Dr. Grande is an ironic name for a specialist in narcissism.

I'll refrain from commenting because nobody else could match the quality of my comment.

That NPD was pretty obvious, a covert NPD is pretty much impossible to spot in an interview. More role-play sessions please, they help a lot to put a face and body language to those lists of 'signs'

OMG! GIve that girl an Oscar! Her timing, her inflections, her facial expressions...she MUST have a narc in her life LOL!

Not all who have NPD, act like this.some know how to play it off and hide it better.

I worked with a covert narcissist in a therapy room and it is extremely painful, the anger, defensiveness, lack of awareness, extreme arrogance, competitiveness, no boundaries...- it is hard to work with someone who uses therapy just as a vehicle to prove themselves they are right. Lesson #1: how they treat other people, they will eventually treat you, the therapist.

Dr. Grande's ability to remain impartial and unbiased during this session is paramount to the therapeutic relationship. His questions were nonjudgemental and reflective of this client's feelings and cognitions. He interjected with suggestions that were still in line with the comfort level of the client but also challenged her current way of thinking. I feel that his positive regard is what allowed the client to be receptive to his suggestions and see things from a perspective other than her own.

A covert narcissist would EASILY manipulate the situation. They would be the most humble person in the world.

Kudos to the actress! I have worked with a pathological narcissist for many years, and I can testify that the actress has captured the nuances of this personality extremely well. Usually, narcissists are portrayed in movies as bombastic and pushy, but they have this quality of unperturbed aloofness with the air of misunderstood visionary, and this actress reproduced that attitude exactly. The empathy of the therapist is also something to marvel at. To empathize with a narcissist is not an easy feat.

This actress is amazing. I hated her within a few minutes, haha

A narcissist asking for help: please, help me stop being so awesome so the world can at least be at my level.

She’s very obvious but there are so many narcissists harder to spot, more subtle than her

This is why I am not a therapist... I could not remain neutral.

This made me tired simply watching her. She always comes back full circle to herself.

If everyone is mad at you, it's not them.

The client is so confident and feels like she is above all of her coworkers. Dr Grande helps her to realize that she can stop criticizing her coworkers' work performance. The client is willing to give this a try because she feels as though this will prove that she is right.

She even got the narc posture hahahaha

Low self esteem is the root cause of narcissism. I talk too a colleague daily on a professional level. The grandiose, the jealousy, the talking down is always rooted in low self esteem. Like anything in life it can be changed, however it’s changing the routine they are used too. Criticism is hard for anybody but somebody that has been acting their whole life it takes time. She diagnosed herself the whole time but the ego gets in the way.

First thing, WOW! She is really full of herself. Second thing, the counselor was able to stay focused on the underlying concern rather than the presented concern. A goal was set by the client and the counselor. It was specific, measurable, and based on what the client believed she could do, or in this case, willing to not do.

she says only her boss is on her level, yet, he's the boss and she's still his employee. narcissists really are not logical like they think they're.

Dr. Grande portrayed a wonderful example of how a client should be treated in a non judgement manner. It was also interesting to see how he was able to listen to the client and not undermine her perception of her experiences while also enlightening the client on how others may view her.

“It’s pretty hard not to make any errors in accounting. With the numbers; the AMOUNT of numbers.....”. GOLDEN

Narcissists don’t typically say these things exactly, but it’s how they come across and what they believe but they are too ashamed to admit it because they know something is wrong with them but they try to hide that

Omg, this finally confirms my former boss was indeed a narcissist. No wonder I was so traumatized from that job. I thought something was wrong with me. I have since moved on to a new job and am again working with toxic people with similar traits. No escape! These disordered robots are everywhere. The worst ones however are the ones that act like victims. The lady in this video seems tamer and like she would be easier to handle. There are way worse, manipulative ones that are fully aware of how twisted and terrible they are and like to see you suffer.

This actress did a great job demonstrating Narcissistic Personality Disorder! I noticed her lack of empathy for her employees, projecting blame, minimizing their criticism, and denying problems. This individual would be a very tough client to work with! The therapist really had his work cut out for him and he did an excellent job in getting her to a point where she could come to a conclusion on what might need to change. The constant reflection, paraphrasing, and challenging/confronting techniques allowed the client to restructure her perception of her employees and change her behaviors. It was also fascinating to see how she started therapy as a challenge to prove her boss wrong and ended up being receptive and willing to change her behaviors.

