Do This to Stay Sane When You Fall In Love (4-video Compilation)

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Do This to Stay Sane When You Fall In Love (4-video Compilation)

Рет қаралды 34,581

Күн бұрын

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Nothing ruins new love like an agenda. If you grew up with trauma, you may end up romantically attached to people before you've gotten to know them, but there's a better way to date! In this four-video compilation, I share four of my most popular videos for people with CPTSD who want to change trauma-driven dating patterns and find real love at last.
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Пікірлер: 217

@timjohnson2186 Ай бұрын

To whom ever reads this, I love you. Keep going.

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thank you for sharing this :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

Thanks!🙏 ❤

@NhungNguyen-zf3bh 29 күн бұрын

❤❤❤❤thank you

@bedailvenerabile 29 күн бұрын

I love you too💗

@AthenBerlin 27 күн бұрын

Love you too, we survived ❤

@Unreality3D 19 күн бұрын

One nice thing about taking it slow is that if the relationship is healthy you will never lose it from taking your time.

@Ohhhwehere 19 күн бұрын

that's very true😊

@MyAkachi Ай бұрын

People need to open their mouth and communicate. "Shall we kiss?" or "Would it be okay if I kissed you?" will give you a clear answer, instead of trying to infer that her playing with hair or hair not pushing your hand away from her lower back at another time meant that it was a greenlight for you to kiss her. People need to open their mouth and communicate. Especially when you want to do something of a sexual nature.

@RC-eb5hq Ай бұрын

A guy I was very attracted to told me he wanted to kiss me. That made me see him as respectful and gentlemanly. We went on to have a sweet romance.

@kmduarte2005 Ай бұрын

Exactly! Some people read way more into a look or an action than what’s really there. Some people think just saying hello to them means you’re interested in them.

@Ohhhwehere 19 күн бұрын

yes! Iv never felt so happy as that moment I learned about verbal consent, I love when people ask if they can kiss, hug ect, before they move closer. Its such an amazing blessing to know that information❤

@3506Dodge Ай бұрын

I've benefitted from no longer assuming others' interest in me. I see that others aren't interested in me and I move on...and on....and on....but I don't have the strained and confusing experiences I used to have with new people. If no one is interested in me, so be it. But, the new emotional calm and self-awareness I feel has been nice.

@jasonfitzpatrick414 28 күн бұрын

Sad.

@ofyourbluesky 26 күн бұрын

Why? @@jasonfitzpatrick414

@Alignmented1 4 күн бұрын

You've grown, that kind of calm can only come as a result of growth.😌👍🏻

@TheEmanuelaG 4 күн бұрын

This comment was really helpful to read. Thank you.

@A.l.a.c. Ай бұрын

I'm dating a man now and my situation started like the first story. But my guy reacted very well to rejection in front of me, he accepted it like a gentleman, wanted to be friends and all, he didn't give up but gave me space and in about a month I decided to give it a shot and it's been great since! I don't regret.

@RC-eb5hq Ай бұрын

Speaking as a woman, if a man doesn't know where he stands at beginning, WORST possible thing you can do is push harder! That feels unsafe for women. At least 1/3 of women in US have been sexually assaulted by age 25. When in doubt, DONT PUSH HARDER!!!!

@MsHellcat08 Ай бұрын

This! If we say no, believe us! Don't listen to online male dating "experts", listen to the woman.

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

That stat is not true.

@kibbecapsule7571 Ай бұрын

It absolutely isn't, thanks for pointing it out.

@sunshine-cm5xn Ай бұрын

depends on the definition of assault but yeah, I bet every girl has been sexually harrased (just by being looked at grossly, being catcalled those are the 'mildest' form of harrasment) before 25. Not to mention this girl mentioned her history of being abused and wanting to take things slow, giving absolutely clear cues about not wanting to be kissed. For the life of me I can't ever understand this person who translate his own desperation-tinted-colour-glasses, somehow thinking that this girl needed another encounter like this. She prob gave all that speech about 'oh it's not you it's me' bc that's the only way she knew that she was going to be safe from some the backlash from rejecting him. Trauma response is all over

@Auntijengen Ай бұрын

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy What is the stat? If women don't report most of the time, how can it be verified? ?

@BrocolliGirl Ай бұрын

Wow I needed this. I have met someone who has shown me what real love is. We are taking our time and we are learning about each other. He has shown me what true love is. It’s terrifying.

