No I'm not debating your favorite black manosphere figure with 3000 subs and a bunch of videos about "gynarchy" stop asking.

I was fascinated reading your interpretation of Attack on Titan. I had no idea that there were fans who supported Eren's decision. I watched the anime with my wife and sister, and all three of us were utterly horrified, and found ourselves looking back at all the warning signs, all the red flags, and found that the earlier episodes felt completely different when we looked at them in that light. In fact the entire story for us seemed to be an exploration of the inevitability of genocide as a response to previous genocides. Oppression as a response to previous oppression. Eren had so many chances to walk away from all of the violence and just be with his friends, but was so devoted to his path of destroying all his enemies that even when the enemies changed from Titans to humans, he continued to pursue the very same goal he spoke of in the very first episode. I honestly don't see Eren as an aspirational figure whatsoever, and his arc feels more like a cautionary tale against bitterness in response to trauma. If anything, he exposes the monster beneath every person that seeks to take revenge against the society that harms them.

Im a black female who did not grow up with ANY men and never really spent any time with men as I became an adult, let alone discuss important male centered topics. I really appreciate your videos. You allow me to see not only a male perspective, but a black male perspective which for me, is invaluable. You speak from a compassionate, fair, well rounded, and understanding position to deliver engaging, thoughtful and thought provoking content that I find highly valuable.

Guts' from Berserk is a GREAT example of a story destroying hegemonic masculinity. From conquerors to just near physical gods like Guts the protagonist, the masculine urge to just destroy everything that isn't you while subsuming everything else will NEVER fill the void of insecurity and lack of love. The entire story of Berserk is a love letter to letting go of bitterness and embracing the things that matter most. When someone burns your house down, you rebuild and help your loved ones. You then build better systems to prevent it from happening again. You do not go abandon your loved ones, let hate consume you and go out on a quest to destroy the people that burnt your house down. This is the gist of Berserk's story and morale.

I really want to take some time to thank you. I'm a 25 yo Mexican man. I think Black culture and Mexican culture have a lot of similarities. Especially in the toxic masculinity aspect. I have always struggled with my masculinity because I'm a 6"2' brown man and as such some things are expected from me by society. Since I was a child I have always been very sensitive and emotional. In my culture that's not acceptable. A man with my appearance can't show emotion, they tried to beat it out of me, so it was really difficult for me being the way I am. Thinking I was wrong for being like this, thinking I was a failure because my father rejected who I am. I'm not here to vent, I'm here to properly thank you for your content because since I discovered it I have learned a lot from your culture, your struggles and the way black men handles them. I have come to learn a lot of things about myself because I can relate to many things. But the most important thing is that I don't feel alone anymore in this quest of bettering myself and finding more responsible ways to cope with what I have lived. I want to be a better man and a better human being. Your content has given me so much man that I can't put it to words. You reach people and places you don't even imagine. Thank you so much.

"It's not hard to shit on chuds... or call out assholes doing asshole things... what we don't have is analysis... and useful engagement." "There's been very little intentional guidance." Never stop making these videos, collaborating with the people disrupting this space, keeping conversations going and calling out unhelpful behavior. The comparison to being not racist VS being anti-racist was a clear analogy.

The argument from JP that "the western civilazation is the best because people are moving here" is akin to "I am a better human because all those people whos money I stole and houses I burned are moving out from their burned houses and coming to my area seeking money. It must be that my founding principles are valid!"

A year or 2 ago I met a guy online who was deep in this red pill/ Manosphere thing and it made me uncomfortable. The moment he brought up the red pill and how Andrew Tate was his “guy”, I kind of pulled back a bit but I was curious (thankfully so) and continued to talk to him. We didn’t have much in common except maybe anime but Along the line we got into how he ended up with those ideologies and the whole red pill things and he told me how he felt emasculated as a teen. He has a baby face and I guess was a late bloomer. He felt isolated and became a “Gabe” and “degen” (degenerate) as he called it. He was depressed and would stay in bed all day, watch anime or porn and just masturbate. Eventually like the others he came across Peterson and started working out religiously, got more into Christianity and had this whole thing of being more outspoken which was commendable but talking to these people, you can (dare I say) feel the off energy or vibe, like the one Peterson gives when he talks. His new found routine and all was nice and talking about how men were going through a lot but like others in this space he would end up on how western women are bad and the reason for the men’s suffering in a way. We don’t talk anymore but I did feel empathy for the fact he felt less of a man in regards hegemonic masculinity and social hierarchy but like F.D said, these men are the problem but often want to assimilate instead of deconstruct. I don’t blame him for how he he thinks but I know it isn’t healthy and eventually he’s going to run into problems. The last time we spoke I remember him telling me how he felt down because he was returning to his old ways of being in his shell and neglecting this routine he had for himself and not that those are bad but I feel like his reason behind these things might be misplaced. Idk I might be taking him out of context but watching this made me gain more empathy for this demographic (although meeting people with this ideology face to face it’s harder to hold fast to that empathy) and reevaluate the content I’ve been engaging with especially on tik tok. I think it was Khadijah Mbowe thst said it was time to move past the “men are trash” era of the 2010s and I agree. Although finding that balance of calling out this harmful behavior and being more understanding, accommodating and overall most of the emotional Labour already. So idk what that would look like. In conclusion the final thought part of this video is something people need to think about, I included. We’ve called out the bad parts what next? I can’t speak for the picking up girls or talking to girls part of the male experience or struggle in leftist spaces but I think creating a community is a place to start. Being around people who want to change and one could maybe even develop better deeper friendships. Idk this was an unorganized ramble of my final thoughts on the 2 parts but I have a lot to think about after this. Great video

Said it before, but as someone literally injecting estrogen, I support the testeroine injection that is The Northman. Great movie, as is this video! Thank you FD for constantly being amazing.

