Very true, I was never good enough for him, he controlled who I could talk to, always on eggshells around and saw his rage when I left him 2 years ago and he's still trying to control me

Accurate to the ex-husband to a T. No longer living with the lies, drama, double standards, mailipulation, and the cheating. Thank God 🙏🙏

One way to know that you're dealing with a narcissist is when they take, and take, leaving you feeling depleted. Whereas, you'll receive less, and less or nothing in return. 💙KZfaqr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships

Many people have been conditioned to be financially dependent so that we don't leave.

I am definitely in the "their existence is triggering" stage.... Mentally and emotionally drained..... Stress related illnesses taking away my quality of life...... Need a financial miracle so I can remove myself from the situation. Coverts are just evil in my opinion but they think(and have everyone else thinking) they are "good guys".

Moral gatekeeper. So true.

This is one of the best videos you have done so far. Everything you explain here is spot on with the person I dated who discarded me. They spent way too much time explaining to me how much they hate drama, don't believe that things are black and white and that they are very open minded and all about love. Also, they told me everyone of their exes went crazy, but I know why. They finally started reacting to the emotional abuse and cray making from this person. I was triangulated, this all occurred. Completely true and I am super patient and understanding. It's like dating a spoiled child that has to get their way or they are going to blow up like child. Thing is, the NARC has to have supply, so they can get it from anyone and swap out people like they are flavors of ice cream that they get sick and tired of so they can switch out flavors until they decide they want that certain flavor again. They really are regressed to some part of their childhood or something.,

Narcissists are a walking contradiction - YES! all great points, Christina! RELIGION! holy cow! You would think i married a saint, but when I asked her to follow St. Paul's teachings of gentleness and kindness - she SCOFFS at it. what a damn hypocrite!

It's frustrating most of society doesn't realize there a women narcissist as well. So many other influences only mention men

Best narcissist defense #1) IGNORE THEM! It 100% works! At least, when you’re in process of regaining control over your situation/life. It’s also a very effective test, in the beginning, to find out if you are indeed, dealing with a narcissist. They absolutely cannot handle silence and being ignored. However, there is a danger in doing this, so use caution!

Walking contradiction, to be sure. You made that clear in this video! Thanks, Christina. Also, when the ex envied someone, he would comment on how outlandish/loud/attention-seeking, etc., that they were. Whether or not they were truly behaving that way, it was obvious to me that he HATED that THEY were getting the attention that HE wanted! Thanks, again.

1. Helping other old persons in the community vs never helping their own parents. 2. Isolating you vs Socializing themselves. 3. claims of simplicity vs materialistic tendencies. 4. having a family vs being a bottom gay. 5. for you to be available 24/7 vs themselves being absent when needed. 6. Prayers/religious practices vs sexual escapades. 7. Hating you vs befriending you. 8. wanting sex vs withholding it just because you want it too. 9. marrying vs sex with total strangers. 10. being good to you on your face vs tarnishing you behind your back. I feel no.10 has not been discussed enough in the mainstream. I would like a video on that. My narc is never bad to me on my face.

Narcissist 101. The first time I was discarded I found out from a mutual friend that she had her next supply on line. I made the mistake of confronting her with this fact, (even though I had previously told her that if someone else came into her life I would step aside), she blew up beyond belief! Then, in the first... And hopefully last.... hoover she explained how I really brought out her ill temper "which was so difficult and rare to do".

Yup when they were widowed I was there all the time, when I was widowed they said 'I just can't be there for you, but kept coming over. Now I understand they were seeking supply, even in the worst time of my life!

You are spot-on in your description of the covert narcissist and their double life. I fell for a man who coached at a very highly regarded parochial private school. These student body was made up of children of very wealthy families, some were children of celebrities. He was respected by the families, staff, and student body. Meanwhile, he was secretly seeing multiple women, leading each one to believe he wanted to get married. Always lying, manipulating, and hopping from bed to bed.

Perfectly described! As always, great job Christina!

You are very knowledgeable about this which makes me highly consider the trauma you’ve faced to learn this. It seems a lot of people are this way and aren’t even aware of it. Slightly disheartening, trying to find a new light to shine on forming relationships without the anxiety. The ego is a hell of a thing.

i like the title. Way better than a line from the DSM to introduce yourself as being able to understand all of the details as to how someone's personality works. The most confounding behavior that no one on the receiving end can understand is when one of them promises you that they will show up on a certain day at a certain time and then they don't show up at all with sometimes later only a flimsy excuse as to why they didn't show up when you ask them as to why while at the same time if you are ever try working for pay in any company owned by them or their relatives instead they will demand from you things like arriving 10 minutes early - Without ever telling you about that ahead of time before firing you because of the same. Just so they can later be reporting to the rest another incident proving how lazy and unreliable their targets are instead. And the rest on their list of unwritten down barter system rules would require a whole new thick book to read, if there was such a thing which doesn't exist anyway, to become successful there after inheriting all of the work there. Accountants who have been working in their lesser helping the money managing role see that sort of thing being done all the time. Another kind of gatekeeper is called the neighborhood gossips. The neighborhood gossips who are the first one to point out faults of any newcomer on the block after the newcomer doesn't take a piece of their advice. Like who or who all should be allowed to walk onto your property without calling you first.

