I completely hear you! I also have my doctorate in biochemistry and after two years of a postdoctorate, I got pregnant with my beautiful daughter. I decided just like you to stay home with her and put my career on hold. Then my beautiful baby boy came along and I continued to stay at home with them to enjoy the most amazing years of their lives! I thought I was making a mistake but in hindsight I loved every minute. It was stress free and pure! I became a full-time Mom and I realized that not many women can have this opportunity to watch their children grow! After they started school, I decided to be a small business owner and opened a Kumon Math and Reading center! It was a completely different career choice, but my background in Math and Science allowed me to help kids understand and excel in Math and Reading, build self-confidence, do better in school and set the foundation for them to attain their goals. Who knows, maybe I can nurture future Biochemists, but this choice was the best choice I could make for my life! Cheers to all women who have the courage to do the unthinkable and follow their heart!

In Denmark, parents have 1 year paid maternity leave per child. I wish more countries had such opportunity to be with their kid

I did it for almost 20 years. Homeschool, farming, lost social life, divorce and everything. I was lonely, exhausted, broke, confused alot of the time and I will never regret it. My children and I are so close and they are the most amazing people. Other people see tbe difference in my kids and want to know what I did differently. I was there. ❤

I can relate! I graduated from Harvard and went on to law school. Now I am a stay-at-home mom and want to be my child's primary caregiver. It is hard to trust anyone!

Spending time as a stay-at-home parent should not count as time out of the workforce. I mean, if nothing else, it counts as caretaking and leadership experience.

As a lawyer who is 28 weeks pregnant with her first baby I needed this video.

I chose to stay home with my children. Now my oldest is 25 and my youngest is 16. I am so happy I was given the opportunity to stay home with them. It was a blessing.

This is everything. I experience stay at home mom shaming REGULARLY. Everything you said in this video is 100% accurate. I am someone who has many single working mom friends, and I am their biggest cheerleader. I am fortunate and blessed that I am able to be home with my daughter, as my husband works a job that requires him to travel & therefore, he is gone anywhere from a few weeks to a few months at a time. Other than the financial aspect, I am a single mother the majority of the time. I am blessed to not have to work and worry about money. However, I am constantly bashed, belittled, & criticized for my CHOICE to stay home with my daughter. Even more disheartening, the constant bashing comes from my own mother. She says things like, “why don’t you get a JOB and set an example” & “you have too much time on your hands, get a JOB”. It is unfortunate that in this age where women are becoming more and more empowered, that we still have this type of judgement and shaming for the choices that we make for our families. I really really appreciate this video and I plan on listening to it every time I am feeling shamed for choosing what is best for me, my daughter, and the future of my family. Thank you, Mayim. Thank you so much. 💗

My husband and I are making serious financial sacrifices so I can stay home with our 5 months old boy. It’s not easy as we had to adjust our spendings significantly but it is so worth it. I love staying home with our baby.

I love you Mayim. I'm an RN. I never intended to be a SAHM. I went back to work 3 months after my son was born. It lasted 3 weeks. I cried EVERY day I had to leave him. And HE cried because he would only take the breast and would not take a bottle while I was gone. One day he got so worked up that it scared my mom and when I got home that night my husband said "you're not going back to work." And I called my boss and said "I'm sorry. I can't come back." They were understanding. At first, I had an identity crisis. I had always worked and prided myself on being an independent woman. Seeing my son grow changed that. I knew I was the most important job I have ever done and being there for every moment was so special to me. My son and I have the strongest bond and I am so proud of that. A lot of people disrespected me for my choice but I don't care. I wouldn't trade one moment of being home with my son. All the reasons you stated are exactly my reasons.

I Love this!! I stay home with my 3 kids and pregnant, working on my 11 😉. I was working but realized What I wanted wasn’t going to work while working I was exhausted, fighting with my husband, and too stressed for my kids. I also was reading my bible and was trying to model how God designed the family but was fighting the being dependent on your husband part. Which was more of my mom and grandmas lifestyle of motherhood and marriage so I adopted their traditional ways of thinking. I put the full providing responsibilities on my husband and now i focus on my home and kids. And I love it!!! Everyone is happier!! And my husband has shot up in the providing category which I wasn’t expecting. I believe God blessed us because we listened Him.

Staying home with my kids full time has been the best decision I ever made!