@jewelj7507 Ай бұрын

You inspire me. Like Anna you’re showing us that this is possible. Bravo

@jasonfitzpatrick414 Ай бұрын

Listen and take it slow. Be honest and open. Ask, if in any doubt.

@Augfordpdoggie Ай бұрын

If he is a good human, tell him that, and give him all the evidence that you are only into him

@carolnahigian9518 Ай бұрын

When nothing goes Wrong; trust my folks to blab: critique; and RUIN any relationship.

@sylviahalo 29 күн бұрын

Me too. Just the past month or so. I’m so afraid. And so happy (AKA terrified).

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

“Eroticizing rejection “ kind of like Peppe Le Pew

@tracybrown3569 Ай бұрын

She clearly golf him that she needed to take it slow. Yet he didn't honor her words, he actually did just the opposite and didn't respect her boundaries. No thank you.

@itachiuchiha6876 29 күн бұрын

Yeah, exactly. Him asking me months later why I’m not into him would freak me out and cause me to just block him. Desperation is so aggressive, and sometimes terrifying. You’ll KNOW if someone likes you, you shouldn’t have to second guess it. Plus, why would you even want to be with someone who’s hand you have to borderline force. The writer of the first story is so icky.

@turquoisetoile-universalethics Ай бұрын

I spent eight agonizing months this past winter being in limerence with someone because of confidentiality rules (I met her in treatment program) not knowing what kind of person I was dealing with because she wouldn't share with me either. I spent eight painful months until someone told me she wasn't gay. I wasted 8 months in terrible pain because I was hoping something might work out. I was relieved to finally let go of her, but exhausted. Living in a fantasy is not worth it.

@RoadRunnergarage8570 Ай бұрын

Exactly.. After all of the heartbreaks I have had with women,I have decided to just put my passion into my model car building in order to fill the void in my heart...

@toria8660 Ай бұрын

I have established that for so long, I "acted" like what I thought people should be. I made a lot of very stupid mistakes due to this. I didn't trust my own thinking or feelings. I tried to be like other people. I sadly based a lot of my thinking on how things happened in movies. So grateful I discovered what's been going on and learning and understanding about myself now. I'm starting a new job and working on trying to show up closet to my truer self rather than a weird version of the person I think everyone wants to be.

@annarorick7151 Ай бұрын

One thing that would get me is having to kiss on a first date. Become a friend and go slow.

@chiaraA. Ай бұрын

I don't think she wasn't really interested in him.... I think it's impossible to say - but I DO think his quick moving on her really was a turn off and she decided he wasn't for her and sounds like he triggered her - because she was crying in her car right after - in fact she could have decided that he just was not safe and she was upset because she thought he was a better guy - and maybe he actually is a better guy, but he came off as a not that great type guy

@Captain_MonsterFart Ай бұрын

Sounds like he was pretty pushy also. Might have freaked her out.

@jasonfitzpatrick414 28 күн бұрын

Fear on her part? I hope they both are ok.

@michaelawood7763 4 күн бұрын

Sounds like he minimized emotionally berating her, I think her instincts were great

@sunshine-cm5xn Ай бұрын

well this video rly makes me feel upset. STAY AWAY FROM A YOUNG WOMAN WHO DOESN'T WANT TO BE KISSED BY YOU. like how can you not take the hint???? why would you feel entitled to push yourself onto her? I feel uncomfortable listening to this, I can't imagine what that girl might've felt. yuck. I guess I'm sorry to be unkind and blunt but I really empathise with her more than this person. She cried in her car, she prob have a history of older men forcing themselves onto her and her response is fawning and that make my blood boil. Poor girl.

@samaraisnt 22 күн бұрын

yeah less stories from men. at least ones like this. there are sympathetic men but he ain’t one.

@michaelawood7763 4 күн бұрын

Agree agree. I hope she has a strong female community

@EverydayImmortal Ай бұрын

I do think it's good to not *need* a relationship in the sense that you are okay with the possibility of never getting it, and have learned that you can be happy with or without it. Basically shedding that feeling of having a relationship being life or death. Definitely nothing wrong with wanting it and taking steps towards finding that great, healthy love.

@charliefox9573 29 күн бұрын

Agree, though it's easier said than done to stay in that mindset when you're middle aged and have been alone for much of your life, despite having everything going for you.

@MsHellcat08 Ай бұрын

Why can't men believe us when we say NO?

@willemfeather2655 Ай бұрын

"There's no substitute for words". "Careful and measured." Yes! Allow closeness to build slowly. If it's not builing, you'll know - long before kissing.

