Trouble and strife - wife Tea leaf - thief Bricks & mortar - daughter Bees & honey - money Burton-on-Trent - rent Bristol City. - city Half-inch - pinch (steal) Ball of chalk - walk Cherry ripe - pipe Almond rocks. - socks Dicky dirt - shirt Round the houses - trousers (pants) Frog & toad - road Bristol - city How do you dos - shoes Westminster Abbey - shabby Cape of Good Hope - soap Bushel & peck - neck Two thirty - dirty Pen & ink - stink North & south - mouth Mince pies - eyes I suppose - nose Saucepan lid - quid (£pound) Uncle Fred - bread Stand at ease - cheese Early doors - drawers George Raft - draught Rub-a-dub - pub Down the sink - drink Mozart & Liszt. - piste (drunk) Cat & mouse - house Stewed prune -tune Khyber Pass - pass Richard the Third - bird (the word “turd” means “poop”) Plates of meat - feet Four-by-twoish- Jewish Lady Godiva - fiver (£5) Froth & bubble - trouble Jeremiah - fire Lionel Blair - chair Bottle & glass - a*ss

The Two Ronnies used innuendo and trusted the audience to use their imagination to get the punch line; something that would be difficult with the younger generation today. However, Joel, you are mature beyond your years and I appreciate you taking the time to watch this sketch. Ronnie Barker wrote a lot of his own material, and was a very versatile actor too, on television and in films. If you watch "The Gathering Storm", a film about Winston Churchill, (played by Albert Finney) during the years before the beginning of the Second World War, and Churchill's return to government, Ronnie Barker plays Churchill's butler at Chartwell House. ( His country residence in Kent). He was also in the very successful TV Sit-Com Porridge, about life in a British Prison. By the way, the cockney rhyming slang: "Richard the Third" has a double meaning. It can mean BIRD or TURD, another word for s**t. Hence the audience laughing at the use of both meanings in the sketch.

I'm cockney and yes I was born under the sound of the Bow Bells St Mary-le-Bow Church.. I grew up in the 50s listening to a lot of this being said my dad was always talking in Cockney rhyme.. I had a right bubble bath.. 🤣🤣🤣

Hi Joel! The Two Ronnies was always filmed with a live audience!

On the live audience issue, many of the Two Ronnies sketches were pre-recorded. These sketches would then be played out to a live audience, interspersed with live performances, when the show was recorded. So the laughter you hear is always a genuine audience reaction, regardless of whether the sketch was prerecorded or performed live. Anything with Ronnie Barker in it is worth watching. Porridge, where he plays a prisoner, would be among my top recommendations, particularly the Christmas specials and the film version. Another masterpiece is Futtocks End, which has no dialogue, relying solely on visual comedy.

Jps check out the two situation comedies that Ronnie Barker actually wrote they were "Open all hours" and "Porridge" Khyber pass means arse and Richard the third means turd or bird. lady Godiva means fiver or five pounds early doors means draws or underwear bottle and glass is another phrase for arse. Trouble and strife means wife. Bricks and mortar means daughter dicky dirt is shirt. Bristol is actually Bristol city means tits or Bristol's for short. Elephants trunk means drunk the other meaning for drunk is Brahms and Liszt rhyming with pissed saucepan lid means quid or pound sterling. Rub a dub means pub. Plates of meat means feet froth and bubble means trouble. Lionel Blair means chair. George raft means draught stewed prune means tune tea leaf means thief Burton on Trent means rent. pen and ink means stink bees and honey means money. Half inch means pinch. frog and toad means road. Westminster abbey means shabby. How do you doos means shoes. Cape of good hope means soap. north and south means mouth bushell and peck means neck. Mince pies means eyes. I suppose meaning nose. Uncle Fred means bread standard ease means peas. Tumble down the sink means drink. Jeremiah means fire A lot of the above rhyming slang isn't actually real Cockney Rhyming slang but Ronnie Barker is a wordsmith and cam actually make things up to get a laugh out of it

It's making sense to me JPS,as I'm from a Commonwealth country, NZ,and we grew up with the Two Ronnie's,absolutely loved them.

english humour far more subtle and effective than most other countries... the two ronnies one of the best of it!!!!! you could easily repeat all of their series just for fun

If you get a chance to watch The Baldy Man in the photo booth. The guy was played by Gregor Fisher and the short sketch was reused as a cigar advert. Totally unmissable. Ps Bristol city is slang for a woman's breast. He is not using the common rhyming slang but is using his own. One of the jokes was using Richard The Third for turd which later turned out to mean bird.

