Are You Dating a Player?

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Are You Dating a Player?

Рет қаралды 13,299

Күн бұрын

Do you know the telltale signs of a player? And if so, do you know how to play the player who’s trying to play you? Love Advice shows you how to master the game of seduction and mental agility by playing the ONE move they never anticipated: #players #datinggames
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Relationship Expert and Bestselling Author (Allowing Magnificence, Older Women/Younger Men, and Breakup Triage) Susan Winter, writes, speaks and coaches on evolutionary forms of loving partnership and higher thinking. Media credits include: THE OPRAH SHOW, THE TODAY SHOW, GOOD MORNING AMERICA, ABC EVENING NEWS, THE LIST, CNN HEADLINE NEWS, BBC, COSMO, HARPERS BAZAAR, FORTUNE, FORBES, BUSINESS INSIDER, PEOPLE MAGAZINE, NEW YORK MAGAZINE, THE LONDON TIMES, MUMBAI MIRROR, IRISH TIMES, THE TIMES OF INDIA, and THE NEW YORK TIMES. In radio, Susan is a frequent guest on NPR, ABC, BBC, and CBS NEWS RADIO. Public speaking includes keynotes at the WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM, THE INTERNATIONAL MENTAL HEALTH FESTIVAL, and the CORE CLUB NYC. Her Podcast, 'The Susan Winter Show,' can be heard on Spotify, iHeart Radio, and Apple Music. www.susanwinter.net

Пікірлер: 73

@mst1740 2 жыл бұрын

This was painful. I am out of the situation now but I still feel the loss. It is empowering to learn that I inadvertently did the right things, which is why it ended, but it hurts to know that the feelings I thought he had for me weren't real. Excellent video. And ultimately freeing, I think. Maybe I can now accept that I lost nothing because there was nothing there to lose? Great work.

@menaakrawi24 2 жыл бұрын

I feel ur pain 😔

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

It can be very difficult to accept that it was not your fault thought it might seem counter intuitive. It absolutely gets easier and is 💯 more freeing than allowing yourself to stay in a negative cycle! I’m glad to hear you are on the right path!

@Sharon-jg9ls 2 жыл бұрын

I understand completely and have a hard time not think I did something wrong, or wasn’t I receptive enough etc….I know I didn’t but it’s so hard to think that this person truly didn’t care about me.

@flaviadzimbanhete6231 2 жыл бұрын

YES YES YES! Everything you've said in this video is so on point and 💯 true about players. I've unfortunately had my fair share of players and have found out the hard way that this guy really isn't for me, he's just lusting after me. There's nothing more powerful then knowing your worth, feeling self confident and self-love to a level where you can easily turn away a player and feel no regret, but power. You've got to know what you're worth and what you will not tolerate ladies 🙌🏾

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

So week said, Flavia! And what motivation for all that reads your comment! Knowing your worth it the key and being powerful enough to walk away is not easy but essential

@bodymindsoul60 2 жыл бұрын

Spot On!

@kate9653 Жыл бұрын

Well said Flavia!

@Jocelyn_Jade 2 жыл бұрын

Players are immoral because of the dishonesty they bring to the table. They are literally harming a lot of people’s emotions as a living.

@Powerskaty Жыл бұрын

Player sounds like to nice of a term for the harm they cause.

@sherriflemming3218 Жыл бұрын

Right. They don't age well. Once they lose their looks they have less choices. However the ones with money can still be successful at the game.

@sandrinasantos7864 2 жыл бұрын

"Intentional vulnerability, when you are powerful to do so, is a game changer.", Susan Winter 💛

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you, Sandrina! Glad you liked the video!

@lhppresents 2 жыл бұрын

Susan! Love you. I was just starting to date a playa and as soon as I realized he started to breadcrumb me I completely backed away. I ain't playing that game, no thank you. I'll find someone good for me!

@debralondon2402 Жыл бұрын

I knew right off I was dating a player which was not what I wanted but he was so handsome, charming and funny it was so hard to turn away from but I did because I could also see the extreme pain I would go through if I played that game.

@Sharon-jg9ls 2 жыл бұрын

So glad I found your videos. You are so accurate it’s crazy. It recently happened to me and he started talking about sex A LOT. I simply asked “what exactly are you looking for here?” Of course a vague answer and then started pulling back. I cut him loose by saying this was causing me more confusion than joy and I don’t do hot and cold. No response. It’s hurtful but glad I got out when my gut was screaming at me.

