My new favorite sentence is “Hot Huns are selling steamed rice in the area.”

I love how most of the weird translations are at least somewhat related to actual history and then there's just a random rant about sausages in Vienna sprinkled in there

9:42 I can't believe 12 million fathers went to buy milk, this was a very tragic event for the children at the time.

"Hot Huns selling steamed rice in my area" sounds like a scam ad, I love it

This is just what teachers think Wikipedia is

it seems the milk industry is very important in this alternate google translate timeline

It's surprising how much history still happened after William Herschel destroyed the planet.

10:52 “Singapore was wet for at least two days” you could stick this one on any year and it’d be true.

i like how america and japan united to annihilate an entire island in the philippines

I love how the table of contents say "Don't worry" and "I'm sorry".

I like how periodically the translation is from a 1st person perspective, as if it's the journal of some immortal guy documenting history.

*Every death in this video:* Caligula, The Roman Empire (x2) Clodius Albinus (x1) Lug’s horse (x1) Duke William of Normandy (x1) England’s throne (x1) The Poles (x41,231,285) the Germans (x84,783,942) Mirovich (x1) Ivan VI (x1) The Planet [destroyed by William Herschel] (x8,028,912,630) The writer of the 1780s wikipedia article (x1) 40 people by Napoleon (x40) the Brienne Horse (x1) 5,000 French Corporals (x5,000) Slavs of Bosnia and Herzegovina (x3,224,965) 92% of all german Germans (x77,119,039) 17 million people (x17,000,000) Leyte (x2,626,970) Mikhail Gorbachev (x1) George Bush (x1) Bees sent to China to produce anal wax (x80,000,000 ig) more than 200,000 Washingtonians (x200,001) All but 2 of the U.S forces sent to Belarus (x1,429,998) *Total Death Toll:* 8,336,533,882 In memory of those we lost.. (reply if i missed anything that i should add *with a timestamp)*

6:05 William Herschel is the final boss of the human race

Wasn't a big fan of Slavery 1-8, but was pleasantly surprised by the ninth one. It's rare when a franchise finally gets their crap together after going for that long.

The headlines are the best part. Look at 1784. "Is hohoono"? "Don't worry"? "Holds his slave"? "Give birth"? "BETTER"? 😭😭

1:24 Oh, that's not smoke, it's steam, steam from the steamed rice we're having. Mmm, steamed rice.

5:24 “the habsburgs who were in good health” has me crying

As a Pole, I can confirm I am dead.

Randoms online: “Translation software is gonna take over your job soon.” Me, a translator: *loud, shrieking laughter*

Time traveler: Steps on an ant. The timeline:

FYI Sakha, also known as Yakut, is the language spoken in the Sakha Republic, in Siberia, Russia. (that's why it's written in Cyrillic)

Historian: "but it's not historically accurate" Google translate: "it's symbolic"

I’ve crossed the border between Uzbekistan and Norway. Definitely worth the trip!

Who would have known we went to space a lot earlier than expected. I'm very disappointed my history professors didn't bother telling us this

I asked AI to write a story using some of this as prompts Once upon a time, there was a great empire known as the Sun Empire. They had conquered many lands, but their reign was brought to an abrupt end when the Mongols invaded and conquered them. The Mongols were a powerful force, but their conquest was not without resistance. The Huns, who had once been defeated by the Chinese, saw an opportunity to reclaim their power by selling steamed rice in the area. Meanwhile, Napoleon was busy trying to procure milk. He had heard that he could get it from the Sun Empire, but now that it was under Mongol rule, he was forced to settle for only 2 tons of milk. This wasn't enough to quench his thirst, so he set his sights on another conquest. As he marched towards his next target, he came across a strange book. The book was covered in fruit, so Napoleon decided to paint it before putting it over the fruit. Little did he know that this book held the secret to conquering Venice, the city that had been conquered by Venice. Trajan, one of the great Roman emperors, was known for his love of gladiators. Legend had it that he had tears in his mouth every time he watched them fight. One day, he ordered 5,000 pairs of gladiators to entertain him, but he was left disappointed when they failed to impress him. In frustration, he asked the first bill to ask the question "Is the emperor a child?" The ambassadors of the emperor of Han had been sent to meet with Trajan, but they never arrived. It was said that they had been intercepted by Septimus Severus, who was on a mission to kill the usurper Clodius Albinus. This massacre was so brutal that it continued until the Roman army was defeated. In the end, Sotoru and William teamed up to spread the secrets of the feudal lords of England to the whole of England. They were so successful that Turkey and France both attempted to conquer Persia, but were ultimately unsuccessful. It was Venice, who had learned the ancient secret of conquering Venice, that ultimately triumphed.