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

Feel good about a rejection because it makes your choices refined!

@itachiuchiha6876 29 күн бұрын

I agree with everything fairy says, except for the part where she says he could reach back out to the girl. That girl made it clear she was NOT interested and likely does not want to hear from the writer and is likely moving forward with people who don’t literally pounce on her on the first date. The writer should leave that girl alone, and stay away from her. No need to ask “why don’t you like me?” that’s a super uncomfortable question, and comes off as desperate enforceable, like he already came off as on the dates.

@AthenBerlin 26 күн бұрын

Well I believe there's a misunderstanding. I think the point is, our fairy can correct me of course,to openly express his feelings so he gets a clear reply that will help him go on. Otherwise he will be imprisoned in this phantasy that creates doubts and hopes, which will finally not allow him to find his partner to be. 😊

@michaelawood7763 4 күн бұрын

@@AthenBerlin that's not the girl's problem at all, she deserves peace

@AndiAlexander1 28 күн бұрын

Unfortunately men get this advice to look for “indications of interest” instead of just using what humans have, language. Then they try so hard not to get “friendzoned” that they make it unsafe for the woman to actually feel any attraction she may have felt. So the only thing she can do is feel like friends or feel assaulted. Usually we choose friends.

@RoadRunnergarage8570 Ай бұрын

People that have a common interest... I just joined a local Model Car Building Club and it is great to share my passion with others and it helps me deal with all of the heartbreaks I have dealt with..

@sara_sofia_1984 Ай бұрын

This culture you have in the US about kissing someone on the first date feels really bad to me. That is going way too fast and why would you kiss someone if you don't know them enough to know if you want to be in a relationship with them or not? That's putting the cart before the horses, in my opinion. I take the approach of getting to know each other as friends first and then decide if we want a committed relationship before we kiss or do anything else of a sexual nature. I'm not surprised things often go wrong when people are rushing into kissing before they feel ready. If you want to know if a woman has a romantic interest in you, just ask her with words, and hopefully, she will be honest with you. If she is not rushing to kiss you, it doesn't mean she isn't interested. Don't make assumptions.

@sage6238 Ай бұрын

Haven't even watched he's the video yet but judging by the title, this is exactly the video I needed 😭

@godzillamanstreb524 Ай бұрын

Me too🎉

@user-wc8mn2gh6y Ай бұрын

me too

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

We're all rooting for you :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@BASED.88 Ай бұрын

Why would I date someone if I couldn’t see the possibility of marriage? The second I meet someone, I’m weighing the possibility

@ofyourbluesky 26 күн бұрын

I never want to get married

@Ohhhwehere 19 күн бұрын

depends on what you are looking for, when I left my last x I wanted to date again after one year, but only for the fun of it and it was great! we all had a good time with no strings attached😊 And then 3 years after the break up I felt ready to start finding someone to marry so my entire dating pool got switched out with potential partners, after a few months I met a great guy and we have been together for 8 months ❤

@melaniegrace7707 Ай бұрын

Anna you are just so good at what you do I’m so glad I found your videos

@singha6 Ай бұрын

A kiss could be construed as an assault if the other person is not ready or wanting to. The woman may have been crying because she felt violated.

@samaraisnt 22 күн бұрын

“could be” how many people that you don’t consent to kiss you would you like to kiss you??! People obviously cry when they’re upset.

@saraherrick4675 Ай бұрын

Could use your crappy childhood pen. Met someone out of no where, haven’t even connected like this with anyone in a very long time if ever. I saw the red flags of impulsivity and moving too fast so I set healthy boundaries and barriers. But I still ended up falling pretty hard for him, he touched placed in my soul I don’t know how to get free of. But then he started showing signs of disinterest, blowing me off and withdrawing. I haven’t learned about immerence yet so I know I need to look into that. But it’s just been so frustrating, he got past my walls then disappeared. Last thing I needed, I even saw it coming but still got caught up in it. And ya I’m struggling being present with no pressure. I think the cptsd has taken over and I can only handle being with someone if they can see forever with me which takes time. But I get attached too quickly then all this neediness I’ve never allowed myself to feel comes out and pushes people away. I guess the key would be finding someone who loves that neediness and isn’t freaked out about it bcz im not sure it’s healable at this point.

@mrcollinsjuju1569 Ай бұрын

When it gets to mutual "I love you"s and then they go back to their ex... that's the stuff that kills a spirit.