I can't say I'm getting much of it either Joel, but it's very clever! It's usually the last that rhymes with the intended one, I think. Have you reacted to Ken Dodd yet? He was one of those rare people who didn't even need to open his mouth to be funny!

Ahh, rhyming slang 😂. Aussie here, my dad would use it sometimes lol. I can understand nearly everything he’s referring to - brilliant British humour 😂😂

*Copied from another reaction comment section* Trouble and strife: wife Bricks and mortar: daughter Tea leaf: thief Bees and honey: money Burton on Trent : rent Half inch: pinch (steal) Ball of chalk: walk Cherry Ripe: pipe Almond rocks: socks Dicky dirt: shirt Round the houses: trousers Frog and toad: road How d'ya dos: shoes Westminster Abbey: shabby Bushel and peck: neck Two thirty : dirty Cape of Good Hope : soap Pen and ink: stink North and South: mouth Mince pies: eyes I suppose: nose Saucepan lid: quid (£1) Uncle Fred: bread Stand at ease: cheese Early doors: drawers (underwear) George Raft: draught Rub-a-dub: pub Tumble down the sink: drink Elephant's trunk: drunk Mozart (and Liszt): pissed (drunk) Bird lime: time Cat and mouse: house Stewed prune: tune Richard the Third: bird/turd (hence the joke with the misdirection) Plates of meat: feet Four by two: Jew Sky rocket: pocket Lady Godiva : fiver (£5) Froth and bubble: trouble Jeremiah: fire Lionel Blair: chair Bottle and glass: ass

As someone who enjoys wordplay, this Sermon feels like a brain teaser to solve. I’m able to decipher a lot of the terms.

Ronnie Corbett made a sketch after Ronnie Barker had died, with Harry Enfield - it’s on you tube and is titled my blackberry isn’t working. Just as hilarious as many of the Two Ronnies best.

We do have the modern version of ‘The Two Ronnies’: It’s called ‘Foil Arms and Hog’ who happen to have fun sketches.

Cockney Rhyming Slang is a fascinating branch of language.

Morning Joel, I had to stretch my brain cell on this one, I haven't heard Cockney for years. I thought a Richard the Third was a turd, (faeces), a surprise to find it a bird. Ronnie was a master comedian, and was a must watch at the weekend. They often did a great musical number at the end of the show, and often had very important guests. They had the Brighouse and Rastrick brass band (brassed off). I vaguely remember the band of HM Royal Marines too. Maybe look for their country musicians, Big Jim Jehosophat and Fat Belly Jones. It's a bright morning here Joel, so I'm off for a walk. Have a good day, T

Very popular for many years, these two. Ronnie Barker was a genius. He did two great sitcoms, 'Porridge' (with a London accent) and as shopkeeper Arkwright in 'Open All Hours'. You might struggle with his Yorkshire accent in 'Hours' if you ever see it, not to mention his stammering, but the two characters he played in these shows couldn't have been more different. In 'The Two Ronnies', they use a lot of clever wordplay.

Hi. Thanks, I really enjoyed that and don't remember seeing it the first time round so perhaps I missed it. Aah yes, memories of the 70's! 🤣

Good on ya Joel for getting some of them. A couple are frog and toad = road, Richard III is turd, but it turned out to be a bird which shows how elephants trunk and Mozart, shortened from Mozart and Liszt, (drunk and pissed) he was. Lady Godiva = a fiver (£5 note).