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

You did the right thing by getting out before you got seriously hurt. I’m glad you had the courage to ask and not just turn a blind eye! I’m proud of you!

@erinangelheart3048 2 жыл бұрын

The pony analogy is perfect! I’ve just been learning to rein my relationships now.

@YunKwokLeung 2 жыл бұрын

Dear Susan. I think I need to keep getting back to this video - there is so much wisdom stuffed into this one-hour-long video that I can feel I can get something new from it every time I re-watch it! I recently have met a player and everything you said in this video has completely captured the essence of it! This video allows me to understand what players may have in their mind and this not only takes me out of the loop of obsession with the player but also even start to feel a little bit of compassion for them. Thank you dear Susan for putting out this video - this is truly the best healing potion for someone who has gone through or is going through a situation with a player.

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Matthew! I’m so happy to hear that it helped you identify those red flags! You’re on such a good path and very soon the right person that is full of love and open will find you! I truly appreciate your comment and support! ♥️

@ellamedic8963 Жыл бұрын

my ex in a nutshell. What used to irritate me is the futurizing. I used to wonder does he realize how stupid he looks by dangling all the plans/things in front of me but never followed through? 🤷‍♀️

@noellabella05 2 жыл бұрын

“Emotional manipulation”. Hmmm if perhaps you think this is a worthy live show topic, there’s a good suggestion! Also, fear of rejection, another topic suggestion. Loveeeeee you so much. You’re too fabulous.

@debralondon2402 Жыл бұрын

I liked the part about how you loved your pony so much and wanted to be nice to your pony so you just Went wherever your pony wanted to go, you just wanted to spend time with the one you loved. Instead of leading your pony where you wanted to go. Your disposition was over nice and over loving. Can so relate to that and paid a very heavy price because of it. Sadly. I eventually learned to be mutual givers or nothing.

@annastone5624 4 ай бұрын

Vulnerability means you’ve got to like yourself enough to be able to stand up and be seen.. wow!! 💖💖💖

@SusanWinter 4 ай бұрын

Anna, it's very powerful to be direct and honest. Then vulnerability does not come off as weakness. It comes off as one's truth.

@annastone5624 4 ай бұрын

@@SusanWinter you provide such wonderful insight thank you. I realised I have been thinking I needed to be more assertive or confident. But I actually need to be more comfortable admitting I want love, a relationship.. and that that's nothing to be ashamed about and what most people want, unless they are in a different phase.

@sterneprinzessin 2 жыл бұрын

One of your greatest talks Susan - and all your talks are awesome ❤ You are showing and revealing what is behind. So helpful!

@cherbug1197 2 жыл бұрын

I love your pony story!!!😊💕

@abdulkabirabdulazeezalabi8055 2 жыл бұрын

+2348103378310⏯️⏯️⏯️⏯️ Hello it's works I can't believe am with my love again after so many years of breakup.,

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Ahhhhh. You heard the IG LIVE!! Thanks!! Toby, my fat pony.

@runningwithscissors1564 Жыл бұрын

The players I personally know display a lot of narcissistic traits.

@6drk6mrc6 11 ай бұрын

Or borderline

@pugz910 2 жыл бұрын

Its relatively simple. Dont paly me Belleview. Truth a player is only happy when they are playing, they dont really even care who they are playing with. Its a dangerous game.

@beatawlodarczyk3405 9 ай бұрын

Omg I am laughing because it feels like you are taking about me an Rob going after me ! 😂

@jazzauthor 2 жыл бұрын

You know your stuff!!!!!!!!! Go Susan!!

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Aww Debbie! Thank you for following and your nice comment!

@exposinginsanity 2 жыл бұрын

Susan...you are totally able yo be in the male mind. And you are so kind and understsnding of their methods. They are another species and you recognize we cant expect them to act the way we would ...but then again they should be held accountable when they are bad humans even if testosterone makes them angry-aggressiv-cold or whatever

@tatianaskhirtladze4584 2 жыл бұрын

Dear Susan, Im looking forward to every Thursday to your wisdom and great character! By the way, you look great in that blouse!❤️🌹🥳

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Tatiana! Thank you for taking the time to join me! Please let me know if there ever is a topic you would like me to cover!