@RC-eb5hq Ай бұрын

Ooohh...ouch. if it's any consolation, a guy I was dating asked me to take care of his cat while he was in Europe. 3 weeks later when he returned, it came out that his previous girlfriend went with him!! Could have knocked me over with a feather. Always a red flag when they don't end a ride to the airport or to be picked up. LOL!😂

@user-do3qz7kt2m Ай бұрын

I can’t even find the wrong person dating at 55 I just can’t even get a date for coffee every one seem to be taken 😢😢😢or weird 😮

@jasenkavukelic5047 Ай бұрын

I can relate so much! I am 40 and live in a small town in Croatia.

@RoadRunnergarage8570 Ай бұрын

I know the feeling.... My hobby of Model Car Building help me with the loneliness..

@jasonfitzpatrick414 28 күн бұрын

I'm 57 and agree. Married, divorced, kids, nutjob, career focused, doesn't see me measuring up, etc. It's better to live in fear. I feel like a fraud.

@icedcoldcoffee Ай бұрын

So timely, it is my birthday today and on reflection mode, so many things to unlearn❤❤

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 29 күн бұрын

Happy Birthday! Glad you are here! Nika@TeamFairy

@jasonfitzpatrick414 28 күн бұрын

Happy birthday.

@jodiburnett6211 24 күн бұрын

If anyone makes this much of a public fuss over you, it’s about them putting on a show and living in a storybook like they saw on tv. “My Dream Girl” The guy stated that his fantasy illusion he had for her from the plan of the first date. This is the adolescent fantasy we all got trapped in with sketchy programming. Dopamine is not Love. The excitement we must unhook from to heal takes time. Thanks for your Fairy clarity ! 🙏🏽❤️

@joannarose8138 Ай бұрын

I mean the whole video is filled with gems and great resonance but 25:58-29:29

@cristinaxo Ай бұрын

Yes - this part was awesome - expressed so well and authentically 👍

@amandasodhi 27 күн бұрын

The girl said she had an abusive ex and trauma. Imagine, if she was clearly asking to take things slow because she had faced sexial abuse and insteaad this man violated her / tried to coerce her into a kiss twice in barely 3 meetings, triggering disturbing memories and resulting in her feeling not ready to date. I don't understand how this man is the victim - he left her crying after violating her and never asking / looking for enthusiastic consent before trying to kiss her. That sounds predatory, followed by toxic sarcastic comments he passed on to her and then messages he sent her later he's now ashamed of. Sorry, but not feeling any sympathy for him.

@samaraisnt 22 күн бұрын

all men think they’re the victim…a common occurrence is r/pists will cry to their victim and say “I didn’t mean to, I’m not that bad am i?” and then SHE will have to comfort him and say “Nooo you’re a good person! It’s okay.” mind you the women are always younger but have to be the mature one. All I needed to hear was he’s 31 and going after 25 year olds cause they’re his “perfect type.” uh huh.

@michaelawood7763 4 күн бұрын

I'm with you, sounds like he was very punishing to her

@JOCECIL Ай бұрын

Im in a very desmotivating place. I dont produce attraction and the few that shows to be attracted are emotionally ill people and or peiple that are really not into me. The worst part is that I suffer for limerence and anxious insecure attachment. I choose celibacy to avoid hook ups. I really want to be happy and loved and to have a bright life.

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 29 күн бұрын

We're here to support you! Nika@TeamFairy

@elise2914 23 күн бұрын

I agree with most of this, EXCEPT the bit about reaching out to the girl now. I think she is afraid of this guy, who pushed the boundaries she gently tried to set due to past abuse (sounds like she had a freeze/fawn reaction with the hand on the back but she clearly wasn’t into kissing), then made angry, sarcastic comments because he felt rejected, then left her crying in her car, and is now obsessing over her months later. He needs to stay far away from her and work on respecting women’s boundaries and letting information in rather than imposing his fantasies and needs on others.

@jasonfitzpatrick414 Ай бұрын

I am currently destroying my relationship with someone I think I love. So, after I get my head out of my ass, I'll watch the video. It might be a few days. Thanks for the advice, Anna. I'm so sad I screwed this up. I think she is right that the pain of wanting love is good. It means we want to attain love. I think she is the one. I want to just learn all about her. I want to be with her all the time. I want her happy and safe. I need to be myself, and it is tough to be myself so she can love me. What a year it has been.

@joannapowell3579 28 күн бұрын

Re the first story…I generally have so much sympathy for the people who have the courage to write in, but something about how this guy thought the girl was sending secret non verbal cues that she actually wanted to kiss, even tho that wasn’t at all what she said, gave me then creeps..