My grandmother would never miss the Two Ronnie's, brilliant! That is so clever, how easily he continues as if it's just normal speech! Some is current, some are not used any more, some too complex! 💩🐥🧐😁👍

A Cockney would, of course, miss out the word that actually rhymes. So the Sermon would go something like : ".... A long time ago in the age of the Isrealites, there lived a poor man. He had no trouble. She`d ran of with a tea some years before and he now lived with his eldest brick, Mary. And being very short of bees, unable to pay the Burton, he was tempted to go forth into the Bristol and see what he could half. He would say to Mary his bricks, `I`ll take a ball into the town and buy some tobacco for my cherry. He would put on his arm and dicky and his round, and set off down the frog until he reached the outskirts of the Bristol. People would stare at him for his dicky was torn, his howdy`s were full of holes and his coat was very Westminster. He was also somewhat unclean, being too poor to purchase any cape , his bushel was extrremely two. People passed by on the other side to avoid the pen. He was truly an ugly man. His north drooped, his minces were watery and he had a big red I suppose. One day his bricks gave him some money saying, `here is a saucepan, go and buy some food, a loaf of uncle and a pound of stand at ease. Do not tarry in the town and bring me back what is left of the money - to buy myself some new underwear. I need a new pair of earlies, for my present ones are full of holes and I am in a continual george. But instead of returning with his bees for his bricks, he made his way to the rubber for a tumble - and indulged himself freely on the bottle, and he became very elephant, and Motzart. When the landlord of the rubber called the bird he set off toward his cat reeling all over the frog and drunkenly humming a stewed. And it came to Kyber, that as he staggered along he saw a small brown Richard, and he stared at it, lying there at his plates and he said, `Oh, small brown Richard, how lucky I did not step on you ! and he picked it up and put it on top of a wall where no one could step on it. And a rich 4 by 2ish Merchant, who witnessed the deeed put his hand into his sky and pulled out a lady and handed it to the man saying, `I saw you pick up that Richard and remove it from the pavement - and that was a kindly act. Take this lady for your froth. The man took it and went on his way. And the Richard flew back to its nest. When the man arrived home his daughter was sitting by the Jerry on her favorite. She arose angrily and said, ` once again you come home elephants and Motzart...... `spent all the money I gave you. Now I cannot have my new earlies. Neither can I have wine as you do. And the man said, `fear not, here is a lady which I earned by a kindly act. The woman was overjoyed and said, `thankyou father, now I can have my pair of earlies . Verily, that kindly act has ensured that I have more than enough to cover my bottle."

My dad was born in the post-war period in working class East London, and despite him using a lot of cockney slang when I was growing up, I had to really concentrate to get more than half of the rhymes used here. Ronnie Barker is so quick with his wordplay sometimes, you have barely digested the last joke before being hit by another one. If you are from the USA, I applaud you if you even get half of the rhymes used here. I think there's more fun to be had in listening to it and enjoying the absurdity of it, rather than trying to validate that it's legitimate cockney rhyming slang.

I bloody love rhyming slang. If it is well done it can be funnier than it should be,

`One of my favorite 2R sketches.

Of course the audience was live!

You should check Cornwall top 10 beaches

I bet this baffled your brain. 😆

Hello Joel. Have you seen these two with John Cleese doing a sketch on the class system?

And the Richard III (turd or bird) flew back to it's nest. When the man arrived home, his daughter was sitting by the Gerry Mire (fire) on her favourite Lionel Blair (chair). And she arose angrily and said "Once again you have come home elephant's trunk (drunk) and Mozart (this one is incomplete on purpose, the rhyming slang is "Mozart and Liszt" = pissed = drunk). You have spent all the money I gave you, now I cannot have my new pair of early doors (drawers, bloomers, large "granny panties"). Neither can I have wine, as you do". And the man said "fear not, here is a lady Godiva (fiver, five pound note) which I earned by a kindly act.." The woman was overjoyed, and said "Thank you father, now I can have my pair of early doors (drawers). Verily, that kindly act has ensured that I have more than enough to cover my bottle & glass (arse, ass)."

If you haven't already seen it, watch the Two Ronnies sketch, Teach Yourself Swedish..

Haha! I love The Two Ronnies! 🤣 I was watching one of their sketches the other day which is one of their finale sketches - the Hendon Symphony Orchestra sketch - absolutely brilliant! Would love to see you react to that one! 😂 This sketch is brilliant though but one which is making my brain ache trying to work out all the Cockney Rhyming Slang at the speed he is saying it LOL! I think I'll have to listen a few times to make sure I've translated it all in my mind properly! 🥴

Ah, The Two Ronnies, always good. One of my favourites is the Opticians sketch. Have a great week Joel, John in Canada

I’m from the UK and had no idea of some of the rhyming slang!