This is a good eye opener lesson for a new counselor working with a "harder" than normal client. In this session the counselor was able to not address the overbearing narcissistic personality itself and try to make the client change who they are, but instead they were able to see the personality and create avenues where the client did not have to change who they are but give ideas to take a step back to modify the personality a little. This is exactly in line with the goals of behavior therapy, the counselor will target a behavior and set goals the client can work towards. In this case the counselor gave the client the goal of toning their comments down in order to regain the flow of the employees. The counselor basically took the clients suggestion of sugar coating with the employees and sugar coated with her. Instead of telling her that her high thoughts of herself were the cause of the problems among the employees, the counselor stated a suggestion in such a way that it enabled the client to feel at ease with the goal and move forward with it.

A cocky facade to mask many underlying insecurities.

I have an anecdote to share... a sobering moment in the life of a narcissist... i was hanging out in a café with my friends. I noticed a girl in a white blazer behind my back. I saw her in a reflection of a store window. For some reason she caught my attention and it was bothering me. I kept throwing brief peeks at her image, and spent an entire evening thinking what a dork she is... simple, unkempt, just beneath presentable looking girl. It was all done in comparison, i used her to boost my confidence. When it was time to leave, i turned around to see her directly. To my astonishment and just sheer confution i realized that nobody was sitting behind our table at all, and i was looking into my own reflection mirrored from different angles of the windows from across the promenade that we were at. It was one deeply sobering moment for me that impacted my outlook, compassion and understanding of myself and people around me.. on many levels. I grew up. This experience helps me understand that people can confuse confidence with insecurity. Even though these two are the opposites with apparent distinguishing features, narcissists have the ability to experience confidence by using environment to prove it. Real confidence is when you dont need to outshine, outsmart, outloud, outstand, out...something We can help people who struggle with feelings of needing to outstand at the cost of others, by understanding a concept of real confidence and cohabitat in peace with them.. we all get episodes of narcissism when we allow situations turn into conflicts. That's the painful truth, otherwise we would be compassionate with narcissists. I know my ideas will upset people here, so i apologize for that and invite everyone to just consider it.. that's how i see things, i havent experienced any worse to know any better. And it's probably not needed.. but there.. just a voice

The counselor did a great job in remaining calm and neutral throughout this session. I believe this is a tough client to work with in the sense that she did not intentionally come into counseling for help, but to prove others wrong in their opinions of her. The counselor was willing to provide an outlook on the antecedents and the consequences of the client's situation with her coworkers, and proceeded to try to encourage ways that the client could better her relationships with those in her workplace.

This is brilliant 😂 she's the female version of 2 dudes I've met, a female boss I had, or two or three, or four...when they're really struggling to let in any criticism of themselves, they get this 😳 look on their faces, like they go there, then immediately retreat back to blaming everyone else cos they are just perfect. This is a great video, well funny x

I thought the counselor did an excellent job as remaining neutral during this counseling session. There were certain times throughout this role play video that I had a difficult time trying to remain neutral. I believe the counselor did an excellent job with demonstrating behavioral techniques with the client. The counselor assisted the client with goal setting in order to make sure the goal was specific and measureable.

I would love to see a video on how someone with autism could be misdiagnosed as someone with NPD.

Dr.Grande you were so patient with the client. Engaging with her from her perspective was advantageous, and probably made her comfortable in the session. Asking her "What do you think needs to be fixed?", "Do you think there are any steps...?" seemed to make her feel in control and apart of her session. I think that will make her homework worth doing. Thank you for the video.

Dr. Grande, you continue to amaze me!

Last 2 jobs..... had her as a boss. God this is so cathartic.

I really admire Dr. Grande’s approach when working with an individual who displays symptoms of narcissistic behavior, as I can imagine it can be quite challenging. It is clear that Dr. Grande focused the conversation around the client's behavior by asking specific questions pertaining to the client’s behavior towards her coworkers and the situation as a whole, such as questioning the client about what she can do to reduce the tension between her and her coworkers. By focusing on the client’s behavior, Dr. Grande was able to work with the client to determine specific goals or ways to alleviate the conflict between the client and her coworkers. While working with an individual who sees no fault in her behaviors, I find that Dr. Grande did a great job in demonstrating how to work effectively with such an individual, while remaining neutral towards the situation and behaviors being displayed.

