Being friends first is a good basis for taking it further.

@@linda8485 I don't fall in love with someone I treat like a sister I should feel instant attraction in the first weeks

you are fooked if its only one sided... been there and its tough being around that person when there is no mutual interest but you have feelings for that person and you share it, they don't feel the same way. Better to end the friendship than to torture yourself

I just tell them I like them🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

It can happen but it is rare. Once friend zoned always friend zoned. The effort to climb out is not worth it.

It’s actually a bad quality nobody owns a person loyalty but loyalty to principles and morals. The people who expect loyalty don’t want accountability they just want you to be loyal no matter what and that’s dangerous

@@flawlesslawless4180 I dont think loyalty is inherently bad, but its dangerous and shouldn't be taken too far. That's my opinion

Look around and see who I’d doing the betrayals and you know why …..

@@flawlesslawless4180 what? If someone is in a marriage the literally belong to each other, they're each other properties. This is why cheating is wrong. Also people can be loyal without being in a relationship. But man and woman can't be friends.

@@reclaimer2019 you never own someone even when married, if someone loves you they will do right by you and you should do the same. Don’t suffocate something your trying to protect because that will only kill it. Have boundaries and self respect and stick by them

Attraction doesn't have to be about sex though.

@@legalfictionnaturalfact3969but can definitely lead to it

Emily Strickland It seems so ridiculous to only be friends with pretty people. In that case only the beautiful will have friends. Now very mild attraction on both sides = a solid friendship.

I don't mean attracted only by looks, but also their personality. That's what matters the most.

Emily Strickland true

Emily yass

Not really some people you can’t stand but in rough circumstances they’ll be there for you and things starts to change, back to subject I don’t believe I can be just friends with any girl.

I understand your point here. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on it.

I agree with you that's why I suggest an alternative person who explains this best

You a real one

Very wise !

Go find a sizzy to be yo friend lol

That's true

Loyalty only wins with the appropiate distance between a man or a woman in a 'friendship'... better believe attraction will win if the two are constantly having "Friends-night-outs" with just the 2 of you being straight and single and attracted to each other in a 'friendly' way...

Shawntrina Howard Very wise point of view. I agree.

what about the bi people? should they have no friends then?

What if someone feels attraction to both sexes, but never acted on their attraction to the same sex? Are they still immoral? Are they still to have no friends? I'm just trying to show you the extreme cases for a better understanding of the topic we discuss. :)

this is an old comment, but i totally agree! I am in the same situation, my boyfriend's deep connection with his friend AND flatmate is affecting my trust in the future of our relationship and he doesn't want to do anything about it. I even think he is starting to hate me.

Exactly 💯

@@veronikab.7002 oh , man, Veronika! Your comment is 2 years old, how are you today?? Are you still together with him? I am going through the same, currently in phase of breaking up and detaching from my bc he has several female besties including one he especially likes, who is married, both she and her husband dislike me from 1st time of meeting for God knows what reason. It has been hard to get accepted with his friends, in fact, it never happened and my bf(ex now,) has fully sided with them.. Which has made me question how does he feel about me and does he respect me even as a human being, if he is comfortable living in the situation, where his friends are like this towards me (other female friends also don't like me) , where it cause me suffering and he does nothing about it, he is just enjoying the whole situation... I have realized he never loved me and now working on getting away from him forever!

@@veronikab.70022 years on and you've probably broken up. But if your bf is just good friends with her then you need to chill. You can't control other people but you can control what you do and think. If you think he's cheating then dump him, if you think it's just a good friendship then you need to chill.

Thanks! You speak the truth

Yes exactly!!

As if women don't do exactly that. So many of you have that friend we get a funny vibe from, and if it is an issue, women accuse us of being insecure, blah blah blah. But usually, if the relationship goes through a hard time or even break up, guess what friend is 'suddenly' thought of differently.

Well, even if that were true, that means you're Plan A, doesn't it? It means that even though your partner is attracted to the friend, he prefers you. What do you expect? That you're the one and only option for him on this planet, and that if you leave him, he's utterly out of options, snatches you up and chains you to a table in his basement? That doesn't sound healthy. Maybe he's got a Plan B because Plan A doesn't trust him very much?

