Yes, so many people who've never been abused by narcissists will say it's your fault or you're being ungrateful. They've no clue what we've been through.

Dude, this totally wraps up the relationship with someone unstable. The smear campaign ruins your reputation with people you were once close with and they don't understand the circumstances

Dude, this totally wraps up the relationship with someone unstable. The smear campaign ruins your reputation with people you were once close with and they don't understand the circumstances

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

Like speaking a foreign language ppl didnt go through it. These demons are excellent actors, know how to frame things perfectly only way is let them go and theyll expose themselves

So true!

The climate with the ebb and flow, that's how I'm interpreting what you're saying. I always saw the ebbing as the downside, and the flow as the correct, upside. Don't all relationships have highs and lows? How would you describe "normal" ups and downs of a relationship?

@@peggylyons6898 not as intense or unpredictable

​@@peggylyons6898 The way I see it, the downs in a healthy relationship won't include verbal abuse and a deliberate inconsideration of the other person's feelings, a total lack of EMPATHY

Yes, that is accurate.

Yes,yes it is sickening🤢.It's like breathing in dangerously polluted air the whole time you're around them.

I would agree.

100%

Same

Couldn't have said it better myself.

Know all about this and am so sorry. My last visit a nightmare, worst ever. I wish I could say it was my last, remains to be seen.

I feel ya, I had a lot of the same. It was odd learning my GI issues might've been due to her stress. thanks, "mom". I hope you're doing better now!

Hi guys. I wrote a little song about this and I wanted to dedicate to us. It’s called Because of You. Because of you I never stray too far from the sidewalk Because of you I learned to play on the safe side, so I don't get hurt Because of you I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me Because of you I am afraid

I just came up with that on my piano keyboard like two minutes ago.

Same for me....the covert narc mother. I'm 60 now, and have spent my entire adult life walking on eggshells around her.

Spot on!

This!

Yes, exactly.

Going through this now when I know they’re around me or same room I feel on edge instantly

Completely devoid of any peace or joy. I always wondered why my husband's extended periods of time off work were complete nightmares. I automatically assumed that everyone deliberately tries to enjoy their time off. That's not possible for someone who's miserable.

They sometimes steal your good name too.

That's why everyone always says how tired they are after being around them for a while,it's exhausting dealing with them🙄😮‍💨.

Yes! Interacting with narcissists is so draining. I always needed to get down time after spending my time with toxic people.

@@francesbernard2445 Just like the movie "Face Off". They steal your identity and replace it with theirs.

Whenever I'm away from narcissists, I'm energetic, funny, creative, excited about life and laugh a lot but when I'm stuck with them, it's like I have an illness that's slowly killing me. I'm weak, sluggish, wired but tired, unmotivated, and lack any enthusiasm for life. I do believe a lot of people develop adrenal fatigue from the abuse

You described what I always felt 😊

When you tell the truth people with nothing to hide like you but the fake snakes say you are a mean asshole

No. they let you talk bad about someone. and then use against you. thats why you walk on eggshells.

Being the truth seeker and teller in the family was truly a lonely even dangerous place to occupy in a toxic demonic family a grew up. I was a gentle very caring child. And never understood why when thing when things went went wrong the real offender would be left off and I would be punished with my narc mother looking on!! Grew up with no self -worth and damaged. Thank GOD for much information on this topic .

Same here and I hate it when they play victim 😒

​​@@christianaobiyan4224same still picking myself up and getting my sense of self .

Facts

Right, constant poverty mindset. We don't even have electricity. 😢

You can sense that something is off and it's a bad feeling

Omg perfectly worded. I felt this around my narc Mother in law, took ages for my brain to understand it

Yes...very much yes!!!

Please read the body keeps the score by Gabor mate

Your comment reminded me of an actual fishing trip on a lake once during which time if I had not let someone's dad by surprise confisgate His borrowed to me fishing rod back early from me on which I had hooked a regular sized fish on soon enough -- Then our boat could have capsized. The English language has its limitations whenever I 'only' a woman was trying to make any report about his bizzare behavior to the courts or to police since a whole lot of people are into stereotyping bigger people in a big way too. I should have maybe caught on I guess when I was dating him that one day while he was ordering me around near shore to be doing a photo shoot of me for himself. While I was wearing a borrowed to me wet suit when I was alone standing in position on only a rubber raft to be some day maybe getting to hold His spear fishing weapon being stored away at the time somewhere.

