallacies are: Ad hominem - character attacks which are either totally irrelevant to the matter at hand or outright untrue. Strawman - misrepresent the opponents argument, beat that, then act like you won. Appeal to Emotion - manipulation of the audience's or victim's emotions without any substantial evidence for your claim. Appeal to Authority - In this instance acting like quotes by noted people which agree with your pre-conceptions and biases, are at all relevant to the debate. Defensive Psychological Projection: Hilariously over-reacting to even polite criticism as you try tell me I'm the problem. Covert Hypersensitive Narcissist detected. I suggest you get some help for that, before it's too late to ever come back from.

See Uncommon Knowledge UK channel featuring Mark Tyrrell. Vids: Anxiety, Panic. OCD is more tricky and beyond my abilities at this time, sorry. I think I heard a variation on DBT can help with it. Also I'm loving loving loving Mark Manson's Backwards Law video.

@@TheHorseshoePartyUK What is the role of the rescuer on the Drama Triangle? The definition of Rescuer in the Drama Triangle is someone who seems to be striving to solve a victim's problems but in fact does so in ways that result in the victim having less power, with the rescuer benefiting more than the victim.

@@ranc1977 After your totally fact devoid LIES about me and my reputation with constant Proof by Assertion fallacy and other circular reasoning and logical fallacies, I'm not at all interested in speaking to you. Get some Facts, Critical Thinking & debate skills, get some banter skills, or go away. You're utterly irrelevant to me otherwise.

LOL! I did at one point too. My husband is (only) 25% Italian. 😀

@@DrTraceyMarks that counts haha! My current crush is Italian so I’ll keep ya posted 😂❤️

"Cant wait to part two." Spoiler: develop self worth. All trauma, inner critic stems from our deep hidden covert hate towards ourselves. This is conditioned, deep seated hypnosis that we are not aware of consciously but it comes to surface with Charcot Hysteria outlets which we label as "Inner Critic". Self worth, self love, self validation - all basis of Humanistic Psychology states exactly that : that the basis for mental health and functioning in this life is to have strong intrinsic locus of control, which means high ethical standards and common sense. Unfortunately self help gurus turn this self love concept into affirmations and other worthless crap which they charge a lot to learn about. Self love, self worth is like peeling onion layer - it is not easy task, it takes time and it will uncover a lot of hidden and forgotten and stifled trauma, grudge, rancour really that we repressed, ignored in order to fit in into sick Trump narcissistic society filled with psychopaths like Putin who will never seek mental health even though they are criminally insane. Living in such toxic society, no wonder we internalized deep seated hate towards ourselves, which we cover up with toxic habits. I like this quote available on you tube: We have this idea that what is normal is also healthy and natural. In this culture the norm is neither healthy nor it is natural. In fact, a norm is making us sick. YT Gabor Matè Tom Bilyeu

@@ranc1977 thanks for sharing. Im working with a psychologist rn. Its gonna be okay

@@negin5188

She is turning slowly to Humanistic therapies and away from crony Trump-like fascist CBT - and that is the main cause of improvement.

" I hate my inner critic" That is paradox. Inner critic stems from deep seated self hatred which we internalized from our toxic ambient while growing up. You can't heal hate with hate. Instead try to love it and accept it. See it like wound that hurts and screams for help, that needs long forgotten and never received nurture, care and empathy. If we look at it logically - inner critic is actually telling us to be good, nice, perfect, without mistakes - to fit into groupthink, conformism and society , society which is actually mentally sick like Trump or Putin. The goal of inner critic is to fit into abuse, to crap fit into abuse. Anything in life - whatever we say or do - is double binding. In this reality - we live in dualistic universe. Anything we say or do can be criticized and labeled as wrong - even though it really isn't wrong at all. It can be labeled and explained as wrong, due to double binding or dualism. This is the secret which CBT is not explaining us. Instead CBT joins into hysteria and uses its own criticism to paradoxically explain us criticism. Narcissists, psychopaths, abusers, manipulators, Machiavellians, emotional vampires, parasites - they all know this hidden secret: that anything in life can be labeled as wrong. Since we are not pathologically sick in the head - we play fair and we listen to authority and we do not question what authority claims and explains us as reality. This way we are in Milgram Experiment - where authority can instruct us to commit crimes and explain it as good and nice and productive. Being in such toxic environment - inner critic can actually be good voice that warns and alert us that we are being manipulated and controlled by sick people around us. This is very complex matter for anyone who never dared to think outside of box and realize the sick world we live in - but - It all comes down to this, plain and simple: Due to our high moral and ethical standards we are trying to be good and nice - but this makes us target to exploit. With our urge to be good and nice and obedient - we become like puppet on the string for covert abusers to exploit us - and again - due to our high moral and ethical standards we become blind and we do not see what is happening behind the curtain. Now the only voice that gets through to wake us up from this manipulation is surpassingly and surprisingly: inner critic. CBT as official medical mechanism ought to explain this in detail - but it doesn't. CBT deliberately protects crony Trump narcissistic psychopathic machinery that exploit us and make us into obedient slaves - so CBT gives us half information - mostly based on more criticism and self blame to paradoxically explain criticism and self blame - just enough information to keep our head above the water so that we do not drown. Inner critic is here as a jester, it is alarm system from our subconsciousness telling us that we are in toxic ambient - and that we need to wake up and start believing in ourselves. Inner critic tells us that we do not trust ourselves and that we place our worth in external reference locus of control.