@@somyan8540 😂😂😂😂

Yeah no shit sherlock. Why do you think smart guys don't invest in a relationship when a chick has 45 million beta orbiters surrounding her? Pro tip for chicks: Want a good guy that invests in a relationship? Remove all male-friends. Period. Men want loyalty and desirability. If the chick has 500 followers on instagram and snapchat with tons of beta orbiters and she has 10 close "malefriends" how do you think the guy is gonna react? What you delusional chicks doesnt realize is that every single one of your "malefriends" would bang you in an instant if you gave em the chance.

it's the same with me. no physical attraction, it doesnt matter if you have the heart of Mother Theresa combined with Einstein's brain, I will still only be able to see you as a friend.

True

@@turtlegaming7756 many people have enxieties and the thing about girls - they often hate showing vulnerability. it would be different with man who you are on the same page with. anyway don't expect a woman to solve all of your problems. if you want to get closer to people you should concern yourself with being genualy nice and helpful to them. people want to be happy and if you make someone happy they would want to stick around. girls aren't immune to mental issues so dont worry we have plenty of "what's the meaning of life and why am i here and what's gonna happen" type of deal. we just share these things with people whowe think that won't potentially hurt us.. makes sense? also it's true that smart people are sometimes more socially detached but remmember that even if you are the smartest person in a room maybe you just need a different room you know? I'm sure you can find some smarts club or "whatever intersts you have" club. anyway you will get better with expirience that's just life. but be humble people are good at hiding their weakneses and deep fears don't judje a book by the cover you might have met a lot of brilliant people but couldnt get to know them for several reasons and aside of that - knowing how to stay happy and motivated is an intelligence on it's own it's not simple and anyone who starts making a living as an adult discovers it at one point or another. so main point I'm sure you can find many brilliant people around you if you will realize what prevents you from doing it. and i think assuming good things about people is great. not unrealistic but you know giving them the benifit of the dought and believing in people (within reason) can lead to great things.

@@turtlegaming7756 you might be just too young. When I was 18 I used to think that I was more intelligent than most people. If you are American or British you might have the chauvinism bias and you may think that girls are not smart as boys (I say those countries because I am not from them but I've watched plenty of American series and movies and I know how chauvinist they are).

Wow, I didn't remember this commentary at all. I have a slightly different point of view now, and now I believe that some people have their attractiveness "increased" by their character

+Nenita Jones oh my god feel sorry for you

Good for you.

👍good for you! You’re a smart lady!!!

The guy is pathetic to even have the audacity to say he chose you. No-man has the authority to choose whether or not they choose you. Don’t give them that power. It’s you who chose them..😊

tavi ng No, she can't even compose a sentence.

It is NOT easy to catch feelings. Only if the feelings are very simple, based on simple, basic, superficial things. I suppose they are for many a man.

I'll never understand how people can say something so idiotic. The burden of proof you're generating by stating that proposition is simply unfeasible. It's completely out of reach, you'll never be able to demonstrate it. And in the other hand, it would just take one case, only one, to prove it's possible. And there are billions. I feel like you're not saying "it's not impossible for boys and girls to be friends", but instead "I once fell in love with a girl who was my friend". And that is completely different. Your extrapolation is absurd. This guy already explained it pretty well: all friendships entails attraction. Doesn't have to be sexual attraction, but if you're not attracted in any way, if you don't like that person nor find anything interesting about him/her; then by definition you're not friends. And even if there's a certain level of sexual attraction (might be but doesn't have to, so this again debunks your hypotheis), why would that mean they can be friends? How on Earth that follows? Sexual attraction isn't antithetic to friendship, you know. By that logic you have, I guess bisexuals are doomed to die alone and sad...