In Czech we can stay at home until the kid is 3 years old with a little financial support from the government. It's great, I am so grateful to be a stay-at-home mom

In my most recent job interview, I just had a compliment on my resume because I included my 10 years I stayed home with my girls. He liked the way I broke down my time at home into visual tasks - balanced priorities to create and implement budget, taught and modeled ethics, worked closely with educators to closely monitor academic performance, etc,. I’m very thankful we were able to swing me staying home, a lot of families these days just can’t do it.

I got pregnant my last semester of college graduated with a Bachelor’s degree with not knowing what to do. I stayed at the job I had been at for 6 years & then made a decision to leave when my daughter turned 1 to stay home with her because I barely saw her with working over 40 hours & I was not happy working there anymore. I would see her in the morning & just before she went to bed so I knew something had to change. BEST decision I ever made. I am now home with my daughter & pursuing & starting an online business in order to continue to stay home & have more children! LOVE this video.

When we got married we tried to live off of only my husbands paychecks so that I could stay home once we had kids. I now have an almost 3 year old (hoping to get pregnant soon) and am able to stay at home. We definitely make some sacrifices in order for me to be able to stay at home. Our cars are old and we rarely eat out. Vacations are not happening until we have saved enough to replace one of the cars. I do feel judged a lot for staying at home but daycare costs more than half of what I would earn and I do want to see my kid grow up and not pay someone else and miss out.

I'm a grandparent who has decided to cut back my work in order to allow my daughter(a teen Mom)to finish highschool while i become a Mom all over again. I know this action will cause a drastic tightening of my budget BUT the satisfaction i feel knowing i am there for my beautiful grandaughter AND helping my daughter have a better chance in life are worth it. Yes, being a teen Mom was NOT the best of choices BUT i wouldn't trade my granddaughter for anything! I've prioritized- EXTRA stuff is not going to have me miss the precious moments with my grandbaby😀. Thank God i can make that choice.

I don't see why people have to explain why or why not they stayed home or went back to work. Everyone does what they can in their situation.

I was fortunate enough to be a stay at home mom for 9 years. One of the absolute best things I could have done for my Son. I tell my son while your young you can pick money over time but when you get older and have a family, pick time. Those years are precious and fly so fast. I wouldn't ever change my decision to stay home. Never feel bad for picking family over work.

I am glad I saw this video. I am a mother of two girls.I was working for Microsoft as a software engineer. I was unable to balance work and family. So I quit my job when I was pregnant. But the society made me feel that I was a failure. Since I was not in the job force. I went into severe depression. My children are 13 and 8 years old. I am still feeling wasted that I was at home all this time. But now I feel worthy of myself. My husband has been a pillar of support for me all this time. Thanks for being an inspiration for sahm like me. I am really grateful for this video.

This made me emotional. I was not prepared by any means for motherhood. I had no idea what I was getting in to. I THOUGHT I’d go back to when my son was 3 months old but here I am 2 years later at home with him. I was in no way ready to return to work physically or mentally when my son was that young. I had no idea I’d have postpartum depression and be so exhausted I thought I’d die. No one told me this. I know women do it everyday but I discovered there’s no way I could give both 💯 to my son and a job and a marriage and a household. Thank you for this video.

Living in Sweden is a good thing when it comes to having kids. We can stay home with our kids for over a years, with pay! And we can divide it between both parents almost any way we like. For me, being home for that long almost made me crazy, so for our third child we split the time 50-50.

My love for my job was gone after I became a mom. Staying home with my precious little bundle (and working my butt off!) was the best and easiest decision ever. ❤️

I'm a stay at home mom for my little boy and I have not once regretted this decision. Jobs will always be there, but the milestones our babies go thru are once in a lifetime. I want to always be there for my son and make sure he feels secure and knows just how much he is loved! ❤💙

I was brought up by a stay-at-home mom. I have always been so grateful and appreciative that she went against the grain and made that choice. We didn't have much when I was little...our living room was empty for several years, one winter they couldn't afford heating oil and we spent nights huddled around a kerosene heater...but I wouldn't have traded my mother being there for anything in the world. I can't put into words the joy and confidence my mother's constant presence gave me as a child. Don't let a capitalist, materialistic culture make you feel insecure for putting your children first. We're truly living in upside-down world when women are judged badly for devoting themselves to raising their children.