@atillafiliz6591 22 күн бұрын

Getting the creeps is an excellent warning that something is oit of the ordinary. Dangerous, manipulative or narcissistic people trigger those alarms, but unfortunately so do some awkward and anxious people. Those comments of his are typical for men without much social experience and learned things through books or internet. Gotta put your own safety first though.

@joannapowell3579 16 күн бұрын

@@atillafiliz6591 really good points, thank you

@chamuuemura5314 29 күн бұрын

Great video. I think with the first guy, her crying in the car could’ve been triggered memories of sexual abuse. Unless she gets therapy, she’ll likely be emotionally unavailable to any gentleman yet willing to trash herself with a bad guy. That’s a symptom of BPD (which can be worked on with therapy). Relating to her emotionally and dwelling on that shows he needs therapy, too, because this is his method of self-trashing. I’ve been there and am so grateful for that honest answer @18:00 and getting therapy.

@Augfordpdoggie Ай бұрын

Being ugly, i dont have this problem.....ahh the peace and tranquility

@jasenkavukelic5047 Ай бұрын

I know, right? The older I get, it's easier.

@orjibaby Ай бұрын

Oh no 😂😂😂😂😂

@nannysplace30 Ай бұрын

Your advice towards the end is a very poignant one. I have one foot in and the other foot limping out. This point is well received . Thank you for what you bring into this healing community.

@NotebookMapofLemon Ай бұрын

Needed this. Recently did first video call to this guy. I “think” we vibed? And i think we both did feel feelings. And i was going in spiral. What if he rejects me. What is he dates someone else. What if i make fool of myself. What if i have to get embarrassed. It was baaad

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

We understand as few others can. Glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@ellebee9864 28 күн бұрын

Yes, I absolutely hate the ruminating. It can be worse than limerence.

@zeitgeist5134 Ай бұрын

Perhaps you would do a video that addresses this problem? A 'friend' whose actions consistently contradict her words. Though she always protests her loving fond regard, her actions make it clear that I am a low priority, if indeed a priority at all. For example, a repeatedly promised visit, including emails announcing that she is on her way!! But she never arrives (never bothers to inform me of her change of plans) because she decided to attend a Demolition Derby instead. This is typical, consistent. The Demo Derby is important. I am not. (Oh, how the myriad excuses will rain down if I talk to her. She says that things got "convoluted". ???) It does me psychological harm every time, though my husband advises, 'Don't let it bother you.' He's right. By now after years of this, I should step back and do a Buddhist detachment thing. We each have our priorities and I don't happen to be her priority. But, dammit, I sucker for her (usually vague) promises every time. I invest myself in her proffered connection though my rational mind knows that she will not deliver. Perhaps you remember the annual cartoon in the old Peanuts comic strip, the cartoon where Lucy hold the football, Charlie Brown runs to kick it, and then at the last moment, Lucy yanks the football away and Charlie Brown lands flat on his back. It's like that. I believe that this "friend" is entirely unaware of how her actions contradict her words. For all I know, she treats everybody the same way. She presents herself as a love-love-love person, all warmth and smiling approval. In a way, it's true...except. Though I am a very isolated, lonely person who has no gift for connecting in a deep, trusting way, I am seriously considering telling her, "Go away. Don't ever contact me again." I don't want my gut to have to digest this crap again.

@zeitgeist5134 Ай бұрын

@@toria8660 Thank you, Toria, for your reply. So, it's not just me. I am comforted. Very similar. Even the part where she got angry when you did not comply with her request. So that ended the "friendship". In my situation, I myself will have to take the initiative. Maybe today. (She's coming here to pick up seven trash bags of free horse manure that I had filled for her---a lot of work!---and that I had expected her to take away after her "visit".) I want to do it with a moderate, civil tone of voice. I am thinking that I will give her the opportunity to explain the "convoluted" excuses. (I was previously thinking of refusing to listen to excuses, but that would be in-your-face hostile.) I was thinking that I would then say, "I know that you are unaware how transparent you are. The Demo Derby was very important to you, but I am not...and that's okay. However, to avoid enduring this kind of thing in the future, I am now ending the connection between you and me. Go home. Do not contact me ever again." Even as I have been writing this reply, I have been editing and refining my scenario for this, weeding out hostility. I hope that you don't mind me using you as a sounding board. When I wrote the original comment, I was seeking a sympathetic ear to help me work it out. Perhaps I should just ghost her...