***** If you think that's what I was saying you haven't understand jackass shit, man. I'm kind of surprised that you said I'm using complex language (I'm not even a native), I thought I was being pretty clear. If you find hard to grasp even such simple conceps, maybe the problem is on you and your mental age. Let me explain that again. When you say something like "boys and girls can never be friends" you are asserting a statement whose requirement for evidence - which is called burden of proof, or onus probandi - is absolutely impractical. It would be like saying "all french are bad people". You will never be able to prove such a thing. However, meeting *just one* french who is a good person will falsify your statement. Just one. And, just like with the boys and girls thing, we have TONS of examples. Therefore the mere suggestion of it would be ridiculous. The best you could say is "I don't have female friends", but speaking only for yourself. Because 1) there are billions of people with opposite sex friends without sexual tension and, myself among them; and 2) there's no reason why having sexual tension will necessarily hinder a friendship. PS: Your objection to bisexuality is incorrect since the term gay/straight doesn't define the sex you are going out with at the present moment, but your sexual orientation in general. If you can be attracted to both men and women, then you're bisexual by definition, regardless of the sex of your present couple.

***** What has that anything to do with ego? xD You said something that was objectively misrepresenting my comment and I corrected you. And who is being offended? xDD Would you just stop assuming bullshit. "The proof you keep asking for is "life experience"" Translation = My personal experience therefore reality. LOL. No. Billions of adults have friendships without sexual ttension (me among them) and billions of adults have had sex with friends without destroying the relationship (me among then as well); although of course I'm not dennying that sleeping with a freind often entails certain level of risk. "Your sex and the sex of the person you're in a relationship with does define your relationship as either gay or straight". Sigh. Is it so hard to pay attention while reading? I agree with this. I never said the contrary. Your sex along with the sex of the other person define the relationship as gay/straight, BUT does not define your sexual orientation. That's why your next phrase "therefore you are either gay or straight" is a non sequitur, since bisexual is also a possibility. The term bisexual marriage is not ridicuous; it's an ilogical concept. Because marriage in our society is always a monogamous - only two people. So that would simply make no sense. But that has nothing to do with the fact that being bisexual is a perfectly normal sexual orientation, wether you like it or not; and pulling out statistics out of your ass changes nothing. Being bisexual means "I'm never going to be sexually satisfied with just your parts" in the same way being gay or straight does it. That would the dumbest thing I've read toady, congratulations. Look, being bisexual is just feeling attraction for boys and girls, that's it. Doesn't mean you wanna fuck ALL the girls, same way being lesbian doesn't mean that. Doesn't mean you wanna fuck ALL the boys, same way being a straight woman doesn't mean that. And doesn't mean you can't control yourself, same way having any other sexual orientation doesn't mean that.

***** "It's obvious you're offended" Wow, thank you, I'm learning so much about myself. If according to your logic something becomes true simply by saying it, then I'm gonna say you're a purple donkey with trumps instead of ears and five times more offended than me right now. "and if it didn't go any further after having sex with them it's most likely because you're not very good in bed" So everytime two friends have sex and it doesn't go any further, it's because they are not good in bed, both of them? How about seeing sexuality as a completely natural thing and just wanting to try something new, as a one-time thing? Your statement is absolutely absurd unless you think people don't have the power to control themselves. Or, unless... unless you were trying to use it as a cheap and childish attemp of insult xD But since this is the first time I talk with a purple donkey, I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt here. By the way, you're conveniently ignoring the billions of cases of friends who *didn't* have sex with each other nor have the slightest desire to do so. "it's not the same thing (...) because they have a preference" How do you know? They can be attracted to both sexes equally. That simply depends on the individual. How is that complicated? Same sex --> Gay. Opposite sex --> Straight. Both sexes --> Bisexual. I'd say is pretty simple.

***** "Unlike you". We con back to the same thing, if writting something makes it true, yes you do, because "I say so". See how stupid it is? Nobody is here to insult you. I couldn't care less about if you get offended or not. You misinterpret the idea itself of debate. The only thing I cared was the friendship between sexes, which was what the video was talking about. You shouldn't worry so much about laughing and start worrying a little about thinking. You need that way more.