Holy crap. I've never seen any of your videos, and for the first time ever you showed up in my reccomendations. This video showed up in my reccomendations. What's crazy is that I JUST got off the phone with my sister, crying because I wanted to be a stay at home mom but was torn because I felt unaccomplished. I felt like people viewed me as the one who "gave up her dreams to stay at home and now has it easy" but watching this video reminded me- this is my new dream. Every precious moment and new discovery of my little toddler I get to witness and it is a DREAM come true. Thank you for helping me remember that being a stay at home is hard and is an accomplishment. Thank you for reminding me of all the blessings I get to witness with the difficult decision I made to stay home. Not sure if you believe in God, but I believe that God wanted me to see your video. Total fate. ❤

I was a banker with a master degree, now I am a stay-at-home mom with a 14month baby girl. I just move from China 7months ago. Now living in L.A without any friend or family, only my baby and my husband. it makes me depress for months, but is getting better since I enjoying watching others mom from KZfaq and try to make my own vlogs. It is nice to hear stories from other moms. Thank you!

Omg I needed this, after my BA in biology I got married and became pregnant. I had gone to college later in life and when I graduated I was 30. I love being a stay at home mom and I’m so grateful to have this opportunity . . But it’s hard to not think I’m throwing my career away or that I’m wasting a degree I’ll never get to use again... my little man has just turned one and I am in a constant state of anxiety about feeling like I need to go back to work to feel like I have worth again. Ty for the support you have for other moms like us... we really don’t get the help and encouragement we need.

its such a difficult and thankless job and people often look down on it, and i just cant wait till when society wakes up and realize that its the most selfless and one of the hardest job.😣

You saying “I was there for...” made me so happy to hear. I am there for EVERYTHING my son goes through and does and I absolutely love it. I felt my job a few weeks before having my son because I would have made $100 more a month than daycare would have been. I’d much rather stay home than make $100 a month take home and not see my son every moment of every day. He’s 2 now and my husband works hard for our family but we’re happy

I envy those who love to stay home and raise their kids during the working week. I’ve done it for 5 years now with two children, but it really wasn’t for me. Taking a year or two in the home probably would have been a better balance for me, but the isolation, the falling behind, the losing myself to motherhood (because people only started asking me about the kids, and my husband about all of his achievements, passions and social life), and the constant repetitive, monotonous long days had really spun me into anxiety and depression. What’s worse is that I beat myself for feeling this way. I asked myself what kind of mother am I to be thinking this way. I guess a normal one 🤣

I was lucky enough to take a year off with both my toddler children while my wife went back to work and I was the full time parent. Best job in the world. We took turns taking a year or two off though my wife took more time because she needed to do the things I couldn't (like carrying our babies in her womb and breastfeeding), We both returned to work when the kids went to school. In my mind there is no job more rewarding or joyous than being a stay-at-home-parent. That whole career thing never looks you square in the eyes and says "I love you to the moon and back daddy"

Shouldn't have to have a disclaimer! Women should support each other in their choices!!

I feel like we've flipped compared to previous generations. Before, it was looked down upon if you weren't home to raise your children. Now, it feels you're judged if you want to stay home with your kids and not focus on a career. Whether you are able to, or you pay someone else to do it, someone has to be there to raise babies. There's no shame in either decision. I've loved being a SAHM, and now that my kiddo turned 4, I'm starting to feel that I can begin focusing on my education and career seeing as full-time school is only a couple years away for my little one.

I appreciate this point of view. She's definitely blessed to have the privilege of staying home.

For the past 24 years My husband and I have lived a low income lifestyle just so I can stay home and raise our kids. If money is needed to be made, I watch other peoples kids as well or I find a side hustle that can be done when my husband gets home from work. Its all about priorities. We have 5 kids ranging from 24 to 1

From a child's perspective. My mom worked three jobs when I was growing up and I saw how much stress that put on her but I'm so thankful for all she gave up in order for me and my siblings to have what we needed. She still knows my first word and jokes about how weird I was as a child but also wishes she had been there for more. I love her so much and now I'm glad she can be a stay at home mom for my little brother. Love your videos 😊😊

I was a portrait studio manager for 16 years. I was one of those moms who had no choice but to work. I missed everything you said you were there for with my 16 and 11 year old. I now have a 8 week old and a new husband who supports me staying home and I love it! Thanks for the encouragement

Love your honest take on this. I worked as a nanny in the UK for a number of years and loved all those special moments that I shared with the children I was looking after. When I started a family of my own I didn't want to miss any of those moments. So pleased that we made the financial sacrifices that it took to have me at home with the kids. It's not an easy road but full of so many blessings along the way. Thanks for giving such a clear and honest voice to what I and I'm sure many others are feeling. I have subscribed to your channel to hear more sanity :) :) Have a great day - Heather in NZ

It sucks everyone is so sensitive now, we all have to explain and use disclaimers before speaking our opinions or experiences 🤔

Love this video! I love staying at home. I am an RN and haven’t worked since the day before I gave birth (14 months). People need to understand that if you can stay home and want to/do you aren’t a lesser person because of it.