@@ranc1977 Yup. The inner critic doesn't need hating. It's just the brain backfiring ironically in communication breakdown with itself. To hate the inner critic is to be the inner critic of your own inner critic and oh no I've gone crosseyed. Recommendations: The book about Anger by Buddhist Master Thich Nhat Hanh. He also has some talks on KZfaq. Dr Tracey's follow-up vid to this one. Carol Dweck's Growth vs Fixed Mindset, Uncommon Knowledge UK vid on Inferiority Complex, also the work of Mark Manson. He's a bit uncouth and rough for some people's tastes. He's no professional but a highly intelligent writer with an interest in Philosophy and Psychology. Relevant here is his article on the 'Feedback Loop from Hell'

Don't turn down a relationship when it comes your way?

@@Passions5555 priorities. She thinks that she can travel around Europe and see the world and then she would have time to go home and establish a long term relationship, as if time doesn’t exist. It just her thoughts seemed naive and immature to think she can have everything she wants whenever she wants. And now she’s lonely with a cat.

How did it help you?

+

I agree, but I also want to overcome all those things and feel good about my life. Today, I have a great life, but my own criticism is bringing me down, very very low. I understand that my generation will not live to see a better world, but why take this as a personal problem? We should do our best, at least try, or else our existence in this world will not have any meaning.

@ᴅʀ.ᴛʀᴀᴄᴇʏ ᴍᴀʀᴋs I guess this is the reason why it gets deleted. Too much spam and spammers. ;D

Watch the video and find out.

Growth Mindset is a good place to start. Discovered and amplified by Carol S Dweck. Else I LOVE the Mark Manson 'the backwards law' video. It's normal to have some glitches in our thoughts, which Mark Manson has an article calling the Feedback Loop from hell. angry about being angry about being angry. Anxious about being anxious about being anxious. I like to think only the most intelligent suffer that Loop the most. Else, Uncommon Knowledge UK video on Inferiority Complex did me a lot of good. Also his work on Anxiety. He's like the closest I've seen to a real practising therapist on KZfaq that goes in-depth into what you need to know.

Recommendations: Carol Dweck Growth Mindset, Mark Tyrrell of Uncommon Knowledge UK's vid on Inferiority Complex are good places to start. Also I did a timestamp comment where I dumped a load of Philosophy maxims and tips you might like? It's a lot though and it's not getting many likes 😂😂

You WANT to feel angry? Why? You don't need to be angry to have a backbone.

@@moemohamed8891 Not being able to access all of your emotions is never a good feeling inside. Good or bad, having anger is important.

After reading your comment, It peaked my interest. I want to know more about your experience. But this IS KZfaq and their can b trolls. Anyways, hang in there. I go back and forth between two extremes. If I could find a balance, I would have more peace in my life. If you have to, plz stand up for yourself if necessary. Sincerely Rae.

@@moemohamed8891 Bro you do believe me all of our actions are followed with emotions this is why you eat when you are hungry

@@angelina9379 exactly 💯💪

I don't quite understand the question, but antipsychotics are good choices to treat bipolar 1 or 2

@@DrTraceyMarks I'm in medical school at last year. Can i be a good doctor or the disease will affect me . Did u see a doctors with bipolar 2 they have a stable life and job ?