Some immature Men are terrified of the word "friend" ,they want a prior agreement that they will defo get more from a woman. And that's how they miss out. Because I really like strong creative intelligent men who can control their D and not be controlled by it.

It is actually a sign of inmaturity when it comes down to relationships, trust, honesty and all that stuff. It is an avoidant mechanism because some people are so needy that they neeeeeeeed all the friends to tell them, how aweseome they are. Meanwhile unable to have a long term patnership or opening up to it...because you can always count on your friends to swoop in for ego support. Very grown up, indeed. And all the long term couples didn't get it but you!

@@devilcat7991Absolutely moronic. The OP is mature, you're still a child.

Exactly Karolinah. It's about maturity which is sadly lacking in many people today.

Agreed

How's your relationship?

then i would say pick better friends. or secondly, just reject them and see how they react. i think the reason why people think friendships between the opposite sexes isn't possible is because hardly anyone is in control of themselves, so no wonder it feels like it's not possible. discipline is the answer. and there are disciplined people in the world, they are just harder to find. also, i don't think it's neccesarily a bad thing if on or the other after some time introduces sexual intent (if both are single), then you can decide if you want it too or not, and if you don't, assuming your friendship has some depth to it and you are both somewhat educated, you can still talk about it and stay friends without it being ruined. it's all about proper communication.

I agree with you 100% @chekkygurl182 . It is human nature that if you give them too much time it eventually becomes a problem for one person. First hand experience, not once but multiple times and it creates issues with your partner and I was naive to think that men and women can be friends. Yes it is possible to find loyal friends who respect you and your partners boundaries but it is so so hard to find a friend like that.

​@@Rojo1111 this is the most mature perspective I've seen yet. I think there are some individuals who hold quite a primitive viewpoint of men and women, using words such as 'human nature' and assuming people have no self-control, and that they are at the mercy of their desires. Whilst that may be the case for a lot of individuals, I think there are others in society where like what Matthew describes who EXERCISE their loyalty and they possess discipline, maturity and a more nuanced/complex perspective towards attraction and relationships. People think that a concept as complex as attraction can be reduced to just two people possessing the element of attraction and that's enough for people to break boundaries in relationships, when there are so many more layers as to why we build connections with people.

This has been my experience too. When I wrangle up third parties I feel more safe.

@@jayati.design I have been naive my whole life. It sucks because I never had a dad or brother. My cousin who was like a bro to me passed in 2020. Maybe that's why I search for male platonic friends.

Helena Hayes, I don't believe being friends is a fairy tale. I have many male friends and plan on adding more to the list when I move out of state. I can't make anymore friends here in this city so once I move I can meet new male friends. I have one male friend for 21 yrs.

I could ask them but why does that matter?? The only people who don't crave pleasure are on another planet.ERNESERNES

ERNESERNES Well, this is the most interested post I've seen in awhile. Let me ask you a question because i need some clarity. Okay I have never had anything but mostly platonic friendships with men. Mainly because nobody I like actually likes me back. The guys that like me and I am not interested in dating happen to become lifelong friends. Is there something wrong with this?

Brian Jones Good question. It surpasses my understanding as well. These man friends don't want any physical contact. Not even a little indulgence. We're just hanging out and having a good time. I know them from various situations.

Brian Jones Well Brian they are just as single as I am. I don't go anywhere with men with wedding rings. That would be adultery.

So, the relationship is the problem and not the imature partner that needs support and admiration from outside.

@@devilcat7991 friendship isn’t necessarily support and administration. It can be connecting on an intellectual level or sharing similar interests.

Makes total sense. I prefer male company some of the time that's just banter or activity. But haven't found it yet. No one wants to be friends, I get objectified.

I am a female and I sort of have a masculine personality and I am not gay. I prefer to hang out with men than with women. Trouble is, some of the males that I liked to hang out with eventually started going over familiar which really annoyed me.

If your sig other is included and there is no secretiveness about what you are doing with these females... she may be totally okay with it, once she gets to know each one.