Your comment reminded me of an actual fishing trip on a lake once during which time if I had not let someone's dad by surprise confisgate His borrowed to me fishing rod back early from me on which I had hooked a regular sized fish on soon enough -- Then our boat could have capsized. The English language has its limitations whenever I 'only' a woman was trying to make any report about his bizzare behavior to the courts or to police since a whole lot of people are into stereotyping bigger people in a big way too. I should have maybe caught on I guess when I was dating him that one day while he was ordering me around near shore to be doing a photo shoot of me for himself. While I was wearing a borrowed to me wet suit when I was alone standing in position on only a rubber raft to be some day maybe getting to hold His spear fishing weapon being stored away at the time somewhere.

My husband has a half brother that he barely knows, from one of his mom’s previous marriages. (His mom was adopted and married 3 times by the time she was 30, and had had 5 last names by then! ) Anyway, my husband’s own father, who was technically unrelated to the half brother, took the two boys out fishing and -my husband said that--his dad paid a lot more attention to the boy from the mom’s previous relationship than him, his own son! How sad is that! And that is just one example of how neglected my husband was as a child. I’m kind of glad my husband didn’t see this video. 😢

Yes so true! So how was the other 50% of the relationship. Hmm....not so good. Exactly.

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

That's hyper vigilance. Anything can set them off immediately. They'll even make things up to get angry about. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop is hell.

The LOAF always tastes so much better than the crumbs😉.

The fight or flight has been my go to in the last years moment a person raises a red flag am out if they don't accept responsibility directly without minimising

Amen to that whole A loaf of bread!😂

That is why narcissistic parents are so damaging in most cases. Unlike with physical or sexual abuse there is no smoking gun. You look back at your childhood and notice only the good things and not the underlying emotional abuse you experienced on a daily basis.

You're amazing 😂 I seriously needed that! Get on with your bad self👍

In today's forecast we have a 99% chance of diarrhea rain with thick dense fart cloud cover...I swear this is what it's like dealing with them for very long🙄🤣.Somebody needs to invent face diapers because it really is like farts & 💩 coming out if their 👄 s from the gaslighting & everything else.

Maybe he trips and lands on other knee..lol..

We had one too. Once he retired , the workplace was quiet ❤

Our work narc sucks the very air out of the room and replaces it with toxicity

Run 🏃 run for the hills

I would say that it 's projective Identifikation. You can Google this. Very interesting

Yes impending doom is exactly how it felt.. and then I was told I’m a negative person, I shouldn’t rely on others to make me happy, I overthink etc

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

It's your core values being invalidated and manipulated. 😢 Its the uneasiness of seeing how far you've let yourself be gaslit by this horrific soulless person.❤

But when one of their family members walk in the room everything changes and they smile and pretend to be this nice person.

Me too! I was sick all the time with my ex. I think I knew at some level he was cheating on me, fooling me, so instead of trusting my gut I trusted his words. My body reacted to my own betrayal! I am so sorry that you suffered...

​@@charliesmomMe too unfortunately. I was in deep denial. Just listened to the lies and ignored the obvious so I wouldn't have to be alone for just a little longer.

right? exactly how I felt! I went back after being apart for a year because I was lonely and he was the "devil I knew". Turns out it was the most abusive, damaging encounter! He tried to destroy me! The devastation I felt was so deep I almost felt like giving up. The loneliness seems way better than the pain from this final blow. Oddly enough, now that he is completely out of my life, that loneliness is gone. I guess I needed to completely break in order to start my new life without him. its a difficult journey to recover all that I lost, but it is all mine without that unsettled feeling. @@chickensandwich3398

Nagging lack of safety... that is the bad energy Ramani speaks of. Perfectly put!

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

Same brother.

Same here bro..

Post discard, I had no vocabulary to express how I felt, too humiliated to discuss it with anyone. As I keep on reading, the direct expressions helps a lot.

I wonder if somewhere in the back of their minds they realize that people are happy when they're gone? That most people can't stand them? Maybe even throw s party when they die?

​@pamelaminor696 no they don't comprehend that at all. In fact they go their merry way and tell people you developed a bad vibe etc ... And who else would put up with it like they did etc. Blablabla....