DUDE YES! THANK YOU for this, I got sucked into the manosphere myself trying to impress my dad who hated women, especially his wife, my Mother. Notice how I give him the respect he earned in giving me the first example for how men should treat women, and their wife especially? My first message in life from my own dad was, "women are horrible, don't be one or dad(men) won't like you". He was a big rush limbaugh fan starting when I was about 10 and ever since he started listening, his violence toward my mom only increased to the point where she tried to file for divorce and escape, only to be told she's insane and a "bad woman" by her doctors and my dad's conservative cult family (literally pro white nazi). She ended up coming back on heavy meds only to be beaten, abused and blamed more. Long story short, died in my dad's "care" from morbid obesity and cancer "just to finally get away from him". F this toxic psycho nonsense.

This is a great essay as usual! I had a slight issue with the example of bisexuality to show how men aren’t allowed to differ outside of the strict rules of masculinity. Men aren’t more willing to be with bisexual women just because they’re more accepting of differences within women. It’s because bisexual women are sexualized heavily by men and often times men see that dating bi women means they’ll get to have threesomes with other women. This is something bi women have complained about for years.

That Eren Yeager quote upsets me not only because it's flat-out vile, but it also doesn't make any sense. How are you supposed to destroy the cycle of hatred and revenge, if you're committing acts that come from hatred and revenge itself? Not only does that make him a repulsive hypocrite, but it also proves that he has no idea what he's talking about.

Unc, I remember you mentioned being worried that this manosphere series might be getting bloated & I just wanna say, this felt perfect. Genuinely. I know they're already coming for you in the comments and as annoying as that probably is, it's a good sign - It means the right people are being reached. And with the empathy you have showed & continue to show them, many will respond well to your message. I also really liked the call to action for the left & Shark's comparison between anti misogynist & anti-racist rhetoric. It feels like a challenge to us male & masc creators, and we all need that if we want to work towards actually addressing this problem, because ultimately, it's on us to solve. #HealthyBoyzOnly #HBOMax

Every time the subject of spree shooting and misogyny comes up I always think about Polytechnique. This was a Canadian mass shooting of women by a male shooter in 1989. On the anniversary of the shooting, like clockwork, media here likes to say 'We don't know why he did what he did. So many questions' when it was explicitly written in an anti-feminist manifesto by a shooter that specifically targeted women and told them all as much before he killed them. It's frustrating that explicitly misogynist, racist, bigoted shooters are treated by the mainstream media like a mystery and their motives are somehow 'not understood' when they were shouting it from the rooftops well before.

Man struggles with fitness test: that man shouldn't be in the army Woman struggles with fitness test: women shouldn't be in the army

A manga that takes a genuine, deep, and multi-faceted look at masculinity, what it means to be masculine, and how masculinity deals with emotions and trauma, is Berserk. I've checked your channel and see that you haven't covered it. It's very much worth a read (or three), even if it's not something you cover on your channel. As someone who studied literature in uni, I classify it as one of the greatest pieces of fiction written (and drawn); I make that statement devoid of hyperbole. The first few chapters paint the protagonist, Guts, as an edgelord, but the manga goes into deep detail showing how he got there and, more importantly, how he grows from there. Here's perhaps one of my favorite quotes from the entire manga which, once you've read the first few chapters truly illustrates Guts' growth: "I thought, never again. Never again could I watch the sunset and be this calm. Never again could I sleep the night through."

Been thinking about this for a few years, as a large guy born into a Hispanic household. I was often made fun of by the family for bring more sensative and not presenting enough "masculinity" and it really hurts to see how much it has affected not just me but many of my friends ability to grow as ppl.

This is the best video you’ve ever made FD. As a “femme” gay man it’s so confusing to navigate through the world trying to figure out how my expression of masculinity fits. Even though I have long hair, wear makeup, hang out with the girls, and dress in a non-traditional way, I know I’m a man and I identify 100% with masculinity. One of my good friends always jokingly refers to me as “sis” or “she” and it always bothers me so much, because I’m not she!! I’m he!! I’m me! And while it is annoying, I understand where she’s coming from because the only representation of masculinity that’s she’s familiar with is the hedgemonic masculinity that you referenced in this video. So to her, and the majority of people I interact with daily, if I’m not that, I must be “one of the girls”. But I’m not one of the girls. I’m a man and I wholeheartedly embrace my masculinity, even if my expression of it does not fit with the prototype we are provided with. I think your content is so important because you so unashamedly embrace masculinity and articulate the thoughts that so many of us have in a way we never could.

really happy to find you man. You are smart, nuanced, and empathetic. You don't speak in extremes. The more people that brush up against this type of content, the better discourse will be for literally any topic.

As a black man raised in rural area in ohio. I have been lost for years in the manosphere trying to fight against who I am and what I believe is right and I managed to get out and I have been a progressive ever since and I'm trying to find my way. I appreciate pt 1 and 2. This has connected many of the questions I've had about why society is the way it is. Thank you!

Watched it on Nebula (& you should to!) & I don't wanna spoil too much but I never realized how insidiously benign the manosphere seemed until BOOM - you in some dim lighting with a microphone spitting Misogynoir

As a woman who served in the army, it's laughable when I hear men who's only concept of what the military is like is from movies say that women have it soooo easy in the military. Being a woman in the military is a gd nightmare. I had to do less push-ups to pass the pt test, but that is faaaaar from the only thing that matters or that is experienced in the military.

