BERTCAST

Рет қаралды 788,954

7 жыл бұрын

Comedians Dave Attell & Tom Segura join me in the Mancave to talk about joke writers, Doug Stanhope, internet sensations, alternative comedians, booze, his album Skanks for the Memories, & how Political Correctness is ruining comedy.
To get my book “Life of the Party” click HERE: www.amazon.com/Life-Party-Sto...
For all TOUR DATE & MERCH click HERE: www.bertbertbert.com
To Follow me on..
Twitter: / bertkreischer
Facebook: / bertkreischer
Instagram: bertkreisch...
KZfaq: / akreischer
This episode is brought to you by Blue Apron to get THREE FREE MEALS w/ Free Shipping go to www.blueapron.com/bertcast

Пікірлер: 1 200

@r.e.8809 7 жыл бұрын

At least blink when you say it. Dave is one of the best of all time

@davidperez5089 2 жыл бұрын

Recognized some psychopathy in Tom!🤣🤣

@sumo-ninja 2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely and the reason you quote this line is because it's the first one that reaches out and grabs you and it's also the only one you can remember because he does so many random funny ass lines that you can't keep track of them past this one LOL I almost commented it myself

@vincentmorrelli3025 2 жыл бұрын

HE IS the best of all time

@stgeorgethepurist8311 2 жыл бұрын

I died at that line

@DrSnook 2 жыл бұрын

Stanhope rates him as one of the best. I think he's THE comedians comedian.

@brianmclean8732 7 жыл бұрын

Attell is steam rolling. Dropping wisdom and insults without slowing to breath.

@polybiusnymb6446 3 жыл бұрын

@Friendly Neighborhood Rottweiler “I can’t breath” - Foreman Mayweather

@charlescollins2440 2 жыл бұрын

I'm pretty sure it's breathe... Sorry

@notbadforanoob8725 Жыл бұрын

*BREATHE.

@brbenedi 7 жыл бұрын

This should be called "Dave Attell does a private show for Tom Segura and ME"

@youtubedrifter5594 5 жыл бұрын

brbenedi: Pretty fucking much

@anthonyc7127 5 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell is the 5/12/1974 Playing the in Band of stand up comedians

@herbythechef7624 5 жыл бұрын

Lol at the playing in the band reference

@jwix8653 5 жыл бұрын

It should be called chicken in the background

@rustyshackleford353 5 жыл бұрын

Lol

@stevenburrito7032 5 жыл бұрын

Dave made ridiculous residuals from his TV show, which comedy central aired like 6 hours a night for ten years. He is worth more than Segura and Bert put together (not exaggerating). He lives his life in NYC playing the clubs there and is a very private person. No one should feel bad for him for not being social media or youtube famous. Dude is a legend.

@octavio801 3 жыл бұрын

wow i didnt know that.. i assumed he was over looked and didnt make alot of money

@brutalbasspro 3 жыл бұрын

Hes definitely not hurting, but he's not worth more than Tom Segura.

@stevenburrito7032 3 жыл бұрын

@@brutalbasspro You would be surprised. He was in on the ground floor of 90's comedy central money. He most definitely is worth much more than Segura. Syndication Television in the 90's was bananas. The deals they wrote were with the idea that TV would last forever.

@DanielLopez-fj9yz 3 жыл бұрын

I don’t feel bad for him I’m glad he’s a hidden treasure that true comedy heads know he is there and doesn’t get exploited

@normitos 3 жыл бұрын

@@stevenburrito7032 Segura is worth 12 and Attell is worth 8. I like Attell better, but it took Attell 30 years to get there and Segura 15.

@crumbb_m 7 жыл бұрын

I'm 30 minutes in and feel no remorse for all of the chickens I've consumed in my life.

@dalianmoya 7 жыл бұрын

Crumb Bum Chicken nuggets Kon Queso

@jessicabaker7318 5 жыл бұрын

30:37 chicken ends

@briancondon1441 5 жыл бұрын

luv u@@jessicabaker7318

@dolphin069 5 жыл бұрын

Thought I was hallucinating. Fucking chickens.