This encapsulated my home life growing up and my marriage that I am no longer in! Just moments of...

Well this explains a lot about why the "Good moments and times" don't out way the " bad moments and times"

I hear u Emily.Seems closely similar to my condition

This is exactly right. I’m living with my narc parents because I’m having health problems and unable to work. I am constantly subjected to cruelty, manipulation, and disrespect, but I am unable to say or do anything about it because they have financial control, and fighting it would do nothing but drain my limited energy. I am slowly disappearing into myself. It’s harrowing.

@@Askalott That must be really hard for you and it's all way too common. Our constant present dilemma is testing us, it's the waxy dark candle and we're the flame that's capable of melting it when fierce and firey enough! All of us are going through these power play situations to some extent and can learn alot from our experiences if we consistently observe rather than absorb, respond tactfully rather than emotionally react and stay focussed on what we're doing, saying, thinking and feeling that feeds into it or not. I'm not sure what your situation is but it can help to have a 3rd party such as an organisstion, support network, group, carer or close friends you trust to check in with you regularly to defuse their abuse, perhaps get onto disability support and save what you can, journal daily and meditate mindfully on who you really are and what you do want, in being grateful for what you have you'll always have more, never give up on yourself and your dreams as everything changes and there'll come a day where you can put them to good use. Sending prayers and big hugs you keep shining your light bright hon! xox 📖✍️🙏 💪🕯🤗🤗🤗💕✌️

Don't suffer and die in silence as you can spy on his/her location, calls and socials to find out with proof that he's cheating and file for a divorce if married

Check Shadowbyte7 for assistance and also on any cyber security related issues also

He's On telegram

I have had similar experience.....pls explain y do v have crest n trough kinda life?

Or they ask you, and you you foolishly begin to respond...they immediately begin to talk over you, LOUDLY, as if you were not speaking at all, much less answering a question they asked about your day. What day? I didn't have one. I don't exist.

Yeah....that's how I felt just deprived. Alone... Still tied to this cooko a hole.

same! these videos help me make sense of how horrible I felt when with my ex

Best advice I could give is listen to the emotion and not the mind because if you have suffered narcissistic abuse very likely that is the voice of the narcissist not you.

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

Yes, I learnt intuition never fails. Trust it no matter what. I would had saved sooo much suffering if I'd followed it

Many violent and abusive people feel powerful and strong by making other people feel unsafe. The damage they do to the victim causes trauma to be trapped in the body, screaming to be released. If someone makes you feel unsafe or uncomfortable do NOT engage. Trust your intuition. Toxic people literally make a person feel sick and causes visceral disgust.

Im feeling you.. totally.

not everyone is a narcissist

Same here brother.. 🇮🇳😢

Me too. And sister. The 2 of them together....that's my Labour Day weekend! They bring out the worst in each other.

Here too

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

Yes they do!!

BUT you didn't fail!! Go on with your bad self!! Live your life!! Proud of you!!

I've been in your spot. Let me tell you you are gonna do so well and achieve all your dreams on your own! Celebrate your peace!! I certainly did!! 😅

To me it was like poison in my blood.

There are some old proverbs that speak of that feeling. Proverbs 17:22 - A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 15:30 - The light of the eyes rejoiceth the heart: and a good report maketh the bones fat. Proverbs 16:24 - Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones. Proverbs 14:30 - A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.

Amen to that! 🙌🏾I'm still sharpening my discernment, assertiveness, and boundaries. I can deeply relate! It makes doing the work on yourself so much more difficult, (especially with having younger children, or any child or children at all, because you want to break those trauma bonds and generation norms). I often have to remind myself to unlearn the mind numbing control of those words, "but it's your family and they love you". Listen, if you have to Jedi mind trick me into your words, rather than show up as the person/family/friend, that you're intensely trying to convince me that you are, then we have nothing. A pure hearted kind loving person will never have to say who they are, they just are! Much love!🙏🏾💜💜💜🤍

Lol. This comment 😅

It's a lot like the stench of a very full outhouse in August on a 100°F day in my opinion😅.

​@@motivationstartsnowThank you..humor is why I didn't off myself as a kid 😊 👍

Good point, their level of dependence. I got stuck overseas after my Dad died, with my mother, when Covid lockdowns hit. Now I can't get away.