I’m an MD who’s homeschooling three kids. It’s the most rewarding and most difficult job ever. Thanks for the video

I loved your words. Ive just resigned from work during my maternity leave. Ive been home full time mom since six month as the age of my second daughter. I knew i May regret it but until now im thankful ive made the choice. My heart and mind both said yes it only took from me the courage to do it

I'm currently working as a chemist and 22 weeks pregnant. I'm going in to a PhD chemistry program in August. I'm making the decision to go to school after and during my pregnancy because it allows me more time to be home with my baby than I have in my current position, while still doing some career work. Every family and situation is so different. ♥️

Totally agree with you! I 💗 being a SAHM. It's the most selfless "job" in the world. It's refreshing to see other women feel the same way.

I’m glad your happy in your choice! In my experience having a mother who worked from 8am to 8 pm every weekday was AWESOME. I think it made me really independent (not that you can’t make your kids be independent if your staying at home) and it made me bond with my grandparents who would later leave me in life. I loved having her all for myself during the weekends but having the freedom to explore different things and different cares by different people during weekdays. This was just my experience :)

All the respect in the world for SAHMs. I would love to do it, but I know that for my own personal mental stability I NEED to work. And I know my kids will need me to be mentally stable.

2019-KZfaqrs becoming celebrities 2020-celebrities becoming KZfaqrs

I'm a SAHM. I was at Walmart in customer service and the lady behind the counter was upset and said "I hate retail!" Me too! Did it for 6 years. So I know how she felt, or at least I thought I did. I asked her what job she wanted if she could have any job. She said she just wanted to be with her daughter, raising her (her words). My heart just sunk for her. I can't imagine wanting to be with your child but not being able to. Since then I've never taken for granted the fact that my husband has a good enough job that I can be home with our son. And I'm thankful that I have a husband who not only supports me being a sahm but that it was/is just as important to him as it was/is to me that I be home with our son and any other children we might have later. Before I was married I was working retail (and in college) when a customer asked me what I wanted to be if I could be anything. I said a mother and he laughed at me and said that there are much more important things. Maybe to other people, but not to me. I can't think of any job I could be nearly as passionate about as I am about being my son's mother.

I'm pregnant with my third child and something change inside of me,now I am homeschooling and staying home and I love it.i feel that is my calling. I'm with you!

I’ve been a stay home mom of 4 for 26 years now. My youngest is 17 and the only one home. My kids are my life. I guess I was one of the few lucky mothers that had this opportunity. I pretty much did it alone as my husband worked out of town. I enjoyed every second of my life and would not change it for anything.

I had my first son 6 weeks ago and decided to become a stay-at-home mom. The most common and dreaded question I receive is "when do you return to work?" A lot of people seem taken aback when I tell them I quit my ECE teaching job (though I still have my remote ghostwriting position) to raise my child. I find myself having to defend my decision, and this can be disheartening when trying to learn the ropes of being a new mother. I'm glad I found this video (and your channel).

I just went back to work after being a stay at home mom for 20 years. My youngest child (18 soon to be 19) will be moving out at the end of February. Best decision I have ever made. I’m extremely grateful that I had the opportunity to make that choice to stay home.

I tried working on my first baby. It absolutely killed me. I realised somewhere between childhood dreams and the teenage race for exams, college and career that all I've ever wanted was to be a wife and mother. I was shamed and interigated as to why I'd give up my job. I wholehearted agree that I wished motherhood and taking the time to raise our children was given the value that it truly holds. Feminism in Ireland is starting to devalue choosing to be a stay at home mom and the effects are visible in our society.

Psychologist here, after having my son I decided to stay at home, 8 years ago. Best decision ever. Still don’t have a lot of time for myself, but I don’t mind. Life is not short, will do something for myself in few years:-) Having healthy child and watching him growing up is the best life reward.

With my husband we have decided that I'll be a stay at home mom and homeschool our kids, but at the moment I'm finishing my degree in case something happens and I'd have to go to work. You never know what life brings, husband can get sick or lose his job, so it's always good to have plan B!