Dr. Grande- I enjoyed your entire body language when talking to this client. Throughout this entire session, you were challenging the client but in an empathetic way. The open ended questions allowed the client to think about what was going on within her, she still believed that everyone was wrong and she was right; complete narcissistic behavior. The question's such as "would that help you," the client responses was able to think about what would change in the relationships, to "make the company better." You stated that your desire for the company to improve and their discontent to the comments that you make. You were able to validate her concerns, created new steps to reduce the tension and were able to suggest for the client to use cool down techniques.

I like how Dr. Grande adeptly used the client's frame of thinking/understanding to allow her to develop specific goals and strategies that she could use to better her difficulties at work. For someone who began the session completely without blame with reference to interpersonal difficulties, Dr. Grande was able to "flip the script" while maintaining complete empathy and positive regard toward the client, allowing the client to identify specific behaviors which she could work on to better the situation.

My main thought watching this vid? They put up with her for 15 years?

I know how she feels to be honest. It would be hard for colleagues to reach my level of awesomeness in the office.

This example was extremely helpful for me to get an idea of symptoms in a direct experience with a person with NPD. Thank you very much for this one Dr Grande.

I found this video very helpful in that the counselor really saw the issue from the client's perspective. He did not push her to try to see it from other's perspectives. When it came to setting behavioral goals with the client he put the client in control and therefore take ownership and find her own reasons why the behavior change would work for her.

Loved seeing this type of counceling in action. I’ve read about the modality and learned a lot by watching you.

Hats off to Dr. Grande! When I first started watching I was curious as to how this session would play out because the client did not see any need for change in her ways. I think that by being patient with the client and allowing her to propose the idea of how to approach things in a more beneficial manner was very helpful.

This channel has really been my saviour, especially am a psychologists student first year 😊😊😊

This is terrific, and insightful content!

Thank you Dr.Grande very informative as usual. Countertransperance between the client and the therapist was excellent your body language is inviting and none threatening great session.👏

This is another successful video portraying an interesting therapy. I enjoy seeing the therapy placed into action, and having a great example/ visual of how it is supposed to be applied in a counseling session.

Dr. Grande did a great job illustrating what it means to be non-judge mental and having positive intentions for the client even if you are not in agreement with their thoughts. This makes it clear what narcissistic personalities can look like. He did not compromise her quality of care regardless of what his personal views were.

Dr. Grande utilizes Behavioral Therapy in this session well while working with a client that may seem hard to deal with. Even so, Dr. Grande uses a neutral tone and does not appear to get emotional at any point which is awesome. I also thought the client did such a great job in exhibiting the behaviors of someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I can appreciate the way Dr. Grande handled this client. I imagine it is not an easy task to work with a narcissist. However, the session went smoothly and the client was advised to try something new, keeping her comments to herself. Nice work.

I'm late to the party but...very helpful to see the different traits in conversation. Thanks for making this series.

The client's acting skills were superb. If anyone was ever confused about Narcissistic Personality Disorder, they should watch this video to grasp a better understanding. From a counseling view, Dr. Grande handles this session very well. The client feels that her coworkers are wrong and that she's not the problem. Throughout the session, Dr. Grande confronts her with challenging questions that guide her thinking in order to prove her case that everyone else is the problem. He even offers her a few suggestions in efforts to keep peace at the workplace. However, the client's goal is to still prove her point.

An overt narc. Much easier to deal with than the covert variety. (yeah, I know she was acting). A covert would have given no signals and would be hard to reproach. A covert would have said all the right things. And the therapist would be none the wiser not actually knowing the person or the situation or circumstances. I know cocky overt narcs like this exist. But even an overt narc when cornered will modify their behaviour somewhat. I get that this was for 'display' purposes. People like this really do exist. Some of them really are that obvious. But the chances of getting one just like this in a clinical setting and behaving this way? I'd say that would be a minimal use case scenario. Massive fan of Dr. Grande though. Very under-rated. This kind of role-playing thing is still very intriguing though. I could see it maybe being used in a setting where a victim of a narc acts out the problems they have been having with the narc, in a kind of projection-reversal scenario. But that's probably getting too deep. Good work all the same.