“I’m not asking those of us with the most to lose to carrying the further burden of fixing men. I’m asking for your support and patience in allowing me and other men to do that for ourselves.” Maybe the most important line through the video in my opinion. Being a cis man surrounding himself in predominately queer spaces, I hear the grievances being made by my friends of marginalized genders, speaking on the issues of men, and I obviously never felt personally attacked by it, but after hearing it so often, it kind of hits you like a guilt of sorts. I identify heavily with Foreign Man in a Foreign Land in wondering weather I should present less masculine, as masculinity is given increasingly negative connotations. I don’t need to be given the benefit of the doubt, I just want the opportunity to prove myself.

I'm a black trans man in Europe and somewhat early into my transition (2 years, 7 months of which have been on testosterone, so I am starting to be read as male in my daily life). It's really hard to figure out what being a man really means without coming across this manosphere nonsense or crusty gender roles that always repulsed me. I certainly understand why men and boys feel a void because I sometimes feel it as well. I basically always knew 100% what I am not but it took a lot of work to figure out what I am. Can definitely see why young men in search of purpose get sucked into this spiral. Especially if you don't want the "work, eat, sleep, find partner, have 2,5 children and a dog [if you can afford it], work, die" hamster wheel and have to figure out what you want to do instead.

Me: "I just don't feel like paying attention to an entire movie for an hour and a half. Also me: "Oooh 3 hours of critical analysis! Let's go!"

I have had a lot of negative men interactions. From sexual harassment as a preschooler. To being locked in a closet at my first job by a man 4 times my age for him to grope me, to a casual harassment but more men I can count, to the man who broke into my apartment at 2am to rape me. To the female friends I’ve had rapped and murdered by men. For the two times I was passed over from promotions and told it was because although I was better at the job they ‘needed a man’ in the role. I have fought so hard not to hate men but it’s genuinely really hard. And when roe was over turned I to my great shame went online for about a week and rampantly attacked men. All the fear and helplessness I’d felt towards men my whole life came pouring out of me. But your video have been helping me to come back from that. I want to practice radical empathy. It’s the best way to move forward for all of us. But fuck it’s hard. A huge part of me hates men to a degree I can’t even describe. Boy do I understand the spree shooters desire to just go out and murder a bunch of people because boy do I want to kill a lot of men sometimes. It’s so easy to see the monstrous behavior of so so so so so so many men. And the failings of even ‘good’ men who seem to be perfectly happy stepping over the bodies of dead women just so they don’t have to make any effort. And it hurts. And it hurts when you are told the solution is to to more labor for these people who everyday just want to hurt and abuse you. Which as a construct men do because that’s patriarchy. But again you are reminding me constantly that individual men just like individual white peoples can be reached. That so many man do support women and roe and their communities. That’s most of us are intact in this together. I’m not ok doing work for men. Fuck men. But I will for my husband, for my male students, for my male family members, for my male friends, for my neighbors, for the guy in the grocery store struggling with his kids while he shops, for the construction worker laying new infrastructure down the hill. I guess what I’m saying is let’s all try and do as much good as we can for those around us and slowly expand our communities to encompass as many as we can as we go along. Maybe I can’t fight for ‘MEN’ right now but I can fight for my men, and slowly I’d like to add to that. Maybe we can all slowly add to our groups.

"some of us dont know how to define, perform, and embody masculinity without the toxic elements we agree shouldnt be there" honestly this hit so hard as a transmasc person too. great video!

I love the way The Northman actually did have a queer or at least clearly gender non-conforming character, but it flew way over people's heads. The shaman character was played by a male actor, but this role in society was usually strictly for women ("seidr" magic was considered a woman's art and was a gift of the goddess Freyja). What's more, the actor was completely dressed in traditional women's clothing!

Attack on Titan is imo pretty slippery when it comes to the question if its message is supporting fascism or not, from my perspective, the moment Eren decided to wipe Liberio, he became an irredeemable villain. To me, the final seasons of AoT signified the world that is drenched in hatred to the point where both sides are almost kind of justified at starting and fighting in the conflict, the problem being how to stop this cycle of this unnecessary violence. Like, you constantly see moments in this show, where bitter enemies start to humanize each other and despite the past come together, but you can never shake that awful feeling of the taint being put on everyone involved, like everyone who comes out at the top are not winners, but just lucky survivors, like at that point, no fascistic ideology has won, you're just left with broken people standing in the ruins, doomed to repeat the horrors of the old world.

Really enjoyed editing this one! Alot of long nights and getting things right, but well worth it, hope you all enjoy this masterclass in moving us forward!

I usually only view content from fem creators. I do this in order to shield myself from covert misogynists but I am so glad I found you. Having a wide range of perspectives can be hard in a world where people are often polarizing and sometimes outright hateful when addressing anything that they are not comfortable with. It can be very hard to find men's content that is not insidiously misogynistic- and therefor emotionally damaging for me to consume. I struggle with this fact because while I want to preserve my mental health I also need to hear perspectives from all demographics including men. Thank you FD signifier. So far your videos have been exceptional and I hope to see more great content from you in the future.

Thank you from a black female viewer here! I actually saw my husband who's a very good and kind man slipping into watching some of those kinda videos a few years ago. It definitely started with Gary Vee and then spiraled but stopped just short of Samuels. I could tell he was just looking for guidance and I was able to have a chat with him about why he wasn't going to find it in these guys. He quit watching that stuff and has really begun to step into defining his masculinity for himself - Its beautiful! Note: I also want to point out that there is some level of this that happens within the black protestant church also...see Jerrod Carmichael's Home Videos for an example. I can't help but wonder about the impact of similar, yet far less controversial voices like ET the hip hop preacher.