The Vicker of Dibly,Christmas dinner

I understood everything as I am a proper cockney from east London It must be hard for people from other countries as my friends from northern England can’t even understand half of it Well done keep up the good vids me old china plate

There needs to be the translation in the frame.It would be so good for those to see and enjoy the humour.

Lady Godiva is a fiver £5 note, frog & toad Road, Richard the third Turd tea leaf their, Burton on Trent rent almond rocks socks, that's all I can remember ATM, but very funny. Perked a miserable Monday.

Lol that was funny watching you trying to work out what the hell is going on. 🤣🤣Most people in the UK wouldn't have a clue.

Lol 😂😂😂 he's brilliant laughing here 😂😂😂

Joel if you haven't watched it already you must check out open all hours staring ronnie barker and David Jason who stars in only fools and horses and also still open all hours, great comedy series 👍

The essential point is that he picked up a Richard the third, that wasn't what we thought it was. Look this one up if you need to.

Cockney was developed by London Eastenders and I understand that it was to keep their conversations secret from the police.

Most of these rhyming slang terms are not proper cockney, but just made up for the sketch. In real life, people usually say only the first word. So “have a butcher’s at this” mean “look at this” (butcher’s = butcher’s hook = look).

Ronnie Barker was another great british comedy genius. The shows were recorded before a live studio audience, probably in the old Television Centre . Apart from "fork handles" My other favourite is the foreign language restaurant scene. L O L O F U N E X? S, V F X. F U N E M? 9, V F N 10E M Y? i F E 10 D M! (I think you had to be there..!) Also, try to see his very successful sitcom Porridge, set in a prison. fully ingrained in our culture!

Love the two Ronnie's. I don't think this sketch is one of there best to be honest, a lot better ones you could have chose. The optctions one is a good one were Ronnie Corbet starts to read the furniture in the room. Tommy Cooper is a good one to watch you would laugh at his just standing there doing nothing. just one of them comedians.

Good morning Joel. The thing about rhyming slang is that only the first part is spoken, when he says rubber dub he means pub, but should have just said rubber. I'm not sure about the Mozart but suspect he means Mozart and Liszt, for pissed (drunk) the actual saying is Brahms and Liszt, shortened to Brahms. To interpret it just rhyme tha last word, apples and pears = stairs, commonly said as apples as in, I'm going up the apples. George Raft = draught (breeze), trouble and strife - wife bricks and mortar = daughter. Bristol City makes no sense here because it is slang for titty (breast). The daughter needs new panties, English drawers. Dustbin lid = quid (a pound), Lady Godiva = a fiver (£5). The last one he plays around with is a Richard the third, here he uses it for bird but more commonly it means a turd.

Hi Joel glad you got most of the cockney gags 😅

ItsJps, gotta see Red Dwarf - Craig Charles was a 90s staple

Hi watching from Philippines 🇵🇭

BENIDORM!!!

The most amazing thing is that he remembered it all, unless he had an auto cue of course

Jps you should watch 'inside the tower of London ' you will learn a lot about our Queen's and King's

You have picked a hard one here me old "china" even inhabitants of the Uk will find this tough.

Anything from "Are You Being Served?" and "Mr. Bean"

Many of the rhymes he uses here are 'real' and well known examples of rhyming slang- but others are completely made up for comic effect (actually it's not always the ones you might expect that are the made up ones ). Luckily the context helps one out! It's typical of a Ronnie Barker monologue that the whole thing about the 'Richard the Third' was not at all what you were expecting it to be.

Cat and mouse just house, trouble and strife is wife, apple and pears is stairs , Richard the third is a turd lol 😂

I would like to see you react to This Country 😊

It would be interesting to see you watch some of your previous content which you didnt get at the time

You would really enjoy this if you reacted to a video on Cockney rhyming slang. All these phrases are used today. Do yourself a favour and watch it again with a list of the slang phrases. It's as relevant now as it was back then. You'll love it.

Suggest you check out 'Fairly Secret Army'.