While the test is interesting, it is really a set up and a recipe for disaster. Obviously. The reality is that while you can have friends of the opposite sex, one must exercise a good amount of circumspection around those friendships once they enter into a relationship. it is one thing to have old friends of the opposite sex that you introduce to your partner so that they are more comfortable and don't feel insecure about anything. It's another thing to barely meet someone, or perhaps not even meet them at all in person but just online, and invite them to go meet you for coffee or a drink! This is the point at which things get a little out of line. If you're not up front and open and transparent with your partner than there's something wrong. For example, if you're a musician and you meet someone in passing as a musician who wants to play music then the correct thing to do would be to tell your partner and invite them if they wanted to join you. It would also be more appropriate in a place that isn't someone's apartment or private home. So the point is there are limits and boundaries that couples need to agree upon and then not cross. It's asking for trouble to have friends of the opposite sex without some limits to those friendships and without a discussion with your partner as to how they feel. Every couple is different. Every person is different. If your partner doesn't respect your feelings and is at least willing to work through them with you then there is a problem. Conversely, if someone is too controlling and too demanding and too overbearing that's a problem. Reasonable limits are acceptable. But the test? So we're supposed to set people up and see if they fail or pass? LOL They should best thing to do is have an honest and open discussion with your partner about what your limits and boundaries are and how you feel about certain things and what you're comfortable with and what you're not comfortable with. That's why they're called adult mature relationships. And that's hopefully why they're called committed relationships as well.

What a depressing way to go about life. People are more than just wood and flames. We can understand self control and loyalty. If your confidence in yourself to remain faithful to a partner despite unpredictable whims of attraction is so flimsy, and you believe it impossible for someone to engage with half of the world’s population in any meaningful way without it being sexually motivated, it’s not a reflection on reality but on what you have been taught to accept as normal, and must unlearn. We in the western world are taught that emotional connection and vulnerability are things that only exist within the realms of romance. That isn’t true, it’s a lie that has caused so much suffering. It’s time for all of us to stop perpetuating it. Like most everything, the nature of our relationships with others falls onto a spectrum. It is impossible for a single label to capture the nuance and complexity of reality. Platonic, romantic, these words serve no use beyond generalization. They are a thin veil covering the veritable array of interpersonal connection. When we are little, we know about apples and oranges. And as we grow, we see more of the world, and our knowledge expands to see that no, there are far more than just apples and oranges. There are pineapples, bananas, tamarinds, soursops, pomelos, watermelon, durian, lychee, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. These all fall under the label of fruit, but are all remarkably different to the point where referring to the whole as ‘just fruit’ denies the variation that makes each one unique. And you do not have to restrict yourself to eating only one kind. To accept such a small fraction of what the world has to offer is a travesty. Proper communication, boundaries, and an understanding of self are paramount to navigating the social realm. I understand you made this comment a year ago, but I hope you take my words into consideration.

@@spotliker123 I still disagree. It’s not about my selfconfidence itt’s about respect for relationship. There were millions of cases when it grew from “innocent “ friendships to intimate interactions. Especially when there is a problem in the couple and guy goes for comfort no place other but to his friend that just happens to be a female and then, “ I don’t know how it just happened “ right, happened on it’s own 😂😂😂 just like an earthquake. An other case I know. A married woman was nothing but just friends with here male neighbor. What’s wrong with them having lunch together every now and then? But one evening here husband comes home from work and finds here crying. 😂😂😂 poor lady didn’t know how but it JUST happened, she was sorry. Husband couldn’t forgive, of course and I didn’t blame him . Oh, but we are fruit 🍎 🍌🍏🍉🍇🍐🍋🫐🍍🥭🍒🥝🥥😂😂😂how cute I wonder what fruit are irresponsible individuals who think that you can take what ever the world has to offer even if they disrespect their commitments?

@@olenacalderon9352 I understand you now. You prefer to live within the limits of your immediate vicinity. You take a cup to the seaside and determine whatever you can catch in it to be the sole inhabitants of the ocean. That’s ok. Take care, treat others well.