Thank you for the section on “What the Left needs to do better”. THAT is the part that is missing heavily. When you leave young boys to fend for themselves out of fear of not seeming feminist leaning enough, it makes it easier for the wrong messengers and harmful rhetoric to be the loudest…

Abba and Preach hurt my soul fr. I was looking specifically for black male content creators, and I thought they seemed kinda cool. But to your point, I felt like as a black woman I was part of their punching bag, and the 'I'm just being real' was code for 'yeah, women have a place and it's not on my level'. It was sickening because it was 'covert'.

"I am asking for your support and patience in allowing me, and other men to [fix men] for ourselves" Damn that's the message that needs to come across to both sides. The men who need to work to improve themselves and the community of men, and the groups who (rightfully) take issue with the current presence of masculinity in our society.

Love what was brought up about bi men. I’ve totally experienced that one woman saying I’m not her type bc “she supports lgbtq+ people but she only likes manly men” (where she clarified having sex with other men wasn’t manly). Another lady I was with said she didn’t like me being bi bc she had to be suspicious of me around both men and women, to which I recognized the double red flag I was presented with and dipped from that relationship.

Thanks again! You are doing great work!

"If you know anything about trans people, you know there's a high suicide rate" You're not wrong, I just wish this wasn't such a core component of the trans experience. I weep for my siblings going through it. We are gonna make it.

Love the video, thank you for taking the time to make it! It's crucial for your voice to be heard 💯

i’m a 22 y.o. white girl and honestly these videos are so essential for my learning and understanding of peoples lives and point of views. these aren’t things that i have had to struggle with so having someone take the time and break down the pipeline makes having conversations with manosphere people so much easier. i want to have a well rounded view on how we all as humans got to this point and be an essential part of fixing the problem, not in a white savior kind of way, but i understand that i might be able to reach people if i’m coming to them with empathy and they might realize, oh you’re a woman and you actually care about my feelings. ya know? i’m quickly becoming a big fan of your work! thank you for all the time and effort you put into your videos it truly means so much. keep up the awesome work

I'm a Black woman and I can absolutely give you, and other men like you, grace to do this work. I know full well I cannot, I cannot be the one that gets leaned on and drained of the energy I require to care for myself and my child. I have firmly believed for some years that this work does need to start with men aiding, assisting, and just straight up being nicer to other men. When a man embarrasses another man in public and women laugh, it is the women that become the villains in that origin story because kindness among men is not an expectation. I want so badly for it to be so I will gladly step out of ya'lls way, and even support you from behind as you get it done. Much love to you.

Love your stuff, as a white hetero male in his mid-30s I found myself really enjoying your deconstruction of the "manosphere" as you call it. (Never heard the term until this video!) Since childhood, I have experienced far too many white male role models telling me to "toughen up." After watching your content, I realize that the constant pressure in sports, school, and life to be a certain way is just ultimately a defense mechanism to resist change, or re-capture something perceived as lost. I remember being told to "toughen up" since I was 7. I was 6ft at the time (yes really), so the local football team that my step father made me join stuck me with the older kids, all well into middle school. He just saw a big male body to get hit, what he got was a kid who liked playing pretend with action figures and struggled with understanding the point of optional competition. I got brutally picked on by my older teammates but I kept at it. I ran the drills, went to every practice, busted my butt, yet could not understand why I needed to hit the guy in full armor in front of me. I wanted to quit, but the pressure I felt from my step-father AND father to keep going stopped me from saying how I really felt. You could see it their eyes, the pride they felt to have any attachment to a "strong young man who's so tough they put him with the big kids." I was reliving their lost glory days for them. Something they couldn't do, despite how much they wanted it. Long story short, its the night of my first game with the whole family watching. They are calling numbers and introducing each player. My number comes up "Number 73...", I walk through my teammates, and one of them trips me so I fall flat on my face in front of everyone. Stuck me on the bench the whole night. One of the most scarring & embarrasing moments of my life. I quit the next day and I could feel the disappointment in their voices. Took a lot of growing up and therapy to work through it. If you read this far thanks for taking the time to read my little memory! Also F.D., if you're the signifier, then are your awesome shirts the "signified?" 😉

I'm so grateful for your channel. You ability to address some of the most pertinent issues in our lives yet also connect it with some of the most intellectually dense resources is amazing. I'm truly inspired by your work.

This is one of my favorite works from Uncle Fiq, its how he is able to provide well analyzed, meaningful incites and empathetic ideologies all while showing his introspection also how empirical his work is. This is the type of content I love consuming and hopefully make. Awesome Job as always.

“dopamine dicktox” sounds like the next mens self help community buzzword - amazing video as always

One fictional character I’m surprised has not been brought up that’s popular with edgelords is The Punisher

I’m so glad I found your channel. I really needed it. I was starting to feel like I didn’t have a place on the left, that we had suffered some real brain drain and were ceding so much to the right. Thanks for all you do!

You have quickly become one of my favourite KZfaqr over the past couple of days! The content is very thought provoking and I feel like I get to look back at myself more objectively Thank you

I found myself getting really caught up in this pro masculinity movement to the point I was starting to hate myself for not being able to keep up with who I thoughtI should be. Very glad to find this video when I did

I am a female therapist who has a fair amount of male clients and I've seen all of this (the isolation, despair, and frustration to name a few emotions but they are attracted to the manosphere) in them and I'm genuinely so thankful for this perspective. I've been saying similar things to my colleagues and I've found that so many of them are stuck in space where they can't hear men. There is so much shame around what it means to be a man or be masculine and it really is through challenging what it means to be a man (usually I get strong, protective, stoic, and brave as answers) allows men to be themselves (and be "masculine" if that's what feels good to them) without shame.

It was important for me to see your vids, FD. You are one another raindrop in a bucket, that can be the last drop needed for some. Keep on doing these, man. Cheers, and thank you.