Dr Grande is doing a great job assisting the client through this counseling session as she has the idea that there is nothing better than her at her job and she wants the other to do better but the way that she is vocalizing is causing issues in the company. Dr Grande presents confrontational questions to get the client to alter her way of thinking and seeing things from others point of view.

I would like to see the next few sessions. Knowing that NPD is caused by devopmental trauma that she Might agree to work on, when would you begin to ask questions about her early childhood? Is there a way to get them to address their emotional incompetence perhaps by discussing their awful parent/s/abusive home life? The gentle approach you are using is very clever. She has agreed to mind her interactions and come back in. That is major for this type of person. But do you ever get to dig in more? How do you do that? Will they ever be able to acknowledge the injury that caused them to have trouble empathizing with others and work on it? This client has an Ivy League education (as oft stated). Could psychoeducation be effective?

The actress played the role incredibly well. Kudos to her 👏👏

What a really brilliant person in that position would do: Get out of there. Change jobs or start your own company. Level up. If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room. What Narcs do: Thinking they're brilliant but stay put nonetheless. They like being the smart one (no matter if they truly are) and enjoy the drama. Also changing the environment, working with really talented people might damage their fragile egos.

Doc, PLEASE do more of these!! So helpful!

counseling someone with such a narcissistic attitude looks like it can present some challenges and appears that it could be intimidating at first. However, i feel that this was a good example of remaining neutral and trying to still be totally for the client. it was good to see some progress throughout the session despite knowing that the client did not see any issues with themselves at first.

First of all-That girl can act! She did a good job of portraying a person with narcissistic traits. Dr. Grande did an excellent job of re-framing her reasons for being in therapy in a way that doesn't completely shut her down but also doesn't play into her arrogance. For instance by suggesting that getting along with her co-workers would be beneficial to her. Then he was able to target specific behaviors such as her offering feedback to her co-workers. He also presented very non threatening to her especially when he asked if certain alternate behaviors would work. Awesome role play!

I like the neutrality that Dr. Grande maintained when working with this client because a client with narcissistic personality disorder seems difficult to work with and could bring up a bias in a counselor. Dr. Grande showed no signs of being bias because he was understanding of the client's position and remained empathetic to help the client even though she was only there to prove her boss wrong. In the end, they came to an agreement on something for the client to try to adjust her behavior which was laying low and not saying so much to her coworkers, and this could shape a positive reinforcement if things improve within the client's work relationships.

This was a very interesting video. I imagine it is very hard to work with a client with this type of mindset. How can you fix something when they don't think there is anything wrong? It was difficult to get her to admit that there is something to improve. She finally acknowledged that the relationship between herself and the coworkers has room for improvement. One way she decided to do this was to stop comparing their work to her own. This certainly doesn't change her thoughts, but might improve her behavior and allow her to come off as less arrogant.There are definitely a lot of things you want to say to her, but Dr. Grande did a good job at holding back.

It is amazing to see just how important attending, non-judgment, and use of basic listening skills are. They may seem simple, but they come a long way and are the base for any counseling relationship. First, Dr. Grande uses a non-judgmental attitude to help this client, I think that a person with this disorder may be difficult to deal with, so maintaining a non-judgmental attitude is essential. Dr. Grande's use of probing questions, interpretation, paraphrasing were necessary in helping the client see the many different behaviors she exhibited and came to awareness of how her work relationships could improve. Additionally, we begin to see how this type of therapy helped the client being to tether herself to reality and the present and how she exhibits herself around her work mates.

In this session, the counselor was adamant that there was nothing wrong with her and that she had to prove her boss wrong for sending her to counseling. She says she wants the company to improve but she isn't wanting to go about it in the best way possible. I think that Dr.Grande is doing a great job by asking her questions, like "Do you think there are any steps you can take to reduce the tension in those relationships?". I found those questions to be excellent for this client because it allows her to see other's points of view and perhaps change her behavior. By asking these questions it gave the client a goal to work towards and to see if she is able to change her behavior. Although, throughout the session, it was clear that the client's narcissistic personality disorder is hindering her from being able to recognize flaws in her own behavior.