@@olenacalderon9352You're saying this because you have a low self esteem. If someone I'm in a relationship with grows an attraction to a friend that results in cheating then clearly the person I'm with is not right for me. At least I will know and I can move on instead of wasting time with that person. You can't control people no matter how much you want. But you can control how you act and think of it as a test, if that person has a fling with a friend then you know they're not the one. If that person can have a platonic friendship with an attractive friend then that person is trustworthy and a keeper and will likely be as trust worthy when they're with others.

@@CyrilSneer123 oh no. Sorry bet you got it all wrong. I would never control anyone. But I say they if my potential boyfriend is a close friend with an other women I’ll never see him as a romantic partner. I never says that people of apposite sex have to stay 100 feet away from each other and don’t say a word, but it’s not normal when a man who’s in a relationship spends time alone with his female friend. Of if she lives out of town, he goes to visit here and stays in here place. I just don’t believe in a close friendship between men and women without a sexual interest at least of one side. Last year I dumped a boyfriend because he had female friends. Last drop for me was that he had no time to meet with me but instead spent 4 hours with his female friend. I get it that’s his choice but my choice is not to be with such a guy.

That would mean people are aware of their own emitions 100 percent, while our brain is concious with about 5 % or so...yeah, sounds absolutely reasonable what you are saying. Not starting here on inner dark sides, hidden shadows, freudian ideas...yeah, let's just be sure about it...made my day.

Preach! ✋

Aww hope you're happy now honey :'( my heart goes out to you sweetheart :( grrrr MEN

90r930u5 90dd355 totally agree with you

Well what about asexuals, aromatics and people with way different point of view sexually

Yes!

That's very true

"You know when sometimes you meet someone so beautiful, and then you actually talk to them, and five minutes later they're dull as a brick. But then there's other people, and you meet them and you think 'not bad, they're okay', and then you get to know them, and their face sort of becomes them, like their personality's written all over it, and they just they turn into something so beautiful..." - Amy Pond, Doctor Who

camera man.....

I think it is the name of his camera actually. In some other videos you can see his tripod and there's never anyone behind it.

Jameson is the name of an Irish whiskey however that wasn't a bottle of Jameson he was holding.

But even in other videos, when he's not drinking, he still addresses this Jameson character. I'm pretty sure it's an imaginary friend or something like

I'm pretty sure Jameson is his camera/ audio man. Or maybe his producer?

+Eve Z He is giving an answer. He is saying yes, you can have friends of the opposite sex when you have a girl friend, as long as you don't act on your natural attraction and sleep with them. However, while it may be human nature to be attracted to others, it is also human nature for the person you are with to not like that. So, if you are with that person, your obligation should be to them and their feelings, not a friendship with another woman or women. If you want a relationship where there isn't complete trust and one with hurt feelings, then by all means go for it. If you want a rock solid relationship with someone who trusts and respects you, who would do anything for you and defend you til the end...that rare kind of love...then don't do this..

I think alot of people are forgetting/unaware that you can cheat on your partner without having sex with someone else. Emotionally infedelity.

+lydia ray *emotional

I don't think everyone is like how he describes to begin with. To me personally speaking, it is not THE human nature to be attracted. It may however, be in our nature to appreciate. But you should never confuse the two. Different people have different nature and standards. Some may be completely fine calling themselves committed while they are attracted to, like he describes, every single friend of theirs of the opposite sex. To me, that is just not okay. There could only be so few people I can be attracted to so perhaps that's why I cannot understand his logic.

He answered the question. It simply wasn't an answer for thick-headeds who only want to stick with a yes/no response and God saves us from actually having to think, but rather a reflection.

Pretty much like that. I actually find a good move this thing of gradually knowing a person. I wasted many years picking up girls in nightclubs. A lot of making out and sex, but with lack of connection.

Well, you might not be attracted to your male friend, but it doesn't mean that he isn't, on some form at least, attracted to you. Otherwise there wouldn't be a friendship. You don't friend people you hate or are indifferent to, only those which attract you in some way.