Amazing. This is literally the cultivation of deep study and research to assist us in ending this chaos and fixing the problem once and for all. Keep it up

This video was certainly a “beacon to get the fuck out”. I’m so grateful that you put together such comprehensive ideas that unpack this depressing and seductive space we call the manosphere.

1:31:23 As a transmasc person: THIS THIS THIS. THIS SENTENCE RIGHT HERE HITS HOME. I never got sucked in misogynist spaces…it was actually the opposite. I’ve spent a loooooottttt of time in feminist, leftist spaces-which has definitely been really helpful in many ways-but the way many people discuss “masculinity”/“men” in those spaces led to a lot of self-hatred and I’ve had an incredibly difficult time accepting that I could be in any way “male aligned”. Your channel has been a godsend, I’m not even kidding. I’m so grateful for this positive space to engage with these kinds of topics.

I appreciate how your messages are simultaneously broad and consistent. There is no skeleton key, but the fact that you remain consistent with your diagnoses alludes to "an answer". I respect and hope to emulate the form of empathy you portray. I hope to be able to dive deeper into the source of the problems that we face as i tour your past and future projects. Thank you for all that youve done and will do

One of the things I’m most ashamed of was buying into the bad faith argument that if people would just stop seeing themselves as victims…they would be successful. There are ethical ways to make money certainly, but a lot of the guru advice seems centered around transitioning from being exploited-to becoming an exploiter yourself. There’s something incredibly insidious about telling people to stop complaining when they begin to figure this out-and that the system is actually good. “You have the tools; you have the opportunity; you just need to work harder.” It’s now become normalized for people to have 2; 3; even 4 jobs; maybe a side hustle or two. And if anyone stops and says “Remember when we could get by with one job per person? Remember when we could get by with one job per HOUSEHOLD?” they are labeled as lazy, entitled, and viewing themselves as a victim. But…they ARE a victim! Most of us are.

I think it’s interesting when you compare Eren to Thorfinn from Vinland Saga. Eren’s mother was taken from him, so he eventually decided to take everyone’s mother away from them. He wanted everyone to suffer like him. Thorfinn’s father was taken away from him and he eventually decided he’d never inflict the same cruelty on another soul, and instead help others so they’d never suffer the same way. Eren even grew up with friends who cared about him and still chose hatred and violence. Thorfinn grew up with no one and still chose peace and love.

I remember when chapter 139 first came out before the additional 7 pages where Eren's violence ultimately did nothing. The most visceral reaction was actually those of female Korean fans. They saw Isayama's unapologetic fascist sympathy of the last chapter and he was not condemned. He was celebrated by Armin and the others as a tragic figure. They could connect Isayama's fascist sympathies to the oppressive history Japan has had on their culture. And that made them mad as fuck, as they should've been. AOT at its final chapter did not condemn Eren at all and that made Korean fans drop it at its final legs. American fans were mad too. But not for the right reasons. They thought Eren didn't go far enough, and became even more enraged when the additional 7 pages came out. They thought Armin's anti-rumbling sentiment was pussy soyboy shit. They fell for fascist propaganda, to put it lightly, and were mad when the story wasn't fascist ENOUGH.

Thank you for making this and thank you for putting it out into the world. This is a topic that is not addressed at all, and I'm so happy to have found you and your content. You're the first person I found to be addressing these issues on a serious and constructive level. You are doing absolutely incredible work that is going to help so many people. I really hope that you do publish this paper one day (You mentioned it was part of your thesis research). Academia is not kind, nor is it accessible and the fact that you have put this out into the world, on a platform that can reach so many more people is truly a service to humanity. You've given me hope to see that people are striving to be more and to be better. And you're creating a space and providing tools for folks to learn. Thank you.

found the first part yesterday and watched this one today, and love them. Very grounded, great use of connell. Absolutely going to follow and see what more I can learn/hear from you. Cheers!

As a gay trans man who spent a lot of years trying to live as a straight woman, my relationship to masculinity is decidedly different from most men's--and yet, in some ways, not as different as one might think. I spent literal decades as a feminist activist. I had lots of gay and gender non-conforming guy friends and never once questioned their varied expressions of masculinity. But when it came to myself, I still had internalized an idea of manhood that was much more butch and mainstream. It was only after reading bell hooks' The Will to Change *for the second time* that I began to realize I was holding myself to a different standard than I was holding other men. When I first encountered trans men, in the early 90s, they were literally bodybuilders, construction workers, and cowboys. All of them straight. And a decade later, there were a lot of young trans men who were skater boi types, white hiphop fans, espousing all kinds of misogyny in an attempt to be accepted as men. I'd gone the other way and tried harder to be a "real woman". As a society, we need some kind of rites of passage for people to explore their gender. And we need ways to affirm the value of men that recognizes forms of masculinity that are healthy. For all men and masculine folks--but especially for Black men. That's not easy to figure out, but videos like this are a good start. Thank you.

My daughter (we're in Astralia) got sucked into the manosphere! Through a boyfriend who was into it deep. It affected us all. She's out now!!

Damn your channel has been so amazing and educational. Thank you for doing what you do

F.D., I stumbled on your site by chance and have found your videos to be so insightful and appreciate the in-depth critical analyses you provide with reference material available. Am a fan of your content!