Thanks for being real! Being a mom is the hardest and best thing I do.

Beautifully said. I did the same. I finished my undergrad after my son went to kindergarten. I love your humor. 💕

i was lucky enough to be able to be a stay home mum until my son was almost 3. I loved all the day-to-day mummy stuff. So many of my friends were bored and went back to work in a year, I was never bored once. My career took a massive hit, I went from running a department in a school to starting back 3 years later in a new place as a classroom teacher - but my son will never be small again and I am working my way back up. I had my son at 34 adn am 40 now and I wouldn't change a thing. If you want to stay at home you should be able to and if you're bored by staying home you should go back to work. Happy parents = happy children. If only everywhere gave mums the opportunity for longer paid maternity.

Still ladies be careful, I know a lot of cases when smth happens to the husband or he simply leaves and then the woman is left on her own very vulnerable and without financial assistance ( especially if you are from a developing countries where the divorce law isn’t like it’s in the USA ), also make sure your man doesn’t start to put you down ( happens a lot too, he starts feeling superior or he is a sadist enjoying control )

I totally agree. I live in Australia and have 4 kids. They are now aged from 19 to 27 years old. I was home with them 95% of the time. My husband is amazing (he worked a factory job - so we were NOT well off, we also have a mortgage etc) My kids were never in day-care, even though my Mum owned and ran a day care centre. I had post natal depression following the birth of my 4th child, and my Dad, who had recently retired would visit every weekday so I could collect my other children from school with out taking the baby. Staying at home is do-able. One needs to make adjustments to expectations, and when "well-meaning working friends" telephone and ask "What do you do all day??", you can calmly answer - "What the workers in your child care centre (day care) do, plus run the house etc". NOT for everyone. It was right for me. XXX Love you Mayim XXX

I wish we could make it work. I have a 6 year old and 6 month old twins but the reality is, there is nowhere to cut. We already don't go on vacations or own nice cars. We don't have any savings and live paycheck to paycheck. I work days and my husband works nights because we also can't afford childcare. I love my kids and I hope that my stress, frustrations and guilt don't peek through so much that it is detrimental to them.

The time I spent with my children helped them to be more sure of themselves, more intelligent, better socially adept. I was available to answer questions that can't wait, we watched the trash trucks and freight trains, cleaned dinosaur bones, weekly trips to the library, daily summer fun. I am thankful daily that we were able to have a parent at home. It was HUGE!

It's really refreshing to hear someone speaking both positively and honestly about motherhood and staying home with their kids.

Very balanced point of view. No, not all mother's can stay at home to raise their kids but, we do have choices. I decided not to take on better paying jobs, which also demanded longer hours, because as a divorced mom, I wanted to be home when my kids got home from school or simply to be a homemaker for them. Kids don't ask to be born, so I think we have the responsibility to be there for them as much as we can. They're all adults now and we're all very close. I don't regret having sacrificed my career for them. They are worth it. (I have 5 kids and a grandson)

I have a PhD in Psychology Research and Evaluation - all that fun statistics and analysis. I had my son well after I got my degree in 2009, so in 2014 when he was born, I was working in the field of research, outside the home. I stayed home with him for 8 weeks and then it was back to work. I hated not being able to be home with him, but luckily have my dad (his poppy), as his daycare provider. I decided though to take an opportunity that came my way, that allowed me to work from home (contract administrator for an orthopedic implant company my husband also works for) so I could get my son up every day, have breakfast with him, and be here to at the end of the day (and down the road, be able to get him off the bus). Am I working completely outside my field of study? Yup! But for now, at this time in my life and with my son, it works great. Maybe down the road when he is older I will go back to research. Who knows.

omygod this is what I need to hear right now. I quit my job just couple of months ago to be with my baby and develop a healthy rhythm. Currently feel like I'm trapped in an unknown blob where I feel overwhelmed, though the first months I handle it gloriously. Thank you Mayim!

I am a 22 year old who has a 3 year old brother. A few months after my brother was born, my mom decided to work so I was left with all the sisterly duties. I was at university and didn't have a life aside from going to classes and going home to take care of my brother. I am happy that I am helping my family, but this also put me into a state of depression since I didn't have the time to further my career by getting internships and didn't have time to join clubs and socialize. I have graduated now and only working as a cashier despite being a Dean's Lister for all school years. I want to apply for internships or volunteer to gain more experience but my mom keeps saying that I am selfish if she quits her job for me. I really wish I had a mom like you.