If this were a real life situation, I'd honestly be surprised that a narcissist would go into counseling at all, even to "disprove a point" against someone else. I mean, most narcs would never set foot in a counseling clinic. Are you kidding? They avoid it like the plague! LOL Now that said, I am aware that some narcs have gone to counseling to do things like this or pretend to change to stay in their victims' lives, I get that, but it just shocks me whenever I hear of a narc going into a counseling office for any reason. Usually, they're the ones who say they don't need counseling, they don't need to bother in such trivial matters, so they don't look into it. I literally had a narc cousin tell me, in the most defensive and insecure voice possible, "I don't need counseling!" to tell me in other words that the way our "relationship" would improve would have to be all on me. If this actress were a real narcissist, I'd like to see a sequel session where this therapist gets to interview her employer and coworkers. Especially if they've suffered with her for 15 years. That would be so much fun. LOL

Great job dr. Grande. Please kindly have an example of a therapy session with pathological/ malignant NPD husband, with different types: covert, overt and overt/covert... and with varying reactions. Thank you so much for doing a great task with the other doctors in this most dangerous mental disorder.

There were a couple different components I liked about this video. First of all, I can only imagine how difficult it might be to work with an individual with narcissistic personality disorder and attempt to highlight their own erroneous behavior. Dr. Grande did a great job of staying firm when it came to pointing out the reasons why she was referred to counseling, but also listening to her and validating her own feelings surrounding the issue. He said things like, "do you think you could do that" rather than just directing her what to do which I am sure she would not be responsive towards. Dr. Grande also subtly suggested different behavioral modification the client could employ, and made them sound more appealing by highlighting some of the potential benefits (i.e. having a better relationship with one's coworkers).

I give Dr. Grande such props for maintaining the utmost professionalism and neutrality while working with this client! The paraphrasing and challenging incongruencies that Dr. Grande was doing were excellent and really seemed to help the client understand why she was there as well as address the relationships that she has with her coworkers. Likewise, the questions he was asking was appropriate to best understand the client's feelings of why she believes her coworkers are not “on her level.” As a whole, Dr. Grande did just enough probing that he was finally able to get the client to recognize (ever so slightly) where her issue may lie as well as a way to help find peace in her work environment.

The client does not appear ready to change or even able to admit that she may even have a problem while at work. Even with coming to counseling she has to right, so she comes to counseling in order to prove that she is a perfect employee. It is very apparent that the client thinks she is better than most people except her boss, who seen as "above her ". Dr. Grande did a good job helping the client realize that she may need to adjust how she is talking to other co-workers in order for the work place to run smoothly.

Yes, another one of these showing a covert Narc would be great! They are super sneaky...

So difficult to act like that when u r an actor! Congrats. A relative of mine is exactly like that unfortunately.

All due respect, Doctor, but that is hilarious. 😂 Job well done.

Dr.Grande you are awesome. Thanks a lot for your educational videos.

Excellent presentation. It is very important not to criticize a patient with this thinking pattern. I loved the way in which Dr. Todd navigated this interaction. Thank you

sadly my family would find all these behaviors normal

She acts perfectly as a narc girl. Thank you both ❤

my narc is more cunning than this

It's Angela from "The Office"

I love this lady’s accent :)

She's playing a joke it's hilarious. But guys don't get played into the "us vs them" that as humans we tend to do. We're all flawed, we're not above of these people with disorders. Doc in the video is having the right mindset.

This is an wonderful example of a therapist remaining open-minded. With the client having NPD, the therapist was able to approach the client with using behavior therapy techniques. I am not sure if this client is ready to change her behavior, or even accept that she issues to work on. It must be really hard for the therapist to work with someone with this dx.

Dr Grande you have the patience of a Saint!

Dr. Grande did an excellent job in remaining neutral during this session. I can see how difficult it would be to work with someone who is presenting with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. She clearly did not see any issues with her behaviors and the session proved that. There was a struggle in establishing a target behavior to focus on, but I liked how Dr. Grande was able to pull from information she provided in the session to help the client establish a target behavior that she could agree to work on (refraining from commenting on co-workers performance). I am curious, how would future sessions look with this client? Would it continue to be more of the same with regard to her not finding any fault in her own behaviors?