It wasn't until recently that I realized just how heavily these masculine traits are socialized in childhood. It's nuts. And it starts at such a young age. My first memory of this was when I was in the first grade. My mom had gotten me a pair of Ugs. I remember being ridiculed for wearing what looked like something a girl would wear. I have a terrible memory. I can't remember anything from last month let alone 13 years ago (I'm 21 currently). The fact that this moment is one I remember so vividly really tells you how significant this moment was in my childhood. From that point on, I did my best to fit in as a man in society. I despised pink, I bottled up my emotions and avoided crying, and tried to appear stronger than I was. This was my life until my freshman year of college when it all just came crashing down. You can only bottle up your emotions inside for so long before it all just bursts out at once. Before this, I never thought (nor do I know) that I was an incel. However, I think I could've easily gone down the path of redpilling or even blackpilling myself. I thought there was merit to the argument that women only want "bad boys." I never progressed far into the manosphere, but I believe that is the first step most people take into it. Luckily I am in a good place today. Masculinity and gender more broadly are the reasons I've realized I'm non-binary. I never really felt like a man. That whole time I felt as though I was cast for the wrong part in a play that I was forced to do. Edit: Just some stuff I want to add to my original comment. I don't think masculinity is toxic in its entirety, just like FD outlined in this video. I just don't think even the non-toxic elements of masculinity really apply to me personally. Basically, I'm not non-binary because I hate masculinity, but researching the manosphere and gender helped me realize I was non-binary. You can be masculine and not be toxic. Being toxic isn't very cash money

I’ll never forget the final chapter panel of Eren Yeager crying in a puddle saying he wishes his not girlfriend would only love him forever and be alone till she dies. Truly a Manosphere icon. Fridged his own mom to motivate himself. Comfortable with genocide. Wants the only girl who cares about him to die alone. Really checking all the chad boxes.

I think real masculinity comes from serving humanity, not serving the self. But in order to do that we have to take care of ourselves, physically and mentally. Thank you for this great analysis.

Watching all your videos, you’re a great source of information! please don’t stop doing something special

Having worked a long time in suicide prevention, I saw the primal wounds a lot of men are carrying. There are men who genuinely believe they are fundamentally defunct, broken and weak and that has been cut into their psyche since childhood. The depth of self hatred, grief and compacted fear that is possible in men is something I think a lot of people completely ignore. The manosphere is one of the only places that is unashamedly celebratory of masculinity and they welcome men who have a deep need for acceptance by offering the illusion of control. If you have been forced to commit emotional self harm for decades, the idea that you can become a ‘high value man’ and therefore alleviate that pain and disconnection sounds pretty sweet. I really believe that men spiralling in this way is evidence that we have failed our sons for a long time. I am a dyed-in-wool feminist /and/ I think that if we don’t encourage spaces of masculine acceptance, celebration and divinity, we are limiting men to the worst versions of themselves and then punishing them for it.

So for my entire childhood, all the key figures in my social development were women. My mom, 2 sisters, my grandma, an aunt and all female cousins. I was the one man in my family besides my dad. But he had a stroke in my early teen years that essentially put him on the sidelines of my entire teen life up until his death last year. And all the women in my family were very traditional in their views on societal gender roles and how I should be acting as a man. They wanted me to fill the role of a stoic provider who didn't express himself. So once I started to become a leftist and recognize the roles of patriarchy in how we act, I always felt isolated because the solutions to these issues always came from a feminine perspective. Which isn't to say those aren't valuable perspectives, but to me personally they offered no real solutions to liberate myself from my internalized behaviors that were taught to me by women. There needs to be more discussion by men effected by the patriarchy for men effected by the patriarchy. There needs to be some positive male guidance that offers a more personal perspective than just reciting theory.

great video series (including the previous here) - really appreciate the time and thought put into this, provides an in-depth and grounded analysis that is informative, entertaining, and needed.

Thank you for including the chapters!

As a 30 year old Black man, Aba & Preach content constantly is being pushed to me. It took me months to realize that the manosphere was taking over my algorithm. I like them as creators but I stopped watching them consistently and also stopped clicking on all manosphere content. My KZfaq recommended section readjusted. I still want Aba & Preach to succeed because I think their conversations can be very nuanced and they are genuinely entertaining comedians, but I am tired of seeing the same talking points regurgitated over and over again.

The reason Peterson is so successful at being a gateway is because he speaks in story and allegory. People are unlikely to change their beliefs based on a debate between opposing side, however tell a story and the moral more easily passes into the subconscious because it alligns with a the narrative function of how we construct our identity. And even though stories don't portray their ideas by facts or internally coherent ideology, their message is portrayed and interrupted as universal truth which is seen as more timeless and trust worthy.

Excellent video top to bottom. Well done. Glad i found your channel.

The ending of this video is perfect! I'm nonbinary afab person who presents feminine and have had to work through A LOT of my own toxic masculinity. As i remove the toxicity its made me question my gender, wonder if maybe I'm fully a woman after all, but this helped me pin point the problem. Masculinity without the toxicity is something I've never seen or experienced externally before and not having any references has left me alienated from that part of myself and unable to recognize it internally. I don't have the experience of being seen and treated as male so i feel my experience of masculinity is invalid. I rely heavily on my femininity to navigate socially and struggle with feeling incomplete and unseen. I can't wait for you men and the rest of us who experience some degree of masculinity to move into healthy expression of that! There's alot of toxic shit to unlearn, but if what i experience internally as healthy masculinity is actually healthy masculinity for men too then its kinda bad ass and i love it! Good luck men and peopel with masculinity 🧡

Thank you for addressing Abba and Preach. People don't put them in the same group because they're not a full joke like fresh and fit. Because they're sometimes reasonable, they often get a pass

I consider myself very disconnected from traditional masculinity, my dad did a great job teaching me that I didn’t have to define myself through anyone else’s ideals. Later in life, finding the director Jodorowsky, solidified my idea that all we are is the limits we put ourselves in, and by expanding that, we can become infinite and understand infinitely. I’ve never considered how that philosophy has made me as happy as I am, this video did a great job outlining how those limits we put on ourselves can cause the mental illness we have that almost seems endemic among young Americans.