Well said. Thank you. Im a say at home mom to my 19month old and have no regrets.

So true, we need to prepare and support parents/people so much more! It would make such a big difference for the development of society and humanity.

No job on this planet is more important than raising kids.

The way she said, "I watched them *speak words* for the first time." 😭💖😁

Every video that you release just makes me love you more! I stayed home with my first baby for a year....and while of course I loved and adored him, I feel zero shame saying I really disliked being a stay at home mom. (The fact that the first six months of that were spent battling/in treatment for incredibly severe postpartum depression did not help.) But that aside, I really missed my career. I was lonely and even though my husband was completely supportive, honestly I was incredibly uncomfortable not bringing home a paycheck and contributing financially. I went back to work and when I had my second baby, I stayed home for 4 months and then went back to work. Two years later, I don't regret that decision one bit.

It takes a village to raise a child. Americans really have it all screwed up. In traditional societies, the extended family helps, the mom is never alone with her kids-grandparents, aunties, uncles. That's how it was done for millions of years, and only in the last few decades women were left alone to deal with their kids. It is not natural. Humans are tribal animals, we've lived in a close-knit tribes for hundreds of thousands of years. It is sad that it is like that-we have lonely elderly population, and desperate moms, who have to choose between the career they love, and their kids. There is a middle ground, but it is not in the US, sadly.

Omg!!! It’s like God heard my cry and answered by helping me find this video. I’m so depressed coming into work everyday. And then having to deal with the nonsense at work. I had to come back with my baby being 3 mos old. Everyday I drop her off I can’t let her go. The daycare workers have to tell me bye so I can get the hint to let go and leave. I miss my baby so much while at work. And the chaos of both of us working is insane. I know I’m blessed to even have the option to try to make staying home work. My first two babies were from a previous relationship and staying home wasn’t an option. I was single parent and I HAD to work. Now with me being married and my husband earning a good income, it’s an option. I wish I could quit tomorrow, but I’m 8 mos shy of being fully vested in my pension. I honestly don’t even know if I’m going to make it that long, bc the thought of me missing 8 more months of watching my baby grow just makes me extremely sad. But, I do feel more encouraged or give this some more thought and weigh my options. THANK YOU!

I loved being a stay at home mum. Unfortunately we divorced. I am in my 50's now and have to go out to work, I would rather stay home and be a home maker. I love gardening and cooking and cleaning and I love being my own boss and making my own timetable. I have 2 degrees.

I was not blessed with children because of health issues but I respect you for putting your children before your career. You are blessed to be able to make that choice because so many people are just not able to choose to stay home instead of work.

I don’t have kids yet, but in my heart I’ve decided to become a stay home mom. So I started my own ESL online teaching business and I teach online. It’s going well and I am adjusting. You can still be a career woman and be at home. 🙂🙌🏻

Love this video! I’m a stay in home mom in Mexico since my child was born. I was a junior high and high school History teacher and i left it all for my baby. Yes i went to the university and studied History, after that i took teacher’s courses and worked for 10 years. I think the stigma for profesional women who choose to stay home it’s a real thing. I was asked the same questions over and over again, i was overwhelmed with that situation 🥺, until one day i start defending my choice. One time my sister told me i can regret anything but never choosing to take care of my kid. She’s so right!!! I love staying with my kid, he’s now 4 ☺️💖. Maybe i will return to teach one day, but not today...

Whoo hooooo!! I LOVED this video!!! I just had my first baby, and I agree with this 💯% I am also a mom who decided to leave my career and make a living from home. I think being there for him is more important than leaving him in a daycare. I agree our country should help women who want to be home with their kids to do just that. Don't stop speaking about this it resonates believe me.

Love this conversation! A few points I'd like to make from my side of things as a full-time working mother: 1. I agree we need more policies in place that allow mothers to be home with their kids for more than 4-6 weeks! I was fortunate enough to take 12 weeks off with my second (compared to 8 with my first) and even then, it wasn't enough. Plus, it was financially draining and difficult because it was unpaid. 2. There is definitely an unhealthy emphasis placed on career success in our country, and I've experienced it first hand. However... 3. Working is extremely fulfilling for some mothers. Though I wish I had more than 3 months off work after a newborn, I was eager to go back to the work I enjoyed doing with co-workers I enjoyed work with. 3. My children are my everything, as I am to them. They (almost) always come first. But, there's also an importance on the parents that have to be prioritized at times. For us, it's as simple as a date night away from the kids, but as extensive as a few nights away on vacation, and for some--it's their career. Of course, this can't be possible for everyone and is probably could be a whole other topic for another video! We are so fortunate to have close-by family who are the caregivers during the 8-5 work week, and this certainly plays a large factor in my ability and desire to work full-time. P.S. Stay at home moms truly rock. And yes, it's work. It's a lot of freaking hard work!