@dangfd551 9 ай бұрын

This sounds too familiar. I must have said omg 10 times and I’m only at 17:35. Didn’t expect this when I clicked on the video. Do you think a player can be unintentional? Past trauma, psychological/personality disorder, relationship incompetence, etc. Or is it always an intentional and deliberate attempt to gain/take from another? (30:20, you even address that question here) 16:50 your speaking more clearly to my own experiences than I could! 31:10 Great video Susan

@SimbaAliaye 2 жыл бұрын

I just spent $4800 on a narc therapist trying to figure out if he was a narcissist, a player, or Asperger’s, only to figure out on my own he has avoidant attachment style. Granted the therapist help me with other stuff that came along for the ride, but I new to Munson that there was something there. Next time no therapist. I’ll just trust my gut. Now on hopelessly in love and I know he loves me too but we’re both midlife, recently divorced and it’s complicated. I broke up with him but regret it but feel he’s too avoidant to ever lean into a relationship. Nearest future tripping but I want to see action now.

@Johnny-sn2ls 2 жыл бұрын

I don't know what's happened with one girl. I saw her eye signals to me. I approached her. We started talking sometimes on her work place when I come. At once meanwhile I found out she has a boyfriend. Before my approaching I heard from her she hasn't boyfriend. She is very kind, smiling, friendly to me. Constantly she asked me something about me, what I do, what's up new in my life, very curious. This is very sweet from her. I am positively surprised.

@lordalepore 2 жыл бұрын

Learned many good things .. thanks

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

great, Lora

@alexflips393 2 жыл бұрын

Should you block your online “crush” if they cancelled meeting up with you?

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

What was the reason?

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Blocking is a strong move. Cancelling bruises the ego, but I'm not sure it deserves that depth of reaction. Better course is to consider all the circumstances. Find out if they're really interested or not.

@alexflips393 2 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much Susan. I just unfollowed so I don’t see her stories but we are still “friends”. She has an 8 month baby so that is clearly her focus. I don’t think she is interested enough because I gave too much too soon. Thank you!

@simohad2544 2 жыл бұрын

Brilliant content, thank you

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

You’re so very welcome, Simo!

@magdanovacmissouritigers6405 2 жыл бұрын

thank you for this helpful video ❤️

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

You’re welcome! Thank you for your comment!

@menaakrawi24 2 жыл бұрын

Hey Susan Thank u so much again for the live chat ❤️ I just wanted to ask are players scared of emotions ? And why ?? Hope to hear back from u 💋

@menaakrawi24 2 жыл бұрын

Also do they loose value for u when u purse them ??

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Yes. that's why they only play on the surface. As for 'why', that's deeply rooted and different for each one.

@blackdiamond393 2 жыл бұрын

I'm a Gentleman of Leisure! Not a Player. I'm not confuse. And you totally wrong about what a player is. A player is a person that is able to at ease. Play they way in or out of any predicament or sticky situation they get involved in. A players fight is fix. They don't play don't play fare. By any means necessary they have to win, in the end.

@Jazzybot 2 жыл бұрын

Players are snakes in wolfs clothing with sheep for brains and the weakest males in the game.

@sherriflemming3218 Жыл бұрын

Snakes in the grass.

@vanessamarlenesanchez2213 2 жыл бұрын

Hi Susan, very good video as always. What happens when a man stares at you, looks directly into your eyes. Several times, long enogh to catch your attention but nothing happens. He was French, I am Argentinian, whe met in Río de Janeiro. Could you speak about people at 42 starting dating again after the pandemic especially when you have a difficult personal situation (a desease, the consequences of an accident, family problems, etc)? Should we say that at once? How should we face our date about this?

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

It's a very confident and determined sign of longing and desire.

@SimbaAliaye 2 жыл бұрын

Live you❣️ Your hilarious!

@ryanhopwood1148 2 жыл бұрын

I’ve met a female player. It goes both ways but women are less to admit it when I confronted a dating partner. When your dating several men and don’t settle with your best choice(that was me) and your building a deeper connection and still talk to other men I consider you player. Why won’t she admit she’s a serial dater?????

@carolharrott3679 2 жыл бұрын

How do we and should we Walk Away with out saying anything. Do we owe them anything?

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

Every instance is different. If you do, it opens the door for an argument and for you possibly going back into a negative pattern. If you don’t, you might never feel closure. I do think you should walk away but do some true soul searching and decide the message you want to send to them. Not just an angry rebuttal. Always be the bigger person and wipe your hands clean. You’ll be surprised what a release it is. 🤗 😘 ❤️

@Sharon-jg9ls 2 жыл бұрын

I have a hard time ghosting people. I simply said “this is causing me more confusion than joy and I don’t do hot and cold. I say this with kindness and not to be rude. “

@SusanWinter 2 жыл бұрын

@@Sharon-jg9ls Good response, Sharon