I will be thinking that over. Just moved to be near aging family members, but I'm now rethinking rhat choice. 😢

​@@cc1k435Be VERY CAREFUL if you have elderly narcs among you!You want to stay far away from that stuff,they tend to actually worsen in various ways with old age😱💩💩💩.

There will ALWAYS be the gaslighting & walking on eggshells among other 💩...There's no magic "Off button" on their issues & the perpetual scheming NEVER stops from when they awaken to when they 😴.They'll tend to go into more covert behaviors IF they need you a lot but it's STILL there😬.

I can relate so hard with this. Why is it always holidays???

Psychological terrorism damages the psyche and the body. Constantly holding your breath and walking on eggshells, waiting for the next bout of abuse and potential violence grinds the victim down like a dripping tap placed over the forehead to torture a person trapped and held hostage in a trauma bond.

Yes it does feels like a soul draining, you are depleted!!

Bizarre isn’t it? Something within us was warning us.

@@Groundwater24 yes! We can always count with that voice that tell us to take care.

Once you start to understand what these people are you can articulate this sense of impending doom around them.

Mine were so puzzling. But now I see it was about "Control." Exited college with flying colors, I felt like I could conquer the world, only to be dismissed, invalidated by my parents. They were afraid they couldn't continue their effortless, robotic plan to control by devaluing me. I'm glad I didn't jump off a bridge before learning what this was all about.

That’s the hardest part about narcissistic abuse. You feel guilty and ashamed instead of feeling anger about what somebody else did to you. You internalise the pain. I’m 45 now and am still in the process of convincing myself none of this is my fault. Counselling is very important for this I feel.

That reminds me of Phil Collin’s great song, “In The Air Tonight”. All of the emotion in the drums and his voice are so powerful and validating.

​@@ButterflyB127irrelevant

@@Clara-km5eu- maybe to you but not to me. I feel that energy and that song resonates and has deep meaning to me.

​@@ButterflyB127Your comment was valid. The rude person who replied to you is more than likely a narcissist. It's obvious looking at their comments.

This reminds of "the prince of the power of the air" which is Satan.

Me too and it works now too with my x. Simply tune him out and try to erase him boy does he get mad. Then I laugh at him... He thinks I've lost my mind. 😂

Now that we have info that can be put into words... How do you build emotional strength and courage to cutt ties for good. No matter what I do say ect I feel tied to this serpent.

​@@laurac.9322 I am really sorry that you feel so tied down. I've been in that hopeless, helpless place where it seems you are now. Not everyone is going to understand but, for me, it came down to what felt like a real life or death situation because of all of the psycho-emotional abuse. It got to the point where I genuinely felt I had no choice but to cut ties because my mental health had gotten so bad from the abuse and it was affecting my physical health more and more. They never took accountability so it didn't matter what I said either and I was constantly being scapegoated. The trauma bonding was real but I wish I had cut ties before my health got as bad as it did. Maybe I could have prevented some of the trauma and damage. It's like damage on a soul level. By the time I cut ties, my nervous system was so dysregulated. I am currently healing by doing a go at your own pace online program with Irene Lyon. I'm sending you courage and emotional strength to do what feels right to for you. I hope you find peace.

My family dynamic was like that too, almost exactly. We were really active in the church, and everyone saw this family that worked together and put on such a unified front when people were watching. Except my father was on his own side the entire time. I thought he stood with me against my mother and my brother, but he wasn't on THEIR side which created the illusion that he and I were fighting them together. Then when I needed him, nope...he was on his own, gone, outta there, sucks to be you, kid. My father would say things like "I worked all the time so I didn't have to be at home." or "I had to take antidepressants to deal with your mother." If he had to do that, what hope did I have? I asked him that a few months ago. If he had to do all these things to cope and he was really hurt, what about me and what I had to go through to deal with them in his absence? Did he understand how hard that was for me and how I turned out to be the miserable failure nervous emotionally stunted wreck that I am? Ha. I hope you are doing much better!