I love you Mayim! You've given me so much more confidence about the decisions I make as a mother such as breastfeeding past infancy and staying home with my son. Thank you so much for these videos they give me a lot of joy.

My Mom died from complications of diabetes when my firstborn was 6 mos old. Before she died, one of her last pieces of advice to me were: “Breastfeed your babies for at least 2 years. Those years will fly by so fast, and you can never retake them when they have passed. Your children will need it as a good foundation in life. I promise you, you won’t regret it.” She breastfed all 6 of us (me and my siblings) for at least 2 years each, and we turned out healthy and okay, so I believed her. 3 kids and 10 years later, I know now that she was right. I love those bonding moments with my children and I am a better person for it. Thank you, Mayim, for the encouragement.

Thank you for acknowledging one of many positive choices women can make and still be great parents. I never looked down on working mothers, yet I often was criticized for staying home and leaving a lucrative but demanding career. It is always nice to hear, even 18 years later, that I was not alone.

Thanks for this. My 3 Children aged 9 to 15 are my life. It was a choice to stay home. I have a college degree and was working all the way up to my due date. I had picked child care and planned to go back but I could not leave my little girl. Was it easy? No. I’d thought I’d go crazy for want of adult companionship but eventually I found other moms and made great connections. When my youngest started school I decided to stay at home still. I’m as busy as ever and often wonder how working moms get it all done. I love that you called it a choice. Often I hear from women that I’m being a bad example for my daughter or I need to have a career to be complete. As women and as a society we need to stop criticizing each other and just offer support any way we can. In the end working moms or stay at home moms want the same thing, happy kids.

As a human being who has seen periods of time where my mother was a stay at home parent and then my dad (for medical reasons), i think I have maybe a different perspective. I remember my mother struggling with patience for us kids because she was still working through a lot of baggage from her own childhood. I remember my dad didn't struggle with patience for us so much as struggle with depression over his medical issues. I also remember my mother being very cold except when we made her look good but my dad was compassionate especially on our bad days. I think my mother didn't really have the temperament to be a stay at home mom, I think it might have been bad for her mental health. I'm not saying my dad was perfect, he struggled with his own issues too, but I never had to question whether or not he loved us. EVER. I do think that children can benefit from having a stay at home parent; however, I disagree that the stay at home parent be selected because of sex or gender. I think whether or not a parent stays home at all should be determined by finances, and which parent if any be determined based on a combination of which parent wants to and can they survive on the other parent's income.

I can really relate. I was pregnant when I started my Masters degree and having a newborn/infant while doing school is damn hard. When I finished my Masters I decided to stay home, at the time it was financially possible because my husband had a good income and if I went back to work my entire salary would essentially be going to childcare. People are always shocked to hear that I have a Masters degree and decided to stay home and raise my son. We live in a society where people expect other people to think like they do and make decisions like they do. Staying home to raise children doesn't seem like an important job to most people and as a result women who stay home are viewed as not very smart and lazy. I have experienced the way people change their opinion of me as soon as they hear that I am a stay at home mum, all of a sudden I am not smart enough to have basic conversations about politics or the economy or anything none child and home related 🙄 you really inspire me Mayim👏

I’m a mother and a nurse. I absolutely love being a nurse, but I love being a mother a million times more.

I have always said you can do a lot of things, but you cannot do a lot of things well. That’s been my personal mantra raising my 4 little ones, & choosing to stay home during their formative years. I admire you for doing the same, because parenting is the most important job we will ever have. If we don’t get that right, what else matters?