@CandymanSays 4 жыл бұрын

Bert totally missed the opportunity to brand this the #CockBlockCast for all the chicken noises I can hear over Dave.

@sammythefrog7480 7 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell is a national treasure. God Damn this dudes funny, on or off stage. JRE needs to get him back asap. He needs to be more famous than he already is man.

@allydawes307 7 жыл бұрын

Sam YI they call him the comic's comic

@narcoskeptic 7 жыл бұрын

TRAV yeah I've heard a few comics like Stanhope etc talk about Attell and say hes super self critical and thinks he's not funny yet every comic tries to get to his level

@louzer2566 7 жыл бұрын

Sam YI Dave needs to get an agent. How tf has he not been to Australia or England?? He's a fucking legend and kills all these younger generation comics.

@AngryJT 7 жыл бұрын

Saw Dave back in May and it was the best night of my sad life. Been my favourite comedian for over 20 years.

@acetate909 6 жыл бұрын

Anyone remember Insomniac? Attells comedy central show. Anyway, some comics will only attain a certain level of fame no matter how funny they are. Dave has very little acting ambition, he has a very dirty act, hes not active on social media, hes over 50, while any one of those things may not mean much individually, taken all together it's not surprising that he's not as popular as many lesser comics.

@sudheendray4990 5 жыл бұрын

I'm a vegetarian and I started eating chicken 30 minutes into this podcast.

@Downs-Indroam Жыл бұрын

Hahaha

@FretMillen10 7 жыл бұрын

I miss "Insomnia w/ Dave attell" playing allnight long on Comedy central

@kirstiemcfeatters4348 6 жыл бұрын

Fret Millen *insomniac. A great show.

@ryanzuhlke9852 5 жыл бұрын

I can hear the theme song playing in my head

@joeo5533 5 жыл бұрын

They're on youtube

@JediMindTrix420 5 жыл бұрын

I just ordered the best of Insomniac uncensored last week lol. Watched the first volume already. I really missed that show.

@bobbyludlam2475 5 жыл бұрын

The beginning of the end for me. those shows turned me into a late night laugh junky.!!!

@nickdambrosio7622 7 жыл бұрын

watching Bert get trolled by his chickens in front of his hero. Priceless.

@prolefeed4442 7 жыл бұрын

"It's called Twitcher"

@PowuhToSeven 5 жыл бұрын

When your dad tries to sound "hip"

@lordsmokingmirror 5 жыл бұрын

Well at least he takes an interest.

@divinedriftofficial 4 жыл бұрын

Twitcher is someone on twitch. Probably going that direction.

@dknox90803 4 жыл бұрын

Michael J. Fox Comedy is called Twitcher.

@DeltaTempest 4 жыл бұрын

Most boomerous quote from him hands down

@SunriseMMA 7 жыл бұрын

Bert Kreischer Please Cook That Chicken.

@Edgun99a 5 жыл бұрын

"at least blink when you say it" lmao

@bloodydecks5279 7 жыл бұрын

Dust bunny under the table is killing me

@vision7832 7 жыл бұрын

lol way to drag me into that. Didn't notice it, now i cant go back..

@dr.binjohnson7776 7 жыл бұрын

Bloody Decks i read your comment at 5 min in, I hope you get fisted. Thats all i see now

@bloodydecks5279 7 жыл бұрын

Dr. Bin Johnson heh every bertcast from now on you will think of fisting me! I'm in your head now forever. Embrace it dr BJ

@gerardwhytelads 7 жыл бұрын

Fuck I read this 40 seconds in

@elyeyi369 7 жыл бұрын

Bloody Decks fuck I know what you mean bro. I just wanna take a fat shit on berts coffee table to distract everyone from it

@derekmoe7191 6 жыл бұрын

Tom looks like he is taking a Thanksgiving dad nap through most of this

@bevrosity 5 жыл бұрын

before he got fit

@lennyb.k.8885 4 жыл бұрын

Tim listens to people talk.