@@spacegirl226 I'm trying to process what happened by writing when it comes up, I'm hoping that can help. Maybe I'll try to find a new therapist some day. My dad died eight years ago after four months of cancer. He in some way released me from the responsibility I felt towards him, to protect him. After we had been out for a short walk to get him some fresh air she said in a harsh tone "you didn't go longer?". That was in the last weeks before he died, I could almost see him withering away each day. Who says that to their spouse when they're dying? Sometimes I regret not getting away at eighteen, but the plan I'd had for years failed before I got done with school. I'm adopted, so I've felt let down from the start. My dad mad so many excuses for her behaviour, because of her upbringing, like that's going to be my problem now🙄 So I felt very alone, like no one was really on my side. I've had some health stuff to deal with, I tried again to give her a chance... "I'm not surprised"😒 She tried to say sorry few days after on text. I told her it's a start, it wasn't good but she's not used to it😂 She didn't like me not wanting her sorry or help so we agreed on no contact at the end. She was sulking because I apparently "don't like her" if I ask her to take responsibility for her actions. It feels good to be free from her, just have to remind myself how awful it is. My mental health is always better when she's not around.

I've just been thinking of some people showing different personas of themselves to different people and how often I'm the only one with whom they are abusive. The criticism, head games, abusive speech. And it never pays to grumble, because nobody who sees what they are individually meant to see, will ever believe you. In fact, some will be very angry or disgusted with you if you share one of your interludes with Saint Narc.

I remember that feeling well when my ex father in law would stay with my ex and me for the holidays. My FIL lived in the UK (we were in the US), and he used to come visit every year and stay for about a month with us. The first couple visits were all right, but about two weeks in was the limit before his father became moody and insufferable and started wreaking havoc on everything. It was a cycle, every single time. Two weeks and his dad would get mopey and start causing fights because he couldn't regulate his emotions. His dad was very similar to my mother with her histrionics and temper problems, and of course I would get triggered. I tried talking to my ex about it, saying this wasn't right and wasn't fair that we felt like hostages in our own home to his father, but I had to suck it up because his old man was helping us buy groceries or some such. Trying to talk to his father about it ended up with him getting angry and sulking for days on end, which should have been peaceful that he was keeping to himself. Instead, we felt that bad energy and felt bad because toxic parents had broken us both and dominated our lives. We were both accustomed to trying to make THEM feel better while disregarding how they made US feel. Whew. I get you. It's exhausting. I'm glad that crap is over. I hope you are doing better and can get through this visit with your head held high and your wits about you.

@spacegirl226 reading your experience made me go " yup" bc I get everything you said. The tantrums. Feeling like a prisoner in your own home. My husband understands his parents are narcissistics but he's too trauma bonded to let go. He never makes excuses for the bad behavior but for cultural reasons he won't disown them. I was at my breaking point with them so I'm officially low contact. I've blocked them and when they visit I grayrock. I'm afraid of my young children falling under their spell. Ugh when will this shit end?

Also they no longer stay in our house and the maximum stay is 3 days. They used to stay for at least 2 weeks and bc I'm a stay at home mom i had to spent the most time wirh them. Unbearable. The longer they stay the more comfortable they get and the masks slips off.

@@cassien7585 I am so sorry you have to go through that. It's even harder with the children having to witness it and not being able to tell them what's going on or why you are uncomfortable. At some point your husband is going to have to realize that "cultural reasons" are destroying your family and come to terms with your family being more important than his "cultural reasons." His parents aren't going to change -- we know that! In my estimation (and I am extremely cynical because of my own upbringing) this narc stuff isn't going to end until the parents pass away because your husband doesn't seem to want to step up and set those much needed boundaries. It's a crummy situation to be in, and I hope your family can come up with a solution that benefits the group rather than two nasty, domineering narcissists.

@@spacegirl226 thank you for understanding

Good for you. I did that left many jobs.. it sucked for me but it did make it better for others.

Yeah thank you helps immensely.

Yes, the ex narc finally escaped this past March would talk at me like that too; he delighted in his claim that I am an ungrateful person. Creepy energy .... Also, energy vampire.... Though I am happy to be away from him and finally on the healing path, I still have reverberations of that negative energy intruding upon me at times. So thankful for Dr. Ramani and the supportive people here

Same here too. Both my parents are narcissists who have made me feel crazy like I'm the problem. They've trauma bonded me into staying with them far longer than I should have. And my adult life was put on hold. I knew something wasn't right in the way they treated me but I felt like a bad selfish daughter for leaving. Especially since they said they would stress out and die if strokes "worrying" about me if I moved out. Now I know cutting contact is the only way I can live my life and find peace and joy.