[4:48] Least confusing italian war.

"And the Nazis are coming" Most ominous line here.

13:20 "The older one has been reborn", on the month of He will catch his slave

*ya know, I like to think that this actually happened in a alternate universe*

11:17 I literally DIED LAUGHING at that part.

"two people were not killed" I took this to mean that the population of Belarus was reduced to two due to this education.

6:32 the 14th anniversary

9:09 - The brilliant options of "I'm sorry" and "Wrinkle"

8:42 Well that's technically the truth

Thought this would be a bad day but now that this channel updated its immediately better.

6:01 Apparently, Slavery 1-8 weren't good enough

This is absolutely amazing. I love how like...we've got random space wars, the planet is destroyed and nobody cares, countries keep invading and/or retreating from themselves, the editor's strong opinion about Vienna sausages, and of course "Hot Huns are steaming rice in the area!" Also all the random subtitles on the side, like "He will catch his slave" "Don't worry" and "Better". What. XD I also noticed partway through that you'd been changing the fonts for the year numbers as you went along, to fit the era. I love when people put in extra little efforts like this. Awesome stuff. :)

cant believe slavery 9 is finally out, slavery 8 was so disappointing so i hope the new one is better

7:09 "He will catch his slave." Another He Lore.

As a Sakha, I feel honoured?

where do i buy steamed rice from the hot huns?

A few of the things that were read incorrectly: - Caligula is the Roman _Empire,_ not the Roman Emperor. - The Vesuvius volcano either: started growing backwards in time 17 years ago and ended 79 years ago. It did not grow from 17 to 79 years old. - Septimus Severus killed the usurper, rather than being killed _by_ him. - There are developments in the field of middle class housing in Europe. They didn't just develop on their own. - People afraid of sausage didn't migrate from Vienna to Frankfurt, but emigrated out of both those cities. - Castro didn't set a Guinness World Record by being able to sell his clothes. The quantity of takas for which he could sell it is a world record holder. No idea why over 100 takas collectively hold a Guinness World Record, but that's how it is. And some miscellaneous thoughts: - Just because Wales wasn't part of the legal system, doesn't mean it was illegal. The legal system was just ambivalent regarding Wales before. (Similar to how someone who has poor vision but isn't legally blind, doesn't get arrested for illegal blindness) - A diet is like a parliament or senate of sorts, so apparently they secretly passed a law to secularise the country. - Putin probably gave his personal _firearms_ to China, not the ones attached to his body.

Rest in peace Poland Leyte and Germany you will be missed.😢

“Hot Huns selling steamed rice in your area” 1:31

immediately clicked on the video because i remember drawing the mongols conquering the solar system in ela class.

Please never stop these vids lol never laughed as hard as I do when I watch this series

6:55 are we not going to talk about the texts there?! 😭

9:40 A lot of people's dads are in Syria, apparently

The added visuals with the moving pictures are just the cherry on top, just that much more hilarious lmao

2:22 "the city of Constantinople (also known as Istanbul) was visited by the Sofia Cathedral" How is this even possible?

8:40 HISTORICAL FACT: He kept his fingers crossed.

I loved the important mention of that day where a German man made a sausage. Truly a historic moment.

4:02 "This is as bad as the time I caught the black plague"

Weird Google Translate Wiki page: "In 1654, Ukraine annexes Russia." Vladimir Putin: "Hold my vodka! Let's make history!"

3:22 Thanks, but sadly, we rest in pieces...

“You can’t sleep right now, there are Hot Huns selling steamed rice in your area.”

H U N G A R Y I S A W H O R E.

“I’m sorry” and “Winkle” tabs got me good

“Mongols conquer the Sun” Can’t wait for The Hu to make a kickass song about it👌

5:40 damn they really outdid themselves in that counteroffensive

As a Filipino I can confirm that the Island of Leyte was Obliterated by the American Carriers and Japanese Planes.

"Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Genghis?" "Oh, that isn't smoke, it's steam! Steam from the steamed rice we're having! Hmmm, steamed rice!" "- . -"

3:33 I guess they're probably talking about the battle of Saule (which might've actually been in 1236), where the pagan Baltic tribes of the Samogitians and the Semigallians defeated the crusading order of the Livonian Sword Brethren.

21 seconds in and I am laughing already. This made my day. The 14th Anniversary absolutely killed me.

11:26 HE's first appearance in this series

"Vladimir Putin gave his arms to China" God dammit, you made me spit water out.

3:49 French furries

5:40 your Ukraine is Australian.

7:15 Is that the witch doctor that's got spells to stop pregnancies?

OMG! I love linguistic shenanigans like this. It's always so much fun looking at the results of mistranslations.

"Geography is not for the elderly" and "Sausages from Vienna are the meat of the middle class" are, hands down, the best excerpts from this video, but the whole thing is a masterpiece. I also like how "Jewish people" was translated as "debauchery".

11:26 after the new videos this makes a lot of sense, after everything HE has done

4:56 the first one that actually makes sense. The UK (in modern day at least) has three legal areas: Scotland, Northern Ireland, and England and Wales. England and Wales are in the same legal area.

Why does it always say "he will catch his slave" whO WILL

14th anniversary of the 14th anniversary of the 14th anniversary of the 1783 anniversary of the birth of the 1783 anniversary of the 14th anniversity, I may be wrong, but that's 68495728 years, must be a VERY exciting anniversary.

13:26 Me in 2015: Can I have a beard, please?

8:48 the number is 0

These bad translations have vibes strangely similar to what happens when you use AI to try and make a story.

I can’t believe *HE* was arrested and fined 10 dollars for theft.

6:00 slavery 9 sounds like the name of a planet they’d go to in futurama

I want to see a monument mythos style analog horror series based on this video.

9:57 That's actually what happened

As a German, it is very tragic that I'm dead.

"Iosif Ibn Nagrel, who was the first Muslim to enter the city of Granada, did not die" This was important news in 1066, when most died shortly after being born.

Wow, thank You so much! A good portion of nicely remixed history is a sure way to brighten my day. Are we going to talk about the sections "I'm sorry" and "Wrinkle" at 04:12? Edit: We should also consider "Infobox Military Conflict" (05:27). Also, it would be interesting to know more about following events: 1. Don't worry ; 1.1. Holds his slave ; 1.2. Don't worry ; 2 Give birth ; 3. Better. (06:04). (Is this Republic of Gilead history, or WTF?) 09:51 - Finland knows very well that Finland is not afraid of falling into the dark. (Well, not only Finland, every decent metal fan knows that very well.) "Sakha is known to be a good place for people to be slaughtered." (OK, wow. Literally no comments.) Also, as a Ukrainian, I would like to thank You and the Sakha language Wikipedia for the brilliant historical fact with a nice illustration at 05:42. Now this really made my day.

6:07 William Herschel, thanks alot!

8:42 Technically correct, the best kind of correct!

5:40 The good ending

13:05 “takes” means “trade (trading)” in Turkish. He really is a Guinness World Record Holder.

3:07 HE'S STILL OUT THERE

3:53 Dad came back with the wrong milk...

10:45 Debauchery 😂😂😂 But the explanation on the tab though ☠️☠️

This was farrr too good, i wanna see more videos like this

3:41 "In the Legends, a Hero sought to conquer the sun. He succeeded. Then he became emperor. The -Cabal- Mongols are a simple people."

Very historically accurate

I never thought wikipedia would peer pressure me to go into Kazakhstan but it wants me to do so

14:06 since that day, the Congress lived of totaly fear and terror from the might of two John Wick's

This is the first and only video from this channel that I've seen, but it's enough to subscribe. Watching this late at night with people sleeping in the other room, and was barely able to keep from howling with laughter. 🤣

13:28 Yes, sir. I would like a blonde shiny beard that will be around 30 centimeters and easy to mantain. Thank you!

Someone make an animation out of this.