I LOVE that you identified this area that's lacking and you're trying to do something about it. Boys and young men need positive examples of healthy masculinity in online media. Thank you for lending your voice to this important area.

FD Signifier is great. Always enjoy your content, thanks for putting these massive videos together.

Yukio Mishima wrote a book called 'The Sailor that fell from Grace with the Sea', which was a book about the development of masculinity amidst the modernisation of Japan in the decades following the second world war. It follows a sailor who has to balance his attitudes toward masculinity: either embracing the ideal of himself as a lone, self-sufficient sailor or renouncing that ideal to settle down with the woman he loves. One of the main themes of the book is the masculine ideal of glory. The deep longing for a greater purpose or ideal (the sea) and the desire to have contributed meaningfully to something bigger than the self. To settle down in life, to compromise for your utility is a renunciation of that potential glory. There is no resolution to the sailor's dilemma but one of the more interesting things the book does is comment on the beautification of death (to die heroically is preferable to living with no sense of purpose) historically traditional in Japanese culture. When you mentioned the Northmen, I couldn't help but be reminded of this idea. It seems that men are trying really hard to find a sense of meaningful utility in the wake of a modern culture that doesn't need them to be. To go in search of some kind of masculine ideal to aspire to or to simply resign oneself to be of service, can often seem like the only two options for men to establish a sense of identity. The ideal of glory and death for the cause seems to be symbolic of this. To believe that there is a higher ideal to aspire towards, because simply living (with all the modern assurances) doesn't feel enough. It's no wonder the manosphere exists, it seems to be an attempt to cater to this problem.

OMG once you said Aba n preach i screamed. I'm so happy someone actually Sees it

Can't believe it took me this long to find your channel. Your description of conservative media utlizing othering is a theory I've held onto for a long time and you put it into a very digestible and succinct point. Keep fighting the good fight my guy.

Thanks so much for making this video, you put coherent words to a lot of thoughts that have been rattling around my head for a while. I was big into Tumblr in my early 20s, during its absolute heyday of popularity, and bashing on Men was and still is a big part of that subculture. I knew, intellectually, that I was a fairly rabid progressive, and that you can't expect people to do emotional and cognitive labor on behalf of people who don't give a fuck about them, but the absolutist black-and-white thinking of a lot of those voices left me saying "you're not wrong, but... that sucks" a lot. And it did do a real number on my self-image, immersing myself in that culture, I hated myself for being white, cis, straight/ace, and male for a long time. I think it's really important that there are people who take it on themselves to be that kind of radically empathetic that you're describing, and I try my best to always live by the principles of empathy while also refusing to excuse and accept shitty behavior, but you're absolutely correct: the rhetoric surrounding Men in progressive spaces is often really alienating to the average young man. If they're not already sort of intellectually committed to progressive ideals and personal improvement, I absolutely get why someone would be like "no, fuck this whole scene, actually". Having well thought out and presented discussions of why men and Men are not 1:1 with each other, and the importance of empathy and building community where it can be done, BUT VERY IMPORTANTLY ALSO that there's some shit that's just not acceptable is very very important. I've loved this huge, multi-hour manosphere breakdown so much. You're doing great work.

As a fan of Attack on Titan, I personally see the first seasons as laying down the basis for the fascistic turn that Eren/Paradis take, and for the last season to show how all this fascism is wrong, and the trully heroic thing is to reject fascism, racism and fight against both. I think that is encapsulated in the stories of Gaby, Falco, Reiner, Hanji and specially Armin... I am a super big fan of Armin btw. But you are right. There is a lot of people that see this side of the story as "heart-warming gibberish" and root for Eren, which I find to be crazy concerning. For quite some time I would go to youtube and watch videos of people declaring themselves Yeagerists, and defending Eren's actions. I always found that to be super sad, and it would amaze me. I think you are right to say that, even if the story tries to "disavow"/"reject" the ideas of Eren, a lot of people still identify and support them. Which fking sucks.

I’m glad you covered Aba and Preach. I used to be a fan of them, but I had to leave when I saw them deliberately ignoring empathetic points and specifically turning up the rage factor. It was getting untruthful. Glad to hear they’ve taken a step back

Your work is extremely important right now, and deeply appreciated!

Damn that was deep. I didn't know i needed to hear that. Thank you sir

Honestly I have to disagree with eren committing genocide as coming out of nowhere. Its pretty clearly shown that this is something he would do if he had the power. “If someone tries to take my freedom, I’ll take theirs first” is a quote when he stabs 2 men to death to save Mikasa. He says in episode 1 “I’ll kill all the titans, every last one” and when he learns titans are people he switched to the enemies of “humanity” aka the maryleans who have tormented the island of Paradis. In the last episode of season 4 part 2 there’s a council talking ab what to do with the subjects of ymir and they say hey we aren’t bad its just those island devils. The world wants to destroy Paradis. Thats how eren justifies trampling everything because if he doesn’t they’ll take his freedom. He won’t give them the chance so he enacts the Rumbling. All the stuff ab how he’s similar to spree shooters is accurate but it’s not like it came out of nowhere. Marley breaks the wall so Eren attacks Liberio. All the world’s military joins to destroy Eren and Paradis so he destroys the world.

most other videos about this topic that don’t go in depth just leave me feeling uncomfortable and sad by the end. but the analysis you provide always leaves me feeling hopeful for the future. + nothing but love for the people sharing their experiences in the comments. you’re making some of the best commentary content on this website rn. liking and commenting to hopefully boost it in the algorithm

Woah, this is one of the few essays on this site that elicit in me a sort of other-proudness for their content. Your insight and appeal to our humanity beyond the roles assigned by society is an unusual finding. Just discovered your content and I'm blown away by its depth. Keep the great job!