@jamesmelton9325 2 жыл бұрын

Is he the one doing all the heavy dad breathing into the mic?

@Roman.Bolanski 6 жыл бұрын

Attell is the funniest man alive. You could actually put together a whole comedy album with just him talking on different podcasts and interviews.

@HarveyGrass 7 жыл бұрын

maybe next time you have a great comedian over get more farm animals.

@thecrowseye5384 7 жыл бұрын

harvey grass Lmfao right. Only thing this Podcast needed was more cowbells.

@zackklein2225 7 жыл бұрын

Thaha haha

@willt9932 6 жыл бұрын

no shit, that was driving me nuts

@TheAlpineShepherdBoy 6 жыл бұрын

harvey grass hey man, Joe has chickens so he needs chickens too! Let's just gloss over the fact he thought it was a good idea to have his studio feet away from his chicken coup.

@Ibelieveindoubt 5 жыл бұрын

Holy shit. Just laughed so violently at this I started doing that thing where you're seemingly choking on air and being able to breathe becomes a legitimate concern for a few seconds.

@dogdaybreak3157 7 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell: "I wouldn't say I'm a great comic." Wrong. I've been a fan of Dave since he started (had hair). He's the best stand up of all time IMO. You can tell why. He's naturally funny as hell with a quick wit without being annoying in the slightest.

@DrDANKize 7 жыл бұрын

This podcast with Dave, Bert, Tom and berts chickens was great! The chickens really had some valid points!

@brandonridgely3775 5 жыл бұрын

"Cool, at least blink when you say it" set the tone for Attell's performance

@whenimbored4825 2 жыл бұрын

That piece of dust under the coffee table really shined in this episode. For real though, I love me some Dave Attell.

@mothercusser9882 2 жыл бұрын

Totally watched the dust as well!

@joaquinvargas3915 3 жыл бұрын

Atell is the funniest person in conversation probably ever. I've seen multiple clips of him with other really funny comics in a conversational setting and he just destroys them. Like here, he gets all of them laughing their asses off. He's so much funnier then everyone else in any room.

@TheDrewManGroup 7 жыл бұрын

I haven't smoked in over 5 years, and watching Dave light one up every few minutes is killing me....

@MCandela922 5 жыл бұрын

I have about 2 and a half years without them and not going to lie he made me want one haha.

@wilsondukeoflizards 5 жыл бұрын

Me too! I quit about two years ago and Dave had me fantasizing about buying a pack.

@divinedriftofficial 4 жыл бұрын

Cuz your WEAK

@smokyclap6033 2 жыл бұрын

Dude, I literally tried to quit today cold turkey and had the same reaction when I saw him light up. Now I don’t know if I’ll make it through the day.

@cestjane2260 2 жыл бұрын

12 years, and I think about it everyday, but it’s been a while since I’ve seen a smoker for such a long period of time.

@IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI 7 жыл бұрын

"3 Confederate Generals" LMFAO, fuckin Dave😂

@r.m.8970 2 жыл бұрын

If you ever wanted to choke a chicken, listen to this podcast, lol. Love you Bert! I started watching comedy at a young age, falling asleep to "Insomniac" in the living room at 1AM when my parents let me. Listening to Attell talk shop and(softly) roast you two has been so satisfying! Please have him on again if you haven't! The "At least blink when you say it" is honestly the hardest I've laughed at a podcast in a while, an absolute murderer.

@bensimmons4419 7 жыл бұрын

I like how Attell is ripping on both Tom and Bert's style right front of them xD.

@michaelwtapp 5 жыл бұрын

I think Tom takes after Louie more than Attell

@steamedyam 2 жыл бұрын

@@michaelwtapp Tom and Burnt Krueger are both emulating Louie’s style of say something utterly awful and have you laughing by the end. They both have said they used that as their main source of inspiration

@jrrojas1331 2 жыл бұрын

What time in video do they??