1. that's exactly what i am talking about in the second part of my commet - and i feel it's even more difficult to stay friends with a man who is single. 2. i get your point and yet i have to say: in only date men who fit both my intellectual and physical needs (including looks). and to this day i actually dated all the men who happend to fit into that spectrum. and despite all of that "research" it worked out and i found the one man i want to spend the rest of my life with. not because i think he is the only man i could be with but because he earned my love in a way nobody else could.

Someone who gets it

You'd truly never know unless you but him to a lie detector test

You are delusional. He is NOT your brother.

Well now that was a moment of examination on whether your friend could or would take you at your worst as well as your BEST. Preferences, breaking points, etc. Now you said he LEFT you for your coworker. If he and you were FRIENDS, why were YOU in the market for him as a MATING prospect? Can't do a whole lot about somebody YOU like, not liking you BACK, can you? Either way, the math wasn't in favor of him playing ball with you as he WASN'T up for seeing you depressed all that time. A Sad person just isn't very fun typically, and it's likely from this angle that you and him parted ways. Life can suck!

Jesus, I hope ur doing better-no, amazing rn tho. Fuck that guy!

but i'll be loyal af and finding a loyal partner

@@arri659 I'm doing a lot better now :)

Dude if he can't except you seeing you with your bad days. Everybody has them by the way even stress, depression or anxiety. he definitely a waste of time because this other girl his dating will have the same breakup when she's down. It's total lust fest and nothing more, love excepts you in your bad days and the good days. He did you a favour by breaking up before you even had kids, got married or a serious long time relationship of living together

The definition of a friend, to me, is someone who you sharing your emotional flows, helping each other out, and having fun together. People who you never spend time together but simply laying in your contact list are the people that is called the acquaintances. I have huge loads of female acquaintances, since I never ask them out individually, none of them are consider a friend in my definition, but they are more than average acquaintances as you'll see them occasionally in group gathering. It is just the fact woman and man are different creatures with very different functions. You know about it. If it's only for the sake of a friendship, seeking in your same gender peers will be much easier.

"share relationship problems"...you see, THAT is already a red flag and a problem, because you do not (never!) share these problems with anybody besides your partner, your therapist or same sex friends. If you do so with the other sex, the friendship zone has been left behind and boudaries are breached. Ever asked yourself how your partner feels about you bragging about relationship problems with others that your partner maybe not even be aware of because you rather "talk" to friends? Awesome...so TRUSTworthy...not.

But really, what do you need it for if it is not for an ego boost? If you are fine within yourself and have a partner, there actually is no emotional space that is NEED for a friend of the other sex. Needy people hold themselves a caravane of other sex friends...the rest just simple doesn't need that.

@@devilcat7991 exactly 🔥❗

@@devilcat7991No you're the needy one in thinking like that. I love spending time with my girly mates, great conversation and we have laughs. I also love spending time with my girlfriend, the same great conversation and laughs but there is also sex and the closeness that we have which doesn't happen with my friends. It's not difficult to understand where the boundary lies. Only people with low self esteem cheat and those who try to control their partner and who they befriend.

Depends... I’m great friends with my female coworker. We have hung out many times. I have zero desire for her and she has zero for me. I do like her mind though and we share a love of writing. Also she was the one who set me up w my current girlfriend:) we are all friends. Again it just depends on what you’re looking for etc and on the individual. Hope you’re doing well

Maybe this applies to weak people. My fiancé and I can’t relate. We’ve both had friends of the opposite sex for years. Nothings every happened and we love that we’re secure enough together to give each other platonic freedom.

@@CHK12319 You just have not lived long enough. With age comes wisdom. Putting yourself in a situation doesnt always lead to disaster. That said there is a much higher chance of it happening.

@@dirkdigglerr1 if it’s fragile let it break.

You're not talking about real friendship though.

Amen to that. And bare in mind that the subconcious is always working. It might have figured out that the current relationship sucks, but you are afraid to leave so...let's make some friends and see whats going. Till then we jsut tell our partners not to be so hysterical about nothing...

That's different. It's not like you guys chatted and he got your number from approach 😂