Idea for the other channel. Australian comedic singer, Kevin Bloody Wilson.

You need to get yourself a British slang bookl 😂😂

Hi I'm in UK have a look at open all hours

hi from uk have a look at a some thing called porridge

LADY GODIVA IS A FIVER

If you haven't seen "Open All Night" with Ronnie Barker you might like to check it out.

Please react to The Brittas Empire - it’s hilarious. Great channel mate and I love your content 😄

STEWED PRUNE ... tune

I was born in England. I live in Australia. I don't understand this. Maybe my dad does..

Norman wisdom is very funny man

Now, many of you here tonight will know that Cain and Abel, and Hampstead Heath, are Cockney Rhyming Slang. Cain and Abel means table, and Hampstead Heath means teeth. We are glad to welcome tonight a large group of Cockney worshippers to Evensong, and it is to them that I wish to address my sermon. I want to tell you a story. A long time ago, in the days of the Israelites, there lived a poor man. He had no trouble & strife (wife). She had run off with a tea leaf (thief) some years before, and he now lived with his eldest bricks & mortar (daughter) Mary. And being very short of bees & honey (money), unable to pay the Burton on Trent (rent), he was tempted to go forth into the Bristol City (city) and see what he could half-inch (pinch, steal). He said to Mary, his bricks & mortar (daughter), "I will take a ball of chalk (walk) into the town, and buy some tobacco for my cherry ripe (pipe).". And he would put on his almond rocks (socks) and his dicky dirt (shirt) and his round-the-houses (trousers, pants), and set off down the frog & toad (road), until he reached the outskirts of the Bristol (city). Then people would stare at him because his dicky dirt (shirt) was torn, his how-de-doos (shoes) were full of holes, and his coat was very Westminster Abbey (shabby). He was also somewhat unclean, being too poor to purchase any Cape of Good Hope (soap), his bushel & peck (neck) was extremely two-thirty (dirty). And people passed by on the other side, to avoid the pen & ink (stink).

Please react to Peter Kay,misheard lyrics, at the dentist or any of his shows….he is the best!

Will you react to Dominion 2018 and Seaspiracy?

Do you know what "sausage me a gregory" is?

Check (Russell Howard happy hour) best bits

Love the 2 Ronnie’s This is not one of the best but still funny have a good day Joel

Turn up your mic volume!

You had no chance with that mate.

To appreciate this sketch, you really need to be familiar with Cockney rhyming slang...much of this went over my head...just like Joel!

EARLY DOORS drawers,,,,,, PANTS!1

Rippiing Yarns.

The joke is, he's a stereotypical "with it" vicar who's actually wildly out of his depth. For example he says "Bristol City" meaning "City" but it actually means "títty".

LADY GADIVER,,,,,, fiver,,, five pound note!

Joel, when is the next Livestream? I miss them and also, no drinking on the next one lol

Why haven’t you watched gimmie,gimmie,gimmie with Kathy Burke

Watch faulty towers or michael mcintyres big night out

Check out Catherine Tate do the whole of Dereck it is so funny😊😊😊😊

very difficult for someone not bought up around that slang to find this funny...I though it was hilarious

TRENT ....... rent!!

GEORGE RAFT IS DRAFT

A great Two Ronnie's is this one. Dressed as women in a choir. kzfaq.info/get/bejne/nLBmjciIvsywmnU.html

Joel! Have you a email address? 😁

BOTTLE AND GLASS,,,,,,,, arse!!

Rhyming slang is usually two main words that go together with the rhyme being on the second word. However, to make it more difficult, the second word may be omitted. Plates of meat (feet) could be shortened to plates, and Bristol City (titties-womens breasts) to Bristols

Don't worry Joel.This will confuse most modern ay British millenials,especially the Northerners,won't get it either

If you don't have a Danny it could get Lionel. It might go Pete Thong.

He's not getting it . I'm British and getting 90 % or so but still not all .

Do you take guns and assault rifles as gifts?

add or change the usual to get a complete breakdown of the meaning of the terms used in this sketch! blogDOTcockneyrhymingslangDOTcoDOTukSLASHronnie-barker-cockney-rhyming-slang-sermon-from-the-two-ronnies 👍