GREAT job, you two. :) very good tips here! ty

Oh geez. This just confirmed all doubts I had in my head about my ex. How did I ever go along with this.

She did this soo well x

The question I would ask her is "What are the things in your life that bring you joy?" because she seems pretty joyless. I have a hunch that this focus would help her to lower her guard.

So helpful as a LPC-IT that finds this to be an therapeutically intimating and activating population to work with!

I haven"t seen this before!Excellent portrayal. Great to see you work with a client, Dr. Grande.

oh wow!! THAT was insufferable! And a really excellent role play ! Wow... that was really good.

It was fascinating to watch this session. Dr. Grande got the client to agree to stop making comments about coworkers, and the client left feeling as though they would be proved right. It would be interesting to see what would happen in the next session, and if the client's perception was changed if her plan to let others point out coworker incompetence did not occur, or if she would find another excuse for why it did not happen the way she thought it would.

Thank you for your education.

I feel that such things happen in the workplace irrespective of the person being a narcissist. I saw it happening with two of my colleagues and recently with me. Targetted workplace politics can drag you into thinking that you are the problematic person rather than others. It is not even about competence. It is more about workload, discrimination, and xenophobia as well in an intercultural setup.

Real talk, I've been told I have this issue. I don't feel like I sound anything like she does, but I can definitely think of examples in the past where I have said something like I care more about safety than anybody else. As just an example. My life is getting flipped upside down on its head right now potentially and supposedly because of this. I'm planning to talk to a therapist about it. But I just want to say one of the most nefarious things about this disorder is that it's very difficult to see that it's a disorder when it's so hard for you to look at yourself objectively and honestly. It's like having a cancer that spreads through your whole body without you ever noticing any sign of anything wrong at all. I feel like I need lots of prayer and I don't know who I am anymore. I honestly don't know why I'm just throwing this out into the KZfaq comment world but I don't feel like I have anybody else to talk to. It could be the main reason I don't have any long-lasting friendships is I'm too caught up in myself to ever invest in the friendship. It is Despicable that this is a way we can be as humans and I am anxious to start dealing with it and make my way towards the other side of it in a healthy and meaningful way. It's so bad that I don't know if I've ever actually cared about anybody the way you're supposed to. It's terrible for me to say it out loud and consider it but I might have only ever been in relationships with people because of how they benefit me. That's not who I want to be in my heart but it's starting to seem like that's who I am. I also take time to help people with things when I'd rather do something else but I just literally don't know anything about anything I feel like anymore.

Omg .....this is what my narc ex said about her colleagues after they refused to work with her.

The interesting thing is that everything she is saying is actually a projection of her self. She THINKS she is better than her coworkers but in reality she FEELS like she is below them which is why she is constantly putting them down and being condescending; so that she can feel better about her low-self-worth.

In the role play, Dr. Grande demonstrated assessing the client through an initial behavioral interview and functional analysis. It was clear that he was aiming to understand the presenting problem through behavioral terms by obtaining very specific information regarding the client's target behavior. This is evidenced by questions such as "what if anything do you think needs to be fixed here?' and "how long has this been an issue for you?". Dr. Grande assisted the client identifying specific and measurable ways to dissolve conflict with her coworkers, ultimately setting manageable goals while better understanding the antecedents and consequences of her behavior. The client in this role play displayed a high sense of self-efficacy which most likely originated from continued past success and praise from others. Dr. Grande showed a great way of working with the client's high expectations of self and others to ultimately strengthen the therapeutic relationship and promote positive change towards discussed goals.

I like the way Dr. Grande guides the client into figuring out what she could do to reduce the tension in the relationships she has at work even though it is very difficult for her to see any error in her viewpoints. I find it interesting that he is not trying to change the narcissist's personality but focusing more on the current issue at hand which is the difficulty that she is having at work. I appreciated his guidance for the client because it allowed her in her "brilliance" to make a decision that would work for those around and as well as herself. He is completely non-judgemental with the client which maintains the relationship and guides it towards a resolution. Pretty cool!

Will they really just blatantly admit how great they think they are, like that? She sounds like she's delusional. Don't real narcissist at least try to hide the fact that they believe they're better than everyone else and pretend they're normal so people won't catch on to what they really are? Don't they at least try to put on that they know how to be humble?