@zeitgeist5134 Ай бұрын

@@toria8660 It is so kind of you to help me sort this out. I just watched a Crappy Childhood Fairy video, "Graceful Endings for Friendships". kzfaq.info/get/bejne/ipame86bvrG-qJs.htmlsi=6Xk2G4r-GFf_Pg1i&t=278 I got this implied take-away (my words): "When you end a friendship, you are not obligated to explain to the ex-friend why you are ending it. In fact, it is better not to explain. However, when contact occurs, be polite, if not friendly." it's kind of like courteous ghosting. I think that I will go that route. It does sound like you ended your difficult friendship in a courteous manner, infused with compassion for the flawed person. Well done.

@zeitgeist5134 Ай бұрын

@@toria8660 In the comments under her "Graceful Endings to Friendships" video I asked Anna to respond to my take-away. She replied, "You are not obliged to explain. But it's not "better" to avoid this." I did prefer my "polite-ghosting" interpretation, but I will follow her advice. Turns out that your process was the correct one!

@AthenBerlin 27 күн бұрын

What a great video. Thank you so much for all that you share with us and help us so much.

@sudaminis1302 20 күн бұрын

Great video. I am a big believer in true love and I can never stop hoping.

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

Good advice! A lot of culture puts stress on you to rush something and grab your girlfriend/boyfriend fast of someone else will get them. Hasty decisions will cost you happiness!

@hulahandskc 4 күн бұрын

Thanks for posting. Saw myself in parts.

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

Got the message to speak your mind and reveal your blockage. Moving forward! Thanks!

@mikki4155 3 күн бұрын

This guidance is gold! Thank you❤

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 2 күн бұрын

I'm so glad it was helpful! -Calista@TeamFairy

@Uli55585 Ай бұрын

I loved the last video about the cab light 🚖💡

@marcin3136 Ай бұрын

"to Stay Sane When You Fall In Love" 🤔🤨😵‍💫😆😅🤣😂🤣🙃🤭😉😋

@pablobarrera7613 28 күн бұрын

New relationship? Not even a date is possible! People have become weirder and weirder every passing day!

@karbrzozowska9299 Ай бұрын

You are such a gift!! ❤

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@ellebee9864 28 күн бұрын

I love you Anna!!! My cab light is now so bright that I am attracting borderline stalkers (after only one no-contact date). How do I SAFELY turn away someone who does not meet my criteria???? 🙏🏽🙏🏽

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 28 күн бұрын

Thank you for watching! If you'd like to share your story and ask Anna a question, feel free to write an "Ask the Fairy" letter. You can do it from here: bit.ly/CCF_Letters Nika@TeamFairy

@jenniferlynn3721 22 күн бұрын

She was listening to her intuition.

@zadabeasley Ай бұрын

The world needs more love.💕

@catherinekittykat Ай бұрын

SUPER EXCELLENT FOR EVERYONE TO HEAR👍👍

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Glad you think so! Nika@TeamFairy

@danaw23 29 күн бұрын

Thank you ❤

@irmamakrevski5652 9 күн бұрын

1:00 erotising rejection 18:40 when limerence happen 20:30 communication and c-ptsd 22:30 why is now empmtiness strong 27:50 do not be entitled bcs of c-ptsd 29:00 crapfit - settle for whatever and you get whatewer

@laureensanchez6491 Ай бұрын

Thank youuuuuu🎉

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and taking the time to comment! -Calista@TeamFairy

@natalie77867 29 күн бұрын

Ew, he sounds like so many avoidant men I've dated. Chase to 'win' then ghost. Ginny had a lucky escape imho

@RoadRunnergarage8570 Ай бұрын

TBI -( Traumatic Brain Injury ) makes it impossible for me to read social cues so I don't even bother with dating... I just enjoy my life the best I can...

@jbpoeticjustice Ай бұрын

Thank you for putting into words what I've been pondering lately. The cab light analogy is super helpful.

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 29 күн бұрын

I'm so glad the video was helpful! -Calista@TeamFairy

@alexandriaavelar7599 22 күн бұрын

Physical intimacy should never take the place of emotional intimacy and vulnerability. Waiting on kissing (this CAN take several dates) till the other is genuinely ready should be respected. Take her words seriously she had a boundary and it wasn’t respected it was pushed in a more secluded setting that can feel too fast even predatory for some people if she was crying in her car.