These narcs are unbearable

Thank you for your videos! They are *super* helpful! If it weren't for KZfaq I'd never have identified the narcissist in my life. 👍

Thank you for a very accurate description of a narcisist. Spot on.

Everyone of your points are spot on. Have watched and listened to your videos for some months now. Seven months out. Thank you for your insight and wisdom. Sharing this info means a lot to victims. A combination of your videos and a selective group of others took me from the brink. This one is particularly excellent. Childhood trauma is a real issue that gives this personality a way in, to your soul, manipulation. You are a great communicator, thanks for this. ❤️

Hey Christina! I agree with everything you said! Except for some kind of miracle from God the narcissist will never change! I find it best to just be polite to them and completely ignore everything they say! Do your own thing and don't waste your time arguing with them! Thank you so very much! May God bless you!!

I had to laugh at the very first one, they hate drama! She said that all the time, yet she brought so much drama and chaos into my life. I still can't believe that I allowed myself to be in a relationship like this. I left though... But still the damage is done.

I must say, I found your channel as I obviously perceived I was with a narcissist. I've drawn MANY comparisons, especially with covert. Went through the twin flame concept, which honestly on my end was and still is real. Now after 3 months, Im still completely devastated and after being through several love and lost relationships, my feelings haven't budged. I've actually written an Amazon book/short story thinking it would be therapeutic, Ive read my own writing about a 1000 times. If i were subjective, I'd read it back and say what the hell are you doing lol? I'm very seriously considering a booked session with you. Thank you for sharing your knowledge.

*Respect & Gratitude Ma'am

When mine left abruptly on June 10, he said I was negative and he couldn’t stand the hateful drama when I had said and done nothing no arguments nothing! Yet this man was a nattering nabob of negativity. Every time somebody would work in the yard or any of his friends he was always criticizing them being very critical and negative And couldn’t look in the mirror about this.

God bless you...and your family... Joshua sills

hi! Glad you're still making videos on this subject. Cheers

At 'breakup'... "Nobody will ever want you" and "You will be betraying me if you find someone else" and only later (and after I learnt about narcissim) I noticed what a contradiction those statements (alone) was, and yeah also said the "you'll never be good enough.... etc" . I believed it all back then... I remember I felt like I was gonna d£e. Ive come along way since through the painful recovery and adapting to a "new normal"... I'll probably never be the same.

This is all so true! Thank you Christina 🥰 GB

Oh my goodness! You are describing my soon-to be ex-husband to a tee! Thank you for your videos! So validating!

What a great title for the video!

Your channel describes my husband 100% and I can't leave him even though he's destroying my mental, emotional and physical health because I suffer from mental health issues and am scared to death of being alone.

Hello thank you so much for all the great advice! Lack of EQ, all for regulation! Hard pass!

Gosh so relatable .

Great video thank you!

Everyone is a narcissist modern day.

Great words, Thanks! It is eye opening

Very Beautiful 🖤❤️🖤❤️🖤

This is terrible, absolute 💯 . Let’s do a live webcast

Hi Christina...should I, confront my Enabler wife ( Arranged Marriage ) of 12 years about my Narcissistic Mother...with all sincerity?? We have 2 boys...and i fear that they will both grow up feeling Worthless...which I could not bear. We (Me, My Narcissistic Mother, my Gaslit Father..who has more or less become a Narcissist towards me and is a HUGE enabler, my wife and our 2 boys...11 and 8 ) all live together...and the option of me and my boys moving out is nowhere in sight as we are financially drained...and now ( for the last year or so ) my mother has gone on an all out smear campaign and I am unfortunately loosing any support that I had... from the extended family (both sides)...which was already Very less to begin with....What should I do?? Please Help 🙏🙏

Could someone with bpd also exhibit this same behavior ?

🙂

This has nothing to do with your video, but what masters program would I need to do to help other survivors from narc abuse? Psychology?

💜♾🙏🏼🕉

Toxic

Hey Christina!! I hope you’re doing well!! 🙏♥️

I'm going to disagree with you agreeably when you say narcs using the Bible. They're liars.

i like the title. Way better than a line from the DSM to introduce yourself as being able to understand all of the details as to how someone's personality works. The most confounding behavior that no one on the receiving end can understand is when one of them promises you that they will show up on a certain day at a certain time and then they don't show up at all with sometimes later only a flimsy excuse as to why they didn't show up when you ask them as to why while at the same time if you are ever try working for pay in any company owned by them or their relatives instead they will demand from you things like arriving 10 minutes early - Without ever telling you about that ahead of time before firing you because of the same. Just so they can later be reporting to the rest another incident proving how lazy and unreliable their targets are instead. And the rest on their list of unwritten down barter system rules would require a whole new thick book to read, if there was such a thing which doesn't exist anyway, to become successful there after inheriting all of the work there. Accountants who have been working in their lesser helping the money managing role see that sort of thing being done all the time. Another kind of gatekeeper is called the neighborhood gossips. The neighborhood gossips who are the first one to point out faults of any newcomer on the block after the newcomer doesn't take a piece of their advice. Like who or who all should be allowed to walk onto your property without calling you first.