Ummmm this is the second video of yours I’m beginning to watch and it’s safe to say I’m going to binge your content for the next several days. I’m hooked. I love a good line of questioning and man you’re going right down my alley

I remember being a downtrodden, submissive little boy, and I totally see how someone could spin that pain into a facade of value through "masculinity," but at the same time I can look back on where I've come since, and at every turn I know I've been benefitted by avoiding the desire to appear "masculine." So I feel conflicted because I feel sadness for all of these men that have essentially been led to objectify themselves, but I also feel indignance at the negative effects they have on the world, the people around me, and me, especially knowing that it's possible not to fall into the manosphere pipeline. Especially now with the ubiquity of the internet, it's more of a choice whether or not you fall into the pipeline. I've known several people who understood the purposeful transgressiveness of the male creators they watched, but the security they felt from it overshadowed the slight discomfort they felt. There are two ways this can go: either the individual needs the manosphere less as a crutch and consequently leaves the community because of that underlying discomfort, or they slowly become desensitized to the misogyny, homophobia, classism, and often racism which accompanies all of the media they watch, and then for the foreseeable future they are an active member of the manosphere.

“Patriarchy is genderless” will be my slogan moving forward in all gender discussions. It not only validates the lived experience of different gender identities, it also makes room for everyone to (hopefully) share how patriarchy has affected them too. I will definitely be coming back to these last two videos. There’s so much great info

Love you brother. Appreciate your thoughtfulness. So happy I found you. Thank you.

Quality long-form content is rare on KZfaq. Thanks for a great video. Gave me a lot to think about.

ive been watchin aba and preach for years and I can verify with all the truth in my soul that your analysis is spot on. thank you for the different perspective. it was your video on dave chapelle that made really do some soul searching . im 38 bro with a strong sense of self and morality and that was the video that made me reverse course and recognize my own problematic behavior. if you read this I want you to know that your videos when watched with an open and objective mindset are powerful. the best way to describe it for me is like being blind for most of your life and waking up one morning with the ability to see everything in rich detail. I said all that to cheer you on, you're educating more people than u think.

As someone who transition from female to male about 8 years ago now I've always found it very difficult to relate to and engage with other young white men on these very topics. Discussions about oppression in queer/feminine spaces feel much more tangible and grounded in reality, "my boss treats me differently from everyone else and my coworkers have noticed too" "this regular customer won't stop touching me and flirting while I'm at work and it's super uncomfortable" "I've had to fight for months to get the healthcare I need because legal documents are not being changed" "I physically can't go to these countries/regions because they have a long history of killing or imprisoning people like me" "coming out has lost me my family and my job and I have to chose between going back into the closet or becoming homeless" "I AM homeless and none of the shelters in my area will take me in" and so on. Coming from that world and then talking to men who's biggest problems seem to be feeling lonely, or not understanding why they can't get/keep a girlfriend, or how they might potentially be passed up for an opportunity because of affirmative action or immigration, feeling like the world is beginning to work against them, feeling like they aren't making enough money and reaching enough self-imposed milestones... It's really no wonder "the left" struggle to take those issues seriously, especially when many of those same men will accuse us of simply having hurt feelings and nothing more. On multiple occasions now cis men have complained to me about trans people, using degrading slurs right to my face, not realizing the entire time that they're speaking with a trans person. Their biggest complaints are that we exist, and that they have to see and hear about us. I have no idea how to counter that without outing myself to someone who could potentially do me harm. Which is why I'm trying to get more perspective. I am sympathetic. Believe it or not dating is difficult for trans guys too, we often have a much harder time meeting expectations of masculinity. Depression and mental health are huge problems that men especially need to address in their communities. The entire world is changing, everyone on earth is adapting to something new right now. But it's hard to maintain that sympathy when these guys start blaming everyone else, and pushing harmful idealogies and agendas that make it to the supreme court, and reminiscing about "the good old days" when women had little-to-no autonomy and queer people hid themselves for fear of prosecution. When people start talking that way I have very little faith that they would hear anything I'd have to say, especially if it went against their already self-affirming world view. Apparently, american men only found out a couple years ago what a pronoun was and already there is anti-trans legislation sweeping through the south, including proposals to seperate trans children from loving and accepting homes. I've heard men whine about losing their freedom of speech to cancel culture while book bans in public schools are specifically targeting queer people in an attempt to erase our existence and treat it as a dirty taboo. Today millions of people just lost their right to a safe abortion. I have no idea how to reason with somebody who sees their own insecurities as something equal to or even greater than the oppression minorities are facing right now. As much as I would love to be a role model and someone safe to talk to, something which I have happily done for other trans men and questioning members in my community, it is HARD to do that for someone who already hates you and doesn't know why, as much as I recognise that it's something that needs doing...

1. I want to start out by saying that I am a huge fan and am supremely grateful for your content. Your content and Foreign Man in a Foreign Land's content continually make me think, unpack, sort, and repack what it means to me to be a man and specifically a Black Trans man of Mixed heritage in a world that not only is not built for me but that actively fights against me. You are a beacon of light Brother in a sea of darkness and I thank you for that. 2. I want to commend this video overall it was as usual put together with excellence and provides numerous resources and sources for those who care to engage that deep. You gave us a video covering what we need to do not only to breakdown and repute these bastions of hate but to provide a healthy alternative to them for a large amount of men old and young who are adrift and waiting for some guidance on what it means to them to be a man. A true example of naming and helping to address the problem.

Glad that discovered this channel along with Big Joel, Innuendo Studios and Shaun. All of you guys are great!