@@kimberlychristine9284 the no contact thing is not easy cos you feel like ur betraying them, but in all honesty they have left you no viable alternative. If you stay you die slowly inside every day.

Call them out on it. Loudly

After battling substance use disorder and homelessness, I finally recovered and was on my way to living a good life. Then my world came crashing down when I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder, small fiber neuropathy, and a chronic C. Diff infection that antibiotics aren’t curing. I am now unable to work and back living with my narc parents. My days are dark, and I feel like I’m suffocating. Like you, I’m also trying to find a way to escape. My heart goes out to you. May we both find peace someday.

There are a lot of online resources available for finding online work... a few LinkedIn groups dedicated to it. In addition to whatever training you have from your degree, if you can teach yourself to code or edit video, that opens up more online opportunities for at least part time work online as well. There is also demand for online English tutors. It may not be 100% in your field, but if it gets you some independence it could be a stepping stone. Keep looking!

@@Askalottsame stuck due to economic issues

or the worm in the beautiful apple you must look out for and avoid at all cost .. three years no contact after 40 years of pain .. Thank God it’s over

The intermittent reinforcement; the sprinkles of validation random enough to keep up hope. Yes, the worms might be thin but it's what the fish has been hyper focused on chasing. They don't like doing any positive validation for anyone else; for each individual sprinkle, they are pushing themselves to do it, because they need to control how others perceive them.

Or the hope is you will get something like pulling down a slot machine handle! I won't play because I refuse to gamble with their sick behavior.

Idea: The old religious figures/Greek attempt to give mental and physical diseases through black magic and the medical community. They are schizophrenia. They are narcissism. The old religious/Greek figures have put people in genders of bodies that are not their own with an evil purpose. This is why trans people exist. And surgery is a basic human right. They are also responsible for detransitioners existing. They abuse on gender and sexuality and control in these areas to attempt to confuse and change souls from who they are. The old religious/Greek figures are all controlling our bodies and are the voices. They are getting in our bodies to rape, murder and speak thoughts that are not our own. They have long term evil intentions and a very long past to cover up. Religion has been used against the human population and the fear of hell for a long-term purpose of keeping us controllable. This is beyond full body/mind control they can do magic style. The old religious/Greek figures are arranging the marriages/relationships of the populace without consent. The psychic rapes are from old religious/Greek figures not a human person. It’s not kundalini as well. Twin flame is very dangerous. It’s a fate based system where everything is chosen for you on birth. That life is just planned and it actually is by the old religious/Greek figures to be honest. But truly if you think about extreme poverty and acid attacks you’d have to see life is not fated. It’s a mess. The universe couldn’t know you at 0. I would never try to take the idea of love or potential of love from someone. It's the idea it was created on birth your lover and it's very fate based. The world and you was done the day you were born. And it can be used against you the idea of a match up that is chosen in advance of you becoming you by the universe (but is the old religious figures). And that things are set in stone and you don’t choose your partner. It sets you up to not see abuse and to accept any treatment because they are the one. It’s so dangerous. You have a forever someone who will have to work to remain your forever just like you will but it’s not set in stone and no one knows who it is besides you. You just will have a lover. And it’s the religious and Greek figures trying to control people to get together. By forcing souls to be with one another without consent through manipulation and control. Trying to get in the idea that the universe knows your partner or yourself better than you. Trying to plant signs of something that is not. They do this with all sorts of topics. They are the one touching you and talking to you. Evil Cupids. Evil People. We all will win though. And people will know that control exists. Who is truly at fault. And love will be found. If you want it. And there is unlimited food/drink in heaven. I wish you all the best. 😅😮😢…😂❤🎉

Being alone is WAY better than dealing with these types & the flying 🐒s/enablers that prop them up... It's a darn treat compared to that🥳.Great comment🙂👍🏻.

Just the other day I thought about the fact that I actually have some "good" memories... snapshots, as Dr. Ramani calls them. Wow. Desert islands in an ocean of endless sorrow. The memories are what we hang onto. What keeps us hooked. My family wasn't all bad. My 2 marriages weren't all bad. My narc bosses weren't all bad. Yet here I am in my 60s, zero relationships. And that's not all bad either...