@Downs-Indroam Жыл бұрын

@@jrrojas1331 What time in the video do they what? When Attell rips on them? You didnt watch it?

@stoehr 7 жыл бұрын

Absolutely right, Bert...Bill and Atell are two guys that have me in tears every time. So many good comedians out there (yourself and Segura included)...but Atell, Burr, O'Niel...absolute legends.

@puddintaine4556 7 жыл бұрын

I need another Dave Attell special...

@skylarmany2648 2 жыл бұрын

3 of the funniest people alive in the same room, amazing I love Dave's blunt humor is he is truly one of the greatest of all time!

@DJFullHam 2 жыл бұрын

dave attell was my first celebrity run in ever in my life. I was waiting in line to go to the comedy cellar and he came up to me and said "hey buddy, let me see your light" bc i was smoking. I said yes sir and then he made me laugh for the first ten minutes and i told everyone me and dave are bffs moving forward. :)

@goat_horde 5 жыл бұрын

Thank you Dave! Always so modest about the huge impact you have on comedy

@dylanbingham4997 4 жыл бұрын

Mad respect for Dave, especially coming from Bert and Tom. It’s great to see comics being supportive for each other’s own art.

@iloveryangreasley6172 6 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell made fun of my hair during a set once, it was amazing.

@sponkmcdonk3898 2 жыл бұрын

look at the level of respect they have for attell, it’s refreshing

@JoeMACofNAC 3 жыл бұрын

Dave is the comic ambassador. He pays tribute to comics like no other.

@monster0033 6 жыл бұрын

Love it! Dave kills it on here! Such a great comic! He get's honest laughs from the crowd for sure !!!

@hasseaouled6032 5 жыл бұрын

How can anyone be that naturally funny, quick and sharp? Dave, Robert Smigel, Dave Chappelle and a few other guys are in that tiny category.

@LiquidDaylight 5 жыл бұрын

If only Tom was on time for the sound check.

@fabiosacchi9305 7 жыл бұрын

Attell should have his own Podcast, funniest man alive

@chaykuh 2 жыл бұрын

Also possibly the laziest comic alive. Still waiting on one but don't see it happening.

@mothercusser9882 2 жыл бұрын

@@chaykuh laziest? Dude is constantly working on stuff.

@tachibanamei6647 7 ай бұрын

@@mothercusser9882constantly still working everyday on things

@BrionSalazar 7 жыл бұрын

I always feel vindicated for my love of Attell when he is around other comics and they show such love and respect for him. I've been a fan of his for a long time and was always surprised he wasn't a bigger name. So funny. So smart. So fearless.

@frankylopez3510 7 жыл бұрын

I dig comedy. Dave, you're on my all time favorites. I've bumped into you several times outside of the Cellar. You're one of the best...

@davekoffee2034 2 жыл бұрын

29:42 Bert: “That’s the really big thing right now. It’s called ‘Twitcher’ and they play video games…” 😂

@JackofTrades21 2 жыл бұрын

XQC L

@AnnnaPotocka 3 жыл бұрын

"I wouldn't say I'm a great comic" said Dave Attell - literally the funniest person on the face of the earth.

@gabby_moloko 2 жыл бұрын

Couldnt get enough. I could listen to dave talk about comedy for hours. I listened to his wtf with maron, and cant believe how much more giving he is here talking to burt and tom.

@pjmusc1001 5 жыл бұрын

Went to watch my buddy perform at the Throckmorton in Mill Valley, and Nick Griffin was headlining. Hanging in the green room, told him I was a fan from his old CC half-hour, he was the absolute nicest guy. Glad to hear him get a shoutout here.

@gdownie1332 2 жыл бұрын

"Are you ready to start a production company?" As he walks off barefoot to tend to the chicken coop.