@Belerofonte64 25 күн бұрын

Thank you Fairy, you have been responsible for so much healing in my life❤❤❤❤

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 24 күн бұрын

Wow, that's so wonderful to hear! Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@BlastBeeeats Ай бұрын

Thank you.

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@jamie8005 20 күн бұрын

Agreed. I once got a kiss on a second date bc I “gave the universal signal” of applying chapstick 😆

@Alignmented1 4 күн бұрын

Had he stopped his car when he saw her crying in hers and apologized for anything he might have said or done and asked her to start everything from the start, with lots of patience &warmth this time, I reckon it would've brought her closer to him cuz she would've detected "hmm.. he seems to really care.. he's sweet and gentle". You don't just drive away when you see someone you care about cry (even if that cry was from her own internal struggle of how she's unable to open up and be less uptight).. As a woman, I can feel her struggles, maybe chronic lack of trust,similar to the ones I had when i was her age ..

@Marwonderful 21 күн бұрын

It’s like you’re reading my mind…And calling me out on all my unhealed tendencies. Love your videos

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 20 күн бұрын

We're so glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@Marieelle1985 Ай бұрын

Great ❤ thanks :)

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@NiceNSpicySouth Ай бұрын

Thank you

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thanks for watching and taking the time to comment! -Calista@TeamFairy

@shantbarsoumian101 28 күн бұрын

I agree with a lot of what you say and share for people that deal with CPTSD but I have to push back a little on your idea of "The One" or the "Perfect Love" when people who are dealing with CPTSD in their romantic relationships. I understand that you don't want them to "crapfit" a poor relationship and try to make it work. But I feel like this idealized "The One" and "Perfect Love" is not helping them on the opposite end. My Ex is a Dismissive Avoidant and I'm sure it is a result of her CPTSD. They can be dismissive of very good and healthy partners and abandon good relationships due to a single perceived red flag and convince themselves that their partner was just not "The One" and if they were their "Perfect Love" things would just work out and be easy. But this is because of their unprocessed trauma and not wanting to process their emotions, just bury them when someone gets emotionally close. This will leave them safe from emotional intimacy, which they fear, but ultimately alone.

@ellebee9864 28 күн бұрын

Yep, I run from healthy partners at the first sighting of a problem.

@shantbarsoumian101 28 күн бұрын

@ellebee9864 most avoiants do. They have low self esteem due to unmet emotional needs as a child which their parents couldn't or didn't fill. The child feels unlovable deep down and thinks that it is only a matter of time that a healthy partner who gets too close emotionally will realize they are unlovable and abandon them. They have such a high fear of abandonment that they will preemptively abandon, run away from and discard a healthy partner that is demanding emotionally intimacy and closeness. They feel safe with their walls up and push partners away and bury any feelings they have as a self protective mechanism.

@ellebee9864 28 күн бұрын

@@shantbarsoumian101 🎯🎯🎯 You just read me like a book. Smh

@noremac0123456789 19 күн бұрын

This is so true…I’ve skipped over some huge red flags because of rushing in to fast.

@JoySpirit888 4 күн бұрын

God's blessings to all Amen 🍀🙏😇😇🍀🤗💜

@nnglnd 29 күн бұрын

Kissing is very important.

@estherharing7430 10 күн бұрын

I think she wasn't ready to kiss so soon, you can be into someone, in the way like, I absolutely want to get to know this person better and even starting to develope some feelings, but kissing is a big thing. People underestimate it. In fact I only want to kiss with someone I feel a connection with build on trust. To kiss with someone that feels like a person that genuinely cares about me. He wasn't in tuned with her feelings and pushed her. I am sorry for her that he wasn't safe for her. He needs to do some inner work and she too.

@Brody.W Ай бұрын

Amen and amen.

@RoadRunnergarage8570 Ай бұрын

Therapy,Meds and Hobbies will be of help of him to get over her..

@stacyjaye6350 Ай бұрын

Meds?😂NO

@kre8504 23 сағат бұрын

There’s a guy who says Hello Sunshine & while I like those words, he doesn’t go much further. So, I just call him a connection, because all he can seem to say, is Good Morning Sunshine & that’s as far as it goes. Though, sometimes he says a few other things, it’s like I have to say more, to get him to connect. ?Not sure what to think abt this? ?It seems odd to me?

@samaraisnt 22 күн бұрын

*31….25. All I needed to hear.* If they met naturally, fine. But he filtered for younger women and his “dream girl” is significantly younger than him? All I need to know right there. Of course he forced her and wouldn’t take it slow. He needs a 30+ year old but he’s stuck in adolescent delusions and projections. A man who protects “she wants me” with no clear signs (erotic delusions) is dangerous.