Wow you just rocked my socks off! Thank you for choosing the most non-glamorous, underrated, unappreciated, underpaid, undervalued and IMPORTANT job! I have been fortunate enough to be a SAHM for several years and even through all the sacrifices, am so glad I did. I’m so grateful I was able to raise my own children. Thank you for promoting the most important role in our society. Not “just a mom”..... but MOTHER!!! Bravo! 👏🏼👏🏼

You. Are. Amazing 🎉🎉 I am so glad to look up “How I made the decision to be a SAHM “ and find your video! Your public presence for the breastfeeding community and attachment parenting has given me the affirmation I needed at times that yes, it’s okay to want to be a certain type of parent for my child. I completed my doctorate recently, when my son was 6 months old. He is now 10 months old. I want more children. I want to be present for my children. I want to make their meals, rock them to sleep, nurse until they no longer need, and create exciting days and experiences with them. I am ready to be 100% present, even though I’m more tired at home with them than I am at work. I am teaching uni part time while working on research and publications. I’m fortunate that my husband is able to support my part time-ness. I often feel that, because I have over a decade of full time work experience and a PhD, I owe it to someone (myself? The world?) to continue with it all. My colleagues know me as one person. My son needs me as another. It is very hard when your core beliefs are pulled in a direction that society does not respect as much as it seems the working mother is respected. It is unsettling to me that our society seems to support that higher education must be put to use, as if raising small humans is less valuable, when they are the future generation. Anyway, thank you!! Your words resonated. I will be on the job market for the next uni cycle, but putting my beliefs in God’s hands for what will happen.

Hi from Georgia! I love your videos! I've done the same, staying home with my boys. I didn't get as far with my education; I've postponed that as well. My oldest has autism and my choice was pretty clear. I'm a single parent though so it's been a really rough a rocky road but SO worth it. Kids need their mother!

Wow! This actually made me cry. I am a stay at home mom and finished my degree while my son was 6 months old. This really resonated with me and made me feel validated for being a stay at home mom. Thank you so much!!

Great video! It’s refreshing to have open & honest discussions about this. I think something that is important to note, is that many women want to go to work for more than just the money. Having a career can be incredibly fulfilling and maybe it’s a bit frustrating that men are still able to have that, because 99% of the time it’s the women staying home from work to be a fulltime mom (and not a father being a fulltime dad). I don’t have children yet but I would love to be able to stay home for the formidable years of childhood development - but it begs the question, what do you do once that time is done? For most people who don’t homeschool, after a certain age your children are in school full-time, so it would be reasonable for the mother to go back into the workforce again. However, the crux of this whole thing is that it’s hard to stop your career at age 28 and not pick it up again until 10 years later. For most career paths, it’s almost impossible to catch up after that much ‘time off’ (I don’t mean time off like it’s a vacation, just time off from full-time work). Curious to hear what anyone thinks about this!

This means a lot. Thank you ! We are often taken on a guilt trip by people around for either why are you staying at home or why are you working etc this is the time we should stand for ourselves and do the best for our kids. Keep inspiring. Much love from India!

Stay at home mom! My son is 18 and I feel very fortunate to have been able to be with him at all the special events etc. it was a lot of sacrifice and I gave up a career but I wouldn’t change a thing!

As a poor stay at home mom I love this. When my daughter was born we had to compare the cost of child care versus income and realized it was cheaper if one of us stayed home. It's about a thousand times more difficult to stay at home than people seem to realize, but it's also incredibly rewarding even if it doesn't always feel like it.

Career SAHM of 14 years and counting! My prior career was in medicine and Hubs was/is a teacher. His job was the more family friendly (by far) and I had the boobs to feed the babies, thus the choice of WHO would stay home was made! We practiced AP when we had littles and continue to live an entirely family-centric lifestyle now that they're older. Family has always been the focus of our marriage because it's what feels natural and right to us, it's never been a problem in our relationship (20+ yrs as a couple, 30+ friendship). Teacher's salaries being what they are, we have sacrificed the fancier things in life but we have all of our needs and some of our wants covered. I supplement our income by subbing at school, teaching a bit of Archery, and offering personal styling services. I volunteer extensively in our schools and community. This Mom gig absolutely IS my identity, and I am very proud to say that! It's a career that has fulfilled me. I take pride in what I do for our family and our community. I've seen the difference my SAHM career has made, not just in the lives of my own children, but in many others who have benefited from the time I've spent volunteering at their school. Kids regularly TELL me how much it means to them to have me there and say they wish their parents were able to spend that time with them, too. I feel extremely blessed & fortunate to do what I do for a living! I'm frustrated that society in general devalues career parenting, devalues family. I hate our dual income economy most of all!

I know so many people who have kids, but looking for babysitters because they don’t want to give up the material stuff. In reality most people choose materials over family

I wholeheartedly agree. I am struggling with my own decision, but I'm leaning toward giving up a lucrative college teaching career to care for my three little ones. For me, nothing else really feels right. I a, however, scared about my financial future, scared of being judged harshly, scared of being without support.