@brent4138 6 жыл бұрын

3 Confederate generals....lmao

@joshuadelacruz2953 2 жыл бұрын

“Pick a lemon and make a wish” 😂

@staceymarie6895 4 жыл бұрын

Love these guys. Old podcast but timeless, Dave Attell is the best.

@elbeetlebeasto 5 жыл бұрын

"This new thing called Twitcher"........ Burnt Chrysler at the forefront of tech news lol

@nomararevir2170 7 жыл бұрын

Dave Atel is the best!! I've seen him so many times n he wrecks every time! this was a great podcast

@Chibason 2 жыл бұрын

I was following the comedy scene pretty heavy when Dave started popping up. Always loved his sets, and appearances. Great comic

@louispartida3505 2 жыл бұрын

Even after he closed the door, you can still hear the freaking chickens! LOL Hilarious

@dannykingston6495 7 жыл бұрын

3 confederate generals....classic. Attell is a fucking master. Killer podcast, BertKreischer.

@zackklein2225 7 жыл бұрын

The Chicken is heckling them. (:

@joeyjohnston1209 4 жыл бұрын

Hey Bert I have been watching you for a super long time and I haven’t ever seen you but you give me like that family yells shut up laugh but you sense of humor is my sense of humor and I love you. you brighten many people’s day

@dover5005 2 жыл бұрын

Saw Dave in person last night in Tacoma. He was a Legend. Makes ya just want to hear more from him. Here I am watching a 4 year old Pod. Great trio here. Saw Tom in Seattle few months back. My favs.

@TalkingThrones 6 жыл бұрын

Why doesn't Dave have his own Podcast? He is missing out on another big revenue stream for himself. It could easily be one of the top Comedy Podcasts..

@WEF2030SLAVE 3 жыл бұрын

AGREED

@jeffbettencourt6263 3 жыл бұрын

Not his style. Old school and true to his roots.

@imnotkevinbrennan5955 3 жыл бұрын

Good comics don't have podcasts.

@helloimdildo 3 жыл бұрын

@@imnotkevinbrennan5955 oh shut the fuck up

@ccb8714 3 жыл бұрын

Because you can’t make podcasts on a cassette player...that’s why.

@elbandido420 5 жыл бұрын

tommy saw daves terrible posture and said “hold my beer”

@rickybonngarcia 2 жыл бұрын

I love coming back to this episode every now and then

@EverythingisFire 7 жыл бұрын

I love Dave! :) Great to see him make y'all laugh.

@Ste58Vo 6 жыл бұрын

I want to hear Attell's joke about the owl after Bert's big build-up, damn.

@camelclip 4 жыл бұрын

He says it on a new podcast with Mark Normand I think. It goes "Is it just me, or do owls look like attorneys for parrots?

@seanbean4682 7 жыл бұрын

There's a dust bunny swaying back and forth on the bottom of your table Bert.

@JimGetzey 6 жыл бұрын

It's Brett. Brett Chrysler

@smwrbd 5 жыл бұрын

Now I cant stop watching it.

@Sethclement96 3 жыл бұрын

what have you done.

@blazedandconfused477 7 жыл бұрын

Nice! Was about to listen to this audio only, but this is even better!

@kellyperkins786 4 жыл бұрын

The way Tom looked at Bert when Dave said, "at least blink when you say it" had me dying

@riffraff9070 7 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell aka GOAT

@birdistheword.9439 6 жыл бұрын

Riff Raff - Dave "The Goat" Attell.

@JustFun-bm8dz 7 жыл бұрын

I have not seen Tom show this much emotion in the past 15 years, than I did in this one podcast!

@8thlvlMage 7 жыл бұрын

Don't you mean Mrs. Pajetski?

@8thlvlMage 7 жыл бұрын

I was spelling her name wrong on purpose. Tom and Mommy Tina say her name wrong on purpose all the time.

@rustbeltmachine Жыл бұрын

It’s because he is a murlderer, both on and off stage.