@JuanitaClifton 20 күн бұрын

Waiting 17 years, no dates.

@dr986 Ай бұрын

I have the same problem over and over, we chat and get on, a guy asks for a date and I agree, he then disappears because he’s with his children or something and I get triggered, I’m unsure if they’re showing me they don’t care about how I feel or this is just normal and my feeling sad they didnt send me a good morning is too much? Even when I broach it gently it results in the guy disappearing 😅

@MissBluebirddays Ай бұрын

How long do they disappear for? And try not to have expectations ie good morning texts, it'll kill the relationship before it's had a chance!

@ellebee9864 28 күн бұрын

I loathe the GM text now after learning guys send them out to a global list of women. If your name is not in the message, it could have gone out to several other ladies.

@michaelawood7763 4 күн бұрын

Feel bad for the Jinny lady. Sounds like she was treated very badly, hope shes doing alright.

@atipachaleka9172 16 күн бұрын

Will it ever get better?I pushed away someone I loved and he broke up with me because he has ADHD.I have always been positive but today I woke up feeling drained.I have isolated myself since morning.I apologized to him and we are now in no contact.I am heartbroken

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 15 күн бұрын

Hang in there! Nika@TeamFairy

@Infinityflowyoga 25 күн бұрын

I feel seen 🤯🤯🤯 omg !!!!

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 25 күн бұрын

Glad you are here! Nika@TeamFairy

@sarahharte1845 Ай бұрын

First here I love your videos ❤

@CrappyChildhoodFairy Ай бұрын

Thank you for being here :) -Calista@TeamFairy

@yonitznkc Ай бұрын

I’m 62 -fix m up with Bonnie.

@laveniajohnson2283 Ай бұрын

With the first letter Anna read I expected her to say something about the man being less interested in the women who were passionate and sexual with him than the woman who wasn't. He was obsessing over the woman who seemed to have values. This is the cruel reality that needs to be taught to women. Most men will try to have sex with you and go ahead and do it if you agree, but he will like the woman better who resists him. Its a test, of course they won't tell you that, and will usually take sex whenever and with whoever. But the one who resists is the one they want.

@Captain_MonsterFart Ай бұрын

It's an infuriating GAME guys play. Why do I have to play coy?! God help me.

@Ad-nu4tk 9 күн бұрын

is there a way that I can submit an issue? I would love your feedback

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 8 күн бұрын

Anna isn't able to respond to every letter she receives, but we would love to hear from you! You can write to her here: bit.ly/CCF_Letters -Calista@TeamFairy

@prisca5 Ай бұрын

How do we come to let our cab light shine? Seems overwhelming to me, even it is my goal

@Unreality3D 19 күн бұрын

Sure seems like a red flag to me when you aren’t at all concerned whether you’re the other person‘s dream date and don’t respect their input as to whether or not you’re a good fit for them. Relationships can’t be perfect from one side only.

@BlastBeeeats Ай бұрын

🖤

@louisvelazquez5608 29 күн бұрын

Is this the 4 videos together or is this part 1?

@CrappyChildhoodFairy 28 күн бұрын

This is a compilation of 4 videos on the same topic. Anna releases compilations every Sunday, each time on a different topic, and all of them certainly refer to childhood PTSD. Nika@TeamFairy

@louisvelazquez5608 28 күн бұрын

@@CrappyChildhoodFairy thanks 🙏

@mysteradio Ай бұрын

🎉

@Doodlefisher Ай бұрын

57:46 👍

@FabulousSquidward 21 күн бұрын

I'm sorry but who the hell has snails in their house 😂

@tessyutu Ай бұрын

love the snail analogy :D

@user-vt6pk2xt5t 28 күн бұрын

I think she was in love someone else and he did not want her and she was still thinking abıut him.

@timjohnson2186 Ай бұрын

She is right. GOD IS LOVE

@Augfordpdoggie Ай бұрын

Which god, zeus?

@almightybeanchild Ай бұрын

These religious nuts need to eff off

@dereksowers628 Ай бұрын

Not sure this is good advice. Let your perception run wild and be in the moment. Kissing can happen one hour in. By third date you should both feel interest in your stomach.

@LiaaT__ Ай бұрын

Not even my fault anymore even with all trauma at this point most people can't be trusted.:) They just aren't serious or drop you. Lol what's the point. And yeah none of them are that attractive anymore to me