@Chemicalx100 5 жыл бұрын

What a great episode. A lot of insight from 3 legends

@paydn202 3 жыл бұрын

im glad i got to see dave live hes been my favorite comic since i was a kid and im 30 now lol when he said he takes directions from a man with a wooden leg cause he knows the quickest ways around lmao

@paydn202 3 жыл бұрын

RIP PATRICE

@stringfellowhawk4843 6 жыл бұрын

Only Dave could pull off something like randomly drinking in a strange city with strange people and make it interested. I wish he could do that Insomniac series again.

@x513xSparks 5 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell is so god damn funny, man.

@MANC2311 7 жыл бұрын

Any comedy pod would kill for this lineup,never heard Attell so comfortable on a podcast.

@augustocordeiro3548 3 жыл бұрын

Dave is so amazing, he is a classic comedian, quick-witted and careless, even sober.

@chrispadilla8789 7 жыл бұрын

that god damn chicken!!!!

@ollie4dad 7 жыл бұрын

That egg the chicken is laying in the background must be HUGE!

@taylor8821 7 жыл бұрын

I love when you actually get the videos up the same time as the audio podcast

@viktornachev3903 3 жыл бұрын

You can see how Tom and Bert are just absorbing the greatness of Dave Attell.... He is the funiesht joke writer of all time !!!!!

@floydian-80 7 жыл бұрын

That chicken is really distracting...

@wisterV 6 жыл бұрын

It gives this podcast a very organic funky feel. Burnt needs to build a donkey barn and raise some goats for milk⁉️

@aaroneusjames2342 5 жыл бұрын

"but I wasn't raised that way..." 😂

@chrisd2424 2 жыл бұрын

I’m So late to the show! I watched,” and the tour with everyone and I saw Dave Attell (yes I call him by his full name until he says not to) during a USO tour in late summer of 2005 in Kuwait. Absolutely amazing. Bert, Tom, Dave, others, I will come to your shows as they are nearest me’. Love the laughs! Love the insight on the podcasts. Keep it up!

@DrShankenstein 6 жыл бұрын

Dave is still one of my all-time fav comics!

@metacafekid 4 жыл бұрын

Dave Attel: "Im not one of the greatest comics, but im a good comic" Dave you fool!

@steari 6 жыл бұрын

"Pick a lemon and make a wish" - Dave Attell

@iceavelli7667 2 жыл бұрын

😂

@michaelzacariasbenjamingla4651 7 жыл бұрын

I really loved an appreciated this. Thank you.

@adamkearney6879 Жыл бұрын

And I know I’m commenting on an old podcast but I respect all things atel Burt and tom. Thanks guys.

@dbsven7282 6 жыл бұрын

Dave Attell is AMAZING............. love that guy.

@TheRolexseller 5 жыл бұрын

I wish this were longer. It went by too fast. Being Dave back. Hell bring Tom back too!

@taipeitaiwan10 7 жыл бұрын

What a stacked episode. Thanks Bert!!!!

@clutchjpc Жыл бұрын

LOL watching Tom try to keep his frustration in about the Chicken is killin me.

@jeremybrown1919 4 жыл бұрын

I've watched Tom for years, when there is a talker on set, he just throws in little questions, so he never has to participate. #respectthegame

@mariozeva2118 2 жыл бұрын

tom and bert are just spectators next to a real comedian like attell

@itscrawford 2 жыл бұрын

that dust bunny under the table moves with their voices woa

@nickyv1436 2 жыл бұрын

Cudos to Bert for letting the goat smoke indoors

@paintednumbers4713 5 жыл бұрын

Never realized how much Dave says "like." Great fuckin podcast, either way! Big fan. Thanks fellas!

@PopeSalty1 7 жыл бұрын

I caught that Attell/Black/Hedberg tour in New Orleans. I remember holding back a puke sessions - those Bourbon Street daiquiris don't play - until the intermission so I wouldn't miss a joke. And you're right about "Skanks", Kreisher - a seminal set, and my initiation to Dave Attell. Not that I didn't watch the shit out of "Insomniac"...